It's NOT all DOWNTON ABBEY - My Life Marrying into the British Aristocracy

[@AmericanViscountess]

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[@marguaritetherese3156]

The best etiquette tip I got from Downton Abbey was that etiquette means knowing which fork to use, but good manners means not letting on when someone uses the wrong one. I really like that sentiment.

[@MDWJS]

exactly, i pretend i did not see it and enjoy the dinner and my friends.

[@sierra9713]

Loved that too! So true.

[@mom2adragon677]

I grew up in a very wealthy area, River Oaks in Houston. My family lived there but we were as backwoods as a stray dog. I was told by a socialite mom that good manners is making others feel comfortable. It was a great life lesson.

[@nunyabiznez6381]

The first time I was introduced to that concept was when I was 12. We were invited to dinner with my mother's 2nd cousin who had married a baron so she was a baroness. We are Americans and my mother's cousin maintained a house on Cape Cod while her husband had a couple of homes in England. So at the dinner my little brother is slurping his soup and my mother starts to admonish him when the baron picks up his bowl of soup and slurps it very loudly with a twinkle in his eye.

[@krdiaz8026]

And good morals is not making fun of that person behind his back.

[@bhansen5551]

When I was about eight years old my family was invited to a big dinner party by friends of my parents. We were all sitting around the table eating when Mom looked shocked and hissed at me, “What do you think you are doing?!” I looked at her wide-eyed and said I was just eating my soup, and she hissed back that was not soup, that was the gravy for everyone. Oh, my gosh! I was eating the gravy out of the gravy boat - I was so embarrassed!

[@gardenroom65]

Hahahahaha

[@tinahuttner7280]

Wasn’t there just one dish for the gravy,that’s usually how it’s done.

[@bhansen5551]

@@tinahuttner7280 I hadn’t noticed there was just one bowl of gravy until Mom brought to my attention that I was eating the gravy. 😳

[@godofchaoskhorne5043]

This borigut me back to a lot of horrible and embarrassing things I've done when I was a kid. I guess I'll think about that for hours instead of sleeping. I should probably continue reading my book instead of getting distracted by KZbin vids

[@MacabreQt888]

That's so great!🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@MD-lc7hn]

Finally an American aristocrat who appreciate English history and culture. Another level of class. Compliments.

[@Theleahwolf]

I love that you are teaching etiquette that sadly isn’t taught in the states. I also had a few mishaps but was at a smart dinner party. Italian rules are also very different but perhaps very similar to the UK. It’s fun to learn for sure but nerve wracking in the moment

[@kristenthomas3985]

I love that you take full advantage of this incredible opportunity to learn the family history and share with us and you do really good job.

[@charmedgirl90]

It would have been heartbreaking for those families to see their homes in that state and have to lose that part of their history. Im sure the huge loss of a number of heirs during the war also forced their hands

[@siiiriously3226]

i´m sure it´s more heartbreaking for a working class family to loose their homes due to the wars that rich people had them fight in all eras. or die on the battlefield. or work 15 hours a day in the fields...so yeah, my emapathy for richt people loosing their palaces due the wars they themselves startet is smaller than the empathy i have for the working class people that i, and probably you stem from.

[@MzJust1girl]

@@siiiriously3226 rich or poor or anywhere in between your home is your home. And to have it destroyed in a heartbreaking violation.

[@IronFreee]

It's also sad to whoever is not an absolute imbecile as those houses are part of national culture.

[@IronFreee]

@@siiiriously3226 You remind me of the red brigades who blindly killed all kind of people in the name of the working class, including working class people. Having an historical building damaged is a lot worst for the community than some regular house. Not because of the people who live in it but because of the craftmanship involved in building it.

[@carriemcconnell8786]

When you think about it, the 'truth' that the family says makes sense. He very likely had 'sandwiches' at his desk, alone. The 'rumor' of cards probably came about from it being the first time other people actually saw 'the sandwich ' being presented and eaten. They wouldn't have known that this was a usual because he had had it the privacy of his den before then.

[@wildflowerred6323]

I rather doubt the version where he asked for sandwiches while working at his desk. It would be a lot less messy to eat his snacks on a small dish with a knife and fork. The butler could just as easily serve that as a sandwich. A sandwich would still be messy when handling papers. Your fingers get greasy from the bread. Much more comfortable snacking at your desk with a knife and fork. When you have servants to bring you your meal at your desk, eating with a knife and fork is not an encumbrance. However, it makes perfect sense that if the Earl was gambling, he would have a sandwich brought on a plate and munch on it occasionally with his free hand while holding his cards in his other hand. This is how people usually snack in card leagues in which I have participated (although it’s still somewhat messy, so I always prefer not to snack while playing cards). Using a knife and fork requires two hands, so you would have to put down your cards for each bite of your meal.

[@terrydoyon6514]

My Grandmother 's Butler many years ago said to me ."Once the standards are gone there gone for ever." Ever since I kept high standards also I learned how to do hospital corners in the military in basic training.

[@mariemunzar6474]

@@ohana8535 it could just be a typo. Don't be a grammar nazi.

[@ohana8535]

@@mariemunzar6474 Did you bother to read my comment? I was trying to be helpful, but you swooped in and messed it up. Good job!

[@dabooser1048]

What's more interesting than what the butler said? Oh the fact that your grandmother had a butler.

[@msjaninah05]

I admire you for learning and respecting about your husbands family's history and tradition.

[@alekxa90]

When I was little, in my etiquette classes we learned that when you are asked to pass the salt, you need to pass both the salt and the pepper. They go as pairs, not separately and what you say was right, never across the table but in the shortest distance to the person asking for it.

[@leenam.4578]

Again, back in 1970, when I was a study abroad student at the University of York, another American and I traveled down to London by train. At some point we were feeling peckish but a full English tea was beyond our budget so I took it upon myself to convince the server to sell us a roll. He was as adamant in his refusal as I was relentless in my plea: "just one roll for us to share", as my friend doggedly tried to drag me away. Anne, I said, "its just one roll, and we'll pay for it". At this point he piped up, "Love to mum, but the guvner wouldn't let me." The ensuing scene was like something out of a cartoon when one character yanks the other out of the situation with the crook end of a cane. We both went flying down the carriage aisle as I realized he was referring to a 'roll in the hay'. Speaking of a faux pas!

[@deniserossetti9954]

Back in 1996 I had a dinner for my friends who were from Cambridge. All went well and I sent them out to relax in the yard while I prepared the dessert tray. I yelled out of my kitchen window, "would anyone like a tart?" To which one of my friends, a 20 something single male replied excitedly "Yes Please!" I said "oh good do like them? I love them!" Then all my Brit friends started laughing. I was a bit confused until they explained in England a tart is a prostitute...and I was talking about Linzer Tarts!! Lol

[@anglophils645]

Too funny. Also watch out for the meaning of “shag.” Years ago, a friend of mine from the southern USA was studying at the U. of Edinburgh. She went to a dance, and was invited onto the dance floor by a young Englishman. He said, “Would you care to dance?” to which she replied, “I’d like to, but all I know how to do is shag.” Here in the southern US, the Shag is a form of swing-dancing, while in Britain, to shag is slang for having sex. My friend has now been married to the Englishman that she met that night, for over thirty years.

[@amstergal]

Great writing, great story! 😄

[@amstergal]

@@anglophils645 Great story and so romantic!

[@Chachixo]

oh my goodness! haha

[@michaeltutty1540]

When laying a formal table, each setting should have a "salt cellar" in front of it. These are usually crystal but can be china, and accompanied by a salt spoon. Pepper pots should also be sufficient in number that there is no need to pass anything. On a not quite so formal table there should again be sufficient salt and pepper shakers the nobody need reach. This ideally means a pair of shakers for every two people seated at table. Having cooked and served 5 and 6 course meals to friends I know how much work and care it takes to lay the table properly and how many pieces of china, crystal, and silver it requires. Almost mind- boggling.

[@sayurimei]

I was about to post the same because I have a a specialization on food and beverage management, meaning I currently I'm out of work since I mainly work as a consultant lol. But when I enter to the specialization you literally went from learning the most simple work up to the most important ones, and all the ways this jobs make the final meal shine through. So only then you value the cellars, to polishing Cristal glasses and as you learn you ended up organizing formal meals for events for over 200 guests with up to 6 stemware suite and 7 course meals. Depending who was offering the event, I would had rather polish again the glassware than coordinating and oveerseing the whole meal.

[@rebeccaszymanski3529]

Every well-bred petty crook knows that the small, concealable weapons go on the far left of the place setting.

[@paulavalentine242]

That makes more sense. It’s ridiculous to pass the salt around to 6 people to get it to the desired location.

[@Itsgonnabeok1325]

I recently discovered your channel. I do love it. As an American great granddaughter (x14) of James IV (there are a lot of us), I was DRILLED on etiquette from my grandmother. She felt etiquette was essential for success. I think I’m the only person among my friends who knows the difference between French service and Russian service, and what every SILVERWARE (😉)piece is for. I always loved hats and have several. I miss England desperately (stupid Covid) and cannot wait to return. Very much enjoy your videos.

[@godofchaoskhorne5043]

I mean.. Wasn't Downton Abbey partly about how that life style and environment was basically going extinct as all the aristocrats were losing their fortunes and names? The whole show was about a struggle for the Crawley family to keep their lands, title etc. They had to bring in some nephew that was basically a "commoner" because they didn't have a male heir. As a young Turkish stoner (back then at least) from the Netherlands I don't think I was the target audience but I enjoyed it immensely. Recommended it to all my friends lol. I even liked the movie they recently made. Man... Such an absolute shock when my man Matthew was sent to the eternal plain. I feel sad just thinking about it. But in the end the show was about family, love, friendship, brotherhood, respect and love for each other. Which... Uhh is kinda weird considering we're following an absurdly privileged family and their servants who mostly seem to have some sort of Stockholm syndrome and are ready to die for their masters. Not saying the relationship wasn't beautiful and special but you know.. Let's be honest 99.9999999% of us want to be the privileged ones not the servants waiting for the bell to be rang. P.s. Lady Crawley losing her virginity to Osman Pamuk was a scandal that stuck with me as a Turk. And also the fact that no one raised an eye brow over cousins marrying (although they were somewhat distant cousins, I imagine it was pretty common for people to marry even first cousins back then, Esp. In such families to keep the family fortune intact)

[@ellabrennan8536]

I completely agree with you and I do think it should be noted that the servants may have had stockholm syndrome

[@ItsJustLisa]

If I recall correctly, Matthew was Mary’s third cousin or third cousin once removed, meaning the common ancestor was a great-grandfather at the closest. We had that here in the U.S. with President Franklin Roosevelt. Eleanor was his 3rd cousin. So marrying someone who it turns out related to that far out isn’t really that terrible. When first cousins and first cousins once removed are marrying, there’s all sorts of consequences. Just look at all of Victoria’s children and grandchildren. And since she had 9 children that could only marry royalty, well, that’s a pretty small pool. WW1 was primarily fought between 3 cousins- George, Wilhelm and Nicholas. George and Wilhelm were first cousins (King Edward’s sister was Wil’s mother). Nicholas and George were first cousins (George’s mother Queen Alexandra and Nicholas’ mother Tsarina Dagmar were sisters). Nicholas and Wilhelm were third cousins.

[@forgeustiss6667]

@@ellabrennan8536 As you recall, Cousin Patrick was an even closer cousin and Lady Mary was to marry him. BTW, there is no Lady Crawley in Downton or ever. Someone who is a lady by birth is Lady FirstName. Someone who marries an Earl becomes Lady NameofEarldom or Countess of NameofEarldom.

[@cherylcooper2739]

I wore a boater hat and a red suit to a wedding (I live in Texas) ( I thought I looked very smart) and a woman walked up to me and looked me up and down and walked off without saying a word…wow! I just held my head high! Later an elderly man told me how stylish I looked with my hat how he loved a woman in a hat! I still wear hats and have a little collection of them. It’s a shame that American women don’t wear hats! They are such a beautiful accessory to an elegant outfit.

[@LauraForty]

SOME American women don't wear hats--others of us love them, wear them year round and apparently are collecting them lol I hadn't really thought of it--but after you mentioned having a little collection, I realized I too have one, and it's growing. I now find myself on the look out for hat boxes to keep my hats free of dust.

[@cherylmacgregor5650]

I’ve watched a few of these videos now and I think you are amazing the way you have adjusted to a a different country as a well as a very different culture and have succeeded very well. I also enjoy the fact that you maintained your American-ness! You are a truly authentic person! Cheers from Fort Myers Florida!

[@theresanoble1695]

Love your channel. My daughter has dual citizenship and lives in London with a country home here in Canada, so I spend lots of time in the UK and have run into differences. I have toured many of the amazing incredible country homes and they are absolutely beautiful!! This is a lovely treat to relax with a cup of tea and watch your channel! 😊

[@purplehippy62]

As always, so entertaining! This has inspired me with a fun idea! I am a preschool teacher and think it would be fun to have a dress-up tea party...hats and tea cups! Right now, I am just trying to teach them to use a plastic fork instead of slobby fingers!

[@petbird19]

Oh my gosh I'm so excited about this channel! On a sadder note, what a horrific cultural and historical loss of those houses. I've gotten the since before that the British can be a bit annoyed with them but those incredible homes are such (and I would go as far to say) human historical monuments. It makes me sick to my stomach to hear about the damage and all the losses of art and such. I'm so glad there are systems in place now to protect them. We need that in my country.

[@ingeborgm6147]

I had to laugh when I read your intro: It is not all Downton Abbey. Lady Julia, I don't think anyone watching your videos would ever get the idea it is. You are a ball of energy. The fastest we ever saw the Ladies in Downton Abbey move was at dinner call! To be fair to them, no doubt they were exhausted from wardrobe and hairdresser details. We can see they lived a hectic life having to pay great attention to details of fashion and etiquette. (Making light of it is all in good spirit. They had their sorrows as do most of us.)

[@latishiabedwards1423]

She comes off as arrogant or super glad she's apart of the aristocracy even though she's bland.

[@GingerJoberton]

What a very interesting video, and, I'm in awe of your knowledge and intelligence. It's great to see someone so vibrantly celebrating history, as well as keeping traditions alive. I would love it if my band could come and play at the country house one day.

[@kristiN1214]

I thankfully learned so much about table etiquette while working as a teenager in Germany at a NATO Officer’s Club…it was very overwhelming at first but with observing it daily there while setting up the tables and serving, you learn quickly lol! Had it not been for that I would still be in the dark!!

[@tilliecohen2861]

Love the hats, Julie! Alberta is a great choice for your dissertation topic. About the salt, we were always taught not to pass just the salt, but to always pass it with the pepper. Maybe that's an American thing? We always had to pass the salt and pepper together.

[@kristinavogel7551]

I wear hats often in the Spring/Summer for lineage society events. I grew up in the South where etiquette is key-I was setting the table from an early age and have passed down so many rules to my daughters. It’s fun!

[@kayleenkrolikowski7442]

Love your content and the gumption it takes to face learning a thousand yrs of husbands history. My father's fam came from england to Virginia in late 1600s or early 1700. My maiden name (WIGINGTON OR WIGGINTON) is same as 2 villages (in yorkshire, Staffordshire and possibly 1 other) but ...u suffer from sane american affliction as I do, talking with your hands. My father says he has to duck when I'm talking. Keep up ur channel. LOVE IT!

[@hannahpumpkins4359]

I was at what is considered the best seafood restaurant in South Carolina - very, very nice place. I had ordered raw oysters, and when the server brought them to me they were presented without the shell, in a crystal dish, which was on another crystal dish filled with ice. I had never seen this before, and asked the server if the oysters were from a can. Her jaw dropped. She said to me, "oh my, of course not - we serve them this way so you don't have to deal with any potential sand, etc from the shell". The entire restaurant turned dead silent and I swear everyone was staring at me shaking their heads like, "bless her heart". My partner just kind of chuckled and said to me, "ha ha - the server put you in your place" (chiding me with a sense of humor), but I was kind of embarrassed that I was too much if an idiot to have figured it all out myself! I mean, the oysters were amazing, and clearly fresh - and me having had oysters mainly in bars when I lived in Key West, well, yeah, I'm kind of an idiot sometimes! And that was my oyster faux pas.

[@janis6363]

I wish it was my home when I see you sitting in the kitchen area. But I couldn’t possibly take the care it needs for granted. I think restoration of these manor homes is an on going generational project. All your history of these houses is impressive.

[@ibuguru]

In Brownies, at the age of 7, we had a day where we learned how to set a table - for family suppers, & for informal dinners. Later, I learned formal settings. We had in our family the individual crystal salt & pepper shakers for each place setting, and we had 14 sets, the number for a formal dinner. They had been my great-grandparents'. Learning proper manners is so important - good manners makes interactions go more smoothly and with respect for self & others. Too bad that manners, even saying please & thank you, is so little taught nowadays. The heirloom china and crystal may all be gone, but manners last forever.

[@amys2650]

Awe I can hear a little British/American accent mesh. You are so lucky Julie truly. My family’s history is a huge part of my life and I’ve been doing the genealogy of it. I’m a direct descendant of the Tudors. No joke I’m really related directly to them. I hope if I ever hit the lottery I just want to visit my motherland

[@maryjanekolesar8325]

Haha I was feeling I had the advantage knowing about table etiquette - growing up as an armies brat - didn't know about "passing the salt". I always learn something from your vlogs! Thank you.

[@timothywalker4563]

When my grandmother asked me to set the table she would say get the “tools” not silverware or cutlery just the tools! Thanks for the “Earl of sandwich” origin of the Sandwich story. I love the fact he was part of the admiralty, does make wonder when did this guy sleep?

[@MustardseedMomma68]

As someone who lived in England for a few years, watching your channel brings back fond memories. I will be watching more of your channel!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Thank you!

[@leeh9420]

I'd only comment that some of the things you talk about not being in practice in America are alive and well in the older areas of Virginia (Norfolk/Richmond), and probably older cities like Boston, Savannah, etc., at least with my mother's generation and before. Some of them are simplified from the traditions of British aristocracy, but others are at least indirectly preserved in one way or another. This comment was inspired by your comment about silverware. In my grandmother's house, "the silverware" or "the silver" was in the silverware chest and used only for special occasions. The general term for flatware was generally "forks and knives" as best I can remember (and that's often how it's referred to in my house as well).

[@justtsrey8024]

I love you!! An American fan from Los Angeles. Love your channel. Very entertaining and very educational. Keep it up

[@khumphrey2231]

God bless you. I would be making "mistakes" left and right, and then looking people in the eye with my "you have a problem?" look ...life's too short to worry about how you're passing the salt. Just be grateful you have food TO salt. LOL.

[@katpaints]

I'm 75 and grew up using a semi-formal table whenever we had company. We had napkins with the fold on the proper side, spoons, forks, and all of that depending on what was being eaten, but limited to salad/dessert spoons and forks and separate knives. I got married and tried that on my husband. He would not accept putting anything on the table that wasn't going to be used unless it was for company. Fifty five years later, I still prefer to have a more full table setting just because it feels special. I do think my kiddos know how to set a table, but I think one of the four ever does it. Our lives are not as formal as they used to be!

[@mapratt]

I have definitely worn hats - to protect my head from the sun, from severe cold. But also as part of costumes, my favorite being the time I performed an unaccompanied opera for solo soprano, where I played nine characters (including two wives, death, and an army), and used hats to help with character definition.

[@marthahancock7938]

It helps me understand in "Less Than Angels" by Barbara Pym, two sisters living together. One would lay the breakfast things, and then the other would sneak in and see if it was done right. On the other hand - you need to take your husband to one of the seafood restaurants in Baltimore, where they put newspaper over the table, then bring you crabs, a little plate, and a hammer!

[@leenam.4578]

LOL. My stepfather brought us to one of those Maryland crabshacks(?), and threatened to bring a takeout order back home. The dining area had cream colored carpeting, a requirement of the apartment management. I thought my mother would faint.

[@thebrookealyson]

I wear hats all the time! I just love them. I will never tell my faux pas! 😂🤣 Thank you for your videos. Absolutely love them. Happy Holidays!

[@suzettekitselman6914]

Hello Viscountess! What fun to find you! Really enjoyed the video and will watch more! I love the big houses and have worked restoring Victorians in San Francisco for years. Thanks so much for sharing your unique perspective ~ looking forward to more! Happy New Year!

[@saradecapua3264]

I love your posts. Of interest [to me], John Alden and Pricilla Mullins came over on the Mayflower in 1620. They are my 11 times grandparents and I am very proud of it. Please keep up entertaining and teaching us the workings of you beautiful estate.

[@dianadaschel8646]

Hello cousin! I too am descended from the Alden-Mullins line!

[@cecilialiao9461]

Greetings from NYC! I am new to your website and loving every minute of it. I have to compliment you for being so down to earth and goofy and funny and yet endearing. More power to you and your family!

[@tinagriffith841]

Julie, I found your channel only but a few months ago and I'm enjoying every bit of it. I can't imagine how stressful formal parties and dinners could possibly be to get everything perfect and the proper etiquette to boot. While speaking of proper, would you be so kind, if and or when you find the time, to do a video on servicing tea. The proper etiquette and equipage to serving afternoon and high tea the correct English (British) way.

[@AmericanViscountess]

Thank you! And yes Of course would love to film this!

[@lebkha]

The salt passing across the table had me giggle because I do that all the time and now I realised its a faut pas

[@tamaragrottker7677]

I've noticed that you have a lot of lovely knitted garments. Do you knit? I also really like you tea cup! I think it is great that you have married into this family. British history is amazing. My parents taught me how to make a bed. Doesn't everyone do hospital corners? I think I've heard of the salt passing before... sounds very familiar. We had a lot of table rules at our formal dining. My mother was very particular about this. As for hats? Yes, many hats. I love them! My dad used to always wear a hat. The hat fashion died in the 1970s. I wish it would come back. People used to dress so much better 50 years ago. I remember my mom always wearing gloves to parties.

[@thekingsdaughter4233]

I was still a young child when my mother "discovered" elasticized bottom sheets. She never looked back, and I never properly learned to do hospital corners. I can do some sort of resemblance, but a quarter won't bounce on them... ;-) :-D And I love hats and dressy gloves. I have fairly large hands, though; so not many vintage gloves fit me. :-(

[@zenlife321]

Loved the history of this. Thank you for sharing your life so eloquently and humbly.

[@phoeniciacloud1515]

I am planning to take a etiquette class with my daughters because I really enjoy it. I want to be invited to use our skills one day soon.

[@EEN63]

I’m loving all the history as well as the more current etiquette lessons. Just remember when you pass the salt to the left or right, it must always be accompanied by the pepper... regardless if the pepper will be used or not! They always travel together and never should be separated!

[@thekingsdaughter4233]

I am surrounded and outnumbered by people who don't know that. ;-) So when I dutifully pass around both (in our house, they even sit together on a little tray to make it easier!!), people get annoyed. "The _salt!_ I said, the SALT!!" Ah well... ;-)

[@AnnieWarbux]

Sure, because I want six people to touch the gravy boat and breathe on it before it gets passed on to me...🤒 I would have thought that Royals would have salt cellars!?🤔

[@EEN63]

@@thekingsdaughter4233 I feel your pain! 😒 I’ve experienced the same. Not everyone grew up with a mom and grandma who swore by everything Emily Post like I did, so it never really surprises me. However, I do wish proper etiquette were more prevalent and held in a higher position of esteem in today’s world. On the positive side, we can continue to do our part and lead by example and hope for the best that some of it rubs off on those who weren’t exposed to all the ins and outs of proper etiquette! 😉😁🤞🏻

[@Parallelfifthsblog]

Bruh, it’s just salt…

[@adventureswithbedouinbabe]

I grew up with all these table manners☺️I was raised in America but had a very European upbringing. We also tipped our soup bowls away versus towards us and the soup spoon away to eat our soup. ☺️I love table manners and ettiequte and know it’s a dying art form🤭☺️Love your show Julie🥰

[@judithswarovski3028]

Her accent is so charming to hear. I also love the similarity of her vest and mug!

[@NicolleRoesner]

Absolutely loved this video! Very interesting to see an American within the British nobility. Can’t wait to see the other videos!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@DB-hu4lu]

Thank you for your videos Julie, I'm in Texas and really enjoy all of them. This one answers a question I had been wondering about for a long time. I was curious about how and why the family residence changed from Hinchingbrooke to Mapperton. In several earlier videos y'all mentioned that another lady had owned Mapperton and was buried there but she was not a part of Luke's family and his grandparents then bought the place. I really love all of the history and I'm glad to find the answer about how this all happened!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Sadly Luke's grandfather sold Hinchingbrooke after the Second World War due to taxes etc. And he then bought Mapperton.

[@DB-hu4lu]

@@AmericanViscountess So even though he had to sell the family home you ended up with a beautiful historical gem!

[@Hechete]

You must have a deep fascination with history to not only tackle such a rooted family history and new culture, but to pursue your dissertation on top of that? Hats off! Mom taught me how to do hospital corners after working as a nurse. As for food faux pas...we were at high tea at a very nice hotel. I wasn't paying attention (Really good conversation!) and dipped my personal tea spoon into the communal clotted cream and stirred it into my tea instead of sugar. It took quite a while before I realized why no one else was having any despite how good it was!

[@suemills5108]

How wonderful to come across your channel! It is of special interest to me, living in the beautiful county of Dorset (Poole) myself - very much looking forward to catching up with your previous and future videos! Thank you!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Thank you so much!

[@margiesessions5329]

Love your videos. I just moved to japan but have been in Asia for the past 7.5 yrs so i find it fascinating to learn about your fish out of water experiences.

[@ruthrodriguez2532]

Your so cool. I live vicariously through your podcasts. When you swim in the pools, I feel the cool water. When you interact with your husband, I recall working with men from the UK in the oil and gas world. When you talk about your ancestors, my hear warns with lobe. I too love my anscestry very much. And now your working on your dusertstiin. I'm so inspired. Blessings to you and all at Mapperton. Oh, and your tiara is stunning. Amen.

[@mrs.shecky2089]

Love your show here. Today I had a problem with the music being louder than you spoke though. I hope that gets fixed. I love watching!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Working on it!

[@susansisson366]

Your Great Grandmother-in-law had smashingly good taste! And the hat looks marvelous on you! How did you keep it on your head with the wind blowing? BTW, I enjoy all your videos, I adore old country houses, and English life in general. I am of English lineage, although my ancestors came over early on, but I've always loved English history. (Enjoying the Last Kingdom series at the mo, but read most of the books years ago, and anything BBC is best quality -- always!) Any how, a big thank you from Coastal California, and do continue these charming videos!

[@waynewilson4640]

(Suzie) Enjoying your videos!! My Father was born in England in 1898 and fought in the first World War for Britain over in the trenches of France..awful. Anyway, because he was British, I learned a lot about manners from a very early age and love it all. One thing that he taught me was that when someone asks for the salt you always pass both the salt and the pepper! That was a hard one for me, as I would just hear what they wanted and just pass that one!! My husband and I lived in Scotland for awhile back in the 90's and I bought an adorable black fascinator and I do wear it occasionally and always get lots of compliments...loved Scotland and would go back in a heartbeat if I could!!

[@cherylmacgregor5650]

I’m very happy to run across your channel, as I was a big fan of Ladies of London. I’m also interested in British aristocracy and history.

[@ArabianShalifa]

I grew up wearing hats in Iowa, U.S. A. hats and gloves for Easter to church in the 1960- 1970s. Getting horses when I was 5 cowboy hats were worn for horse shows. Baseball caps sometimes kept the sun out of my eyes. The last 3 winter seasons The warehouse I worked in was so cold I wore a hat to keep warm. Between my hats, my parents hats, and husbands hats I can wear a different hat to work each day from late October though the Christmas season to not Freeze! I wear the same hat after that.

[@teen1208]

Julie! So happy to see you have a vlog, loved watching you on Ladies of London!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Yay! Thank you!

[@carolsloss8440]

I love all that you are doing to preserve that beautiful structure " home".

[@PHOTOSHOPBYLINDA]

... you are a riot .. lov the way you explain how things are done over there .. and lov learning all these things.. x

[@mavsyers]

I love hearing the British influence on your accent

[@amyschneidhorst1384]

From what little I have !earned about Americans marrying into the English Aristocracy, I appreciate how similar your family's story is to the many families who have grappled with financial and health issues, but had to deal with them in secret. You and your family have demonstrated considerable resourcefulness and grit and should be commended.

[@bernadetteberg3896]

I recently subscribed and I do enjoy your videos. I just finished watching when you bought a house in Italy and when you went to the flea market. I enjoyed looking at all those antique furniture!

[@johnboy32064]

Wow. So cool you get to live in that beautiful house!

[@irishinusa1615]

First time, found your vlogs. Subscribed. Love your presentation and energy. Thank you 😊

[@AmericanViscountess]

Thanks for subbing!

[@tiffanyi5645]

It’s really interesting to hear that you’ve develop hints of an English accent when you speak. Just found this channel and it’s fascinating that to basically live in a castle! Lol

[@janiekrig5232]

How stuck up can you possibly get! Yuk.

[@tiffanyi5645]

I need more from this comment…who do you think is stuck up and why???

[@katiem6773]

I love wearing a hat and have a smart straw one that I wear everyday in summer. I love your videos Julie, thanks for doing them. My mom always taught me the etiquette of how to eat a hard boiled egg. You tap the top with the bottom of a spoon and lift off the lid this creates and them spoon out the egg and eat it. It took me some time but I got it and think of her every time I eat an hard boiled egg. 🥰

[@srkh8966]

That’s now how you eat a hard boiled egg-you mean a soft boiled egg

[@TheVitzy]

@@srkh8966 yes that is exactly how I was taught to eat a soft boiled egg by my mum too!

[@lisabrookbank5675]

Fun to watch. Thank you. One time this American wore a hat to an American wedding in the 1990s.

[@VashtiInez]

Hello Julie! I'm a new subscriber here, and really am enjoying the channel! I do wonder if your husband's family is related to Lord Montagu, Fourth Baron Montagu of Beaulieu? Also another question on using the correct address to a person such as Sarah, Duchess of York, who is no longer an HRH (royal Duchess). Usually non royal Duchesses are addressed as Ma'am or Your Grace. I've never been able to clarify this point. Can you enlighten one?

[@elizabethr-steenberg3711]

I can never find the right size of hat... I literary have a big head! Thank you for the interesting details. I stumbled onto your channel and is definetely a fan!!

[@ClareDreyer]

I just found your channel! I subscribed and sent it to my husband. We would love to travel to England and explore historical mansions. I heard you also have other channels. I will check them out too!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Welcome aboard!

[@lubazak636]

I only wear hats in the summer sun. I did wear a hat to my wedding, which was small and casual but I wore a white suit, embroidered with white flower pattern. I did go to a milliner, right before she retired. She made a copy of a hat she saw being sold at Neiman Marcus. It was tear drop shaped with the point toward me face. It was covered with white opalescent sequins and had a halfway down my face open work netting which was wrapped in an intricate bow in the back. It was very lovely.

[@tinamargherio6701]

I love the videos and you seem to have so much fun making them. My dream is to have an AGA cooker! I’ve wanted one since I saw my first at 7 years old. I’ve worn a hat a couple times and have always felt a bit silly. Although I like them and think they’re cute on others, I don’t think they look good on me and I’m always self conscious about them. You asked about a faux pas introducing someone and I sure have. I was at a podium introducing many people where were escorted up and after a while I was tongue tied. As I got to one of the highest ranked people in the room, I did not stumble on the title, but her name. Her first name was Tess. Unfortunately, I embarrassed myself terribly by saying Pest! She handled it with great grace, had a little laugh and said she’d been called far worse. Possibly she had been, but I doubt ever in an introduction! I’m not know to lose composure, but I must have turned the brightest shade of red possible. Writing this 35 years later, I’m still not sure if I should laugh or cry!! She really was lovely- definitely not a pest at all.

[@corinnecowper1339]

No hats! I live in Australia and have several hats. Nothing to do with etiquette but everything to do with being in the sun. Couldn't live without my hats. We use English etiquette at the table - we have an American in law who just doesn't get it much to our amusement. Hospital corners - I use those every day. Absolutely hate not having tidy corners on my bed. Must be a huge culture shock to live in starchy England. It's wonderful to have you sharing all of these little bits with us. Thank you.

[@corinneburque]

I haven’t seen you in so long.. I am so happy I found you again!!! I’ve missed you. Such a great video and channel!

[@chriskberks5471]

I just found your videos. Hugely enjoyable, thank you

[@marymarymillidweeb2661]

I was also taught you should not use the salt first if someone has asked for it - even if you were just about to use it yourself. You must pass it along then ask whoever has it to "pass the salt please". One tip for wearing hats, have a look at some pictures of Diana Princess of Wales, her hats are often worn down on the forehead closer to her eyebrows. Unless it's a brimless hat. Obviously there are exceptions. Thank you so much for sharing bits of your life, it's absolutely fascinating for us on the "outside"!

[@ritamailheau771]

So much fun. Love this! Bless you

[@dorishawley2015]

I just ran across your channel.I was a big fan of the show that you did with other English ladies.Cant wait to get right into this channel.Thank You.

[@alexanderchenf1]

The passing salt bit is so stupid at first glance. Then I realize there are usually huge vases of flowers on the middle of the table.

[@teresaproano7984]

I really appreciate and admire your style.. in looking at old photos with your blond hair, I think you look more beautiful with your original hair color, and all the wonderful clothing you wear from your vests and slacks, to your amazing dresses from various decades.. thank you for being you and sharing your uniqueness.

[@justsewit_tk5477]

I wear hats all the time in the summer simply because it's unwise not to in our Australian heat. My eldest daughter had a boater hat for school. I've never had to wear a fancy hat though, just a sunhat. These videos are just so fascinating to watch. Thankyou for showing us snippets of your experiences.

[@brigitgoddess]

I LOVE hats! I just stumbled on your channel--I subscribed--and will check out your other videos--this was fun.

[@apgx6032]

At least we have Meghan to thank for something, her arrival in the UK helped launch the already resident American Viscountess to the wider public. It’s very enjoyable listening to all the interesting stories the Viscountess shares. I never realised our uk table etiquette was so difficult to learn. I have to confess to a few faux pas when I’ve been abroad. One was when in a restaurant I couldn’t get my thoughts around how after sucking the meat of small bones one just piled the bones up on the table and most definitely not on a side plate. Not that one had a side plate 😂. But it gave my hosts and her another guests a laugh when I hid them under other food on my plate.

[@longwaytotipperary]

Would love to see more videos with you and your husband (the two of you are very funny together) and more about your house in Italy.

[@AmericanViscountess]

More to come!

[@longwaytotipperary]

@@AmericanViscountess Wonderful!

[@be6715]

I don't know how much is scripted and how much is real, but the married couple bickering is very funny. The reaction to Luke wanting to put a banana in the smoothy - and then your not allowing him to have any more than one sip was very funny!

[@milliehicks7436]

This was very interesting! Looking forward to seeing more videos!

[@AmericanViscountess]

More to come!

[@shelleyjohnson1546]

We lived on the 3rd floor of a manor house in Berkshire. The landlords were having a dinner, then fancy dress party afterward, to which we were invited. They told us 8pm, so being the proper military family, we showed up promptly at 8. They were still seated at dinner. We were quite embarrassed. 🤭

[@anna_m59]

Julie, can you make more videos when you go to Italy back. I promoted your Chanel on expats in Italy on FB. I find very informative those videos and useful! Thank you and Happy Holidays to you and your family from California.( soon from Italy)

[@AmericanViscountess]

Yes of course! And thank you! I just need to get back there and due to covid 5th wave it's proving difficult but hopefully back in January where I can film a lot!

[@DeneeMUA]

So excited about finding your channel. I am obsessed with Downton Abbey and any time period drama similar to it. I find it all so fascinating! There is a restaurant in Disney Springs in FL that says Earl of Sandwich on it, any relation to it? Or maybe they got it from the same historical facts!

[@hangin-in-thereawesome4245]

Do you ever cook any American dishes? Yes I've worn hats to church but every thing in the states has become so lax that etiquette is a mystery to most people. They don't know what white gloves are for! I enjoy your videos, glad that you haven't lost your American accent!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Hi and thanks! Yes I cook AMERICAN dishes all the time. X

[@mynamename5172]

@@AmericanViscountess What American dishes do you like to prepare? I am a foodie and immigrant to the US and love learning the various cuisines traditional to the regions of the country (beyond McDonalds), opinions among Americans can really differ on this point!

[@thetriadbroker]

i just stumbled upon your channel. I can't wait to watch all of your content.

[@AmericanViscountess]

Welcome aboard!

[@annburge291]

The passing of the salt was a new one for me. It makes it seem like the table is a mile wide. Are you allowed to help yourself as the salt is passed? I also laughed when you said "wearing a hat", not just having some brimmed thing on your head as sun protection, or something woollen to not freeze, but "wear a hat", that historic masterpiece stored in a fancy hat box, worn on special occasions.

[@mellie4174]

No you can never do that!

[@nunyabiznez6381]

"pass the butter" and "pass the salt" isn't a thing at my table. This is because everyone gets a small dish called a "butter pat" with a heap of butter on it and everyone gets their own salt and pepper shakers. I inherited a set of 24 miniature silver and crystal salt & pepper shakers. As I understand it, with a large formal dinner that's the way it's done anyways. As for table setting, you look at your menu and the order that you are serving and just make sure you have cutlery for each course and as each course is removed the cutlery goes with it. So if you start with soup, then follow that with a main course of steak and vegetables and finish with cake for desert then you would have a dinner fork, desert fork, knife for the steak (unless it's formal in which case the steak is pre cut) and a soup spoon. If tea is served then you would include a tea spoon and if formal a lemon fork as lemon wedges would be included at some point. So when you are finished with the soup you place your soup spoon in the soup bowl or if there is an under plate place it there and that is removed together. When you finish your main course you place your dinner fork, steak knife on the plate and that is removed and so on. Some of these practices assume there is someone serving which would be the case with a formal dinner. At home with an informal dinner usually the hostess or host removes and serves. I have a tiny cottage and my living room doubles as my dining room. The table is barely large enough for four people and I remove the TV from the TV table and use that as a buffet. When I have people over for dinner my goal is to come as close as possible to making them feel like royalty.

[@Whale_Lord1218]

I just found your channel for the first time and I LOVE it. ❤️

[@AmericanViscountess]

Thank you so much!

[@davidd33511]

Love this channel I discovered today! How very interesting! I look forward to hearing more of your stories. Thanks for sharing!

[@AmericanViscountess]

Welcome aboard!