All of these descriptions between the introvert personality types don’t really seem that distinct and unique to one another. The description of the different introverts seem interchangeable in any given social situation or season of life. Do you believe your personality is static all the time? Doesn’t different aspects of your personality come to the forefront depending on the social dynamics and familiarity? Honestly, EVERYONE experiences feeling misunderstood at some point. EVERYONE also experiences feeling out of place at some point. INFJ is not some unique unicorn of a person limited to a specific group. I believe being INFJ, INFP, INTJ, etc. are fluid ways of being. I mean seriously, everyone thinks and everyone feels. The way you engage with thinking and feeling changes as you age. Personality tests are interesting tools to use for validating your experience- as well as using natal astrology charts. None of this shit is definitive to any “type” of person for all of their life.

The INFJ door slam often feels shocking because it’s hard for others to believe that someone so kind and tolerant could completely cut ties. INFJs are known for their patience and compassion, often enduring mistreatment and allowing others to take advantage of their kindness. They become deeply integrated into people’s lives, offering unwavering support. But when they’ve had enough, they reach a breaking point. Without warning, they cut the connection completely, as if the person never existed. For the INFJ, this act is a form of self-healing, while for the other person, it can feel deeply jarring and even traumatic.

It’s always hard for me to feel vulnerable because most people don’t understand where I’m coming from or they want it that way but I have my own methods of doing things I try to explain to them but they would act like it’s just a phase that’s why for me just being quiet is the best medicine because I know they will come back around and ask me that they felt bad about it

Pissing off Sally is not the most efficient way. If you shove a process on Sally, Sally will prove to you that it isn't.

Hi. I need help. I'm here not because I'm one of you INFJ, but i have a friend I'll say who is INFJ. Let's be short ( one day he come to my house ring the bell and as he said didn't get an answer, i didn't opened.. What actually h happened is i checked my ring bell and it doesn't working at all, i came back to him saying truth that ring bell wasn't working and he said thank for your apologies. And after i said we coud arrange somehow again.. And he said i will have to THINK about..? What it means? Think for.. If he wants to meet me again or not, he didn't said yes or no.. I said ok.. It passed around 3 days since last conversation and i just came to his Facebook profile as he was usually posting a lot posts per day about life like smart thought. And i liked 2 of his posts and after 1-2 hours when he saw it i guess - he disappeared - i mean his account was deactivated and i can't see anymore his profile picture or posts and can't sent messages on messenger.. He deactivated all account because of me? For me it doesn't make sense. As on Facebook is another way just to block a person who you don't want and he can use his account i wouldn't see posts when blocked. Becouse you guys know this type if person better.. What to do. Can't contact him. Don't know what happened. Fell worried, sad

She use to be scarred ha ha. Happy Girl ✨💖✨. kzbin.info/www/bejne/f2qtaaSuYr91eKcsi=-iRCCf9i2mZWby_j

I am not a christian. I am a muslim ( who went through a faith crisis after discovering how ignorant i was and started my journey 10 years ago then chose islam ) Christianity never made sense to me for numerous reasons, though the main ones was the trinity and the divinity of Jesus peace be upon him, and what made if even worse is the fact even the bible doesn't support it . When you have a conversation with Christians about this issue they play all kind of gymnastic thinking then tell you it is complicated and that you need the holy spirit to understand it or that if it makes sense then it is not from God and i just have to follow it ( which is messed up) if you believe we are going to be held accountable and our eternity is going to be on the line for this then it should be clear and understandable not ambitious and non-existenting in the scripture you claim it is from God. God having a son is also a weird concept and funnily enough it is a pagan belief ! JESUS TELLING YOU IN THE BIBLE TO WORSHIP GOD only yet you want want to worship him. He never told you to do that. There are plenty of verses that displays the fact that Jesus was a messenger a prophet, not God. The concept of salvation, Despite the fact that the bible tells us that no children don't inherit the sins of their fathers and vice versa, we end up inheriting the sin of our father Adam, then God must forgive us so he doesn't do that, he cannot ( dunno why) he punishes Adam ? Nooo He brings his son which is also Him to die or to be killed in order to be forgiven !!! But God doesn't die ! So ??? He pretended to die ! Then ?? These are the main issue i have a long list ( like the fact that the bible is forged, the fact that devinity if Jesus was something decided later on , the fact that there are soo many contradictions in the bible and so on) Ps: if you ever read my comment, i hope you end up read the quran and doing your research on Islam. There is a youtube channel of this brother his name is Mohamed Ali ( the muslim lantern something like that check his videos ) Wish you the best in yout journey .

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Lot of my best friends are women 💖. Being from the trade I come from ha ha, can't relate. That said thanks for sharing ✨. Put a lot of peace in my heart from this video. ✨✌🏼✨. Your a very cool person and can almost assure we are Friends! Sincerely, HB

I think I'm a siren and I feel like I'm mostly attracted to charismatics. Something about a leader, is really attractive. At the same time, I like Dandy types also. People who can take charge of their life and be authentic.

22 seconds in! and i already super agree with everything u said, hitting the relatable spot a little too much mate , aha. Btw are infp's quite identical to infj ( cos everytime i watch an infj video its so similar to me and im infp ) !!!

Thanks for sharing I was so confused cuz I’m also an INFJ and I see repeating patterns 😮 and I don’t know if we INFJs see things differently then others

Thank you for this video. Everything is now making sense. I’m glad I’m not alone❤️

Well done man love a fellow INFJ talk 👍 thanks telling the story

The best video I have seen breaking down the differences with significant enough detail and explanations allowing us to likely draw better conclusions on what we, or our closest loved ones personality types are.

Really …..? 9:45

John C. Maxwell said, “Disappointment is the gap that exists between expectation and reality”! The love that’s wrong for you will feel inescapably addictive. The love that is right for you will feel undeniably calm. What’s not meant for you will always feel a little out of reach constantly striving never achieving. Constantly traveling and never touching down. I want what you have; communication the life blood of love and a cherry on top! I’d rather want what I don’t have than have what I don’t want. From an INFJ who can talk and dream and speculate and create and be content in a world of my making. Because a fly cannot fathom the size of the universe; like your ex could not see so maybe maybe I’m too much to handle too much to hold

I have both introverted and extroverted intuition and relationships are extremely hard for me

Small talk is not a waste of time. It's just a different form of communication. It's showing connection without the "load" of deep conversation. So as an INxJ I burn out in social situations. How do all these E types party for so long? Lightweight, smalltalk.

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Ever think your dreams could be prophecy? INFJ are highly spiritual. The Bible explains that thoughts come from the heart not the mind. Feelings are spiritual not physical.

I watched that bucket drummer's KZbin channel. There's another artist that makes techno music from scraps and pipes. Very talented 😄

Agreed. When I was in school, I didn't like the structure of learning and often zoned out or doodled which resulted in average grades. But when I dropped out in my junior year of high school, I felt better and I was able to graduate through homeschooling (4 years later...). Then I went to community college and felt free because I got to choose my courses and could do afternoon classes. It was really liberating. But because both of my elective professors disliked me, they discussed between themselves and decided to fail me... In Fictional Writing and Ceramics... Who fails at those classes?! Especially an INFJ... Because I failed two classes, my government financial aid was cut off as per the agreement. I could no longer afford the tuition and had to drop out of college... Now I'm working a 9-to-5 job to make a living...

This is tear up my heart.. I was almost die in emergency room and I encountered God. It's not a halutination because I can feel He hugged me and even speak audible : I'm your Father. And I am healed!!! And I saw so many evidences where Jesus healed people and delivered them from demonic spirits. I heard you talk oftentimes about religion, but Christianity isn't about religion but it's about relationship with Jesus. And it's not just a feeling goosebumps but more than it, so many things happen and it's not accidentally connect each other. I got up at 3am,, I feel electricity and hot all over my body and I heard the voice you are the chosen. But I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable, I understand how you feel about - - - like your mom treat you with prayer deliverance oftentimes and at the moment you don't really experience Jesus intimately ( I'm sorry I didn't mean to judge you) But as I watching here, I will pray for you

I'm an INFJ Enneagram 1w2 I can feel people emotion and I care their feelings but in the other hand I want the tasks can done well too. So everytime I lead team I always set up a space where people can come to share their feelings and I love to encourage them.

Even with aquaintances or work colleagues, notice how many times you start the conversation, ask questions, say their name, greet them or say goodbye. Then note how many times they do it. Step back and give them a chance to do the same. If they don't, don't make the effort. As an INFJ, save your empathy for those who have empathy for you

Do you know Marty Glenn (INFJ) ? I think it would be interesting to you to watch maybe some of his videos.

I liked listening to this, for I enjoy meaningful conversations. Life can be like small talk, doing things without alot of meaning or purpose. I always wanted to be like Melanie from the movie "Gone With the Wind." Not a people pleaser but a life where i make a positive difference in someone's life. Where it's natural to help, not stressful. Also to enjoy nature and simple pleasures, like ice cream.🙂

When you talk about the big church in Alberta, are you by chance speaking about Beulah Alliance in Edmonton? So much of what you stated sounds exactly like that church. I was a member there for many years and I can definitely relate to the agenda of worship only.

I was 100% with you until the end when you say men shouldn't have female friends if they're going through rough patches with their current partner. If the man is devoted to making their romantic relationship better and they are talking to a good friend for emotional support (with boundaries and no secrets from spouse) then having that emotional support or friend seems like the best thing that could happen to the relationship. You said women feel overwhelmed by the fact that they have to be their partner's sole emotional support, so maybe more spouses should encourage female friendships for their husbands. I'm in this situation right now and it is hard sometimes because I grew up believing men and women can't be friends but I've now seen how much better my partner is doing, mentally, since he has become best friends with woman. Nothing is a secret and he and I are doing better than ever because he's like you. He wants more emotion in relationships and all of his male friends were dumb as bricks when he actually reached out for support. (Sorry that's mean but they truly were horrible) He's always has female friends and my friends tell me he's an anomaly in the way they can even be friends with him and not get weird guy creep vibes. I think I'm starting to feel grateful that I don't have to be that 100% support for him because, honestly, it's not even possible. Maybe this is why so many relationships don't work. It becomes too mom-son like. I love your video. It really helped me see some things more clearly, even if I came to a different conclusion. But hey, that's what being human is all about! You sound like an amazing father also, so kudos to you. They're lucky kids to have a dad that's so introspective and constantly considering the impact of how situations are handled. Good man. 👍

Okay, I admit it, I do play the advocate.

I have a dark side? 😅 Being an optimistic is akin to being high vibrational, nothing comes to those who are not high vibrational. I choose to put all of that on the shelf and live my life day by day, staying happy within myself. I love my alone time, I love my time with those I love, still I recluse. I avoid people who violate my need for privacy.

Um..after someone said something akin to "eye raping," I had to make a conscious effort not to hold my gaze too long. Lol, just another thing to worry about! It's a balancing act, like most things in life. But this is why social interactions can be so exhausting for us. In our own nooks alone, we can simply be. As far as trauma, I definitely feel there are major events that occurred early on that taught me to be hyper vigilant in noticing changes, for changes equal impending turmoil. For many individuals that may not lean to their inner scapes and sensitivity, upheaval may be easier to handle. But for those who are born with sensitive natures, emotional jolts may have a heavier impact. I am 41 in a few days and see what an extent instability contributes to my lack of safety and insecurities in personal relationships. It's been a learning curve, but being a middle aged Infj feels like surviving a bit of a war. And yet, remaining childlike, as we did not experience it properly, finally able to come out of the shell of trauma, but now removed from peers..except for beloved infjs who understand. I empthathize with your maneuvering of the stare and am reliving many moments of when I got looks of "ick" and I'm feeling rather bad about that... but only to teachers or doctors, lol. Close friends eventually live with it, as your girlfriend does. Thank you for your videos, it's always great to see people on the same wavelength.. the cadence is familiar, the consideration and reflection of you two is very comforting! <3<4<5

" I never believed in Christ, therefore have no interest in learning His teachings. I was there for all the wrong reasons and was disillusioned by PEOPLE." I fixed it for you!! 😂

I'm an INFJ (22M), and almost all but one of my close friendships have been with women. Someone else's comment perfectly articulated my struggle with one particular female friend, who I mistakenly thought I liked in a romantic way. I wasn't used to that level of emotional closeness and intimacy in my male friendships, so I leaned into that friendship way too strongly and misinterpreted what was just a friendship with her. We are still amazingly close friends now, and she knows I had feelings (or at least I thought I did) for her back then, but I've been able to make some other close friends as well to avoid "putting all my eggs in one basket" which include one other female friend and a male friend. Although keep in mind when I talk about "putting all my eggs in one basket", I'm referring to the traditionally feminine role of giving emotional support rather than requiring it solely from her. I have and always will naturally be a giver not a taker when it comes to this sort of thing in close relationships with other people. Anyway, with this friend (she is an INFP for context), she didn't really have any other close friends with men or women, and so I almost felt like her sole source of emotional support which essentially meant our roles as a man and woman were reversed. She struggles to open up and be vulnerable and so I invested a large amount of my time and energy into coaxing that out of her. I would say the reality of male friendships for INFJ men is pretty bleak most of the time, but you can come across a rare man who provides what you've always had to seek out women for, and that bond will be one of the strongest you'll ever have for your entire life. You don't have to worry about the nature of that friendship changing with new relationships or circumstances such as marriage, and while some may interpret it as a gay relationship, what matters isn't necessarily what others perceive but rather what you know it to be yourselves. My current close male friend (ESTJ), is emotionally vulnerable with me sometimes but we have a very push-and-pull type friendship that doesn't feel like what I just described. He's the closest man in my life right now and I love him as a friend, but he definitely struggles to understand me a lot of the time which means it's not quite as fulfilling as I want it to be, but it's better than nothing. I'm only 22 so I have time, but I'm hoping I meet a man soon who reflects these qualities I need in a close friendship. Lastly, I also just wanted to point out, that because almost all my close friends are women currently, it actually acts as a deterrant for any women acutally romantically interested in me, as they think I'm already interested in one of these friends. So the sooner I can find this ideal male friend the better, as my chances at finding a partner will almost certaintly increase exponentially the moment I do. Anyway thanks for the amazing video. I almost related exactly to your experience of making friends as an INFJ man.

I think I’m a charmer and a Siren too. I guess it’s more of knowing yourself: your strength and hiding ur weaknesses. Observing human psychology and knowing Strategic actions are the essence of seduction ✍🏽

I FOLLOW CLAY ….. ‼️ 14:52 😊

Great speech Clay …! 11:42 😊

EGO 10:20

Anyone know a good video like this for an ENFJ? Or as an extravert, am I amidst a group of people who are t likely to make this kind of video? 😂

Thanks for the inspiring summary. I like how you bring those types to life and phrase their essence. Like with the charmer that is an expert with words and people, carrys people through conflict, focuses on one person, and deeply invests there. Especially the insight about keeping the sexual tension is very true for me. I think I am the charmer most of the time. I want to grow more into the natural, hence more child-like: curious, shares and listens openly, passionate, deeply rooted in their needs and wants. Of course I don't want to stop being a responsible adult, but I like to learn to let my inner children out to play with other safe people. Entertain ideas with others, express my feelings through singing or dancing and the like. I think the natural inspires me there. Similarly the Siren with their connection to the mysterious and spiritual may be fun to be around. What I would not like about the Siren is when they would keep me dangling instead of helping me cultivate my own connection to the mysterious. If they jealously guard their secrets, then I would be gone fast. Lastly, I would like to be a charismatic for the vision that I care for. I still struggle with that type, because I don't want to be someone who uses people and keep them dependent. Instead I would like to be someone who helps them grow stronger, independent, and become more the person that they want to be. There are still things to integrate such that I am confident enough to be that for others. Things like not overtaking responsibility still stand in my way. Thanks for the food for thoughts, I enjoyed the reflection on those seducers. I like the idea that seducers learn to put their insecurities aside to let their confidence shine. Let's get to work!

Thank you, really liked it 😉

im an infp and my sister an infj :)

As someone who more often than not was on the receiving end of TOO MUCH unwanted attention, I had to cultivate a way to put people OFF, which is very uncomfortable to say the least. Mind you, I consider myself pretty average. I think the “draw” was the ‘aloofness’ (for lack of a better word) that INFJs often embody. I am the type of very independent person who lives for myself, has made my own way, does what I want, and doesn’t need anyone else and I believe that itself may be a draw. Also, the “INFJ stare” may be mistaken as intense (romantic) interest by others, and since all of these things are unconscious, they are hard to control. Lastly, in my family, we frowned upon drama. No matter what, you laughed at problems, made things fun, and moved on, so I think people are drawn to happiness and humor. The “I don’t care” attitude also attracts like a magnet, which I think says more about the issues of the pursuer than the pursuee.

I think I could display interest in the way the coquette quality may. Not with a strong malicious intent. I may interact and ask questions to people, but I am not exactly interested in a relationship in any form, friendship or otherwise. It is more based upon the interaction experience, then, over time, on creating a reliance and trust, from my side at least, and establishing a long term interaction, and, if I feel that is an option, lastly the possibility of a more personal relationship. If they are continuing to interact with me initially then that's okay but, if they show more interest thatn I might want, then I can draw away for periods of time, due to my communication methods and how I experience overwhelm from sensory inputs. I do eventually come back and interact in small ways and then potentially interact consistently again, but I can follow this pattern and draw back. It can follow periods of months and years where I withdraw, at least from an inquiring approach. I also recognise the suffocater in myself. I don't think this happens for me exactly as outlined. I don't believe I smother with guilt, and I don't believe I adopt others interests in such a strong way. But I can have a strongly directly attention upon what they say and how they experience things. Due to my directed attention I may have many thoughts and ideas based around that and follow the charmer part where I find the others worries and try to support and give focused attention. I heavily deflect attention from myself. I avoid to argue or fight, and I instead look for ideas and to discussion in a broader sense and make suggestions. I also don't believe this is with an objective to receive anything more than a consistency in conversation over time and it is neutral. I think I choose more often to spend time around people with qualities similar to the charmer, those with intense attention and interest in finding out others wants and desires. They don't argue, they smooth conflict and insecurity. But instead of me wanting more from the relationship, I really worry that the other wants more from it. It isn't attractive to me if there is a sexual element. For me, I am reluctant to interact further and share more of myself romantically with them. I am generally wishing they will remain in this moderate, constant, neutral, friend interaction. At the same time, I slightly dislike and hold resentment toward that attention upon me, as I prefer to deflect the attention. This is also linked to processing challenges and an overwhelm experience I have from continued interaction, verbal and text based. I can see that I find it interesting to interact with people with natural qualities and the childlike interest. My parents are heavily like that, with innocence and authenticity, but without any aspect of needing any help.

Hey Clay! This comment is a bit off-topic, but I wanted to say that I really love your videos. I'm an INFJ from India and i found out that I am an INFJ about two years ago. I'm a 17-year-old male, and it’s getting tougher each day to live my life properly because there’s literally NO ONE who really understands me. 😭 For the past 2-3 years, I've been in a kind of depressive state and always low on energy. I recently found your channel a week ago, and after watching a lot of your videos, I felt truly understood. Just listening to you talk makes me feel like there are people in this world who get me. Also, one thing I have to say - when you and your partner Lexi talk with each other, I'm like, "WTF, how can two people be so connected?" I’ve never seen that happen before; it’s my first time witnessing something like that. It’s almost like you’re both piercing into each other’s souls. The level of understanding INFJs have for people is just crazy. I know I'll work very hard, day and night, to find where I really belong - a place where people who I truly love and who truly love me. I really love you and your content. Let me know your thoughts on this. Keep it up ❤

Play, always admired your videos, production quality is spectacular. Are you able to share with us your audio and video equipment you used to create your videos? And thank you for today’s content. Very fascinating.

God does not use seduction in any way shape or form to bring about His will. Seduction is a satanic strategy used to deceive people into carrying out a satanic agenda. If you are a believer, then don’t use it or be used by it. Be advised.

I think I'm a natural Dandy. I believe that as an Infj I can also decide to be any other type, depending on how I perceive the person I'm interested in to be.

Logical fallacy of the atheist nothing created everything