@@derek7959 I really appreciate the positive comment man. Means a lot. I’m glad you’re doing what works for you. That’s really all that matters! As for the video, this is actually all stuff I did in my 20’s too (just saying). Just curious. Where did you get the hard and fast rules for attraction? (This only applies if you’re white, or have tattoos, etc.) I’d be careful speaking in absolutes! That would be like me saying “this only works if you’re 5’10 or taller with straight teeth.” I guess for me, I always knew I had certain disadvantages but I didn’t give af. I was going to excel in every way I could (looksmax, game) and create so much volume that I’d eventually find what I wanted. I was relentless. People think 1000’s of approaches sound like bs. I think that’s hilarious! There’s no glory in approaches! Those were the free throw shots after practice. We were about that life. We’d go out 3 nights a week and approach AT LEAST 5 girls a night. Do that for years and years and you cannot help but sharpen your skills. But people don’t want to put in the work. Anyway, I share all that to say that I don’t believe in these arbitrary rules. These percentages are not truly measurable or reflective of any social science or psychology. So instead, I believe in maxing out your look, learning game, and putting in so much fucking volume that you can’t lose. Sorry for the rant, ha!

@theharlowmethod Hi. Thanks for the reply. What i said is true in my environment ( Im in Australia with darker skin, 6', athletic average looks). Its all about looks and white is at the top of that list, followed by tattoos, beard, regardless of her demographic but 10x more for asian and women with darker skin. All the white guys are almost a clone of each other coz thats what all the women respond to. Ive experienced this selection criteria personally, watched other friends and heard and read about others. It all matches and it wasnt just me. When you dig down and understand womens psychology, its consistent. Thats a whole new can of worms. I could , and have done what you do, and keep approaching and create volume. I maxed out looks but , Im not white, never getting tattoos, and clean shaven, so unfortunately 3 strikes im outta there. With all the effort, time and money, I realised that the return was really poor, for 100% effort i got less than 1% return. Fat or old or single mothers or all of the above - 2 or 3s at best. The 5s and above would acknowledge you so that they could use your time, money and energy to help them attract the white guy they actually wanted, could have been shorter, uglier, fatter and broke. So, i accepted reality instead of delusion. I took the time, money and energy I would spend approaching women and reinvested into learn new skills, upgrading my existing skills, and applying to business and my interests. The return i got now was 200 - 800%. I made lots of money, accumulated lots of assets, learnt lots of skills, picked up lots of hobbies and had complete peace doing it. I can now do lots of travelling , locally and o/seas and experience alot. Women approach me in other countries. Locally if i want company (rarely) i could easily pay for it. This life works for me, but its not for everyone. Downside is this life while successful can be very isolating and lonely for many. It isnt for me. I have so much to say but will leave my rant there. Thanks

@@jim6070 yes! Good stuff!

@@Lavon78 ha! I’m glad you enjoyed that. The wild includes all places that are not meeting online, not just places that are actually wild 😂 Also, not the point of this video, but in my coaching I really harp on not saying things or repeating phrases that are self defeating. Ex- “I’ll be single forever.” Words have power and meaning and the more we say them, the truer they become.

@theharlowmethod Haha! That's true. I'm positive yet like my freedom after being in a 22 year relationship that was toxic. March will make 4 years single. Maybe 5 will be my lucky number 🫶🏽 Thank you for your guidance.

@@mickcoulson6188 that’s just my style man! I’m definitely not a posh boy or a suit guy (unless it’s a wedding, but I clean up nice haha). I see some guys who dress up in suits for their KZbin videos. To me that seems corny af, but to each their own. I’m going to be my authentic self and some people will take it and others will leave it. I’m chillin either way.

@@the.living.man. thank you that means a lot 🙏🏻

@@Martyn_Wolf 😂 my guy you’re giving me way too much credit. Never even heard of the steeple position. Maybe confident men just have confident posture idk. But this flirting technique works regardless. You should try it. I promise not everyone is out to trick you. Your response and immediate dismissal of me seems like cynicism which is a defense mechanism usually rooted in trauma. Psychologists see this often. You have to reject me immediately, otherwise you risk attempting this technique and getting rejected yourself. But you’re better than that. Try this technique and get back to me.

You're missing the best use of the steeple position- do this in front of an interested woman and all she can think about for days is which girlfriend she's bringing to the Eiffel Tower!

@@georgewalker3876 yikes buddy.

@@theharlowmethod I knew you'd say that about my comments being an "immediate dismissal response" 😂 Did I say anything about the content you spoke of in my firstcomment. Kindly re-read first comment.

@@georgewalker3876 The hell... I don't know what you're on buddy. That's not the thing I'm talking about lol

@@FallingShadow hell ya. There are lots of ways to get creative with this one. You know it landed when women respond with “oh ya???” Or “is that so??” That’s when you’re in!

@@murphxt7987 thank you!

@@njhotroder 😂 The audacity for one man (who probably gets no cheeks) to tell another man (who experienced dating abundance) that what worked for him is bad advice. Since you already have all the answers, why’d you click the video there buddy? Ya, that’s what I thought. Keep it moving 👉🏻

Ya for sure. And thank you for bringing something positive and productive to the conversation 🙄

It's called the south 😂

Another bitter basement dweller. Everything is 100% true, and idgaf what you think buddy. Thanks for your negativity. Now get off my channel son and ask yourself why you get so triggered by another man sharing his input. In fact, you should apologize to me for coming in with accusations that have no basis. Easy to do from behind a keyboard I guess.

​​@@theharlowmethodYou're clearly weak because you know damn well that you could correct your grandiose bs comment about thousands of girls..you fucking idiot! That's literally impossible, as others have mentioned. And you have no clue how stupid you sound and look; so you can take your shit video and shove it straight up your ass because that's where it belongs.

@@rustdawg7364 I’m glad you left this comment because it opens a couple strong conversation points. First, we should acknowledge that the older we get, the smaller the number of single women there are available. I’m not surprised to hear most the people in your league are married. Second, and more important, is the idea that a boat or motorcycle is necessary to meet or date quality women. This is something psychiatrists have identified about men. When we have an area of life we are discontent with, we try to fix it with external things. More money, more success, nicer things. In reality, usually the change we need to make starts internally. (Self esteem, social skills, limiting beliefs, etc.) This isn’t always the case. But often times.

I've traveled much of the country on road trips. Small town populations can be very obese, but Denver, Scottsdale, LA, and Austin all have fit and attractive people. It really depends on where you go. I've spent limited time on the east coast.

I noticed in Europe that nobody is fat, but nobody is really that fit, ya know? Like everyone is just right in the middle. I also noticed much fewer gyms and fitness clubs. This is just an observation; maybe you can speculate?

@@artistonaharley6229 what was his relationship like with that woman leading up to that? It’s important to build rapport before delivering compliments, especially in the workplace. What was the context of the conversation? The delivery? What kind of job? All of these things impact how a compliment is received. In any case, getting fired for a non sexual compliment like that is wild.

I agree that America has a unique culture that values success, but being good at everything is impossible, first of all, and also not necessary to meet women. And yes, there are many suburban areas, but I never found that to be a positive or a negative. I've successfully dated women in both. I'd be interested to hear how you came to these conclusions. Personal experience or research online? I've noticed online that a lot of men, especially blackpill, regurgitate ideas they see online but have not actually experienced these things firsthand. So, often, when I share my experience, and it contradicts these ideas, I find men get triggered or defensive, even though I'm speaking from experience while they're simply repeating ideas that some black daddy shared on his KZbin. I also think that it's better not to speak in absolutes on these subjects. And I will say that my experience has shown that American men have a much easier time meeting women outside of the US.

Also, as far as pay to play... meeting women is ALWAYS pay to play brother. If a guy can't afford to join a co-ed rec league, then dating should definitely not be his focus. Get yourself and your money right first, then focus on women.

@@theharlowmethod I've lived in a lot of places (I used to hold dual citizenship), 15 years in Western Europe and Asia, and the South, Midwest, NYC, SF and Santa Rosa, NC in the US. I'm forgetting a few. My personal experience is that it's easy to meet people when you live in a walkable city. Since a substantial portion of those people will be women, it follows you meet women casually even if that's not your intent. However, I'm not really your audience since I'm never single (even as I'm not married). I'm much more concerned with New Urbanism over getting dates. However, I wouldn't take much stock in personal experiences; I reject anecdotal experiences are unreliable. I know you wish to dismiss what I say as being unreliable if I haven't experienced it first-hand, but there's a difference between hearsay and evidence-based statistics. Thus, you should absolutely trust STI transmission rates put out by the CDC (center of disease control) as a very accurate way of ascertaining who is engaging in casual romantic relationships. What all these places have in common in that their wealth markets mirrors their dating markets; we see a society that's shockingly competitive.

@@theharlowmethod I strongly disagree with that because it excludes too many young uneducated and poor men. Young men are bad news in every society if they aren't protected and carefully grown into productive members of society. So of course men should be dating women regardless of their finances; if young women see young men as what they might grow into instead of what they are now, then that's about right. I reject the incel movement as being unnecessarily hostile towards, well, everyone, but I also reject society and its laws for putting vast numbers of young men in jail at a rate that far exceeds other nations. It's almost as if the US hates young men and finds laws to put them in jail, yes?

@@langhamp8912 hmm, I think we're getting a little off topic with some of this last response. I concede that young men are much better off when they have direction and purpose, but I disagree that society is responsible for that endeavor. I believe in individual freedom and individual success. Nobody is coming to save young men. They're going to need to do that themselves. Following good role models is an excellent place to start. As for the idea that men should chase women regardless of financial standing, that idea can be wildly irresponsible and inhibit a man's ability to invest in himself. Dating is expensive, time-consuming, and distracting in many ways. If a man is out chasing tail with all of his free time, and his financial situation is unstable, his career is in disarray, then most would agree that his priorities are out of order. Also, I'm not dismissing what you're saying as unreliable simply because you have yet to experience it firsthand. It's just that there also wasn't any supporting evidence. I spend time reading the research and the numbers on a daily basis and compare that against my experience dating and the experience of the men I coach. Thanks for jumping into a dialogue. It seems like you have a very diverse experience, and I'm sure we could go back and forth all day. I appreciate you taking the time to share.

Well said!

Thanks for adding something productive to the conversation here chuck. Hope you find the magic solution you've been searching for.

😂 I'm not even going to lie there's definitely some of that. It's up to the man to use best judgement. I met some quality women that way.

Yeah once they get HIV or another std they try to find the lord

High enough that I never found myself trolling videos on KZbin.. hbu?

Thank you for actually sharing your thoughts and giving me an opportunity to respond. It's productive to have a dialogue. But I strongly disagree with your entire take. First, I literally met my wife waiting to cross an intersection. It wasn't a big deal to open at all. I thought she was hot and said hi. It was comfortable and familiar. I'd spark up convos with women anywhere the opportunity presented itself. And my wife would tell you it was my confidence that kept the convo going. BUT, I'm sure women are happy to have you speaking on their behalf. Second, the co-ed rec leagues I joined are what we call "beer" leagues. Like you're literally playing kickball or dodgeball with a beer in hand. It's intended to be more of a fun social event. In all fairness, I could have made that more clear. But the reality is that your athleticism is not of much importance. Third, can you honestly tell me what you were hoping to gain when you clicked this video? I shared my experience. This is what worked for me. Why does that bother people? Why you gotta come in hot saying, "This dude is living in a fantasy world?" I'm a real ass person trying to share insights with other guys. What is so triggering about that?

That's nonsense. Who cares if she has a boyfriend? It's better to shoot your shot than to be kicking yourself later for being too scared to talk to someone.

to be fair he said "short term AND long term"

Short term I consider 3-6 months. Especially if it starts fast. You could be spending 3-4 nights together a week. Enough time to consider it a "relationship." Long term I consider anything longer than 6 months. Even if it's only 9 months for example, I'd consider that a long term relationship. No lie here. Thanks for your concern though buddy!

This guy gets it. Appreciate you paying attention man.

@@theharlowmethod me? agreed, too many people eager to drop a neg comment without the time to absorb. and i agree 1-3 months on average = dating, after that i call it "exclusivity", THEN "relationship" is next. and actualy i hear a lot of women calling shorter tineframes dating and relationships that i wouldnt be. im 56, ive easily had "dozens"

long term, 2-5 years min

what are night classes?

​@@samk7717 taking a course in a college, or subject without having to be a full-time student.

Thank for asking a positive/productive question man. Truly appreciated. I have always been afraid to dance, and honestly none one in my circle really dances either, so I cannot speak to this from personal experience. I think yoga/spin class could be a great place to meet girls, but gyms and studios are a big time slow play. You have to start with strictly friendly and social intentions, and see if chemistry develops over time. Otherwise, you'll quickly be found out as the gym creepo. That being said, I have done yoga and spin and both places had smoke shows everywhere. One other thing to note is that many of the women I've dated over the years attended yoga, spin, pilates, orange theory, etc., so I'm thinking the percentage of single women is rather low, which makes it even more important to start slow.

Dances classes are literally one of the best options as long as you are confident. Because you are always 1 on 1 with the woman without any work to do :D

What specifically is no longer relevant due to social media? Social media has been around since I was in middle school... I think I'm familiar..

I haven't spent a lot of time in the North East, but I'm not surprised to hear this. It's unfortunate that there are women who are extremely shallow. Not much low earners can do to overcome that. My experience has been more reasonable. I've spent most of my time in Colorado, Arizona, Texas, and California. I never had issues in these states. In fact, I thought Denver was the toughest. That said, I remember what it feels like to doubt my own self worth. When I was bartending, I assumed that I'd be overlooked by quality women. And often times I was. But I was relentless man. I put myself out there constantly and was willing to suffer rejection. And the truth is, nobody remembers all the rejections. They remember all the times you closed. And that's what you'll remember too. Don't get discouraged. Stay in the arena and the right chick will come your way.

I can really relate on your experience. I experienced the same stuff 100% as you. Especially this year sh*t went down hill. It’s as if someone put a curse on the dating game and it has never been so terrible like this year. I already thought something is wrong with me and I am going crazy. Nice to hear that I am not the only one.

Thanks for sharing all that. I think it's good perspective. I'd like if you could expand more on the thing you think I'm missing. Try to describe it. Let's drill down!

Emody.. portray... that's six of one, half dozen of the other. I think you get what I mean. Thanks for nitpicking though. Big cringe dude.

It should be, right? This nerd ain’t getting no play.

It's funny... I said in the video if you disagree, drop a comment, let's start a dialogue. But there's always that guy that brings nothing productive. Nothing but negativity. How about asking a question about a specific part of the video so that I can respond? These little negative jabs are truly beta behavior and benefit nobody.

You're the one who clicked the video big dog.. and somehow you're the authority on this subject? haha ya buddy. For sure.

@@xbavajee thanks man! Glad it was helpful!

🙏🏻

Buddy you seem angry. You clicked the video. You sure you’re not the one struggling? It’s okay if you are, but on this channel I’m keeping it positive only. Challenge me intellectually or troll somewhere else.

Solid take!

@@DabbaDay Nice guys always get so defensive. Just stating facts. Being agreeable has some positive aspects for sure. But overly agreeable people struggle to assert their wants and needs. They tend to get taken advantage of and over looked. Being a noodle doesn’t make someone a better person. Also, we should all be open to addressing weakness in our personalities.

⁠@@theharlowmethodno one is getting defensive here man. You’re not stating facts you’re stating an opinion. There is a clear difference between the two. This is genuinely bad advice. Making young men on this platform feel bad about themselves for being kind is despicable behavior. Everyone interacts with those around them in their own way. What exactly gives you the intellectual authority to suggest that being the nice guy is wrong?

@@DabbaDay Couple things here. 1) These are facts. Many psychological studies have identified qualities women find attractive (assertiveness, authenticity, etc.), which are qualities that nice guys lack. You can look them up [Sadalla, E., Kenrick, D., & Vershure, B. (1987)] [Kashy, D. A., & DePaulo, B. M. (1996)] [Buss, D. M. (1994)] Just to name a few... 2) Nice guys always confuse "niceness" with "kindness." I'm not telling men to treat others poorly. The qualities associated with "nice guys" (passiveness, predictability, neediness, conflict avoidance) are simply not attractive to most women and don't earn the respect of most men. Again, this has been well studied. So, I'm sharing facts, not my personal opinion. And you're correct. Everyone is entitled to act in their own way. Still, everyone is not perfect and should be open to making adjustments in social behavior if it helps them achieve specific desires (more friends, more dates, better relationships, etc.) Hope you can see my POV here.

@@theharlowmethod spoken by someone with a complete and utter lack of understanding of how scientific study works. Especially psychological studies. Just because a couple of PHDs wrote the theory in a book does not make it fact. I’m sure it’s well researched and I’ll certainly read one or two but that does not mean they are fact. Keep trying to profit off of incels. It may have short gains for you but it’ll lead to a dark place my friend.

@@DabbaDay haha buddy. How do you know what my understanding of anything is? Your tone is incredibly demeaning and full of anger. Idk why you're so triggered, but there many men (including myself) who have taken huge strides in confidence, communication skills, social skills, etc. because of this type of coaching. Not sure why that bothers men like you. And not sure what's "dark" about helping others. I hope you find your peace. Now get off my channel and troll somebody else.

@@alberto.kitumba thank you sir!