Zoey Talks About Mental Health - YOGSCAST JINGLE JAM - 23rd December 2017

[@maxboot2115]

Zoey is so brave, and it's wonderful that she got time to talk about things that are so important.

[@CadhlaCat]

Thank you for the talk about depression Zoey. I lost my older brother in 2011 (1 day before my birthday), who was my idol and pillar of reason, and have been battling with major depression and self harm since then, and still struggle to talk to anyone. I was left in tears after your chat, since I recognized so much of what you experienced and said in myself. I was also the cause for losing my cat in 2007. When I moved to Scotland I couldn't find anyone to take care of our cat (she was merely 4 or 5 years old, so still a young one), and no shelters had any room where I lived. With me having had to move to the UK, my only option at the time was to put her down, which I absolutely did NOT want, so I spent my taxi ride to the pet clinic in tears, and sat with her until she fell asleep in the clinic aswell, and still miss her so terribly to this day. I miss both my cat and my brother terribly much. I was home when my brother died.. and I heard him fall (I realized in retrosight), but didn't think much of it at the time, and didn't realize what the "bump" was in the flat, until our manager called from work, asking where he was since he didn't show up.. I am still waiting for a spot in a mental health institution.. (could be another year at this point). The local health system is not particularly great, sadly. Before I keep going on.. I just wanted to wish you and Fiona all the best, you are so adorable together, and I always enjoy your videos.

[@sphlish2]

How did it take me 4 years to find this touching stream 💖

[@Arteoux882]

i'm ready glad she did this actually: i watched live and it made me feel better about my situation.

[@birdbot02]

Zoey is the perfect person to talk about mental health and other life issues

[@CookingWithCows]

Yeah, it's like getting drug advice from a junkie.

[@McFwoupson]

@@CookingWithCows most drug users I know don't know anything about what they're using lol

[@thebutteredf1y]

Once Zoey started speaking of her cat... I broke. Because.... YES Cats were/are my iron rod to hold onto. Because through it all, every cat that has ever been apart of my life has made me get up each morning (even if it were just to feed them, I got up). They would listen to me, and comfort me. I may only just suffer from enough anxiety and depression where I can get medicated (I'm off meds at the moment) and I know a lot of people have it worst... but I understand it all as much as I can. The staying at home/in bed etc. I haven't been hospitalized, I am lucky enough to see such moments coming and have friends and cats to help turn me away from it. I'm miles from where I want to be, and even more miles from where the world 'wants/needs' me to be but people like Zoey speaking about it helps so gosh dang much. No words can express this, I only have tears to show how much this all means. Thank you.

[@hazellye8720]

I'm 40 mins through and Zoey you are so strong to carry on through everything.

[@Dorma_]

Starts at 2:51

[@metaknight_ftw9233]

Zoey is the greatest member of the entire YOGSCAST. And I hope she knows we all love her.👍

[@jamieallan7727]

Zoey you are so brave, a couple of years ago I was in a really bad place and felt completely alone but then I found your channel and just watching your videos made the days go by easier thank you for everything you have done for me and everyone else

[@IznbranahlGoose]

I watched this off and on, finally finished it, and I can't hit the [Like] button enough. This was an amazing stream and I think it helped both those suffering from depression know that they're not alone and there is something they can do about it -- and helped friends of those suffering understand what they're going through, why they 'shut themselves off' and offers avenues for helping. -- Thank you again Zoey for doing this.

[@jessebryntesson8983]

you are amazing zoey, i respect you so much and believe you have helped so many people with this x god man SO much respect

[@bertss10]

I loved this stream. I think there were 3.5K solid viewers who were there for every second of the last hour of the game. I think you helped at least half of those 3.5K people that day. I'm buying this game for a friend of mine. I won't buy it for myself. Your stream was enough.

[@dylandavis7028]

this made me cry in 2023

[@maelstromx6462]

This is easily the most powerful stream the Yogs have ever put out. I am struggling with the same things, going through the therapy now. It took me until I was 30, but here I am finally pushing through and trying to make those positive changes. I have directly experienced BPD, too, and I can be more compassionate as a result of it. The intrusive thoughts are the absolute worst. CBT and DBT have been amazing. Thank you for this, Zoey.

[@hazellye8720]

I can't really fully watch this, but it's great that you are talking about it. More people need to address mental health, and it's awesome that you are.

[@tommybrady3821]

This stream was/is beautful. You're so strong for fighting this never ending battle

[@___-me4iq]

32:04 I stuck around. I watched the stream and I've watched it 4 times since it was uploaded, and I've figured out I was trans, lesbian, and autistic since then. I've also fallen in love with the light of my life, and yesterday I started the coming out process with my parents. Thank you, Zoey and Fiona. I might have had all of this in me all along, but watching this stream, spending my childhood watching your videos, it really helped me.

[@Davidofsmeg]

This was a very emotional stream. Thank you Zoey.

[@chromaphasia453]

Oh man zoey you've been through some tough stuff, but wow, good on you for being brave for 1. Pushing through all that stuff and not giving up, by pressing on enough to make it out the other side, and 2. Being able to talk about it, I'm sure you're helping so many people by inspiring them through those tough times

[@Mitch3215Gaming]

i feel so bad for missing this stream, it really hit hard for me

[@nicnac-chan9095]

yeah same

[@emerald_headz4900]

I started crying with Zoey when she started talking about her cat, because I lost my cat about 3 1/2 years ago, and I really miss him.

[@ingmarins]

before i dropped out of university, i too had difficulty getting out of house to actually attend. it didnt help that when mom asked if im studying, i said yes, and she would sarcastically say "no way" im studying now again starting from the first year

[@LustyDwarf95]

I'm so happy you did this sream Zoey, it really helped me understand a bit better what you've gone though, although as a guy I'm not aloud to have problems or feelings due to our culture. but watching this live really helped me. Love ya Zoey :)

[@dylanl2368]

mickyy Incubus wow your annoying, who's stopping you dude

[@Flashbatninja]

@Dylan in a way, arent you right now?

[@LustyDwarf95]

Flashbatninja hit the nail on the head there m8, think I'll just leave my comment to see how many more of this one there are out there

[@Arteoux882]

sexist societies hits both ways: i feel you bruv

[@funkyboss007]

I get your point but calling them annoying is ridiculous and uncalled for.

[@jaken.2748]

Zoey is so brave and strong, we all love you Zozo, and I'm sure Ziggy is so proud of you!

[@suspectedpotato376]

I’m sorry but how could anyone dislike this?

[@thomasveenstra5147]

this was so insightful

[@primeneedles2905]

Zoey. I loved this stream. Thank you for sharing your experiences, and showing off this compelling game. I thought the high of drunken Civ V with bonus Red Alert was going to be my favourite Jingle Jam experience this year, but I enjoyed this stream easily as much if not more, for entirely different reasons. Thanks for keeping it real. Keep on keeping on.

[@plsdontfollowmeimgay5905]

This makes me love zoey even more I feel I feel I don’t know what to say I feel so so sorry for zoey she has been through so much in here life and I, I can’t even begin to imagine the pain and suffering she had been through

[@ivyhoneyy0]

i'm so grateful for zoey, she's the reason why i understood things about mental health issues before i realised i even had some myself. i was 12 when blackrock started and i discovered zoey, and between her and nilesey i learnt about general anxiety and social anxiety disorders and just kinda thought 'oh, ok then, that's an issue that people have' and continued to learn more and speak out online, hopefully educating others and making some sort of a difference (signing petitions to get the (UK, where i live) government to acknowledge mental health issues and sort out the funding, that kinda thing). eventually i realised that i also have some of my own mental health issues, mainly depression and anxiety disorders, from fairly early on in life. now i'm almost 17 and am waiting until i am 18, because getting onto the same treatments zoey had is incredibly hard anyway let alone for a minor (short of attempting suicide and getting hospitalised). you can't get recommended to the mental health services by your gp (i was told by a gp that should he refer someone, it was highly unlikely to get accepted), you have to go through the school, and in my school that means missing lessons to have these sessions. not to mention the fact that my history of self harm and low key suicide attempts would mean that the school would have to contact my mother, since they have to contact your parents if you are a danger to yourselves or others (my mother only makes my issues worse, not better). i'm in a much better place now, but it still something i cannot entirely manage on my own, so i'm just waiting to get on that 2 year waiting list lol. anyway, i don't know what the point of this was, i certainly hadn't expected to share my own story, but none of this (including and mostly the fact that i'm still alive and have felt the best i have in the past 6 years) would be possible without zoey, and she is a big help in her own right. here's to you zoey

[@ivyhoneyy0]

also, you can totally tell that zoey is and has worked so hard to be the person she is now, including being incredibly kind. she is one of the two/three people that are at the forefront of my mind when i think about who i want to emulate

[@godofclocks3296]

I wanted to stop watching this 2 Hours and 35 Mins ago but I just couldn't help but watch and think. The struggle are truly real

[@TheGiggadude]

Talking about waiting lists, the one in my area just went up from 9 to 18 months, wowee

[@Arteoux882]

really changes perspective about time, right?

[@SinisterSi718113]

I love this. I have depression, anxiety, and I believe a personality disorder as well. Unfortunately, I live in America. I can't afford to get any of this diagnosed, let alone get medication, therapy...

[@sammumoo8186]

Hey, not everyone needs therapy, just a person they can talk to. A friend, a family member, a mate at work or school... They truly care about how you feel and want to help you! And if you truly feel like they don't for whatever reason, you can talk to me, I'll try to be of some help cx

[@SinisterSi718113]

Thank you so much for the offer, but I've been struggling with this for 6 years. I've talked to a lot of people...parents, friends, even someone I barely knew who offered help. I wouldn't be here without them, but it's still really hard, and if I could afford it I think talking to a professional (especially for diagnosis and medication) is really the only place I can go to from here.

[@BadPurpleGaming]

I don't mean to be disrespectful, I'm just curious - how do you know you have a PD if it's not diagnosed? Do other family members also have it? Again, not suggesting anything just curious. I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

[@IznbranahlGoose]

I have a similar situation. I honestly don't know if I have a problem that needs diagnosis but can't really afford to see if I do. Some of what Zoey's been talking about before and during this game relates to me but I've managed to still be functional enough to do things like not take random days off work and not have anxiety breakdowns over minor problems like a couple people I know with mental health issues occasionally do.

[@SinisterSi718113]

My grandfather had one, thought he died when I was very little, so I didn't know him. And I meant to imply by "and I believe" that I'm not as sure about it as I am about depression and anxiety. Also, a lot of my online friends have, and have been diagnosed, with PDs, and I've talked to them and compared symptoms and such. I was very sure a few years back that I specifically had BPD, which is what most of those friends have, but I no longer think so, so I'm more weary about saying that I definitely have one.

[@34toony77]

Hey if you want to hear waiting list times heres this one for you...My diagnosis for my autism on the isle of wight, and in the deep south of England is 2 and a half years, they recommended and said if I wanted a diagnosis by the end of the year I had to go private...so I did, it was shitty giving them cash for an assessment but it was worth it, but waiting 2.5 years I couldn't even imagine, it was painful waiting 4 months on private let alone 2.5 years

[@Docklead]

I hope it was worth handing out money for someone to tell you that you supposedly have something wrong with you.

[@MzyraJ]

To people wondering why bother getting a diagnosis (of anything ongoing), there can be several reasons. One can be for yourself - sure, you may THINK you have , but symptoms can vary between people and you can find yourself thinking 'BUT WHAT IF...', so being told by somebody with knowledge and experience can put your mind to rest and stop you worrying further. Otherwise, sometimes you need it for other people, especially if you require some form of help. For instance, I've been dealing with a chronic illness for several years and struggling through work; they tried to cut me some slack, but they needed me to get a diagnosis or something from a doctor so they know what I'm dealing with and what's reasonable. If you don't have a diagnosis from a doctor(/equivalent) people will doubt you even where it should be obvious. Fortunately I managed to get my condition diagnosed last week and I cannot tell you how relieving it is just to KNOW and UNDERSTAND what's happening to you, not worrying that maybe it's some kind of brain tumour or something even though you know it's unlikely... Diagnoses are not perfect (sometimes they turn out to be wrong further down the line), but they can be really helpful.

[@Docklead]

MzyraJ What’s your diagnosis?

[@34toony77]

1) I wanted awsners to why I had meltdowns in social situations and to why my social development was behind everybody elses and why my senses were stronger than everyone elses 2) I was going into university and wanted to right support and the only way they give it is with a formal and professional diagnosis, 3) I wanted to know if what I had is genetic 4) I was sick and tired of my old schools telling me I'm dyslexic and theres nothing wrong with me and 5) By the time I wanted to be diagnosed and an adult, I wanted to know what would of happened if I got diagnosed as a child and 6) I had an opportunity to get diagnosed in one of the best places to get diagnosed in the UK, I took the opportunity with both hands...that explain your awsner?

[@MzyraJ]

Dan Franco Well the main thing they figured was non epileptic seizures (which I was having every day the past few weeks), which is neurological and actually they don't fully understand yet, as it's something to do with the nervous system (and/or possibly its connections to the brain) not functioning correctly but not being damaged (as far as they can tell). There's a lot we still have to learn about the brain and nervous system. The neurologist gave me a link to a really good website (neurosymptoms . org), which also talks about other symptoms that have the same kind of root cause, which would explain the months of severe IBS that I would randomly get for no apparent reason for the past few years. Unfortunately there's no cure or even medication for it besides trying to manage some of the symptoms, but just knowing why (so I'm not freaking out that I have like CJD or something) and being able to give other people a label they can work from is super helpful.

[@Fredtheevil]

interestingly the closest ive come to telling someone when im feeling down is telling them that i wouldnt tell them this stream made me realise

[@BuxtonsWater]

Zoey is the best.

[@grahamwaterhouse7038]

dang 12 mins in and you already have me in tears, I was diagnosed 10 years ago as well, I ended up finding my ex fieance 11 weeks pregnant after she had fallen down the stairs behind the door, and it broke who I was even now am not even that 2nd person either now today, I was told I've sever depression, stress induced psycosis, short term memory loss and aspbergers syndrome at the age of 18, I became homeless liveing on the street for months, tried many time's to join my little one, I was in hospital for 8 months, completely alone as my mother and father can't even relate to the child they created, even now I've lost 3 familys, biogical and two partners, and if am honest if it wasn't for my friend kris I'd not be alive, I wish I had your luck as I'd love to work as sitting in this house alone for 10 years am just not aloud to, am still stuck in that dark place I just can't find that light no matter how hard I've tried eventually everyone leaves me behind for being as broken as I am, I've tried therapy, tried alsorts to make things better even tried to live stream myself so I can't take myself outta my cold, quite and logic self, and for many many years I don't even view myself as a human anymore, am more like a hollow, a monster with no heart, or a homunculus a human created threw alchemy, unable to understand what regular humans do or mean alot of the time, only time I feel even real now is hunting in monster hunter, not even as the male I am, the rush and feeling of hunting a binary code gribbly is the only statisfaction I get anymore, and even at that I still don't feel human, am glad you've found happyness, but I'll always be stuck in the darkness of twilight and I've aceppted that, just my fate to walk in the night than the day, don't give up your happyness, as I gave mine up a very very long time ago and its still never returned

[@FeyKitsune]

[@filipjadownicki6790]

Really wish I watched this live. 2 days after this was broadcast I started self-harm.

[@Stroopwafe1]

Just know that the twitch chat on Zoey's streams is the most supportive chat there is. And you can talk to people there who will listen and genuinely care for you. Lots of love! 💜

[@filipjadownicki6790]

Thanks guys

[@RaymondSynold]

So much love for this.

[@AllyDarkWolf]

i'm mid way though the stream during the game part and it kinda scared me when it came up with the part about how it becomes natural to beat yourself into submission. because it's scarily true. Edit: I'm at the end of the stream thank you for being truly amazing

[@tessaclapper726]

1:17:55 messed me up when i went to public school. Learn, study, test, forget, repeat

[@drakeslot]

this is beautiful

[@Bread-gn9kp]

I wish I could have seen this while it was live...

[@jakeofyo]

This stream actually made me cry BibleThump

[@harrietgriffiths5002]

Negative Gaming BibleThump BleedPurple

[@Dmcallister171]

Thank you.

[@danielstec853]

Now I feel like an ass for missing this stream, it was beautifully meaningful. Thank you so much for doing this and happy days.

[@aughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh6947]

I knew Zoey is like one of those people that would help a lot of people with stuff like this. And overall shes a very chill person in general

[@eggboy8919]

I wonder if sort Will do another video like this for 2018 Jingle jam

[@SuperTamaru]

I actually had to stop watching at 1:15:57. It was too much for me to bear, especially since I know I have executive dysfunction (I can rarely, in the best case, bring myself to do things, even easy and mundane things), depression, generalized social anxiety, and an absolute fear of doing things wrong, among other things that screw with my head. I had already broken into tears when Zoey did, mainly because I can relate to some of it, and that I am a very empathic and emotionally sensitive person in general. I loved what I saw, but Please Knock on My Door is just too much for me to handle. Thank you so much, Zoey, for making this stream, even if I didn't watch it live, or didn't even manage to sit through the entire vod. It's important to me in my process of healing myself, and my mind, but also important to other people, who need this so very much. You're super brave, and you do all these things with Fifi, and the other Yogscast crew, like the DnD stuff you spent like 7 hours doing (which was amazing by the way). I know nobody on the Yogscast really monitor this channel, save for the uploading of the stream vods, so I should probably send this as a message directly to you, but that'd be hella hard. Maybe I'll be able to do this at some point, or if someone else does, I don't know. Sorry for this wall of text, I went rambling for a little bit.

[@w5527]

I think this deserves more views

[@k3lpi392]

Oh this is too real x support x

[@Baleur]

You're so lucky to have Fiona....

[@k3lpi392]

Oh this is too real for me x support x zoey my girl

[@tessaclapper726]

What is the cameraman in the drawing?

[@harrietgriffiths5002]

Dragon Flame jurraksus (I'm not sure exactly how that is spelled)

[@bencustardin]

Lord Jaraxxus from the Warcraft universe. He’s an eredar demon and one of the Lords of the Burning Legion. I don’t know the if there’s an inside joke behind them employing him as their “cameraman,” but it seems like an appropriately quirky juxtaposition

[@samuellee6394]

1:54:30 Its STARWARS baby! I miss Blackrock chronicles.

[@gregorstanley3209]

Zoey proasheck! Pro at being amazing!

[@rebeljesus3470]

All through this all i want to do is to hug Zoey and tell her everythings ok, on another note, i find what helps with self half is writing on your arms, say "Get Better" like this song (not mine, just something i like, and i think is helpful, well, it is for me) kzbin.info/www/bejne/qnOXcqmaod9mos0 and i understand how she feels with animals, they are always such important things, they are always helpful, and it is really sucky when you loose them

[@rebeljesus3470]

even the silliest of things are wonderful, if they help

[@darian787]

Please someone tell me the game she was playing

[@BuxtonsWater]

Please Knock On My Door

[@mooberto]

You talking about Ziggy reminds me a lot of my cat....

[@nicomero6287]

[@jjaaamm]

Human points +50 guys

[@Baleur]

Zoey this stream made me fall in love with you, a little bit. If everyone could dare to be this real once in a while, the world would be a better place. Thank you. And i love how you play that game, just as it would happen in real life. Anyone else playing it would just try to "game" it and minmax, "gotta go to work lets win this bitch", but in real life, would you? No, you'd chicken out and just stay home. In my own real life, I also have a "Call Dad" option, I have it right now staring at my phone next to me, but the option is always grayed out for some reason. I just can't bring myself to do it. Sometimes your choices in life are limited, by your own self-imposed inhibitions and fears. I believe we really do have free will, but we do not have free will from ourselves, from our subconcious.

[@jjaaamm]

Can we not go outside together plz Zoey

[@AsterixCodix]

For God's sake... I nearly kill myself in November, and everyone and everything gets concerned about mental health. I get it, I'm not the only one, and this is something that happens quite often, but Jesus Christ's mother and both his father's, all this mental health stuff seriously seems to stand out now... Just, yikes... My life went so far down the toilet, that everything about mental health stuff, just stands out more than a 8 foot bloke, in a room of 2 foot dwarfs.

[@k3lpi392]

Oh this is too real x support x