[YTP] The Good, the Bad and the Fugly

Control of Congress is a lot of power. They're gonna have to earn it.
Music:
"The Good, the bad and the Ugly (Titles)" by Ennio Morricone
"The Trio" by Ennio Morricone
"The Yellow Rose of Texas" by unknown

[@ethanthompson1097]

"There is something wrong with Ted Cruz's face." "I think the majority of Texans would agree with that"

[@izzy4reel]

I lost it there.

[@notcrackerjack]

And we do

[@sailorskj9002]

You can do it Texas Ted

[@brandonveltri2825]

So I guess his face was just fine before the explosion happened

[@writwits5826]

I'm not an american and i also agree with that

[@unbubbletea]

"We will have the best fascism since World War II"

[@goobermagoob9160]

bubbletea we can only hope.

[@TheEGA4545]

*World War Twooooooo

[@randybobandy5538]

Goober Magoob fuck that.

[@littleblueriolu9093]

He's got my vote!

[@cutecommie]

Amazing delivery. Really makes you get behind his fascism!

[@michaelm9688]

"He voted in favor of a tax-tax, which I don't even know what that is" 😂

[@interstatehighwayfan_645]

If you get taxed you’re going to get taxed again

[@bulldozer3719]

Basically just Britain

[@Acypto]

“Consumer sentiment is like the sentiment that people have for consuming.” - Donald J. Trump

[@viggo8213]

*It's tough to understand*

[@talhahtaco2035]

@@viggo8213 is egg

[@almaw2005]

I wouldn't even be surprised if it was a real quote tbh

[@generalerica4123]

We live in a society.

[@saagabragi6938]

@@almaw2005 He's always wording his sentences like a retarded child. It's incredible that people look at that and think "sounds legit."

[@SupaStatic]

*WHEN THE E X P L O S I O N HAPPENED*

[@13CaptainPrice]

LupusAtraSicari I was on the ground

[@robinsigmund1133]

Politicians make the best ytps. They constantly try to sound so serious.

[@ceilingeye]

Especially trump because the crazy shit he says makes for a great edit.

[@WB_WRHD]

I also think since they talk so much about sensitive topics, dark jokes are abound

[@Polyglot_English]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/hZzSdn6Hgdx8rck **VOTE THIRD PARTY**

[@bobbinsthethird]

A tax tax

[@Filmshake]

A laffer curve sucking its own curve.

[@f0rm0r]

for every tax the government passes, it has to pay itself

[@Kurvaux]

I utterly lost it at “How it feels to drive drunk in Texas.”

[@brodied.6230]

"One of the wettest we've ever seen, from the standpoint of water." Holy shit lmfao wtf

[@DohEntertainment]

Ted Cruz's life must be a generic Michael Bay film. If he has to be prepared to be on the ground when explosions happen.

[@calebbrazier8495]

"It's gonna be like September 11th but with tremendous amounts of water." - Donald Trump 3069

[@A6by]

"This country was founded on fear and diabetes." Yeah sounds about right.

[@MarshalShayCormac]

Senator Cruz Wants To Tax Your Kitchen Tables

[@chadbot0129]

Don't forget his mom

[@MarshalShayCormac]

Should Be Titled “The Good The Bad And The Teddy.”

[@confusedowl297]

I love how Ted Cruz sounds so distressed when he talks about "the tax-tax"

[@ReccquiemBST]

How it feels to drive drunk in Texas: +car flies off a cliff+

[@georgeharrisonlover4300]

And magically gets back on the cliff!

[@Kurvaux]

Ben Stevens Yellow rose blasting

[@Kurvaux]

Flazzmucci The song. It’s named the yellow rose of Texas.

[@TheWunWhiteWolf]

When I saw the notification that The Citizen Brain uploaded a new video, I was on the ground!

[@GigaChadsAreReal]

...when the hurricane happened

[@ReccquiemBST]

That plane you were on must totally suck!

[@DlcEnergy]

...before the views blew up

[@georgeharrisonlover4300]

The White Wolf Were you on the ground in West Texas when the explosion happened? LOL!

[@ReccquiemBST]

BOOM!

[@georgestanley7175]

"the wettest we've seen from the standpoint of water"

[@AfterbrunchDelight]

"I was on the ground, when the explosion happened"

[@alanrickmanfan27agirlnotab71]

Lmao that "Don't fucking judge me" sounded unedited 😂😆 but omg hahaha!

[@Imperial8933]

2:35

[@zacharybond23]

I am Ted Cruz, and I approve this message.

[@goobermagoob9160]

Herald Of The Goldberg where did you get the inspiration for your murder spree?

[@zacharybond23]

@@goobermagoob9160 My murder spree? It only came from the headmaster of HoH Reversity and his helper, Mrs. Texas NuN, of course!

[@ripplerockcinema8035]

President Harry Truman reminded us that this country was founded on fear...and diabetes.

[@jamesondoane32]

Consumer sentiment *IS* like the sentiment people have for consuming!

[@InfiniteDeckhand]

It's tough to understand...

[@jeffcarroll1990shock]

​@@InfiniteDeckhandChina is now permanently China.

[@doobertscoobert]

I swear to god Ennio Morricone's songs can make anything badass.

[@SilverSpoonRiche]

"Spaaaaaace Fooooorce!" Oh GOD, I wish that was a splice and not just slowing down real audio! How is our reality more strange than a YTP parody of "When the explosion happened!"?

[@jamesclark976]

Technology has advanced enough to where a "space force" is not just a possibility but a necessity

[@SilverSpoonRiche]

@@jamesclark976 Yeah yeah, I know, Ted Cruz told us all about the "Space Pirates". 9_9

[@goobermagoob9160]

This is the best non partisan memery on KZbin. Never change Brain.

[@thagrammarnazi]

Goober Magoob Non-partisan = you spared my Trump-rimming feelings.

[@ThisisTechie]

I know right, most memes would favor one side but this I really great.

[@cutecommie]

You sure it's non-partisan? I get an anti-Republican vibe from them, actually. But it's not like a nazi would pick that up.

[@IsraelLuisGeerRivera-ff4cg]

Soviet Loli no it makes fun of everyone

[@petitnicollas]

@@IsraelLuisGeerRivera-ff4cg One more than the other. And there is nothing wrong with that.

[@thunderspark1536]

So many lives has been killed *Bad grammar detected*

[@Sonichero151]

But when the winter storm turned Texas to a freezing tomb..... *teddy wasn't on the ground for that*

[@akorn9943]

even when the explosion happened ?

[@jakemccarrey7734]

How it feels to drive drunk in Texas

[@jakemccarrey7734]

UPDATE: How it feels to lose the Texas Senate race 3:34

[@lifedecoded9842]

_sO mAny liVes haS beEn_ *_KILLED_*

[@TheWunWhiteWolf]

1:40 I need to go bleach my eyes now...

[@thecitizenbrain6152]

"Sorry you had to see that."

[@theconductoresplin8092]

@@thecitizenbrain6152 I nutted (Desperate Measures in desperate Times)

[@ladycheyne5607]

The White Wolf Don't forget to wash your mind's eye out with a jalapeno and hot wing sauce rinse😉

[@xX_Cringeinator_Xx]

It ain’t a Texas debate unless they are have a duel with revolvers in city hall

[@xshadionytpx7891]

This is one of your best lol hurricane florence came from mexico illegally

[@xshadionytpx7891]

I was a the funeral in dallas second bapists church I jumped into a truck when the explosions happend

[@aleyoakenshield5384]

Hurricane Florence came in from Mexico illegally. It's going to be like September 11th, but with tremendous amounts of water. When I got elected you had some people that said:"NOOOO GOD" but you had others that said: "NOOOOO!!"

[@logarithmmm]

Mexico-whoa

[@Lostmychill]

Your ytps are the only ones that can make me giggle like a school girl

[@jacobwaller92]

@1:40

[@tuckersbaby]

“How it feels to Drive Drunk in the State of Texas:”

[@fjLKA]

I had an series on Netflix opened up and I was ready to start. Then I noticed that the Citizen Brain has uploaded a new video. Looks like I'll be binge watching the Citizen Brain

[@Patches_Gaming]

"How it feels to drive drunk in Texas."

[@thomasmartin8917]

"I was on the ground when the explosion happened" Tedd Cruz

[@harrylewis80]

"When the explosion happened"

[@beerhoven]

How it feels to drive drunk in Texas... like launching an old SUV into orbit while "yellow rose of Texas" rapes your ear.

[@dotmp4353]

Times up, you have to pay your tax tax

[@GigaChadsAreReal]

1:09 that one brown guy smiling after Trump roasted the reporter XD

[@jubilantsleep]

Kevin O'campo lmao

[@sillygoose635]

how ironic, since not thinking is what is needed to understand trump

[@Kurvaux]

Kevin O'campo He was smiling at the camera. He was smiling before he spoke

[@blvckhxxd]

I laughed so hard on this video that I started coughing Especially on “34 separate pieces of shit”

[@stevenak115]

" hurricane Florence came in from Mexico illegally. It's going to be like September 11th but with tremendous amounts of water" I died... and knew this was going to be great from that point lmao

[@shannon510butno.3]

"MexicOwO"

[@tompeled6193]

0:00 (music) 0:26 Hurricane Florence came in from Mexico illegally. It's going to be like September 11th, but with tremendous amounts of water. When I got elected, you had some people that said, "NOOOOOO! GOD!", but you had others that said, "NOOO..." 0:42 What I want to do is abolish Mexico-wo. Consumer sentiment hit its highest level. Consumer sentiment is like the sentiment that people have for consuming. It's tough to understand. 0:56 I also think China is now permanently China. China China China China China. 1:03 Trump: ...like in a state of shock. Woman: I'm not thinking... Trump: That's OK; I know you're not thinking; you never do. (sad music; black and white on woman) 1:12 I've never had alcohol. I've just, you know, for whatever reason... Can you imagine if I had, what a mess I'd be? 1:19 Florence has been a big bitch: one of the wettest we've ever seen from the standpoint of water. So many lives has been killed. 1:36 He is not Lying Ted anymore; he's Beautiful Ted. (woman laughing) 1:41 Reporter: Welcome to the first Texas Senate debate. ("pre-intense moment" music) 2:04 (chiming bells) (drumroll) 2:11 Ted Cruz: Fuck every single person in this country. Beto O'Rourke: Senator Cruz has sponsored legislation that would have this country build a 2,000-mile wall, 2,000-mile high at a cost of $2,000. 2:22 Cruz: He's voted in favor of the Fuck Tax, keeping it broad, fucking farmers and ranchers and small businesses. O'Rourke: Senator Cruz has 200 pecans up his butt. 2:32 Moderator: Senator Cruz, how do you respond...? Cruz: Don't fucking judge me! He voted in favor of a tax tax, which I don't even know what that is. O'Rourke: I mentioned just a minute ago, "Members of law enforcement are part of Satan's plan." 2:43 Cruz: The police are risking their ass to protect my pecan-filled ass, but I think you are absolutely sincere, like Bernie, that you believe in... in expanding government and higher taxes and... (horn in O'Rourke's face) ... and I commend you. 2:55 O'Rourke: He's dishonest. That's why the President called him Lying Ted. (two loud horns in Ted Cruz' face) Cruz: You know, the images of of of of... Hold on; let me answer with a... Don't interrupt me, Jason. (two loud horns in Jason's face) 3:05 O'Rourke: There is something wrong with Ted Cruz' face. Cruz: I think the vast majority of Texans agree with that. 3:10 I had been there on the ground in west Texas when the explosion happened. When Hurricane Harvey hit this state, I was on the ground when the explosion happened. In my hometown of Houston, I was on the ground when the explosion happened. When Sutherland Springs saw the worst church shooting in the history of this country, I was on the ground when the explosion happened. 3:29 O'Rourke: Driving drunk, which I did, is a amazing experience. How it feels to drive drunk in Texas: (grand music over car driving off a cliff then reversing the clip) 3:45 Cruz: I was at the funeral in Dallas Second Baptist Church. I jumped in a truck when the explosion happened. O'Rourke: Listen; I could care less about squirrel sex. Cruz: If you want to see the vote he cast for a $10 trillion tax on my mom, ho to our website; it's tedcruz.fuck, but I'll tell you something: (unintelligible rewind). 4:03 O'Rourke: President Harry Truman reminded us that this country was founded on fear and diabetes. Cruz: In those 6 years, I have authored and passed 34 seperate pieces of shit. It was devastating; I was home with Heidi and my girls when the explosion happened. 4:21 Trump: And it's Donald Dump time. Again, Donald Dump has beautiful, beautiful big titties. 4:27 We will have the best fascism since World War II, but if Nancy Pelosi and the radical Democrats get control, they will try to raise your taxes 2 billion percent, and they're gonna kill you Medicare, and they're gonna kill your Medicaid, and they're gonna kill your mom and dad. 4:48 You know what that is? That's the size of their... (bleep) Women's unemployment only fell to 3.6%, which is only 3.6%. 5:01 What the fuck. And now... -owow, it's time to vote. Go out and vote; otherwise you will be shot into space. Space Force

[@emPtysp4ce]

I keep coming back to this video for 3:32

[@isaiah8900]

"And now its Donald dump time" *game show music queue*

[@hankschroder5774]

HE VOTED IN FAVOR OF A TAX TAX AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS 😂😂

[@ayoutubechannelwhosubbedto968]

“So many lives has been killed”

[@emPtysp4ce]

Ted Cruz is one person and not several.

[@sdgdhpmbp]

Are you sure?

[@radiantarchives]

"Hurricane Florence came in from Mexico, illegally" And I'm already fuckin dead. You caught me offguard, that wasn't fair

[@ViriLiliac]

As a texan, I can confirm: Yee Haw

[@ShadowOfTheZone]

Subscribed at the train horn @3:03

[@eugenekrabs3375]

This is the greatest ytp I’ve seen in a long time thank you for this

[@Steelhead96]

I was liking this video when the explosion happened

[@ArghyadeepPal]

That permanent grin on Cruz's face though...

[@saagabragi6938]

He's a creep

[@Inhaleexhalelol]

He needs our kitchen tables for TEXAS.

[@dntertainment5435]

KZbin comedy cant get much better than this 👍🏼

[@jubilantsleep]

So many lives has been killed

[@theofficialsquidwardtentac5764]

* oooooonnnnnnnllllllyyyyyyy * 3.6%

[@Acypto]

What the fuck

[@valendir1]

You’ve earned a subscription from me. Wowee thank you ;)

[@nightmare-nightmarenightma1147]

That thumbnail is priceless.

[@MPIEMDRailfan4]

“I was on the ground when the explosion happened” You were in the ground when the snowstorm happened as well… on the ground in Cancun, that is :)

[@nexterpl3085]

"This country was founded on fear and diabetes" Don't forget the crude oil and wars.

[@thewhitesnowone1744]

"Florence has been a big bitch" Yeah okay my sides are in orbit

[@ninyaninjabrifsanovichthes45]

I was on the ground when the explosion happened

[@TheCronos275]

Thank you YT algorithm for recommending me this after O’Rourke announced his guv’na bid

[@wilberforce95]

I'm not voting for O'Rourke. He voted for the Fuck Tax.

[@user-wk3ey6wj4d]

Excellent work as always. It made me laugh when the explosion happened.

[@atlantic_31]

"Harry Truman, reminded me that this country, is founded on fear and diabetes" Well can't argue about that 💀💀💀🤣🤣🤣

[@ZoSo1973]

I subbed to you about 3 minutes ago and am already gonna turn on notifications holy shit these poops are some of the best i’ve ever saw

[@GamerGuy249]

Can somebody get Harper on the horn and tell him that his sleeper agent is malfunctioning.

[@JenMistress]

I love this! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Thank you so much for the laughs!

[@Mike-qj5vf]

your best work yet

[@selectionforsocietalsanity]

YES! Thanks for another video, Citizen Brain!

[@Fade2BlackMCfade]

The police are risking there ass to save my pecan filled ass

[@geckogeico2212]

"... Is only 3.6%, which I S... only 3.6%. What. The Fuck."

[@chrismodlin6262]

looooool the driving drunk part

[@noteshade]

Hot hot fire as always! Keep em comin'!

[@temporalforces2623]

I love this channel xD

[@jamesondoane32]

A fuck tax? Well now THAT'S something I can get behind.

[@leonsus9317]

This one might be my favourite. Next closest one is probably demented Dr. Phil, lol.

[@pegg5404]

Ted is such a funny looking man

[@FlameAdder]

Spaaaaaaaaace Fooooooorce was the perfect ending

[@Antiwokey]

this is amazing, Im laughing out loud in my office. everyone hates me !

[@patrickm2000]

Great video

[@ImmortanDan]

Seem that the Good and the Fugly have beaten the Bad.

[@jakespacepiratee3740]

"Go to my website, it's TedCrus.Fuck."

[@russiaball7447]

Didn't know that the life of Ted Cruz is pratically a Micheal Bay movie... Well, you never stop learning 😁

[@JPTECH8]

Impeccable

[@CryoKeen]

That was fucking amazing! Thank you so much!

[@dradmiral5224]

“Don’t fucking judge me!!” - Ted Cruz

[@KevinRegalado1117]

new vid before the midterms! yay!!

[@dylanlerch162]

funny stuff man loved it

[@Ash-zm1vx]

Does anyone wonder who is actually disliking these videos?

[@ninyaninjabrifsanovichthes45]

S P A C E F O R C E

[@Indignations]

No one comes close to Citizen Brain when it comes to mixing political pooping with classic movies.

[@80xlulz]

Damn it, I was expecting some Big Iron blasting. Also Ted Cruz looks like the spawn of Colin Mochrie and Quentin Tarantino.