I love how relatable your videos are 😊

He looks like such a sweet boy ❤

I’m so here for Carlos the cinematographer 👏👏 your trot’s looking lovely! Very balanced and effortless right now!

what a beautiful boy (and girl)!

You look like such a different rider in a good way. He’s a much better do for you guys. But mostly you look like you’re having fun which what’s important.

Dang Carlos did a good job some people can not hold a camera! I love it! We need some Carlos cameos in the future of you showing him and him showing you!

Not being able to ride when you want to and because of external reason is really tough. I am happy for you that you got through it and can now live it. Falling can really affect your mental and confidence, it’s so hard to get back from it, it only needs one fall it doesn’t matter if it’s a bad one or not and there it goes. You are doing so good, thank you for sharing your journey! I love the idea of doing the trip away on a ranch and ride horses, I would love to do that🤩

Beautiful journey! Horses along with dogs, cats and other animals come from the Angelic realm - all about teaching us about love - loving ourselves and others. Thank you for sharing your story!

as someone else who started riding as an adult and had some confidence issues, have your own horse that you can consistently ride and build trust with is truly the best thing for getting over any fear and really being able to learn skills at a deeper level -- with a good trainer of course!

You deserve a horse

Wow, you have a great horse origin story! 🥰😍 I think a lot of people would’ve given up and not even bothered getting those lessons to go on that vacation. You’re tenacious!🔥🔥 It’s scary though, seeing how easy it can go from a horse working out to suddenly not be able to ride it anymore. That concerns me when I think about buying a horse one day. I need a much older horse to make up for my inexperience, but I could end up paying all that money and the horse gets lame for some reason. Its seems like such a big risk. 😢 I’m curious about this because I have ZERO experience (other than a few trail rides here and there), are the skills you’re working on now needed for trail riding? Or are you just wanting to advance your skills in English riding? Because I look at you and I’m like, you’re a pro, what more do you have to learn?😂

Thanks for sharing. For so many of us, horses are an addiction. I rode in pony club for 2 summers as a kid, but took 15 years off due to being a child of a single mom barely making ends meet. My life changed when my husband gave me gift certificates for 3 riding lessons for Christmas about 25 years ago. I took those 3 lessons, started working at the barn in exchange for riding, rode anything they would put me on and finally got my first horse in my 30s. Next thing I knew I was a working student for an eventer and the journey led me to going south for 9 winters to train and compete. Now I have my own farm with 2 retired horses and one lease, but am stuck here with no trainers around. I'm bored and lonely and love watching inspirational videos of people working towards their goals and dreams. Keep it up!

I wondered what your history was! Thanks for sharing.

On that big horse ya don’t look as bad as ya think. I leased a 17.2 angel who was slow but could jump 3 feet and do cross country but not speedy and took work to make him go. I knew the entire time I rode him he was too big for me. So bouncey. I adore him tho. I am much happier on a smaller horse like 15’s. I have a 15’3 dude now who is still a little big but he’s my sweet so it’s fine 🤣. For my weight I think he’s the correct size. I am so sorry you got hurt. It’s important not to ride horses that have issues imho at our age. Gotta take the time to find sweet ones. All horses of course can have a bad moment. Mine bronced me after too long a lesson and I didn’t trust me gut about how his trot felt weird. He could have thrown me and didn’t. He’s my best boy. Such a sweet story. Keep ridding!!! That white horse looks perfect for you size wise your canter looks better! I had a friend said pretend your having sex 🤣😭😭 which grosses me out but I think she just meant the hip movement! I’m in the exact same position as you I want my canter better and I don’t canter enough. At the moment my horse has not stayed sound enough the past year for me to get there but the vets say it’s possible with injections and better shoe angles. So waiting on the feet to grow and slowly injecting all the things. We did hocks last week so we will see how it goes. Bought my first horse. Went lame a month later. 😅

Watching your vids from Germany :) Your vlogs are sm fun!! 🫶

I’m so happy you actually did this video!! I’m on my way out but I’ll definitely watch it later. Your were so cute at 10 with those red and white pinstripe pants lol 😂

Such a sweet boy! He really seems like the right horse for you right now, he can help you get more balanced so one day you’re able to ride more “difficult” ones

Love the video, thanks for sharing!

Hi, As a biomechanics/classical instructor I think the main thing holding you back is your lower leg position. You cannot use your knee properly if your toe is in front of your knee. The classical riding position for all paces where you sit, is ear, shoulder, hip, heel. The main reason for the foot being too forward is forcing the heels down. If you think of having a flatter foot and maintaining the bend in the knee, this will make your life a lot easier. When you get this position with the lower leg correct, rising from the knee (not the foot) will be possible. You will be able to control the rise (and, more importantly, the fall) much better. She scoots out when you lose your balance on the down phase of rising trot and land heavier on her back. I do agree with some other comments that she does not look 100% sound. This could be because she is not using her back properly. Fixing your lower leg should help this.

I’m meeting my lease tomorrow and then I get to go on a trail ride on a different horse with my trainer for her birthday and then I get a ride in the lease horse so I’m excited 😊 😊😊

I don't know how to ride but you make it look like fun! I appreciate watching your process and the joy you feel in it! Inspiring 💫

He is the cutest, his canter looks comfortable! Having a horse like Taser that can teach you must feel amazing after London, in the way that you can learn to relax, enjoy you ride and work on yourself. The barn looks amazing, do you also have an interior arena?

What song do you have playing in the beginning during your ride, I absolutely love it:)

Sometimes making these hard decisions is really not easy but very necessary. After 6 long years I’m moving barns to hopefully 🙏🏻 get peace and quiet for me and my horse. Change is not always bad(although scary) can sometimes make a world of difference ❤

Great video! Wondering what you think of stability ball exercises to help improve balance? Also, how you acted in the beginning, is so relatable lol 😅🙈😂

I agree that’s why I love it!

That was beautiful ride. He is such a great and gentle horse. Fantastic job both of you.

I would not yet canter with her, but instead focus on leg yield first on walk and trot. Do it 90 degrees and do it to the inside of the arena because most riders do not do it correctly when they do it towards the outside. You want a nice yield without any pulling on the reins, just make sure to have taught her whip/stick yield from ground before you do it mounted so you can correct both the inner hind leg as well as the outer front leg as necessary. I say this because this will greatly help you controlling her in canter, at the moment you are heavilyy hand dependent. Don't get me wrong, I do see that it is scary to train an OTTB and that makes you feel like you want to grab something, so the more control you shift to your legs, the more freedom you get to loosen your hands.

I notice you do not believe in violence which is great. I do see you mostly use mental pressure though, and to be honest, that method is not effective. It is clear to see she is frightened. Why don't just make it a game, play "come to me" where you train your horse to come from a distance with treats, at first just randomly running around in the arena with her, coming to a halt, then teach her to get rewarded. Food reward is a great tool (just ensure that your pattern is that only improvement and new stuff is rewarded, not the default or average action). And when you can make her come, repeat that from the mounting block. Don't do it too often from the block though, because here you would want soon to move forward to her moving her back towards the block and you (and please do use a dressage whip, they hurt badly! think of a quality ground whip like FLECK and only use the rope end, not the stick). For this to work, you need to teach her to yield to you from the ground. Do it as gently as possible. Once these two things work, call her to the mounting block and combine both tasks. Make sure you practiced both exercises (come to you w/o block and the yield) shortly before and that both are done perfectly. If you are lucky, that gets the thing resolved in no time. Think of how to make the exercises a game that your horse feels very comfortable with. Discover playfulness. This will greatly reward you, and even though this is slow start, it will be very fast once the basics are established. Like, think of it, try to get her in the mode where she is really eager to follow you because she really wants to know how to get the treats. I learned that horses will repeat almost anything they can think of just to get the treat, use that to your advantage. Now to the fear part. I recommend to get that frightened look out of her before you mount, because mounting like this could set you up to fail easily. Thus, make it all fun and games! And then, better 5-10 riding sessions with dismount in between (for the beginning that is) than one long one because that greatly speeds up training progress. Reward each time she did great, this way she will sure learn fast to have fun and it is also good for her back given her condition. Lastly: You are doing great, just some tips, take what you thinks suits or ignore :)

Have you ever tried to teach her one rein stop, maybe even bitless to get her out of the habit? I experienced that traumatized horses often do make the transition to bitless very well, because when they scared the riders most of the time add additional pain to the equation, which escalates the situation very often. Try to just grab the mane when you feel you need to grab something, and try to keep your body and arms relaxed at all times. Bending left and right is key, you can teach that from ground, first standing next to her, then driving her, then when riding her in stand, than in walk etc, once that goes very smooth it can be used as an emergency calm down (works best when combined with treats, cuddling and some relaxing moments, because when you try THIS emergency stop, the horse will feel calmed by you, whereas when you pull the reins like this, you give her pain. Try to take as much pain and pressure out of the equation as possible. (and also, you might work on gentle neck release from ground, seeing your horse I am not sure she really ever learned that? Maybe that was not part of her training?) (for the bitless, a good rule of thumb is, if you can drive her from ground bitless in walk and trot, you can ride her bitless, as well. If driving does not work, don't ride until it does) You see what I mean?

She is sound but probably like most TBs have poor hoof quality and feels anything sharp or stony underfoot. Try not to push your legs forward as you ask for walk and bending your elbows a little more will relax your shoulders and will transmit a softer feel down the rein. Well done.

He looks like such a kind horse! I hope this is going well for you and it seems to me (from the video) like you are already more confident on him than you were before. Have fun!! I’m excited for your journey with him😊

I don't like the fact that they paired you with such a green horse in previous barn. Trainer lady should work with this horse before and prepare him more for you. Then she could instruct you how to get harmony together. So this was difficult but right decision you made.

I believe nothing happens without reasons. These other green horses prepared you to fully appreciate this horse. You both look amazing. Are you going to be able to get some lessons with trainer in this place?

Also - looks like freedom!

I love that you found a *trail master* !!! ❤❤❤

Congrats, a new lease horse that is a better match to your skills is always a joy! I saw you check your posting diagonal after you had been cantering, if you start posting just as they transition to trot from canter you always end up on the right diagonal (a sneaky show tip). I don't know why but you will Enjoy "your" pony!

Yay! What a great match. Happy for you, and you look good on him!

He looks lovely. It already looks like you're more relaxed. Amazing what a bit of confidence and the right partner can do! Hope things continue to go well for you 🤍

Lovely boy! He looks so much sounder with a stronger topline than the last 2, and I'm sure his better ability to balance will help boost your confidence a lot. He has such nice reach with his hind legs too! He's much fancier than the apenndix qhs i used to ride haha.

Yay I’m so happy for you!!!

You’re very funny!! Congratulations on finding a new horse that fits your skill set and what you want to do!!! He’s absolutely beautiful!! You looked really good riding him and I’m so glad you’ll be positing videos again! Also, love your shirt! 😍😍

Hind end looks very restricted and stiff. Not tracking up but looked better as time went on. Would be doing long reining, walking over poles, lateral work inhand etc to strengthen her back and hind end and not riding for a few months. Would help adjust her brain too.

This is such a hard decision to come to and to accept, my thoughts go to you. It is unfortunately one downside of half-leasing, my heart breaks thinking of having to end my half-lease so I can just imagine how you must be feeling. I really hope you find something that fits you well and that will help you build your confidence again!! I’ll be here to follow your journey! Wish you all the best!

Looks like it was an amazing and healing weekend!!

I am a new subscriber, I identify SO much with you! I started riding at 36 (41 now- and menopause brain is REAL 😮) I usually ride an older OTTB, but she has a long back too, this was very very informative! I struggle to get Ellie to engage her hind, especially in the canter! And my lower leg is all over the place, haha... It's a journey, but I wouldn't want to do anything else! Thank you for sharing yours!

I just found your channel and have only watched a couple videos. I’m so sorry. You completely made the right decision though. You truly truly did

Riding is like no other sport. It can be so emotionally fulfilling and at the same time so draining. I totally relate to everything you’re saying. I recently bought my first horse (which is not it’s all cracked up to be tbh..especially with a young horse) but for years prior I had to do the lesson horse/lease thing and you are exactly right that sometimes you end up having to take what you can get. And sometimes it’s in your best interest to walk away from a situation that makes you uncomfortable or just isn’t what you want…which is incredibly difficulty, especially if you’re desperate to be around horses! Fingers crossed another horse is in the future for you. Look at how much you’re learning! Take away every bit of info you can from each experience. If you’re passionate about riding and being around horses you’ll find a way!

I'm sorry you're having a rough time finding something that sticks. I'm an adult lessoner too without my own horse. When you dont have the luxury of money to commit to ownership it can be tough, I dont think I could personally take on a lease for the reasons you're talking about here. It's a lot of time, money and heartache to spend on a horse that isn't yours. Have you considered just dialling it back to lessons? Maybe take a couple of lessons a week and do some volunteering with yard jobs to get the "on the ground" horse time? That's what I do personally, while I figure out my next steps. I hope you find something to settle into soon. Sorry it didn't work out with London, but well done for recognising that it wasn't a good fit and taking that difficult step. It's hard to have to do, but you will be better off in the long run. Onwards and upwards 🙂

Sorry you had to end a lease again so quickly. I hope you find a wonderful new horse. Maybe once you get your confidence back cantering and London gains strength/experience, you can lease her again or just take lessons on her so it's not a permanent goodbye.