13 Thoughts About A Little Life

This is my first review in a series of twenty that I'll be doing this summer for the 20 Books of Summer project. I started with a doozy. I tried my best not to cry throughout this video, and I'm not entirely sure I succeeded. A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara is an incredible experience, a masterpiece of empathic fiction, and every bit as difficult to stomach as people have said. But I think the journey is worth it.
As always, I apologize for the extremely long video, but once I started talking about this book I couldn't stop. There's a lot to talk about in the book and there's even more to talk about in terms of people's reactions to the book.
No stone left unturned. I hope you enjoy.
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For more on the 20 Books Of Summer project, click here: • The 20 Books of Summer...
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[@helenadelapena8678]

For me this book was therapeutic because I had been self-harming for 6 years when I read it and seeing Jude 30 years down the line still destroying himself made me think about what and why I was doing this to myself and it helped me start my journey of recovery.

[@sarahmcdonough7713]

this is such a wonderful thing to read after having spent the last two weeks (the time since i started the book) kind of constantly worrying in the back of my mind about its effects on people with ANY kind of experience with any of the dozens of incredibly heavy topics contained in it. im sure this would be exactly the wrong thing for some people with those experiences to read and could potentially be quite dangerous so its so amazing to hear that you got such good things out of it. good for you, really

[@LuckyPide]

💖

[@Melisa-to3ob]

I know I'm crazy late to this comment, but I just want to say I'm proud of you for starting your recovery journey.

[@Star-vq8tz]

That's nice to hear! i hope you're doing okay

[@belleazelea2931]

I'm having a hard time whether should I read the book or not (because I do self-harm and attempt suicide for many times). But because of your comment, I am motivated now to read it. I hope things will get better after I read it. Thank you and stay safe! ❤

[@annac9534]

When I finished the final page of A Little Life, I felt as though someone I had known for years died. For days I felt like I was mourning the loss of someone I knew personally. On top of that, I have random thoughts about this story and these characters months and months after finishing it. Probably my favorite book and I am considering reading it a second time to digest it further.

[@samramajeed5315]

Same feelings 😭😭

[@maxmustermann-hx3fx]

Yes 100%.

[@MN-jd4xs]

i feel the exact same way

[@sammyr713]

I feel the exact same way. I cry and mourn like i’ve just lost a sister or parent.

[@Jah-Knee]

June 12

[@MatthewSciarappa]

THE LACK OF DEVELOPMENT IS THE STATEMENT THE AUTHOR IS TRYING TO MAKE!!!!!! YEEEESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@RickMacDonnell]

**flexes**

[@alexandra.a9428]

i read that exactly when he was pronouncing...

[@reginalemoine5809]

Wonderful review. It makes me so angry when people reduce this rich, full, heartbreaking novel to "torture porn." They say that what Jude goes through isn't believable. I agree that Yanagihara pushes the story to its limit. At the same time, though, the underlying story rings true. Predators are adept at spotting potential victims and it is not unheard of for victims of abuse to have been abused by multiple people. To think otherwise is naive at best. There are people in this world for whom every day is a struggle. They struggle to stay alive. They struggle to find some sort of normality. They struggle with the absolute loneliness of their existence. Frequently, they don't succeed and that's painful. There's also the issue of victims being heard and believed. Yanagihara tests the reader in this way, too. At what point do you stop believing Jude's story? At what point is his victimization beyond the pale and something we shouldn't discuss? I think those issues are what's at the core of the novel, as you intimated. Yanagihara forces the reader's hand. You can have empathy. You can sit with Jude, no matter how uncomfortable you are while doing so, or you can turn away. Anyway, I am pleased to see that someone out there got it. Well done.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks, Regina! And thanks for the insightful comment. Few books seem to have this interplay between author and reader. Others clearly find it frustrating. I find it fascinating. Glad you liked the video :)

[@ludovicjeremien]

Makes you angry, huh? I wonder how queer men feel.

[@ness4977]

This is perfectly put.

[@nilesoien4439]

I'm glad it worked for you, but boy, it really didn't for me. It just stopped being believable. I wasn't offended, I was just disengaged. I finished the book with a "Meh". The main character didn't feel real, so I had a hard time caring. To each their own, I suppose.

[@beatrixpendragon]

I have finished this book last night, and I am still processing my feelings for it. Off the top of my head all i can feel is grief. This is one of those books that make you feel old once you finish it.

[@bhaktichokshi]

I finished it an hour ago and it feels like a part of me slowly dies with it

[@marshallmurmeltier8929]

I just finished it and I have the feeling it'll stick with me for a long time

[@jacobharris4838]

Finishing the last few pages feels like reaching the end of a long life

[@samramajeed5315]

Yes true

[@samramajeed5315]

@@bhaktichokshi I finished it two days ago still not over it 😭😭😭

[@teresadunivent8571]

I watched an interview with the author, and I love that she wrote a book about an individual who can’t recover from their trauma. As a victim of child molestation, I believe this is a trauma that you don’t ever recover from; you just learn how to cope with it and some days are better than others. I live with this everyday, and I didn’t experience the extreme abuse Jude did. Lord! I hate to say that my abuse was less than his, but in my mind, I don’t think I would have ever been able to cope with that level. I struggle daily with my own. This book was cathartic for me; I was able to relate to someone who had the same feelings resulting from this abuse. It is an abuse no one ever wants to talk about. Victims of this abuse can’t just talk to anyone as the average person, in my experience, quickly changes the subject, won’t look you in the eyes or finds a comment to placate you. That journalist you quoted is just such a person. This is a crime many gloss over because many people can’t handle the sickness of it in our society!

[@RickMacDonnell]

A story about a person who can't get over their trauma was the thing that affected me the most about this book. You just don't read those narratives too often. It's always about overcoming stuff. But some of the time--a lot of the time--people just can't overcome their traumas. I'm happy to found some catharsis in the book! But at the same time, it's something you're going to have carry with you forever, most likely. As someone who isn't carrying something like that, I obviously can't fully put myself in your shoes. But I hope you're feeling the best you can, and when you're not, you have someone around to help you get through.

[@teresadunivent8571]

@@RickMacDonnell Thank you! I am blessed to have my own Willem. That said. I wanted to say I love your review. I have shared it with several people already.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks so much, Teresa! That means a lot, really.

[@tylerf.145]

same situation with me. hope youre doing well :)

[@lunamoone5231]

She didnt even do her research

[@hskxskdwj]

I never understood the people who complain about beings being "too sad" or "too traumatizing", not only is it such an insult to people who actually have been sexual abused in their childhood--it also stupid to read a book that is dealing with sexual abuse and then to expect it to be an easy ride. Things like the ones depicted in little life ARE happening in real life and Hanya Yanahigara did not shy away from the topic or tried to trivialize the abuse, she depicted it as neutral and realistically as possible (well in my opinion at least). If you're going to read a book about sexual abuse you will have to come prepared. Don't read this book if you're not in the right mental state to be confronted with the topics this book deals with. The depiction of the abuse isn't supposed to be a comfortable read, so don't expect it to be one. I've been abused in my early childhood and I've found her portrayal of the sexual abuse very accurate and very realistic (I'm thinking of the way Brother Luke manipulated Jude to come with him). Sometimes I felt like the book was speaking what's been my mind. It's annoying how authors are not even allowed to tackle heavy topics like sexual abuse, they're expected to depict it as mild as possible, to not upset anyone. Authors should be allowed to write about topics that could upset some audiences, but then again, if you're sensitive about topics like these, you shouldn't have grabbed the book in the first place.

[@ninkepie3764]

Genuine question: How is saying this book is "too traumatising" and insult to real victims? If anything it's the exact truth. Honestly this type of situation is nothing less than "too traumatising" and I think people who suffered through stuff like this would probably say its even more than that. I don't think everyone saying this is complaining. I've only read the plot description of this book and it that alone already seems way too traumatising to read or experience. Also, one of the reviews I heard was that the descriptions of what happens to Jude are so graphic, it's almost teaching you how to do them. I don't think people were expecting this to be an easy ride. They were probably expecting it not to be such a graphic one. After all, there are so many other books that focus on things like sexual abuse without going into extreme detail.

[@bellacooper7937]

i really love your comment on how this is meant to hurt you and push you to the brink and if you put it down it almost validates jude’s belief that if he tells people they will leave him. i really love this book but always wondering was it just hanya yanigahara trying to drag us until we just couldn’t take it anymore but this really changed my view on this idea and it was really well thought out. this was a beautiful review

[@RickMacDonnell]

I’m so happy to have helped, Bella 😊 Thanks so much for watching. This was such a lovey comment!

[@drawntostories5940]

A Little Life has been all over the place here in Finland for the past month or so. Why? Because, as you might be aware, Finland kicked Canada's ass in Ice Hockey World Championship and won gold. The goalkeeper, Kevin Lankinen, is an avid reader, and he mentioned he was reading A Little Life. So, as a result, ice hockey fans and their mothers all around Finland wanted to read the book. Bookstores ran out of copies, library queues became enormous. Probably a common graduation gift as well this year. Currently the Finnish translation of the novel is a top seller and there was a need for a reprint to meet the demand. Pretty much all the country is reading A Little Life at the moment! Imagine hundreds of ice hockey fans (mostly men) with this book in their hands, turned into readers by the goalkeeper's recommendation.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Did you really have to rub it in that Finland whooped us in the final? LOL. But seriously, that's so cool! Glad to see an athlete using his platform to contribute to the reading community. That almost never happens. Very cool story, thanks for letting me know. (And congrats on the Gold. I always love the Finland teams. Perennial underdogs, but you're always so good. The camaraderie is fantastic.)

[@Limet91]

@@RickMacDonnell That's the reason why i read that book and it hit me hard. It was the best book i have read and gave me inspiration read more books.

[@lindescherrenburg8092]

the worst thing about this book for me was after the book, I had no clue what to read next and was so stuck. i felt like nothing i could possibly read would live up to this book. honestly I'm still stuck and i still feel like this😂

[@aaaarish]

Omggg I so recognise this feeling!!! I felt this when I read THE SONG OF ACHILLES, when I read A THOUSAND SPLENDID SUNS, when I read Dan Brown's ORIGIN back in 2017 and after reading each of his books (I had read all his work before that and I feel so sad about how he hasn't written anything after ORIGIN)

[@comicback]

I finished ALL a few days ago and weirdly enough I’ve started reading Trainspotting- the bizarre and messed up things that happen in it are less heavy and destroying than ALL, so far anyway. I’ve never seen the movie but have had the book for ages and I actually felt compelled to pick it up after finishing ALL

[@austinanderson4196]

I both love and hate the tragic conclusion after spending 800 pages making a strong connection with Jude is that sometimes the people who most deserve happy endings just simply don't get them. And I only hate it because of the physical pain I felt reading the last few pages and learning how Jude's story ended. I've never had a book cause me to genuinely sob into my pillow, and I still can't think about this book without tearing up.

[@Cuyt24]

it wasn't that sad

[@didashinobi]

One of greatest book review about “A Little Life” I ‘ve ever seen. Thank you!

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks, Dida! Means a lot.

[@sarahno899]

"You seriously wanted more about JB?! That guy sucked!" - This is so true haha. I'm so perplexed by how people I have seen talk about how much JB sucked.

[@Liz-iu5lx]

Sarah No To be honest I think JB was the most realistic character, and that’s why so many people hated him. He is what all of us are ashamed of admitting which is selfishness, arrogance, impulse, regret. But also sensitivity, art. I wanted to punch him in the face,hug him, and I really liked him because he’s a mirror to all of us, telling us to be better.

[@14sakuya26]

@@Liz-iu5lx yeah same i could see myself being JB. In that 4 group of friends, he was the clown, the entertainer. a privileged person (as many of us are) among people who grew up with very very little (Jude and Wilem). he even admitted to doing drugs because he wanted to make himself seem interesting. how many of us have wanted to be interesting? like jude said, being able to question life's purpose is a privilege in some sense, and i feel many readers hated JB because he was a realistic portray of themselves as opposed to Jude who had to contain any selfish, impulsive emotion due to his trauma.

[@annerittwage1401]

@@Liz-iu5lx We all know a JB.

[@annerittwage1401]

@@14sakuya26 I saw myself more in Jude. But we tend to judge in others what we most judge within ourselves. That's why I think that Jude and JB are way more similar than we think.

[@shaymoe7044]

I think the reason people liked this book so much in particular is because we are all hurting and in pain deep down. It kinda resonates with our own selves and we are too afraid to talk about it. So in a way this was an ode to ourselves

[@whatpageareyouon]

What’s always struck me about this book is its constant defense and demonstration of friendship. This book, to me, was constantly always trying to ask the reader why we see friendship as sacred, when, if you think about it, friendship doesn’t necessarily have the societal impact or merits that romantic relationships have. I know people say A Little Life is “the great gay novel” but I honestly have no idea why. As you point out Jude and Willem’s relationship here, I too love it, but I didn’t see it as the defining part of the book. I especially loved what you said concerning JB and Malcom’s overall impact, I agree that their being in and out of the story is intentional to allow Jude the choices of friendship, and not to take even his friendship with them for granted. Because friendship....it’s so tricky. There can be betrayal as we know from Jude’s past based on someone he thought he could trust, but there’s also so much warmth, especially in such private and pivotal scenes. Two of my favorite scenes, which is maybe why I keep coming back to this book every year for the past 3 1/2 years: - When Jude sees JB’s, “Willem looking at Jude” - And of course, the ending! How Jude ends with the optimism of about to tell Harold a story, something like “well, it all started one night on a roof...” and I think, possibly, it might have been the happiest Jude has been in the story when he’s about to tell that story-it emphasizes how we all always fall into the ease and access to our memories and why we love stories and storytelling, I think. ANYWAYS lol, great thoughts Rick. It made me want to reread the book very soon : )

[@RickMacDonnell]

I know what you mean about the "great gay novel" thing. I'm certainly not opposed to it being that, but I didn't really see it that way either. It was more about love and friendship, to me, than specifically gay love and friendship. I can't believe you read this book every year. Wow. That's asking a lot of yourself, emotionally. You're much braver than I am LOL. Thanks for the kind words and the awesome comments. Always love to see a long comment. I'm glad you stuck with me for 25 minutes :P

[@user-zl4md9ti6j]

omg. the part where you mentioned that the book ended by jude telling a happy story from the first chapters when he was with his closest friends, i think that was when he was the happiest as well. it does make sense as why the book ended with that memory, 1- to recognize that jude and willem being together is not the turning point of the story nor the magical cure to jude. and 2- that friendship is superior. he was the happiest back then, surrounded by his longest, dearest friends. genius. ❤️

[@renaissauce9516]

SPOILER ALERT I actually liked the fact that Willem became Jude's romantic partner without the sex. Had Jude never endured the abuse he did, he would've been able date in a conventional way. He spoke of loneliness and wanting to feel the intimate touch of another person. When Willem stroked his brows while they lay in bed, he liked it because it wasn't sexual, but intimate. Having Jude's needs fulfilled without the sex might not be fulfilling for us since we're used to conventional relationship models, but to him, it was exactly what he wanted. Willem and Jude's friendship felt like a marriage to me from the beginning. Their devotion to each other made the relationship transition feel natural to me. The fact that Willem gave up sex with him, and always covered for him by, for example, saying they're in an open relationship to make him feel normal, was absolute soulmate behavior.

[@Cuyt24]

I don't think Jude was gay. He probably could have sex with a woman. Gay sex repulsed him. He was afraid of Harold unzipping in his pants. Willem was supposed to be straight but he also bi and wanted painful sex but he was lonely so he accepted it but he just wanted friendship.

[@idontplayislay9439]

I am glad that ,at least, there was another soul that truely felt a glimpse of hope during that moment when Jude cried and cried ,for everything. For a moment, I felt that Jude had taken his very first step to recovery. But then again, the story took another acute curve. Nontheless, it has been one of the most magnificent, yet devastating novels I've read in quite a while; and Rick, yours is unmistakably the most honest and thorough review I've ever read on the internet about A Little Life.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thank for such a kind comment. What a great way to start my day :) I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[@fourizereviews5123]

Spoiler Warning! Great review! I finished the book yesterday and just feel so drained and brokenhearted. It's always hard finishing a great book and saying goodbye to characters you love, but I can't describe how hard it was reading the last two pages knowing that Jude had already left the book's world while I was still reading it. I completely agree with what you said about needing someone to talk about the book with. It's been so hard trying to articulate to friends and family why this book affected me the way it did. So thank you for your wonderful review!

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thank you for such a wonderful message. Glad to hear the book has affected you so strongly, but feeling empathetic for the second-hand pain you're now in LOL. This book is such a doozy.

[@naomimills2549]

You have solidified my feelings for this book, I thought for a while I must of been wrong to find it so powerful and amazing when there are so many reviews saying she cannot write, when that is simply not true and you summed it up in one video so thank you 💛

[@RickMacDonnell]

Naomi Mills People saying that she cannot write are just lazily admitting the content isn’t for them and they don’t know how to articulate it. She can clearly write. I’m so glad you enjoyed the video, Naomi! Hopefully it helped sort out some of your feelings 😊

[@marybishop6105]

People said she can’t write?!?!?!!!!

[@zoenavapanich4299]

this is my favorite video about a little life

[@RickMacDonnell]

Awww, I'm so glad! It's one of my favourites that I've made, for sure. Thanks for watching!

[@xneenz]

19:47 ugh my favorite moment in the entire book! That’s when I broke.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Same :(

[@marybishop6105]

Omg me too. The grilled cheese with the crusts cut off and to think he has never had that 😭

[@mollymurphy6017]

A beautiful reaction. This book became my favorite of all time the second I closed the book. It’s been two months and I haven’t spent a day not thinking about this story. The love in my heart for Willem and Jude feels so real because we got to know them on such a deep personal level. I agree so much with you about how the traumatizing moments aren’t what the story is about. The story is about the people and who they are. I don’t think I will ever find another book that impacts me like this.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks so much for watching, Molly! And for sharing your story. I think everyone who feels touched by this book feels like it becomes a part of them somehow. I'll certainly never forget the book, that's for sure.

[@jaystarcam]

I finished a little life today, I feel so empty and it broke my heart and soul I cried so so hard for so long and there’s hasn’t been a single moment today where it wasn’t on my mind. A 5 star read and my favourite book

[@lettie8259]

What i liked most about the book was the fact in some places I found myself thinking, 'wouldn't it just be easier if Jude killed himself?'. I thought the author was very clever to put you into Jude's thought process like that, because although I loved him, I found myself viewing him as he viewed himself; a burden to others.

[@annerittwage1401]

Just wanted to point out that Hanya Yanagihara might have "done this to Jude", but his actions are very much in line with how somebody with a history of severe trauma would act in terms of finding a partner and whatnot. I feel like how it ended was always how it should have ended. This is how many people with trauma expect it to end, and it did. Spoiler: He wouldn't have left Willem. But ultimately if Willem would have broke it off with Jude officially, Jude would have killed himself as well. Once he's in a relationship it's hard for him to actually break up and be his own person, because he doesn't know who he is. He doesn't care to know. He only cares to survive/ for this person. But once Willem was dead there was no actual point in living anymore. I get it, I totally understand it. The light in his life was out and he no longer had any direction.

[@ginac.6567]

I just started reading this book and i dont have anyone to talk about it with! My family and friends dont read books, so i guess im going through this emotional roller coaster all alone :'(

[@kateharrison8203]

Mee too :( I started today My Christmas isn’t the same

[@megandavis8098]

I’m also reading it!

[@marshallmurmeltier8929]

Same!! I never wanted to talk about a book more than this one

[@majestycrush]

Me neither! I can't wait to meet someone who has read this book lol

[@jena4284]

i feel you. ive read all the tweets and pins and cried in my bathroom and on my walks and now im crying again with everyones' reading vlogs

[@anshitamehrotra]

The BEST review on this book, one I didn't know I needed. Finished it an hour ago. I will never forget Jude.

[@sarahno899]

Wow this is so articulate; you managed to encapsulate the exact same thoughts I had on the novel. I loved this story and appreciated the talent behind it. This is exactly the review I needed to watch because you helped me understand my own thoughts and feelings that I couldn't quite put into words. I've never seen one of your videos before, but you just gained a new subscriber! Looking forward to catching up on your other content :)

[@RickMacDonnell]

Wow, Sarah! This is so nice to hear. I needed to hear it, honestly. Helps remind me why I spend the time doing this, haha. I'm glad I was able to express some of the things you were haven't a hard time getting across. Happy you loved the book!

[@PHLgrrl]

My god, this was brilliant. Your review perfectly addressed all the weight I've been carrying in my heart since I read A Little Life. This book will affect me for the rest of my life and I feel like Jude and Willem are a part of me now. Your review was what I didn't realize I needed to help process this. It affected me so deeply that I feel mad and insulted when I read about people who didn't love it. I don't know if I can ever read the book again, but I will definitely watch your video over and over. Thank you so much.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Charity, this was so sweet! Thanks so much for such a lovely comment. Very much appreciated :) To be honest, very few books "stay" with me longer than a couple of weeks, and A Little Life has managed to stay with me for years. And like you, I'm sure it'll stay a lot longer than that. Thanks for watching!

[@crystal7893]

I loved this book so much. But I do truly wish they dove more into JBs drug addiction. I was okay with Malcom turning into a background character, only bringing him up to grow judes story. But it felt weird setting up this whole storyline for JB and then just never mentioning it again. It could have been a great story line. I feel like it could have even helped to grow judes story as well

[@h.a3971]

After I finished the book I watched almost every review on youtube and every reading vlogs but this one is easily THE BEST review you said everything end expressed my thoughts and feelings thank you and looking forward to more reviews from you

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thank you so much! This was so lovely. Made my day 😊

[@HardcoverHearts]

As with you, I am so glad I read this but will not revisit it. I binged it on the weekend after it was released. You aren’t kidding about needing to talk this out. My husband would walk past me as I am on the couch, sobbing uncontrollably, asking, “Baby- why are you doing this to yourself?!” I can say that this book changed me more than any other book has in my life. Until that point, I had been one of those people who felt that friendships are sacred and that anything can be solved with those bonds. It was only through experiencing friendship and it’s limits through Jude’s eyes that I saw how there are things that good intentions, deep bonds and love can’t solve or fix. It also made me realize that we ask/demand so much from those who are suffering. And I mean deep suffering. All the platitudes and positive thinking mantras we foist upon them when we have little clue the true levels of pain they are dealing with at any given point. The romance we have with pushing through suffering is sick, when seen through Jude’s eyes. It made me finally respect each individual’s journey as theirs to navigate, in a way I never had before. The thing that makes me so upset when dealing with people saying these things could never happen so often to one person is how they don’t see the predator/prey aspect to what she is laying out. Predators can see people who have been damaged in the past. Caleb recognizes Jude’s defense mechanisms and knew exactly how to manipulate them. I know people who have escaped abusive homes to move to SF to find freedom to only be re-victimized over and over again. It happens. And it’s horrible that it becomes so commonplace with some people that it’s more familiar than kindness and love. I could go on forever but this is one book that I will say that I love but can not recommend to others. They need to come to it of their own calling, and not be ashamed to put it down if it’s too close to home or triggering. I think it’s a marvel. Great video.

[@RickMacDonnell]

This is one of my favourite comments ever :) Your thoughts on the predator/prey aspect are sooooo insightful. Really glad you brought that up. People who've suffered can tend to attract more suffering (whether they choose it or not). And don't get me started on Caleb. I wanted to kill that motherf@$%@% more than any character ever I think. I also love that you brought up the "romance" of pushing through trauma or illness or what have you. My brother was extremely sick for about 12 years and the amount of people who got tired of watching him struggle was staggering. It's so much more complicated to deal with when you're in it. Thanks so much, again, for the wonderful comment! Lots to think about.

[@hyanchichou7179]

The last point you made in the review I feel connected with that so much. It’s horrifying to see that in real life when you were betrayed by someone close as a child, it’s very possible that you’re not going to find another person to fully trust in your adult life. And the consequences of that is something unimaginable for people who suffering from that daily.

[@danielasmaniotto3289]

OMG finally someone who shares my view of this book. i'm so tired of people execrating it because of the violence, the sadness and the trauma. it is inarguably sad, painfull, heartbreaking, soulcrushing, even, and it's also such a beautifully written essay about "our" generation, about love, friendship, loneliness, about growing old, about finding meaning. i'm reading for the second time and i absolutelly adore it. it has so many layers of interpretations, it's endless.

[@BookishTexan]

Really like what you said about the review that suggested that "victimization" was about the new status of victimhood. I havent read the book, but now I want to. I might wait till I'm sure I'm in solid place emotionally.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Oh god yes. If you're feeling remotely fragile, don't even bother.

[@graceyang9607]

because i'm a miserable person who still has not gotten over this book, even after three years, i am back on the internet scouring for reviews and discussions as i start to reread it. your thoughts were illuminating and i especially agreed with the first point you made. why do we constantly share this book even though it's not an easy read? because the emotions it awakens in us are hard to deal with alone. we are all jude, to some and any degree, and we are all simultaneously his friends. we deal with trauma ourselves, but we also listen to others. this book is a mirror of our social lives. so thank you for that reminder before i go sob my eyes out again.

[@sarahfolger5232]

Omygosh. 1st time viewer here. Rick, I love your review and thoughts. I wear my "Jude&JB&Willem&Malcolm" t-shirt in hopes that someday I'll meet someone who understands it. I imagine we would just look at eachother & say "yeah, we went through that."

[@RickMacDonnell]

Covid times would be an unfortunate time to run into a person with that shirt on because my reflex would be to run over and give them a hug LOL. Thanks for watching the video, Sarah! And for leaving such a sweet comment. It's very very appreciated :)

[@rachelballa5822]

Thank you for being so raw and authentic - I needed that

[@GabrielaZucoloto]

What a wonderful review! I finished this book a month ago and I still haven't been able to move on. It become one of my favourite books. A masterpiece!

[@jessaboutbooks7799]

WOW, dude, this video! When I bought this book years ago I looked all over youtube for a video that would be helpful in any way with information about the book, its story, or the reading experience and I couldn't find one that had in depth information or discussion that I was looking for! THIS IS IT. Not only do I love your approach to the "review" video as "a thoughts on this book" structure and see the benefit of doing it that way, I thought that all your thoughts were so well articulated and added value to the book and the discussion! Number 6, damn.... picking up this book much more sooner than I anticipated because of this video! Can't wait for other books in this series!

[@RickMacDonnell]

Jess! Thanks so much, this was such a lovely comment. I'm SO glad that point 6 resonated with you. That's the most important part of the video, I think. That was the part that I really wanted to talk about. So I'm very happy to see it land :) I hope you enjoy the book, but yeah, be aware of the excruciating journey you're going on. It's not always easy, but it CAN be rewarding (for some people). If you don't jive with it, that's okay too. It just doesn't work for some people and that's perfectly fine. 100% understand it. But if you like it, please let me know! I'd love to chat more about it.

[@em8842]

I read this book a week ago, the last 220 pages I read in one setting (a MISTAKE), and I cried and cried and cried. It was weirdly cathartic even with how emotionally exhausted I was by then. It was the most violently upsetting reading experience I've had, it was absolutely relentless and crushing, and I completely agree with you that that is the point. I haven't stopped thinking about it since I put it down, I resonated with it deeply. I loved it.

[@mimikenzie27]

Completely agree that I was so invested in Jude and Willem's friendship that it seemed off/forced that they became romantic. Really great review! You captured a bunch of thoughts I had while reading

[@RickMacDonnell]

RaisinBrann Thanks! Great username 😂

[@AddinaWitsqa]

i love how openminded and openhearted you are. this video gained you a subscriber.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Aww, thank you for watching! Your comment made my day :)

[@alenakirby8311]

Yes! This is the discussion I needed upon finishing A Little Life. Thank you!

[@margaret4641]

I read this book as a teenager and I felt completely lost. I couldn’t tell my friends about it because we were young and, though I am an extremely experienced reader and could handle it, they could not. I couldn’t tell my parents because they would have been mad at me for reading a book like that. And I felt a loneliness that I never really had before, because I knew a life (albeit fictional) that desperately needed help and I could do nothing. The powerlessness and loneliness of not being able to help someone or even talk to others about it became nearly tangible by reading this book. It’s a feeling that millions of people must feel about the real world every day. I never regretted reading it because I absolutely love the writing and I was glad I read it but, man, it was a rough time for a while.

You should feel proud of yourself ( in a good way ) of wanting to help.

[@loganblake7048]

I love this book and have thought a lot about it and have talked a lot about it with people, yet you raised so many points I had never even thought of. Bravo! Subscribed!

[@egrojarom3846]

Such a good review, as you said I read this book by myself and I had no one to talk about it and the only output I would find is book reviews videos. The thing of a little life is that almost no one likes it and I loved it. So hearing you speak so positively about it was so refreshing. I feel exactly the same as you do! Such a good book, never in my life a book has hurt me so much and taught me even more! Thanks fore your review! I definitely will hit the subscribe button!

[@artkitty344]

One of my favorite reviews , you described everything perfectly

[@veronikapekarkova4091]

And imagine me reading it four times :DDD and definitely not for the last time. And I had no one to share it with when I read it for the first time :D Anyway - great video :D

[@RickMacDonnell]

FOUR TIMES? I couldn't imagine :P

[@egrojarom3846]

definitely is a book I will revisit at least once a year, the characters feel so alive in my head is incredible

[@GypsyEyes]

this was beautiful. thank you for voicing what i couldnt.

[@arifaristiana2525]

IM SOOOOO HAPPY I FIND THIS CHANNEL YES YES YES can't wait for the weekend for me to binge your videos

[@jesscavazos]

I love your thoughts on this book. I’m going to start reading it shortly and looking at book reviews. This is the most insightful video I’ve come across.

[@samosborn-kemp9056]

I loved this video a lot, it really made me think about some quotes that led me to understand Jude, and then made me think about why they were so significant. Your 13th thought made me think of possibly the first quote in the book that completely floored me and revealed so much about Jude's life and his thinking, which was "Not having sex: it was one of the best things about being an adult." Since sex is often seen as something you are supposed to enjoy, a freedom that comes with being an adult, it is so telling that his freedom is the lack of it because of his childhood. Your video made me revisit that quote and think about its importance. Great video!

[@NoaPit04]

I just finished reading the book yesterday and had to see what others had to say about it. So first of all I have to say that I really loved your review and you are so sensitive and honest. Second of all I think that this book really shows that some people's lives are actually this bad and there is nothing anyone can do to save them, we can only ease the pain. It's hard to acknowledge the fact that things can be this bad for people around us and we might not even know. I am grateful for the face that we live in an area where mental illnesses and trauma of any kind is talked about and I hope we will reach the point where no one will be ashamed of his trauma. I know he is a fictional character but I actually love Jude and hope no one will ever go through anything like this. ❤️

[@soumyasharma9662]

wow! now that's a wholesome analysis. thank you Rick!

[@twentyfly9428]

Also, it’s good to see the male perspective on this incredible legend of a book!

[@pr97192]

Yes! Yes! Yes! I agree with everything you said. This is the first book that actually punched the air out of me. It just...really changes your outlook on life. And that is so SO rare, yanagihara really created a classic

[@MichaelRomeoTalksBooks]

What an awesome review. You nailed it. I've been looking for words to explain to people what reading this book is like and I keep falling short. Now I will probably just link them to this video. Very well done.

[@oyster17ful]

Hi Rick. Thank you so much for your intelligent and insightful review of A Little Life. I really enjoyed listening to and watching your video. I too ADORED this book even though I now feel like I'm suffering from PTSD! When I finished the book I felt completely bereft....the characterisation was exceptional. Jude was such an extraordinary person wasn't he? To have experienced all that he did in his early life and then go onto such success in his professional capacity was, in itself, heartbreaking and inspirational. And yes, JB was an idiot! But this only further reinforced Jude's generosity of heart as to how he forgave him for his malice. I watched an interview with the author and when asked why she chose to write this novel, she said that she wanted to show what happens to someone who doesn't improve, what happens where situations aren't reconciled. I thought this was one of the most interesting things about this book. Although Jude found Harold and Willem, he never totally recovered from what happened to him. And, although that was gutwrenching and so upsetting, it was probably a very realistic take on the situation. How could anyone ever recover from that? My ONLY very small criticism of this book is the improbable success of the 4 friends' careers, which didn't seem completely plausible to me. I would be interested to hear your thoughts on this.

[@nc375]

This is literally the most well thought review I've ever seen for this book. Thank you!!

[@RickMacDonnell]

That means a lot. Thanks so much!

[@nc375]

@@RickMacDonnell anytime :)

[@aditiswork]

what a wonderful review! you articulated your thoughts in such a brilliant manner :)

[@melissaberges702]

I just finished it now and I am literally sobbing. 😣😩. Masterpiece.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Emotionally devastating.

[@antoniamontebruno4405]

this is the best review i have seen of the book, thanks for you putting everything i thought into words

[@marissabookblog]

This was the best review I've seen on this book! Completely agree with everything you said. This book was the most beautiful piece of work I've ever read.

[@bjornbolinder7366]

I love your review. It helps me understand better why I appreciated so many aspects of this book in spite of its profound sadness and darkness. Thank you.

[@amanda-vm7wv]

hi! this review was incredible. i read this book in a day, because i knew that if i knew that there was more that jude would have to endure in this book, i wouldn’t be able to live without thinking about everything. this book destroyed me. i’m only 16, and i think that somewhere in my undeveloped mind i held onto the hope that jude would realize that asking for help would make him less of the burden that he perceives himself to be (by the way, it tore my heart apart to see jude doing so much to help other people so that they would never think this way of him. he never realized his innate value to the people around him), and more importantly, bring relief to his suffering. but i also simultaneously knew that hope was just like the hope that he had for his legs: it would never get better; it would probably only get worse. because that isn’t who he is, his trauma has built him to never expose himself to anyone again, he is terrified of being vulnerable, and so he tests relationships so that he knows what he did if people leave him. i was incredibly frustrated with this dynamic, but i knew why, and this is where i saw yanagihara’s genius. but what absolutely destroyed me is that when the person he truly trusted was taken away from him, jude knew that it wasn’t his fault. he couldn’t have done anything about it. and he feels like he has to deal with it on his own; he doesn’t want anyone to capitalize on his vulnerability, and the last person he could talk to is gone. that is when he truly feels like he has lost his grip on the world, he can’t do anything to control anything in his life. anyway, it would be great if i could have a chat with someone bout this book. as i said, im quite young and i constantly debate whether i was too young to have read this or not. i don’t have anyone to talk to about this as none of my friends have read it and i’m not going to ask them to. but simmering in my own thoughts simply makes me relive this sadness and i really think that i need to let it go.

[@SpaghettyBabyNoodleBoy]

This is the most beautiful book I’ve ever read. I was reading all the suffering and sadness and.. I was enjoying it so much! Hanya Yanagihara has a beautiful prose.

[@shethewriter]

This is one of the more thoughtful reviews of this book, thank you for sharing. Still figuring out how I feel about it, it is sad, but it’s also life-affirming in some ways-like Andy says, Jude wants to feel like his life, no matter how traumatic, is still a life. And she shows how is really was a life. I personally don’t love the very end, and that we weren’t with him in that moment. Still thinking about it. People also forget that some of the most beautiful parts of the novel are not about Jude at all. She paints portraits of love, friendship, grief and joy. The novel is so rich.

[@elenaristevska1226]

best review of the book i've seen, closest to my own opinions, i'm very glad i found it! liked, subscribed and i trust you for my book recs now :)

[@mehmeh1608]

Thank you for your insightful review!

[@aliciatorralba3621]

What an amazing review. Thank you 🩵

[@northern_soul]

The best review of this book!! Thank you 🙏🙏

[@JasmineReads]

YES. This. Is. So. Good. Thank you for this video and sharing all your thoughts so well! I completely agree with your points - I was nodding all the way through. Its such a complex book. But I found it to be amazing. One of the most powerful reading experiences I've ever had!

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks, Jasmine! I know you loved that book, and I really value your opinion, so this comment means a lot. It really is a lot more complex than *some* people give it credit for. I honestly could have talked for twice this long, easily. The first cut of the video was actually 45 minutes LOL

[@Lillia2908]

Thanks for posting this video. This book really hit me hard and your review covered the majority of my thoughts about it. I often look up reviews on books I’ve read but normally I skip through video reviews without bothering to watch all of it. This time I watched to the end because you put into words a lot of thoughts I had whilst reading it and you made me recall a lot of the feelings I experienced even I thought it’s been months.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Glad you enjoyed it. I don't think any review can fully sum up what this book does to a person, but I tried my best. I know what you mean when you talk about the things you've been feeling "for months." This is a book that does not go faintly into the night.

[@Ines-wx2ig]

so glad someone articulated what I thought about the book as well as people's reactions to it

[@mariehullis4342]

I am 3 years late finding your review but the algorithm pushed it because I have been consumed by A Little Life - the book and I was lucky to see the play adaptation currently being stage in London last week. I just wanted to say that I truly appreciated your review, you articulated so much of how I felt about it.

[@inkedantivirus6469]

Wow, thank you. This was already a novel I was sure would stick with me for the rest of my life. This just reconfirmed that. I've never looked at it from an intellectual perspective on this level, but now I can.

[@shirleydocken331]

Thank you for your review. I loved this book when I read it several years ago. Never has a book continued to stay with me. I have viewed several Hanya Yanigahara's interviews on KZbin and I found your review outstanding. I found myself tearing up at some of your quotes from her book that still resonate with me. After A Little Life, I read People in the Trees and am looking forward to her 3rd book which I heard will be out early next year. Thanks again.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Shirley, thank you so much! It’s always such a pleasure to share this book with people. Feels like we’re in a bit of a club. We’ve gone through this collective experience together, but separately 😊 Your comment made me smile. Thank you for that.

[@Akon848484]

Brilliant, brilliant comment! So glad I came over here after some little more than boring Italian reviews. And your point 12 was so touching

[@nandhapalanidorai7103]

I stumbled upon your video by chance. I just finished 'A little life' and was trying to look out for reviews & vlogs. I love how you've made detailed notes of certains feelings that I've tried to articulate within myself. Thanking you for giving a voice to those feelings! An overall great review!

[@bookishsabrina]

Your discussion was fantastic, and it really reminded me of why this book is one of my all-time favorites. I love that I keep thinking new things about it, and finding new things to love, almost four years after reading it.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks, Sabrina 😊 I don’t envy anyone the journey of going through this book twice, haha, but I wish you luck. You obviously know what you’re getting into!

[@hetimothy9199]

This is a beautiful review of a very important book. Finished the book around the same time last year, and truly this is a book that stays with you and haunts you for the rest of your life. It's never been as cathartic as any reading experience I'd been through. It is beyond me that some people would say that this book is not believable or too over the top. I hope people can get past their own lived experience and be empathetic of all other different lives being lived, that's beyond our imagination and understanding of pain and grief. I love how Hanya mentioned this in one of her interviews, 'Any life is as big, or as small, as any other. And that was it!'

[@RickMacDonnell]

I can understand people railing against the unbelievability of it, at least at first. It does take quite a bit of empathy and open-mindedness to comprehend a life that's THIS horrible, I think. Especially if you haven't lived anything close to this. But by the end I would have hoped, with the entire scope of the story, that it starts to make sense why Hanya went as far as she did. But yeah ... this isn't a novel for everyone, and that's okay. Not everyone can comes to terms with it, and that doesn't bother me. It's a lot, I get it.

[@livia3315]

oh this was a beautiful recount on the book i just finished it a few days ago and hearing your feelings about it really was perfect in expressing my own thoughts of this book

[@melanieandbookstacks]

Hi. I just stumbled across your channel when I typed in “reviews of A Little Life” which just happens to be favourite book. Thank you for the best review I’ve seen of it and I look forward to watching some more of your videos. Melanie.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Mama loves * Books Thanks so much, Melanie! That really means a lot. This was was one of my favourite videos to make, so I’m happy it resonated with you. This was such a lovely comment, thank you for taking the time. 🙂

[@pikalamp7723]

This is hands down the best review and analyses of this book and man i watched so many of it. Thanks for an interesting and engaging talk i felt i was sitting at the book club meeting. I think it is my first ever youtube comment ( at least i dont remember one i made before)

[@marlenaeva3813]

I live with trauma and I know exactly what Jude feels. You can't accept love because you think, at one point in the relationship something will happen in this person's mind and he'll turn into a monster and destroy you. There are people like that who will put up a front (great, charming, sweet) but deep down are narcissists and all they will want is to use and abuse you. So, after many relationships with these horrible types it's almost impossible to believe people are NOT like that, they don't turn into something terrible. Jude is very realistic as a character hit by trauma. Thanks for this video. I've watched many videos about this book, my obsession with it is through the roof :)

[@joecleveland2338]

Outstanding review. I read the novel when it first came out and then again this year. I was devastated both times. YES-- there were times when I felt "STOP-- I cannot take any more of this!" Your observation that feeling this way makes the reader feel the way Jude's friend felt was brilliant. The experiences of reading this novel will always be with me.

[@traceymills1628]

This is such a fantastic review. I never had anyone to discuss this with when I read it a few years ago as I didn’t want to recommend it to anyone. It is the most impactful book I have ever read. It lifted reading to a place I didn’t realise it could go. It made me see the world differently and people’s pain differently. Thank you for your passionate discussion.

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks Tracey! That's so nice of you. I feel bad that you didn't have anyone to talk to about the book. That feels like a must for me, haha. The book really made me analyze what I knew about other people's pain. Especially long-term, self-inflicted pain. So grueling.

[@ohmyoswald]

This was such a great review of the book!

[@timkelehan5147]

Really enjoyed this video. Great job. You summed up a lot of my feelings about this book as well. There are multiple videos of interviews with her that really gave me insight to her thought process, her ideas etc while writing this. I read the book about 4 or 5 years ago, and I STILL think of it often....

[@sintumolefe1918]

I absolutely LOVED this book. I finished it a few weeks ago, and I am still not over it. And your analysis is very important for people to understand why it is such a good book. I agree with what you have said. When I was rating this book, I was trying to look for faults, and I couldn't. I read this knowing it would be painful, how could I fault the writer for doing what I expected her to do? It definitely became my favourite book.

[@izzyjohnson8516]

This is an excellent review ! Very insightful :)

[@twentyfly9428]

Your review is perfect! You made me want to read this book! I’m subscribed now!

[@saraiish]

Loved this review helped me process some of my feelings about this book

[@mxxpower]

This is the best review of a little life i’ve ever watched. I agree with literally everything said. A Little Life is my favourite book, the writing is so beautiful and I love all the filler and the intense descriptions of Jude’s pain. It’s real, some trauma never fades from your life and it impacts you forever. Can’t get mad about that. Edit: I also hate how people say the book is poorly written. I’m getting a few quotes from the book tattooed on my body, I want to read those words every day. I can’t get over them.

[@robee9289]

Thank you for this beautiful review. You just put in words my thoughts. And when you said you have written many quotes in a notebook, I dropped a tear of happiness, because I am doing the same. I have read this book in English and I'm going to re-read it in Italian. It's definitely a masterpiece. Thank you again. Greetings from Italy. :)

[@renepierre9074]

Ugh, hearing your thoughts on this book made me want to re read it so badly. I loved what you said about turning some characters into back ground characters, I honestly can't believe there are people out there that put that under bad writing rather than character development. This video brought up so many memories! Thanks for the best "review" on A Little Life i have watched! x

[@RickMacDonnell]

Thanks, Rene! That's ridiculously high praise, I'm honoured :) Have you re-read the book before? I can't imagine going through this again. You're braver than I am, haha.

[@Keibro]

I loved your thoughts on Little Life man. It clearly had a profound effect on you and I found myself agreeing with a lot of your observations x

[@stantonspencer9659]

I was one of the people who read this book without a support group or people to share it with, that’s what made this video so awesome because everything you said I just completely agree with. So bone achingly sad but so so so important and amazing

[@mariamelgallad7358]

This is such a beautiful review