Why I DON'T tell people I live in France!

When I was back home in the USA last year, my feelings about one aspect of the living abroad experience surfaced again. The longer I live abroad in France, the more uneasy I feel about telling people from back home that I live in France. Let me explain why. I hope you'll watch the whole video and won't jump to conclusions based on my intro. Maybe you can relate?
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Salut! I'm Diane, an American who has lived in France since 2012 and the creator of the blog/KZbin channel Oui In France. My channel's focus is "Everyday French life and beyond." I make videos on French culture topics, France vs. US culture comparisons, food, travel, language, and give you my thoughts about what it's like living in France as an American in the Loire Valley. Thanks for being here and if you enjoy this sort of thing, please share with friends and subscribe!
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[@tbuxt3992]

As a dual citizen of France and the US, and starting to serve in the US military, the military tends to slip into conversation quite often. And it has been very frustrating just how often people will default to bashing the bravery and honor of France as a whole as well as the constituents of its military. All of which is particularly offensive and hurtful both considering that much is based on myth and propaganda, and the fact that many of my French ancestors fought and died on those fateful fields of strife.

[@jberlioz]

On n’éduque ni la chair à canon ni l’ouvrier, leurs lignes leur suffisent.

[@ommsterlitz1805]

It's classic ignorance and the english propaganda that slipped in american culture, for exemple if you want to know why the white flag is a sign of surrendering in english minds and their colonies it's because they fought the pure White flag of the Royal army of France for close to 800 years, France won the vast majority of the battles facing english and it is that white flag that made them continuously lose and surrender to France from their first Brexit kicked out of the continent after France won the hundred years war to the US war of independence where again the same white flag of France Royal army made them sign over and surrender. Then there is ww2, were ht illigitimate generals made a coup d'Etat and signed an armistice with Germany, yet France never surrendered, as the legitimate Government led by Charles De Gaulle was well and after France saved the entire british army at Dunkirk, they continued the fight in North Africa saving once again the british army at Bir Hakeim, not only this but France is the only nation that fought on every front of the war as they were the only allies allowed to fight in the eastern front with soviets with the famous Normandie-Niemen

[@nox8730]

I am not in the military, but i feel the same. Actually, i certainly feel infinitely worse than you about it. These mockeries towards all those who died fighting for my country are unsufferable, inexcusable, intolerable, and only nurture further and bottomless resentment and hatred towards the USA (which is something considering the bad opinion i had of this country ever since i was a kid). Plus, i don't want to hear any of their sh*tty cr*p about this considering how many civilians they have murdered for petty reasons over the years. 60 000 french. 2 000 000 vietnamese. 1 000 000 japanese. 100 000+ germans. And so on, and so forth. And this is not even considering how they whine about Vietnam all the time, when they lost less soldiers there in 8 years, than we or the germans did in the mere 6 weeks of the battle of France in 1940. The very battle the use as a reference to call us cowards. This country is a laughable cesspool. And i will keep my last comment for myself, because i don't want to offend you. Good luck with the so-called "YOUHESSE military".

[@adoptmeeverything]

Also dual US-French citizen who served in US military. You speak truth.

[@OlivierGaffuri-wc2dl]

Most Americans (or Brits) I have met who have cracked these surrender jokes don’t mean any harm. They don’t realize that to some of us it is the verbal equivalent of spitting on our forefathers’ grave. And it is all the more incomprehensible that when it comes to military history, France holds a black belt of some sort.

[@lesfreresdelaquote1176]

As a Frenchman, who lived for 5 years in Montréal and 1 year in Manchester, I can totally relate to your feelings. The most misleading question I have to answer is always: Was it better over there? And my answer is always the same. I had a great time everywhere I went, be it Montréal, Manchester, Paris or Marseilles. It is all a question of mindset. If you are ready to fully accept the experience, it will be great. On the other side, I met people who had a terrible time in Montréal. But they were looking for croissants in a place that had great muffins. Living abroad only brings joy if you come with an open mind and a desire for new things. It does not mean that you hated your country of birth and moved abroad as a way to escape. It was not my case, and I'm pretty sure it is not your case.

[@afriendlyfaceinthecrowd]

I love the way you kindly phrased it, "...they are looking for croissants in a place that has great muffins..." In some ways I think that this describes the blindness of envy and a closed mind for many people in many situations, not only pertaining to living in another country 😊

[@lesfreresdelaquote1176]

@@afriendlyfaceinthecrowd 🙂

[@francedangela9556]

I might of said « …great bagels. » 😉

[@lesfreresdelaquote1176]

@@francedangela9556 Ah!!! Fresh bagels at 1AM on Saint-Viateur. Bagel + Salmon + Cream Cheese, the best way to survive one pichet too many... C'est si loin tout ça...

[@caciliawhy5195]

From Montreal and it is possible they didn't speak French well enough.

[@gregb4219]

Anyone living in a country they didn't grow up in, should be very proud. That's not an easy move to do; paper work, cultural differences, language. It's a lot of work not everyone can deal with.

[@HaroldHivart]

oui

[@brodee]

Hi Diane, I’m a Franco- Australian married to an American now living in France and I say screw those negative people. We moved here 2 years ago after living in china for a longtime. Moving to France was our only option at the time (considering the USA and Australia wouldn’t allow us to enter under Covid restrictions albeit we are citizens of those countries) and has been the best decision ever. We have had a lot of mixed reactions, from the flip side , lol. The French don’t get why we came here. We don’t live in Paris though, so that might have something to do with it. Living in France is very convivial for us and a very normal, western lifestyle. Not to mention, if you have a job you usually are entitled to full medical benefits. There are a lot of advantages to living in France such as security that you don’t get in other developed countries. I really agree with you that people project their insecurities and issues on to others. Ultimately, it is there problem. #complicated

[@tymanung6382]

The 2 of you may be interested in 1800s French woman novelist, circus performer, courtesan?.etc. nom de, plume, Celeste ""Mogador", who wrote at least 1.novel in French about her life + her French diplomat husband when in.Australia. Esperons que, cette, romance encore existe (--- t---il?) au'jourd'hui.

[@ZafWitness]

Wow, for someone that has lived in France for 2 (3?) years, you certainly don't make it easy on yourself ... 'The French'? Really? Have a job to be entitled to full medical benefits? That is really not an expression used by anyone from Australia or France? Strictly US, having 'benefits' (Not called or viewed as that elsewhere) are NOT related to having a job? security not found in other developed countries? (The entire EU has the same degree of security, actually most of the world have, just not the US) I don't know who you are, or where you are from? but the discrepancies in your post is down right glaring.🤥

[@miriamcohen7657]

I'm happy that you found Tom, and are making a wonderful life together. Soon enough you will find a new doggie. You are a dear person.

[@arthurbosch1460]

Bonjour, Diane. I moved from the United States 8 years ago to live in France. There are pros and cons, but I love my life in France. Thank you for this podcast.

[@CapitaineGMC]

Seconded, Diane! I'm now a French-British citizen and I still find myself explaining how living in the UK isn't a punishment (since the UK doesn't sound as dreamy as France), and how I'd never think twice if I had to do it again. A few years back, I told a friend that I was a bit tired of living in London and that I'd love to try a smaller city for a change. She was baffled: how could you ever be fed up with it? Well because I'm talking about everyday's life, I'm not talking about a weekend of fun as a tourist. We all have a warped image of foreign countries initially, which probably stems from what we see in movies and pop culture. We tend to focus on just a few highlights and we magnify them beyond recognition. But once you put these highlights back into the whole context, they don't stick out that much anymore. Of course they are differences, which you have to take in especially at first: things almost look like you're in an amusement park. Life in France may sound glamorous and fancy and chic and all, but after a while life in France - and anywhere else for that matter - is very much about the simplest things: getting up in the morning to go to work, shopping at your local supermarket, doing your laundry... Yes it's a beautiful country, a very diverse one too from one region to another, there are great things and not-so-great things there, which heavily depend on your personal story. But for sure, life in France isn't about catwalking along the Champs-Élysées all day long. As I always say: if you visited Paris, you visited Paris. Not France. But that's another story :)

[@FoxTrotteur]

I live in Paris, not born here but spend more time there that anywhere else. I always feel belittle when people say "Paris is not France." The same way people react weirdly for foreigners living abroad. When I go to another city, some people assume I'm smug or arrogant as soon as I have to mention I live in Paris. At the end of the day, sitting on a sofa late at night is the same in Paris than elsewhere. I don't understand why there is this kind of rejection. But Paris is France. And yes sometimes I walked with my friends on the Champs Elysées and it's as unglamorous as any other street in the world. France is not Paris but I'm tired of people pretending Paris is not France. I'm just another citizen.

[@tibomoltini2851]

@@FoxTrotteur dont worry, i'm french and i avoid Paris as much as i can. Paris is very nice (architecture shops events) but too crowded, too expensive. too stressing, with annoying transportation: cant drive there. (except eurodisney.. ) well 3/4 of parisians arent born in paris. There is a divide between Paris and the rest of France (2 different life styles) Cliché1: parisian intra muros stereotype , (the parisian way of life.) : dont own a car. center of the world . stuperficial conversations/social elevation?. . more active, better salaries, always running for and event? , use of the word 'province' vs Paris(=rest of the world or 3rd world in france) Cliché2: So the rest of france says Paris isnt France, they are rolling stones, gather no mass, people from the rest of france prefers quality of life/less stress/less commodities, more convenience/more down to earth/family things/countryside very near for activities)

[@mynewyork165]

I can totally relate! I've never lived abroad but I grew up in residential NJ & have been living in NYC since 1999. Everyone that I grew up with has this preconceived idea about how life in NYC is. They either think that I'm having the time of my life partying every day & night, that I live in a concrete jungle & don't enjoy the park or the beach, or I'm living scared because of the high crime. None of these things are true. When I moved, it was a life's decision that I'll never regret. In fact, moving here changed me because it opened my mind to seeing how other people different than me live. I'm a completely different person because of this decision. In fact, not only do I live here, but I work here. Not only that, but I'm a teacher so I'm making a difference in a community here that I care about. Had I not made my move from a place with people who are still very close-minded, I would probably not be doing what I do today.

[@laurawest8292]

Bonjour Diane, I had somewhat of the reverse experience. My French mother married my American father and whenever we'd go visit her brother (and my grandmother when she was still alive), my aunt assumed that we were wealthy because of my dad. She didn't realize that my dad made a modest salary, we never owned a new car, and my mom would save for over a year each time we traveled to France.

[@ilco8654]

You are a wise woman. Always learning from your videos.

[@OuiInFrance]

I appreciate that!

[@juliaorpheus]

Jealousy is a VERY UGLY thing. When you have something other people want (or something others perceive to be better than what they have) you instantly become the target of their insecurities, Girl! You're living the dream and I'm happy for you ❤

[@donaldshelton1720]

Just got back from France had a wonderful time people were nice very helpful kind.

[@Jehan-Descoteaux]

Glad you appreciated France, you are welcome anytime sir 👍🏼

[@jostock564]

I soooo loved your presentation. I've lived in France on and off for 13 years and identify with everything you said. I'm from Australia and the reactions are the same so I don't mention it anymore. My parent immigrated to Australia from Europe and I thought , easy, my parents did it so can I. But immigrating to another country is so difficult and it doesn't matter where you immigrated to. I take my hat off to anyone who immigrates to another country. As much as I love France, I call it "the French illusion".

[@a_dieu_toujours]

I’m Australian too and I miss home soooo much 😭 but I dare not say it because I should be ‘grateful’ to be living the movie fairytale eek! Haven’t been home in 1yr and honestly I want to move back… but questioning the pros & cons with my French husband… should’ve been more practical haha. Now when I’m depressed I just gorge on baguette and cheese and definitely not staying French thin (another illusion!)

[@janw03258]

Diane, thank you for being so real and down to earth!

[@OuiInFrance]

Thank YOU for watching ;-)))

[@Kitsambler]

In my experience, there is a segment of US population that regards any international travel as elitist, and any discussion of same, much less living abroad (ie, perpetually traveling) as bragging. So these people fell put-down and they get defensive. Their hostile reaction begins well before they have the opportunity to learn that life in France has its own set of difficulties.

[@OuiInFrance]

You're onto something there

[@canadagood]

Halfway through this video I realized that it isn't about "Why I DON'T tell PEOPLE I live in France!" but far more about "Why I DON'T tell AMERICANS that I live in France!". Americans are not the same people as 'tout le monde' everywhere else.

[@oceanreefer2626]

Well said Diane. You are very eloquent in explaining how you feel and have touched on some people's ignorance, particularly when dealing with people who haven't travelled. I'm off on another holiday to Paris next year hence how I found your You Tube videos. Thank you for sharing your experiences and tips. As you say, don't worry about what other people think.😃Salut!

[@roberttradd1224]

Thank you Dianne. So much to unbox here or maybe not. Please know i appreciate and watch your channel not because of where you live but because of your personal perspective on adapting to a different geographic location. Maybe the same pros and cons you would find anywhere. Spending the majority of my life living in the northeast United States ive always admired other cultures and specifically have a strong interest in the life of everyday ""regular "" French people. I try not to make assumptions. I would love to learn about life there but never had theeans to travel to France. Your channel and the fantastic way you present content on life in France has been a blessing to me. Thank you. I am dismayed to learn you have had to deal with such negativity and judgmental individuals. Please know that I believe many people share my respect and admiration of you. Its my hope that you will continue to produce these informative and valuable videos. My very best regards

[@debschroeder7637]

I love hearing about life in other countries. It is truly eye opening.

[@catherinekasiewicz8683]

I love your channel. My first visit to France wasn’t so positive but your channel has reopened my eyes and given me a new appreciation for French culture and France 🇫🇷 in general. Please keep up the good work 🥰

[@jilllusey7001]

Thanks for sharing. Well done.

[@Alienor15123]

Very true for me too! Living here is very different from visiting. And the reactions are difficult at times. Thanks four videos. I really appreciate them😘

[@-Vim-]

As a Frenchman living in Japan for more than a decade, I find your exposé very compelling and point on. Keep up the good work and good luck for your future. ;-)

[@buddyneher9359]

Thank you for this. I realized that there are countries I feel so negatively about (France is not one of them) that I would make judgemental assumptions about anyone I met and learned they are from, or live in, that country. So you've alerted me to my need to make some internal adjustments. Your content is always valuable - salut!

[@Simon-zb6fp]

Bonjour Diane. If wasn't something not done in France, I would give you a big hug now. My first reaction is more on the line of, "Oh really, which part of France," because I have some awareness that living in Paris is somewhat living in Brittany and living in a town is different is different to live in the country. So I don't know if you will pick up on my comment after so many months but I would love to hear more about different customs in different parts of France. Finally know that I love your channel. I confess that I have had to edit my comments to incorporate some of the graces in your videos. I have a friend who lives in France too and your channels helps us have a more engaging conversation. Salut!

[@OuiInFrance]

So glad you enjoy my channel and thanks for the video idea!

[@raychat2816]

I understand it’s been some time since this video is out, and I find myself agreeing with you 100%. I do however think you are specifically talking of American people’s view of hearing someone living in France 😊 As a Levantine who’s lived in multiple places in North America for a few years, later spent some time in France, and now living in my home country, a LOT of people’s impression comes from the media, and Hollywood is still selling people the American Dream, which really doesn’t help whenever I get into a conversation about where I lived , and why I am where I am today, and how I found a place I belong to … from that angle I totally agree with you on battling people’s views on things they don’t know. The grass will ALWAYS be greener on the other side of the fence, and I understood that the people most defensive about their views of certain nations and how people live in them, are the people who’ve never lived in more than one culture, the same people who might consider this or that far away land to contain the cure for ALL their fears and high hopes for a less unhappy life, and you can never win an argument with an ignorant person. People fail to realize that changing countries will do little more than changing shoes if one is not happy with one’s life. I love your T-shirt 😅😅 reminds me of a present I have once given to a French friend, it was a rock panel for their new aquarium on which is carved : “J m’en Fish !” 😊😊

[@AshleySORCI]

💯💯 you nailed it, Diane!

[@anicetcastel9393]

As a french person living in the US, let me tell you it is very difficult to speak about it when I am back in France... Or to explain people here why I moved out of France lol

[@GUITARTIME2024]

Let me guess. "How can you stand all the shootings you must see on a daily basis." How can you stand not having any healthcare." LOL. Europeans don't understand American complexity.

[@anicetcastel9393]

@@GUITARTIME2024 some of it yes. They also speak a lot about food. And I get similar comments from American asking me why I would ever consider leaving France when they would want to live there so much, sometimes even offended by my life choice as Diane says.

[@nedludd7622]

As an amerloque who moved to France long ago, I can easily explain to Americans why I left the US.

[@joseeallyn9950]

I am English but I have lived in Texas for many years(my husband found a job here). When I go back to Britain I get the Nationalistic cold shoulder. Customs people (often from nations who were a rarity when I lived there) are aggressive and rude. We have a little house in France (thank Goodness). It is a modest workman's house which we love, in a small country town near Limoges. If we had more money we could do much more to it, but the constant wrestle with ancient plumbing that springs all sorts of leaks, only when we have guests, a rez de chaussee that is less than glorious in spite of a new shower room is, I admit, off putting. However the house is lovely. I have learned that Americans want to leave as soon as they can but my British friends love it. I should say that one American, a very learned architect was found exploring the old fireplace and chimney which would have been where the spit cooking was done in the 17th century, with a level of enthusiasm that was heart warming! English and French family and friends love it..they are used to old houses and all their peculiarities. One guest, who insisted on leaving the next day, commented on our journey to Limoges airport actually said, in all seriousness, "what lovely views, who does the landscaping?" I did think quickly enough to say "God"! We cannot please everyone so take us as you find us, mind the uneven stairs that you are not used to, sorry about the unfinished bits, the mice make a hell of a row sometimes, the spiders are called "Harvesters and are afraid of you; and please see the beauty we see and the good food and wine we enjoy from Carrefour!

[@susandobbis]

Bonjour Diane. As always, your realistic and down to earth take on the experiences of an expat living in France are liberating. I believe the point of living anywhere is to strive to make the next day better than the last. Merci de partager ta sagesse! 🍷Voila pour vous!!

[@chrstopherblighton-sande2981]

I've not lived abroad but I can relate in some way to your experiences. I was born and raised in England but my family all come from Galicia in Spain, and when I was younger and people discovered that fact, I would then be exposed to all the assumptions and stereotypes that people had about Spain in general. The same happens a bit now, but thankfully the reactions today are mostly on the neutral side and sometimes they can also be the source of interest and conversation which is enjoyable. Where I have indeed struggled more is when people find out I'm gay, nowadays the responses are thankfully almost always neutral, that certainly wasn't always the case, but nevertheless people still have a tendency to make all sorts of assumptions as to what my life is like, what my values are, and what my interests or views are etc. It's uncomfortable noticing people make quite profound assumptions about you before they have even got to know you & instantly adjusting their interaction with you. Thank you for making this really interesting and thought-provoking video.

[@sandie157]

I get the same thing for being Catholic. 😉😊💖

[@mackjay1777]

I can identify to some extent. I lived in France only for one year, but it was life-changing. When I told people I had done this, I felt some judged me as showing off, especially when I mentioned the advantage of language immersion. A lot of Americans (not all!) have no interest in other languages or cultures. In some cases they can be defensive and dismissive about it. As you say, many have never even visited another country, let alone live there. They assume it's elitist to talk about living in France. I don't bring up having lived there unless it's relevant to conversation. Some are surprised and ask me about (that's rare though, even with positive reactions) and some talk about living in Italy or some other country. There is nothing whatsoever to be ashamed about living in France or anywhere you choose. What others think of you is beyond your control and it's best to assume they have some insecurity that makes them react negatively in this situation.

[@playlistmusiquederolf7104]

I totally agree with you. I really like your objective point of view in everything.

[@bluewaterstudio]

When I mention that I am moving to France, it is always met with "Why would you want to move to France?". I mentioned this to my very religious dentist the other day and I could tell he was disgusted with the notion, most likely having to do with Iraq, Socialism, and religious leanings - and he asked where in France? "Paris" I replied .. and he says with total disregard for my feelings "I hate Paris .. most terrible city I have ever visited". Sigh ....

[@danguid2753]

For him it is the loss of a customer!

[@OuiInFrance]

It's such a funny reaction, Daniel. Like OK Dentist Sir, then you probably shouldn't spend your time or money on going to Paris then. Case closed. Like people who leave comments telling me they hate my nail color. Ok then, don't paint your nails this color then! There are luckily other places (and nail colors) out there! hahaha

[@GasPipeJimmy]

Half the people that I have known that have visited Paris come away hating Paris, or Parisians. It almost strikes me as a direct analog for New York City. Many love it, many others hate it.

[@valerieneal2747]

My goodness...he was very rude to you. This is one of the reasons why people overseas have tagged us "Ugly Americans" because of the willful ignorance and arrogance of those who refuse to be more mature and respectful of others. How can one base a valid opinion of a country, especially if they have been there only once?

[@jetteramsey9292]

Love France!

[@BobKeefe]

I can relate. While traveling around the USA I no longer tell people “I’m from Chicago” because the news has given that a very negative connotation. Instead I say that I’m from Illinois. I guess people just automatically have assumptions about places they’ve never been to based upon movies & TV.

[@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi]

Chicago is a wonderful city 🌃

[@RB-zr9jt]

After I stopped living in the mid-West, my most recent visits back have convinced me that Chicago is a truly great city.

[@khaelamensha3624]

I am from France 1nd Chicago is one of the top 5 cities I wish to visit, city with a lot of history and its own mindset it seems, I like that 😁

[@judykraft3325]

Hi Diane, I personally am so happy you got the opportunity to live in France. I think it is wonderful. Learning about and living in a new culture is not simple.I admire you for learning a new language.French is not a simple language to learn and either is cultural etiquette. It all takes practice. Thanks for sharing your experiences of the French culture. I so glad you are happy living in France. Judy

[@OuiInFrance]

Thanks so much, Judy!

[@lindab2426]

Hi Diane. Great 👍🏻 video. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I can understand why you do not feel comfortable sharing where you live. At the same time, it’s a shame that there are so many narcissistic, immature, insensitive, disrespectful and downright jealous people out there who cannot be happy for someone else’s success and happiness. Keep up the great work 😊! 👍🏻❤️🇫🇷

[@darrylgray5023]

Diane, thank you so much for making these video's. You really help people understand the unknown. We visited France for the first time last May and had such a wonderful time and we didn't experience any of the negative things we thought we would encounter because of the negitive people you are talking about. We absolutely love France and look forward to our next trip. Thank you very much for helping us overcome misinformation and your enthusiasm is intoxicating.

[@michelelavender1967]

What a lovely well grounded human you are,just love you

[@LondonEE16]

I'm American and I lived in the UK for about a decade. I 100% get what you're saying. Sometimes people perceive another person's living abroad as a rejection of the US. Like "what's wrong with our country?" Also, since obtaining permission to stay in another country is so difficult (not everyone can marry their way into it) that envy becomes their reaction. I think many more people would love to live abroad (at least for a short time) if they could, but they can't, so that plays into their response. I also understand the living a regular life abroad vs the tourist experience. Although, I still felt living in London was special as every time I did something that I could not do in the US, it felt magical to me. Like seeing the world's best theatre on a regular basis. Or living amongst centuries old buildings. Always love your content Diane. I find it so relatable. And you're such a good presenter. Another great post!

[@roxpr2000]

Very interesting. It's very unfortunate that you've had rude reactions from people when they learn you live in France. I would add that there are people who for political reasons dislike Europe/Europeans. Never forget that freedom fries nonsense too. Thanks for sharing!

[@joseeallyn9950]

I was involed in a 'fire fight ' over the Freedom Fries silliness. I pointed out that a tiny town near my French house has a war memorial in the town square qhich had probably two hundred names on it...many more that the town now has living there. There were fwer men to fight for freedom after two world wars and a war in Indo China. So tragic , but it is the same story all over France. Also elderly ladies always tell one that "my son and his family went to live in Canada". Yes, the country towns in France are dying for want of children, take note, America, your children are more important than you know.

[@m64h]

“Freedom Fries” - the idiots who started that apparently were unaware that French fries originated in Belgium 🙄

[@hervedupont6955]

@@m64h 🤔vous ne savez pas que les frites sont bien originaires de FRANCE.

[@hervedupont6955]

N'aime pas l'Europe 😮 d'où viennent les Américains blancs🤔🤔

[@fynna8640]

​@@hervedupont6955Je dirais région Nord/Belgique. La bonne cuisine ne se préoccupe pas des frontières :)

[@paestum70]

Great video Diane!!! As always it was insightful, balanced, respectful and human. I also have been in France for 10 years and I have exactly the same experiences in the US... I also don't care anymore either. Now I kind of chuckle because people have their own stories in their heads. I think at least in terms of the US there has always been a very strong level of American exceptionalism (and gross ignorance) plus some derivative of the Anglo-French rivalry. Fast forward to the past 5 years and these notions are now on steroids. Flying into a major East coast airport just before Christmas last year I got (shocker) a rude and aggressive Customs Border Patrol officer. How long was I away? A year. A year? Yes, I live in France. He rolled his eyes. "What... is America not good enough for you?" To which I didn't answer. A battle would have been pointless. I simply responded "I am from here. I grew up here. My family is here and I am coming to see them for Christmas. It's been a tough 2 years. I have elderly parents. Merry Christmas." He literally threw my passport back at me in anger. At what? It was a pretty violent experience but what it showed me more was that it was his problem, his anger, his frustration. Wasn't the first time...nor will it be the last with angry people. But the genie has been let out of the bottle recently in the US and this kind of openly hostile, xenophobic behavior has become even more socially acceptable. Americans have a serious anger problem... Anyway thanks for this video... very astute and on target.

[@benjaminlamey3591]

Hi Diane, Living abroad gives people a more open mind. I am french living in germany (at the moment). Having seen a different way of living with different values and different way of doing things gives us the first reaction of curiosity, because we know there are things which are better and other which are not, and overall what we find good may not be what others find good. For example I like german bread ... Imagine how the french look at me ??? I also like french bread, but not in all occasions. France has a huge story telling, or at least Paris, but for outsider (and Parisians) Paris is France. As an expat, though, I have the feeling we went through things that usually gives us more confidence in our choice of life. we took the risk, we experienced it and we stayed because it fitted us. I lived in other countries before and did not stay there ...

[@sandyfeet1220]

You’re such a smart sweet person and I love your videos - thank you for expanding our world. It’s so interesting learning about different cultures!

[@OuiInFrance]

Thank you so much!

[@kjandtonylovefrance]

Bonjour, Diane. I LOVE this video! What you are saying is so true. I was so surprised to get the #3 reactions from people when I told them my husband and I are moving to France. I also relate to the 24/7 vacation mindset. My husband and I just moved here a week ago and although my husband is retired (for the most part), I am not. I am also someone who enjoys staying home curled up with my blanket, and am perfectly happy not having to leave the apartment all day long. My husband, however, is still in 24/7 vacation mindset at the moment, which I know will subside as we settle into every day life here (at least I hope so 😊). Your channel has been so helpful. I was practicing my Growl and Sighs yesterday to improve my french "r"... Merci 🤗🤗

[@psychic644]

Thank you, Diane, you spoke for me as well. I live in California and I go through the same thing. Because many people have left the state, I'm judged for political reasons. Ironically, this comes from people that haven't a clue about me. They don't know my political beliefs and personal life situation. They automatically assume them just because I'm here. It all boils down to ignorance and close-mindedness. It's a shame that people choose to live their lives in a box instead of seeking the real truth. Sending you much love and many blessings!

[@richardpodnar5039]

I agree with you 100%. I left California to move to a state where I could live more cheaply. I find that all the people who criticize Californians have never visited there and don't have the first idea how large and diverse it is.

[@psychic644]

@@richardpodnar5039 That's it exactly! They don't think for themselves. Their lives are lived through the opinions of others. That way of thinking is a breeding ground for ignorance. Ultimately, it can lead to insane behavior.

[@RaewynHerrell]

You have said it perfectly Diane. I’m glad you had the honesty and courage to do so. I think people’s attitude can stem from envy. You have the courage to do so something that they would love to do but would never do even if they had the opportunity. I have experienced something similar.

[@joyfullypacinglife8847]

I totally agree...some people think living in France is like winning a lottery and experiencing magical things. I live in France six months in a year, and while I love it here, I still deal with cooking, doing the laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, etc, just like living in San Francisco, CA where I live half the time in a year. It is living life just like everyone else!

[@lavachekikri]

Exactement! En Suède beaucoup de gens croient que j’ai vécu la dolce vita pendant mes années (15) en France; ça me fait rire et ça m’énerve à la fois.

[@Rachel-rs7jn]

Yes, I totally hear you. I also do the half-and-half and it's hard when people (a) just think you're on vacation the whole time and (b) think you just got lucky to have that life, and didn't have to work hard and sacrifice a lot for it.

[@zestylollipop]

I really appreciate you putting into words things that I've been feeling too! French is my second language, and it's been my goal for years to move there after I finish my PhD in the US (where it's actually much cheaper, at least in the hard sciences). But any time I tell someone that I'm looking for jobs in Europe, they think I'm being boujie or they think it's such a "romantic" idea. I don't blame them, but I was born in the UK, my family is all European, I've visited Europe a lot over the years, and after doing a 3-month study abroad in Strasbourg during undergrad where I lived with a local family, I already know that life anywhere in Europe is just life.

[@walideg5304]

Strasbourg is a lovely city. One of my favourite 😊

[@christophermiller8091]

Diane, thank you for this video. You absolutely nailed it. I absolutely love and appreciate your videos.❤ I am so glad someone is discussing a real difficult issue those of us who have lived abroad face. All i can say is 'All that glitters is not gold'.

[@monicarowe7915]

I thoroughly enjoy your videos, speaking from the heart. I enjoyed a road trip in Brittany a few years ago and look forward to visiting again. I think social media can distort the perceptions of the lives of others, and bring about insecurities and jealousy, but it is our own lives to live. I am from Bermuda, and from my own experiences, people want to know where I’m really from, and they act surprised that I was born and raised in Bermuda, a Caucasian with an American accent, but British to some. Do I sense some confusion, or perhaps insecurities, from some people? Yes, I do! Recently, I have been living in Mexico, and that can raise eyebrows. Some people might wonder how or why I would live in Mexico, Spain, or the USA and travel the world on my own, but it is the life I choose, at least for now, just like you chose beautiful France! ❤

[@buttercup6170]

Enjoying your videos😍

[@OuiInFrance]

Thank you! 🤗

[@mikhil6686]

Home is wherever you want it to be. I'm native American Indian living in Canada. I appreciate your opinions.

[@Jessica_P_Fields]

I live in Florida, and whoa nelly does that prompt some raised eyebrows and commentary, both within the US and abroad. I recently returned from my first visit to Europe (which included Paris), and I purposely tried to have a more "normal life"/less touristy experience during my travels. It was fun and I learned a lot! I found your channel while I was researching about visiting France, and I'm very glad I did! (I may or may not have visited a Monoprix during my visit to Paris due to inspiration from your videos 😉). I will say that I was not expecting to enjoy Paris nearly as much as I did, because I felt that it was so hyped up and idealized by so many Americans (especially those of us who took multiple years of high school or college level French language classes). While I don't try to contribute to this phenomenon myself, I will say that I genuinely love Paris as a city and the people there, and I look forward to future visits to other places in France. Personally, I can't imagine having a negative reaction about where someone lives (even if it's a place where I wouldn't necessarily choose to live myself). I like to hear about other people's experiences and perspectives. I've never had the opportunity to live abroad, but I can't/won't say that it will never happen for me. But yes, even living abroad, it's real life, right?! Otherwise it would be like the scene in "The Good Place" where everyone in the Good Place is jaded and miserable. Vacations are great, but that's not the be all and end all of things. Thank you for making your videos and sharing your real life experiences with us!

[@sparklie962]

Wow, I have to admit I'm a bit shocked to hear what sorts of judgements you've been subject to, but at the same time not surprised. Can't say I blame you for wanting to avoid totally unnecessary unpleasantness - life is hard enough without opening the door to more of it. I've got things I don't share either for the exact same reason. People can get quite defensive, as though my choices and experiences are somehow a judgement on their own. My philosophy is "you do you," so it always puzzles me why some people feel the need to react to some habit or choice of mine with a laundry list of reasons for why they can't do the same or why I'm mistaken in my preferences. So yeah, why go there?

[@michaelmedlinger6399]

Yes, I don’t get that. Now, I consider good wines and other alcoholic beverages to be among the great pleasures of life, but I never try to convince someone to have a glass of whatever, and if I am having guests who don’t drink, I ask them what I should purchase for them. But I have friends who will pressure others to “just have a glass of wine”. Strange - if someone doesn’t drink, that’s more for me!😂

[@jennyhammond9261]

Very interesting to hear your perspective! I'm an American living in Mexico. Opposite isn't quite the right word, but my experience has been almost the opposite. My family is the one that tends to make the assumptions, think negatively of it, not even ask questions, etc. and strangers or acquaintances are the ones that think it's neat or want to know more.

[@cynthiasutton]

I believe you are wonderful and I have the deepest respect for you ❤️

[@OuiInFrance]

You're too kind, thank you

[@brianpeterson2185]

I’m an American who has lived in France for the past 7+ years. I enjoy your videos. I work about 18 weeks/year in the USA (semi retired surgeon 😊). Overwhelmingly people are favorable about my choice to live in France. I do occasionally hear, “don’t you like the USA?” I answer, “of course!” This is just the best place for me right now! Thank you for your interesting videos😊

[@tricias1227]

I love all your videos and how real you are! I love how you always talk about the reality of life in France. Every video is so interesting and informative. On one of my trips to France, my husband and I were shopping in a shoe store in Nice. We were talking to the young gentleman who was helping us, and he asked us where we were from. We told him that we were from Los Angeles, CA. He thought that was the coolest thing and wanted to go to LA so badly. I thought that was funny. I have lived here my whole life (almost 50 years) and it’s interesting to see how others view my hometown.

[@JolieGaronne]

Couldn't agree more. We are about to move back to France (been living in the U.S for 20 years), and I'm now refraining myself from talking about it. SO MANY ASSUMPTIONS! People think you think you are better than them.

[@JD987abc]

Always good information. Love your posts. Be well. Joe and Gigi.

[@teriwittig2190]

Thank you so much for this, it’s glad to know I’m not alone. This point even after only a year I think “it must be nice. “has become a small trigger for me lol.

[@jamescusick9903]

Hi , Thank you for videos about living in France. I recently been offered a job in France and your insight into France life has been spot on.😊And don’t listen to the negative people they have nothing to say.

[@MichelleKoziel-fr8ik]

I completely understand. I lived in the south of France for almost 10 years. Some people in France would attack me about our politics even if I'd never met them before and knew nothing about me, so that was tough too. People are people and you can't please them all. Stay close to positive people, no matter where they come from and let the negativity and the people who bring it be on their way. 😘

[@calise8783]

I don’t live in France but another European country (for over 20 years now) and I can relate to all of this. I too never mention living abroad unless it fits the conversation.

[@TalentedDilittante]

Think you've had problems? I was born in USA, grew up in Saudi Arabia, high school in Italy and Switzerland, BA from Amercan University when I was 15, became Canadian on invitation to teach here, and have lived in 5 countries in So. America for the past 36 years . . . Talk about a conversation-stopper!

[@OuiInFrance]

Sounds like it would be a fascinating convo!!

[@TalentedDilittante]

@@OuiInFrance Yes--for someone unafraid, like you, like me. . . DIANNE, GET USED TO IT! Most of the people we meet find nothing in your life nor mine to relate to; they feel like hicks, comparing their lives to ours. Of course they're jealous, envious, resentful and knee-jerk, defensively critical.

[@gerardacronin334]

How do you answer the question “But where are you FROM?” I have lived in three countries and am a citizen of two, and I still have to think before answering that one.

[@TalentedDilittante]

@@gerardacronin334 Don't think! I usually immediately answer, "I was born in New York . . . sort of . . ." followed by "On a Canadian Air flight (since defunct) from Montréal to NYCity. So, my birth was registered at Bellvue Hospital, making me a US citizen, but because I was on a Canadian plane, I was also recognized as Canadian (I travel exclusively on a Canadian passport). . . . which is always met with silence, confusion, looks of askance, and those people never really become friends. I've twice tried to renounce my US citizenship, but to no avail. (What's with the U:S.--afraid to lose one citizen?) Anyway, start off with "I was born in . . ."

[@gerardacronin334]

@@TalentedDilittante Well, you certainly have an interesting origin story, being born in the air! As for difficulty in renouncing US citizenship, I think the US wants to tax you. Only the US and Eritrea tax people on the basis of citizenship. I am Irish-Canadian, have lived in Canada for over half my life, and travel on my Canadian passport. I used to bring my EU passport to Europe and return to Canada on my Canadian passport, but I got some strange reactions from immigration officers during flight connections, so these days I keep it simple. When people ask me where I’m from, if I am travelling outside Canada, I tell them I live in British Columbia, Canada. Most people accept that and if so I don’t offer any further information. If they ask me where I’m “really from” I tell them I was born in Ireland but have lived in Canada for many years.

[@andyshacks7812]

I’ve even had the same negative reactions from people I knew when I moved from the north of the city I live in to the south side ! People are strange sometimes. You’re right just go with it. Thanks Diane !

[@niniison]

Always articulate and describes the overseas experience well ! Thank you Diane.

[@OuiInFrance]

You are so welcome!

[@cmlazar]

I have never lived there full time but I have spent significant amounts of time in France starting when I was 15 with my adopted French family, going to university, and with my partner, a Frenchman. I’m now 81. I love it. It is better in many ways better than the US but it’s not perfect. No place is.

[@joegalant9006]

Thank you so much for your sharing, so enlightening! I am originally from Hong Kong. Most of my American colleagues reactly bizarrely when I tell them, year after year, that I live in Paris.

[@ivansmith654]

I am Franco-American I feel the same thing, but I can get from both sides! I had to tell my American father a Vietnam veteran sergeant and a hard-headed one at that who hates the French people, and he is old man, I can not change his mind! All I know is he hates that I am here of all the place I could, but France: this is something he does not deal with it well yes my mother is French, I was born in Paris but as a dual citizen because he was in the army, but his kid that is named after him is American! What he fails to understand is I am not French or American I am both or neither, but I am not just American, I know of no one in my shoes! Family on both sides of the world and I hated by both sides for being both as if this was my evil plan to get them both! I do have better things to do, like watch your channel, and it helps!

[@mariadaido6715]

My son is also french and american also born in Paris , after visiting Normandy he met many French people who love American Your dad has to get rid of his hate because it's going to make him sick, there are good and bad people no matter where you are in this planet , may God bless him and change his heart .

[@ybreton6593]

monsieur , j'arrive a l'automne de la ma vie , je supposes que vitre père déteste les français qu'il doit considérer comme des lâches , des peureux . mon grand-père a combattu en 1917 en quatre jours cette bataille a fait côté français 187 000 morts et 163000 blessés ! la guerre 14 18 un millions huit cents milles morts et disparus côtés français deux millions trois cents milles morts côtés allemands . lors de la guerre 1939-1945 ce sont les anglais qui ont été les premiers a déclarer la guerre à l'Allemagne Nazi après l'invasion de la Pologne suivi des français 15 jours plus tard en octobre 1939 les français passent a l'attaquent l'Allemagne dans le nord est de la France en trois jours ils sont à Cologne mais sous la préssion de la Russie des Etats Unies et des britanniques l'armées française est obligée de stopper l'avance et retourner en France . l'armée française avait 3 fronts a défendre le Sud -est de Nice a la Frontière Suisse , le Nords est toujours de Suisse jusqu'à la frontière du Luxembourg l'armée britannique le Nord Ouest avec les Français le 10 mai les allemands passent a l'attaque aux Pays-Bas et Belgique pays neutres . le 15 mai l'Amiral Ramsay prépare l'opération "dynamo" en faite l'évacuation de l'armées britannique entre Calais et Dunkerque . le 20 mai les anglais commencent a embarquer . contrairement aux idées reçu les Français ce battent avec acharnement et remportent des victoires las allemands ne sont jamais arriver en France la Fleurs aux fusils en 1 mois 120 000 soldats français sont tués et 96 000 allemands cotés britannique 4700 morts . dans le sud est l'armée française mette en déroute la coalitions : italiennes , autrichiennes et allemandes . a la frontière nord -est l'armée française tient tête aux allemands jusqu'au mois Août 1940 et se rendent sur ordre du nouveau gouvernement de maréchal Pétain ? dès 1940 la résistances française prends forme dans ma Famille mon Grand Père paternel est arrêtés par les nazis le 24 novembre 1942 après avoir été torturer , il es fusillé le 12 décembre 1942 ; mon père lui aussi résistant est arrêter le 3 avril 1943 torturer il est déporté au camp de concentration de Mauthausen en Autriche puis envoyé creuser un tunnel a la frontière Austro Yougoslavie au camp concentration de Loibl-Pass voilà concernant ma famille ! Effectivement le débarquement anglo américain a eu lieu en Normandie , mais en aucun cas les américains n'ont délivrés la France il sont remonter vers le nord et la Belgique . par contre l'aviation américaine a détruit les Villes françaises : Le havre , Caen , Saint Lô , Cherbourg , Saint Malo , Brest , Lorient , Saint Nazaire , faisant 96 000 morts femmes enfants vieillards hommes sans jamais réussirent à détruire les ports . + les viols des femmes françaises commis par les G'is . Pour rappel les américains voulaient annexer la France par plan A.M.G.O.T quand mon père est rentré en France il s'est engager dans l'armer française . il est parti en Indochine : Vietnam - Cambodge-Laos alors colonies françaises , que la chine voulais annexer . la guerre a durés de 1946 à 1955 en tout il a été 8 années a combattre au Vietnam et Laos les français et vietnamiens se battaient entre soldats . là la France a perdu l'Indochine ; ensuite les américains sont arriver au Vietnam avec leurs matériels sont aviation , le napalm , agent orange un puisant défoliants , pendant les vingts années de guerres les américains ont perdus mais laissant derrière eux un désastre . de 2008 à 2021 mon épouse et moi avons vécus au Vietnam et Laos , je travaillais pour une société française . même a cette époque les enfants naissaient avec des déformations , le cancer de la peau des poumons etc. font des ravages . mais le peuple américains le sait il . s'ait il que depuis 1942 l'Amérique déclare des guerres partout dans le monde . quand les français ont refuser d'aller en Irak les français riaient de la bêtise et l'ignorence et la bêtise des américains avec de le fameux Freedom Fries qui n'ont jamais été françaises

[@TravelUrsul]

I know what you mean about your Dad. My Dad is stuck on France’s political decisions during WWII which makes him dislike the country. I am chipping away at him though haha telling him all the great things about France. I hope in time he will start seeing the country as it is now and not it’s history because I hope to move there one day and my parents need to come with me.

[@davidcayla4552]

What most people don't get is that WWII came after WWI, you might dig a little into that and show your father.

[@chloemaxwell2628]

I am so tired of people being rude and thinking that is acceptable behaviour! Yes, they're unhappy with their own lives, and probably envious of yours, but that doesn't give them the right to be rude. And when KZbinrs have to tell people not to leave nasty comments, which they all seem to have to do now, that is a very sad and concerning state of affairs.

[@marcrodet4900]

Excellent points, and really to speak out about these issues

[@JamesYelverton]

and this is another reason we are going to look at properties in Vendee in november. I love to ask people where they are from and then "please tell me something about it, the food, the climate etc" you do great vids ty jimmy

[@OuiInFrance]

Glad you enjoy my content, thank you! And have a wonderful trip in November. Hope you find a good place ;-)

[@JamesYelverton]

@@OuiInFrance Got a cousin near Pouzauges, looks like I nice area. Like you video's, no matter where you go in the world, bring you manners and enjoy the culture. I grew up in limerick ireland and can't get enough of places and the people. its amazing how forgiving people are when you show respect and make the effort. jimmy

[@greenbankguy]

Thanks for your channel. We have been in our home in Pouzauges for a few months now and are so happy. Your episodes are great!

[@OuiInFrance]

Glad you like them! Merci

[@valerie-wy7xp]

Je n'aurais jamais cru ça en tant que Française ( merci à la traduction auto 😉 ). Je suis surprise et aurais tendance à penser le contraire, que les privilégiés vivent aux États-Unis, enfin bien sûr ça dépend. On idéalise souvent avant de connaître un pays qui nous semble mieux qu'il n'est par ce que l'on en montre de plus beau et cachant l'envers du décor 😊

[@valerie-wy7xp]

@@dalriada7554 Oui ,forcément et la réalité est quelquefois décevante 🙃😉

[@melodiousramblings8470]

I am currently in my « not mentioning France phase of life ». 😅. Even with my family it gets weird sometimes. But, moving here was the best choice I ever made

[@markjoseph5429]

18:05 hello dear, I am really enjoying your videos. I am an American living in France for 31 years also from New Jersey. I still feel that living in France is absolutely fantastic after all this time. Like you I am happy having overcome the struggles to live here. It’s true our everyday life is somewhat typical of life everywhere. However even after 31 years it’s still special and super charming. The architecture is magnificent and I’m not talking about Paris ! I live in Charente Maritime. I also have a small farmhouse near Saumur! Not far from you ! Yes, it certainly is complex dealing with both French and American people and their assumptions about Americans living abroad. Bye for now! 😊😊

[@OuiInFrance]

Thank you and welcome!

[@DJMusicPruductions]

Hi rather than saying “I don’t care what other people think…” saying “I don’t worry about what other people think ..”. Seems mote polite. Love you videos.

[@OuiInFrance]

Thanks!

[@ironked]

The reason I watch your videos is that It's fascinating.

[@J0HN_D03]

*French people are some of the most criticized persons in the World... but when I see how people act/react elsewhere !!!* 🤦🏼‍♂️ *We would never see people reacting like this in France*

[@clintonwright5052]

Great show Diane

[@OuiInFrance]

Glad you enjoyed the video!

[@michaelwhite2600]

I totally understand everything you said. For those with negative reactions, those aren’t the kind of people you’d ever associate yourself with because they are ignorant and probably in the cult. I love all of your videos. You are so wonderful and I’m definitely grateful we have you in the world! I’m definitely traveling to France in 2023! Thank goodness!! Thank you for everything Diane!! I love revisiting your grocery store videos! Now that the holidays are upon us, I’d love to see another festive Diane video! Always makes me happy! ❤️

[@tibomoltini2851]

while living abroad. i had 2 attitudes: 1 distraction: say quickly i'm french but i am here and i do this and that. (focus on active things) 2 avoidance: sometimes 1 out of a billion, would be conflictual with me just because of my nationality , so no point in arguing. (clichés+ignorance arent good) But it turned out sometimes, working with them or being part of activities, or inviting them with friends at home , they can quickly change their mind in less than 1 day!

[@rickpittington9152]

Love ya girl keep your info coming. Love your videos so much

[@OuiInFrance]

Thank you! Will do!

[@flatironnewyork]

I do the same thing - my early years were very international and I dodge the question when people ask where I grew up. If I tell the truth, their attitude kind of changes. I always then say I feel envious of people who grew up in one place as they have solid roots. It's the truth and it helps mitigate the situation :)

[@allensharond]

Hi Diane. I love France but I realize that it's real life when you live there. I haven't lived there (yet) but I have spent enough time there to realize it becomes everyday stuff like anywhere else. To have a little fun with snarky people, speak English with a French accent. You will be really snooty lol. Love your channel.

[@mariadaido6715]

We all live in the same planet so avoid small minded people and be happy with your friends with open minded ,

[@songsiliketosing9005]

I was 72 when I finally clicked into my groove, so to speak. I was in France, but I imagine that any foreign residency would have done as well. It's good to get out of one's comfort zone.

[@Hiker_who_Sews]

I enjoy your videos very much. Thank you! At work in the U.S. I applied for promotions, but my applications never even made it to the short list. Then one day I had customers from Haiti who spoke no English. A fit was thrown because the Haitians would only do business with a man. Supervisors were called, one of whom was actually French (and a man). Afterwards, the French supervisor told me the BIG boss called him in to verify my proficiency in French. and that he (top boss) was very impressed. The next promotion was mine, all because 30 years earlier I took high school French. It got me noticed, so that somebody finally looked at my permanent record (LOL) and saw my performance stats and reviews.

[@jimmyf6145]

Diane, my personal point of view: Who cares what others think of you. You live your life and people live their lives. If we are happy where we live, that’s good enough. Why compared others with ourselves? Please continue to live your happy life in France. As a Hong Kong Chinese, I have been to France for quite a few times and I must say: “j’adore la France, la culture et Les bouffes” !

[@susanableton8647]

Hi. Just found your channel. This topic interested me greatly. As a senior, I look back on my youth, where I studied French both in school and university. We moved to Canada from another country so while we had the shared North American lifestyle, it was different to come and live in another country. My wish was always to go to France because have always loved the language. Sadly was too timid to take a couple of the opportunities that came my way. As someone older I love reading and watching people like you who are curious about life outside of their own comfortable lifestyle. My dear never, never worry about people who make these snap, judgemental opinions. We in North America are incredibly narrow and tunnel minded in our view on life. It is a sad commentary that someone's knee jerk reaction is why are you living in a foreign land and not your own country. That's just ignorance.

[@t7147]

Bonjour Diane - if a sales clerk wants to sign you up for a credit card, just tell them you're going through a credit fraud investigation and there's a freeze on your credit. That usually stops the conversation immediately! 😉😉 Love your content and looking forward to the next episode.

[@jasonweikert1922]

What I have experinced living in France is that when something bad happens at home in the US. Even though I want to be there to help. I call all the time to check in. I get. "well your not here." What I have experienced living in France is that when something bad happens at home in the US. Even though I want to be there to help. I call all the time to check in. I get. "well, you’re not here." That hurts. Or people and family get mad when I am home, and I do see them while I am home. I come home to get away from life for a vacation and time to relax, not to be bombarded by everyone in my huge family. The plane does go both ways. Since I have been in France for 10 years now. No one at all from my family has come to visit me in France. It is frustrating. France is a great beautiful place to live. But yes it is real life just like anywhere else. I have also experienced the same thing, but the opposite way around. When people ask me where I am from here in France. A lot of them don’t understand Why move to France. Well my husband is French and 10 years ago US did not have marriage equality. It is truly that simple. Quite a few French hold the US up as a high standard. We all know that is not true

[@OuiInFrance]

I'm sorry to hear about the lack of support from family. That's really hard, especially the "well you aren't here" ❤️

[@marie-anneguibereau7344]

Bonsoir Diane, I'm French and I love your channel. I find it very interesting to learn how people from other countries see us. Sometimes it's really right on the money (e.g. yes, we complain a lot ! ) but sometimes the culture is so different that it gets difficult to get excactly what others perceive. For example, when you said that some Americans thought the wooden charcuterie board toy you offered to a kid was a snooty gift, it is so weird... As you know very well, in France charcuterie is not chic and fancy! It really is a working class snack,or pic-nic food . If you want to throw a trendy party or a formal diner in France, you won't serve charcuterie by any mean. Charcuterie, even the best kind, is not chic at all. It is delicious, we all have charcuterie but we woul never brag about it. It is just good everyday food, but not fancy. On the topic of "being proud" of living in France, I think you can be proud of living in any foreign country, be it France, Germany or Egypt. Learning a new language, a new culture, meeting different people is a great experience. But as you said, French people are just people, our lives are normal lives, and we don't all live in a fancy movie!

[@christianc9894]

Hélas les choses ne vont pas s'arranger. La daube Emilie in Paris diffusée par Netflix accentues les clichés et, comme si cela ne suffisait pas, en rajoute des faux.

[@fortheloveofchocolat]

Bonjour Diane. Love the shirt :) I hate telling people I'm going to visit my in-laws in France. They have this idea of the "once-in-a-lifetime" type trip and they think that's what we are doing every time we visit. People, I have done the touristy Paris thing ONE TIME!

[@OuiInFrance]

Yah, regular life is nothing like that! And thanks about the shirt. My shop is linked in the description ;-)

[@Stigtoes]

As someone from the UK, I find all these videos very interesting but the biggest beneficiary in this one is our host with this cathartic outpouring. OK, I think that I get it but really, 18 minutes. Objectively, 50% would have been better left on the cutting room floor. On the plus side, I’m sure that she felt better afterwards.

[@mgparis]

Very interesting video, as usual - I totally agree about generalisations, positive or negative. I'm French and when I lived in the US I lost count of people telling me "Oh, I've always wanted to visit there, but I hear French people are mean to Americans"... *eye roll* That is SO funny about the toy charcuterie board! You are right, there's nothing elistic about charcuterie, in fact it's the most basic, country food and super common, the epitome of "franchouillard"! :D Another thing I've always found funny across the 2 countries is how French female names are perceived - names like Nicole, Renée, Denise, Dominique used to be considered super sophisticated in the 80s/90s in the US, while in France they were already "typical grandma names". Similarly, the names Sophie, Isabelle and Natalie that have been popular more recently in the US, are the most common in France (think Lisa, Amy and Sarah for US equivalents), not posh or sophisticated in any way! PS - Nothing to do with the topic, but I always admire your flawless, glowing complexion :)

[@britt-sen]

💯, Diane. For me, I never liked to mention it in the beginning because negative or no reaction made me think i come off as bragging when its just matter of fact I live abroad. Or the assumption that I have a lot of money to do this. Ha! No one knows me or how long it took for me to feel above water in the new country. Its work. Its adjustment. Its life...going on! The judgement is weird. It seems so...people who give neg reactions may not be in their best place and you just have to let it go and just hope they feel better. But I enjoy where I live. So no matter...I feel more confident now than years ago answering the question.

[@marlonchristmas]

Bonjour Diane. I live in Florida but I have traveled a lot for business. I have visited France about 12 times in my life, including had a wonderful experience working for an American company at their production facilities in a northern suburb of Paris for 6 months. I totally get the negative reactions you mention. I have just spent 2 weeks on vacation at my friend's house in Normandy. I love your channel. The only comment I can add is that: haters are going to hate. Just ignore the ignorance and treasure your experience. ♥️♥️♥️. I can't wait to go back next July.

[@mib7623]

Hi Diane, I love your channel, I love learning about other cultures and how people live and especially how they eat!! My husband is Mexican so I understand a little of what you're speaking about. My children don't look like the stereotypical Mexican and so that can be annoying to explain that not all Mexicans have Indian ancestors. I wish you all the best, you and your husband are adorable.