XFM The Ricky Gervais Show Series 1 Episode 10 - A lot of crabs on the beach

The Ricky Gervais Show Broadcast 26th January 2002.
MECHant: www.man-moth.com/
(Incase you're in the market for some Rock Buster prizes. Full disclaimer, I quite enjoy making things so I'll be adding to them over time and I also get 3-4 English pounds when someone actually buys one. Hope you don't mind and as always, I'm massively grateful).
Thanks for all your support, it's a privilege to be able to document these shows for other like-minded people to enjoy.
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Rarities, Specials & Compilations are here... • Rarities, Specials & C...

[@featheredraven]

"You're gonna get speak, badly..."

[@Nodamnusernamesleft]

I just love the little excited, nervous laugh Ricky does when Karl says "If you shave a tiger's 'ead".

[@WollongongWacko]

well his whole body, the head of a tiger would be crazy

[@bryskib9412]

1

[@a_b897]

21:01 S: “So at night it would be black?” R: “Well, everything is.” S: “Is it? R: “Yeah...” S: “Oohh, not bright stuff Rick! You’ve embarrassed yourself, play a record!” One of my favourite Steve moments.

[@leeroyjenkins5754]

Arran Bradstock 😂😂😂😂

[@morningcoffeecat2271]

Steve is great in this one

[@seanbrown8533]

@@leeroyjenkins5754 how do you know his surname?

[@8.3.4.N]

​@@seanbrown8533 intuition

[@seanbrown8533]

@@8.3.4.N intuitive, intrusive, interference.

[@jcrawley1]

I love how Steve always reacts to Ricky mentioning going on holiday to Bognor with his mum and his nan, gets me every time!

[@capnhawkins]

Party time!

[@tetsuoshima7385]

jcrawley1 they use that on their Microsoft office values video that they did too!😂👌🏻

[@deltaframes-os4km]

hearing ya Nan pissing into a tin bucket.

[@KubbsWickedSoul]

"And I just kept a crab in a..." "In a bucket?" Steve is brilliant in this one.👌🏻

[@threehundred228]

Man I adore these early episodes. Like seriously cherish these. Better than childhood cartoons

[@TheNix333]

Could not agree more, listened to them all dozens of times, never gets old.

[@anyoldactress4078]

The love, fun and camaraderie of the early shows is a thing of beauty.

[@MrJamesdryable]

I love listening to early XFM knowing what Karl will eventually become.

[@dogma7346]

he becomes less normal by the episode

[@TheRowlandstone73]

Ricky's lucrative pet project, pretending to be off-the-wall stupid, gaining surreal notoriety, when in fact, he was just a regular, introverted northern bloke, void of any charisma or discernable talent..?

[@KingKurt]

@@TheRowlandstone73 ding ding ding

[@derek5395]

@@TheRowlandstone73 Void of talent? You're joking. Go watch him ride the bike with the African kids. Idiot abroad season 2 episode 5 I think.

[@squatchjosh1131]

@@TheRowlandstone73 How would it being an act mean mean he lacks charisma or talent? If anything that makes the opposite point. Just because you think it's clever that you realise an entertainment figure might be an act it doesn't mean all of a sudden you (or anyone else) would be able to do it.

[@lowri.]

‘the 9/11’ in Karl’s attempt at an American accent always gets me

[@KJ1234]

Love that bit 😂

[@UnderAGlassMetropolis]

Excuse me, sir, you can have this back!

[@derek5395]

I speak like that, Karl nailed it

[@basedchimera5859]

It's mad that's what everyone calls it now

[@suspicioustumbleweed4760]

@@basedchimera5859Interesting, I live in the US and we only call it “9/11”, never “the 9/11”

[@justinkline8437]

"Which confused him, granddad."

[@HaydnG266]

Then proceeds to say "auto grand theft 3" (though it was obviously a faux pas)

[@DwightSchrutes]

I think this is Steve's best episode. Love it.

[@lorenioooooas]

That ice arrow tip actually works. tried it and haven't been caught yet.

[@lostinemptiness]

"The ice arrow is the only way!"

[@JamesK12YNWA]

Auto Grand Theft 3 was an amazing game

[@eliasmoskona]

Karl might be dumb but he's quick as lighting sometimes! 17:53 Stephen: "Wouldn't you like to go to a restaurant where they have baboons serving?" Karl: "I've been to a few"

[@sanmtlyre0225]

Elias Moskona yeh there were a few times like that he is natural born comedian

[@John-iw1nn]

Oh yeah, genius wit.

[@rooty]

Yeah always very easy to miss too. My favorite is when someone complained they played the same song twice in 30 minutes, embarrassing themselves in front of MTV. You can just hear Karl in the background going "well MTV play the same song all day anyway"

[@s22ad]

Or in the Ricky Gervais Show, one of the episodes where Karl pretends to run a plumbing firm and Sheila and Bon call in to say they're snowed in and can't get to work so he fires them. When he says they have one chance, Stephen says 'you didn't even give them one chance' and Karl replied so amazingly quickly 'theyd done it before'

[@handofdestiny123]

My favourite example of Karl's quick wit is during the show where they're looking through the Guinness Book of World Records. Ricky: You are one of the most stupid humans I have ever met. Karl: Well, get me in the book.

[@PinheadLarryVEVO]

"Auto grand theft 3"

[@TheOssumPawesome]

He's embarrassed to be a grown man who's savvy about video games. Cheeky feigned ignorance lol

[@craigchristian1277]

+TheOssumPawesome Spot on mate lol, love how he trips up and says it properly a minute later when his anecdote is flowing.

[@YourOwnDa]

+Craig Christian Hahaha, I thought I was the only one that noticed this

[@lorenioooooas]

A lot of psychologists on KZbin comments.

[@WollongongWacko]

iamhim you're qualified to tell if people are psychologists? ..am..am I one?

[@cityboyo1679]

Steve’s reaction to the beaker comparison is golden.

[@cityboyo1679]

Steve’s “Oh Party Time” gets me every time.

[@LittleWittleKitty]

Good cause he says it like 8 times across the episodes

[@gibbs7444]

"ohh I didn't mean to buy this. what did you mean toc buy? ...A keyboard..." xD

[@duskfall_777]

I love these but the volume difference is annoying. Karl sounds really faint and when I increase the volume Ricky's laugh blows my eardrums out.

[@rooty]

As god intended

[@simonpenum]

Worst thing about nodding off listening to it. Karl and steve's faint tones then Ricky's screeching howl suddenly bellowing out

[@jiayojames]

Yup that's the problem with series 1, Karl's volume levels are not set up properly

[@graysonkilmer]

Controlling the buttons is a round headed little Manc, don’t forget

[@chrisbrown6920]

He’s deliberately quieter because he wasn’t as important back then

[@brianbarry9332]

Hearing Steve talk about buying his PS2 and GTA III now in 2023 is surreal

[@ChubiceOfChunckle20]

I think you mean auto grand theft 3

[@Daz1634]

​@@ChubiceOfChunckle20 tit

[@alandodd7195]

That's one of my fave episodes. It's really where Karl comes into them more. The American accent was class. You can have this back...

[@MrElephantBeach]

Alan Dodd This is actually where I start when I get back around to the beginning.

[@HopeVJustice]

Agreed! :D

[@craigmcmillan7401]

every american who works for tips knows foreigners arent going to tip anything... 60 cents is an insult, karl.

[@catatonicable]

@AGuyCalledDis Exactly...

[@abbipage1]

Just seen an advert for The Moaning of Life 2 :D mega excited :p Karl's facial expressions make everything he says a million times better! :p

[@ManMoth]

+Missy Moo I was too when I saw it :-)

[@sorryibrokethetrees]

+Missy Moo and the way he moves his body..he's such an awkward little man..

[@edd6820]

Man Moth

[@lukemufc7]

Karl's American accent is fantastic.

[@JakeWilliams283]

Stay Calm scuse me sir you can have this back

[@capnhawkins]

"Of corsh, uh, the narn eleven..."

[@Wackyfox]

Sort of a Christopher Walken type thing

[@antwan.]

TIMESTAMP that shit man

[@Stevinho1234]

Steve is on absolute fire during Ricky's crab anecdote

[@TheNix333]

"we didn't train for hanky over the hand" so it's not your fault hahaha

[@KubbsWickedSoul]

There are escalators on my way to and from work everyday and I often hear Steve’s voice in my head saying “Please, people, just use the stairs.” And I often do, because of it.

[@KingKurt]

I thought I was the only one.

[@briant6669]

seems a little butt lickey

[@chelseajessica4837]

This is nearly 20 years old... Madness

[@mothrajenkins3874]

American here. I've never ever heard anyone say buttlicky in my life.

[@justinkline8437]

Mothra Jenkins Same.

[@Christophee1987]

I think they just dislike British people using the word 'butt'.

[@Shifter22]

Yeah I've never heard that once. But def hear "get off my a**!"

[@DerekDerekDerekDerekDerekDerek]

BUTT is American. We say Arse or bum for short version of the maximus gluteus

[@stevenfaulkner6585]

The noise Rick makes when Karl mentions shaving a tigers head 🤣🤣

[@kyleglentworth7997]

Best intro they've ever done

[@stoox006]

Steve in his prime game

[@CORNISHDUDE]

19:55 There is much debate about which moment Ricky realised Karl was comedy gold, I believe this exact reaction was the moment :D

[@bhyteme]

karl making a tiger king reference so long ago he really is an absolute marvel

[@lilme7052]

God I laughed at that

[@justinkline8437]

"What did she do with it? Sold it. Got a five pound starter bag of skag, and the rest is history."

[@capnhawkins]

24:56 Steve should definitely do some sort of audiobook reading, because he is a really good reader. I'm sure he has his degree in Film and Literature to thank for that. He just launches straight into it and it's really solid. It's half of what made the readings of Karl's diary in the podcasts so enjoyable. Out of the three of them, Steve is definitely the most natural at radio and the best at it. Ricky mainly got in because of his personality and later his profile as an award-winning comedian and Karl was only encouraged to speak more because of his eccentricity. Steve had always wanted to do radio, which also explains why he's usually the one who tries to keep the show at least somewhat professional.

[@BenAdlard]

That's so true about Steve

[@Nick-pk4sq]

Did that go out?

[@KubbsWickedSoul]

“I think they call it The Tropical Blackpool.”

[@justinkline8437]

"A lot of people don't like Lambchop. They don't like the way he sings." "That's the reason."

[@Raven-Claws88]

"The ice arrow's the only way" haha I love the debate about the best method of assassination!

[@NiallSlimDrew]

“No I didn’t mean to buy this though!” What did you mean to buy? “...keyboard”

[@mcharles1814]

'You're gonna get speak badly.'

[@WollongongWacko]

easy for you to say

[@GooglyEyedJoe]

0:54 - "It's not good for you that look at yo-youb-youv-you've not you can't breath properly in the diaphragm so you're gonna get sp-speak badly." *Laughs* That's perfect xD 19:54 - "If you shave a Tigers 'ead" (That noise that Ricky makes xD) "Heuuhhwhh...woh woh woh woh...woh. Right, ok, you've gotta treat that sentence with a lot more reverence than you did, think what you're saying, if you shave a Tigers head?" "Not just its head, it's whole body." "Oh soh..sorry, I thought you were getting weird."

[@HopeVJustice]

[@WollongongWacko]

still brilliant, cheers

[@lisasou95]

Sometimes Steve dumb it down for the other two idiots.😀

[@NiallSlimDrew]

Perfectly written. Well done 😂

[@markhoyles7245]

Yea course yea the ah, the narn ellevan

[@HopeVJustice]

34:40 :D

[@LittleWittleKitty]

😂

[@laurencesmith4997]

Love these guys. Been listening for years

[@justinkline8437]

"I shaved a tiger, and it's still stripey. Get out of here!"

[@WollongongWacko]

Hahaha! yes! I need this tee shirt

[@johgus96jg]

Karls american accent impression XD

[@HopeVJustice]

24:00 "Oh wow that takes us nicely.. that's a lovely link.. that s.. thing about you said about playing a track...!?"

[@HopeVJustice]

+ your dad Easy tiger, I'll have to hose myself down if you keep up that dirty talk! (; Have a good one! ^^

[@deadmoney5580]

Ricky perfectly describing vlogging .

[@Jimov]

The interaction about kicking the dogs would have made a hilarious Ricky Gervais Show animated moment 😂

[@trapgod9690]

I would pay to get someone to edit every last screech ricky makes out of these these podcasts , only thing stopping it from being 11/10

[@bobbyaxelrod5959]

I think the movie Tenet finally beats Pilkboys for terrible audio volume differences.

[@barryoffeastenders]

Never understood the hate for Steve. His anecdotes are some of my favourite moments and it the whole thing just wouldn't work if it was just Ricky and Karl

[@KingKurt]

He’s the man.

[@akay0000]

25:17 I oddly appreciate how Steve pronounces the name Leon Czolgosz.

[@harry_page]

"As the president thrust his hand out for the shake, *_ZOGGOZD_* fired twice

[@derek5395]

How do you pronounce it? I think it's probably "Cholgoz" but I'm guessing. Suppose it depends on the shooter's nationality.

[@harry_page]

@@derek5395 I think it's "Cholgosh", it's Polish

[@MarkWhippy]

Karl sounded slightly happier in series 1. You could actually hear him laugh and smile. Then after working with Ricky he gradually sounds more and more down and monotonous.

[@Scallion_D]

Yeah. He admits he got sick of doing the shows recently in a podcast. He doesn't look back fondly on them, sadly.

[@Glozboy22]

Sadly, Steve and Ricky focused more and more on taking the piss out of Karl in the later series. They're more of a team here, it's hard to listen to the later ones.

[@Scallion_D]

@@Glozboy22 On my 2nd run of this now and I'm up to Series 3 and I agree, it gets a bit much at times. From Ricky especially.

[@MarkWhippy]

@@Scallion_D what podcast did he say that on?

[@KingKurt]

@@Glozboy22 Steve was fair imo.

[@HopeVJustice]

29:40 (Karl laughs at Ricky desperately trying to prove his point and failing) "Ricky never try and kill someone.. they'll catch op wi' yeh!" ^^

[@isaiahjacob6345]

“You’ll get can’t speak properly “ 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@bobbyhale7133]

Steve calling Grand Theft Auto 3 the wrong name when he first mentions it to sound cooler but then calls it by its actual name the next few times.

[@Scallion_D]

It's just a slip. It happens.

[@Sheza58]

I think he actually meant Gran Turismo 3 because he mentions racing

[@ocelotcake9359]

i was stuck in south America for 10 years after 9/11 all i could get in 2002 was them and saved me sanity because was my only source of English beside ps2 games.

[@bruhnorton8306]

Wow....10 years of your life stuck because 911 and you have PS2 and Steve and Ricky and Karl...God had your back? Good for you sir

[@Nick-pk4sq]

Naht true baby

[@ocelotcake9359]

@@Nick-pk4sq lol ok bro

[@ocelotcake9359]

@Nick-pk4sq ill do you one better look up Paraíso do sul Rio Grande do Sul Brazil we didn't have internet till wsy later had to use internet in Santa cruz do sul to download the episodes. De nada seu sabe tudo fdp Americano

[@lilme7052]

This sounds like quite an interesting anecdote....

[@justinkline8437]

Will they? Oh, I won't then.

[@thewildmitchell]

"Nah I didn't mean to buy this though - What did you mean to buy? Keyboard..." 2:41

[@charlesnelthorpe9252]

jesus christ they played "hate to say I told you so" by The Hives a lot. A LOT.

[@KingKurt]

Season 1 Smerch is the best.

[@c4rry420]

19:28 Tiger King???

[@Chackravartin]

The way he said they could just use stairs just made me lose it

[@WollongongWacko]

I shaved a tiger and it's still stripey, get out of here!

[@WollongongWacko]

still funny. how bout a time stamp

[@scottcox8861]

20:26 Eight months later

[@WollongongWacko]

Scott Cox this guy gets it, cheers!

[@G0LD3NF1RE]

I see Kar's thoughts about which weather it's best to die to has done a complete 180.

[@chriso3414]

Ricky said its 1:30pm and i looked and it is actually 1:30pm. thats weird innit.

[@mothrajenkins3874]

"It could lead to rheumatism. Drop and take me off."

[@BigEats99]

The most amazing fact is although they both tease Steve for the way he looks, Steve DEFINITELY has been with many more women than either of the other 2 😂

[@Scallion_D]

Well they've both been in very long term relationships that's why. (Ricky with his since 1982 and Karl since 1994)

[@rooty]

"Can we not make those thoughts racist or homophobic though please". Steve worried the listeners will use up all their material there.

[@zerb9461]

Ricky's dig at Sturgess at the end lol

[@arturobandini4078]

I'm always amused by Steve's pretending not to know the name of GTA 3. It's like when he pretends to hate "The Lord of the Rings".

[@Coconutscott]

i'm on my 3rd lap, anyone else?

[@WillieDangerously]

Love people trying to do American accents.

[@thedarksiderebel]

not as bad as the other way around

[@DovahFett]

@@thedarksiderebel Only if you aren't American.

[@derek5395]

Karl nailed it. I often refer to the narn eleven and the tropical blackpool.

[@1984ekul]

You’ve got to treat that sentence with a lot more reverence than you did

[@alfiemitchell3026]

“You’re gonna get- speak- badly”

[@n0rdicwarking]

60 pence tip on a steak dinner for two is pretty shameless

[@cboy8598]

19:30 Karl knew about Tiger King way before it’s time...

[@therealjeagles]

Oooh, not bright stuff, Rick. You've embarrassed yourself!

[@ENigma-um8zw]

19:35 is when the whole nucleus of the dynamic is created, lol history

[@kreskinkun]

Does this mean Steve technically originated Monkey News?

[@SteveSmith-vj6nh]

PS2 ....these are soooo old...which now means I am so old......sigh

[@Wookieeoo]

Steve Smith Just think 9/11 happened like a month before some of these

[@kygodragon4782]

@@Wookieeoo no it didn't, 911 was years after these.

[@Shifter22]

@@kygodragon4782 "9/11" was 2001. These shows were 2001-2004.

[@Shifter22]

@@kygodragon4782 No, im def NOT incorrect. You're an idiot. Play a record.

[@Shifter22]

@@kygodragon4782 😂 Btw the date of the show is literally on thee thumbnail.. And I've lived in NY my whole life... Im preeeeetty sure I remember when 9/11 happened.... You've embarrassed yourself, play a record.

[@jasoneaton4520]

15:10 l love Steve's humor here...he's more talented than we think.

[@Luke-yx5ve]

The most annoying thing about Ricky is when Steve starts a great joke and he takes over sometimes it's properly annoying 😂

[@Scallion_D]

Steve's so tight it's unreal lol.

[@AtnaRecords1]

"Rick would you give me 20£, then I'll shut up about it."

[@vincerabbit]

Classic episode

[@lisasou95]

When British doing an American accent they all sounds like Forest Gump😀

[@tomsevers2754]

tell that to Idris Elba bro

[@tottenham2294]

Tom Holland has entered the chat Tom hardy has entered the chat Henry cavil has entered the chat

[@lilme7052]

No they don't.

[@occiderisaethiopissa3702]

Henry Cavil, Christian Bale, Gary Oldman, Hugh Laurie, Kate Winslet, Andrew Lincoln (walking dead ,Rick).

[@DerekDerekDerekDerekDerekDerek]

Daniel Day Lewis

[@townzgl7289]

It's not a dachshund down my trouser leg...its a baguette

[@ILiKeH4rDC0rE]

I dont speak German, but I'm pretty sure the dogs are called Daschunds, and a Datsun is a car or something. This might be one of the few episodes where Karl makes more sensible points (i.e. escalators) than Ricky and Steve

[@mothrajenkins3874]

They're both pronounced the same.

[@jenanahulu]

um no they are not pronounced the same. Dachshund is pronounced like Dock-sund and Datsun is prounounced like Dot-sun.

[@northcountrybhoy]

Badger Hound

[@derek5395]

The correct pronunciation is "sausage dog"

[@capnhawkins]

I was driving my little scooter once, and as I was crossing an intersection at a stop sign, a police car pulled up on the opposite side, the side I was going towards. I cringed as I drove past it, because although the scooter is sold commercially, it looks like one of those knocked up things that someone could've put together in their garage and just thought "brilliant I can drive this around now" so I thought they might find it suspicious. And sure enough, after I went past it, I looked in one of my side mirrors and the policeman was doing a u-turn in the intersection and he began driving after me slowly. It was like that moment in Jaws when the jetty slowly turns around and starts coming after the guy in the water. So the policeman was driving behind me for a ways and I was just petrified that he was gonna pull me over, especially because with this particular scooter it was kind of ambiguous whether you needed a motorcycle license or not. But in the end he turned into another street, and it felt like, to reference Spielberg again, the part in Jurassic Park where the T-Rex stops chasing the Jeep. So I breathed a sigh of relief, figuring that the policeman was probably just checking if I had a license plate, which I did, but in hindsight maybe it was like the scene in Jaws where the shark appears to swim off but then surprises Hooper, like I was going to be ambushed. So yeah that's my little anecdote, feels like I'm part of the show. Aren't I such a badass guy on the sly.

[@bubbledmango1373]

“Would You Not Wanna Got To A Restraunt Where They Had Baboons Serving?” *Karl Quietly*: Been To A Few.

[@HookedonChronics]

Not sure how UK listeners interpreted the bit about tipping, but holy shit, Karl tipped less than a dollar on a full meal. Lol

[@luukeluketer1024]

Fuck your tipping methods........Its sucks........

[@HookedonChronics]

+luuke furtado you'll get over it

[@WollongongWacko]

luuke furtado do you want something old cold

[@lorenioooooas]

it's free money, take it or leave it. the meal is already paid

[@WollongongWacko]

iamhim No, but that's not what this comment section is for, so I digress.

[@edmunddonnelly3881]

34:40 I´m American, and that´s exactly how I talk.

[@kiteracer95]

Hearing Rick and Steve slag off the avalanches is traumatising

[@emilyj9497]

Karl is so money and he doesn't even know it!

[@shnoogums1]

Karl’s American accent...oh my god

[@danielf4324]

I'm not sure what came first season wise with curb your enthusiasm but a hell of alot of Karl's thoughts appear in episodes social fau pars freak books etc! Or just 2 great minds thinking alike

[@TheScientist0000000]

I love him, but Karl's not muchbof a producer. The levels are all whacked out, Ricky's laugh is speaker splitting, but you can't eve hear Karl's mike

[@skeleetoon]

Ricky's obnoxious laugh wouldn't have the same effect if it wasn't making your ears bleed

[@kenhansen8222]

As an American, I've never heard anyone ever say "butt licky".

[@shankieinthefridge]

4:06 my favorite radio guys don't like my favorite album :(

[@reinforcedpenisstem]

Isaac Asimov wasn't a Sir.