Why Henry VIII's Codpiece Is So...Monumental

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SOURCES
Ganz, Paul. “Henry VIII and His Court Painter, Hans Holbein.” The Burlington Magazine for Connoisseurs, vol. 63, no. 367, 1933, pp. 146-144. JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/865525. Accessed 30 Sept. 2023.
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ukne...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portrai...
royalcentral.co.uk/interests/...
www.independent.co.uk/news/uk...
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The Nerdwriter is a series of video essays about art, culture, politics, philosophy and more.

[@JamesMorfa]

Having seen this painting in Liverpool, I can safely say that it is a big painting, and the codpiece is at face level.

[@ellendallanora7404]

Goddanm

[@lifethroughthecamera8531]

"watch a video essay about a royal codpiece" was not on my 2023 bingo card. This was fascinating.

[@MinorCirrus]

This portrait has been a source of fascination in my family for years because that face is the spitting image of my father. Really, to an uncanny level.

[@purpurina5663]

😮

[@starbird14]

How interesting. Maybe Henry finally had an heir.

[@MinorCirrus]

@@starbird14 Lol I wish. We're just a run-of-the-mill French working class family.

[@dreiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii]

you guys should get him a codpiece!!

[@MinorCirrus]

@@dreiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiAlas, his only similarity with Henry VIII is their being dead.

[@rossrreyes]

‘Is that your Cod sir or are you just really glad to see me?’

[@onemorechris]

it’s strange how much we know about something from so long ago. The Tower of London, where most of Henry’s wives were executed, was already twice the current age of the United States by the time they were loosing their heads

[@kaengurus.sind.genossen]

"most"? He had two of them executed, so it's either all of them or just one.

[@tenns]

for you americans 50 years ago is a lot, for anyone else it's a blip in time. The walls of my town are in engravings from the 12th century, and still stand today. I just saw the other day a painting of a tree on a nearby island, from 200 years ago. Buildings can last a thousand years, well maybe not your wood cabins.

[@onemorechris]

@@kaengurus.sind.genossen i did voice to text and said it differently to how i was thinking it lol

[@onemorechris]

@@tenns i’m not american

[@tenns]

@@onemorechris then why are you surprised ? just go outside and touch some walls my dude

[@armelior4610]

Between the codpiece and the posture, I can't help but think about the Blackadder series that ridiculed both even if there wasn't any Henry VII in it, only his daughter

[@SteveGillow]

Any time you can integrate "Looney Toons" into a video, you gotta go for it.

[@_thk]

Timestamp?

[@ninjamitcherz]

@@_thk He might be referring to 3:40?

[@khalidalali186]

Yup, it’s Bugs Bunny alright.

[@pabloramos8664]

* Looney Tunes But I get it, that damn Mandela effect

[@angelcena759]

You should see the codpieces in the Tizian portraits of Henry's main rival, emperor Charles of Spain. That was 'power'!

[@fruitygarlic3601]

Absolutely worth it.

[@prajash3829]

This video is weirdly about modern masculinity. The front image is something but the back image is something else. Deception is at play, but it works, cause you can craft an image and people will fall for it. Good stuff Evan, you know your stuff too well.

[@lyonspell]

So big codpiece paintings were the big SUV cars from nowadays...

[@rachel_rexxx]

I know I *should* associate Henry VIII with that portrait, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't peak Jonathan Rhys-Meyers that I actually associate with him

[@Sweetyhide]

Henry Cavill for me

[@peterDcontact]

i don't know why the phrase this "this is tomato sauce" made me laugh but it did

[@ahobimo732]

The more you learn about Henry VIII, the less you will like him.

[@magicknight13]

Lol!!!! So true

[@DSAhmed]

The Nerd never disappoints. Are we gonna get a second book from you at some point?

[@plica06]

He's not going to answer you. Evan never interacts with his viewers.

[@DSAhmed]

@@plica06 i don't blame him. Its too much and in today's social media, maybe too risky. But his book was good, and I'd like another.

[@clickityclackity7096]

You are one of my favorite video creators and one of very few where I have all the bells turned on for... Yet I never get recommended your videos. I have to search you every few months only to see all the videos I've missed. (sigh) The good news is, I have several new videos to binge! 😁

[@NLNShootTheShit]

Absolutely love the subjects you select for your videos. It is incredible to be able to take a peek at an overlooked detail of an otherwise well known piece of history. Makes one wonder if with the physical media production declining, will the future generations that are as far from us as we are from Henry VIII's will be able to recover this much knowledge or if the "web" will collapse and all data will be lost forever.

[@tommyb.a.354]

Loving the new editing style!! keep it up!!

[@kateeastland3328]

You really hit it out of the park with this video!!

[@sobeso]

It always goes back to the COD-piece

[@onil1325ms]

Love ya, Nerdwriter! Please make more horror-focused essays. I love your approach to those. Love this one too.

[@m1xedp1ckle]

Freaking ripped the man to shreds towards the end there lmao

[@SrStevenRice]

I got confused with the fact that the original painting was destroyed and copies were then made. So the one in the video was a recreation? Maybe using surviving drafts?

[@raphaferrari7361]

A real and royal History class👏👏👏👏 Congratulations, and thanks a lot!

[@ThatButchBitch]

Wow, I could genuinely listen to you for hours

[@yourma7055]

3:56 man wtf this works so well

[@bradhenaire180]

There is a copy at Petworth house. It's amazing up close

[@michaelf8221]

You know what they say about kings with large codpieces.... large feet!

[@thecryingsoul]

You sure do know your feet huh

[@itsmeprasad1987]

Isnt it the reverse

[@har5814]

It's not true 😂

[@watchaddicts1213]

Hi. Well done as always! I’ve followed along since the day you released your commentary on Dylan’s All Along the Watchtower. Q: if one leaves SquareSpace, does one own his data/content or is it the property of SquareSpace? Thanks

[@kenster8270]

Henry was packing a lot of cod 🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟😏

[@magicknight13]

Thank you for these videos!! Love me some art history 😊😊😊😊

[@davidgrunstra3680]

This was really well done!

[@fabiana_barros]

The truth is that he was almost certainly infertile himself

[@RobespierreThePoof]

The truth is that Henry VIII's fertility is something we can only speculate about. There is literally no way that can be researched at this point. It is a possibility. Its also possible that he had extraordinarily bad luck with the male heir thing. Or that he simply had wacky ideas about how much one needs to have intercourse to secure a pregnancy. (You can find some devout Christians even today who still think "once is enough".) We shall never really know.

[@yahyakahya5326]

He did have a son fron that third wife

[@fabiana_barros]

@@RobespierreThePoof taking into consideration the sheer number of spouses, mathematic and genetic probability both are strong indicators ..

[@sophiejones3554]

He wasn't infertile, it's just that he was only having daughters. This was a constant problem in the Tudor dynasty: and in the Lancastrian family before them. Catherine of Aragon was also screwed by genetics: her parents also had no male heir, despite PLENTY of trying. Anne Boleyn might have had a son if Henry had let her live long enough, but she was power hungry and smelled blood so he kind of had to get rid of her. Jane Seymour did have a son, not too long after this picture. Unfortunately, he was sickly and Lady Seymour was wildly unpopular. Anne of Cleves probably did nothing wrong, but by this point Henry's mental state was seriously deterioriating so he was ordering his wives executed instead of actually fixing his problems. Eventually, his son Edward did survive to adulthood and take the throne, but he died after only a few years. Then it was Mary's turn, Henry's daughter by Catherine of Aragon. She decided to try and return England to the Vatican...but by this point the English reformation was beyond the monarch's control. This was a problem for Mary, because this Reformation was increasingly anti-monarchical. So yeah... that's why she is known as Bloody Mary. Then she died under somewhat mysterious circumstances, possibly contrived by her younger half-sister Elizabeth: who then took the throne.

[@dragonmartijn]

England should never have had queens, but pass the crown over on males only.

[@KevinMakins]

Evan always hits the mark. Even when he's aiming at... codfish?

[@nimayravi9162]

Can you please make a video analyzing Tron! Also some of easter eggs in it, and the history of the making of the movie and how it came to be a cult classic. Then maybe how that led to Tron Legacy?

That last comment made me spit tea 😂 What a great video 👍🏻

[@remysimon6819]

Thank you. Very knowledgeable👍

[@sharifferdousarko3694]

And he is back. Nice to see that the frequency increasing soon.

[@jordan22031991]

I have been your fan for years but I really want to read your book but do not have the money to buy it. but someday I will.

[@kienesel7]

Ye olde Instagram filters.

[@waywardmind]

T R I P L E D I C K

[@starbird14]

😂

[@TyTyMcGinty]

I'm BEHOLDING! I can't behold any further!

[@Schmidtelpunkt]

I guess it would have been too hard to get a whole SUV on the canvas.

[@cannedpeachez]

Oh yeah buddy, I see that little clip of Wolf Hall in there. Give Hilary some credit; she's at least half of how you and I see Henry.

[@Stanzaawashere]

1:31 IS THAT TOM FUCKING HOLLAND?

[@har5814]

Yes

[@nestorperez6867]

It was the dramatization of his accident for me lol😂❤

[@user-hq6tk8sc4r]

Beautiful

[@pigeonheadedman5225]

saw this in liverpool the day before this video. What a coincidence

[@camaradiop3731]

3:12 All pomp and NO PHALLUS...

[@floodo1]

I love you for this

[@Wooster77]

DJT probably has a similar portrait of himself at Maralago.

[@charmedprince]

DJT is King.

[@NicitoStaAna]

Living rent free in your head

[@imveryangryitsnotbutter]

@@charmedprince Wasn't the whole point of founding the U.S. to put an end to kings? Why are conservatives trying to make that a thing again?

[@NicitoStaAna]

Not a DJT supporter. But do you ever get tired of political jokes? Especially the ones who peaked like 4 years ago? This is the equivalent of posting a harlem shake video thinking they'll get 1k views

[@a.a9021]

@@NicitoStaAna You think Trump is as irrelevant as the harlem shake? He's literally the GOP front runner for president

[@BarnibusInk]

Fight ED with TD

[@RobespierreThePoof]

I really think the codpiece should be revived in male fashion

[@jacksonjames2712]

It’s now called grey sweatpants 😅

[@tracik1277]

@@jacksonjames2712only when they are pulled halfway down your arse

[@har5814]

It's in the cycling shorts now😂

[@sarararah18]

little Henry

[@corlissmedia2.0]

I wanted you to relate this content to the current day, and another "king" who spends so much time compensating. Alas, you doth not provide, Great Sir.

[@Headhunter_212]

Did H VIII refer to the resident of the codpiece as The Sovereign?.

[@RawWrtochi19]

Was that Spider-Man in Anne’s decapitation ?

[@iluvbvdk]

WELCOME TO THE SHOW TO THE HISTOREMIX

[@courtneyhayes8394]

Switching up the flow as we add the prefix

[@derekbrou]

I can't feed my family with a cod piece!

[@anasmatic]

CR7 free kick posture.

[@WalterGalindo]

You forgot to mention his calves, his legendary magnificent calves

[@har5814]

Fat men have large handsome calves.

[@fleetkidn]

Varalaru mukkiyam amaicharey!

[@Eva9000]

They should make one for Harry. And make it blue.

[@auntvesuvi3872]

Thanks, Evan! 👑 #Nerdwriter1 #TheNerdwriter #EvanPuschak #HenryVIII #Codpiece

[@esterhudson5104]

I don’t know. Particularly as it fired blanks.

[@ezgregory7794]

What a title

[@tarek_maza]

The way he shape the world and history, is the ultimate statement of how powerful he was, not a painting

[@Rickbearcat]

Is it possible that Henry himself was sterile and not his wives?

[@alexeyleontyev9341]

He eventually had a son with Jane Seymour (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_VI), and as far as I am aware there is no evidence of adultery on her side

[@amigos4erin]

He sired at least two daughters, Mary (“Bloody Mary”) with his first wife, and Elizabeth (Queen Elizabeth I) with Anne Boleyn, plus Edward with Jane Seymour. First wife Catherine also had many miscarriages and was never accused of adultery, or he could have gotten rid of her much easier.

[@Rickbearcat]

@@amigos4erin...Thank you for the information!

[@hukares5363]

King had a piece on him.

[@SheldonT.]

Looks like he has a cold sore.

[@Plaine9]

My codpiece is large out of necessity

[@UndeadKIRA]

Seems like you are compensating for your others lacks in life

[@Plaine9]

@@UndeadKIRA like a personality

[@ashleyb7335]

The last word explains the whole thing - Compensating.

[@SK28th]

❤

[@dizmix]

Hog hood, as one would have it.

[@kaulis6524]

This was the only thing i learnt in history

[@daskritterhaus5491]

a lot of the ladies must have been seriously disappointed when the piece came off ha ha ha

[@remysimon6819]

Thank you🤣😂😅😆

[@ryan-heath]

Why is it called codpiece and not coçkpiece? 😅

[@baishihua]

For real, as a foreigner who only heard this word at first, for a duration of time longer than I am willing to admit, I thought it is call "cockpiece" and said to myself wow that's really provocative.

[@onemorechris]

cod, comes to the middle English word for scrotum. so in the 1500s it was as aggressive as you were hearing it :)

[@ishathakor]

it was. it meant cockpiece at the time. the use of cock as penis didn't really start for about another 100 years.

[@mauradlayouni3080]

Where is the turkey leg I always thought he was holding a turkey leg.

[@manueldifranco3519]

I knew it! 😂

[@luislozano6073]

what's wrong with the lip?

[@anaabendroth3460]

Overcompensation?

[@RoyGao]

Once again going frame by frame to steal some editing tricks. The codpiece is a little distracting

[@98loud]

Average englishman with power:

[@aria5614]

The fact that it was kept in his rooms and not for the public shows its less propaganda and more a royal photoshop

[@fruitygarlic3601]

It's important to remember that a royal's 'private' chambers meant a very different thing than it might to us today. People were moving about. Yes, there was something he wanted to prove to himself, but other people saw the work and would have gotten the message.

[@robmann400]

...codpensating.

[@antoinepetrov]

Because he was insecure

[@SlowDIIV]

5:26

[@j.prt.979]

Lol

[@tae_516]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Whyiseverythingthesame]

Isn't it interesting how the weakest of men put out the strongest propaganda?

[@doginsuit42]

woo, first!

[@dai6646]

First 😎

[@171QA]

Uh-huh.

[@nathanielhurley3960]

I don't like cod. I'd perfer a tuna piece or a shark piece.

[@urIauber]

is this the right way to pronounce fertility??

[@mattyoungau]

I’ve seen bigger

[@michaelkrieck4850]

Sure glad we don’t have leaders like that anymore

[@Scotialives1]

Tell heels vs baby face he isn't the messiah

[@embracethesuck1041]

Who else had elephantitus?

[@anupshrestha3032]

Did he finally had son 🤔

[@chairshoe81]

this is just a pic of louie ck cant fool me