Word Choice, Diction, and Syntax | Writing Tips

[@KillianProse]

"Parts of ____ is one of my most common Google searches" is one of the most relatable things I've ever heard.

[@lyssia5138]

This and "types of ____"

[@ShaelinWrites]

@@lyssia5138 oh god how could I forget 'types of___'

[@flwr4yu]

right like why do i do that as if someone would put the parts of a doorknob online 😭😭

[@JLBrashCreates]

Yes! And having a research tab open

[@asherfrancisco7417]

@Bode Amir yea, have been watching on flixzone for since november myself =)

[@LeoMafraArt]

It's impressive how a couple of well curated words can evoque a much more striking image and mood than whole sentences of description ever could.

[@third_6117]

the fact that shaelin is doing this for free i-YOU ARE AN ANGEL MA'AM

[@cheggs9]

Totally impressed you can say specificity three times in close proximity without stumbling. I can't even say it once!

[@ShaelinWrites]

it's because all I ever talk about is specificity so I have a lot of practice

[@krishnarchanakg6984]

@@ShaelinWrites 😂

[@billyalarie929]

​@@ShaelinWrites admit it, you look in the mirror and do warm-up vocal exercises like in the first Anchorman, and much of the time, the word "specificity" ends up, like a comforting hug, a nice cup of tea, or a fairy godmother, making its way into your routine, giving you that sense of security you are so desperate for, each time you decide, upon waking up, to go to your camera and start filming your video for that particular day.

[@ShaelinWrites]

how did you know ???

[@billyalarie929]

@@ShaelinWrites because i understand you!!

[@depressedpotato2145]

•Dr.Kriss Meyers had contained her emotions for too long. -a doctor (or scientist sees her emotions as a specimen/experiment) •The policewoman had pushed off her emotions for too long. -police=more violent daily conversation/linguistic as well as showing a more brutal character •The actress had masked her emotions for too long •the miner had carted off her emotions for too long •the runner ran away from her emotions for too long. •the reporter had written off her emotions •the dancer stretched her emotions thin for too long •the queen cut her emotions for too long •the waitress shook off her emotions for too long •the madam had drunk off her emotions for too long •the lawyer had withheld the emotions for too long •the sorceress had cast off her emotions for too long •the knight had guarded her emotions for too long •the artist had covered her emotions for too long •the actress had signed off her emotions for too long (implies fame by comparing emotion to signing an autograph) Hope this helps for neurodivergent people to have a simple direct way to show “charachter voice” and setting

[@billyalarie929]

"visceral" is very visceral both for the ear to interpret and for the mouth to negotiate

[@billyalarie929]

("ok nabokov rein it in a bit," they said.)

[@writeitdown2013]

Love the comparison you do for The Best Bad Things passage. I really like the way you hone in on the minute details rather than talking in broad generalizations about writing. Really helpful!

[@billyalarie929]

this is my favorite thing. when she started talking about how words are the smallest unit in a sentence (i am not ashamed to say it), i nearly salivated.

[@ShaelinWrites]

y'all understand me

[@theGuildedLily]

I find that sometimes a highly specific noun can come across as overly verbose or anachronistic. You want to add texture to the piece, but really specific nouns might be out of place. I've definitely been guilty of this. For example: "I adore his coat." Gets changed to: "I adore his balmacaan." 1) what the fu*k is a balmacaan? There isn't sufficient context for us to understand what the narrator is talking about. 2) Let's say they were supposed to be a child. What kind of child knows what a balmacaan is? We have to re-adjust our perception of the speaker. You basically already cover this in your section on "linguistic ecosystems," but I think it bears saying. It's not enough to switch out a vague noun for a specific one, it has to be specific to the story. (Btw, your videos are incredibly helpful, I've learned more from them than I have from some of my workshop classes lol.)

[@fallonvandrunen4336]

Your username is amazing. I love it ❤ itz wowwwww.

[@ulla7378]

I agree. Regarding the point 1. While there is no point of writing only to the lowest common denominator, if the reader does not understand the word, then it will be less effective than the vague term. Good author can get past this, though. This kind of situation crops up often (I feel) in historical novels, where author is using period accurate terminology which has high change of being unfamiliar to the reader. Good authors are able to explain the word in the prose and reader is just happy they found out about a new word, their reading experience is still good and as period accurate, it also should fit well the linguistic ecosystem. But then there are those, who do the equivalent of "I adore his balmacaan, which is a raglan sleeved over coat."

[@katameszaros8087]

Shaelin I just want to thank you for being here and giving us all advice. I think I can say with confidence that you're the person on this app, who's helped me the most. Please never stop posting ❤️

[@sublimeretrieval7832]

Those words that sound like themselves was a revelation. Thanks so much for all your videos, Shaelin!

[@Gcherry64]

I could have just listened to a whole video of Shaelin saying words that sound like themselves. I love hearing them!

[@sublimeretrieval7832]

@@Gcherry64 haha, writing skill just beveled up!

[@rachelwritesbooks]

This is my favourite writing topic I can now indulge 🙏🏽 Shaelin always coming through 🙏🏽

[@ShaelinWrites]

you understand my love for specificity like no one else 🙏

[@cjpreach]

"The Best Bad Things" - I see "DEAD CURLS" on a bride as curls that are not naturally in her hair, but which are "plastered" on her temples with some gel or goop that holds them stiffly in place.

[@shayzreads3250]

1) loving the vintage bowling chic 2) thank u for once again delivering the oddly specific advice my pea-brain needs

[@AdamFishkin]

The more you discuss craft and technique, the more I anticipate the publication of "Pareidolia"! I want to see your linguistic ecosystems in concentrated form! (And yes I know the individual short stories are online but it's easier to focus when there are pages in my hands instead of scrolling a screen. Easier on my eyes too.)

[@ShaelinWrites]

I do have some stories available in print if you prefer that format! I also much prefer reading in print too haha

[@AdamFishkin]

That would be splendid. Let me know which editions of which magazines to put on my mail-order shoplist. Hopefully my May budget can cover it.

[@ShaelinWrites]

@@AdamFishkin They're all linked the description of my videos! + I have a linktree in my twitter/instagram bios with links to all my published stories, including print ones. If you want the issue of the fiddlehead (282), you can order that one through their submittable, the rest you can order directly from the magazines.

[@billyalarie929]

IM SO STOKED ABOUT THIS SO SO SO SO SO SOS OSO SO SO SO SO STOKED DICTION/WORD CHOICE IS THE WHOLE REASON MY BRAIN CRASHES WRT WRITING

[@JoshKnoxChinnery]

I think clouds snapping open sounds lovely and visceral. Even better if they're described as taut beforehand.

[@havvaalexander9520]

I would assume “ dead curls” as to be hair extensions, from cut hair, dead and curled.

[@ShaelinWrites]

oh haha my lack of understanding of historical hairstyles is really impeding my literary analysis once again

[@cjpreach]

"The Best Bad Things" - I see "DEAD CURLS" on a bride as curls that are not naturally in her hair, but which are "plastered" on her temples with some gel or goop that holds them stiffly in place.

[@EmptyKingdoms]

Paul Valéry tells a story: once Edgar Degas asked Stephane Mallarmé: "I can't find ideas for my poems!", to which the poet replied: "Poems are not made of ideas, poems are made of words." That's the issue: writers forget they only have _one_ raw material: language. I know the experience, the phenomenological description so to speak, is that we have two dimensions of freedom (qua two axes in Cartesian spatializing): story and language. But to the reader, to ourselves when we get back to reading critically and editing, there's only language. Characters and stories and… It's all just sentences upon sentences, so they better be good. "What does the sun do?" Glow! "Shine. The sun shines." Oh… What you called a linguistic ecosystem is merely diction or the lexicon of a particular work. From the artistic creative perspective it makes sense to dub it something else when we add your consideration for sound, as that could be an implicit guiding measure. What you call linguistic atmosphere is merely mood. "trees _strangled_ in vines" you mean it is more _agentive,_ right? To strangle is an action, an act out of volition, an intentional usage of one's means. That's prosopopoeia, giving agentive traces to inanimate or otherwise non-volitional entities. In the end, prosopopoeia is the figure that sustains fiction, for we make _language itself_ speak, tell, show, feel, recollect, etc. It gives itself life! ("It gives itself" for prosopopoeia _and_ language are both… Linguistic.) "A macaw […] over the ocean." Why not: Screech from jungle. Beach palms. Coconuts melted to sand. Stars stung the black carpet above. White pale face reflected in waves. Keeping it unspecific yet interesting via slight surrealism with short phrasing. Brevity marvels! Another wonderful video, as usual. Lovely stuff. P.S.: why can't she be eating the original sin in her kitchen? Symbolism is amusing, to say the least. She _is_ just eating an apple, but she is musing on her ruined relationship now that she cheated and got this rush of adrenaline all over the place, so that _is_ the decisive moment. What about that? Making fantastic out of mundane is (im)pure art. P.P.S.: Moby Dick @MobyDickatSea an utterly fearless man is a far more dangerous comrade than a coward. I guess Melville just forgot some tips on his way home (hence masterpieces are not that masterful, rather measured by institutionalized continuity of appraisal).

[@Jimmy_The_Goat]

High iq comment.

[@joshuaisaac99]

The before and after examples are super helpful.

[@cjpreach]

Shaelin - Wow. This is terrific! I recorded it as MP3 and will listen in the car a few dozen times, for sure. The one, great advantage of a 16-hour weekly work commute.

[@jpch8814]

Your prose is so pretty *-* can't wait to read your novels!

[@jamiecolwell8489]

I AUDIBLY SCREAMED WHEN I SAW THIS TITLE MMMMM SCRUMPTIOUS

[@justine6647]

this video is the coffee i need rn. it's 1:30 AM in phil. so refreshing ❤. thank u, shaeeee.

[@TheSensationalMr.Science]

so word-choice as a concept consists of these parts?: Mask & Face(what they show, what they hide), Texture(soft or course), Temperature(fiery to cold), Tension (inertia of speech), (re/at)traction in relation, Specialization(complex or simple words) Context (Theme, Mood, etc. [what is general environment like?]) {nouns and verbs are specific and verbs are also more sharp or soft depending on intent/emotion} Hope you have a great day & Safe Travels!

[@ShaelinWrites]

brilliant way to put it!

[@abbiepancakeeater52]

i can't believe i'm only just seeing this video. this is exactly what i was struggling with in my current fiction, about how to use interesting words without being melodramatic. this was such a helpful and informative video!

[@imaginativebibliophile549]

Shaelin, I love the way you explained the power of word choice in this video. In my stories, I love experimenting with vivid words, but it is important to use words and prose as a tool and when appropriate. I am working on using language to create atmosphere and tone in my fiction. The examples you provided today were helpful. I love you

[@deadeaded]

Defamiliarization is such a useful concept. I think about it constantly when I'm editing.

[@r33mickey]

Very helpful! You should do a video about choosing titles. Your titles are so good

[@ShaelinWrites]

I've got one scheduled in a few weeks!

[@r33mickey]

@@ShaelinWrites oh nice! Every time I hear the title "i am a wolf in wolf's clothing" im just like yeesssss 😈

[@music4airports]

I love the use of sound and rhythm to reflect the meaning of a word. It reminds me of the technique of word painting in music

[@fenracket95]

Thank you for not gatekeeping this wonderful knowledge.

[@stephaniewickstrom7331]

I’ve watched every video on this channel, and this one is 10/10!

[@dees649]

Fantastic video! Linguistic synesthesia is when words provide that added sensory experience

[@mattheusfinco7050]

Thank you for this video

[@absolutelycitron1580]

For those of us who cannot afford to learn from universities, these videos are invaluable. Thank you

[@nesser52]

Thank you, very helpful for me as non-native English speaker. I have lists of the lists of my thesaurus sessions 😆 Also reminded me about my embarrassing story: I've used synonym search last second before giving my essay out and the line ended up being like "he was gone as a fart on a wind". My teacher marked it as "are you kidding me?" oops 😅

[@nessie968]

I'm sorry this is brilliant comedy 😭😭

[@annlillyjose356]

Thank you so much for this video. I think this is one aspect of my writing that hasn't improved at par with my progress in other elements, and I've been trying to get better at it. Being a non-native writer, it gets difficult to even think about common words and expected verbs. I've been trying to expand my vocabulary and include better word choices in my writing, so this video comes as a great help.

[@kaleikaumaka89]

Linguistic Ecosystems! I love this kind of abstract analysis of word choice

[@adobejuan2160]

More please. I keep wrangling wrongish wordisms.

[@PedroRodriguez-dl5yt]

Shaelin, you are poetry, you are lyrical, beautiful words that flood my being and take me to wonderful worlds. I could continue writing beautiful love verses on this serene night watching the stars twinkle in the sky and plagiarizing Neruda...

[@graduatedpinksnowball668]

Too melodramatic, work on your diction.

[@tierasheppard4320]

I seriously needed this! So happy I clicked since I’m editing soon🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

[@salmanjaved537]

Unbelievably knowledgeable guide. Thorough work. My hat tip to you.

[@jai7787]

I am so glad to find this channel, please make videos about the core technicality of writing. Especially for blog articles & copywriting.

[@ktstyx3969]

Suggestion for defamiliarizing verbs - "mangrove trees *crept* up the bluff, ..."

[@ShaelinWrites]

ohh I love it !

[@ktstyx3969]

@@ShaelinWrites I like the contrast of the creeping up and the snarling at the bottom. Like fighting to survive yet daring to dream. Or something like that.

[@eighthwonderproject1395]

I’ve set a list of words I love on my Apple notes. I’ll comb through out your verbs list to grab others!

[@KRmedfndllcARCwof81213]

This is relatable to me because i wasn't taught to properly introduce word choice even though I understand synonyms...

[@aweetodd]

Out of all the writing advice videos i watch this was is extremely unique. I never thought about word choice like this before. Thanks.

[@jackjohnhameld6401]

Simenon said that le crepuscule de soir was a lovely phrase, but that he would not use it in a novel. He restricted himself to the vocabulary of the average French speaker, the vocabulary of the tabloid newspapers of his day. Raymond Carver disagreed with Richard Ford on 'earth' being a better choice than 'ground' , Carver liked ground. Orgiastic is such an unexpected word in the closing page of The Great Gatsby : Fitzgerald had the ear of Keats at his best.

[@ScottSkinner-k2x]

Great examples, Shaelin, of pairing words that work with the setting of one's writing, and of condensing multiple adjectives into a single, stronger word!

[@littlemisstempest3765]

I find it genuinely unbelievable how helpful your videos and advice are to me. I just came across your videos today and I'm learning so much already. Your advice and experiences resonate with me. I've struggled to really dive into writing the way I've wanted to due to many things, but it's also been because I just haven't had the right guidance. I couldn't be more thankful to have come across your videos.

[@marsenalyn4564]

I always enjoy your videos and find them very helpful ty

[@rosieloosemore6859]

Thank you so much for this video. I have struggled for a number of years feeling like a failure for not knowing more nouns to describe specific things. It's nice to know I'm not alone in my struggle ^_^

[@vy5287]

Shaelin, you're absolutely terrific.

[@evennot]

I want to write a character like you. For instance, one who stops narrator every now and then and goes into details of narration to confront or emphasize main points. Though I need a bit more qualification to make it work like this, otherwise it will be just random loveliness interludes

[@BeardedKingface]

When you talk about "sound of words", that's what I like to call Euphonia. As I'm writing my rap verses, I often spend a lot of time on words that "sound like they fit the instrumental"

[@pkij140]

I am terrified of that apple.

[@ShaelinWrites]

oh, same.

[@JRoseBooks]

Great video! It was super helpful to see the line editing changes on the screen.

[@vCoralSandsv]

I've been editing for Camp NaNo so this is exactly what I have been doing. Spent 8 hours on 1 chapter. It's been rough!

[@madhurimadas2616]

Omggg! This was just an epic masterclass for free! Thank you Shaelin

[@alexabesadubitrusbyanyiko6742]

Shaelin, I am blown away by this episode. This is one of the best for me. I can't thank you enough for all the awesome value you're sharing with the community ❣️❣️❣️👏👏👏 Keep up the priceless work.

[@mackenziesapphire7554]

I'm not a native speaker but technically certified to speak english on the same level as one (which probably is true for most situations I encounter) but when you showed that first text that you edited to be "worse" it had way more impact on me after the editing because I didn't know half the words you replaced. This is probably irrelevant in most cases but I think when you start looking for synomyns and find yourself tending towards ones that are new to you, you might want to check if the word is also new to the majority of your audience because most people don't read with a dictionary open next to them and when you start using words that aren't known well enough, even if they are ten times more specific than what you wanted to use before looking it up, that makes your prose a lot more vague.

[@Teopengy96]

Sorry I know this comment is a year old but I wanted to second that. While I do like reading interesting and precise words, sometimes it can feel like too much work when every 8th word is new to me. If it’s one word every few pages, then I’m okay to look them up, but if I can’t get through a sentence without feeling illiterate, it’s too much.

[@jakobw135]

GREAT VIDEOS - packed with useful information! 😉👍

[@ApoloBelvedere]

i relate so much to the "parts of blank" bit in this video bc literally earlier today i found myself searching for the "anatomy of a desk" so...

[@ulla7378]

I am very happy (late to the game) to see someone talking about prioritizing sound. It is such a big part for me about interesting and effective prose. :D As a native Finnish speaker, I struggle so much to find properly hard/rough words in English. Those are damn difficult to come by when you are used to rolling Rs combined with plenty of Ks and Ps and so on. On the other hand, finding short word tends to be easier.

[@ChrisAlexander1]

This is one of the most helpful videos on writing I've seen recently. Great topic, and really helpful tactical examples!

[@carterwillis6624]

I needed at 30min video, this is perfect thanks Shaelin!

[@kingrandy.m3986]

Nice work on the explanation and slides to let us see the difference after the adjustments in word usage.

[@nandita2258]

I am not a native English speaker and even though my pieces don't overtly express it, my vocabulary isn't as extensive as I'd like it to be. I've always had a kind of insecurity as regards to my word choice and the fact that i have to google "parts of ____" every time I'm writing a scene. It's so cool to know that it's just a normal writerly thing and not incompetence lol. Pretty sure I'm going to be re-watching this video dozens of times. Thank you so much, Shaelin! This shut my anxiety up :)

[@nandita2258]

@@RS-de3ww I'm a polyglot so when I say I am not a native English writer, it just means that I happened to learn Hindi before English! As far as language domination is concerned, English has been and extensive part of my culture for centuries together so there's really no way around it, tbh. Besides, I write in English because I love the language and not because anyone is making me 😂 Thanks for your advice though. Oh, and if you are having trouble finding good literature by non-native English writers you should check out RK Narayan, Bharti Mukharjee, Rabindranath Tagore, Sri Aurobindo (if you are into the sublime), Kamala Das, Bharti Mukharjee, Toru Dutt. (I could go on but I guess these are enough to get started) Happy Reading! 😊

[@joshuadunham7919]

Late to the table here, but I am glad that you are writing what you love to write in. Besides, from what I can tell based on the comments that you've left, you already have a better grasp of the English language than a lot of us who speak it as their first language.

[@nandita2258]

@@joshuadunham7919 haha, thank you so much for saying that

[@tynekamcdaniel6963]

Im new here. Everything has been so helpful. Thank you! ❤️

[@Blondiedeluxe18]

Fun fact: In Danish we actually say that the stars "wink". Thx for the tips, Shaelin!

[@ShaelinWrites]

Omg I’m in Denmark right now!!

[@uglyluffy7815]

Bless up, Shaelin never misses

[@konradfernandez2922]

Awesome advice Shaelin! Thanks so much!!

[@vpnightshadepersonal]

This was one of your most interesting and informative videos for me.

[@genretypebeats4612]

That sweater is hella fly

[@isparshmehta]

thank you Shaelin the video content you are creating is helpful and awesome

[@unknown117o2k]

Fantastic! This was incredibly helpful, thank you.

[@damienheaft4765]

i liked dead curls, great work. you choose your word well with such thought

[@sumayyahkhan8897]

IM FIRST. YESSS. IBEAT THE PERSON WHO ALWAYS COMES FIRST. AGAIN. VICTORY!!

[@ShaelinWrites]

your medal and crown are in the mail!!

[@katiehettinger7857]

"Dead curls" denote the addition of someone else's hair used to increase the volume of fashionable styles during the period, think present day extensions. If you look at advertisements from the eighteenth and nineteenth century you will see them.

[@abhinaw3906]

It was so....... so ......awaited video 😍

[@uwish1144]

I love your videos!!! You've taught me so much😊

[@j7055]

Fun fact: in French (beginner) and Arabic (native speaker/advanced) classes we are quizzed pretty often on linguistic ecosystems. They’d tell you to extract words related to the sea from the given passage, for instance, and explain how it benefits the passage. You’d then say waves, dock, sea salt…. And explain how it enriches the text blah blah blah. I’ve never seen it in English tests though, but I’m sure it’s a thing in some places

[@ShaelinWrites]

Interesting! I actually studied French for many years (I was in French immersion in school) but don’t remember that, though it might have just been too long ago for me to recall!

[@j7055]

@@ShaelinWrites I don’t know if other schools do that with French or if it’s just my school being weird again, but it’s a big thing in Arabic and we were taught to write down a bunch of words linked to the concept our story was about before we write it to enrich the atmosphere. It’s definitely improved my writing in all three languages! Edit: also this video was insanely helpful, ty :)

[@elisa4620]

Well, I can tell you this is something we do in France during leterature studies at school.

[@hajrah6970]

your videos mean a lot to me, thank youuu!!

[@Maidaseu]

Awesome video. I agree that specification is key in good writing. Brandon Sanderson has awesome lectures on the pyramid of abstraction.

[@j7055]

I’m really spamming this comment section 😭 but here’s a little example of the thesaurus thing: the Br*dgerton book uses the word “spurned” (meaning to reject with scorn) as a synonym of rejected. Except she says “spurned politely”, completely contradicting the meaning 💀stay safe and double check your words besties

[@edenmckinley3472]

I would have put "coiled in the sand like a pit of snakes". I never think of snakes as snarling, and tree roots do coil. Plus, coiled implies a threat that is lying low, while snarled implies that the threat is actively opposing you. Just me. To each his own.

[@galaxylucia1898]

Good points!! Really understanding a word's definition and connotation is really key when writing for clarity and tone. Shaelin's video is great, but comments like yours really help me dig even deeper for my own work. Happy writing!!

[@edenmckinley3472]

@@galaxylucia1898 Thanks! You too!

[@courtneybill3840]

hi i love all of your videos So Much but this one in particular is SO INCREDIBLY HELPFUL thank u!!!!!

[@riyasethi9955]

Thank you so much! This channel taught me so much

[@mymessynotebook2207]

Thank you for making this video! Was very helpful, I’m trying to make my writing style better and more specific and found many useful tips. ❤️

[@AmandaSbarros]

You are so well spoken, I'm using your videos to study English lol (it's my second language)

[@chessthoughts]

This is an awesome gem

[@sunshinegirlonbeach1993]

Amazing content! Keep up the good work, Shaelin❤

[@debbyproulx3318]

Thank you! Extremely helpful.😊

[@boojiboy16]

I love your videos but, they always leave me feeling like I should go and clip my old English teacher round the ear. To think how many years I endured; "Ok class write a story about X." "That's not very good, you didn't put a comma here, or a full stop there." His lessons were never about strong verbs or word weight, the only thing he bleated on about was long pause for a full stop, short pause for a comma. Those two, useless gems still ruin my writing and also I now find out the guy probably knew nothing about writing too.

[@jamiecolwell8489]

Also the fit 😍😍✨✨

[@0Iive]

I’m obsessed with how similar we are 😂

[@billyalarie929]

"a draconis/fica grew on the windowsill" HOW DO YOU DETERMINE WHICH PLANT IS APPROPRIATE WHEN THERE ARE 3 0 0 , 0 0 0 SPECIES?????????

[@ShaelinWrites]

A combination of what would be realistic for the setting/character + doesn't feel cliche + how the sound of the word fits into the story's lexicon or contributes to building it

[@billyalarie929]

​@@ShaelinWrites honestly, you did mention parts of this, or at least allude to it, already. so yeah, great point. also, thank you so much for your answer!

[@izeugirdor]

I love your videos! I've been trying to teach my fellow writers exactly this. I'm just going to refer them to you!

[@arjenachten5849]

Summary of all Shaelin's videos: Be more specific!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@ShaelinWrites]

Pretty much oops

[@arjenachten5849]

@@ShaelinWrites It's okay, it's good advice

[@MillieMartineuz]

Very inspiring video. Thank you

[@TheSweetAlyssum]

I found out how to pay attention to videos, write notes on it. then you pay attention (: also, the sun's light bled through the leaves would be a cool description as well