A Completely Accurate Summary of Destiny 2 Red War

[@infernaloz6486]

"magical idiots who pretend they know what they are doing" has to be the most accurate description of Guardians I've ever heard

[@hamburgerdog25]

I like dubbing the vanguard fireteam as the three stooges

[@daddyviper]

@@hamburgerdog25 2

[@Janitor_Dragon]

@@daddyviper NOOO!! You made me sad

[@Austin-bo1pj]

@@daddyviper damn, you gotta cayde like that, he was the best one

[@brutha_edits]

By the end of the entire story you still haven’t had your ramen

[@meeshopsanchez7347]

Lol

[@thunderlord6250]

Actually u can get ramen tickets

[@shido6806]

ThunderLord THAT WE CANT TURN IN TO RAAMEN

[@hamburgerdog25]

All I've ever wanted from this game is ramen

[@brutha_edits]

Oh my dayz I’m getting old this comment was 8 whole months ago

[@ScarlettHasToast]

“And we’re introduced to a corpse and the two idiots he has to deal with on a day-to-day basis.” You can’t do that to Cayde. That’s just cruel.

[@KingThrillgore]

Yeah, calling Cayde the babysitter to two idiots is over the line. But mostly accurate.

[@wolfpaws5405]

Our ghost spots the Cheesecake Factory and fucks off without us lmao

[@j.o.n3321]

Accurate account 🤣

[@jer103]

Does anyone see the irony of killing "sweet potatoes" with the "Sweet Business"?

[@GabrielCarvv]

I do not.

[@fredweasley3022]

69 likes lol

[@atomicdestroyer8068]

Imagine if we had stasis before Ghaul came “You have no light now” “Yeah, so?” *freezes him and makes him explode*

[@panconquesoxd1291]

*Freezes him and pulls out fellwinter's lie*

[@DragonKnight90001]

.......thats....... cool..... pun intended

[@I_am_a_cat_]

Imagine if you were still playing destiny 2 in 2021 .. rip. Sunk cost fallacy 100%

[@DragonKnight90001]

@@I_am_a_cat_ well.... the witch queen dlc became number 1 in the pre order section for steam so *shrugs* people are still playing it in 2021.

[@panconquesoxd1291]

@@I_am_a_cat_ aywysuaywus don't play this game because I donttt likeee itttttt and it suckssss and it's deaaddd bro let me enjoy my daily session of joining the game and crushing fallen head's or cabal's or whatever I want

[@TheZamaron]

this is pretty funny how he's narrating his character's thoughts to be this: City where the last of Humanity is under attack and people are dying, and this whole time this guy is just looking for some Rahmen. Priorities man. lol.

[@minoman7231]

If he commented on the final cutscene where the darkness pyramids are revealed, he would say “and the sweet potatoes double fucked us over because apparently they’ve been running from the space Doritos for centuries and the shit that ghaul did lured in the Doritos which means that we are totally, and completely fucked.”

[@I_am_a_cat_]

Wat

[@slanted7275]

They weren't running from the doritos, that was the traveller.

[@TheDutchFoxx]

@@I_am_a_cat_ original campaign had a post credit scene with the pyramid ships lurking out in space like mass effect squids. They are revealed when the traveler's light hits them and they pivot into view seeking in on the traveler.

[@Jugggernaawwt]

And we pump ourselves full of dr- I mean light.

[@Maddock_]

I mean, who hasn't played destiny 2 while drunk

[@itsmrmo809]

@@Maddock_ minors

[@Maddock_]

@@itsmrmo809 in Europe, not all of them!

[@itsmrmo809]

@@Maddock_ true

[@shido6806]

Deadstarving 2 ramen war. Deadstarving 2 curse of olives Deadstarving 2 watermelon Deadstarving 2 Ramen revenge Deadstarving 2 sausagekeep Deadstarving 2 beyond halotop icecream

[@skyburnersoathenthusiast7342]

Deadstarving 2 sandwich bean

[@ericgallegos9590]

Deadstarving 2 Coleslaw

[@CapCody]

Deadstarving Deadstarving the deep flavor Deadstarving hause of ramen Deadstarving The Ramen bring Deadstarving The rise

[@CapCody]

Deadstarving: The rice*

[@edianalejandro644]

Deadstarving 2 ramen fall

[@EnsignFuntimes]

"we can't eat any of them because we don't eat dogs" Try telling that to Drifter

[@junk_bear]

I guess the beginning part could be explain with them having a base on Mars. They prep everything on Mars and then jump shipped to earth. The nine (Lore/ if you played during season 6) with some Nine power, took advantage of the surprise attack to disable the coms and make everyone in the city oblivious of what the cabal where doing.

[@friendlyelites]

The Nine did a hell of a lot more than that, they completely masked the Red Legion's entrance to the Solar System as they tore through all of the City's allies before arriving on Earth. The storm that's masking the fleet is the work of the Nine, and before they hit the tower they destroyed a huge chunk of the Reef and destroyed all of the beacons that would have warned the city of the impending attack, that's the reason why our Guardian isn't at the tower too. We were out investigating why all of these beacons were going dark all over the system. www.ishtar-collective.net/entries/estival-excursion?highlight=trials

[@thatrandomsquirrel2924]

@@friendlyelites is that what caused the reef to become the tangled shore? I don’t think I ever learned how that happened

[@brandondennis7527]

@@thatrandomsquirrel2924 Nope. The tangled shore is a former moon that the queen nuked in the reef wars using the harbingers.

[@Husbear1992]

in the lore of the Destiny universe the Exo are actually fully capable of all 5 senses and have fully working anatomy as well as the ability to reproduce children the same as biologically organic people. It's why Cade loves ramen so much and why you can see some exos eating in the games.

[@Moonblade64]

Really?

[@hamburgerdog25]

This sort of stuff inspired me to create this little scene with my hunter exo a while back Exo: hey why is that? Ghost: what? Exo: oxygen, why do I need it? ... Ghost: to breath, Hunter, to breath. Exo: but I'm an exo Ghost: yes? Exo: I'm a robot ... Ghost: _what?_ Exo: I'm mechanical. Do I have lungs? Organs? Am I organic? Ghost: >dissapointed, confused stare

[@Husbear1992]

@@Moonblade64 in some of the recordings and stuff in the newest dlc at the exo factory it was learned that the human mind would go batshit insane without the things that make the exo more human and they go on a rampage led by their baser human instincts, or have a nervous breakdown.

[@bobfruck]

H-how do exos reproduce?

[@cailco100]

@@bobfruck Floppy disk A goes into Floppy Drive B

[@type_x_atm_092]

Sweet Potatoes: defeated. Applebees: stopped. World: saved from Angry Sweet Potato guy by the Death Egg. Beyond Light and Eramis: "Allow us to introduce ourselves."

[@tempusimperious5962]

And henceforth, this war would be remembered as, The Ramen War

[@cerulean_1415]

Regardless of how much fun can be made of this campaign, one thing that Destiny never misses on is voice acting. The Vanguard, Ghaul, the Speaker, Asher Mir, even Ghost at some times has great dialogue. (Yes I know I’m super late)

[@minefish]

I love that the ghost imintates the Drifter in that one quest

[@troypowers750]

"Great dialogue", pretty good joke....please don't tell me you're serious?

[@TheGreatThicc]

As I fondly think back to Peter Dinklage as the ghost in Destiny 1...

[@rockl79]

in general destiny is great when it comes to sound design and art

[@ashermirgrumpymind1866]

When the game first came out the boss fights were harder because ur heavy weapon was either a special weapon or a heavy weapon and you were forced to have double primaries

[@greenlightxbpg]

Yeah

[@revenant849]

The magic revolver could honestly probably shoot through a whole cabal ship

[@RickGrimes..]

Hunter master race! Hunters the only one who down to go down fighting

[@revenant849]

@@RickGrimes.. that's a titan thing, but none the less right. (Warlocks are just book worms)

[@vV_Viggo]

"You ever gone so hungry, you keeled over? Heh, happened a lot in the Dark Age. Our Ghosts would bring us back....still hungry. Really pissed me off"

[@us_is_we9263]

Berdie, Crayon Consumer: *walks through tripmine” Me: “the name fits you well”

[@aquadarkskull3248]

As a D2 veteran, I can confirm that this is exactly what happened.

[@potatogamer1578]

Ikr but I just now realized the triangles were in this beginning

[@D3ZB0T]

it really sucks that this was all removed, i and many others will never get to experience this

[@Raska7]

As someone who did, you're really not missing out on much, the story wasn't that amazing and the gameplay is so easy it's literally game breaking due to how progression worked later in the game making you way too OP to actually be immersed in the story. Ghual is literally the final boss of the story but due to his vanilla health, the game bell curves him making his health incredibly low to the current Destiny standard.

[@zacharys8141]

@@Raska7 as someone who missed this and only picked up the game a few months ago it makes the story boring because I have no context of what happened. It honestly makes the game hard to play because my friends love it since they were D1 players.

[@aidankirby1738]

The flood... I I MEAN THE HIVE

[@sugarhouse8512]

“They won’t stop until the only chain restaurant left is Applebee’s” That had me cracking up

[@realmartcraft]

You need to play Just cause 2, 3 or 4. It has one of the BEST stories to narrate!

[@blackrazor9011]

The fact that this dude put the location as Mexico and that he said the last city was the edge of Mexico is dedication.

[@TJM990]

Love how the prologue extends over 5 minutes in.

[@steveheist6426]

And yet *somehow* this is a better opening hour to the game than New Light.

[@DeadSpaceWing]

As a New Light player, I'm actually angry I couldn't play it like a regular campaign. As soon as I got to the Tower, I had no idea where to go. It almost got me to uninstall.

[@namchef329]

This makes me want the repeatable story missions back so much more XDDDDD

[@I_am_a_cat_]

But they were so bad?? Why? To play then 500 times again? No thank you

[@Mechanomly]

@@I_am_a_cat_ I don't care what you think, but if people want something and it doesn't literally *hurt* you, don't try stopping it.

[@I_am_a_cat_]

@@Mechanomly it physically hurts me when people play destiny 2

[@Mechanomly]

@@I_am_a_cat_ Sure it does.

[@minefish]

@@I_am_a_cat_ then why are you here, watching someone play D2?

[@bleach-chan3199]

I left d2 a few weeks after leviathan came out because there was bothing to do and returned when beyond light launched so seeing this video put a smile on my face and hit me with the nostalgia train hard, so in short thanks man.

[@realperson2217]

now THIS is content

[@Orinslayer]

*podracing*

[@nicholasnicosia2325]

3:19 The way Ikora's VA delivered her lines right here made this one of the most badass moments in all of destiny for it and I cannot find it anywhere on youtube and it makes me sad

[@MovableFormula]

Look up “Destiny 2 Homecoming Mission” and you’ll probably find something

[@bim7355]

That part about Cayde-6 knowing about where the best ramen shops in the city are is true.

[@extinctwolf00]

This is so funny, l really enjoy the“totally accurate” series of videos. Furthermore it is so weird that only 15 comments are on this video 2,400 views and 15 comments!!

[@revenant5142]

Game over... Pyramid ships: *Are you sure about that?*

[@monochromqtic6225]

as someone who has played this campaign multiple times, I can confirm this is true

[@Iruleyouforafee]

Mildly entertaining but the never ending restaurant joke killed it

[@fratercontenduntocculta8161]

This game's cutscenes seem to be made around simple shows of the graphics capabilities rather than making any kind of sense in regards to a coherent story.

[@AceEyedAce]

As someone who had played Destiny since day 1, this seems far more accurate than the actual "story" of Destiny

[@I_am_a_cat_]

Please tell me you aren't still playing it

[@AceEyedAce]

@@I_am_a_cat_ I am indeed

[@TheAHuman]

You clearly haven’t. Destiny has a great story that any actual veterans would know.

[@AceEyedAce]

@@TheAHuman lol, ok bud 👍

[@lorneostronoff25]

I have been playing Destiny since the Day 1 Beta. I recently discovered your Destiny Summary videos and I could NOT STOP LAUGHING!! (Cayde is too busy playing Portal - I died!!) Thank you for this - I am sending a link to all my Destiny friends

[@funnelweb297]

Why doesn’t this guy have more subs

[@firenzarfrenzy4985]

Calling the Cabal sweet potatoes is the best thing iv’e heard

[@jayjayfool1996]

Ah I see your problem, you picked warlock

[@smhouri]

yeeeeeeep. just found your channel.. first vid.. totally freakin worth it and jst the kind of laugh i needed!! thank you

[@Sen-FiredBullet]

That scene when the traveler exploded was just *SWAWS*

[@malice9240]

7:40 i thank you for this refrance *Ian malcom laugh intensifies*

[@sr.memesalot9434]

Wether we wanted it or not, we have stepped into a war with the cabal on Mars

[@danielnlaurawinder9337]

just want you to know that in the current destiny 2 story you find one of cydes stashes which has a bunch of Ramen boxes

[@shiraori5450]

"Recently I played through the Red war campaign" God I wish I could still do that.

[@Williaso]

Why? It sucks

[@shiraori5450]

@@Williaso I just kinda wish I could return to it all, sunsetting is hiding the ability to go save Mithrax again, or finding the presence of a Quria and Savathun again. It was god awful but I love it.

[@DeadSpaceWing]

@@shiraori5450 Sunsetting content in general just plain sucks.

[@bleachatyourservice8052]

Only one minute in and this guy is already poppin off holy shit-

[@callmecasta6299]

I don’t think red war was as bad as we made it out to be

[@nightowlgaming3656]

Thanks to you, I spent 5 minutes rewatching that Speaker Roast scene. Thank you very much

[@fe7general837]

I on god got an Applebee’s commercial while watching this

[@ClearlyInPeril]

The stories in the dlcs are much better than the base game, I'd watch a review for those ngl

[@Nerodmc5]

Who lied to you red war is the best campaign to introduce new players but they removed it

[@ClearlyInPeril]

@@Nerodmc5 nobody lied to me, I've been playing destiny for nearly a decade and have about 3k hours in the franchise. I've played every campaign at least 3 times. Red War sucked to play through, it was a slog and wasn't fun. The story was alright, far from the worst, but you're lying to yourself when you say it was the best for new players. Narratively? Yes. Gameplay and mechanically? Absolutely not

[@lokillye]

"pep talk from a disfigured pug"... absolutely amazing

[@Rileygee0224]

"I played through with some friends to keep ourselves sane" no no. You played with friends to keep the game entertaining. Going insane is a side effect you can't avoid. Trust me.

[@Petkavich102]

This is now the most accurate summary. *Because they took it out of the game*

[@melkin674]

I got an Applebee’s ad when you said you got to the sun eater Applebee’s machine lmao.

[@jacobbrown3781]

An even faster summary: a heist movie

[@soulishere3869]

I know I'm late but they did have a early warning system. The factions have patrols around the planet orbit but one of them (dead orbit) once they saw the red legion they dipped without warning anyone. Because they hopped the survivors with join them and share their ideas.

[@Williaso]

That was lore added later on.

[@Rex73777]

Bro you can't play it anymore so this is now an historical account. Congrats on becoming a legit historian.

[@thedoomslayer0590]

New lights be like "What's the red war" Me a destiny veteran "sit down this is gonna take a while"

[@tarragon721]

My man’s was just hungry

[@TACTICOOL_TEXAN]

"The evil sweet potatoes" I'm dead🤣🤣🤣

[@scottantczak]

Completely accurate.. This is now my go to channel for all video game information ever! Too funny bro. 😂

[@we1rdo_man]

"we're not noble 6"

[@nezarecdiscipleofthewitnes3823]

My man just called the consul a disfigured pug lmfao. Pugs are already disfigured

[@mrredanimations2217]

“Angry triangles” They’re empty space Doritos, thank you very much.

[@wolfgarthefirst5735]

"Cayde wastes his super" didn't you know all the vanguard mentors gain a special ability? Its known as Infinite Supers No wonder ikora dominated crucible she used two supers in the span of like a minute

[@justicetaylor3050]

The extent to which the villain was pissing about and being picky as to how he was going to have what he wanted is confusing when you put it like that.

[@type_x_atm_092]

Tbh I kinda wanted to see how he would mishmash all those references towards the end of the vid. Imma show this to any noob I find for the rest of my life - thanks guy.

[@chefchief3714]

Missed opportunity to call ghaul’s assistant nemesis from resident evil

[@theoneaboveall4533]

Okay, regardless of the funny parts, there is actual lore and explanation to why they couldn’t see the Cabal coming. The 9 had shut down all the sat feeds because they require life to exist in order to live, and had learned that Ghaul had planned to steal the light. This peaked their interest so they wanted to see if it was possible. Turns out, it was possible. Now Ghaul wanted to be chosen so yeah, his arrogance costed him. However, I would think that the cage needed time in order for the Cabal to steal the light. They couldn’t do it immediately.

[@troypowers750]

I looked at a trash can, saw Destiny 2, and said: Your crime is existence.

[@MrSoresu]

And this has me playing Destiny 2 again.

[@Williaso]

And here I thought my absolute hatred of the game would have people still avoiding it

[@MrSoresu]

Someone has to log on, save the Death Egg from future bondage, and kill the space potatoes all while waiting for our Ramen at the Cheesecake Factory. It's a damn dirty job.

[@Williaso]

@@MrSoresu Not anymore. Red War is gone, as well as the first two DLCs. Completely gone

[@DaisyBee11]

"We are introduced to a corpse" Okay, you done fucked up, this is personal

[@seanmurphy9866]

light fall sweet potatos everywhere joining the main villian... THE DARKFEM-

[@peteredenjr.1264]

There's a lot of lore that explains a lot of the weird writing of destiny 2. It just takes a lot of time to go through it all.

[@mindripperful]

2:54 we've all been there right...i mean guarding rocks... hidings from ghosts under duvets Your a good friend wish I had someone like you around when the ghosts visited

[@mrcrensh]

He forgot the triangles half way across the universe that took them only 3 years to show up

[@Gyarretto7]

Ah, the Red War campaign. The greatest quest for food, rivaled only by the Pizza Quest of the Reds and Blues.

[@parkerstokes5882]

got an applebee’s ad watching this so i guess the potatoes already took over

[@elikyler631]

Just found these videos and they're amazing, really hope your channel pops off like it should

[@corbindoesstuff2432]

“It was a one eye one horned flying purple people eater”

[@StarAIwolf]

i wonder how many halo references you made are in this video

[@Klaytox]

I wish we could still replay this for shits and giggles

[@unr3alistic]

Bruh my guardian was prolly trying to figure out how to leave the reef when this happened

[@Eric-hu4ow]

Love the idea of bane and his pug trying to take over the universe

[@crypticspirit6297]

Getting Bitched at by his disfigured pug lol golden.

[@tubesteakdrake7746]

“He just fucking explodes to get rid of him”

[@xandernelson1492]

This man did the impossible. He said he played Destiny to keep himself sane.

[@stupiditycauldron6968]

...And then the egg explosion draws the attention of slices of chocolate cake. To be continued.

[@Al-cf9qi]

fun fact there is a small bug (?) in the first red war mission where, if zavala's bubble dissapears before the missile barrage finishes, he just fucking dies

[@JonathanJ159]

I remember seeing ghaul turn into that weird yellow thing and thinking he became a ball of pus

[@Nman222223]

This is the most accurate representation of the Red War I have ever seen

[@Jijert]

Alternate Title: "I Was Hungry While Making This"

[@bvnbvng]

Still hate the fact they for some reason got rid of the first 3 stories, i like going back and playing through them

[@Williaso]

The other two free campaigns were really bad anyways

[@torunsmok5890]

@@Williaso warmind was pretty good, even if the raid was disappointing and xol should've been a raid boss

[@Williaso]

@@torunsmok5890 Warmind sucked, but it sucked less than Red War and the other one. It was still bad.

[@mcswisscheese3031]

@@torunsmok5890 warmind was worse than red war imo, it was too short, felt rushed, and didnt even make the build up to fighting a WORM GOD even remotely decent. curse of osiris is better than red war though (specifically in story, not content) just because it had a good length for an expansion, had a good build up to the boss, and didnt feel rushed when it came to the narrative and levels. on top of the threat not being a fucking GOD and instead just being a powerful vex mind that we couldnt kill by ourselves and needed help from osiris.

[@izzafandi3084]

6:38. here we see a Titan in its natural habitat

[@bentcn8511]

They are an elite group of potatoes called: Sweet potatoes, hense the red color.

[@ttv_titan_eater_of_crayons]

Destiny 2 Red War: The Quest For Ramen.