12 Steps to Potty Train Your Autistic Child

[@7Aheadfamily]

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[@dollycook9121]

My son with ASD is 10 now and we started potty training when he was almost 3. We used the “Oh Crap! Potty Training book but stretched out the 3 days to 5. We picked out underwear and then had him go without a diaper or anything the first couple days, just pants the third and then underwear for a couple days. I learned his cues and told him when it was time to go. I didn’t ever ask him if he needed to go because he wouldn’t realize it. He also loved the potty books we got for him. I think the only reward we have him was watching a video. For #2, it was harder to teach him and I am not sure how he finally got it. He also regressed during Covid and we had to get him more on a schedule at that time.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks for sharing. This is great!

[@higherground337]

Former preschool teacher here. All the advice in this video is spot on. 😊

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you!

[@delisharhybon]

This is so amazing to hear another parent understanding the daily struggles of potty training with a autistic child. Definitely glad you pointed out the rewards and incentives. Most importantly the way you said they don't like to stop what they're doing when it's time to go. Great job breaking this down love your videos

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much! ❤️

[@shontelbraun]

@@7Aheadfamily the stuff had stuggles with me pottying training well getting mm and a figet very fun so i went every time they give a toy

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️❤️❤️

[@mscaptainsavenoho8454]

I don't have any children but love how close your family is. You have an amazing family!! God bless you all!

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding early potty training experiences and how they can relate to picture taking: When I was younger before I was able to use the potty chair (and later the toilet) I needed to go through a roughly one month period of learning the mechanics of how to do what needed to be done in a sitting position for each activity. I learned one portion of the process at age three-and-a-half and the second part of the process at age four. When I was learning the mechanics of it I would practice on outdoor outings by pushing my feet against a rock, a tree stump, or a fence post, or some other portion of a wooden fence (while I was sitting on the fence). In this fashion I learned to associate sitting in those positions with relaxation and my parents were able to take more natural photographs of me when I was in those positions. This worked well for picture taking both during and after the time that I was training. Back when I was growing up (back in the 1970s and 1980s) it was customary to break up the training process into two parts. First came the “number one” training portion. Later on (typically three to six months later) the “number two” portion of the training would occur. In my case each part of the process would begin first with learning the mechanics (over the course of about a month) and then after that the focus would be on fine-tuning the where to do this part of the process.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks for sharing your experience! It's interesting how early potty training can influence our comfort levels in various situations.

[@7Aheadfamily]

😀Hey Friends! We would love ❤ for you to join us in our ASD club, where we get on a video chat every week, answer questions, and talk all things Autism. Learn More Here ➡ www.7-ahead.com/asdclub

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Earlier this morning I remembered back to the Disney “Suite Life on Deck” episode titled “Love and War”. In part of that episode Bailey and London were volunteering in the ship’s play room. Many kids in the playroom in that scene can be estimated to be around three or four years old. Some may be as old as five. In any case London gives the kids a snack and Bailey has them play immediately afterward. I’m not going to specify exactly what happened next but suffice it to say it is probably the most memorable example of the gastrocolic reflex on modern television. The scene underscores the importance of scheduling bathroom breaks shortly after meals and snack times. This is important even if the child has been more or less fully trained for at least a year or two (as was likely the case in that scene). Also, it would be interesting to think about whether London and Bailey would remember back to those events later if the topic of the gastrocolic reflex is covered in their high school biology class sometime after that. The series did not go into this but it would have been interesting for the series to explore that topic. For example, they could have done an episode where London was having difficulty studying for a biology test and Bailey could bring up this example so that London can remember the function of this reflex for the test. I am mentioning all of this because while every individual is different it is also not uncommon for people on the spectrum at any age to have stronger reflexes (including a stronger gastrocolic reflex). As someone who was level two in childhood (I’m currently level one) I can confirm even now in my late 40s that I have a very strong gastrocolic reflex and I still need to make sure that when I have a meal or a snack that I have a rest room nearby. For the moment this pretty much sums up my observations on this topic.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It’s interesting how a simple scene can highlight such an important topic. Kids’ routines definitely play a big role in their comfort and well-being.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

On literal thinking and potty accidents: Earlier this morning I was reading a blog where someone mentioned a memory from some years back about a trip to Disney World. Apparently it was the end of a very long day and a mother and her son were very tired. In any case the man got off at the bus stop for his hotel and the boy stopped on the sidewalk about two steps after getting off the bus. At that point he immediately emptied his bladder. Apparently he was still in the middle of potty training and this was one of his first trips out without a diaper. Perhaps he was confused and thought he had a diaper on. In any case the mother apologized and told the other people who got off the bus at that stop that she was very sorry this is her fault, not his. She then explained that she told him that he could go as soon as he got off the bus. The blog did not specify how old the boy was. He could have been two (or maybe early threes) and neurotypical. Alternatively he could have been in his mid-to-late threes or four or older and on the spectrum. In any case realizing the possibility of such a scenario is relevant to any parent who is potty training their kid (or perhaps even someone whose kid has been trained for a while (perhaps even for a year or more) but tends to follow instructions very literally). To put things in perspective I’m on the spectrum (currently level one, but I was level two during childhood) and I made that type of mistake fairly frequently until I was five-and-half (if not six). My mistakes would usually happen after my mother told me (often on a long car ride to wait a specific length of time (such as one minute, two minutes, or five minutes) if there was a clock or watch within viewing distance. I would currently estimate that perhaps around half of my car seat wettings were caused by this type of mistake. One addendum: I just asked Microsoft Copilot about a reasonable average for when one might expect to see mistakes like this. In essence it responded by saying that if someone is neurotypical this type of mistake is common around age three. At level one it would still be common to see this mistake at age five. At level two mistakes like this are still common as late as age seven. These numbers are probably accurate when a child is transitioning from diapers to underwear and still getting used to the transition. I also just asked Microsoft Copilot about whether it would be common for someone with level one autism who has been potty trained for around a year to make this mistake and it confirmed that yes this is quite common.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your personal experience! It really highlights how literal thinking can impact potty training and the challenges that come with it. Every child is unique, and it’s great to have these discussions.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding stress, conceptual confusion and mistakes: I’m on the spectrum (currently level one but I was level two when I was younger). This morning while I was washing my hair I remembered back to an early memory of a shower when I was four-and-three quarters years old. This was on a family vacation to the beach. We were staying at a cottage and after spending the day at the beach my mother taught me about the outdoor shower. This was the day that I learned the phrase “shower head”. I also learned about laundromats and how laundry is done. In any event when I was in the shower there were two possible potty training mistakes that I could make and I made both of them. This happened because I mistakenly conceptualized the shower drain as a “shower potty”. After this happened my mother explained that I made a mistake and I think that was my last time doing that. This morning I asked Microsoft copilot if my mistake would be common given my age at the time and the circumstances. It indicated that yes, it would be quite common. After that I asked whether this could also happen if I was level one and if I had been at least fairly well trained for about a year. It answered that while it would be much less likely at level one with that amount of training it would definitely still be quite possible especially given the stress and sensory overload associated with the new and unfamiliar environment.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤❤❤

[@caramello0329]

Great video, i was going to mentioned what also helped us to have him go in public places we bought a fold up seat on amazon. so it folds up small for a purse or diaper bag and we always take it or to grandmas. Plus we used a potty watch at first he loved wearing it and you can set the timer and then it sings a potty song and lights up.

[@7Aheadfamily]

That's a great idea!

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I don’t remember if I mentioned this idea before or not but it relates to positive reinforcement and I figured I would mention it just in case. Back when I was growing up there were two types of baths in my house. The first one was a traditional bath where there was just soap, water, and (if needed) shampoo and conditioner. The only goal of this type of bath is getting cleaned up. This type of bath would be used if I rolled around in the mud or intentionally got dirty in any other way. The second was was a playtime bath where there would typically be some cleaning (especially if my hair needed to be washed, or if I had a genuine accident in a situation where it could not be avoided). The other time I would get a playtime bath was if it was my scheduled bath time and I was still clean. During these baths I would have a rubber duck, a toy boat, or some other toy that I enjoyed playing with in the tub. Sometimes I would have a bubble bath during these times but with my sensitive skin this was relatively uncommon. My mother allowed me to have bath toys if I did well with staying clean and dry during the day until around age eleven or twelve because I still needed that extra reinforcement sometimes in order to remain trained. She would keep the bath toys in a drawer or in a closet that only she could open and she would give me the bath toys if I did well with my training on that day. Perfection was not required at any age but I did need to try my best. By about age eleven or twelve daytime accidents were pretty rare. For context I was level two back then (I’m currently level one). A friend of mine has some grandkids who are on the spectrum and she’s using this same approach with them. So far it seems to be helping them. Time will tell how well it works in the long run.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤❤❤

[@donnabrown4349]

My Autistic son had many sensory issues. He was not ready until 4 1/2 years and trained day and night with a reward system. He was high functioning even though he had melt downs and ADHD. We rewarded him with a prize. Started out with about a $8.00 prize and then working its way down to smaller prizes then rewards of doing something he liked. He was trained in 2 weeks. I also left him in his underwear. It is better not to use a pull up because it is absorbent and feels to much like a diaper. Soggy or poop 💩 filled underwear are uncomfortable and making them want to hurry to the potty so that doesn’t happen. He graduated from High School in the year 2000 and works as a cashier with no assistance at Walgreens. He had two much older brothers who are neurotypical. My sons are 41, 37 and 21 and all have summer birthdays. My youngest son was born when I was 45 years old. I also have 4 Grandchildren. Two Grandsons and two Granddaughters. Ages 6,5,3 and 1.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I just remembered a recent phone conversation I had with my mother where I mentioned how the potty chair sounded to me when I used it. I told her that the sound (when I think back on it) reminds me of the sound of a white noise machine. It just occurred to me that whether a parent is getting a child used to a traditional potty chair or a travel potty for situations where a public restroom may not be readily available that playing a similar sound on a white noise machine or white noise app might help some kids with making this transition. In my case I probably remember this because I am on the spectrum (currently level one, but I was level two when I was younger). In my case this has multiple effects. First, it slowed down my potty training to the point where I was already forming long-tern memories by the time I started training. Second, in addition to having perfect pitch I tend to remember most of what I hear almost exactly after one to three listenings. Third, I don’t have the level of childhood amnesia that a neurotypical person would have. That being said, my memories before eighteen months to two years are fairly vague.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.❤

[@tamaraanderson7260]

Great job Simon and parents 🎉

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. 💜❤️💜

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding eating, drinking, and the gastrocolic reflex: Yesterday I remembered back to some things that I used to do when I was younger (for example on long car rides) up to around age six. I also remember reading about similar things that I read about on blogs and saw in some TV commercials over the years. In any event this led me to ask Microsoft Copilot yesterday morning if it is statistically within the norm for someone who is level one or level two to feel the urge to defecate and occasionally go with it immediately even after one or more years of being well toilet trained during the day and it responded by saying that yes it is actually quite common and completely understandable. Specifically if a child is level one or level two (for example) and he or she is sitting in a car seat and has something to eat or drink and it takes longer than expected to reach a rest stop (for example due to a traffic jam, or if a parent underestimates how long it will take to reach the next rest stop) this can trigger an urge to defecate that is very difficult or sometimes even impossible to resist. This happens because of the gastrocolic reflex. This reflex is one that everyone has throughout life but it is the strongest for most people in the first four to six years of life. Reflexes including this one are often stronger when someone is on the spectrum. For example, I was level two when I was younger (I’m currently level one) and this is what I experienced in the first six years. According to Microsoft Copilot (for example) in situations like this (just like in elimination communication) it is best to tell the child that you see and understand that he or she has decided to use the car seat this time, that you are not angry about it, and to let you know when he or she is finished so you help him or her to clean up as soon as possible. During the cleanup (which the child can assist with, if developmentally ready to do so) you can remind the child that he or she might be more comfortable next time if he or she waits for the toilet (if he or she is able to do so that time). Either way in a situation like that the child is not actually misbehaving and should not be punished for it (even if it looks completely deliberate). Also, if this happens it can also trigger a car seat wetting don’t worry that’s normal and it doesn’t mean that the child no longer toilet trained. This can happen while drinking juice from a sippy cup, during or after eating a lunch in the car seat for example, or even after eating a bag of candy such as M&Ms (for instance).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your experiences. That's interesting.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just talking to my parents on the phone earlier this evening and I was talking about various ways that technology can go wrong. In the course of that conversation the subjects of toilet training, toilets, and various technologies came up. While I was talking to my parents it occurred to me that there are at least two ways that a technology issue could cause a potty accident for any child who is new to technology and/or takes things literally. First, if the phone or tablet has a potty timer app and the timer goes off at the wrong time he or she may take the instruction literally and decide to go right at that moment. Second, if the child is able to speak or type he or she might ask a chat bot or virtual assistant if it is a good time to “go”. If the virtual assistant or chat bot says yes this could cause a potty accident. To minimize the chances of this it is always a good idea to keep the phone or tablet operating systems and all apps as up to date as possible. Virtual assistants and chatbots will make some mistakes even if you do this but this probably won’t happen as often as it would otherwise.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good that Marie was pointing to various objects in the bathroom and asking Simon “Is this the potty?” and waiting for an answer. For children who are able to understand some questions and who are beginning to communicate verbally like Simon is this is a very important step for reinforcing relevant memories of what a toilet is (and what it isn’t) and clearing up any confusion/misconceptions that the child might have about this. Also if a parent has decided to use training pants of any kind and the child is at least as verbal as Simon is in this video it is important to ask him or her questions to make sure that he or she understands the difference between underpants, training pants, diapers, and what each one is for. I know someone who has a grandson who is in at least his second year of kindergarten who has level two autism and only recently became as verbal as Simon is now. He is good at math and reading for someone his age (He actually does math and reading on up to a second grade level (at least on good days)) but he’s still in kindergarten in the morning because of some struggles with both toilet training and socializing. In the afternoon he does math and reading in more advanced classes in a first or second grade classroom) but he still gets certain concepts like (“potty chair” and “car seat”) and (“underwear” and “training pants”) mixed up fairly often. He sometimes uses the toilet and can even usually change himself after a wetting accident (he still wears either pull-ups or easy ups pretty much all the time). If reminded he will often use the toilet but he’s not really completely independent yet. It is at least possible that if he were asked questions similar to the ones that Marie asked Simon like “Is this a potty?” on a regular basis that some of his current misunderstandings might have been cleared up already, but then again who knows? On a related note by about age five to five-and-a-half after I was training for a while (for me a while was a year or so) (back in the early 1980s) if I started “going” in the wrong place my mother would say (if I was sitting on her lap at the time and starting to “go”) “Silly Tommy, Mommy’s not a potty!”. If I was wetting my car seat (or having any type of accident) at the same age my mother would say things like “Uh-oh (or oh no) Tommy you’re going potty in your car seat”. Other times she would say things like “Silly Tommy that’s not a potty that’s your car seat!”. Given where I was socially at that age (I was level two/“moderate” on the spectrum by today’s criteria) I wouldn’t experience embarrassment on anything like a regular basis until at least age nine (if not ten) but mild corrections like these after a genuine misunderstanding leading to an “accident” of either type still worked pretty well for me without any time outs. For me time outs (typically one minute for each year of age) followed by a brief explanation of why I was put in time out were typically reserved for any obvious “on purposes” such as wetting or soiling as part of a temper tantrum. I only rarely did this, but it did happen from time to time even at age five or so. No other punishments were ever needed for me to complete my toilet training. For now that pretty much sums up my observations on this.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@Java-D]

These were all great tips. The only thing I did differently was to use a potty chair with all 3 of my children. It was something wide, sturdy, and short so they could easily get on and off by themselves. It also allowed me to use the big toilet while they used their little potty at the same time. Seeing what other people do while in the bathroom is a big help to some kids. We also had a potty chair in the back of the suv which was great when we were out and about or on road trips. Also, having books or electronics in the bathroom was so distracting to my kids that they wouldn’t successfully potty. We had to concentrate on what we were there to do. 😊 So every kid really is different.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. 💜❤️💜

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding the temporary use of training pants and similar products and travel: Yesterday I asked Microsoft Copilot about some hypothetical situations where it would make sense for a parent to temporarily go back to using a product like disposable training pants and one scenario that it mentioned was long road trips (another related one was long flights). In the road trip scenario (for example a road trip from Toronto to Vancouver and back in a car) assuming an age of around three-and-a-half or four it is likely that one training pant will (on average) last between two and four hours. Also each one is likely to be used in one way or even both. Don’t worry that’s completely normal (especially if rest areas are fairly far away or traffic jams occur). A parent can reduce the effects that this has on toilet training by having the child attempt to go during any scheduled rest stops, at restaurants, and during any hotel stays. Whether the bathroom is used when offered in this scenario is something that the child should get to decide on any given bathroom visit. In the event of any successful bathroom visits praise and a reward should be provided. The parent should tell the child about any rewards ahead of time so that he or she understands that there is an incentive to make an effort. I asked Microsoft copilot if there’s a readjustment period after the road trip and it gave me (as I recall) roughly the following answer: After the trip there is a readjustment period after returning from training pants to underwear. Assuming the child is reasonably well trained before the trip there is a readjustment period of about one to two weeks (usually more like two weeks). During this time underwear should be worn exclusively. Diapers or training pants should not be used during this period for any reason during the day. In the first day or two you can expect an accident rate of around 40% to 50%. After about two weeks (with consistent retraining and rewards and praise for any successes) you can expect an accident rate of between 0% and 10%. Some children will retrain in as little as one week but individual results may vary. If a child is neurodiverse in some way a more realistic retraining period is two weeks minimum with a more realistic timeframe of more like three to four weeks. I’m on the spectrum (currently level one but I was level two when I was growing up). My road trips were during the late 1970s and into the 1980s when disposable training pants didn’t exist yet and I sometimes wore Pampers during that time because I wasn’t able to wait very long and I had difficulty with using unfamiliar toilets. In addition in the late 1970s and early 1980s the tapes on Pampers were not yet refastenable. Therefore parents at that time would typically wait for the Pamper to be used and then change it. Today’s conventional disposables (the non-pull-on-kind) typically have either refastenable tapes or some type of hook and loop system . This allows for more opportunities for rest room visits without wasting any products unnecessarily. On average this can be expected to reduce the effects of product usage on toilet training to some degree. For me it would typically take about three to four weeks before my accident rate would drop back to pre-road trip levels so it would seem that Copilot’s figures are actually fairly accurate (on average) in this instance. The bottom line is that if one takes any long Summer road trips it is a good idea to do it early in the Summer to allow sufficient time for any necessary retraining after the road trip ends so that the retraining will be completed before preschool or school resumes.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.❤

[@renitawesterlund6322]

Thankyou so much for these awesome tips so helpful and a life saver. We tried one in particular with our 4 year old son who is also ASD/ ADHD and it was a success. Thankyou love all your videos.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It is very good that Simon is already saying thank you. I was at least nine years old (if not ten) (right around the age that I started to be able to experience embarrassment fairly consistently in certain situations) before I could say “thank you” (even with a reminder (like Simon does in this video)).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Andrea Olson just uploaded a video to KZbin (based on one of her blog entries with the same title as her video) titled “How to tell when it’s potty time”. The tips in that video are primarily for infants and for young toddlers but they might potentially work for any child who is not speaking or signing yet (or even just not speaking or signing yet about needing to “go”). I just watched that video a short time ago this morning and it seems to me that it might be a good supplement to this video especially with children who are either not yet verbal or who are still early in the toilet training process.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@ericlee6495]

7 ahead family thanks for sharing your thoughts

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Given that you just finished a road trip/vacation to San Diego recently you might want to think back on anything you might have done during the trip to work on Ezra’s toilet training and anything you might have needed to do to keep Simon’s training on track (or as on track as possible under the circumstances (whichever one it might be)) during the trip. Essentially the idea is that viewers may benefit from a video about potty training and travel. This video could cover the most recent trip and any earlier trips to various destinations that might be relevant. Some of the subjects covered could include: 1. Toilet training routines (if any) 2. Rewards or other incentives (if any) 3. Minimizing the frequency of accidents and the effects of them should they occur 4. Dealing with any accidents that might occur (getting the point across while still keeping it subtle) 5. Dealing with toileting or other regressions that might occur during travel 6. Introducing new restroom environments and encouraging their use You could cover other topics in addition if you think of them but these are probably the main ones.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Interesting. Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good that Simon uses the toilet very well during the day. How is Simon with communicating his needs in this area? Does he know the following phrases (and perhaps some like them). 1.”I want potty.” 2.”I went potty.” 3.”I’m going potty.” 4.”I have to go potty.” 5. The above phrases but the words pee (or pee-pee) or poo (or poo-poo) instead of “potty”. These phrases can be useful especially in unfamiliar locations away from home. Later on he can learn to ask where the bathroom is if he doesn’t already know the location of the bathroom (e.g. in a new park,store,etc.)

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing!

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good to see that this video has been uploaded and parents or guardians can begin to benefit from the tips in this video.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks! You gave us some good ideas.

[@7Aheadfamily]

You helped us out with a lot of these ideas. :-) Thanks for all your comments on the subject. 😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding some of the pros and cons of potty chairs: Pros: 1. If the potty chair is placed in front of a heating duct it can be warm during the Winter months and that might help during the earliest stages of training. I remember that this helped me when I was first learning between the ages of three-and-a-half and four. 2. Experience with using potty chairs can help during traffic jams and similar situations where the alternative would be using a disposable of some kind (such as disposable training pants), or alternatively a car seat protector if one exists for a specific car seat and has been tested and approved by the car seat manufacturer. 3. The sound of liquid hitting plastic can sound somewhat like white noise. Some people find the sound of white noise to be relaxing. 4. A potty chair can be placed in almost any location including a favorite hiding spot (such as a corner or behind a couch). In some instances this might make the transition easier. Cons: 1. As mentioned in this video it essentially involves toilet training twice instead of once. 2. The use of a potty chair involves extra cleaning during that portion of the training process. 3. The sound of liquid hitting plastic could be too loud in some instances. The effects of this could be reduced using noise canceling headphones or earplugs (for example).

[@7Aheadfamily]

❤️❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

One important skill that relates to this is remembering to take regular breaks during play and while learning a new skill. Sometimes when kids are learning to read and write (for example) they can forget to take regular bathroom breaks. If a mishap happens because of this it can be used as an opportunity to teach new words like “puddle”, “accident”, and other similar words whether spoken or written. In time this can improve communication skills. From what I remember this is how I learned those two words (and some others like them).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!❤❤

[@littlejonathorn6860]

Very important topic!!!

[@7Aheadfamily]

Agreed! Thank you ❤️.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding High Chairs and Potty Training: In the Rugrats episode titled “Daddy’s Little Helpers” Chuckie is sitting in his high chair and eating a lot of baby food. While he’s sitting there his gastrocolic reflex activates. I won’t say what happened next but you can probably imagine well enough. At this point in the series it can be estimated that Chuckie has been potty training for up to a year. While the series does not specify whether Chuckie is neurotypical or neurodiverse it would be reasonable to suppose that Chuckie is either neurotypical or level one. From what I have read (in books and articles) the way the series depicted toilet training is fairly realistic. This means there’s a good chance that if Simon were still using a high chair his training today would likely be about where it was in around August or September of last year instead of him being trained since around last Thanksgiving. This means that potentially the more progress you make with transitioning Ezra out of his high chair the more progress you can expect to see with his toilet training. You will still have more work to do after that but this step should help significantly. Also, when mishaps do occur you can have him assist in the cleanup process as much as he is developmentally ready for. I’m on the spectrum (currently level one but I was level two during childhood) and when I had accidents of either or both kinds at Ezra’s age (or even shortly after my ninth birthday) that’s how my mother helped me and this is a big part of how I went from being maybe ninety-to-ninety-five percent daytime trained to being one hundred percent daytime trained.

[@7Aheadfamily]

I really appreciate your thoughtful comment. Your personal experience adds a lot of depth to the conversation about potty training. It’s wonderful to hear how your mother guided you through it, and I hope Ezra’s journey is just as successful! ❤❤❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good that technology exists now to pause TV shows and movies. I didn’t have this at home in the late 1970s and early 1980s when I was still training and that almost certainly slowed the training process down a bit for me.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@butterflyqueen2600]

I just started with my 1st and I'm not sure what to do, lucky it's only been a few days thanks for the advice i will try this😊

[@7Aheadfamily]

You got this!❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I remember when I was younger and still using a potty chair (so before age four) I wasn’t able to undo the button on my shorts and I didn’t know how to ask for help yet so at least three times I felt the need to “go” and sat down on the potty chair with my shorts still on. Needless to say I needed a bath whenever this happened. One time when this happened my mother was in the kitchen making spaghetti and meatballs. Another time when I wasn’t feeling well (I think I had a cold) my mother was in the kitchen making chicken noodle soup for me. And yet another time my mother was taking a nap on the couch. In all three instances that I can remember I ended up having a bath just before dinner. I have read on various blogs that it is not uncommon for kids in general to do this off and on when they are toilet training.

[@7Aheadfamily]

We keep Ezra is sweatpants for that reason, so it’s easier for him to be independent (you have a very good memory)

[@thomasschoeck9080]

From what I remember the first toilet that I learned to use outside of the house was the one at my preschool. It looks like Simon followed the same pattern.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Yeah he did. Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@ It looks like this is one of many benefits of preschool. My father and mother both studied education (and some other topics) in college. My father sees preschool and kindergarten as “glorified babysitting”. My mother and I (on the other hand) recognize that some teaching and learning occurs as early as this point in one’s education.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I woke up about an hour ago mostly because I was thirsty and because it was getting warm in my apartment and I remembered some early memories of waking up during night and having to “go”. During that time (around age four) I would wake up with a full bladder (for instance) and given where my communication skills were at that point in time in combination with not being able to climb out of my own toddler bed (which was essentially a large crib) I would basically have two choices. The first choice was to lie there and wait for the accident. The second choice was to avoid the experience of “having an accident” by opting to use the pamper voluntarily. Typically I would opt for the second option. I would imagine that with Ezra needing the safety bed for his safety as I needed my toddler bed/large crib for my own safety given that I was very curious and I would sometimes try to wander off I would guess that Ezra would sometimes find himself in similar situations. When this occurs he would likely opt to find a comfortable position and use the nighttime diaper voluntarily just like I used to do. Given the circumstances a certain amount of this is probably inevitable. There might be two or three ways that you can reduce how often Ezra needs to do this. The first (which you may already be doing) is to check on him every so often during the night and see if he is awake. If he is you can let him out of his safety bed and offer him food, a drink, or a bathroom break. You may want to offer the bathroom break first in that situation. If he does not need to go yet you can offer food and/or a drink. After that you can wait maybe five to fifteen minutes and offer him another bathroom break. By that time it is fairly likely that his gastrocolic reflex would be working and he would need to go at the point. After that he would probably be ready to go back to bed. The second option (if he doesn’t cry or make other sounds when he wakes up) is to have something set up that will let you know when he wakes up. Maybe there’s some way that cameras and some type of AI software can help with this. Finally, as Ezra learns more about the features of his tablet (including how to text) he may be able to wake up in his safety bed, notice that he needs to go (for example) and let you know that he needs something. I don’t know if anyone has written any texting apps (with a focus on pictures, and short words and phrases) that would make this easier for someone who is just learning how to text but if there is such an app it might help in this type of situation. Maybe you can ask his therapist and his teachers if they know of any apps like this. For example, if Ezra needs to go he could text a picture of a toilet (for example). If he is hungry or thirsty he could text a picture of something related to this. This would (occasionally) give him the option of letting you know that he needs go instead of the less ideal option of having to take care of it in his safety bed himself to the best of his ability. On occasion this might happen anyway (batteries drain, and texts don’t always go through) but noticing his needs during the night when it is possible should help both his self-esteem and his toilet training. It will probably also help him with working on his communication skills and letting you know what he needs during the daylight hours as well.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤❤❤ Thank you for all of those suggestions.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just asking Microsoft Copilot some hypothetical questions a short time ago about the pros and cons of using visual schedules during training and it was almost all pros. One of the only cons is that sometimes the individual in training might occasionally “go” too early based on the clock times depicted on the schedule if he or she is able to look at the clock and determine what time it is. It also mentioned that for some children even these mistakes can represent important potty training milestones in their own right and that they can sometimes be good first steps when one is starting to learn. Based on the output it would seem that this type of mistake is fairly common at level two up to around age five or six (or even almost seven) and at level one up to about age three or four (or even almost five). I did not ask about PDA in combination with this because with a free account you can only ask 30 questions at a time but I would imagine that it would be somewhere in the range that I mentioned above. It was also indicated that such mishaps are most common in situations like long car rides or traffic jams and as long as he or she only wears training pants or has a car seat protector for unusual situations like these it shouldn’t effect training all that much overall. When I asked Copilot how such mistakes should be handled it answered by saying that it is a good idea to praise the child for recognizing and following the schedule but also to balance it out by explaining in terms that the child can understand why it is even better to wait for the toilet especially when there is one nearby. It was mentioned that more praise or a larger reward when the rest room is successfully used (versus a smaller reward (and/or less praise) for observing and following the schedule regardless of the outcome) can be a good approach especially when one is first learning and/or first learning to generalize one’s training. It also indicated that similar mistakes can also occur in other new or stressful situations and that those mistakes should be handled similarly. After a while the rewards (and praise) can be gradually phased out over time and the car seat protector and training pants can left home for shopping trips and shorter car rides after some initial success is observed over a period of time.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤❤❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

The next toilet training areas you can work on with Simon are using the toilet standing up, followed by nighttime training. There is no rush with either of these. My father started working on the “going standing up” skill with me when I was tall enough to get on the toilet and use it without assistance. For me this was around age four-and-a-half. When Simon is a bit older his father or one of his older brothers can show him how to do this. Regarding nighttime training one thing that Simon can work on (which ties in with becoming more independent) is being able to put on and take off his own nighttime diapers. Also being able to put on and take off his own pajamas can help in this regard (provided that he wakes up in time). The rest of it just comes down to a combination of bladder capacity and waking up in a timely enough fashion. For the vast majority of kids this eventually comes in time. Usually there’s not much (if anything) that can be done to speed this up to any significant degree.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Two toilet training suggestions that might help someone who is on the spectrum: 1. Get siblings (especially younger siblings) involved in the process. This is a good idea as long as the sibling is willing to help out and any help given is completely voluntary. A little over a day ago I rewatched the video about the shopping trip to Dollar Tree. This time I rewatched the video on my TV using the Chromecast. Only then did I realize how much better my TV’s sound is than my iPad even with good headphones. I am mentioning this because toward the very end of the video I noticed a detail that I missed on previous viewings. In the scene when you are in the garage just before you mentioned that he is “still training” (or something to that effect) and that “it comes with the territory” I noticed Marie saying something about helping Simon. To me this means at least one of two things. First, Marie might have been willing to help Simon to clean up after what happened earlier. Second, Marie might had Simon sit on the toilet and practice his training for a short time (e.g. between one and five minutes (but not more than that)). Simon and Marie seem to be pretty close and he may have sometimes felt less pressure trying for her than he would sitting there trying for you. The fact that they are both young probably helps with this. This wasn’t really an option back in the late 1970s and early 1980s when I was training because my sister was not interested (despite only a four year age difference) but with Simon and Marie it seems to work (given that she seems to be interested in learning some of the basic details of taking care of a younger sibling). On a related note I am wondering if some of Ezra’s feeding issues could be worsened by “nerves”. I already know that he has acid reflux. If he is also nervous about having to eat in front of you that might sometimes worsen the situation. If Marie (for example) helps out with feeding Ezra from time to time he might be more willing to eat for her. Naturally you will want to have an iPhone or other camera set up nearby to make sure that he actually eats if no one else is watching at the moment. This way you will know if the food is eaten that Ezra is the one eating it. This is important because sometimes if a sibling eats some of the food to show the other sibling how delicious the food is (in order to motivate the other sibling to try some) it is possible to overestimate how much food the one you are tying to feed actually eats. This was probably never an issue in my case because my sister rarely (if ever) got involved with either my toilet training or my feeding (or even feeding the family dog (or the Guinea Pig, for that matter) but that’s another story) but in some instances it can be important. Second 2. Celebrate and reward partial successes (if any occur). There are two ways that partial successes can occur. First: Especially if the child is close to being fully daytime trained he or she may have a partial wetting accident and be able to cut the flow maybe up to halfway through. In this instance the parent (or perhaps a sibling) can have him or her sit on the toilet and try to finish if possible. It is possible (especially if Simon only emptied himself out partway in his car seat and managed to cut the flow) that maybe Marie did this with Simon after the shopping trip to Dollar Tree. If so, then maybe he was able to “go” a little bit (perhaps even up to half way) for Marie and got an Oreo cookie (or other reward) in combination with a “good boy Simon!”, etc. from Marie. I noticed that Simon’s daytime training seemed to wrap up not long after this (aside from at least one one or two minor regressions in the scheme of things) so maybe events unfolded more or less how I pictured them. On a related note you could perhaps encourage such partial successes with Ezra and use them as part of his training. As soon as you are confident that Ezra understands the concepts of “peeing” and “pooping” you could have him sit on your lap (without a diaper on (so will know right away if he starts or stops going)) if he hasn’t “gone” in a while. While he is sitting there you could read a story to him about toilet training or perhaps watch a short video about it. During this video or story (or slightly after) you could have him try to wet on your lap for maybe about five seconds (to the count of five) and then see if he can stop the flow after starting. This might be useful if Ezra still doesn’t mind being wet (or perhaps even likes it). This way the wetness itself could actually serve as a reward. A little while after this (if he is able to successfully cut the flow after starting) you can have him sit on the toilet and finish there and get a cookie (or other reward) for finishing on the toilet. On a related note you will want to go over the concepts of “wet” and “dry” with Ezra (if you are not already doing this). Also in the regression section of this video you mentioned a “puddle in the corner”. Does this mean that Simon was beginning to hide before going shortly before he finished training? It is not quite clear from what was mentioned. Or did he just sometimes get too involved while playing with toy cars, blocks, legos, etc. while playing in the corner sometimes and have an accident here and there for that reason? If Simon was starting to hide then it’s possible that Ezra might start making some progress (however minor) soon (since he likes to hide before “going” sometimes and that is often described in books and articles (as well as many blogs) as sign of toilet training readiness. While I was training back in the late 1970s and early 1980s this was not an option for me because I only learned how to cut the flow after starting when I was about one to two years older that Ezra is now. Yes, I was actually nine to ten years old when I figured out how to do this even though most neurotypical kids learn this any time between ages two and five. This is probably because I was level two on the spectrum (I’m now level one) when I was younger. In addition I also have a very mild form of cerebral palsy and that also might have had some effect on this (although some doctors, nurses, etc. who I have talked to over the years don’t really know if that played a role in this or not). I have noticed that only a small number of toilet training books and articles (or even blogs) seem to mention the importance of celebrating partial successes. I have heard and read that the reason for this is that most toilet training books and articles (as well as many blogs) are geared toward getting a neurotypical child toilet trained. Since (typically) a neurotypical child will be more devious than an autistic child (although a few rare exceptions exist here and there there, especially in some instances of level one autism) the concern is that a neurotypical child will play games and maximize their rewards by “going” a little bit, finishing on the toilet, getting a cookie or other reward, and frequently repeating this to get as many cookies (or other rewards) as he or she wants. This type of devious behavior is quite rare for kids on the spectrum (even at level one) so for current purposes it is probably almost a non-issue unless a parent absolutely one hundred percent knows for a fact that a child on the spectrum is doing this. Second: The other way to celebrate partial successes is to have the child try to poop on the toilet after either a full or partial wetting accident. There shouldn’t be any pressure to this and he or she will only need to try for maybe five minutes at the most regardless of whether there are any results. If he or she is able to poop he or she can be rewarded for this (e.g. with a cookie). For now that’s about all I can think of on this subject.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thanks.

[@VikramS-l4g]

It's so good to see Simon doing so well. At what age he started saying "Yes/No" to your questions? When did you start potty training for him?

[@7Aheadfamily]

He started saying yes and no when he just turned 3. When he was 3.5

[@VikramS-l4g]

@@7Aheadfamily Thanks for the response. Keep up the good work

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7AheadfamilyThen Simon was just starting his training around the time that he saw the doctor to have a new strap put on the braces on his feet (and on his first day of preschool). That would explain why he was still working more on the mechanics of “going” than the specific location. That was still a very good first step in his training (including that initial step of learning to “go” sitting down in a car seat or on a lap). Since then he has made excellent progress in the “where to do it” part to the point where he is completely toilet trained (for all intents and purposes) during the day or very nearly so. That’s a lot of progress to make in just four months. The remaining steps (it would seem) consist of learning some communication skills, how to use a toilet, tree, or urinal standing up (if he hasn’t learned this yet) and (eventually) nighttime training. Technically there’s no rush on the nighttime portion of his training. Even if he doesn’t master that in the next year or two it doesn’t really matter in the long run. From what I remember from my own childhood kids don’t really start making fun of other kids all that much for not being nighttime trained until at least second grade (if not third or even fourth). And that was all the way back in the 1980s when it was much more stylish for kids to make fun of this.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Earlier today I was asking Microsoft Copilot about some hypotheticals involving someone with Ezra’s diagnosis and approximate level of speech (roughly six words or fewer) and his age. I asked it some hypotheticals based on the idea of possibly gaining some insight into how well Ezra may able to distinguish various concepts even in situations that may involve some level of stress. For example if you see Ezra “going” either or both ways (as it were) when he’s in a car seat, in a high chair, or on mom’s lap (for example) while eating you could ask him where he is “going” or whatever word you might use for that. Microsoft copilot estimated that if it were evening and if someone in approximately his situation were wearing a nighttime diaper the most likely responses (on an app like the one Ezra uses) in order (from most to least likely) would be as follows: I. Diaper II. High Chair, Car Seat, or Lap III High Chair Potty, Car Seat Potty, Lap Potty IV. Potty High Chair, Potty Car Seat, Potty Lap Seeing responses III or IV could allow you to notice any conceptual confusion and possibly help with finding a cause for any otherwise unexplained mishaps. I also asked copilot for hypotheticals at level two and level one and it indicated that at all three autism levels these conceptual confusions are possible but the closer one is to level one the less frequent these mix-ups tend to be (on average).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Interesting. Thank you so much for sharing.❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Some additional observations about potty training dos and don’ts: I was looking at some potty-training-related web sites earlier today and a little bit of yesterday (sort of a minor special interest of mine) and I noticed a couple of potty training ideas that might be useful for some readers even if they don’t necessarily apply to you. One idea that I saw mentioned was the idea of a potty chart on the wall that the child who is training can see. Back when I was growing up this was not done so I couldn’t see how I was doing from week to week. Your idea of a timer that the child can see is a good one for children who already have a basic understanding of time (as most potty training children probably do). If you mentioned a potty training chart it would have been a minor part of what was covered in the video and I don’t remember it from past viewings. It is a commonly used idea these days to the point where you can go to pretty much any online art site and enter the phrase “potty chart” or “potty training chart” and find either a photograph or an artistic rendering of one. In most renditions a drawing (or a sticker, perhaps) of a sun is used to represent a successful trip to the bathroom and a storm cloud is used to represent an accident. One suggestion I would make regarding such a chart is that such a chart should be for daytime toilet training only. I have also noticed from talking to some parents and grandparents that I know that potty charts seem to work best for neurotypical kids, produce some results for kids who are level one, and for kids who are level two or level three they may or may not produce any results. For example, a person I know has a grandson who is level two and she tried a potty chart with him the summer before last (for one entire month) when he was four-and-a-half. At both the beginning of the month and at the end he was only maybe twenty-five percent dry at best. Now he is doing much better (but still learning). This would seem to just be a result of the passage of time, (and perhaps a little bit of neurological development) though. With Simon being level one you might want to keep a combination of a daytime potty chart and a reward system in mind for the future if you notice any significant regression from him over the next couple of years. For now though he is trained and does not need these things at this time. Some artists portray a character having a nighttime chart to show them how they are doing and to (supposedly) motivate nighttime dryness. From what I have read bed-wetting is not typically caused by any motivational or behavioral issues. If that happens at all it would probably account for fewer than ten percent of all bed-wetting cases. Wetting at night out of laziness, anger, or spite is rare enough to be nearly unheard of. Therefore a night-time chart (while a popular idea in TV shows, movies, and other media) would likely not work for neurotypical kids let alone kids who are on the spectrum. Also regarding potty training and road trips. If you decide to take any road trips this summer it would be best for Simon to deal with any potty emergencies when on the road by using a portable urinal (if possible) when he is in the car. This won’t prevent all accidents but it should prevent most of them when he is awake. I also noticed from looking at Andrea Olsen’s elimination communication blog that she sells products to help keep car seats clean in the event of accidents. I don’t know if that idea (let alone the specific products) would work for someone older like Simon or Ezra (as an alternative to pull-ups, Easy Ups, Goodnites, or Ninjamas) but it is one idea that is worth considering. One word of caution, though. Products like these are not safe to use with all possible car seats (because the straps need to fit in a very specific way for safety reasons in the event of sudden starts and stops, car crashes, etc.). Consult the car seat’s documentation and reach out to the car seat manufacturer for any questions on this. Some car seat manufacturers can recommend specific products that have been tested (e.g. in crash tests) to work with their specific car seat. They may even sell such products on their web site (or through a catalog (if they still have one)). Regarding wetting accidents, etc. and learning in general on vacations/long road trips: In the event that one or both kids have a potty training regression during a long road trip/vacation this is not a time to put all learning on hold (Even if you end up putting toilet training on hold temporarily). For example I’m level one now but I was level two when I was growing up. On the trip to Old Saybrook, Connecticut at age four-and-three quarters that I mentioned in some earlier comments I had a toilet training regression but during that trip I learned about other things that were not related to this. For example, during that trip I learned about what washing machines were for, how to use a coin-operated washer and dryer, the differences between top-loading and front-loading washers, how to use an indoor shower and an outdoor shower, and what life preservers are for. For me that trip was almost certainly worthwhile even with the potty training regression that it entailed. After my family returned home it took anywhere from a week to a month (probably more like a month) for my daytime training to be (at least pretty much) back on track. The possibility of regressions like this is why I have suggested in past postings (and still suggest) that whenever possible any vacations and road trips occur in the first half of summer (at the latest) whenever someone is either recently trained (like Simon) or in the middle of training (like Ezra). This provides at least a couple of weeks to a month to get things back on track if needed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@Alleyywalleyy]

I’m

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I woke up a few hours ago. Two reasons for this were hunger and thirst. Shortly after waking up and having some bottled water I remembered one thing that motivated me during training that might seem unconventional. I remembered that when I was about four or five one of my favorite parts of the process was watching the water in the toilet turn yellow. I’m on the spectrum (currently level one, but I was level two during childhood) and I remember that I also enjoyed watching the bath water change color for the same reason when I was that age. I asked Microsoft Copilot about whether my experience with this is unique and Copilot told me that my experience is not unique and that many children participate in this form of sensory play because it satisfies their curiosity and it can be comforting. It also indicated that in some instances it can be even more comforting to someone on the spectrum. I then asked if this indicates regression or an absence of training and it told me that someone who does this is usually not regressing and it does not indicate that a child is not trained. I also mentioned to copilot that I would sometimes do this until I was about eight or nine and copilot indicated that given my circumstances it was normal and completely understandable. This means that in the event that Simon decides to do this (for example after deciding not to use the toilet before bath time) don’t worry about it he’s still trained and this is pretty much par for the course around his age. If Ezra does this don’t worry about it he’s still learning and it can still happen to anyone around his age. Also this will go down the drain just like the bath water and using the soap during bath time will keep them clean. You could choose to drain the bath water in this situation but that step is technically optional. In the event that this causes the other type of accident (that would usually be uncommon but still possible) you might want to have some type of bucket or scoop available (or maybe one of those things that they sell in pet stores for cleaning out fish tanks) to facilitate the cleanup process. When this happens they can help with cleaning up their accident to a degree that they are developmentally ready for. Needless to say in this situation draining the bath water and using at least soap and water to clean the tub would be essential. I remember that Andrea Olson has some tips for dealing with these type of situations in some of her blog entries and videos on the subject of elimination communication. Elimination Communication has its pros and cons but even for people not practicing it some of the ideas in her blog entries and videos might be applicable (like the idea of covering the sensor on an automatic flush toilet with one of those sticky notes like the ones they sell in office supply stores) and some of her tips for reading cues to help with determining that it may be time for a rest room visit. For the moment this pretty much sums up my observations and recollections on this topic.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your observations! They are so detailed its amazing!❤❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

My parents (and probably some other relatives) could tell any number of stories about my regressions (some as late as when I was in kindergarten). Such regressions are part of the reason why I needed to change over to a different kindergarten class in the same school with a smaller class size where the teacher could read my cues (e.g. the potty dance). Fortunately I was pretty much back on track before first grade and able to start first grade on schedule.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@sebaswow40]

Thank you so much for this video. My daughter is 3, autistic and nonverbal, and this has been a massive struggle. There is almost no content out there for how to go about this with a kid on the spectrum and this is the first one I have found. Thank you!

[@7Aheadfamily]

We are happy to help!💕💕

[@7Aheadfamily]

We also have this video that might help!🩷🩷 My Child has Autism. Now What? kzbin.info/www/bejne/oZKalYmnfNhgmas

[@7Aheadfamily]

Tell us what you think❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

One thing you could try to begin transitioning Ezra out of his high chair is to have him sometimes sit on your lap while eating. My mother started doing this with me when I was four years old and by age five I no longer needed my high chair. I was level two when I was growing up (I’m currently level one). By this point Ezra should be ready to begin this transition. You can start small by having him eat a snack while sitting on your lap. When you are away from the house (especially in an outdoor setting) you may need to have him sit in his stroller to eat so he doesn’t wander off. There are two benefits to transitioning him away from the high chair: 1. First, if he needs to use the toilet during a meal or a snack he might be able to sometimes get there in time if he is not in his high chair. If you need to get him out of his high chair there might not be enough time for this. At this point you might put him in his high chair in the morning (for breakfast) and right after school (for an after school snack) and let him do whatever he needs to in those situations if it makes him more comfortable (unless he shows signs of wanting to use the toilet before this such as pulling your arm and taking you to the bathroom like he did on that one Sunday morning). If he acts like he wants to get out of his high chair (even during those times) it could be an indication that he needs (and wants) to use the toilet and on those occasions you can take him to the bathroom. With this approach you’re not really aiming for one hundred percent toilet usage (even at this point) but over time you’re trying to get him there more and more. As time goes on he will probably indicate with his tablet more often when he needs (and wants) to go and that will reduce any guesswork about when you need to take him to the bathroom. On a related note Andrea Olson’s Elimination Communication blog and KZbin channel has a video about transition times in which it might make sense to offer a bathroom break (called a “pottytunity” in elimination communication). While you are not technically doing elimination communication with Ezra (given his age) some of her ideas such as offering a bathroom break at certain times like just before a meal, just after a meal, just before a bath, and just after a bath (and other similar transition times) might be helpful. You won’t get results every time but some results are better than none. You don’t necessarily need to offer a bathroom break every time. For example, first thing in the morning Ezra might be too tired, and right after school he might be too stressed out and/or too tired. During other times you will probably get some results when offering a bathroom break. 2. If his stomach becomes upset he might be able to make it to the sink before vomiting if he’s not in a high chair. Later on as he gets older and his nausea is less severe you can have him attempt to reach the toilet for this as well. Over time you will also begin to see results in this area. For now, this pretty much sums up my thoughts on this.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️ That’s an interesting idea.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Some suggestions regarding potty training, bike riding, and keeping things on track: It is good that Simon is both potty trained during the day and learning to ride a bike. One issue that I had when I was learning to ride a bike was getting too involved in what I was doing and not making it to the bathroom in time. I was about eight years old at the time (so twice as old as Simon). Part of the reason that this happened with me is likely that I was level two when I was younger. Simon is level one but even being trained for as long as he has it would not be uncommon for something like this to happen especially on longer bike rides. You can reduce the frequency of any such accidents by buying Simon a portable urinal (available at pretty much any drug store) and having it available for him to use should it be necessary in any location where restrooms may not be readily available. Something like a large towel or picnic blanket could help in any situations where he would need some level of privacy. That way he can be out of view when necessary to minimize any embarrassment (for example). A portable urinal might also help with Simon’s nighttime training when he starts to wake up dry. If for any reason (including not being able to get the bedroom door open in time, fear of the dark, etc.) Simon wakes up dry and can’t make it all the way to the bathroom the portable urinal will give him something that he can use instead of a pull-up, diaper, or something similar in these circumstances. That being said there will probably be some accidents anyway (for a while at least) just like in the bike riding scenario but this will make it possible to minimize these enough to avoid any significant regressions and at Simon’s age that’s the main objective. In Ezra’s case you will probably want to continue his toilet training at home for about another two or three weeks. Depending on where Ezra is in his training by then you might also want to have him ride the bike without a diaper on and get him a portable urinal of his own that he can use on bike rides (and other outdoor settings where a restroom might not be available) to keep accidents to a minimum. Maybe Simon and Ezra’s urinals can be kept in a back pack (or something similar) and they can use them during breaks after the bike stops as needed. For long car rides there are urinal bags available (usually on a drug store’s incontinence aisle) that can be placed inside the urinal to keep the risk of spills fairly low. I noticed those bags on the incontinence aisle at a Walgreens last year when I was walking down that aisle during the time that I was dealing with an 8 millimeter kidney stone and the wide variety of symptoms that it was causing. But that’s a whole other story. For now I think this covers the main observations that I have on this topic.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Those are some really good ideas and insights. Thank you for sharing them with us.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

A note about toilet training, training pants, and traveling (e.g. over Thanksgiving or Christmas): It not uncommon for parents to use disposable training pants (such as pull-ups or easy ups) while traveling (on long road trips) on kids who are as recently trained as Simon is because a rest room may not always be available the minute that it is needed. Here are some tips that I have heard from parents and grandparents of recently trained kids that can be useful for keeping the car clean while minimizing any toilet training regressions. 1. Bring plenty of underwear and changes of clothes. You will likely need these even if it’s just because of possible motion sickness. 2. Another reason to bring plenty of underwear: To minimize the chance of a recently toilet trained child simply using the training pants like a regular diaper it is best to put a pair of underwear inside the training pants so that he or she will feel wet if he or she “goes”. To minimize the chance of leaking it is best to make sure that the underpants are completely inside the training pants including waistband and leg elastics (if at all possible). 3. Even if the child will mostly be using his training pants during trip it is best to maintain as much toilet training as possible by taking him to the toilet after meals and snacks at any rest area even if you are pretty sure that he has already “gone”. He doesn’t necessarily need to “go” but it necessary to try each time for up to three or even five minutes. 4. If at all possible only use diapers at night at the destination. 5. If the child will be swimming use swim diapers such as Little Swimmers or Splashers. These look like a bathing suit (sort of) while still providing any protection needed for any accidental “movements” (as it were) while swimming. This pretty much sums up what I have to say about training pants and traveling.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. 💜❤️💜

[@aprilmay4992]

Great video, thanks for the tips. Always enjoy your videos. ❤

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

The thing that Simon is drawing on reminds me of an Etch-a-sketch. I started using one of those when I was very young. It might have been during potty training, or it might have been later. I’m not completely sure which at the moment. This might be a good toy to consider if you want a child to be able to draw while sitting on the toilet without the possibility of dropping a pencil, crayon, or stylus into the toilet.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

You’re right about avoiding potty chairs if at all possible. Some kids do actually need to toilet train twice if one is used. I know I was one of them. Here is essentially what happened to me. My parents started potty training me with a potty chair between 18 months and 2 years. It took until I was about three-and-a-half years old before they saw any results. Shortly after that I was basically trained on the potty chair. Then I turned four and my parents decided that I was too old for the potty chair and they threw it away. At that point I didn’t use any toilets for a long time. It might have been as long as two or three months. Even after this my re-training was just beginning and it took well over a year after that for me to be trained well enough to get into kindergarten. But that’s another story.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing ❤️ yes that transition can be tough.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

When I was growing up I had some regressions at a later age than usual. I remember having a regression similar to what Simon had in this video when I was in third grade (age nine). This was just at the point when I was beginning to experience embarrassment. My mother noticed that I was constipated because I was at a garage sale and I was squatting down next to a tree and trying to soil my underwear. A short time after that I was still trying to “go” when I was sitting in the back seat of the car on the way home. Fortunately (in a way) neither effort produced any results. One of the last times that I did that previously (from what I can remember) was about three years earlier at age six under similar circumstances. I think it happened this late for me because I was level two by today’s standards. I was pretty much back to normal (or my version of normal) after my constipation was cleared up with a combination of drinking some prune juice and being given an enema.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@TravelTimeChannel]

Im new to the channel, thank you for all the helpful information that you have provided. You guys are really kind and patient. Im a father of a 3 and a half years old boy with lvl 2 autism and at the moment our boy just learned to go to potty🤩🤩 and we finally removed the nappies during day time. Any advise how to remove it from night time too? Does Simon use nappies during sleep time?

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I seem to remember that he still wears them at night and he’s usually dry when he wakes up.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing!❤ He still wears them at night but they are usually dry😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I think you mentioned in an earlier video that Ezra has some places in the house where he likes to hide to “do his thing” (as it were). From the sound of it he seems to be experiencing some level of embarrassment or self-consciousness especially when it comes to “going”. Almost all neurotypical children and many who are level one do this at some point during their toddler years. In my case (being level two when I was younger) I never went through the “hiding” phase. My sister is level one and she started hiding when she was no older than three-and-a-half to four according to my parents. I wasn’t born yet for most of this and was too young to remember her training for the small amount that I was around for. I think her training was pretty much finished (at least during the day) by the time I was six months old. If Ezra still likes to hide when he uses his diaper you could try getting either a camping or medical type potty chair in his size and placing it in one of his favorite hiding spots. With any luck you might already have some supplies for this left over from your RV days. If not, you can probably find what you need at a larger-sized pharmacy, at a medical supply store, or in a store that sells camping supplies. You can even have Ezra make the potty chair his own in some way even if it’s just something as basic as decorating it with stickers. As for what he should wear at home for this portion of his toilet training you should have him wear something with an elastic waistband like sweatpants or most of the pajama bottoms on the market for someone his age. Some other options include more regular style pants or shorts that just happen to have an elastic waistband. Under that he can wear underwear, a goodnite, a ninjamas, or pretty much anything that he can put on and take off himself. Goodnites (and similar products) can be a bit cheaper if they are bought in packages that contain a large number of them. Despite their name Goodnites are said to work well at nighttime and during the day. Also they come in enough sizes that Ezra will likely be able to fit in them for as long as he needs them (Goodnites go all the way up to around 140 pounds, currently). Ezra’s existing diapers will probably continue to work well enough when you are out and about (if they still fit). This pretty much sums up my observations on this subject for the time being.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Love that! Thank you for the great ideas ❤️.

[@leaecila]

My autistic boy is 5years now and non verbal, he keeps hiding in specific spots when he wants to pee or poo, it's been so difficult to handle him potty wise, this comment is of great help, thank you!

[@darkchipz3016]

Thanks for the video, it's really helpful!

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@Sonicfan-cc1te]

For me as someone with mild autism potty training took way longer for me. I think I was completely potty trained during the day at some point when I was 7 and became completely potty trained day and night when I was 8. I remember that I often wouldn’t even be able to communicate needing to use the bathroom at a lot of times and would often hold it during the day especially at school. Friends who were a few years younger than me were completely potty trained while I was still having accidents even during the day. Wheras for my older brother with severe autism he didn’t become fully potty trained until fairly recently. Even now he uses things as toilets that aren’t even toilets. He also went through a long phase of smearing #2 all over his room luckily he eventually learned not to do that by watching our dad clean it up. Hasn’t been doing it since. He also has a camping toilet in his room since he’s locked in his room at night. But I remember our parents would get very frustrated with us for constantly having accidents and sometimes even yell at us. One time a while back I was at a party that involved a sleepover that I couldn’t stay at because I was still having accidents pretty much every night and I was upset about that. I also had a chart about accidents I had at night and it varied for a while but eventually I got it and I’m glad that’s over with now.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good to hear that Simon seems to be pretty much trained both day and night. It sounds like Ezra is also making progress. In the event that Ezra’s training starts to slide a bit at some point you might want to see if you can get him a potty training watch that takes standard watch band sizes. That way even if the watch band that is included is too small for him you could buy a watch band in his size and then use one that fits for as long as he needs it.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Ezra is making progress with his potty training❤❤

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your ideas💕💕

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Here’s another toilet training skill that parents sometimes (or even often) overlook: Children are usually taught fairly quickly that “#1 and #2” go into the toilet. Then one day the child experiences nausea and vomiting and doesn’t know what to do. This can lead to some fairly predictable results. Sometimes one or more parent will erroneously think that knowing what to do in this situation is “just common sense” because they know what to do and they don’t remember a time when they did not know what to do in this situation. This happened to me on Thanksgiving when I was six years old and I was car sick and also the dinner did not agree with me. After that I knew that it was necessary to head to the bathroom if I felt nauseous.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding the use of the word “independent”: When I was younger one mistake my parents (especially my mother, but not exclusively) made was to almost exclusively use the word “independent” to mean “stubborn”. Therefore it was not uncommon after I had an accident (at any age) and was cleaned up for my mother to pick up the phone, call her mother, and tell her that I was probably never going to be toilet trained and that I was being really “independent” lately. For most of the time that this happened I was not embarrassed by this just confused. My ability to feel embarrassed only started to work when I was about nine years old and became more consistent around ten or so. I guess this is probably a result of being level two on the spectrum back then. Even at that age I was still having some daytime accidents of both kinds and my mother would call her mother to complain about it and say some things along the lines of “I thought he was finally potty trained but I guess I was wrong!”. Those accidents were actually embarrassing but not the ones when I was younger. I finally stopped having daytime accidents (of both kinds) by the end of grade school (about age eleven). Many of those were a result of getting too involved in playing or other activities. Before that with each year accidents became less common but they still happened from time to time. In short if you use the word “independent” try not to use it to mean “stubborn” at least not when you are toilet training at least one kid. At best it is confusing. As you might imagine I only ended up learning the main use of the word “independent” many years later when I learned about the Declaration of Independence in eighth grade history at about age fourteen. I previously heard the primary use of the word independent from the elf who visited the island of misfit toys with Rudolph in the Rankin Bass special each Christmas season but even though I remembered the special pretty much verbatim after only a viewing or two that particular use of the word “independent” still didn’t register with me for a long time. That pretty much sums up my observations on the use of the word “independent” for the time being.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Parents who are in the middle of toilet training or whose kids have recently trained may find it helpful when they are out and about to stop at a Starbucks for some of their bathroom breaks away from home. I seem to remember the Starbucks app having a store finder feature. In addition this time of year they have snowman cookies at many store locations that most kids will probably enjoy. The above is mostly true of standalone Starbucks locations. If a specific Starbucks is in a store or hotel then all bets are off (as the expression goes). Most Starbucks at standalone locations that I have been to have a toilet that is a good height for most sizes and ages. Also the toilets flush manually and quietly compared to most public toilets which is a plus especially when someone has auditory sensitivities. The one downside though is that you may need to remember to ask a Starbucks employee for the bathroom code (for the combination lock on the door) that changes as often as daily. Therefore in an absolute emergency this might not always work. This is a better option for routine bathroom breaks. Other small coffee shops might work in this scenario in most urban locations on the off chance that a Starbucks is unavailable. These coffee shops can be located using certain apps like Apple Maps and Google Maps.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing!

[@thomasschoeck9080]

On the subject of constipation and regression: I heard a conversation yesterday when I was shopping at a pharmacy down the road from my apartment while I was walking to the self checkout. I had finished dinner a short time before and I walked to the pharmacy to pick up a gallon container of bottled water. I heard two story employees talking. One employee was talking about how her two-year-old toddler’s potty training was going. She mentioned that he was still going through some regression. The other employee asked her if his constipation cleared up yet. She indicated that it had. She thanked the other employee for her prune juice suggestion and told her that between that, a diaper, and about twenty minutes to a half hour in his favorite hiding place behind the couch he was able to take care of his constipation. I’m on the spectrum (currently level one but during childhood I was level two). When I was younger I would also get constipated during periods of regression and my mother would use the same (prune juice and diaper) technique referred to above with me. I didn’t have a hiding place myself so I would cuddle on mom’s lap and listen to a story, watch tv while sitting on her lap, or play with her hair in situations like that. My mother found that my constipation would virtually always resolve itself in this way during periods of regression. This approach had one significant upside and one significant downside as follows: The upside was that the immediate constipation issue would be resolved. The downside was that my bowel training (at home) was not essentially complete until around age five-and-a-half to six around the time that I finished preschool and started kindergarten. Even at almost age seven on a family road trip I was still not able to handle that part of my training just yet. In my case this was complicated by a fear of public restrooms caused by sensory sensitivities and the loud noise that toilets in public restrooms make compared to the toilet at home. My first accident-free vacation/long road trip was to Rockport, Massachusetts around age nine. Even then I would continue to have some ups and downs even at home for the next couple of years (especially when I was unusually stressed out or not in the best health. Sometimes something as mild as a cold could cause me to regress a bit for anywhere from a few days to a week.). It was only by middle school that I would no longer regress like this if I wasn’t feeling well for whatever reason (aside from becoming unusually teary-eyed, unusually clingy, and unusually emotional for my age). November 14, 2024 4:50 PM EST An addendum about not using too much prune juice: By the way I just read online that anyone younger than an adult should drink small amounts of prune juice diluted with water to relieve constipation. Healthline, webmd, or a physician can give more precise information on this.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your stories and insight!❤❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7AheadfamilyI just added an addendum to my comment above about not using too much prune juice when treating constipation.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7AheadfamilyThetoddlerlife web site indicates that in general four to six ounces of prune juice per day (120 to 180 milliliters) is in general safe for a toddler to drink.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just reading something online a short time ago about the connection between the sound of running water and related sounds (like the sound of putting gas in the car) and accidents. This is something that happens during (and for a while after) toilet training. It also happens when people get older and bladder control begins to weaken (starting as early as the mid-to-late forties or early fifties for some people). This means that even though Simon has been daytime trained since at least November accidents are still possible. For example, if Simon is not yet consistently verbalizing when he needs to go and you put gas in the car on a long shopping trip or after a picnic or a trip to the park a car seat wetting is possible (or even fairly likely) in that situation. Even if Simon doesn’t do this on a particular shopping trip, etc. in this situation Ezra might because he’s still very much in training at this point. If my experience is anything to go by accidents like this are quite common for at least a year after daytime training at home has been completed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for your insights!🩵💕🩵

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I probably would have finished my training more quickly if my parents worked on generalization with me. Instead I was only trained on the potty chair initially. Then the downstairs toilet at home. Next the downstairs and upstairs toilets. About a year later at age five-and-a-half I was able to at least sometimes use the toilets at preschool. By kindergarten at almost age six I was able to use the toilets mentioned above and the toilets at both of my grandparents houses (as well as the ones at the school where my kindergarten class was). Using other toilets was something that I needed to learn one toilet at a time until I started first grade (at almost age seven). By that point I was pretty much able to generalize at least when it comes to this area of my development.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was recently watching a video on Andrea Olson’s Elimination Communication KZbin channel (I forget which video) but in any event she mentioned some of the reasons that babies, toddlers, and sometimes even older kids will wet (or perhaps even soil) instead of using the toilet in no particular order as follows: 1. Babies, toddlers, and even older kids will rarely (if ever) hold it to the point of pain let alone loss of muscle control. This means that most wettings and soilings are technically voluntary whether in a diaper or clothes. Basically kids typically hold it until it gets more uncomfortable for them than they would like and then they let go. That being said most kids will cry, scream, potty dance, or give some other indication of their needs (often at least one or more minutes in advance) before they choose to let go. Therefore when they do it rarely if ever truly counts as misbehavior. This applies to neurotypical kids as well as those who are on the spectrum. When someone becomes verbal it is often easier to tell that someone needs to “go” before he or she does. 2. Wetting out of anger,spite, or as a manipulation tactic (while not unheard of) is actually quite rare. 3. Wetting will sometimes occur as a way to relieve stress. 4. Toddlers will sometimes wet when they are tired because it is easier than using the toilet. 5. Babies, toddlers, or even older kids can wet (or even soil) because they are bored and it gives them something to do. 6. Kids can get involved in an activity and not notice their need for a long time. 7. Wetting during sleep is usually automatic/involuntary. Soiling during sleep may be involuntary as well but opinions seem to vary somewhat on this. These considerations apply to “#1” and “#2”. I think she mentioned other reasons in addition but I forget what they are right now. In any case I listed these because they might explain some of the wettings, etc that Simon and Ezra have had over the years. I suspect that in Simon’s case he usually “goes” because he is tired or stressed out (or scared/nervous). Getting too involved in an activity can also be an issue. For Ezra “boredom wetting” and/or getting too involved in an activity when he’s not feeling bored are probably more significant factors.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!💙💙💙

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just talking to my mother on the phone a short time ago and the subject of early childhood memories and potty training came up. Specifically, the subject of potty training songs came up. When I was first learning it was the late 1970s and I would have been between three-and-a-half and four years old. They didn’t really have any potty training songs yet so my mother improvised. My mother is a musician (and she also sometimes writes music (but not professionally)) and she enjoys both classical music and opera. Back when I was training her interest in opera music was stronger. In any case I mentioned to her that one song I remember had lyrics along the lines of “Torea Dora don’t wet on the floor a use your potty that what it’s for a.” Sometimes she would add the word “please” between don’t and wet and sometimes there were other variations (including additional verses that I now no longer remember.) My memory is pretty good but not quite photographic. The bottom line is that if you are working on training Ezra and he starts losing interest and existing potty training songs don’t work you might get some results by making up your own songs to a melody that he already enjoys listening to. This idea came to me maybe an hour ago when my mother joked (in the course of this evening’s conversation) that maybe I started using the potty chair so she would stop singing. In my case the potty training song didn’t really do much of anything but who knows it might work for Ezra if he likes music and understands what you want him to do.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!💕💕💕

[@thomasschoeck9080]

On the subject of regression: This can be caused by a number of factors including (but not limited to) fear of the toilet or the flushing sound and jealousy about a sibling receiving more attention. Either way some early indicators are hiding under a table or behind a chair (for example) five to fifteen minutes after eating (or forty-five minutes to an hour after drinking fluids) at a new preschool, a new daycare, or one that a child has not been to since the beginning of Summer. Leaning against a table or counter and bending the knees shortly after eating can also be an indicator. If a parent or other caretaker takes the child to the restroom after noticing these signs it is often possible to get the child to finish there. In the event that this occurs (even at age four or five, for example (or even older)) don’t worry. It doesn’t mean that the child is no longer trained and it doesn’t mean that you need to start over. If one catches this quickly it’s possible to get the child back on track within a couple weeks to a month once the causes of the regression have been addressed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing with us!💕💕

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just reviewing software defined networking and virtualization (including network virtualization) and one concept that came up over and over again was the concept of a container. The simple explanation is that a container is like a virtual machine but more lightweight. A virtual machine is (essentially) a computer within a computer. It is a program (such a virtualbox , VMware, or Parallels) that makes it possible to run one operating system on top of another operating system. For example if you needed to run MacOS and Windows on a Macintosh at the same time (for application compatibility reasons, for instance) a virtual machine would allow you to do that. Now back to the concept of containers. In an IT (Information Technology) context a container contains an application that needs to run and just enough of the operating system to run that one application (or perhaps in some instances a small group of applications). Now onto the concept of containers more generally and how I learned about them in everyday life. I first learned the word “container” and a few examples of it on a family vacation to Nantucket, Massachusetts when I was somewhere around three-and-a-half years old (give or take). At this point I was not yet toilet trained. In fact I had not even used the potty chair for the first time even though I had been introduced to it some time in the eighteen to twenty-four month range. I think by age two or two-and-a-half to at least three I knew the phrase “potty chair” but I didn’t know what it was for let alone how to use it. It was only after the trip to Nantucket that my mother was able to teach me the concept of what “peeing” was. Basically she would hold me on her lap (fully clothed, but without a diaper on) with the TV on (or when reading me a story) and she would make sure that I was well-hydrated. At some point my bladder would empty and she would sometimes essentially say “Look, Tommy you’re going pee-pee! Can you say pee-pee?” (Without any commentary or judgment). After a while (maybe a week or two?) I learned to repeat that. After that she would continue on with this but now whenever I went (or whenever it seemed like I needed to go) she would say something like “Go pee-pee Tommy! Go pee-pee!”. After a while of this training on her lap (maybe an additional week or two (for a total of two weeks to a month of practice)) she had me sit on the potty chair to practice. I think she could tell that I was still confused about what the potty chair was for because she told me to sit on it and then she explained that it was a container for holding my pee (which she explained means “pee-pee”) that I could use instead of her lap or a Pamper. After her explanation she said essentially “Go pee-pee Tommy, Go pee-pee!” and then completely by accident (I would later learn (in college Freshman year in the mid-1990s) that it was by conditioned reflex (sort of like Pavlov’s dogs)) I did. I still didn’t know how to use it voluntarily yet (that would come later) but at least I knew what it was for. After I turned four my mother had to do exactly the same process with me again to transition me from the potty chair (which was thrown away on my fourth birthday because I was now “too old for it”) and to teach me the mechanics of the bowel portion of my training. This included learning words and phrases like “poo-poo” and “Go poo-poo!” and “push/pushing”. This probably took me up to another month. After that I was ready to try it on the toilet instead of her lap. At this point it was explained to me that the big toilet was a container for holding my pees and poops (and an explanation of what that meant in terms of words that I already knew). Then it wouldn’t be long before I started using the big toilet voluntarily but I was still very much in training (even at home) for another year-and-a-half or so. Generalization (and learning to flush every time , always wash and dry my hands, etc.) would take quite a while after that. The bottom line is that I am on the spectrum (level one now, but I was level two when I was younger) and I had to be trained in the most concrete and step-by-step way possible to get there. For Ezra to learn what either a potty chair in his size or the big toilet is for he may need to learn other concepts (such as the concepts of “peeing”, “pooping”, “pushing”, and “containers” and some other concepts as well). Simon is fully toilet trained during the day but in order to understand what a portable urinal is for he might need to learn the concept of a container in a more general sense before he understands what to do with it. Until he reaches that point daytime wetting accidents are still possible (and even likely) in traffic jams or in any other situation where a rest room may not be readily available when it is needed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I am currently studying for a computer networking exam that I hope to take within the next week or so and I think I am almost ready because almost everything I am reading about reminds me of computer networking. For example, I was reading about potty training on a web site last night (I don’t remember which one) when I was having difficulty sleeping and despite being very tired I started relating it to the concept of AAA in Enterprise Networking as it relates to logging in to an enterprise wireless access point (in this instance). AAA is an acronym that will be explained below. This relates to logging in to a network and permissions that one has after logging in. The first A is authentication. It is essentially the “Who are you?” question. At this point a device sends login credentials to a wireless access point (for example). The device (such as a pc,laptop,or tablet) is called the supplicant. The wireless access point is called the Authenticator ( for some reason) even though the actual authentication is delegated to the authentication server that the enterprise access point is connected to. The second A is authorization. If the authentication server decides that the login credentials are correct a message is sent to the access point to allow the supplicant to connect to it and access the network. The third A is accounting. This is the “What did you do?” question. In this instance the server keeps records of what the device did while it was connected to a network (If this has been configured). Being able to understand those three questions (or ones like them) is an important thing when one is toilet training. For example, the “Who are you?”question or “Am I the one being spoken to?” question in this instance is important to understand. I read in a blog some time back about a family who was on the road with their (presumably neurotypical) roughly three-year-old toddler son (or even up to three months older than that) who was maybe three months into his toilet training. They got stuck in traffic he needed to “go” and in a moment of exasperation/annoyance the mother yelled to the cars in front of her “Just go!”. The kid misunderstood and thought she was talking to him. Luckily he was wearing a pair of disposable training pants so no harm done. Mistakes like this are quite common with both neurotypical and autistic kids when they are new to toilet training. Regarding the “What am I allowed to do?” question this also relates to toilet training. Many times when I was learning I would be sitting in my car seat and think I had permission to “go”. This would sometimes happen until I was as old as five-and-half or so. For example, I would sometimes mention to my mother that I needed to go and if it was an inconvenient time my mother would say something like “That’s just great!” Or “Fantastic!” and I would let go thinking that I had permission. This happened because being on the spectrum I didn’t understand sarcasm yet. If Simon was still dry for a short time on the shopping trip where you went to Dollar Tree when he said “Oh no, Potty!” it is possible (even likely) that if you said something like “Great!” Or “Fantastic!” he might have thought that you were giving him permission to wet in his car seat. That would explain why he didn’t really seem to be sad or embarrassed at the end of that video. If he thought you gave him the go ahead then in his mind he would have still had a successful potty break (as opposed to a potty accident/potty failure) even though he was wet instead of dry that time. Regarding the “What did you do?” question Simon started training soon after he was able to answer that question. For example Simon was first able to answer that question with some prompting after his first day of preschool. Later on, during the day of the doctor visit he was able to tell you what he did without prompting. Shortly after this he trained fairly quickly during the day aside from maybe a regression or two here and there.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just looking at a new video on Andrea Olson’s KZbin channel about Elimination Communication and she showed how a product works that covers up the automatic flush sensor on public toilets. This could be useful for Ezra if you are working on his toilet training when you are out of the house if he is still afraid of the automatic flush. It could also be useful if Simon starts to regress a bit off and on and his fear of the automatic flush returns. According to the video description on her channel the product is called FlushHush.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for your insight!❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding timing my parents probably started training me too early. They bought the potty chair around eighteen months and (by their own admission) occasionally put me on it at random. They only started training me full time when my doctor said that all children are ready to toilet train on their second birthday. This was probably what doctors were told back in the mid-to-late 1970s. This checkup was just after that and I actually remember hearing the doctor say it. As it turns out I was not ready to even begin training for over another year. This was probably a combination of being born prematurely (and the complications from that) and the developmental conditions (likely at least partly genetic) that I needed to deal with that my doctors had either not noticed or didn’t think were significant.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@7Aheadfamily]

That’s too bad that the doctors said that all kids are ready by 2 Years old. That puts a lot of stress on the parent.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7Aheadfamily Also even back then (in the late 1970s) some parents attempted to get their kids into preschool at age three,kindergarten at age four, first grade at age five (which seems a bit fast even for most neurotypical children). My parents initially had this as a goal for me. They realized that wasn’t achievable when I was three-and-half (give or take) and just beginning to use the potty chair. At this point their next goal was to get me into preschool somewhere in my fourth year, kindergarten just before five,and first grade just before six. As a result I was taken to a class at one of the schools in the area to see where I was in terms of social interaction. This was shortly after I turned four. This was after my parents threw away my potty chair but before I was using the big toilet. Therefore by this point in time I had gone from being trained for not more than six months to being completely untrained again. This would play a role in what happened later that day. In any case I remember finger painting and getting enough paint on my hands to be bothered by it. At that point I walked up to the drinking fountain and used it to wash my hands. Years later when watching the movie Witness with Harrison Ford in it my sister would see the scene where the boy who was the witness later on washed his hands in the drinking fountain. At that point she laughed and asked my parents who were watching the movie with us if the boy in the movie was autistic and she mentioned the time I washed my hands in the drinking fountain at age four. At that point my parents said “No, honey (or possibly sweetie) he’s not and only one doctor thought your brother was.” That doctor was the one who performed the neurological exam and autism evaluation. In any case after I washed my hands in the drinking fountain I had some juice and a small snack. A short time later I had to “go”. A few moments later I found an area in the middle of the floor where no one was playing and sat down. At that point I looked down and tightened my stomach. You can probably figure out what happened next. After that I stood up, walked around the room for a while and noticed a group of at least four kids playing. I walked up to them and one kid in the group noticed that my shorts were wet. At that point one of the kids said “You’re wet, are you a baby?”. Then when I tried to get closer and another kid in the group said “Go away pee-pee head!” and pushed me as hard as possible. At that point I fell down and started crying. Shortly after my mother came to pick me up. At that point it was determined that my preschool enrollment would need to wait another year. I remember my father was not happy to learn this and he told my mother that it was her fault that I wasn’t ready for preschool because she was babying me too much. Specifically he criticized the fact that she allowed me to sit on her lap and play with her hair and sniff it whenever I was nervous or upset. He then pointed out that his mother never did that with him and that he grew up more quickly. This was back in the late 1970s when some people (including a few doctors) still believed environmental explanations for autism rather than the correct biological ones. Some years later I asked my parents why they thought I was ready for preschool at that point if I still wasn’t using the big toilet yet. My mother told me that she thought that peer pressure and watching the other kids would motivate me to start using the big toilet like they did. Needless to say that didn’t happen yet. I only started doing that (on occasion) outside the house about a year-and-half later in preschool at age five-and-half. After that summer at nearly age six I started kindergarten and then first grade the following year but that’s a whole other story. By the way back in 1977 (when I was first diagnosed at age two shortly after my two-year checkup) autism diagnosis was a shorter process lasting maybe up to an hour. I remember assembling some very basic jigsaw puzzles (and the like) and (at least in the Boston area) they were already doing the part of the test where the child plays with a toy and the person doing the test tries to move the toy or take it away and check to see if any eye contact is made. I did not make any eye contact and instead cried when the toy car made almost entirely of wood was taken away. I still remember the doctor explaining the diagnosis to my parents (and them being handed a Manila file folder with some papers in it) and their response was something along the lines of “You don’t know what you’re talking about! What do you expect he’s two!”. I could go into more detail but this should get the basic idea across. For now this pretty much sums up my observations on this topic.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@SierraSierra-h8v]

Do you recommend a specific potty training book. When did you begin the process of potty training for Simon?

[@7Aheadfamily]

It took about two months to potty train Simon. We didn’t really go by one potty training book. But we did create a PDF that is free. www.7-ahead.com/pottytraining

[@thomasschoeck9080]

A step stool and training seat with a step ladder would have been a good thing for my parents to have back when I was training in the late 1970s and into the early 1980s. If these were available back then I might have trained months or even a year or so more quickly than I did.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Yes! They are very nice. 😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good to hear that Ezra’s urine training seems to be pretty much complete. It looks like you went with the urine training first method with Ezra like what my mother did with me back in the late 1970s (back when I was three-and-a-half to four years old). My bowel training started at age four shortly after my parents decided that I was too old for the potty chair and threw it away. Now it’s time to get him bowel trained. If Ezra is struggling with the mechanics of having a bowel movement sitting down (or if he’s too nervous to do this on the toilet right now) you may need to have him practice this initially in other locations where he is more comfortable doing this than sitting on the toilet. Places where you can have him practice initially are in his high chair, in the car, or on your lap (e.g. on walks around the neighborhood). In order to keep things relatively clean you will want to put a diaper on him for this. Pull-on style diapers don’t work well for this (due to not having the best leak guards) so you will need to use the ones with Velcro fasteners(some vendors use the term “hook and loop” instead) or tape-on-style diapers for this. In the event that he doesn’t “go” right away you might be able to save money on diapers by looking for a product with tapes that can be refastened so you can try again later without wasting a clean diaper. Also to keep his clothes clean you will want to use a product with tall standing leak guards in his size. To determine the correct product size you will need to weigh him and measure his waist size. Sometimes correct product selection might require some additional measurements. The website for whichever product you are considering should have some details on this. If you are having him practice on your lap on walks around the neighborhood you may want to give him a snack to help things along. At this point you can have him push his feet against a large rock, a tree stump, or even your hands. If he still won’t poop in his diaper at this point you may need to give him verbal permission (and perhaps a small reward of some kind) to get him to “go”. If he does “go” he will probably also wet his diaper while doing this. Don’t worry about it, it won’t set his urine training back all that much. To keep his urine training on track during this process as much as possible you will want to put him right back into underwear after you clean him up. If your goal is to try for bowel training in a month or just over a month, you could do what I describe for two weeks. After the two weeks you can do essentially the same thing but have him “go” on the toilet with his diaper on at a time of day when he usually has a movement. Just like before you clean him up afterward and put him right back into underwear to keep his urine training as on track as possible. After the one month is over you then have him sit on the toilet without a diaper on in order to practice using the toilet the conventional way. After my urine training was completed this was fairly close to what my mother did to get me bowel trained. I took longer than this to get there but in my case I was dealing with level two autism (I’m level one now), mild cerebral palsy, and the effects of a right hemisphere stroke at birth. As far as I know Ezra is only dealing with autism so you may see results in as little as a month or so (with any luck). Given that he’s level three you may need to have him practice on the toilet without a diaper on for an extra month or two before he completely masters it. This process is one of the rare instances in which diapers can actually be used successfully as a toilet training tool. If Ezra has already outgrown the tape-on diapers in his size you can probably find something suitable in a medical supply store. If not then you can do some web searches for incontinence web sites. In this fashion you will likely find what you need in his size in the quantity that you would need. If there are any extras left over they could come in handy for long road trips, traffic jams, and certain other unusual situations where a rest room might not be readily available when one is needed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your insight!🩵🩵🩵

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding shadows (especially moving shadows) distractions and accidents: I was talking to my mother on the phone a few days ago about some of the things that I remember from when I was toilet training and the subject of often not being able to pull myself away from an activity when I needed to “go” came up. I mentioned on the phone call to my mother that I remember some times when I was distracted by shadows on the floor when I needed to “go” and ended up having an accident. My mother confirmed that my recollection of being in the four to five-and-a-half age range when this happened was correct. One time in that age range I was playing with some toys in my sister’s room and I felt my bladder fill up. This wasn’t the experience of the feeling coming on gradually it was the sudden experience of going from nothing to having to go very soon (if not immediately). Normally I would have walked down the stairs to the downstairs bathroom at that point and I usually would have made it. There was an upstairs bathroom maybe ten feet away but my training was not yet generalized enough for me to be able to use that one just yet. In any event there were shadows on the floor from the tree outside of the back window. The wind blew through the branches and I started looking at the shadows and couldn’t pull myself away from them(especially now that they were moving). Pulling myself away from a shadow that was not moving was difficult enough (but I could sometimes do it even at that age especially if someone was there to help redirect my attention). After a while my bladder finally started to empty. Just as I was finishing up with that my sister came in to her room and saw what was happening and said over and over “You’re going to get in trouble! You’re going to get in trouble!” in that sing-song way that kids in the seven-to-nine age range often do. My sister is level one (I was still level two at that point (level one now)) but she was able to pass for neurotypical well enough (including avoiding the “monotone voice” stereotype by learning how to modulate her voice) that even at that age most people wouldn’t recognize that she has autism (she was only diagnosed by about age thirteen or fourteen). Needless to say after my sister walked down the stairs and told my mother about what happened and they both came up the stairs I was not in trouble because my mother already knew that I was on the spectrum (this was discovered during a neurological exam shortly after my two year checkup) plus I was still just learning. Even with Simon being level one it is possible (even likely) that he could occasionally have accidents while playing similar to what I described above (especially with him being trained so recently (within about the last five months at the most)). My mother was able to reduce the frequency of such accidents in the future by pulling the shades down in the room to eliminate most of the moving shadows and using light bulbs instead of natural light to illuminate the room instead. I am guessing that my sister eventually remembered that I was looking at the moving shadows when I was having my wetting accident and told my mother about this later on. You can try what I suggest above if you notice Simon starting to have more accidents (of any type) while playing indoors in situations like this. Similar situations/scenarios might also account for some of Ezra’s accidents with him being much earlier in the toilet training process (as I recall).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for your insight❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Underpants with designs on them are definitely a good idea. When I was training my parents did not think of this and they bought me plain white underwear. Due to being on the spectrum and some other developmental conditions I confused these underpants with diapers for quite some time because to me they looked and felt a lot like diapers. I think I only really started training in a significant way when I had a combination of underpants with colors other than white that I could choose from and underpants with designs on them. Back when I was growing up they had underoos (or however they spelled it).

[@7Aheadfamily]

That’s a great point, some thing I would have never thought of. Thank you for sharing that again ❤️. Many people will benefit from your comments ❤️.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

A timer probably would have helped me when I was first learning. From what I can recall parents weren’t really doing this back in the late 1970s and early 1980s.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Yeah, timers probably weren’t as easily accessible then either.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7Aheadfamily I think they had three minute egg timers with sand in them back then but if anyone used these for toilet training I have never heard about it.

[@7Aheadfamily]

🤣

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I just randomly remembered a few moments ago that when I was growing up (starting around Simon’s current age) that one thing that would often cause me to have wetting accidents (and sometimes even the other kind) was losing my balance and falling down. This would be even more likely if I ended skinning my left elbow, my left knee, or both. The right side of the brain is connected to the left side of the body (generally speaking, but the specific details are somewhat complicated). Given the damage to my right hemisphere from a stroke at birth this would often trigger sensory meltdowns that would sometimes lead to a wetting accident, a mess, or both. In my case this was definitely not just a result of getting distracted by the pain of a skinned elbow or a skinned knee. From what I remember skinning my right elbow or my right knee would virtually never have this effect. Therefore while being on the spectrum causes me to sometimes experience sensory overload in general the right side of my brain is more vulnerable to this than my left. This wasn’t just a result of being young either. One time when I was home during the college years (some time in my late teens or early twenties) I sprained my left ankle in my parent’s backyard and I started crying and my bladder started to empty. Fortunately I noticed this and I managed to stop the flow after maybe five seconds or so. The bottom line is that this is (I suspect) a symptom of right hemisphere damage that other people probably have also. I have yet to see anything in the literature on this topic, though. I’m guessing that this isn’t just something that I experienced. If you notice that Simon is more likely to have accidents (of either type) when he experiences pain on the left side that could indicate that he has damage and/or underdevelopment of his right hemisphere in addition to being on the spectrum. If he does turn out to have this a neurologist could suggest any additional steps that should be taken from here. Most likely he would have speech therapy and social skills training just like he has now. In addition they would probably add on physical and occupational therapies to improve right hemisphere development (which might provide some additional improvement in the understanding of body language and social skills). While doing this they will want to make sure that his speech and social skills continue to progress. For all I know (at the other extreme) overdevelopment of the right hemisphere might negatively affect speech so that is also something to be on the lookout for. You might need to go over some additional vocabulary with Simon (but without causing him too much stress) if his speech seems to regress a bit over the next couple of years. For the moment this pretty much sums up my thoughts and recollections on this specific topic.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for commenting😊😊😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding potty training and potty regression: I just remembered that one thing my mother did with me during periods of potty regression was to have me wear long pants and tuck the pants legs inside my socks. This worked well because I don’t like having wet feet. This is not something that worked immediately by any stretch. It still took me two to four weeks on average to get completely back on track any time that I regressed, but it’s still something to keep in mind if you happen to see any potty training regression with Ezra and/or Simon over the course of the Summer. Summer vacation is less structured than the school year so it could happen.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for your insight!❤❤❤

[@7Aheadfamily]

We appreciate you!😊😊😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding travel and regression: I watched your most recent video about the ski trip. It looks like on the ski trip there were at least two places where restrooms would have been available. Even so, the restroom situation would be less than ideal and some amount of accidents (and even perhaps some regressions) would be fairly normal. With Ezra being so new to toilet training you would probably see more regression with Ezra in this area than you would with Simon. Even so, Simon has only been trained since about October or November of 2023 so some level of toileting regression is still possible in situations like this. I have mentioned in past comments that in my own experience I would have accidents (and even some regression) on family vacations until I was at least six years old, almost seven. By today’s standards I was level two back then (I’m currently level one). After each vacation my toilet training would (at least typically) be back on track after no more than a month. My mother basically helped me with this after every vacation by using what is usually called the “pants and puddles method” today. It is pretty much what it sounds like. Basically I would not have a diaper on during the day no matter how many accidents I had. Shopping trips (e.g. to the grocery store) in this situation would be handled by having me wear a pair of shorts made of a thin material that liquid could easily flow through and then I would be sitting in the seat in the shopping cart on a folded bath towel, a beach towel, or even a picnic blanket with something plastic underneath like an old crib liner or a garage bag (for example) to absorb anything that might need to be absorbed. If my mother noticed an accident happening she would simply point out that I was peeing (or whatever I happened to be doing) without commentary, without judgement, and without punishment. The goal here was to improve awareness of what my body was doing so I could start to get my control back on track. During these (typically) one month periods I would usually be playing outside (weather permitting) or indoors in a room with a tile or linoleum floor so that any accidents that occurred would be easy to clean up. My mother would also watch me for “potty dances” or other indicators of having to go and take me to the toilet and encourage me to go there as much as I was able to in order to encourage as much daytime toilet usage as possible even during these regressions. In fashion I would typically get back on track fairly quickly (usually within a month at the most).

[@7Aheadfamily]

We just wanted to say thank you so much for sharing such useful information and ideas to us!💜We really appreciate it!💕

[@thomasschoeck9080]

If you have seen the Rugrats episode “Chuckie vs the Potty” Chuckie mentioned that the things that he tried to do instead of using the potty included pooping in his room and hiding it in his toy box, putting napkins in his pants and using them like a diaper, and trying to stop pooping altogether. It sounds like Simon at least didn’t do the first two of these but he did do the third. I have read in books, articles, and blogs that many kids (including some neurotypical ones) get confused for a while during toilet training and think that they are not supposed to poop at all so they just hold it and become constipated. Maybe that’s what happened to Simon in the part of the video about regression. I don’t remember doing this myself when I was younger, but who knows, I might have.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️

[@7Aheadfamily]

I remember that tv show and that particular episode too

[@thomasschoeck9080]

If you want to work specifically on the standing up portion of urine training with Ezra you could have him use the bathtub instead of the toilet for this portion of his training. This could allow him to make the transition to using urinals in public restrooms (or at school) much more easily. My parents did not do this with me but I have read on some miscellaneous sites around the internet that some people have had some success with this when absolutely nothing else has worked. Also a friend of mine managed to get one of her grandsons just toilet trained enough for school in this fashion. He is in first grade now and most of the time he seems to manage well enough toilet-training wise. In addition if he is given a large breakfast early enough in the morning he will generally poop in his diaper in a timely enough fashion to be changed before he needs to go to school. Therefore his lack of bowel training is not actually a deal-breaker when it comes to him going to school (at least at his current grade level). He does still need to wear an Easy-Up, Goodnite or Ninjamas to school just in case. On the plus side he’s able to change himself if he’s only wet so in practice his incomplete toilet training is currently not as much of an issue as one might expect. If all else fails (or if you need to work with a very short deadline for some reason (such as possible enrollment in a new school)) maybe this could be enough to get Ezra to the point of being well-enough-trained for current purposes until he eventually completes his toilet training at a later date.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

What my mother did to keep me busy on the potty chair was to read me some children’s books (fairy tales and nursery rhymes mostly) and she sang songs to me like Itsy Bitsy Spider.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Sounds like you had a very awesome mom. 😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just talking to my parents and my sister this evening and I was mentioning my memories of a family trip to Old Saybrook Connecticut in a cottage belonging to a friend of the family when I was very young. I mentioned that I must have been very young at the time because I remembered that one of my uncles bought his pickup truck shortly before that trip. My sister confirmed that this was in the Summer of 1980 but she couldn’t give an exact date because she wouldn’t start remembering specific dates and times for any new events for about another couple of years. Apparently her memory for dates developed over time. In the summer of 1980 I was about four-and-three quarters years old. I was mostly daytime trained at home but my training had not yet become generalized. That would only begin to happen about nine months later when I was in preschool. My parents and sister knew that I remembered this trip because I mentioned that the laundromat that we went to on that trip was the first time that I saw coin-operated washers and dryers. I even mentioned that I remembered that the reason there was so much laundry was because they were trying to generalize my toilet training at the cottage that we were staying at and it wasn’t working at all. If anything I was regressing a bit. Before that I would at least do a potty dance if I needed to go but on that trip I wasn’t even doing that. I am mentioning all of this because I was level two at that age and at the time of diagnosis Simon was level two on his social communication (or something like that, from what I remember from that video). This means that if you go on any trips to beaches or the like over the course of this Summer Simon can and probably will regress a bit in his toilet training (even though he is daytime trained right now, and has been for probably at least four months by now). Therefore on a trip like this you will probably want to have Simon use the restroom before getting ready to swim (if possible) and then put a Little Swimmers, Splashers, or other swim diaper on him just in case. They will probably still fit him at that age but you will want to check the Pampers and Huggies web sites for the weight limits on these products to make sure they will be workable. If they are not products both cloth and disposable exist for all sizes (including adult sizes). These are mostly available from various companies online. Also you will want to reinforce toilet usage as much as possible (even if you might need to temporarily go back to a reward system during the trip). Also (if at all possible) you will want to keep these trips to the first half of Summer just in case Simon and/or Ezra’s toilet training slides a bit and a certain amount of retraining is needed before the next school year begins in the Fall. This is important because my sister and I both had some level of Summer regression during preschool, kindergarten, and at least most of the grade school years. I have also seen in a number of online videos that Summer Regression (of varying degrees) is quite common at all autism levels. For example I think autism family made a reference or two to it in some of their videos (at least regarding speech and social skills), but currently I don’t remember much beyond that.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for your insight!❤️😊❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

On the subject of being uncomfortable when wet if you decide to have Simon wear a diaper when he sees Santa (preferably in the evening close to bedtime) you will want to make sure that it is not something too absorbent like a Pamper or a Huggies. If you have ever seen the movie a Christmas Story you may remember that a kid who looked be around Simon’s age (give or take) was implied to have had an accident just before Ralphie sat down. When Ralphie was growing up disposable diapers would not have been invented yet, so what happened in that instance cannot be blamed on disposables. The bottom line is that accidents on Santa’s lap are quite common at Simon’s age (even for neurotypical children who have been trained for a while). Therefore you will probably want to have Simon wear a diaper this time around when he sees Santa. To minimize the effects of this on his daytime training you will want to have him see Santa in the evening in his pajamas with his nighttime diaper on. That way even if he “goes” one or even both ways it shouldn’t be enough of a departure from his usual nighttime routine to set him back all that much (if at all) in his daytime toilet training. If you ever tried the name brand products mentioned above with Simon you may have found them to be too dry (at least after the first bladder void). I don’t have any kids and haven’t used Pampers or Huggies myself since the 1980s but I have read in some online reviews that the main issue with these name brand product for kids who are still training (or are very recently trained like Simon is) is that they work too well and kids might lose some of their toilet training if these products are overused. You will also want to remind Simon that the diaper is just there for accidents. If he has an accident (or even appears to have an “on purpose”) of either or both kinds in this situation don’t punish him. After all even kids as old as Ralphie in A Christmas Story can be afraid of Santa sometimes. Instead tell him that if he stays clean and dry until he gets home he can have a special snack or dessert. This should give him a good incentive to not use the diaper unless he actually needs to.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. We didn’t do Santa this year. It’s not a big tradition in our house.

[@AlyviaGranillo]

My 5 year old son has autism and is currently struggling to use restrooms at school, he never really liked public restrooms due to loud noises and sensory issues so it feels like we’re starting all over again but in school now 😢 headphones and safety item are not helping much unfortunately, but I won’t give up ❤

[@7Aheadfamily]

Yes, that can be one of the most difficult things for sure! We are here for you! You will get there eventually. :)

[@amberwilliams2856]

Hi I have a question for you. What frequency of taking him to the potty did you start with.

[@7Aheadfamily]

We took him probably about once an hour until he got used to it and started going on his own.

[@amberwilliams2856]

@@7Aheadfamily Thanks

[@7Aheadfamily]

Of course❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Yesterday I was in an ice cream shop and a kid who looked like he was about Simon’s age said to his father “I have to go potty!”. His father showed him where the bathroom is and he made it. A short time later when they ordered the ice cream they added some extra toppings as a reward for letting them know that he needed to “go” and making it. The parents mentioned that it was only about his third or fourth time using a toilet outside the house. It probably worked out this well because many small shops and small restaurants tend to have toilets without the automatic flush (and with the toilet tank) that are more like what people usually have at home. I don’t actually know if the kid that I saw yesterday is on the spectrum (I didn’t ask.). I did see some repetitive hand movements with him that might be stims but it’s also possible that he’s younger than he looks. The ideas above might be useful for working on Ezra’s training when you are outside the house.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing!💕💕 It is great insight!🩵🩵

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just asking Microsoft Copilot about ways in which a toddler who is three years old (for example) might try to get a bath if he isn’t yet able to ask for one. One of the possibilities that is listed is making a mess with food, paint, or dirt. Based on where Ezra’s communication skills are right now I wonder if that might explain some of the things that Ezra does. Maybe if you add an option for “bath” to his communication app you will begin to see a decrease in mess making of all kinds and his potty training might improve as well. I also wonder if some of Simon’s accidents as recently as about a year ago (even after he started using some sentences here and there) might have been a result of wanting to take a bath but not being able to ask for one yet. I asked Copilot questions about things that a toddler who isn’t yet able to ask for a bath might do because I was recently talking to my mother on the phone and I mentioned that a kindergarten-age kid in my neighborhood who is level two will sometimes use his car seat instead of the toilet (even as soon as right after he has been strapped in) and my mother suggested that maybe he’s doing this because he likes baths but can’t ask for them yet. Copilot also seems to recognize this as a possibility for kids who are struggling with communication in that type of situation (even if it’s currently somewhere between the twentieth and fortieth item down on its list).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I just remembered this morning after having a serving of two squares of dark chocolate and a couple of granola bars that sometimes after emptying the bladder it is necessary a short time later to do a movement. Sometimes this can happen after standing up and taking a few steps. This happened with me most often when I was younger (for example during training). From what I remember this would happen with me most often on days when my reflux acted up. For someone in training this can manifest itself as follows. First the bladder is emptied and the toilet is flushed. Later on (often during or shortly after handwashing) the person in training will pause for a few moments and possibly bend the knees. If the parent notices what is beginning to happen it is sometimes possible to get the person in training to finish on the toilet. Sometimes this works, and sometimes it doesn’t. It might depend on whether the person in training is having a good day or a bad day. Even though I was trained enough for kindergarten by just before age six this is something that I would still struggle with quite a bit until I was between six-and-three quarters and seven years old. I probably continued to have good days and bad days with this because I was still level two at that point (I’m currently level one). For someone who is level three this can occur until around age nine (or sometimes even a bit longer). Even on a bad day, though, such events can be used as an opportunity to learn about the cleanup process and how to assist with that in a manner that one is developmentally ready for. For example, from what I remember I was able to assist in the cleanup process after such mishaps by about age six. By age seven mishaps of that kind started to become less common. By age nine they were quite rare (usually only occurring if I was sick, unusually tired, or under an unusual amount of stress). I figured these observations would be relevant for anyone reading this who is in the process of training someone and is part of the way there, but not all the way there.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!💕

[@Aileen53]

Potty training is hard! You got this tho😊

[@7Aheadfamily]

Agreed! Thank you ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Andrea Olson (I mis-spelled her last name in some earlier comments) has a video about “Getting Baby to Signal” on her KZbin channel. Some of the other videos (or podcast episodes) that she mentioned in that video might also be potentially relevant for someone around Ezra’s toilet training level (or perhaps even earlier in the training process). Some of her tips in that video might also help with getting him to sign in general (even for things like being hungry or tired, or asking for certain specific food items). Even though Ezra is eight years old (he’s not a baby or toddler anymore) some of the techniques in that video might still be useful for him. I was just reading on a web site earlier today (I forget which one) that elimination communication techniques can work on kids with special needs (all the way up to at least age ten years) when other methods have not worked. This can be true whether someone has Down’s Syndrome, severe (level three) autism, or even some other conditions not listed here that might result in traditional toilet training methods not working at the expected time (if at all).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank your insight❤️

[@MC-sw3tw]

I have twins who are 5 now has autism one girl who is none verbal and a boy who has autism talk sometimes and I am having a time potty training till this day. Thanks will try your video

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for watching!🩷🩷 Hope our videos helps you!🩵🩵

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Here is an example of a mistake that my mother sometimes made when I was being toilet trained but I was a bit older (toward the end of my toilet training): Starting when I was around Simon’s current age (and continuing until just before kindergarten (at nearly age six)) during walks around the neighborhood or while playing in the backyard I was more or less expected to try to wait to get to the toilet without being reminded. Sometimes I would remember to do this but even on a good day I was maybe 50 percent on this (based on what I remember and what other people in my family remember about this). In the playtime scenario I would get involved in playing with a toy car (for example) or something similar like a toy truck and while this was happening I would often “go” (in either or both fashions) without noticing it. I noticed that Simon got at least one gift along these lines on his birthday this year. Therefore if he gets involved enough in his play this could (at least theoretically) happen while he is playing (even though he’s been trained during the day for a number of months now). With Ezra still being in the middle of toilet training this is even more likely to happen with him. In the walk around the neighborhood scenario I would sometimes get uncomfortable and stop walking without really understanding why I was uncomfortable. At this point I would often instinctively spread my legs, bend my knees, squat (or even do all of these). Then my body would automatically take care of whatever it needed to while I was consciously doing something else like looking up at the color of the sky, a passing cloud, or something else in the distance. From what I have been told by other family members it looked to them like I was doing this deliberately even though I actually didn’t realize what was happening (it was still often completely instinctive at this point). During both of the scenarios above I was no longer wearing Pampers during the day except on long car rides, during some longer shopping trips (that were longer than a quick trip to the grocery store to grab a few things), and at preschool because I was only sometimes able to use an unfamiliar bathroom even at that point. The mistake my mother would make at this point (when I was wearing underwear and she noticed that an accident was in progress) is that instead of saying something like, “Look, Tommy you’re going pee-pee (or poo-poo) can you say pee-pee (or poo-poo)?” like she did when I was slightly younger she would instead ask the much more vague question of “Is someone (or somebody) going pee-pee (or poo-poo)?” At this point I virtually always either said nothing or (very rarely) give the wrong answer (which at the time my mother interpreted as my first lies (even though I would actually only start understanding the concept of lying at age seven-and-a-half when I was in first grade (and understand it better the following year in second grade)). As it turned out I was actually at least nine years old (if not ten) before I was able to tell my first (very unconvincing) lies). I guess either a doctor or nurse or someone in my family must have told my mother that her question to me was too vague because she eventually went back to using the older more detailed questions (and pointing to the puddle on the ground that was forming when this occurred) and my toilet training soon started to get back on track. On a related note if Simon starts to have some accidents (of either or both types) again (which would be pretty common at his age (even some neurotypical four-year-olds (and a smaller number of neurotypical five-year-olds) do this for a while)) it doesn’t need to be a completely negative experience for him. You could use the experience to work on vocabulary words with him (such as “puddle”, “wet”, “dirty”, “stinky”,”smelly”,”yellow”,”brown”, “warm”, “cold”, “itchy”, “accident”, or other words that tie in with the event). For example, if Simon doesn’t know the word “puddle” yet you could point out that he’s peeing (as I describe above) without any judgment or negative commentary and then wait for him to finish up with that. After he finishes “going” and is able to focus on something else you can then point to the puddle and say (without commentary or judgment) “Look, Simon you made a puddle can you say puddle?”. If the accident is an avoidable one you will want to remind him (after any necessary cleanup) that pee and poop go in the potty (or toilet) and to remember to use the toilet next time. By the end of Summer after kindergarten and during the beginning of first grade I started to ask for the bathroom when I needed it more consistently and accidents (of both kinds) started to drop off significantly. It was only by some time around the end of grade school (around fourth or fifth grade (age ten or eleven)) that my daytime accidents completely stopped and I was consistently clean and dry at night and no longer needed nighttime diapers. I think my mother made the mistake above because even though I was diagnosed (shortly after my two year checkup) as being on the spectrum (level two by today’s standards) and also having right hemisphere damage from a small stroke around the time I was born it was only mentioned that I had difficulties with communication (At this point I only knew how to say the words “Moon”, “Cat”, and “Clock”) and social skills but it was all in medical jargon and my parents didn’t understand it. They were at least given a mania file folder with papers explaining (in medical jargon) what I have and that’s how they eventually got me into some special education classes. My parents assumed that I understood more than I did (beginning around Simon’s current age) because I was able to say “Hi!” and “Bye!” and sometimes use single words to ask for something that I wanted. They also initially doubted my diagnosis because back in the late 1970s and early 1980s there was the idea that if you were autistic that you couldn’t talk at all. At least Rain Man and St. Elsewhere (as bad as they were) helped to correct that misconception. By the time I was four-and-a-half I was able to ask basic questions like “What’s that?” but it came out sounding more like “What that?”. I was more like five years old (or even five-and-a-half) by the time I learned pronouns like “I”, “you”, “he”, and “she”). Other pronouns and compound words (such as “hot dog”) would come later. This pretty much sums up my memories and observations on this topic for the time being.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing your story!💕💕💕

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Sometimes when kids are in the middle of toilet training (or have just started) (or occasionally even after being trained for a while) wetting and/or soiling can be a coping mechanism or a form of stress relief. For example this could be what was happening after Simon’s first day of preschool, and just before the doctor’s visit when the strap on the braces for his feet needed to be adjusted. As Simon’s training improved (e.g. by the time of his preschool field trip) he understood (at least at that particular moment) the difference between diapers and underwear and he realized that he was no longer supposed to “go” in his car seat when he was stressed out. Therefore that’s likely why he was chewing on his plastic sandwich bag about a minute into that video. Simon is level one and likely doesn’t typically experience as much stress as Ezra does and therefore doesn’t chew as often as Ezra. You probably already know that Simon and Ezra are not the only autistic kids who deal with stress by chewing (or biting) on things. For example, if you have been watching some of the Autism Family’s recent videos you will notice that Alistair has been toilet trained for a bit over a year (maybe about a year-and-a-half now). That’s good, but now that he no longer has wetting or soiling available as coping mechanisms that he can draw on he is chewing more than he used to. This includes chewing or biting on his hand. Incidentally with Simon being recently toilet trained you will need to watch him for this and intervene if he begins to perform this type of stimming. This will likely be especially true as his nighttime toilet training progresses. As soon as he no longer has bed-wetting (or even perhaps nighttime soiling) available as a stress relief mechanism you may notice a significant increase in stimming (in all of its forms) with Simon. On one of the Autism Family’s videos I suggested in one of the comments that Alistair could possibly suck on a lollipop (such as a Tootsie Roll Pop) or chew on some chewing gum as an alternative to biting his hand. This is also a tip to keep in mind in the event that Simon begins to do this. By the way it just occurred to me that Alistair may be chewing on his hand instead of his chew toys due to dental pain. This is likely the case if Alistair has gum recession or any exposed dentin. You may want to mention this at some point to the autism family when you meet or other talk with them if the subject comes up for any reason. I have noticed that Alistair’s speech seems to have come along quite a bit lately but this doesn’t necessarily mean that he can communicate about dental pain, stomach aches, ear aches, headaches, and the like. It has been a while since they have uploaded a video about where Alistair is verbally so I don’t know how well he can communicate these things. From what I remember he talks more than Simon does but that may or may not include an improved ability to verbally communicate if he is in pain versus where Simon is at this point (for example). Conceivably (despite their age difference) they might both still use phrases like “No Owie” even though Alistair is in Elementary school and has a larger vocabulary than Simon and speaks in sentences more often than Simon does. When I was six years old in kindergarten I knew the names of many objects and was able to say some sentences, and even ask some questions here and there but I still wasn’t able to tell people when I was in pain (let alone what was hurting). For example at age six I had an ear infection but I wasn’t able to tell my parents what was hurting. I was just able to put my hand over my ear and cry until my mother knew what was wrong and took me to a local hospital that evening. Within a hour or two after that I was home with some liquid Tylenol and a liquid antibiotic that sort of tasted like bananas. Since Alistair started talking about one to years later than I did (as I recall) his verbal communication could be about where mine was at age six. If so then his family, school, and any therapists might need to work on this aspect of verbal communication with him. Chances are they are already working on this, but they haven’t uploaded all that many videos lately so who knows? Also if Ezra has any gum recession and/or exposed dentin it may hurt for him to chew on things that are hard. This may be why he chews on his shirt and perhaps other soft things like blankets, towels, and perhaps even picnic blankets or table cloths. Ezra is not talking yet so we can only guess about this for now. This pretty much sums up my observations on this for the moment.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank your comments!❤️❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Regarding generalization: From what I remember of my own training generalization of training has several parts. First there is the understanding that stores, restaurants, and other places have toilets. I’m guessing that even as late as age four this doesn’t come easily for many kids (even some neurotypical ones) given that Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood has a whole episode about this. After this point there is the ability to verbally communicate a need first at home, then out and about. Simon seemed to understand by last September that bathrooms existed outside the house and he would generally make it if you noticed him doing a potty dance and took him to the bathroom. If this did not occur he would either try to wait until he got home or wait until he was somewhere comfortable (such as his car seat) before doing whatever he needed to do (only he knows for certain which one he was attempting to do in those instances. Also only he knows for certain whether he knew in those instances whether he had underwear or a diaper on. Maybe when his communication gets better he will be able to tell you this if he remembers the events and his thought processes well enough at that time.). Late last year or even earlier this year we haven’t heard much about the development of Simon’s verbal communication and how it has come along. From videos and comments I know that Simon is able to tell you what he needs at home. I have to wonder, though what happens if (for example) you are on a long shopping trip (e.g. to Target, Walmart, or a local grocery store) with the entire family and you are watching to make sure that no one wanders off but maybe you’re not specifically watching for potty dances in those situations. In those instances (even in an unfamiliar store) is Simon able to verbalize that he needs to “go” and wait for the rest room or is that still something that will come later? By way of reference since I was level two when I was growing up (I’m currently level one) I didn’t consistently verbalize when I needed to “go” when I was out and about until I was at some point past my sixth birthday. In fact one of my first memories of being able to do this (if not my first) was on a family road trip to Niagara Falls at age six and three quarters (not long before I started first grade). Prior to that I would usually try to wait until I got home. Whenever that wasn’t option for any reason and before being able to verbalize my need (shortly after turning six when I was no longer in diapers during the day) I would then try to wait for the car seat instead. By that point I understood that the car seat wasn’t a toilet. I also understood that it had a checkerboard style car seat protector that was there for sippy cup spills and the like. Looking back this was probably a car seat protector made by the manufacturer specifically for that car seat since it had the same pattern on it as the car seat itself. Fortunately I didn’t need to use this option all that often (although it was there if I needed it, and my mother was usually pretty understanding about it when those situations came up (even at that age (shortly after I started kindergarten (I started kindergarten just before I turned six.)))) because my control was pretty good by then (I could usually wait for at least an hour-and-a-half, sometimes two hours if I limited my fluid intake (I think I started to understand about limiting fluid intake around the time that I turned six.)). By the time of the Niagara Falls family road trip/vacation I was bigger and no longer in a car seat (presumably because I had outgrown it by then). Therefore given the absence of a car seat protector I needed to learn to generalize my verbalization of my needs by that time and (at least for the most part) I was there by then. From what I remember I was better able to do this on the second half of the trip than the first half (without going into any unnecessary detail). Looking back I think fatigue and/or stress levels played some role in my ability to do this even at that point. I’m guessing that Simon is either pretty much there or at the very least coming along in this area since he’s level one and getting fairly close to four-and-a-half by now. For Ezra you will probably want to work more with having him communicate with his iPad not only at home but also in other settings like restaurants, picnics, etc. This will become especially important when you add options to his iPad for “Pee”, “Poop”, and “Potty”. If battery life issues are effecting Ezra’s iPad you may want to get a car charger and/or a battery pack for it. When the iPad is charging you will want to watch Ezra closely to make sure that he does not chew on the charger or the charging cable. Without going into too much detail it would not be safe for him to do this. The Apple Web Site should have more information about electrical safety when it comes to iPads and other Apple devices. Having some good charging options for Ezra’s iPad (provided that all proper precautions are taken) will allow you to use in it more locations when you are out and about. This should help greatly with Ezra’s communication and potty training (especially when it comes to generalization in those areas).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Great ideas for potty training!❤❤❤

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Some parents and grandparents that I know have found that shorts with an elastic waistband (similar to what you would find on a bathing suit) can be useful during the early days of toilet training.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing. ❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was almost certainly level two when I was younger (I’m now level one) so my training was between where Ezra’s and Simon’s were at almost any given time. This video is a very good video about training someone with level one autism. Maybe you can do future videos about levels two and three in this regard. For level two you may need to talk to some parents of kids with level two autism and find out what worked for them. My own recollections of being there when I was younger are only the experiences of one person and in addition no one has a perfect memory (even if my early memories are usually more accurate than not).

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you so much for sharing.

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I just happened to randomly remember while looking at an art-related web site within the past hour or so that in addition to the points mentioned in this video kids who are training (whether autistic or neurotypical) will sometimes have accidents for reasons other than regression or getting simply distracted/waiting too long. For example: I. The individual in training (usually in the earliest days of the training process) might be wearing something like a pull-up (or other diaper) and sit down on the potty chair or toilet and due to either fatigue, stress, or simple forgetfulness neglect to remove the diaper before sitting down. II. The individual in training might “have an accident” as a result of mistakenly believing that he or she has a diaper on when in fact he or she is actually wearing underwear. This type of mistake is quite common if the kid who is in training just started training a short time ago and/or if the parents either frequently or have very recently switched back and forth between diapers and underwear. In certain situations (like shopping trips or car rides) where the child cannot simply look down and see whether a diaper or a pair of underwear is there it is possible to misremember and make a mistake as a result. From what I have seen in books, articles, and blogs neurotypical children usually make mistake types I and II up to anywhere between age two and age three-and a quarter to three-and-a-third. Kids who either have a mild intellectual delay (for any reason) or who have level one autism (even without an intellectual delay) can make both types of mistakes until age three-and-a-half, three-and-three quarters, or sometimes even after the fourth birthday. At level two (like I was growing up, I’m currently level one) one can make mistake types I and II until age five-and-a-half or even perhaps five-and-three-quarters (like I did). At level three these types of mistakes are still possible for some unknown amount of time beyond this. There is also a third type of mistake (seen almost exclusively in males) that occurs during and after learning how to use the toilet standing up. This can occur because using the toilet standing up involves the somewhat unusual (and difficult-to-learn process) of opening the urethral sphincter while keeping the rectal sphincter closed. I will not describe this one further but it’s easy enough to visualize. This type of mistake can occur in neurotypical children up to age three-and-a-half, or even up to about the fourth birthday or so. This mistake type can happen with kids who are level one up to age four-and-a-half, five, or sometimes even five-and-a-half. With someone who is level two this mistake type can occur until age eight (or perhaps even nine) like it did with me when I was learning. Presumably at level three this can happen for even a bit longer but I don’t know any details beyond that. Regarding the final type of accident if one happens to see someone have this type of accident (whether the individual having it is autistic or neurotypical) it can look a lot (or even exactly) like an on-purpose rather than an accident because it is one of only two accident types (after the earliest days of potty training when one has learned to pull down a pull-up of some kind before sitting down) where there is some type of pushing involved (The other intentional-looking accident type is the one where one is wearing underwear and erroneously thinks that he or she has a diaper on.). If one happens to see either of these two accident types no punishment (including time outs) should be given because it is not truly a deliberate act even though it does really look like one. Instead only a change of clothes, some clean-up, and a gentle verbal reminder of what to do next time is needed.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for taking the time to share your observations and thoughts with us!😊😊

[@thomasschoeck9080]

I was just reading an article online about potty training regression and the article mentioned that one of the changes that can cause a regression is moving from a crib (for example) to a new bed. Even though Simon seemed to like his new bed I wonder if maybe that was what might have triggered the potty training regression in the regression section of this video (especially if the dog bed was comforting for him). I’m not sure because I don’t know when that regression happened. Fortunately that regression seemed to have been fairly short-lived (probably lasting less than a week). From the sound of it Simon’s daytime potty training was back on track soon after that. Regarding Ezra’s possible fear of the flush: Either that article or another article on the same site mentioned two things that parents can do to help kids to overcome their fear of the flush. One is to have the child stand next to the toilet and flush some toilet paper in order to become familiar with the flushing process. Another suggestion made is to have the child (at least initially) stand up before flushing so that the fear of being flushed down the toilet won’t be an issue. On a similar note the related fear of going down the drain is a common enough one that Mister Roger’s Neighbor has an episode about it. More recently (I think all the way back in the 1990s) Rugrats also had an episode where Chuckle was afraid of going down the drain during bath time. According to TV Tropes that Rugrats episode (titled “Down the Drain”) is Season 2 episode 19. I should note, though, that Chuckie’s fear started after Angelica told him a story so that episode would probably not be the best for Simon or Ezra (at least until they eventually have a better understanding of the differences between fact and fiction). The Mister Roger’s Neighborhood 1996 episode “You Can Never Go Down the Drain” would be much better for them if at least one of them has this fear. The PBS KZbin channel also has this Mr Roger’s song. The song was also in some Mr Roger’s episodes going back to at least the 1970s (or perhaps the late 1960s) so in other words this fear seems to be one that kids have had for a long time.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!💙💜💙

[@thomasschoeck9080]

Possible potty seat safety issues: I just looked at the Amazon reviews for the potty seat that Simon is using (using the link provided in the video description for this video) and one of the reviews states that the product fell apart after no more than 6 months and that it resulted in their two-year-old being injured in a fall. That review warns users about the potential dangers of this product. In addition, other users (and the product description) mention that this product doesn’t fit all toilets. Therefore this product might be good for some people (at least in the very short term) but not others. Hopefully Simon will outgrow this product before it wears out. If the more negative product reviews are even remotely accurate you will want to check Simon’s potty seat on a regular basis for any signs of wear and tear and consider replacing it if you have any questions about it.

[@7Aheadfamily]

❤️❤️❤️

[@thomasschoeck9080]

It’s good to see that Simon understands the phrase “Where is it?” Is he also able to ask questions like this?

[@7Aheadfamily]

Yes. He asks things like, “mama, where are you?”

[@thomasschoeck9080]

@@7Aheadfamily That’s good. I think I was about four or five before I was able to ask questions like this.

[@7Aheadfamily]

Thank you for sharing!