Will my Kids RESENT me for Homeschooling? Homeschool Chats | Does Homeschooling cause resentment?

[@lifewithginab]

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[@YasminB-u9d]

Yes, my biggest fears are that my daughter will feel lonely, feel like she missed out, and resent me. Academically, she'll be fine.

[@lifewithginab]

I think it's important for us to talk to our kids... I always ask my kids... do you guys want to go to more groups... are you feeling this way or that way... has your daughter stated that she feels lonely? Communication is everything ❤️🙌

[@mommygirlandtheminivillain1178]

This is the thing I struggle with the most actually, finding social groups for my kids, they want to make more friends but I'm struggling to find affordable options for social groups in our area.

[@lifewithginab]

it was my biggest struggle too! And now that I moved I am starting from scratch... hope you are able to find a group of friends!

[@kanniaplancher]

This was truly enlightening. The things you mentioned are the silent worries I have in my heart. My kids are still young but this shows that I don’t have to worry so much and God will be present to help.

[@lifewithginab]

So glad this was helpful friend ❤️❤️❤️

[@seasonsofwonder]

This is all very interesting. And yes I agree, people may be resentful for many reasons, and not necessarily relating to homeschooling itself. Open communication is definitely very important so that children understand why we do certain things or abstain from doing certain things. Lovely conversation. Great insight! 🙏☺️

[@lifewithginab]

Thank you for sharing! ❤️ so glad that we chat about this aspect of homeschooling:)

[@Abelfam5]

Someone once told me my kids would not have any real meaningful friendships because they don't go to school. Which got me thinking that none of my friends are people that I went to school with. My best friend went to the same high school as me but we were never friends in high school. We became friends after highschool because we ended up working at the same place. And now, we both homeschool.

[@lifewithginab]

I can so relate to this!!

[@mommapod]

Oh ,how I would love to live near you and your beautiful family! Your son sounds so much like my daughter. They would be great friends! She is nine and has been in a similar situation at a park. She tells me all the time she doesn't understand how children can speak or act in such a way. She is such a sensitive girl and she gets sad seeing young children behaving that way. Both my younger ones (6 and 9 yrs old) also feel uncomfortable around children that speak in a negative or rude way. They are so cautious of what they hear and watch. It is a very comforting feeling as a parent knowing they agree making good choices. I have older adult children as well. I did not home school them. They always say they wish I had but they also enjoyed the friendships they made and the experiences they had. I wish I had as well. I'm just thankful I know what I do now about it. It was almost unheard of back then. I love your videos and appreciate you sharing! Blessings~Felicia

[@lifewithginab]

Hi Felicia!! You are so sweet and your kids seem like they would get a long great with mine! We would definitely be BFFs 🎉 ❤

[@nmm913]

This was a great video. We just passed 1 year of homeschooling. I pulled my 3 kids out of public school January 2023. It is hard coming from public school bcuz there are things they miss (like the valentines day example you brought up). My kids also miss field trips. Sometimes I feel they resent me or will resent me (they are all elementary age). Sometimes they express they miss the friends they had in public school but we don't live in the area of that school anymore and I was never connected with those parents. We go to church so they are around the same group of kids every Sunday but they have declined getting into a church group or even a homeschool group for friends. So I feel stuck. It's tough. Sometimes they express they don't like homeschool but they tell me they want to do more fun things like "field trips" but that's hard on a limited budget. I hold a lot of the same values as you which is why I decided to homeschool and my kids have MANY of the same type of story that your son had with them realizing their peers definitely did not hold the same values. Actually my final straw pulling my kids from public school is on a field trip with my then 4th grader the kids on the bus were singing that Body Shop song which talks about a dad leaving his kids home to go to the strip club. I was mortified but none of the other parents cared. I didn't want my kids around that environment. I hope I'm doing the right thing for them. Thank you for you video, it was refreshing. Best wishes

[@lifewithginab]

Wow, I'm shocked and horrified with your story about that song! And yes, it can be a struggle, and I feel you on the budget aspect, etc. I know it's hard finding a good group of friends.. maybe once you do ...you can plan a trip even if it's once every couple of months... I think us being empathetic and understanding of our kids is so important and it seems like you definitely are ❤️ thanks for being here and sharing your thoughts and experiences!

[@lisaroper421]

My kids sometimes miss their experiences at public school too (but I am also glad my kids are out of that environment!!). One thing we have done that I think helps a lot is to remember the hard things too-- that way they can more easily be grateful for the positives we do have. We do things like look at the time in the morning and gasp that we are so totally going to be late!!-- oh wait, we homeschool, so we aren't! We also joke about bathroom privileges or the ability to always get a drink when you need it. I think Gina and you are clearly being empathetic with the hard things about homeschool-- and I think that's so important too. Our kids' feelings are real. But in our house it has also been fun to focus on some of the flip side. Hope it helps!

[@lifewithginab]

@lisaroper421 Lisa! Yes totally agree! My son often says ... wow i can't believe we are finished our day so early... or like you said some of the privileges of being homeschooled allows for us to do things that we wouldn't be able to do if we were going to public school! Thanks for this comment! So so true Lisa!!

[@brendahowell5946]

Which is worst having a child resent you , or a child lost in a crazy world of drugs,confusion of who they are girl or boy, bullying, learning ungodly things, learning what sex is by kindergarten, having to be someone your not to fit in.

[@lifewithginab]

The great thing about homeschooling is that it doesn't have to = resentment. It can be the best memories our kids have ❤

[@boogsassy1]

Yes that’s what we’ve faced. I do give her the option to homeschool. She does not like public school from bad experiences. The school gave her that outlook, I didn’t. I don’t know that everyone would feel comfortable giving the kids that choice, but I feel like it somewhat helps. We have tried public school twice both times with disastrous results. We talk a lot about pros and cons of homeschooling. Much of what you listed is why we homeschool. Talking and discussing helps so much, for us, she seen it all starting and she knew “This isn’t for me”. ❤️

[@lifewithginab]

@@boogsassy1 thanks for sharing your experience ❤️ your daughter is blessed to have a mom like you ❤️

[@StarKirtman]

My youngest child is 2 years old now, and my other two kids are 14 going onto 15 years old in August and 17 going onto 18 years old in November so there is an age gap in my kids and my 17yr old will be moving out sometime next year and she's talking about moving 3 hours away from us to her home town and my 14yr old lives with her dad in another state. So by next year when my oldest moves out my youngest will be the only kid in the home. I'm so worried that he will feel that he is lonely and want more time around kids his age when he's school age. My husband and I have a lot of reasons why we are going to homeschool him. We are looking into possibly putting him into a co-op when he is old enough and he will get socialization at church too but other then that I don't know what to do and don't want him to be lonely and end up possibly being upset with us because we won't let him go to public, private,etc schools because of the reasons we have to protect him from the craziness in this world for as long as we can. There is Facebook groups that are for our area we live in and the kids of the parents in the groups get together sometimes so most likely will do that when we can. But I'm so worried it won't be enough.

[@thepracticalhomeschooler]

This was a great video! So many great points and I think it does boil down toto the relationship/communication. Loved listening to your heart on this

[@lifewithginab]

Thank you so much Lauren 💓

[@jacquelynmaidl8446]

Socialization is my mom's and some of my friends' biggest concerns. I used to work in the school and have former cowokers who have kids around my son and daughter's age. We still keep in touch and have play dates. Our school district also allows homeschool kids to come in for specials. I also signed my son up for soccer, and he ended up making a new friend. I was worried about socializing, but not any more.

[@lifewithginab]

You're doing great! Thanks for sharing 🧡

[@blessedhomeschoolmess]

This is so rich, so relatable and just a great topic. Thanks for sharing!

[@lifewithginab]

Thanks mama! ❤️

[@TheGLOSSette]

I wish my mother will understand that my daughter doesn't need to be in every single extra curricular activity. She's never been accepting of me homeschooling my child. She thinks that as a homeschooler my daughter will miss out on lots of opportunities. We meet up with other homeschooling groups weekly, we have neighborhood friends, we go to church etc. We're not home bodies. We only have one extra curricular at the moment and I find thats enough. I don't wanna be one of those parents constantly dropping off and picking up all the time. Let alone the cost. I wanna be flexible and have down time.

[@lifewithginab]

It's sometimes hard for people who don't understand homeschool to actually understand homeschool... because they haven't experienced it. It's hard when you have a family member pressuring you. Sorry you have to go through that. It's not easy!

[@chrissydavison3469]

Very good video - it's something that weighs on my mind. My main concern is helping my 7 year old make his own friends. How did you find your homeschooling families so your kids could make good friendships from? I'm struggling with this, as we attend meetups regularly, but we are not making connections for friendships to grow!

[@lifewithginab]

It was hard especially in the beginning... my kids had really good friendships at church... but now we are starting all over at our new town... so it's definitely going to be a challenge... but I'm praying we find some good friends. I'm really praying about it... my neighbors do homeschool so once I get back to our land we are hoping we can explore that option. I also have a friend who lives up North... but I definitely can relate with the social aspect being the most difficult part for me personally because of where we live. I hope you can find a great group ❤️

[@sarahe7515]

I feel the same way and I live by Chicago but not in Chicago. You would think that being by a big city would make it easier to find people. The groups are 2 hours away from me.

[@chrissydavison3469]

Glad I'm not alone with this. It seems to just keep at it and some point we'll make that connection. I look forward to your family connection video as that's a focus for me this year and feel like I'm not quite getting the right connection...

[@Hikkups14]

Amazing topic. Loved the video.

[@lifewithginab]

Thank you so much!

[@efehr5919]

Swearing is something I find has gotten out of hand in this generation, makes me sad. I have a low tolerance for it but seems hard to avoid. Praying our kids will choose to steer clear from it as well

[@lifewithginab]

Totally. Even adults swearing... I feel like it's so bad here up North... like in front of kids and everything. Honestly me as an adult I don't like it. Definitely need prayers 🙏

[@sarahe7515]

I sometimes feel guilty for homeschooling because we are at home and not with other kids. I realize that the public school is mainly filled with Muslim children who stick to other Muslims. Kids on my block are either high school or preschool. My church has closed off children’s church since there are too many kids. My father-in-law’s church has no kids. It is a thought but we do take our kids out more in the warmer months. My daughter tried to talk to kids last year and they clammed up. So I think that she now realizes that kids her age won’t necessarily be friendly or not shy. ETA my daughter is at the age where she sees something on tv and asks is that a bad word? She almost sounds like a tattle tale. She is 9. I am glad she wants to know though. She tries to speak kindly and be patient with kids who may be slower to speak. I don’t think she would be like that in public school. I miss my neighbor that moved though. The kids were older but homeschooled. They played with my kids and didn’t sound like drunken sailors when they talked.

[@lifewithginab]

It's crazy how much kids swear now a days... it just really catches me off guard!

[@sarahe7515]

@@lifewithginabit does. I will admit I don’t swear often but I caught myself when I had a newborn and homeschooling. I was from the public school and church youth groups. Honestly, you think that church groups are better but they aren’t. They swear and they have teenage sex. They are mostly public school children. I keep looking for homeschoolers around me. All the groups are like 2 hours away from me and I live by the city! It is nuts. You would think there would be more but I think we are afraid of big brother and bad habits from former public school kids. I am not saying me but we in general. I had a kid make fun of my daughter and swear at her when she was at the park at 18 months old. The kid was older public school. It was pathetic but I think the norm for them.

[@annieonpaper]

Some kids are more social than others. Sometimes their siblings and the youth group at church are just not enough, like a lot of christian homeschoolers seem to think it is. There are social kids that want to be with peers every day and will not enjoy homeschooling.

[@lifewithginab]

that's why it's very important when you're homeschooling to cater to those needs. I have a friend whose daughter is a social butterfly, and she meets with a homeschool group every single day, almost like a pod. And it's important that we also don't over stimulate kids too when they don't need all that. You can definitely meet those needs when you homeschool... social butterfly or not... which the parent would have to get out of their comfort zone to meet those needs at times.