11 of the WORST things about variegated houseplants | Houseplant Rant

[@prod.am3thystt]

“you can take your monstera frosted doorknob and shove it up your philodendron chocolate delight.” literally the best sentence I have ever heard in my entire life

[@normandgoupil382]

Dear Kaylee, that was the best 28 minutes of comedy I've seen in years!!! Sweetheart you missed your calling!! You should absolutely be be doing comedy sketches!! I can't remember the last time might laugh so hard!!! Please, please, please do more rants!! The plant nut from Hawaii sincerely, Normand Sometimes it is what is beautiful that carries us.....

[@Dszabo95]

Kaylee is on the loose and you can’t tell her NOTHING! She coming after all the scammers!

[@Alizardlovesyou]

Long may she reign 🙌

[@alexclark64]

Oh kaylee I love when you rant 🥰 it brings out the absolute best in you and we need to see more videos like this!!!

[@KayleeEllenOfficial]

Thank you! 😁

[@carolinebaines8735]

I almost paid $350 for a fresh cut pink Micans & Aurea Micans. I backed out as it started to feel sketchy. This rant makes me feel so much better about that decision.

[@ukasz3982]

That was a VINTAGE Kaylee Ellen video and I'm living for it. We need these more often!

[@downingburke233]

“I sell it but don’t buy it.” This is why we’re here. Honesty. Comical honesty. 😂

[@SarahFluffyErica]

Oh. My. God. You just made my night 😆💚 You're absolutely hilarious and I was cracking up the whole video 😂

[@KayleeEllenOfficial]

Haha thank you so much!

[@khonlynxx]

"You can take your monstera frosted doorknob and shove it up your philodendron chocolate delight." LMAO. That's pure gold!

[@joystar1638]

I'm 42 and a chef, I totally thought the numbers on a toaster are for toastiness and not minutes 😅 xxx

[@acatinthegarden]

Would love to see some more in depth videos on some of these points! I also would consider Philodendron Brasil to be variegated. It’s a variegated version of Philodendron Hederaceum Green. The commonality of a plant shouldn’t affect whether or not we call it variegated.

[@AammaK]

It most definitely is, quite self evidently. It also reverts to regular green hederaceum. I wouldn't sell fully reverted green hederaceum cuttings as "reverted brasil", it's just regular hederaceum at that point. That instagram comment was fully unfathomable to me. It's not a name for a special plant, it's a thing those plants do, and if someone let's themselves be fooled by believing there's something even more unique about the plant when variegation is mentioned but the plant in question is already variegated, it's on them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with calling it variegation when it 100% is. Variegation is just pigmen error.

[@TheBubblesandbuttons]

This has been one of my favourite videos you've done in a long time. 😂 love it. On the side of calling something like a philodendron brazil verigated. It is veriegated, but the name covers the fact its verigated...like you dont say verigated pink princess, you just say pink princess or a tai consolation. Once a verigation is commen enough (with maybe some tc help) and it named its still has verigation, its just stable and covered bu the name. Only thing i can think of would be like asking for a sugar free coke zero, you fell me 😄

[@frederickjohnson3777]

Tell the TRUTH and SHAME those scammers. Preach it Lady.💯💯💯!!

[@EMuro-wu7uy]

I listened to this again. I've been looking for a Florida Beauty, and all the ones I've found are miss-ID of Florida green with no variegation. I adore these rants, because I see things labeled as weird names, I've put in the correct information and they don't like me pointing out inaccuracies. I point it out, not to be mean, so people new to things can double check their facts. So thank you for your great work and help. Your honesty and integrity is absolutely amazing.

[@catekkelboom-white5210]

Really enjoyed this rant! I’d love to see you take down some of the facebook communities. They seem to be some of the worst. Like, someone will post a photo of a new plant they are proud of, and then people will tear them down, commenting on how much they paid, how it was over priced, that it’s a crap specimen. Whatever. So many are such toxic spaces where people just seem to be dicks.

[@sherryporsch9349]

So glad you did this video. Ran across a lady the other day, she was so happy she finally had a Albo but she bought a half moon an all she was getting was white leaves. Felt really bad for her. She was clueless. So thank you 💚

[@sassyjaxxy]

Omg LOVED this! Ranting Kaylee is rhe best Kaylee! I trust your knowledge because you not afraid to say the truth even if it’s not in you favor!

[@HipyoTech]

Literally any yellow variegated plants look like death to me, I genuinely cant understand why people pay more for them.

[@Caeilia]

YES! Just looks like you forgot to feed your plants for about 10 years or the leaf is dying off

[@elmerhernandez5810]

“I SELL IT, BUT DONT BUY IT!” Was too real! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Plant-Parenthood_9001]

I've never felt more validated. I thought my var. Florida Beauty problems were just a fluke. Love your energy in this one and "chaos rules" is a good reminder anytime I look at my plants. Gotta love unpredictable nature. Keeps me on my toes!

[@ekamarie6632]

I’d love a full info and care guide on the blue oil fern. I recently got one and the info out there is slim! Obviously I can find bits and bops here but I’d like to know someone who has had actually had what their experiences are, problems they ran into how they fixed it etc

[@sarahanderson344]

I don't comment very often but this video was EVERYTHING! I watch your videos and this is the best thing I've seen in awhile. Thank you so much!

[@LeafyLovey]

Kaylee I wanted to talk to you about each one until I realized you hit ut spot on. Oh my goodness You were on fire and you are an absolute smile that is so big your face hurts. Thank you! ❤

[@lucasbrady4639]

I like how enthusiastic she is in this video. It shows just how passionate she is about innocent people getting scammed by scumbags that sell crappy cuttings that are fated to die.

[@demidron.]

7:52 "Don't. Just- Just take it from me: Don't buy it. Don't buy it. I sell it, but don't buy it." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I love how you're so honest and don't try to hype things up just because you sell them. And I love when you take aim at unscrupulous sellers! This is a super enjoyable video. I have a very unpopular opinion, so here's my own rant: To me, #11 applies to pretty much every variegated plant. With very few exceptions, I think they're hideous and I can't wait for the craze to end. I don't understand why people are so enamoured with, objectively, sick-looking plants. Yes, a healthy variegated plant is distinguishable from a sick plant if you know your stuff, but many people don't and the craze is not just among the people who can spot what's going on. On Facebook, I constantly see posts like "Oh my god, my _____ _____ has put out a variegated leaf!" and there are twenty comments gushing about how beautiful it is and how lucky the person is and how they could probably make a lot of money off it if they can propagate it before someone points out that it's obviously viral or the plant is just nutrient deficient. This glorification of defective plants has created the environment that has allowed unethical sellers to scam people with infected plants, chemically induced temporary variegation etc., and people are right to be angry when they get scammed. Of course, no one wants an infected plant that is going to die because they probably want to have the plant for a while, so they want a plant that is not actually infected or stressed but merely (if this is a word) chlorophyllically disadvantaged in a way that mimicks infection or stress, and I just don't understand it. I want my plants to remind me of a jungle and transport me away to a place away from people and their buIIshit and variegated plants don't remind me of a jungle, or at least not the healthy plants in a jungle. They never look "lush". At best, in the rare case that they are in good condition without brown bits everywhere, they look "artsy". They remind me of a plant shop, a living room or an instagram page - places I don't really want to feel transported away to. I love it when I see plants that have reverted to green. Like "Good on you! You sorted out your problems!" Reversion is success, as far as I'm concerned. It's an inspirational story about a plant overcoming obstacles and becoming healtheir and more beautiful even at the risk of disappointing some humans. And Philodendron 'Brasil' is absolutely variegated. It's a variegated form of Philodendron hederaceum var. oxycardium. It's common and it's a much more stable variegation than a lot of other variegated plants, but it is still undeniably a variegated plant.

[@davidc4162]

Kaylee can you elaborate on ‘blocky’ variegation looking suspect? My understanding is that variegation often does have clearly defined margins (white knight) and can appear in ‘blocks’ while disease/damage/pests will have blurry margins.

[@botanicassie]

Just a block that doesn’t go to the edges of the leaf or anything. A random block in the middle of the leaf or stem. That’s suspect.

[@Budgetinpurple]

I lost it at Monstera Frosted Doorknob, I needed to laugh like that. This is pure gold

[@the_foliage_wall]

This was the BEST stress dumb I have seen in a while. Thank you for it. Lots of clapping and amens from me. Wish I would seen this sooner. 😊

[@CatSprat3]

To me, this video is just absolute peak Kaylee Ellen. I adore your sassy energy ❤

[@mayragalicia7527]

Omg I remember watching your video about the chemically variegated plants. I saw a big “local” seller sell a pink micans plant for over 500 dollars I was like oh noooo

[@karenbreeze1543]

I have 3 pink Princesses and the only one I've never had to worry about the leaves buckling is the one that I keep in front of the window in the bathroom.

[@stuartmachir]

That time when Kaylee read variegation perps like a sunday paper. "Monstera frosted doorknob" nearly killed me.

[@tezalizard]

This was nothing short of f#%king brilliant. As an ‘Albo’ Daddy, it’s been a crazy roller coaster ride. Wish I had this video as a guide when I first started collecting all the ‘Albo’s.’

[@josephrapp]

You are an expert Ranter!!!! Love how you get into it and cannot stop hardly. Too funny!!

[@rhondafisher72]

This has to be the absolute best video on variegation I have ever seen. lol Just love your style! ! No one has said it better. Thank you

[@claire.o1145]

This video had me in stitches, Kaylee is hilarious 😂 love this energy 🎉

[@sarahneedom9661]

😂 You crack me up Kaylee! I just love you! Your humor is unlike any other! Keep it up girl! Love it! Frosted doorknob! Lol what?! 🤣 Thanks for the laugh, thank you so so much! 😂❤ This is probably my favorite video yet on here.

[@NicolesGardenNS]

Go get ‘em Kaylee! Loving this angry rant, it’s incredibly entertaining 😜 Love from Canada! Keep the content coming!

[@Yoliplanting]

I love how passionate you are and fearless. Those plants do look sick😂😂

[@Plantasea]

I Did not expect to be laughing my ass off while clicking onto this random video… 😂 an informative comedy… you are so entertaining to listen to 🤓😂take my like and subscription!

[@RastaImpala]

Kaylee just going off unhinged for 28 minutes straight was a treat. As someone who started their plant journey with a variegated plant I relate to this so much 😂 But I'm obsessed with them so this is life now 😅🤷‍♂️

[@stacylee8429]

You’re looking gorgeous Kaylee! Seems like you’re feeling better which is awesome to see. 👏 👏 👏

[@meghannichols529]

"Fly monkeys fly!"😂😂😂 I'm actually laughing out loud

[@valerieskillman2934]

Loving the rant energy. My favorite video of yours thus far.

[@ecthelion1517]

Chilling with my Syngonium albo and admiring its ease of care and beautiful variegation :D

[@cecile436]

There are some variegations that I love, I find them absolutely beautiful, even if it makes them diva plants. There are others I really don't like (yellow variegations, I always have the feeling a plant is sick; pink variegations, not my colour;...) But I can't afford to buy a well established plant and all. I saved money for my birthday and went to a plant fair, I got a head cutting with 3 leaves of a montera variegata (it was at the end of April, the plant rooted superbly and gave me a beautiful new leaf) and I bought a single tiny leaf of alocasia frydek variegata, because I can't afford a bigger one. It's still pretty small, but it gave me already 5 new leaves and it keeps going. It get bigger each time and it's so pretty. Recently I stumbled across a calathea white fusion, I know it's a diva, but I gave it a try, because I think they are so beautiful. It was the first time I was seeing one in a shop, it wasn't very expensive (like 12€) so I went for it. I'm sure it'll struggle along the way, but I'll do my best to keep it happy. I can understand the hate, but I like some variegations.

[@Dfrancisca95]

"Say it with me, jump up & down with me guys" 😂💚 Love it!

[@mutasionisis]

I’d definitely say philodendron brazil is variegated, but it’s just not the kind of variegation we usually associate with when we talk about it. Brazil is a variegated cultivar of philodendron hederaceum, along with other cultivars of it like Rio, Cream Splash, etc. They can also definitely revert back to all green, which is what happens to all non systemic variegation. I have a Brazil myself and some vines have definitely reverted on me.

[@charlotteemma7931]

I agree. Mine must have got too much light, cause I have far more lime green leaves than I'd like to have!!

[@heatherjensen3327]

The thing that kills me is people killing themselves searching for carnivals or gabbys but to me all the cultivars of them legit all look the same. None more spectacular than another type but some cost x4 as much.

[@jackiewhitney5031]

Truth is love and I love Kaylee's gut-wrenching videos. Thank you Kaylee for being you!

[@suezy1969]

When you said … looks like a bird 💩 on the leaf. The first thing that came to mind is variegated Alocasia Frydek !! I have not seen too many I actually like! Anyone else?

[@lschoenrank]

I would say that Philodendron "Brasil" is variegated. I rather like it because it's vigorous and simple to grow, and each leaf is a bit different from the last. Yet it's green and green and so won't have any photosynthesis problems. Great rant!

[@variegated_stingray]

The all variegated parts of a Halfmoon Monstera absolutely doesn't have to brown/die off at all. If it's an aurea? Hell yes, that thing will brown 100%. An albo? Nope, not if you know how to properly care for them.

[@LizzyDel]

I don’t know how.. but you fell out of my suggestions.. now I have like seven videos to watch. Haha I’m really excited to have a marathon this weekend. 😅

[@miasacreative1561]

This is just gold Kaylee! Love a Kaylee rant ❤😂❤😂❤😂

[@sentimentada4391]

I only just found your account and am loving your rants! Hilarious and so honest, keep them coming! 😂❤

[@mariaguezo7136]

Your energy this whole video had me laughing my ass off 😂 In all seriousness though, you’ve taught me everything I know about plant scammers and I really appreciate videos like this ❤ Thanks Kaylee!

[@TessaTron92]

Love the energy on this! I would absolutely watch more rant videos

[@emily2691]

The unhinged chaotic energy in this video is incredible. I love it so much 😂

[@the_greenhouse_co]

As an up and coming seller I love these videos. I want to know the ins and the outs to all plants so I can be honest and transparent with my buyers.

[@theresadavidson4867]

This just became my favorite video! You also made me feel so silly for paying more money for my variegated string of hearts. I didn’t even think about paying more (in my area) just because it was it’s color was from sun stress! You just made this plant newbies day!

[@MarisaAndChew]

I feel like this was a dramatic reading for plant people. Lol love it! Buyer protections need to extend to things like receiving the wrong item aka a Thai instead of a Mint. If it's not what it says buyers should not only get a full refund but the seller should have to pay for any shipping costs to get their plant back... A seller should know, whether on Etsy or on their own website or LLC etc. Fraud is fraud and the online shopping laws need to start recognizing it!

[@mickiteoxon]

Exactly

[@jv_likes_plants]

Philodendron hederaceum 'Brazil' to me is a 'cheap box store variegated' class. It can revert and fluctuate, all that variegated jam, it is also strictly related to the Rio, which is generally considered variegated.

[@meganthurium]

The Pink Princess Diamond Buttchug 😭😂

[@IlianaTorres-r8v]

😂😂😂😂 This was very honest and straight forward you can tell you were building this rant up for awhile

[@kekepaniapayne5614]

Love love love your videos! Educational & hilarious…and the best part is my husband actually likes you too! Usually he rolls his eyes when he walks in the room at any female KZbinr I watch & thinks their voices are all annoying but he loves yours & he loves that you curse in your videos too😆. Wish you were in the US I would love to buy plants from you!

[@dillonkentworth6718]

“What are you trying to do, cast a new Harry Potter spell?” I screamed 😆

[@i_cant_think8947]

I love the comments on Burning ‘Dorito’ and ‘Bar of soap in the microwave’ they made me lose it completely! And definitely agree with them, I was trying to find a Variegated cactus then it for some reason just rotted now I go for blue

[@ShinyCardBoards]

You are so knowledgeable and absolutely hilarious! Love your videos!

[@mrs.krabbe2493]

Loving the go. Don't get me wrong I've enjoyed the relaxed or calmer videos but this video was "go go bull wings activate." I woke up talking this morning and the vibe flowed great for me. Thank you.

[@PozdrawiamMame]

I loooove this video :D Some var plants look like they are on the verge of dying due to spidermite attack. I;ve never understood that "mint" phenomenon except for the real monstera mint var 💚

[@melissawest4285]

I completely and totally agree with you on the Adansonii mint! So ugly! Looks like diseased wilted spinach that a bug has been munching on!

[@deltatango6793]

Omg I could listen to you complain about seller’s plant listings all day 😂😅👏🏼 keep up the great work! 🌱

[@verlenelewis9866]

I almost didn’t watch this, but so glad I did. This is absolutely entertaining and hilarious!!! 😂

[@Womynxx]

Great video! I never understood the sun stress thing. I see people selling Hoyas and they put “sun stressed” in the title like that’s a good thing. 🤦🏾‍♀️ Like you said, why would you want a stressed plant?

[@kaitlenredner4897]

Philodendron Birkin's. Notorious for Cinderella syndrome lmao

[@jackreinstein1717]

My Florida beauty had very mixed variegation and I waited for it to grow 10ish big leaves b4 I propagated it. Now I have 8 babies and it’s about 50/50 with 4 mixed variegation babies and 4 babies with almost all white or green. So yeah most propagations don’t have great results

[@bailemos]

Best video of yours I've seen so far! Brilliant.

[@IvyMich3ll3]

Paraiso Verde variegation is influenced by temperature 💀 I traded mine cause I was hardly getting anything out of it.

[@passionateplantperson]

Bravo Kaylee!!! Take a bow!!! Amazing video! Thank you for speaking the truth!

[@silasd7348]

Totally agree. Make sure you do your research on plants before you buy them. I purchased a "mint" variety of a plant and is now giving me fully white leaves 🥰. Great. Never again

[@reyfigueroa4091]

I’m dead, “I sell it but don’t buy it” so real for this 💀

[@EmmaMorgan09]

Fab video. One of your best I think. So much energy and superbly edited. Can I give a shout out to tradescantia quadricolour which is effectively a variegated standard purple tradescantia… props as easily as any trad and I don’t understand why it’s so expensive!

[@kaitlynhuynh9260]

I agree with the Peru. She got me at the, “Don’t buy it, don’t buy it, I sell it, but don’t buy it!!” 😂😂

[@bonkersforever]

I disagree on the variegation debate with brasils and tinekes. It feels lightly gatekeepery to say they’re not variegated. They are! Just not in the way that’s currently popular, almost because they’re too “perfect”. I see the same thing happening with lab-created diamonds. People pooh-pooh them and say they’re not real diamonds, because they’re too perfect and artificial when they have the same physical, chemical, and optical characteristics as a diamond found in the ground. Tinekes/brasils ARE variegated; their variegation is just more perfect - in the same way a lab-created diamond is more perfect than a ground diamond. I think acknowledging that though would almost devalue more wildly variegated plants, so people argue they’re not REALLY variegated. Plants are plants. I love both kinds!

[@moominsean]

I made the mistake of buying a half moon monstera aurea and I finally just cut it back to the base after a year of full green, half moon (moon side dies off), full green, half moon (moon side dies off), etc. The original leaf is still alive and has the normal marbled variegation so I'm hoping it grows out that way this time around.

[@r.mertens]

Kaylee Ellen is on fire. You go girl, Thank you.

[@sayadhasul]

literally I am jumping with you Kaylee

[@plantoisme465]

Really enjoyed this vid Kayl. Cannot be more agree with you on the half moon var, they're nightmare 😂 I'll certainly rewatch thia later on ❤

[@Highlander-qf8ho]

How about the Var Burly Marx ? No matter how many times I prop the variegated nodes I get nothing but green ! I have way to many of them now that are all green! 😂

[@mindfulmadeline]

one of your best videos lately, loved it!!!

[@torquess454]

You’re my absolute fav! Sooo clever and entertaining! I could watch/listen ALL DAY! You’d be a really successful radio host! Yup I accidentally ripped off the top growth of my pink princess doing that exactly , it was caterpilling and trying to help it, I broke it right off.. Isn’t the Brazil a variegated version of the heart leaf? I don’t know if it’s own plant honestly or a hybrid there’s different info online. I honestly prefer the natural forms of plants and animals, I’m not interested in a verigated hybrid that someone’s made. There’s a reason it didn’t do that in the wild. I like my plants to last.

[@HolidayGlow]

Oh shite... I was today years old on the toast thing too! (Also thank you for the rants that are some of my top pet peeves as well.)

[@mollusc3125]

Oh man, the Florida beauty thing. Third time was the charm for me, at least so far, but I’m currently scared to breathe too close to it because I’m getting a high variegation leaf then a low variegation leaf, then high, then low, etc. Not 100% either way yet, but I need to sacrifice a goat to the plant gods or something because I won’t cope if it goes full flip flop.

[@katbattt]

OMG I loved this video. I was cracking up so much!! Yes please to all the rants because ranty Kaylee is the best!! Also is that a little kitty scratch on your lip? 😼

[@LoveeeJonesss]

I spent 120 on a variegated philodendron I wouldn’t have bought because I already had one, albeit smaller, because of what I found out after watching a previous video of yours was just sun/heat stress. I wish I’d seen your video and this video BEFORE I bought it. It’s gorgeous and well established but the reason I bought it isn’t what I thought 😞

[@x3rascalflatts]

I love all your videos, but really loved the extra sass in this one!

[@TrevorRenfro]

“I sell it but don’t buy it!” When talking about the Peru is why I trust you 😂

[@Purrs_and_plants]

How much caffeine have you had Kaylee, this is the best content I’ve seen all week :D

[@MissGigi405]

This is hilarious 😂😂😂. Thank you for the PSA!

[@brandykratz561]

Oops I brought a Monsterra Peru. Lol. I only paid $20. I just brought. Pink Princess, Alocasia Black Velvet, Philodendron Silver Sword, and a Sansevieria Whale Fin. Each for under $20. All in 6 inch pots.