13 Harsh Psychology Truths - Adam Lane Smith

Adam Lane Smith is a psychotherapist an author.
Adam wrote one of the best threads on Twitter which I've seen this year, our first episode on this ended up being one of my favourite episodes of the year so here we go again with some more uncomfortable psychology insights.
Expect to learn why RedPill alpha gurus are taking advantage of you, why "I love you but I'm not in love with you" is a red flag, how men & women bond differently during sex, why needing to be right will keep you friendless and stupid, why you should never tweet for midwits, how women in hookup culture don't realise they're being used and much more...
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#dating #psychology #sex
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00:00 Intro
02:59 Why You Should Choose Your Partner Carefully
07:07 The Truth About Red Pill Gurus
22:45 Should Kids Move Out at 18?
30:42 Chemical Differences Between Genders During Sex
39:39 Signs of Broken Attachment
44:08 The Impact of Sacrifice in a Relationship
48:32 Don’t Tweet for Midwits
53:27 Do Men Care About Bodily Imperfections?
1:02:44 How to Establish Healthy Expectations in a Partnership
1:07:58 Why Hookup Culture Doesn’t Bring Meaningful Connections
1:20:36 Where to Find Adam
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Listen to all episodes on audio:
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Spotify: spoti.fi/2LSimPn
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Get in touch in the comments below or head to...
Instagram: / chriswillx
Twitter: / chriswillx
Email: chriswillx.com/contact/

[@ChrisWillx]

Join the Modern Wisdom Community now - modernwisdom.locals.com/. Here’s the timestamps: 00:00 Intro 02:59 Why You Should Choose Your Partner Carefully 07:07 The Truth About Red Pill Gurus 22:45 Should Kids Move Out at 18? 30:42 Chemical Differences Between Genders During Sex 39:39 Signs of Broken Attachment 44:08 The Impact of Sacrifice in a Relationship 48:32 Don’t Tweet for Midwits 53:27 Do Men Care About Bodily Imperfections? 1:02:44 How to Establish Healthy Expectations in a Partnership 1:07:58 Why Hookup Culture Doesn’t Bring Meaningful Connections 1:20:36 Where to Find Adam

[@carlitosvodka]

I have a problem with "1:02:44 How to Establish Healthy Expectations in a Partnership" I try and agree on something but she doesnt keep her part of the agreement. I find that not honourable and yes I justify not continuing the relationship

[@ashdapr1]

Hi Chris! There is a woman who understands evolutionary psychology and is helping women heal so that they can undo the unhealthy feminist programming and have healthy happy relationships and marriages. Her channel is The Universe Guru. You should check her out.

[@canderous7774]

2 take aways from this awesome episode. 1. My wife and I are likely to last til one of us dies. 2. My wife has been using her degree in psychology to engineer parts of our relationship

[@Rustsamurai1]

Don't let her get the ascendency. Keep her guessing. Handle her roughly on occasion. Show her she is desired on a caveman level. Thinking you have her forever is a setup for quite the fall.

[@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559]

@@Rustsamurai1 Don't ever handle a woman roughly - the mentally sound ones won't appreciate it AT ALL.

[@CONEHEADDK]

"Go to the gym"? As I once asked two bulging "friends" of mine: "Have you lifted anything interesting recently"? From the looks on their faces, I don't think, they had... I would drop dead of boredom, if I were to lift weights for more than about as long, as I can hold my breath. Do you fookin' meditate at the same time, or wtf is there (not) happening inside your heads???

[@paulmurphy3922]

@@Rustsamurai1 you are talking shite

[@stevepickford3004]

My take away was that Matt still doesn't know I'm seeing his wife

[@socialmoth4974]

As a wife and mother, I agree about the man being a good father. I LOVE seeing my husband and daughter spending time together. It gives me so much peace in my heart.

[@tiesiai_per_aplinkui]

I am currently pregnant and just watching my Husband playing with my dog fills my heart, and my mind goes to conclusions: he will be a great father. 🫣😂 We'll see.

[@DemetriPanici]

*"Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking." - Marcus Aurelius*

[@markwhite2207]

And marking sure the bagpipes stay bolted to the wall...

[@Macheako]

wtf am I supposed to do with this vague ass quote? lol

[@DeepHealingVibes]

@@Macheako It's as clear as day to me. For me, it essentially means working on controlling your reactions to things you don't have control over and that nobody can make you feel a certain way without your permission. Once you become good at doing these, you are on your road to discovering what freedom truly means when you no longer have attachment issues with things, circumstances, and the people around you. It's hard to understand if you haven't experienced it yet. Read more on Marcus Aurelius and how to live a stoic life. Try applying different philosophies and ways of life that is ought to make you a much better person. You will not get your answer right away and the road ahead will be long-winded and challenging. But once you get there, it will be well worth it. Come back to this comment in a year or so and let us know what the journey was like for you🙂

[@psychedelicartistry]

Agreed. It's all in your way of perceiving life and reacting calmly to all situations. Sometimes I forget, and let my emotions get the better of me, but I always reel it back in. Nobody's perfect.

[@cleverkittn]

@@Macheakolearn from it, if you have enough brains to do so

[@heatherthaxton451]

Ooh love this discussion! Happy marriages and relationships can exist. This idea that the other sex is always bad ignores the fact that men and women DO have happy, balanced relationships.

[@stevengruber57]

Absolutely. Social media and dating apps have exacerbated gaps in outcome between men and put physical distance between the sexes in public spaces, but the natural laws of attraction are still there.

[@pretorious700]

Happy and balanced relationships is the last thing the state wants, because it does not foment anxiety and division. The state thrives on weakness and exploits unhappiness.

[@CONEHEADDK]

@@pretorious700 Problems create jobs. Peace and not needing more crap or travels aso doesn't.

[@Xarkom89]

Part of the issue is by nature a lot of people look on the negative side of things. It’s not out of want but the natural inclination of trying to avoid bad situations or harm. For many it’s a hard hurtle to cross. People need to DROP prior inclinations when they go on a date with someone new. Drop the assumptions, LISTEN and observe the new person. Then over time learn their character.

[@Fanaro]

Please do create a playlist with all your evolutionary psychology podcasts, this stuff is gold.

[@High_Rate136]

Lmfao, “Gravity pulls things down, and I’m an unlovable piece of crap.” That was unintentionally hilarious

[@KimSkid2k]

THANK YOU! After the first one, I've been reading ALL Adam Lane Smiths stuff and seen the other interviews with him. He has made one of the biggest impacts on my adult life. Together with Jordan Peterson, Gabor Mate, Andrew Huberman, and of course... Big Daddy, Joe Rogan... Thanks Chris.. Keep it up!!

[@if-not-now]

:D

[@stvbrsn]

If you inadvertently omitted Gad Saad, that’s ok. If you haven’t heard him yet… you must!

[@krimsonsun10]

Same! Thank you so much for introducing me to Adam.

[@PanHaszaman]

It's same selection for me + (Love it or hate it) Andrew Tate.

[@moonknight4053]

Joe Rogan has good points but he ain’t nowhere near on the level of the other guys. You will NEVER hear gabor mate talk about masculinity or Andrew tate the way rogan does. Actually rogan had good points on masculinity but him jerkin off tate is fuuuuucked bruv

[@tiesiai_per_aplinkui]

Me and my husband bought an old house together which we are renovating together, there were many days where we worked on in from morning to sunset, and I was really interested that my husband was overwelmingly happy and even saying him self that this sort of things bonds more then anything else in a relashioship, I wasn't feeling exactly that, now I understand why, because men and women bond differently and these sort of things bonds my husband more to me. Very nice knowing it!

[@juliettailor1616]

"Love is action. If you don't take action, you don't love." ALS This is something that we should use to the entire society.

[@bradfordlangston836]

That first part about choosing a partner who loves them unconditionally really unlocked something in me. I need to be more confident and increase my self-worth.

[@amiller5885]

I think the "old fashion" idea of chivalry is where it's at in many ways. To aspire to those ideas and behaviors takes self-discipline and inner and outer strength. It seems many traditional values rides on learning how to be virtuous.

[@mup1537]

I think it’s an unrealistic definition of love and telling people it exists isn’t healthy.

[@mup1537]

@@officialthomasjames It's just reality Thomas. All love is conditional.

[@VitorHugoOliveiraSousa]

​@@officialthomasjames because it's delusional. If you have 2 children and one grape the other, will still love the grapist? Obviously not. Love is a involuntary response to virtue, you can love without that foundation of virtue. It's conditional. Even if you don't accept that definition, love like he said is work, and without reciprocity it becomes abuse and parasitism. A person that only takes. You can love that, you can love the fiction of that person that you created by the actual person you don't love.

[@carbon1479]

This conversation sounds incredibly healthy. I think of how sick my surroundings have been - pretty much any sign of imperfection (unless it socially conforms beautifully like sanctioned ignorance) is a sign that your parents never should have copulated. I can see where the bad stuff is infectious - ie. they keep raising the bar on the minimum for survival. I think one of the things that bothered me the most was coming to understand that the idea of a 'good person' hardly seems acceptable anymore - ie. there's bullies, there's wimps, and only kindof-wimps/kindof-bullies in between, it's like they've (people leading the push on the contagion of dark triad traits) annihilated any healthy middle ground whatsoever and did so for the sake of dominating anyone they could.

[@StreetForged]

Once you've put someone in a box, it becomes incredibly easy to attack them without recourse. It takes all the nuance out of the individual and applies a simple blanket so the attacker doesn't have to consider the fact that they're being animalistic and hateful. The most obvious example is how so many people want to see murderers murdered themselves, as if somehow that solves anything or makes them any better than the murderer.

[@carbon1479]

@@StreetForged the other madness with animalistic and hateful - it's closer to physics. Physics plows down and destroys things because it's the root fundamental, this world hinges on physics not art, poetry, or philosophy so it has the upper hand on complexity and especially so if (in the human context) it also has strength in numbers.

[@VitorHugoOliveiraSousa]

​@@StreetForged LOL it's obviously solves the problem and wishing harm to people that do harm do not make you the same. You are equate the violence of the rapist with the violence of the victim to defend himself or bring forth justice.

[@Unvaccinatedpureblood]

I don’t think Low premarital sex alone is a predictor for low divorce rate. It’s merely correlation. Men who marry those women with low or none premarital sex are already a filtered group. And those pairs are not the average pairs.

[@MrLuigiFercotti]

That comment about about a woman fixing her attachment issues with a family, and then getting fed up with yours is spot on.

[@DoctorHemi]

17:12 The red pill describes what Chris points out here as the "epiphany phase". It's usually somewhere around age 27-30 when she decides it's time to settle down and have a family (she may even "find God" for the first time in her life here). It sounds like a good thing, but the problem is at this phase, a woman will "settle" to solve her desire for a family. The guy is often someone less experienced with relationships, but a good, solid, dependable provider. He feels like his patience and hard work finally paid off...he's the one who "tamed" her and "showed her what a good man can be", but in reality she just settled for him. Once the kids are born and past the complete parental dependence stage, she'll likely want a divorce...leaving the man with a broken family, limited access to his kids and possibly a big child support bill each month (in most cases, child support is much more money than the cost of raising the kids together would be). In essence, the epiphany phase can be a very dangerous trap for good men. 28:55 "I love you but I'm not IN love with you." When a woman says that, it can mean what Adam says if the problem is the man is not being a responsible provider (i.e., like a large child...often with addiction issues), but there's also a flip side where it can also mean she is bored with you (i.e., the ONLY thing you are to her is a provider...see above).

[@DoctorHemi]

@@cantbendknee, I remember him talking about that but had nothing to add. He's right that it's a bad behavior by men which leads to a terrible feedback loop for women AND men in the sexual market. Geneally speaking, human sexual relations is in a bad place right now.

[@Xplora213]

TC, you are pathologising a fundamental reality of female life progression. They spend 12 years at school, 5 more years at college, they are 23 years old and are going to want to spend 5 years applying 17+ years of education before retreating from the workforce to have a family. Which is 27-28 years old. That’s your threshold age.

[@DoctorHemi]

@@Xplora213, I don't mean to sound like I'm saying it's wrong or evil. I'm just describing a pattern that's been pointed out over and over and over in the red pill community. Women may not even realize that's what they're doing at the time. Regardless, it's something that inexperienced men need to be aware of about women in that age range.

[@jpw2184]

@@cantbendknee Yes. Men masturbate. So?

[@chrispark7010]

@@Xplora213 I wonder what they're doing from 23-28. Perhaps they're having their fun? Exploiting their SMV? I don't like using red pill terms but the WALL seems to be pretty instinctual. As far as I'm concerned, Adam didn't really address the talking points that red pill are aspousing. Instead this entire discussion was "nah thats wrong" really? What's wrong with the data they're using or the conclusions they're coming to.

[@misteroz]

Much as I love the channels I follow, and yours especially Chris, it's rare I ever get to the end of a video and think "Wow, I need to watch that again". Far too insightful to properly digest on a single viewing.

[@hoviksmail]

If you have to walk around telling people you're an Alpha Male it means you're not. Just like going around telling people you're cool. If you were that thing, other's would recognize it, you wouldn't have to tell them. They're just trying to convince themselves.

[@CONEHEADDK]

I'm to alpha and cool to believe that.

[@LeeAdrian777]

But anything you aim at you eventually become. Even if it’s fake it till you make it for awhile.

[@zapazap]

Saying 'X' and having to say 'X' are not the same. Cheers! :)

[@zapazap]

@@LeeAdrian777 Remember that Stan, in Monty Python, aimed at becoming a mother. Cheers! :)

[@lennard5393]

Tell this to my mother.

[@1Humanoid]

I LOVE this guy. We need more like him. Thank you for informing me of him. ❤️🙏🧿

[@jeremy8692]

I wad married for 10 yrs, worked several jobs and at times worked myself into the ground to provide for her, gave her 3 children and give her the best live I could. And I got "I love you but not in love with you" statement. What else could I do? As the same time she's "friends" with another guy and was seeing him several hours several times a week. I can see why men become red/black pilled.

[@corichang]

Sorry to hear that, man. You might have married a narcissist from your descriptions of your situations. Your love language was to work and provide. Hers was to take and unload her dissatisfaction onto you while engaging in immoral behaviors.

[@abhishekchavhan2018]

@@corichang that's not a narcissistic woman, that's a woman

[@juneelle370]

That makes no sense. Men cheat as well. It’s about equal amounts at this time. It’s equally wrong and immoral in both cases.

[@jeremy8692]

@@juneelle370 it makes 100% prefect sense. That was my experience, I wasn't justifying men, my point was a man can give all of his heart and body to a woman and she'll still get board.

[@juneelle370]

Being “bored” happens with both sexes if they don’t appreciate trust and safety. I’m sorry there are so many people in the world who take so much and give/feel so little. I really don’t think that’s the majority of the cause behind most women initiating divorces. Sexism is taught so deeply to men and even women who strive for a healthy love cannot do it alone. Equality is about equal respect and so much of the dynamic that is taught to men is about domination/disrespect/control and most women just finally get sick of it and want out. It’s not just women being “bored” that makes them file for divorce. No excuses for either sex that cheats though (in the vast majority there will be strange exceptions)… because there can be divorce done with integrity but not cheating!

[@macabre2899]

This guy Adam, I get the the impression that his job is emotionally exhausting. Doubly so since it's stranger after stranger who's problems he's helping sort through. Mental trauma is intimidating so props to him.

[@ipeeontheworld]

" love is action " . I wish i could send that to some people that i no longer have connection to. That part was so good, amazing guest.

[@kurosan0079]

22:45 My experience resonates strongly with this opinion. Living together with extended family members. Growing up with people who actually care about you makes life feel a lot less lonely. You're never truly alone. When I was in a deep rut, it was them who helped me pull out of it. I'd die for those people. Plus, it saves a lot of money. We get free fruits every year from my grandmother's trees.

[@Foxie770]

This is the best interview I’ve heard in a long time… thank you! We need to be having more honest and clear discussions like this as a human species. Get back to basics and reality!

[@danx1216]

Lol worst interview denying rad fem complex

[@doh917]

Chris, I appreciate your perspective but I would highly suggest getting Rollo Tomassi on your show. The Red Pill is a praxeology framework to understand intersexual dynamics. The part where you referred to women who partied then suddenly settled down is part of the life cycle of modern women. The "ho" phase is actually typical but as women get older they become less competitive in the sexual market place and their instincts are telling them to settle down and find someone to lockdown. This may work for some but whats been discovered over the past 50 yrs is that women will settle down with the nice guy based on circumstance not genuine desire and then will later on in life "discover" that she is no longer attracted to said man (marrying because of circumstance rather than desire aka settling). This leads to divorce around roughly ages 38-42 where the woman decides to seek out the type of alpha males she was accustomed to in her 20's and finding that she can no longer attain said man. That is become increasingly apparent as of late hence the divorce rates and age ranges of said divorces.

[@maximilianjakubik3706]

Rollo Tomassi is so malicious in his long monologes about "modern woman", that i cant take him serious anymore. Something is off on him.

[@doh917]

@@maximilianjakubik3706 That's an opinion but how he says something vs what's being said is different. If a schizophrenic says the sky is blue it doesn't refute the fact that the sky is blue. An emotional reaction to a perceived individual doesn't discredit the statements that are made. He may have biases but his arguments are the arguments based on data and facts. Now of course the typical response is attack the facts, attack the person, attack whatever because its "morally" preferable. I surmise his position is frustration because he's been working on this for 20 yrs and everything he has claimed has come to fruition but people still refuse to accept uncomfortable realities precisely because they are uncomfortable. People are now coming to a fork in the road: Would you rather be happy or would you rather be right?

[@maximilianjakubik3706]

@@doh917 Yeah thats the point! Look at his 4 hour "kill to party" rambling about Mikhaila Peterson. He had so much opinion and feelings about her. That was not so much factbased but full of emotion. He made some good points in the past, but atm he is milking hurt man to much, and simplify woman to much for my taste.

[@doh917]

@@Dimitris_Balf Incel is a pejorative and doesn't apply since dude is married. Blackpill is an assumption because you don't like what he says because it offends your sensibilities. Sensitive men are going to find out quickly how that works out because the world is heading to a world war and your sensibilities aren't going to mean anything because as a man you're going to have to go and not by your choice. The generational cycle theory indicates within the end of an 80-90 year time frame a total war hits the Western world. That point ends 2028 and is predicted to 2025. Better fix your sensitivities because women are going to be the last of men's problems.

[@doh917]

@@Dimitris_Balf I never made any supporting remarks with regards to blackpill. I think people need to stop taking pills in general. But in a new atmosphere with completely different environmental circumstances, men, especially young men, need to understand the playing field less they be positioned in an uncompromising situation. The legal side that exists is a real threat and that information and how to operate in that environment should be the real sex education.

[@Chickiwi]

I have learned so much about male behaviour over this interview. Wishing I had been aware of this earlier in my now old life, but then I was not was not then wise enough to apply it. Conundrums!

[@CONEHEADDK]

There's a huuuge difference between being told, and being explained. Most of the correct things "we" were told by old farts years ago, weren't backed up with any explainations, and then they were just yet another "you are wrong" attack from one of the bitter old people, that were jealous of our youth to us.. I feel the same way as you do..

[@bugsbunny2944]

I feel like I'm going to have to listen to this 2-3 times. So rich in information

[@redboy8883]

One of the best podcasts I've followed. Chris brings on the best people and also asks the best questions

[@backfirexpression]

To suggest that a marriage disintegrates because a man doesn't have a good relationship with his children gives too much credit to a woman and too little to a father.

[@psiga]

BOOM. Straight out of the gate you hit us with the good stuff. Liking, commenting, and already subscribed. Thank you, Chris and Adam!

[@jennymum]

Thanks guys. Thank you forever, please keep spreading this message.

[@marywimmer5018]

There is no homestead, no ancestral land in America for anyone. When I went back to Vietnam it felt like home because my forebears were from there and everyone called me “sister”.

[@dimpleseve]

Growing up, my mom told me that she had only wanted sons (she has 2) not a daughter and we never really got along but that was ok because I had my dad. When my mom and dad split up, I no longer got to see him often and because he and my mother did not like each other, he did not come around often. Listening to what was said on this podcast today helps me understand a lot about myself if the portion about the way you are treated by your parents also refers to women!

[@CE-vd2px]

Hey I'm sorry about that. We all have our struggles. How are things now that it is a year later from when you made this comment?

[@pil3driverwaltz164]

Fantastic episode. Chris is a great interviewer/conversationalist. I'll definitely have another listen through.

[@felixthecat4584]

This guy is a genius. I am not even done with this podcast yet and I am already looking him up to see if I can read his books/ take his class/ hear more of his ideas.

[@MissionToast]

Watching "Sex and the City" was very educational into the women's mind for me. It tault me the rationality of their "irrationality" and why your woman needs constant reminders that you love her.

[@JedSaidTherapy]

That - was - AWESOME! Grateful to know I'm not the only person helping clients see this. Keep up the 💪 work.

[@15walkeen]

I wish I would have discovered this gentleman earlier.

[@aek72]

Quick comment on 21:00 I’ve heard the :”oh , he was a great father but a lousy husband “so often from divorced women. Go figure.

[@honeyfurfarm2182]

Because it's easy to have fun with a little kid and play that role. Many don't put that extra effort in with their partner and neglect the woman. My mom is this situation to a T. My dad treats her like crap but he was always a good dad. Maybe not an overly affectionate or as involved as my mom but he wasn't a bad dad.

[@hexstaticloonatic4194]

Fuck. The "first we try to beat the shit out of each other, then we become best friends" has happened with most of my best friends. In our defence, we were about 15 or so, but wow that one really hit home

[@victoriaransom8459]

This interview is everything... educational, informative, and entertaining. Everything makes total sense to me.

[@davidhunt7427]

The most Hateful thing I have ever had to learn is that in any relationship,.. the person who cares the least about maintaining the relationship,.. has the most power negotiating within the relationship. I want to destroy all of existence itself whenever I contemplate this horrible fact!!?!

[@davidhunt7427]

I found out very late in life that I am autistic,.. and, apparently,.. I can almost never be loved by hypergamous women. Check out the divorce statistics between normal women and autistic men; it's horrifying! Thing is,.. I feel as though I have been far more punished for being heterosexual than I have ever been for being autistic.

[@davidhunt7427]

*_What is a short definition of a man?_*_ A life support system for a wallet._ *_What is a short definition of a woman?_*_ A life support system for a vagina._ Now riddle me this,.. which joke is the more sexist and demeaning? In my experience, men always wonder, while women never do.

[@purpessenceentertainment9759]

“The person who cares the least about maintaining the relationship” only applies to unhealthy people. With healthy people it is “A chain is only as strong as the weakest link” or “Raise the tides, raise the boats”. Good people project their true authentic self, unhealthy people project their true authentic self. You must go on a “spiritual journey” and find who you truly are. Know what you are, a man (use evolutionary psychology as a microscope), but to know who you are is what you want in your lifetime. If you died tomorrow, would you be satisfied how you left the world? Or has your work not been done yet? Don’t let a small group of people that did you wrong skew your worldview. Dive internally to find the answers. Study your thoughts. Throw out the thoughts you don’t want. I call it mental king fu.

[@davidhunt7427]

@@purpessenceentertainment9759 With Respect,.. you have no idea what you are talking about in reference to autism,.. which isn't fixable,.. anymore than being congenitally blind or deaf is fixable. A better attitude certainly helps,.. but it can't ever get me where I want to go. See kzbin.info/www/bejne/j6XLoXyDr8-Yr68 for more.

[@nakitanash2189]

Unless, the person who cares most about the relationship, also cares most about themself.

[@NJIT22]

He is spot on in so many points

[@bamfski]

Love this conversation, wish more people thought this way. But that's why there's an audience for every conceivable topic.

[@paulwary]

Seems balanced, except for comparing red pill with feminism. While they ARE similar in attitude as described, they would only be comparable if red-pill had existed for 100 years, had indoctrinated 90-100% of men, and had institutional support across education, media, law, and government policy. It would also require that men's groups work actively to *dismantle* women-only spaces, women's support networks, and of course, feminism itself, and had institutional support as they did so.

[@0MoTheG]

Red pill is about reality and a reaction to falsehoods, is feminism?

[@StaalBurgher0]

Yes well, you are right, but they were simply meaning same "in principle".

[@robgoodsight6216]

Extremely interesting. Well done!

[@robgoodsight6216]

Thinking where to have my cottage in the woods for the apocalypse to finish!🤦‍♂️🤣🤣🤣

[@allyourbase888]

Thank you for validating my experience. 🙏🏽

[@robertlopez8077]

Great advice but NEVER without a prenup.

[@kimberlywrobel]

I looove looove looove this channel and the guests so much. We need more of this kind media influence. ❤ Adam is also amazing. I'm following him now. We need 100 of him to bridge the gap between generations. ❤

[@CVsnaredevil]

Great episode, just like the first one. Thanks!

[@basedinliberty9322]

This was an excellent episode! Have him back some time!

[@matthewthehawk1066]

Very intelligent discussion. Well done Chris.

[@mindset_kanal]

Great conversation! Thanks!

[@neelsdp1]

Extremely informative!

[@angelagrace6695]

So Good you two, so many important gems.

[@LoulousCorner]

I agree with the whole red pill thing just feeding into the attachment issues. I had a work client who was clearly stuck in his beliefs that he would be forever alone, was running 3 businesses, with a job! So he was doing nothing but working. In the 2 months i worked for him, he made an effort to stay home the morning i would be there, and spent an hour MINIMUM, talking to me. He opened up a lot about things, and was very clearly interested in me. I kept my boundaries, but shared some of my stories with him too, i treated him with kindness and compassion, and when he returned home to a spotless house, laundry done, bed made, a listening and understaning ear first thing in the morning. He got a taste of what a partner should be, but, unfortunately i couldn't be that person to do that for him long term, I'm married, and had just fallen pregnant during these 2 months. We parted ways, and thanked eachother for the lessons. 3 months later he was in a relationship after being single for 5 years, and he's happy!! I couldn't be more happy and relieved for the guy, he deserves to have what he both wants and needs.

[@tinacraven2782]

I'm halfway through and having to stop to go to work 😕. I am enjoying this so much. I think this is my favorite interview so far. 👍

[@MrChuckUTube]

I enjoy hearing someone else getting the word out about the dangerous trend over the past century. We went from thousands of years were the populations didn't take on debt, lived within a narrow radius of their kin and childhood friends and worked together as a... Whats the word I'm looking for... Community. Unfortunately without that system of safety nets, everything begins to breakdown. There is obviously a risk of communes, but its good to see the idea of pan-generational housing/lots is making a comeback.

[@insights3140]

He’s totally right. Watching the husband play with the kids makes me feel safe and secure and totally at peace. I’m glad to hear some more balanced perspectives. Manosphere is frightening.

[@insights3140]

Definitely talk to married people who have grown together. It’s about gratitude for one another and choosing to show up for each other and themselves.

[@jasonpauldegraaf]

Manosphere is frightening? Modern women are terrifying. They initiate the vast majority of divorces. They disrespect you in front of you and in the company of their friends. They post screenshots of conversations to social media to mock you. None of your efforts are ever enough and they're constantly on the lookout for a better partner. They never say what they mean and expect you to read their minds. They ask for vulnerability and resent you when you share your fears and concerns. They are an ocean of unforgiveness and will regularly weaponize past incidents to use against you. Never have women been such a horror to men.

[@panteranegra1552]

Just subscribed to Adam's channel, great speaker

[@gomezfriesen]

Outstanding episode!

[@jameshynes4096]

Fantastic. Thank you

[@stripedcollar335]

I am going through what looks like the end of an 8 year marriage, and happened upon the red-pill in May, about a month after it got bad at home. I watched alot of content, but Kevin Samuels was who resonated most with me. I made a comment on one of his videos in which I mentioned that a) my wife is black and b) that she had 2 girls when we met, and I had a deluge of comments about me as a simp, among other things, that further wrecked my self esteem and set me back years in my therapy. What I didn't say then was that on top of having a single mom, her father raped me for the first 13 years of my life. When I finally found out for sure that this was abusive and could be stopped, she made me apologize to him for turning him in. I am back in therapy now and trying hard to build my life back in to something that I can be proud of. I know now that alot of the pain men have gone through is from attachment issues like mine. I hope one day I can help others. There are alot of bad pills out there. Let's all agree to seek health, and not revenge.

[@Familyfitfinance]

Really love the work you do here... This was a great conversation very insightful. One exception or interesting side note to the claim that women will observe a positive relationship between father and child and this should provoke a positive response in her brain chemistry. That might be true of healthy women but unfortunately in my experience.... If you married a pathological narcissist. She will only derive jealousy and a desire to destroy that relationship and she will act in ways to subvert that relationship constantly. When you realize that that's what's going on in your own relationship it's absolutely devastating.

[@juneelle370]

Hope you can try family counseling…

[@nickg1743]

Wow this was extremely insightful and helpful, thanks to Adam Lane Smith and thanks Chris keep up the great work you've definitely earned a subscriber

[@mthoodstyle]

This was so good. My husband and I just experienced the situation where he was less than ideal with the kids at bedtime and I was fuming afterwards. Luckily I kept my cool and addressed it the next day in a non personal way. I didn’t understand the extent of the momma bear undercurrent but it makes so much sense now. Plus I lose respect for him when he doesn’t follow through on things he says he’s going to do. We are married over 15 years and going strong but we still have lots to learn!

[@SD-ym1rt]

I am like your husband there, lots to work on for sure

[@terileventhal9309]

Thank you. I live alone and am pretty sad. Your ideas make a lot of sense

[@nickoxborrow]

Such good content - great chat 👏🤗

[@samscherer9291]

Wow- great guest Chris!

[@jamesfrieling8721]

Fire every time thank god for Chris !

[@mhcmhco]

such a pleasant guy, with lots of profound insights

[@Macheako]

I'm not giving up "on life", I'm just giving up on the belief that life is necessarily better when you help others (strangers) before you help yourself and your own kin.......human kind is ANYTHING but "One Big Family" LOL

[@_4L]

And that would be correct. How do you expect to help others when you haven’t helped yourself first. Once you help yourself you have the experience and resources to bring other people up with you and that’s what should be done

[@MrRocksW]

The point about kids moving out at 18 was so interesting. I'm 29 years old single man living alone with my Mum and Dad while working. I came to this conclusion myself independently. I'm planning to live on the same street until I die.

[@redemptionhappens7725]

Loyalty is good.

[@jesperburns]

I moved out at age 17 because I got the opportunity to live with friends instead of with my neurotic mom (and detached dad). Not everyone has parents they get along with. I can stomach them for about an hour a week. EDIT: I had a perfectly fine upbringing otherwise. Grade A student, top class athlete. I am thankful for what they've done for me and my brother but we have very different views of the world.

[@strartur]

@@jesperburns +100500 totally agree. I started to live with my grandparents when I was 13, because they were the obviously less troubled family/couple. Moved out at 20. Much better. And everytime my parents showed up in my life, trouble guaranteed.

[@benaiahwright937]

I need to go ahead and finally subscribe to this channel.

[@CorruptPolitician]

@10:45 This is what I needed to hear to get my "aha" moment, thank you Chris.

[@nefelibatacomingthrough2707]

One of the best Modern Wisdom vidya there is! +1

[@brennandenos246]

Holy shit brother i love you and your content so much i really appreciate these conversations. I feel like your my friend without even knowing you thanks for all this good work brother!!

[@sisiphas]

Sometimes ‘I love you but I’m not in love with you’ can simply mean I am no longer sexually attracted to you as I used to be.

[@nigelcartlidge7962]

Thanks guys. ❤

[@colummccrudden101]

This episode was gold.

[@benjams5743]

What a brill episode. Have followed Adam and will look for your other interview with him now. Great content.

[@ruperterskin2117]

Thanks for sharing.

[@charliehobson33]

this is great, love it, fun and interesting

[@MigueTran]

Oh boy, this will be a great one.

[@springgingerla]

On the honeydew/honey do list topic: it appears to me that this of be "weaponized' outside relationships, where women get all they want from men who think that there is a bonding opportunity and maybe a chance of a relationship while all there really was, was a woman wanting something to be transported to her place etc. When combined with ghosting or blaming the man for not understanding, that can create wound that would undermine the trust in these "bonding opportunities" even when they are genuine and then you really can't point your finger to what's wrong.

[@purpessenceentertainment9759]

That’s why it boils down to intention. Know your intention (why are you truly interacting with this girl) and find their intention. Develop rules to the engagement. Are you trying to get to know her romantically, as a friend, or an acquaintance? Then adjust accordingly. Don’t be a plow horse, especially for someone that doesn’t have your best interest.

[@OMAR-vq3yb]

Great content Chris---showing men the healthy way forward.

[@danmalone5365]

Disorganized attachment is real and it is a survival style that adolescent children adopted to survive their environment.

[@cthornton523]

Truth. And it's fixable, for both sexes. One must be diligent.

[@danmalone5365]

Basic fundamental rights as a human being (connection) (attunement) (trust) (autonomy) (love sexuality) this is the foundation of developmental stages of development. When these developmental markers are missed as children the mind continues to develop only now in a survival style fragmented from the original developmental markers

[@veritasiumtry2015]

😂😂😂 26:28 26:45 funny part where I suddenly laughed. This stream was useful thank you William and the guest.

[@meditation4632]

This was a good one

[@sebastianramirez9783]

Didn't expect Lee Syatt to be spittin all this wisdom

[@tomtom21194]

This is great 👍

[@MzCR73]

This guy is spot on... !

[@michaellorenson2997]

Excellent, thanks

[@alexanderfrench9236]

OMG ^.^ 21:35 Dude totally checks to see if his wife can hear him :D What a champion

[@landonh]

What an incredible podcast

[@Emin.V.Aliyev1]

This podcast was golden

[@TJ-kk5zf]

If you ask yourself why are women not attracted to me, you've already answered your question

[@mattanderson6672]

Thank you!!

[@gundegas1]

21:15 correct, plus " they want to fix attachment issue" 🙏

[@tinacraven2782]

The family scenery he described happens today in rural America. There are many families that live on the same land. I was very envious of them.... In a good way 😉