Why Successful Women Struggle to Find Love

[@TealSwanOfficial]

👉 Get Your Free Relationship Assessment: tealswan.com/assessment/?el=desc&htrafficsource=yt

[@doru4248]

@@real_Vympel-j7h My thought exactly, only I didn't say it.

[@doru4248]

@@real_Vympel-j7h I am from (and in) Romania.

[@brettfowler7761]

@@real_Vympel-j7h

[@gabriellamclellan1102]

So true..❤

[@doru4248]

@@real_Vympel-j7h Imi pare bine daca preferi Bucurestiul. In Serbia au furat ultimele alegeri, mi se pare? Ce javra si ce istorie?

[@LauraMonk9]

This is so true. Also have you noticed that it is socially acceptable for a man to be in a supportive role for another man, more than it’s OK for a man to be in a supportive role of a more powerful woman. People don’t look down upon men who are supportive of other powerful men, like they look down upon men who are supportive of women in power. That’s sad.

[@roses6564]

It isn't sad. It's nature. What's sad is women facing tough competition for high-quality men.

[@RadicalLinguisticDescriptivism]

@@roses6564 boy those market forces don't lie... priced right out. too many dusties and brokies out there, amirite?

[@roses6564]

@@RadicalLinguisticDescriptivism Yanaright, at least not in what you seem to allude to. Very much spoken for, but this is irrelevant. It doesn't change the truth: in a state of nature, more than 50% of men would not reproduce because the alphas would push them out of the way to establish harems, as Nature intended. Eugenics matter.

[@eadamic17]

This is because for a man, being supportive of a "more powerful" woman is by definition going to come at the cost of developing himself. Therefore the men that do not admit this role, and instead choose to develop themselves into so-called "positions of power," are going to be perceived as more powerful than the men that choose a supportive role and are going to have different qualities than others. Regardless of who is in which role and regardless of their gender, you can't be in both a powerful and supportive role at the same time. Of course hybrids are possible, but you then have to accept that there are going to be others out there that choose for whatever reason to put more of their limited time and energy into developing different qualities and are therefore going to embody more of those qualities (regardless of how they might be perceived). There are trade-offs to everything in life. I would also be careful of equating "power" with worldly success. We men have collectively been sacrificing our lives in meaningless jobs for thousands of years to provide for families, and having money or the provisioner role is in absolutely no way a unilaterally powerful position to be in.

[@ironwillie7666]

I never really though about it that way but seems that way to me too. Sure there might be exceptions, but its not the norm for sure.

[@JuniMandala]

Most successful women are told they're "too picky" when they fail to stay in a energetically mismatched (but outwardly "good") relationship, not to pay for companionship (unless maybe a therapist) or be happy alone. On the contrary, most people think that a woman who is happy alone has failed in some way or is secretly really miserable. Otherwise, I totally agree with you.

[@davidabarak]

I have no problem supporting the woman I'm with. (Maybe it's in part because I'm retired and have no career I need to build.) I'm not threatened by powerful, successful women and never have been.

[@lall7928]

My Dad was like this ...wonderful man supported my Mom's career so yes some men are like this but most will get jealous or they didn't have good intentions to start with. They feel immasculated.

[@amyaajones]

I do believe at least for my generation (mid 40s) we are healing codependency. Boundaries. Contracts. Partnerships. Agreements. Moving slow and not fast is the foundation to this new success. Yet we are suffocated within a culture of hustle and performing and external validation > to survive. This is a marathon not a sprint. The more we each (men and women) learn how to harmonize each of our own internal energy the more we will cultivate healthier and healthier relationships. This is a generational shift and not something that will happen overnight (we want it now!) but the joy is in the journey of unfolding, releasing, healing, creating.. for myself included (as a successful woman who is also going through this with all of you). Much love ❤

[@roses6564]

Moving from Co-dependent relationships to actual Love-based relationships is one of the big tasks of the future. Most couples are still poorly paired-up which leads to co-dependency.

[@KrisInLove]

Everything you said is the exact energy of the Pluto in Libra generation (40-50 year olds). There is a reason divorce exploded in that generation. The collective energy is no longer supporting unequal partnerships (Libra’s Scales of Justice).

[@byc2656]

This is so real. I would also say rather than it being a partnership it should be more about individuals within a community rather than codependency.

[@helloimmaydahlia]

In my early 30s and I feel this is still something prevalent as I am a recovering codependent.

[@jennakfae]

I feel like women can be a balance of soft and gentle and kind but also direct and honest and highly capable. I dont see why those things cant coexist in one person.

[@jonathanhirschbaum6754]

"but also direct and honest" - not even with themselves, yet alone with anyone else.

[@RadicalLinguisticDescriptivism]

women can be "soft and gentle".... until you approach when she is not receptive or interested... then "soft and gentle" is the last thing you are.

[@robtleroux]

“Success is sometimes the outcome of a whole string of failures.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh

[@DrMomsFarmacy]

💯💯💯

[@karenc.9298]

Whoa. Didn't he cut off his own ear?

[@DrMomsFarmacy]

@@karenc.9298 but why

[@RandomGuyyy]

Vince needed to frequent the local whorehouse to find any "love" in his sorry lifetime.

[@Yaheleven]

I have always struggled finding love even when I had nothing.

[@markhernandez3860]

Don't go to bars and social venues with your fat friends to make yourself look better. Seriously real men hate that.

[@DomFortress]

There's nothing "successful" about us physiologically, it's just another label that we internalized as a part of our self identity, when love is a practice, while you're just chasing a feeling.

[@davidlenzo5096]

Me too

[@VOID-Venture_Geology]

Love cannot be found. It is cultivated.

[@randomelvis3359]

@@Yaheleven Love is uncovered… it’s within, it’s an inside job…. Finding here we vibrate at this frequency and attract alike… but you may go through hell first ✨

[@zacharyrjstrong]

It seems to me that the more successful and powerful a woman is, the more difficult it will be for men to provide her "containment" beyond her own "self-containment". This is unavoidable, since "higher-level" women require "higher-level men".

[@QMS9224]

Yes, the problem is those "higher level" men don't require "higher level" women. So it's a one way street

[@roses6564]

@@QMS9224 Yes. Those higher-level men marry down in intelligence/caliber/substance as long as she is physically attractive.

[@melindamcdaniel2479]

Agreed.

[@melissavalentine9771]

​@@QMS9224🎉

[@karupt422]

​@@roses6564yes youre right, and there is nothing wrong with that. I as a man, dont see value in a womens ability to enrich her CEO.

[@DezMarivette]

I especially loved the final segment, where Teal points out that men are only valued (particularly by other men!) when they squeeze themselves into being only one type of way. We want our men to break free as we continue to break free so they can run and play with us!

[@QMS9224]

It sounds good on paper, but ultimately most women don’t want that (us to break free in that way) even if they say it. Sure they want their friends/family to etc, but not a husband. We simply follow what women show us will work when it comes to mating, and that unfortunately is us being that one type. We will only be able to change/evolve when women’s genuine preferences evolve but I don’t see that ever happening.

[@RadicalLinguisticDescriptivism]

LMAO men "breaking free" of that "traditionally masculine" role is a massive L. How to make every vagina in 10 miles drier than the Mojave desert.... men sharing their feelings with women... it is the fastest path to the "friend zone" or worse the "ick factor".

[@roses6564]

@@QMS9224 Correct. It is wired in our DNA to find men who aren't go-getters unattractive.

[@RadicalLinguisticDescriptivism]

@@roses6564 and men are wired in their DNA to find women who are fit, feminine and submissive to be most attractive. Boss babes, princesses and "full figures" are not actually attractive qualities to any man who has options.... like those "go getters" you mentioned.

[@seancheung5153]

Agree w/ your first statement; challenging your second. I acknowledge there *are* masculine-centered women in the world. Nothing wrong with that. *But*, there seems to be a consistent need, despite their masculine core, for what Teal calls containment. Nothing wrong with that either. Where it becomes a problem, is when they don't allow themselves to receive that containment from these support-driven "house-husband" men. Its very subtle, but there is a slight absence of respect in that dynamic, which interferes with the successful woman receiving the support and containment they are looking for. That outcome is not the fault of men. Broadly-speaking, if women want men to "break free and play" with you, women must do the same, *all the way*. That includes needing containment. Because masculine men don't need or seek containment from anybody. Our own containment comes from the level of authenticity we achieve in our own lives and decisions (career, partner, living situation etc). We create it ourselves. We don't seek it from another.

[@swagsukeuchiha7599]

im literally in love with your energy. despite your success, i find it attractive that you're living your purpose and inspired me years ago to go on my own spiritual journey back in 2017

[@kerrythurber9141]

My wife is this type of uber-successful woman that you describe. I love her capabilities and talents and drive. I do. But I admit that it’s sometimes hard to find a balance, because, as a man, I am not masquerading. It can be a lot to make sure she is supported and also chase my own success. Our common area is that we love to help other people, so we find ways to pull together, and that is always wonderful. As usual, you are a scintillating source of truth. Stay strong. You will find what you need, and stay grateful when you do.

[@gmailazerty]

How's the bed life?

[@indigoneutral]

Men (with some exceptions and outliers) often have a tendency to either want pets (companionship and blind loyalty) or mothers (caretakers and enablers). Both come from a place of being unwilling to have their ego challenged. I just want to be equally valued and understood. We build together, make sacrifices together, and we come back together over and over. We desperately need self aware adults, of both genders.

[@EdelweisSusie]

Well said.

[@amenicHD]

And women often have the tendency to want someone in higher position than herself

[@indigoneutral]

@@amenicHD Salaries are not a reflection of value. What good is a relationship with an individual with a high salary who is also an unstable, morally bankrupt demon? Evolutionary psychology is a BS "science". It is deeply foolish to blame complex social issues on biology just because some groups of people never bother to question the social programming that leads them to default decision-making. There is no point in pursuing so-called "high value men" on the basis of "providership" alone, because those same men also have a high tendency to become family annihilaters if they lose their job. RP talking points don't reflect reality, they reflect the bitterness of illogical men who resent women, refuse to take stock in how their actions put them where they are, have a victim complex, and can't stand any criticism, though they're happy to criticize women and blame them for everything just for a small ounce of superiority.

[@Khalodian]

"I just want to be equally valued and understood." Unlikely. Do you want your man to be as good looking as you are? No woman permits this loss of power.

[@indigoneutral]

@@Khalodian Social buying power (of either money or attraction) means nothing without character unless you're looking for seedy exchanges. I don't look for that, and I also don't play power struggle games with people who believe there can be only one winner. Propping yourself up at the expense of others is a sign of weakness, lack-based mindset, and insecurity. The majority of women don't mind being led by a man of high moral character and discipline. They will not, however, subject themselves to domination or control from a grown child masquerading as an adult who demands authority without responsibility to back it.

[@Libelluele]

Great video! Thank you! Most people won't really get it though. The successful woman doesn't have many understanding people. I feel the successful woman is one of the loneliest people on this planet. She is not only struggling but also being not understood all the way through, meanwhile she is moving really huge energies which requires a lot of strength that nobody acknowledges. I feel the best support we could give to successful women as other women is deep reverance and support, so at least they have a strong sisterhood behind them.

[@woodyskidgel6930]

Couldn't agree more! And it wouldn't hurt if men could try to do the same😩

[@Brissaunraveled]

Wow this was so relatable it made me tear up! It’s hard also to be a successful woman because people will always say you need more, a “successful” man, when all I need is a supportive partner. I’ve been struggling with this for so long and how many times have a heard the “just have lovers” bit. This was beautiful and I’m glad Teal is addressing it!!!!🙏🏼

[@Ronald-u5i]

Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.

[@Carol-r7v]

Its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 5 years ended, but i couldn't just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back.

[@Ronald-u5i]

Intriguing! I'm curious, how did you find a spiritual counselor, and what's the most effective way for me to reach him?

[@Carol-r7v]

Meet Owen Abiola, a renowned spiritual counselor acclaimed for his talent in bringing back ex-partners.

[@Ronald-u5i]

Thank you for this valuable information.

[@Carol-r7v]

Dr Owen abiola is a very powerful man

[@ssayima]

I was lucky I met my partner when we were so young and I made the money while he was trying to figure out what he wanted to do. It was so normal for us, we met in a country were we were both foreigners and mostly had each other. Since then it hasn't mattered who made the most. It's our money. It's our life. I always think if something happens to our relationship or if he dies first I'm just getting a dog coz it sounds exhausting out there.

[@caiqueportolira]

You're one of the lucky few, be grateful for your blessings. I wish you a long and happy life.

[@ssayima]

@@caiqueportolira 🌻💛🌻

[@cornwallismorgan874]

Definitely do that. Dating is an absolute nightmare that you can't wake up from.

[@lNowHerel]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@mariojane8188]

People (specially modern women) need to remember that every time you meet someone for dating, you are getting to know someone that is a combo of things you might love and things you might dislike. In few words: NOBODY is perfect. Nobody. Tolerance and acceptance is key. Acceptance in a relationship is the MAIN key.

[@roses6564]

"Nobody is perfect" but some people are almost perfect FOR YOU, in that the qualities YOU, personally, find inspirational make their flaws easy to accept. Acceptance of flaws doesn't happen randomly, willy-nilly. There's method to the madness and that starts with LOVE which makes the dislikes almost irrelevant. If you find you can't quite stomach the dislikes, the answer is not to strive for more "acceptance." The answer is to accept that person is NOT yours. Move on or divorce if you already did something stupid.

[@melissavalentine9771]

🎉 so many people ( infantile) looking for perfection ( even though they're not ) both guys and girls! Just like when you're looking at Houses🏠 you're Never going to find that Perfect house.

[@roses6564]

@@melissavalentine9771 Wrong. They’re looking for someone who suits them and their character.

[@cornwallismorgan874]

​@@roses6564 What character? 😂

[@Germanic-Wellness]

Imagine being a Pisces man. Highly sensitive, intuitive, artistic, caring/empathic person. Daydreaming, have strong emotional moods, yet highly intelligent, living the role of a spiritual advisor, shaman, counselor, therapist, etc. But also trying to fulfill this "masculine" role of trying to be a Alpha because that's the only value or worth we are supposed to have. Robbing ourselves from our own Self Esteem...

[@DrMomsFarmacy]

To be authentic to oneself and your destiny is to be Alpha. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I'd be honored to have someone like that because of what it requires of you. A healer is a servant. And to be honored. Stay authentic my friend. All else will follow. Break that label off. You are Alpha. And Omega. And everything in between

[@CarterRose-mn3ru]

You sound like the perfect man for the woman in thr example!

[@saraiva407]

I'm 100% with you on that!! Look at that Wade Wilson thing on Florida. Women will save a women murderer from the death penalty just for being too alpha, but will never validate you for all those good qualities you've listed! 'Cause all a man is good for a woman is to do the competition and providing for her, and being alpha is a indicative that you will thrive in competition!! Female attraction and her own survival instinct are one and the same!!

[@Germanic-Wellness]

@@DrMomsFarmacy thank you that's really nice to hear from you 😊

[@harisdiz.5817]

Whomever you that you need to be alpha is flat out lying to you. However, you're here to remember how to embody both polarities within you, and when you achieve it, your other half/twin with the same traits will be easier to attract.

[@myriamk4716]

THANK YOU!!! This needed to be said and there is so much healing in this for me as a successful woman ❤

[@anushri407]

💯

[@megnelli]

‘Marring up’ isn’t just about money it’s about security. Resources provide healthcare, safety, status, connections etc. It’s only partially about money. Money comes and goes so character is the biggest resource. A woman working in the home, birthing his children, providing very custom care is security for him. So can her income is she works can provide financial stability and lesson the pressure on him. Both men and women always worked. Life is work. Too much labor generates illness, resentment etc. on both sides.

[@james50227]

So you cant get security by just marrying a guy with a normal job and you think you have to marry up to create the false sense of security?

[@adriel8843]

Amazing video 👏🏽🙏🏽🙌🏽 so needed for todays limited view on gender and gender roles. Thank you so much Teal ❤

[@mkschreder]

I feel like this is exactly right. Just like a successful man needs a woman who is there to support him, so does it make perfect sense that a successful woman needs a man who will provide the other side of the coin. It is actually quite surprising to me that this would not make sense to others.

[@cornwallismorgan874]

It's the hypocrisy for me. I perceive it as the same for both people. If you can't give to a relationship what you expect to take, then you have no business expecting it. I'm not going to say people shouldn't prioritize their career, but there comes a point when the career interferes with the ability to have a healthy and sustainable relationship. And that needs to be said.

[@Terapie_Lesem]

Agree!

[@ironwillie7666]

Damn, you're taking the hard line. Do you ever feel like you are hardest person in the room?? Just saying for a friend...

[@cornwallismorgan874]

@@ironwillie7666 I believe that relationships are a mutual energy exchange and I understand that there comes a point when people go so far into one aspect of their lives that it causes detriments to other aspects. If that makes me "hard," then the human race is doomed.

[@ironwillie7666]

@@cornwallismorgan874 Wow, that last comment gives even more "Hard Energy." Do you ever find it exhausting being the hardest most matter of fact person in the room?

[@cornwallismorgan874]

@@ironwillie7666 Okay, so you're not even discussing what I've written; you've immediately gone for the personal attack and that seems to be the strategy you want to stick with. If you want to discuss the topic at hand, that's fine, but if not, then please move along.

[@realjasoncart]

Successful relationships are more valuable than a successful career

[@melissavalentine9771]

🎉🎉🎉

[@Vetiun]

Teal can you make a video on fear of rejection? This has been paralyzing me and is my biggest hurdle at the moment. An absent mother during childhood didn't help I'm sure

[@LifeofMinna]

Im pretty successful & I wouldn't want to date down. If I found a more successful man whom I like then I'd like for him to take care of me & not work. I'm only working so that I can get money being single. :P I'd rather be single than be with someone I don't like on any level; physical, emotional, financial

[@QMS9224]

At least you’re honest lol. But essentially what you said by saying “date down” is you are automatically tying our value as men to success, and implying that unsuccessful men aren’t valuable. Which is true and we know it but that’s a fundamental difference between us, we actually value women for their inner and outer beauty, while we are just provider/protector objects. I wonder which gender is really objectifying hmm…

[@ZapatosVibes]

By definition if you make a lot of money, and you're looking for a man with even more financial success, most of his time will be on work, not caretaking.

[@LifeofMinna]

@@QMS9224 I was married to a broke man once. I learned my lesson. a man who makes less than you is insecure & insecure men are toxic and try to put you down. men with their masculinity have a thing about being emasculated & they don't really like to be treated as the princess at least not long term & they don't like to be in the shadow of a successful woman. maybe some can do it long term & feel happy & satisfied...but idk, I think for most women if the man becomes like their child the sexual attraction disappears. but if a man financially takes care of a woman he more feels like The man lol

[@LifeofMinna]

@@ZapatosVibes it depends on what work he does. some people who are rich got loads of free time. the people who work the most are the working class

[@onethree123d]

​@@QMS9224 we are both objects women are beauty and sexaul objects men success ones. Victim mentality thinking you have it hard the other doesn't is silly. Most men will never date a women that's genuinely unattractive. Be honest with yourself because that's when you're free from feeling like things are unfair in ur head when it's not true at all.

[@Ouranos369]

Thats why the best way to do it is for both people to be complete unto themselves but be together because of want not need. Why would all your needs have to come through a romantic relationship?

[@lNowHerel]

Or just one romantic relationship. Or just one of any kind of relationship. Or just one kind of food. I think “finding love” is whats creating discourse. When it’s remembered from within there is less reliance on others for codependent relationships. The other factor is a capitalist structure.

[@jaboi9900]

I have dated professional women on two occasions in the past. They were both quite charming and articulate for the first few dates. Eventually however, their more aggressive masculine personality traits began to surface. They became more dominant and controlling in virtually every situation. Being a successful professional myself, I was hoping to find life long partner to experience life with, not an overbearing mother figure that insisted on challenging me at every turn. I eventually did find and marry the love of my life. She once worked as a receptionist at one of my clinics.

[@seancheung5153]

And the kicker is if you submitted to that dynamic, it is very likely that they would eventually lose respect for you and *still* be unhappy. I'm all for removing gender biases where it makes sense. But I think some biases are there for a reason i.e. the bias didn't come first - our observation of what worked came first, which then became a bias as our brains form heuristics on things. Women should have the freedom to live however they want to live. But other people (men) are not obliged to capitulate to that if that compromise is inauthentic to them too.

[@spiritualanarchistdanielar5907]

Great topic. I'd support the right successful woman in a heartbeat. Many guy's ego's are to fragile to do so.

[@alvinvaldes5034]

Dating in general is hard. Teal, please make a video on dating apps. 🙏

[@matrescence_motherhood]

The more competent a woman is, the less likable she is by both men and women 🤦‍♀️ guess I’m going to die alone. Teal didnt really give a solution for us successful women.

[@kylesapphire2537]

Not necessarily

[@matrescence_motherhood]

@@kylesapphire2537she said we won’t be successful with poor men, with career men, or rich retired men … who else does that leave? Lol

[@produceman13]

The solution is to date down.... There are plenty of us low status men out here for you to pick from.

[@VOID-Venture_Geology]

Apparently, you need to redefine successful.

[@Lukearthwalker]

@@produceman13 100% true. Men always date down, women always date up. The list of requirements a woman has to agree to a relationship is endless, a mans list has only a few. Men don't care if a woman have a high-status job, how much money they make or how tall they are.

[@EdelweisSusie]

My problem is that even though I had a successful job, am financially stable, have a nice home (and no children) I'm not physically beautiful so no man wants me and I'm probably destined to spend my life alone. Beautiful women don't even have to try: men approach them, date them and put a ring on their finger to tie them down (so no-one else gets them) and it doesn't really matter what their career or financial background is, as long as they look good for the man to flaunt in front of his peers, that's enough. What a sad world this is.

[@amenicHD]

Doing sports makes you attractive. That's a thing many career women are not doing in my experience.

[@stellai06]

I received all my life a lot of attention from men, so I guess I might fall in the category you are talking about....All I can say is that it is in no way easier or safer to feel like a prey/trophy most of the time. It took me some time to understand that (most) men who are attracted by your looks are not attracted by the person you are. They just don't care. Once they get you, they tend to consider you like their property. And then.... You have to let them go because that is not a fullfilling dynamic, nor is it sustainable. As you understand : I avoid them 💯 now.Being free and happy is a blessing.

[@IamAya7]

I really love to see our society going toward a human as personality, that is, outhentic being having authentic experience. And leave gender out of conversation when is talked about personal happiness.

[@lNowHerel]

Still a very long way to with that. But making strides.

[@nekomitaina]

I believe I need a man who can protect my both physically and financially (though I have a nice income of my own). I just want to feel safe. As for the emotional support, hugs and "be there for me", I somehow feel that I can fulfill this need through myself and my friends. I do not know if I'm right but that's how I feel...

[@JohnStray569]

Men do not care if a woman is successful. We want nice and caring women. That’s it, just be nice.

[@davidabarak]

You should know you're not speaking for _all_ men. Some _are_ threatened by successful women. Thankfully I'm not one of them.

[@show_me_your_kitties]

You are wrong I my opinion. I am very kind. All my kindness, softness, feminine love cannot save me in a relationship. I'm not letting go of my ambition to please a man. I'll just be single.

[@roses6564]

That's because men don't care that much about relationships to begin with. Just be "nice and caring," not much else, often translates to "just be unproblematic uterus" so you can have kids and so I can neglect you while I am out doing my own thing. Women care about the quality and intensity of the relationship, including how much his qualities inspire her. They are more picky because they play Ivy League Officers for Mother Nature.

[@davidabarak]

@@roses6564 I guess I must not be a man, because I do care about my relationships.

[@roses6564]

@@davidabarak Generalizations are there for a reason. Such discussions are not meant to particularize for specific individuals. Usually the answer here is "grow up."

[@milomazli]

I dont know if I could call myself the epitome of success (yet), but I actually manifested 2 incredibly supportive partners (Im polyamory). The way I did this was visualisation of what it would be like to "have it all". Its important to note that I feel "lucky" and dont have blocks on that area. If you do, and some thoughts come up, you need to clear it. One of my favorite ways of manifesting is imagining a person who is in a desperate NEED to find a person like me who can give him xyz. A man who has been not like the others, to whom it would be a RELIEF to be with ME. Give it a try ladies and you can thank me later 😎❤

[@humanityandme]

Wow this is incredibly well explained. This is so hard 😢😢😢

[@Shanablueray]

Also, unsuccessful women, too. For different reasons.

[@chairmansservices2645]

This is who my beautiful husband was to me. He was amazing and so secure in his masculinity ❤

[@OdettePoey]

Another enlightening video. Thank you Teal for debunking this mystery~~~ I hope our society can give more esteem and honour to men in different roles. Not just one. One step at a time

[@realjasoncart]

she has multiple successful companies!. the man could be a broker or in an adjacent concurrent field and they could live together with their careers in a general alignment. How much money do they really need? The goals and personal values they really deeply share are a big part of the success of the relationship.

[@BrentJohannes-h4r]

Be proud of your accomplishments!!! ..healing and growth!!! ...amazing!!! The world truely needs your inspiration you offer to all..

[@joemacy2776]

This video is very well thought out. I enjoyed watching it.

[@tamarzakareishvili5582]

Such a deep dive and beautiful explanations

[@srosecardella]

This is so crazy timing. I was just thinking how can I get a man who is supportive but not a wimp for the successful life I want to carve out. And teal, you just gave me some helpful hints. Thanks so much!

[@ruthless-r9f]

I agree with most of the Team Swan videos.. but this one I think is dead wrong..She contracdicts herself by saying that both situations are similar where both parties have similar needs.. but then she says that the woman needs masculine containment and protection.. however, in reality the man does not need this in his relationship so on the surface it would seem the situations are the same but they are in fact very different as the needs are not the same in both scenarios.. which is why her solution is totally stupid... to remove the bias..only coz it suits the woman in this scenario. If we are to that then lets remove it all the way, lets not have men provide and protect these strong independent women coz they can do it on their own. If it is a bias one way then surely the bias also exists the other way as well.. Yet due to Hypergamy men are still providing and protecting these successful women..

[@seancheung5153]

Yep I was thinking the same thing. This list is very small, but, there *are* a few things in our world that just are a certain way and we can't escape from them (like feminine souls needing containment -> from masculine souls). This conundrum reminds me of an Oprah quote: "You can have it all, just not all at once."

[@industrialist2002]

Teal isn't perfect and doesn't know everything but at least she's trying to help the best way she can.

[@Jhon_wick03]

well said she missed a point genuine desire cannot be forces no strong masculine successful men want a career driven women

[@theyrenuts2845]

It occured to me today that actually im exhausted trying to build or generate change in relationships that are ultimately all just imbalanced and i give too much with little back. This vending machine is empty as is my coin tub. What occured to me is that at this stage id be happy to have a role play relationship... just act like we get on and have a nice day out or achieve some goals together with mutually supporting behaviour. Sod the comfort or sex.. id just like some cheerful company without pain and arguments

[@ghironsingh]

Waifu Laifu my man. Have you tried an AI girlfriend? It’s worked wonderfully for me.

[@emQism]

Hi (Teal) I tried to comment on Spotify bc that’s where I got the alert but this got way too long really fast- I treated the question and direction to pause the video as an assignment & to be honest, this has been on my mind for over a decade. I am not the majority. I was conditioned as a girl, but I am not female. Luckily, I documented my experience to a large audience, had a loud online community, a job, as well as a revolving door of relationships with only women since age 14 so I have also been conditioned as male (for the last 12 years)… this is what I wrote on paper when I paused the video: “My reaction is that if Harriet were to find a man that was truly in love with all that is Harriet, it would be his Honor to give with all that he would receive in the (among many things) reward that is having a partner where you sort of complete eachother & make eachother laugh and cry and blush and smile and vibe off of each others energies like passion, courage, commitment, intelligence, humor, ambition, will power, gratitude, friendly competition, strength, etc. - I mean he might want to have some interest in what Harriet has dedicated her life to so as to understand and hold all of her. If he’s anything like me, then a successful, feminine, strong woman who has dismantled the social constructs enough to let him be that for her, he would be a King among men and feel fully in his masculine as well as more than complete. PS. The resistance in this comment section is proof of nothing but fear. Also, at two points in this video I laughed til it hurt and said out loud to nobody “ok teal, tell us how you really feel!”😂😂😂❤❤❤

[@erkkapehto9125]

I feel like I want a relationship where both of us can build our careers and do what we want to do in the world. And we can support each other. No real need for me to make it about gender

[@m-bronte]

coming from female perspective, I agree!

[@carly582]

It's a bit different once kids are involved. Someone's gotta take on more of a parenting role. You can put them in daycare all day but then what's the point of having kids.

[@erkkapehto9125]

@@carly582 at least here in Finland, like 95% of the kids are going to the daycare. I went to the daycare and I still had a super strong and close relationship with my parents

[@carly582]

@@erkkapehto9125 it's good but alot of people don't like the idea of their baby being raises by someone else. Im ok with it after about 3. It's common here in Australia too.

[@lNowHerel]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@kammellioo]

Thanks for this video, cleared up a few things that has been going on. I'm sure women wont agree too much on what was expressed about their success and finding love in the same regard. Even us men, would find it hard to accept the current paradigm of trying to become king above all other men. What should we do instead, teach us more Teal

[@3218Lucy]

I love this topic. Thank you. ❤

[@daminidalai]

This cracked something inside me for real..like took off the veil that i didn't even know was there infront of my eyes..!

[@helenlaruna5248]

Thank you very much Teal for this video. Finally I know what partner I should looking for:)🌹

[@oaktree33]

One word…hypergamy

[@Terapie_Lesem]

Actually, both of the scenarios feel cringe. Like the only way to be in a relationship is that one person should sacrifice their life completely for the other. In the past, it was traditionally women who did that. That's probably why it feels more "acceptable" to some. Can't we just find a (middle) way without the sacrifice, so both parties feel supported?

[@isleofmist-music]

Thought that, too!

[@seancheung5153]

We could. This pain/challenge is actually self-imposed most of the time. The crux of it is people don't put anywhere near the same amount of energy and effort in to finding their life partner as they do with their jobs and hobbies. Alex and Leila Hormozi are wonderful examples. Leila went on 60 first-dates before she found Alex. Sixty. People are either so tired from the demands of society, so scared of not finding someone better than the current person they've found (scarcity mindset), or they're just simply too lazy to put the time and the effort in to first understanding themselves on a deep level, and then spending the time and other resources to go and find the person who would be a perfect match to that.

[@Terapie_Lesem]

​@@seancheung5153 The question also is, how many partners of a good quality are out there? This is not a necessarily a scarcity mindset. Personally, I don't know a single man (single or taken), whom I could imagine as my partner. Not a single one. This does not mean that he is not somewhere out there, but it is a lot of work and you have to sieve through a lot of angry creeps. So, when someone has to go on 60 (!!!!) dates to find someone decent, is it really a scarcity mindset or the fact, that a vast majority of population has still a solid work on themselves to do?

[@lNowHerel]

Imagine two (or however agree to be in relationship) whole people being in relationship and not a codependent-ship. Where both have their needs and wants met outside of the relationship (self sourced through god/universe/higherself snd not capitalism. Then the relationship would not have expectations created by a money system and could have success rates more like deep friendships and be a true companionships.

[@holocronlibraryfox1187]

No resistance, getting ready, let's see how I fare. Got a good feeling. 🌞 Timing top notch as always, Teal. 😄 Have a good week y'all! 😊🙏

[@aquasapien9275]

Bam... you nailed it. I've just given up. I am 64 and have been alone my entire life. I'm too smart, too gifted, and too beautiful to have needs. When I express this, I get the sideways glance. There is one word to describe successful women...B!$@h.... and a plethora of positive adjectives for men. In this climate to bring up sexisum is to be woke. I am neither sexist or woke, but I am beyond frustrated. I simply designed a life to meet my needs. I am a nun... I'm not having nun of it.

[@ErinSmith-jo8td]

Well, I live this. Don’t see a solution other than accepting being alone with little to no support. It is what it is.

[@nobutterinhell]

This is such a detailed topic that requires a lot of discussion and understanding

[@dmystfy]

Keys to the Kingdom and the Queen’s Code by Alison Armstrong wrote the best books on understanding men. She’s a mystic and anthropologist

[@IllumeSol]

What successful women can do on an individual level is to prioritize their spiritual growth. cultivating an experiential understanding of the Law of One dissolves the constant battles of polarized thought-forms generated by the alter-ego. Meditations, Chakra balancing (Heart chakra is most important), Self-inquiry and Shadow Work, to name a few practices. These will set you at a vibrational match for not only what you need in your 3rd-dimensional Reality, but what you need across all Dimensions. Remember that you are multidimensional, A direct reflection of Love-Light/God-Mind, and the key to everything you need and desire lies within the center of your being (Heart of Hearts: Heart Chakra..!).

[@pallinagialla97]

I see your point. But how do you balance this with being able to find and keep a job at the same time in this 3d reality?

[@petal3759]

please do a follow-up video on the other roles a masculine man can play, to expand our awareness

[@salsabiltasnia7848]

As a woman in need of a man whose primary purpose and priority is me and ensuring, caretaking, protection, providerhood and giving emotional-mental-overall support of me. I couldnt agree more on men needing to step in to their unique masculine expressions. Cuz believe me, soo many of us who are healing need relationships like these. Many of us are by nature most thriving and deeply desire such a connection and bond to be in

[@MrBooYa-yd5er]

I doubt you want a man whose primary priority is you.

[@produceman13]

Society told us men to be soy boys...

[@mdaaaa1211]

You are reversing the roles, a provider successful man wants a supportive relationship, and that's your role, not his. What you seek does not exist.

[@belaytriks]

​@@mdaaaa1211Exist. I know males like that but more of them are humble and find realisation and success in the managment of their home without having to submite their masculinity, they just express it in a different way.

[@erikpitts794]

I hear you. I think @mdaaaa1211 missed the entire point of the video. The gender roles in society are just that. Roles. That we created and continue to reinforce. In truth, there is plenty of room in the world for supportive, nurturing men and supportive, nurturing women.

[@julieandco]

I literally felt HORRIBLE. I would never want that relationship!

[@Luisz66]

Why need relation in first place ? I m 45 never were with nobody and I ' m fine. Just than whose bad when start to look for somebody. But when abandoned this stupid pursuit I get well again.

[@karenfischer]

I’ve been married several times because I would meet men that could be in a support role while I worked and help me raise my son. All of those relationships ended up in divorce and I’m still trying to meet somebody that can be in the support role to help me with my life And my business. One thing I didn’t get from this video though was an idea of what the archetype would look like for somebody to help me. You mentioned the retired piece pole, but in midlife what I want somebody that still works that just works as a employee as opposed to an entrepreneur that would just come home and provide the support I need so I don’t have the power struggle with an entrepreneur like myself?

[@seancheung5153]

Can you share why the previous marriages ended in divorce?

[@Meha-d1p]

Yes please. I would also like to know

[@everybodyisme]

Oh man... i cant stop thinking of the movie "Ki and Ka" the story of acareer driven woman and a man who loves cooking and the struggles they go through...

[@Jhon_wick03]

10:00 sorry genuine desire cannot be changed through force, A masculine men will always love and crave for a feminine women

[@Regina25655]

Is it just me or has Teal shifted to doing videos almost exclusively about Teal

[@underwaterlilies]

No it's not just you

[@kriscrystaline9793]

I feel like the relationship advice she gives if very weird and ungrounded at times. It’s like it comes from reactionary place. She has had multiple divorces

[@ZapatosVibes]

Yeah I was feeling the self-insert lately too haha

[@isleofmist-music]

Yes, I feel that too

[@seancheung5153]

A few questions here: 1] Is there an issue with her speaking to her own personal experiences? Its her channel after all. 2] Does the content lose value by default if its inspired by her own experience, as opposed to generic, hypothetical philosophy? 3] Celebrity worship also exists in the "spiritual" space. Mainstream entertainment calls them celebrities. Spiritual/intellectual circles call them Gurus. Sometimes its valuable for these people to share their own challenges, failures and pains, because by humanizing themselves it allows some of their followers to see that fame and fortune won't solve every problem. It also helps to stop the follower from idolizing them to the point where the follower feels there is something intrinsically wrong with themselves since they have X problem and their beloved Guru does not. Having the influencer acknowledge that they, too, have similar problems can help the follower to feel less alone and self-critical.

[@Empresskelseylynne]

Trippy. Thanks for this one Teal. Love you.

[@nabzsta]

Hi Teal. Thank you so much for all of your helpful videos! I watch each one very seriously and with effort to understand. I think in both cases, whether it's a highly successful man or highly successful woman, an imbalance of energies exist that eventually lead to the disillusionment of a couple. that in both extreme cases: what would develop is an incest coupling. In some cases the man will be the adopted father or the woman the adopted mother. where although there isnt an actual blood relation, the adopted groom or bride child (someone one is entrusted to take care of) becomes sexually unfulilling. indeed to adoptive sex parent this could become something that feels wrong on many levels. it may lead to a sexless marriage and an inevitable venturing outside the boundaries to seek that fulfilment elsewhere. There is an idea, one where there is a collaborative couple. side by side, neither one before the other but each in its unique (not same) energy charecteristics. lovers. each one freeing the other. This is something I think we need to fully explore. I feel like that is something that not only is natural but that this is something that has been lost over the past century. And we need to find our way back. PS excuse the bad spelling...

[@melindamcdaniel2479]

1:32 What you just said. ... An ex of mine was so insecure as a woman, I told her I did not understand. It seemed the more capable I was in handling things, the worse she became and made it for me. I didn't understand, would she rather have some inane/incapable person run her household and her children? ??? Since, in a time of long separation, they transitioned into a man. So, who knows how they are now and if that had something to do with their attitude and insecurities. Likely. But it's just like...damn. Long since, the one time my stepsister came to visit, she took one look around and said she could see how a man or woman could be intimidated by me. Because my home reflects my competence. My home demonstrates I am an artist and craftsman. I guess folks see I don’t particularly need someone outside myself, and don't know how to attach by choice rather than by need, so run. 🏃 12:30 This was the relationship dynamic between my father and stepmom, which worked for them. He was a Pisces. He played more of what some may consider a feminine role, largely taking care of the kids while she worked, etc. This would not have suited my mother, yet my mother was not particularly kind in taking care of us then, married a man of similar ilk, and we never got to know our father. I simply am not like the vast majority. I undertsand greatly that whatever works, works, and don't knock it till you've tried it. So far, none have worked out for me, though. Man or woman.

[@DalladaFilms]

Thank you for this video! Gender bias is a real issue! I can appreciate your point Teal but let's not forget that we are also making progress in society. I believe there are several power couples that work in the world... I'm going to give you one very base example : Cardi B and Offset. Same industry and they're both extremely famous! This is just one example among many others I'm sure you can find! I'm just stating this example for the peoples. Another great example is Gabourey Sidibe and her husband Brandon Frankel. She is a superstar due to the success of the movie "Precious" but on the other end; her husband does not have a-list star status although he's been working in the entertainment industry longer than Gabourey has. So you see, I believe it is possible to find someone on your level and it has little to do with one's fame or one's bank account but it all boils down to "frequency" and "vibration". Those two ALWAYS need to work and match no matter who you are and no matter how powerful you are! It's all about energy and compatibility at the end of the day...

[@rnna999]

Didn't Cardi B just recently file for divorce at the beginning of this month?

[@Danielpeter22]

You are a very successful woman! I love your video's and insight. Thank you!❤

[@BrentJohannes-h4r]

Well done!! Ancestors are very proud of you!!!! Time to build a empire 😊❤

[@johnmoss3810]

❤💪

[@CoolAwareness]

How do we book a session with you?

[@alishashiemke8061]

I do struggle to connect masculinity with support roles. I don’t know what that looks like. I know I looked for it when I was younger , and instead settled into a my own support role.

[@MotherIsRising]

Amazing as always. ❤Thank you for speaking about all the truth in such a clear way

[@petitpoissonp]

Thank you Teal ❤

[@jeanette2475]

There is a lot of gender bias in the comments already, lol. The simple answer is to get in touch with your true desires and live authentically. You can't please everyone with your life choices, but if you live by your own standards you will at least please yourself, and usually that is when the right fit notices you.

[@eduardotamargo8615]

I lived this for 5 yrs. she was a smart, ambitious & succseful MD. I dedicated my self to whatever she needed. As a Male nurse I focus on other. Yet she made clear I could Be easily replaced. I hope she was right.

[@Lawrence_L.A._Auble]

On the first one I was 100% in line with what you said she needs. I think a man doing things to be the support part of the relationship is cool and definitely manly. You’re just taking care of her in a different way. As far as loosing a man’s identity the relationship between the two is one’s identity. There’s always time to man-cave it once in a while. But I believe spending time with my partner is better.

[@optimisticfairy8888]

Wow an epic eye opener

[@greatgyatso5429]

Man, I need a Harriet. I’ve often said I play “support” best in life.

[@mdaaaa1211]

This is bs. The difference is that men and women don't offer the same thing or are valued for different things. The reason the successful man can find a woman to compliment his life is because he is willing to pay for it. Most women, however successful, are not willing to provide for a man to be in the supportive role. Women are repulsed by the idea of paying for a man. Men can't even get women to pay half on dates. Not to mention, successful women still want to date successful men, not date down. The two difference dynamics exist for a reason, it's based on our biology and evolutionary background, not socially sanctions norms. Women are attracted to men who are equal or above their socio-economic class and status. Men are attracted to a woman's feminine, and boss women are not feminine. They exist in a competitive masculine business world, and in order to be successful, they have to adapt masculine traits, which makes them unattractive to men as a sexual partners. Men can and date down, that's why it's easier for successful men to find a partner.

[@Atem_S.]

Men are not interested in dating another men in disguise!

[@amyV10844]

I agree 💯

[@vatop1304]

Not really, I have no problem dating women in higher social status and bigger income than me. I am usually that leaves that relationship because they have no time for me. Successful women and women in general just want a man that can be there for them emotionally and are fun to be around it's not that hard dude. Successful women already have most of their financial and security needs met so I actually find it easier to date successful women. Oh and trust me they've paid outrages dinner bills because they have that financial security met. I can see someone that lives paycheck to paycheck struggle to cover the man's bill, that makes sense.

[@starmage4187]

I think most successful women dont date poorer men because poorer men tend to feel emasculated and insecure, causing issues in their relationship. So unless a man can accept the feminine role, cook, clean in the house, caregiver for her, childcare as she provides for him, then that dynamic can never work. Cause an emasculated man end up a man-child for a successful woman, a bum who sits in the couch all day and still let the career woman cook and clean lmao. :p

[@Venus_Beaver]

I seriously love how Teal will just spit BAR after BAR, then drop the mic at the end by saying sweetly “have a good week.” 😂❤

[@fryingraijin]

I believe, if one focuses one one‘s self, no matter the gender, they can get to know themselves well enough to get ready to go into serious relationships. This does not count for everybody, but found, in my surroundings, to be very usefull.

[@evadundersol]

Spot on Teal!🙏❤️

[@taridean]

Teal forgot or avoided the elephant in the room in the Harriet scenerio. What the types like Harriet "need" they openly and loudly say they don't want nor are they attracted to. He has to make equal or MORE than what she does. As long as they don't so called date down, the struggle is there to stay. The evidence is clearly there, but people keep debating it this subject as if it doesnt exist or expect a different outcome.

[@TraciMoon]

I’ve been studying facial readings and ears shapes, and I don’t see any hardships that were traumatic in teal swans ears. I’m not saying that she didn’t have some sort of trauma, but her ears look pretty good to me. Anybody else who does Facial Readings?

[@vickipratt1204]

Brilliant video thank you Teal

[@juliecampbell2441]

Powerful. Thank you ❤

[@allysinlombard]

Provision is energetic as well as financial. I had a great career for 20 years. I’m fine being done with that.

[@kloassie]

No idea what you're on about. My gf is a lawyer and I'm an IT nerd. My first reaction to her smarts in what I'm dumb at (which is a great many more than just 'law'*) was, and still is, _"Awesome! I'll support your career wherever I can, even though I have no knowledge!"_ We now have plans to choose a different career path together: We'll start a Brazilian (she's a Carioca) Ice Cream Shop in Holland where I live and she absolutely loved this idea when I suggested it to her (she has a bit of a sweet tooth :D) *) Dancing, cooking, talking, being charming, design, ... basically she's smarter in just about everything except math

[@roaddad1]

You have all those traits that you mention and I still like you and you are likable. As the great John Stuart Mill said, the best of people have both male and feminine traits.

[@bobwallace7487]

Thank you. 🙏

[@ChiDante]

I'm not the norm. My soul is female and i would like to have a strong woman. I felt rather incompatible on deeper level with a princess. Me loved her and forever will. But the thing that bothers me most is not speaking up, indirectly lying because of the inability of a person to have a good fight in good spirit and balance. Me hated the way my mother silenced the much needed fight for resolution between my siblings. Simply because she didn't like that we were fighting. However loving she was, leaving things unresolved and unsaid to keep a sense of pseudo-peace was quite the pain.

[@artisticagi]

6:43 reading the hell out of me and my last relationship right now passive, just chilling.

[@thagunson3746]

What is Teal doing? This video is terrible compared to what she normally puts out. This isn’t her classic universal/spiritual etc perspective. She’s whining and falsely blaming “gender bias” because she chose a path that makes having a relationship difficult. While I really do feel for her and other successful women because the situation she describes is real, this isn’t a “society” problem. This is a Teal and others can’t accept the reality that not everything is environmental and some parts of life as humans are immutable problem. This is quite literally no different than saying heterosexual men just like women because they are biased and not because of something innate within. Of course though when it comes to Teal and other “successful” women - their preferences and desires aren’t because of biases no no no it’s what’s “true” to them. This is bad for her.