Why Do I Got To Wait?

I’ve been working on a novel and personal film project called “Song of the Panopticon” - a science fiction mythology based on my clinical research of near-death experience patients.
In the story, Rokhaya and Xi'an lose their son Éadaoin to a mass shooting in Central Park. I wrote this song from their perspective decades later as they speak directly to him. The lyrics reflect their impatience and frustrations at the continued injustices of the world that contributed to his passing. They have dreams of him, imagine him today had he lived, and try to find some way to move forward with their grief.
.....................
• Lyrics, music, video and audio post-production by Virgil Wong
• Vocals by Ian Bentley
• Verse melody from Radiohead's "Creep" (non-commercial use)
• Creative Commons licensed samples from Pt. Bhimsen Joshi's "Raag Malkauns" (1966) and N.A.S.A. deep-space sonifications of synchrotron radiation, infrared, and x-ray emissions data
• Drone footage at 3:07 - 3:39 shot by Virgil Wong with a DJI Mavic Air 2
• Additional footage and audio licensed from Storyblocks and Envato Elements
#mementomori #blacklivesmatter #stopasianhate #bereavement
.....................
You're like a drop in blue waters
Once the dream leaves my eyes
You were just in my mind now
But long gone from our lives
Just a ghost in old memories
The sun gone from our skies
I wish I could've done something
Wish I could've turned back the tide
Why do I gotta wait
For justice to be done
For the world to turn again
For our hearts to bleed as one
Why do I gotta wait
For the pain to let me breathe
For the billions of souls in them
To finally find some peace
Why do I gotta wait?
You're like a tree cut in one-fourth
The rings show us the past
The empty air surrounds us
The future didn't last
I see the versions of you old
Had you lived all this time
All the lives made better
Had you been by our side
Why do I gotta wait
For justice to be done
For the world to turn again
For our hearts to bleed as one
Why do I gotta wait
For the pain to let me breathe
For the billions of souls in him
To finally find some peace
Why do I gotta wait?
Knowing we will all die
So we'll finally start living
To let go of needing
Save ourselves by forgiving
All we have is each other
And the rock we're living on
Spinning out into deep space
A universe of one
I don't need to wait
For justice to be done
For the world to turn again
For our hearts to bleed as one
I don't have to wait
For the pain to let me breathe
For the billions of souls in him
To finally find some peace
My life won't yet abate.