I’m 57. No kids. No wife. Drinking wine out of a Burger King cup. I am still trying to pick up women at local sports bars and getting rejected. Going home alone every night. Watching Tim Dillon videos on KZbin. Life in the big city.
@NoNippleNarc5 жыл бұрын
PJ Stone not likely
@Cuyt245 жыл бұрын
GraNOLAbar I paid for a prostitute last week and she took one look at me when she arrived at my house and said no. I’m just a giant blob of fat, sweat and hair. If I lost 100 pounds I would still be 300 pounds. I don’t blame her. I’m a loser. My step dad was right. The single life right? I was going to get married but I broke it off because I thought I would have unlimited supply of pussy. That dried up after the first 30 pound weight gain back in 07. Sigh. Life in the big city. Enjoy! Yes!
@Vmh17174 жыл бұрын
Lol this dude can’t be real
@roymakescomics4 жыл бұрын
@@Vmh1717 nah, he's clearly riffing and trying to do a bit in the style of Tim, but not as funny, the material is too similar.
@saraforney39404 жыл бұрын
I’d turn a trick with you. No funny business tho. Ya can’t beat me up or anything & you’d need a condom. I haven’t whored in maybe three years but you’re pulling at my heart strings
@drgonzo19715 жыл бұрын
I love that Better Help still pays for these ads
@eskimointhisworld4 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂🤣
@asopher4 жыл бұрын
They know the mentally depraved listen to Tim Dillon. It’s a win win 🤣
@juneack58484 жыл бұрын
The fact that they are mentioned in the comments means its working! They are still sponsors btw.
@exzisd4 жыл бұрын
I actually listen to the ads. They are hilarious and I've actually THOUGHT about signing up for it went to the page and everything but in quarantine I'm a broke boy.
@theflowerhead4 жыл бұрын
@@asopher That's so disturbing. 😅 Love it. 👌
@anonymousconflict2881 Жыл бұрын
Good god these classic Tim Dillon episodes are absolute gold 😭
@AJValentine-uc3pi2 жыл бұрын
I love this battle Tim's having with the crazy woman yelling in the bushes, unaware of the fact that he's the exact same person but he's got a microphone.
@paulfroelich10242 жыл бұрын
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
@FrenchCanadianGuy2 жыл бұрын
Oh, he knows
@DannySullivanMusic Жыл бұрын
haha dude niiice
@chuckn4851 Жыл бұрын
Oh he definitely knew, that's why he kept doing it lol
@LadyDemo9 ай бұрын
That's all I kept thinking 😂 Maybe she heard him first and she's down there talking shit about him and hollering and howling thrashing bushes and limbs to act bigger and louder 😂😂😂 HE has driven HER insane..
@travis20505 жыл бұрын
"better help is better than nothing" lmao
@MrsLady-jt4qt5 жыл бұрын
Travis I died
@mysticalpineapple72634 жыл бұрын
😭😭😩
@robinjoy27894 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣
@colleenlally-ross71053 жыл бұрын
Hard ti believe, I still can't stop laughing 😝
@jg24082 жыл бұрын
This was a special time. Fall of 2019 Tim Dillon was on absolute fire. Never has been and never will be a better podcast.
@yasamanmansoori27892 жыл бұрын
I’ve gone back to watch these for the first time and they’re incredible. It’s too early to say he peaked here but they’re DAMN good nevertheless
@TheSandwich42 жыл бұрын
go see him live he is amazing
@milesbeler39742 жыл бұрын
Try the archived episode "Pizza Hut Buffet" or especially "Fat Gay Santa"he was WILD between episodes 10-30!
@yasamanmansoori27892 жыл бұрын
@@milesbeler3974 thanks!! Firing them up now
@yasamanmansoori27892 жыл бұрын
@@milesbeler3974 wait, are these on his Patreon? I’m not subscribed and they’re not on KZbin. Maybe it’s time to pay 😭
@Daingerous15 жыл бұрын
Woke up drunk at 5:30 and made a drink and then saw this just dropped. Life in the Big City.
@PT-tv9my5 жыл бұрын
I got into a road rage incident and ran over a cyclist. Life in the big city
@ewokcardewas32204 жыл бұрын
@@PT-tv9my just saw 2 people smoking crack right outside my window life in the big city
@P1xi3_74 жыл бұрын
Life in the Big City is one of the best ones.
@closer20jc4 жыл бұрын
Just stepped over human shit...life in the big city
@sublimelove233 жыл бұрын
just railed a line of blow in my cubicle. life in the big city.
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
“In LA they have silent retreats and yoga, in the northeast we have FUNERALS!” LMFAO
@colleenlally-ross71053 жыл бұрын
It's funny AND true! We just buried my cousin and saw everyone, ate great food and felt happy to be alive.
@BlekJamal Жыл бұрын
@@colleenlally-ross7105 How long was Ol' Cousin Jimmy on the junk before it took her?
@Aaryan-936 ай бұрын
If that's your photo . You're hella cute.
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
The ONLY place on the interwebs where I get excited for an advertisement!
@pread74915 жыл бұрын
Stellar Celeste him and a channel called internet historian actually have entertaining ads.... it’s the way to do them tbh
@T.I.M.Thirteen5 жыл бұрын
Stellar Celeste When he said he only has one Better Help ad left, I thought they must have finally listened to his reads. Lol
@flyingstump29385 жыл бұрын
Uncle Joey's ads are good as well
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
comixbrainz zzz But in all honesty, the ONLY time I’ve even considered going to Better Help is BECAUSE of Tim’s ads... Better Help NEEDS Tim Dillon.
@bullmoosemedia3 жыл бұрын
His ad reads are more hilarious than most people/"comics" Netflix specials.
@frogfroggyfrog28332 жыл бұрын
This is Tim Dillon golden era. Have listened this episode about 15 times. A fucking classic
@matthewstone13622 жыл бұрын
I'm also back to soak this in once more.
@ryanp69992 жыл бұрын
@@matthewstone1362 samesies
@frwystr7 ай бұрын
miss the good old days
@Waveydriver5 ай бұрын
@@frwystrI can’t even listen to the new ep’s. These old ones are so good
@frwystr5 ай бұрын
@@Waveydriver yeah new ones arw not even worth tuning into sorry piggy
@mattstiglic4 жыл бұрын
My productivity at work has plummeted since discovering Tim's show. Its the funniest fucking thing I've ever heard.
@bleedlejuice5 жыл бұрын
"Is she allowed?... it's too dark to tell, thankfully "😂😂😂
@nowic1tj3 жыл бұрын
When my Uncle Tommy died unexpectedly of a massive heart attack at a young age, our family was really torn up to say the least, the first 45 min of the showing no one spoke, just crying and sobbing uncontrollably, death was strangling the room. Enter my Uncle Bill, observes the situation and looks to me and my cousins and says , "I don't even know what I'm doing here, he isn't coming to my funeral." To hear 80 people go from sobs to a laughing fit was a beautiful thing.
@CatnamedMittens Жыл бұрын
Fucking hilarious
@Stoney-Jacksman11 ай бұрын
your 'uncle' bill is a hack and youre an id-iot
@ShaneMclane-PrivateEye Жыл бұрын
I was addicted to heroin and eventually fentanyl for years up until may 5th of this year. I got hit by a 2001 BMW going 50 mph and woke up a month later. Another month of learning to walk again and im out of the hospital. So if your struggling with opiate addiction and cant quit, just get hit by a car, if you live through it you come out clean... it sucked crapping in a bed pan and having a nurse wipe my ass for over a month but it sure beats being dope sick in the Santa Ana central jail. No brainer.
@bradleythebuilder87439 ай бұрын
Brah, that’s fucking righteous dude. I was in your same boat except I didn’t get hit by a car and it took me ten years of fits and starts to finally actually quit. You are the man, I hope you are doing well and loving life. Good luck my guy
@BLK_MN9 ай бұрын
Life in the big city.
@rawn92348 ай бұрын
Big city living
@frwystr7 ай бұрын
im glad the year of the car was included
@Kzander-ne4yw6 ай бұрын
Hey dude are ya still clean or relapsed? Hello from Poland!
@theguythatcould3 жыл бұрын
What I love about this show is that you can go back and watch the older stuff and still funny.
@TheSpeakeasily10 ай бұрын
I always come back to this episode. This was peak Tim Dillon.
@skreign8 ай бұрын
It's in the favorites playlist for sure
@MrTYLA135 жыл бұрын
The fact that better help pays for an ad like this is just fantastic, brilliant work Tim
@jeanbabtisteclamence30185 жыл бұрын
Tim Dillon is a fucking lighthouse of clarity, sanity and mother fucking exacting honesty. A palate cleanser, in a world that desperately needs one.
@edwardchowanes77165 жыл бұрын
Which Patreon tier gets me access to the bushes next door so I can yell during the next episode?
@sealevelbear5 жыл бұрын
A bag of plasma a month
@briang93864 жыл бұрын
The Epstein tier
@portlandgoose47273 жыл бұрын
Presenting him Hilary Clinton's head impaled on a stake would probably do the trick for Timmy
@LadyDemo9 ай бұрын
Yes!!!😂
@cg57015 жыл бұрын
Crazy lady in the bushes thrashing around.......... life in the big city.
@ericloyd63184 жыл бұрын
Joyce Rey
@ICUP5703 жыл бұрын
100% accurate
@Vmh17174 жыл бұрын
This dude captures the north east so well. It’s so so hilarious
@jamezdean113 Жыл бұрын
I come back and watch these porch episodes in important moments of life. Helps me to reflect
@Maizyspringer5 жыл бұрын
Judge: you’re still looking at 40 years Tekashi: you can flank the Spartans if you take this goat path
@segamegadrive39035 жыл бұрын
XD
@BlastinRope4 жыл бұрын
Kek
@kingheart95554 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂
@alexleonard90524 жыл бұрын
Unforgivable
@gabelogan564 ай бұрын
Back here in 2024. Vintage Dillon is evergreen.
@THEG4MINGLEGEND5 жыл бұрын
Underrated comedian Underrated podcast I'm sure you will make it soon Much love from Saudi Arabia !
@T.I.M.Thirteen5 жыл бұрын
Naif MS He’s “made it” already by being one of the best to ever hold a mic, it’s only a matter of time before the rest of the world realizes it.
@blazedandconfused4775 жыл бұрын
Mate, can't you get your people to fund Tim so he can subvert the US government and media more effectively? I feel like there's a lot of potential here.
@MasterTrickShot5 жыл бұрын
Blazed and Confused glad somebody said it. There’s a hell of an opportunity here. Eventually get him in the Trump 2028 cabinet too. If it’s hell I want hell with a splash of excitement
@bev_buntu46745 жыл бұрын
@@blazedandconfused477 they throw people like Tim off of buildings in his country
@blazedandconfused4775 жыл бұрын
@@bev_buntu4674 So how about, instead of throwing him off a rooftop, throw him at your enemies.
@tamhas4 жыл бұрын
I just wanted to say thank you. I've burned through your videos in the last couple months and it's helped keep me sane. Thank you for the laughs. "Little rona'" was the best video of 2020 imho
Looking skinny from that alcohol sugar diarrhea. Proud of you Tim.
@JackNoman5 жыл бұрын
stevia is the healthiest artifical sweetener and it's actually way better for u than any other sugar substitute
@OffGridInvestor4 жыл бұрын
@@JackNoman you're right. I grew stevia and if you get a leaf and dry it for 3 days THEN sit it on your tounge and gently nibble..... the sweetness nearly blows your head off! It's strange to experience sweetness stronger than sugar.
@OffGridInvestor4 жыл бұрын
I honestly can't even taste the sweetness in erythirol.
@CandyBag2 ай бұрын
Didnt age well
@joshlockie92855 жыл бұрын
Better Help wants to get rid of Tim but since he’s their main source for clients they’re going to let it ride.
@joanna9856 Жыл бұрын
😂❤
@scottgilmour83123 жыл бұрын
"I wouldn't advertise a product on this show that wasn't a scam" The honesty speaks to me, shame my fake therapist doesn't
@fastcornbread5 жыл бұрын
The commercials are so ridiculously long. I love it.
@bullmoosemedia3 жыл бұрын
If it is funny, you can say whatever you want. 😎😝
@FUTANTCOLLECTIVE4 жыл бұрын
So sick of Covid I just wanna watch Tim Dillon eps from last year all day
@chrisswinney13195 жыл бұрын
Tim, I can’t thank you enough for the advice. I have been canceling my family members who don’t understand the grind and do not hustle. My life has become better ever since.
@pancraseash90023 жыл бұрын
Each episode is like a flawless special ? Wow its fucking impressive
@alyssamw062 жыл бұрын
I am dying laughing! This has got to be one of the best episodes EVER!
@bigfoot76885 жыл бұрын
The way this guy does his sponsors are insane lol.
@leorickt.96044 жыл бұрын
Listen to cumtown
@ponderingimbecile47752 жыл бұрын
I wonder if shakeology every advertised again
@MrPeaves014 жыл бұрын
Tim is what happens when a man of the world becomes an American.
@leoncort23442 жыл бұрын
When you're creasing at an advert more than other comedian's thought out comedy - you know Tim is the real authentic deal.
@christianleech57722 жыл бұрын
These are truly the best ever. His new stuff is still good but these are another level
@AngelasAnythingShow4 жыл бұрын
me screaming focaccia and naan in my house for 30 min. and yes unleavened bread is matza. and yes i know this ep is a year old.
@cargocultpod3 жыл бұрын
lmaooo I was screaming baguette
@irabernstein3 жыл бұрын
banana bread!
@mrinfinitemonkeycage56683 жыл бұрын
Yes I know this reply is a year old but it screams Pig fandom
@davidk.84342 жыл бұрын
Matzah is unleavened, but so are tortillas
@ICUP57011 ай бұрын
The best Tim Dillon eps are on the porch.
@adanbravo47223 жыл бұрын
I’m sure somebody already said this but Tim’s love for funerals is straight out of Fight Club
@kushfrancis373 жыл бұрын
Tim paints with words as do all the greats.
@billytitus151911 ай бұрын
Please get back together.
@BLK_MN9 ай бұрын
Cry more. Go watch Ben's podcast if you love him so much.
@frwystr7 ай бұрын
@@BLK_MNdont be so angry
@LazyRare4 ай бұрын
True
@grantguillemette8132 ай бұрын
Never going to happen bud
@streakingclothedАй бұрын
What happened?
@johnnydubz32962 жыл бұрын
As someone who watches to mutch Tim Dillon the funeral bit gets me every time
@andthenwhat96037 ай бұрын
I always start my day with a td podcast. It's honestly the only way i can get going since i can't have oxys anymore
@monk.on.a.hillsideАй бұрын
Hope you’re doing well and staying clean
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
Tim looking like a whole (Keto friendly) snack!
@madsketcher4 жыл бұрын
Get your grubby convict hands off of my Keto Torpedo!
@theonlyguiltymaninshawshan79093 жыл бұрын
Tim's right. Funerals ARE great. One a month would be ideal for my needs.
@ross766811 ай бұрын
Going back to watch Tim Dillon episodes is the best entertainment you’ll ever have Absolute comedy gold and it doesn’t matter a fecken iota what year it is Absolute genius 👏
@bradleykyle64935 жыл бұрын
🤣 Just watched 2 bears 1 cave, they spent 20min talking about different peanut butter.
@AlexanderStoinis2 жыл бұрын
Little did we know, but this was the best Tim of all time.
@brencelt4 жыл бұрын
Producer Ben is hilarious as a straight man to TDs crazy rants 🔥❤️
@graydays7105 жыл бұрын
Feeling so great for Tim. Looking great racking up a quick 15k KZbin views. Crushing it
@michaelhallen28083 жыл бұрын
My Mom was a Tupperware lady. Wasn't exactly a scam,but her almost religious fervor for quality plastic containers was rather strange.
@valve_is_better2942 жыл бұрын
Can only picture my dad’s funeral and wake, this episode helps me reflect sometimes
@CedricWilliams675 жыл бұрын
Just recently discovered the Tim Dillon from tin foil. Holy hell he is hilarious. About to go on a dillon binge.
@Ziguly5 ай бұрын
This is one of the best podcast in the history of podcasts ever
@professionalpacktaxer7 ай бұрын
just started peeping this podcast, always heard of tim dillon saying crazy wild shit but wouldnt think it would be gettin me thru the day at my early ass job at 5am😂appreciate you bro
@jamesmurphy85305 жыл бұрын
You look thin what have you been doing? “Take a seat”
@airsign10124 жыл бұрын
1:13:57 I'll allow it, I'm not thrilled with it.." 😂
@jeffmckone79384 ай бұрын
I literally looked at this comment right as he said it. Bread sticks.. What a basic bitch 😂
@CH-ml4rz5 жыл бұрын
PERFECT TIMING. Good morning from Denmark
@rayn_0ff5 жыл бұрын
Yep perfect timing for Europe ☕
@Daingerous15 жыл бұрын
Jensen here, much love you Scandi
@vdr38463 жыл бұрын
I thought I was the only one who felt this way about funerals.
@Tfwd18913 жыл бұрын
I grew up on the island n parents always talked about the “Van” always had my head on a swivel playing outside😂😂😂
@SeaOrcRonnie5 жыл бұрын
Could you imagine Tim trying to recruit you for beach body? I'd shut up through the whole pitch just to hear him talk.
@patsansone89714 жыл бұрын
One of my fav episodes with Tim randomly ranting about some obnoxious woman yelling the n word lol
@keepgrindingup7661Ай бұрын
@34:41 that Better Help ad .. he's at his best
@BostonBlues5 жыл бұрын
The whole time I was screaming banana bread
@adamgardener86243 жыл бұрын
I have been listening to these so much lately that now the voice in my head sounds like Tim's voice.
@paulfroelich10244 жыл бұрын
"Only for snitching" that's a great description of social media.
@TheRealJDC3 жыл бұрын
Tim: "I don't even *like* sourdough" Ben: *shakes head*
@WilliamWetlipsfromWisconsin5 ай бұрын
Underrated comment
@nerdcity4 жыл бұрын
Was the bread-off the keto version of forcing a cellmate to tell you dirty stories?
@elektrotehnik943 жыл бұрын
@PREMED Organic chemistry tf is the video?
@brolo4784 Жыл бұрын
@ 25:30 that hit hard cuz I’ve actually done that and thought about how hard the music is hitting with a Snapple in hand… creepy
@dirtdirtdirtiest96074 жыл бұрын
Me screaming at the screen during the bread-off "NAAN. NAAN.NAAN BREAD."
@AngryAmerican1776 Жыл бұрын
My cat has alot of wisdom in his face, therefore, he's better than staring at the wall. I learned this today, thanks Tim
@howhigh05213 жыл бұрын
I would love to see Tim’s heart rate during these podcasts 😂
@gnarleygnarlington5 жыл бұрын
Timmy!! You look glowing!!!! Keep it up man. We need you.
@burnsplasticbags043 жыл бұрын
It’s great to see Jeffrey Dahmer has gone on to have a pretty successful career as a producer for this show.
@E-Nigma_2 жыл бұрын
The accuracy.
@karlwithakcomedy3 жыл бұрын
1:11:00 Did Tim almost predict the capitol building breech? 😂
@sublimelove233 жыл бұрын
Lets be honest, it was a long time coming, and im shocked it never happened before
@flying_rat3 жыл бұрын
Tim Dillon predicted everything
@Irrationalhumanity5 ай бұрын
Old Tim was the best. The rage was real
@lizbrauer33744 жыл бұрын
with covid, I have the luxury of watching Timmy all day long, between diarrhea and vomiting
@johnmcleod49214 жыл бұрын
You make a broken sole actuly feel laughter thanks tim
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
Can I book you to speak at my funeral?
@ProfessorImbakeXBoomshaka5 жыл бұрын
To show you're serious you have to disown someone you love
@WitzyZed5 жыл бұрын
“I’m not saying it’s good! It’s *bad*.. It’s very sad, life is.. a meaningless nightmare”
@stellar77605 жыл бұрын
G G I’m actually introducing Shakeology to my family this weekend...
@jameswieczorek42394 жыл бұрын
Stellar Celeste what an excellent idea.
@nerdelf37043 жыл бұрын
One of the greatest episodes
@blakem0005 жыл бұрын
"The point is I have contempt for all you, and I should just start doing garbage!"
@zugzwang7425 жыл бұрын
Ben makes me happy.
@kalijuri3 жыл бұрын
i find myself watching old podcasts. free from tyranny talk. it is so nice to be back in time when the world was just regular fucked up and conversations were wide and fun.
@OpethTheater33 жыл бұрын
You can run, but you can’t hide
@kalijuri3 жыл бұрын
@@OpethTheater3 i don't hide from cocksuckers. i am sovereign.
@ArticulateDegenerate8 ай бұрын
2024 and looking for almost anything pre-2020
@martinimanz5024 жыл бұрын
Dude I just started doing a deep dive on this pod. I like this old co-host!!!! Timmy the trashcan roasting him is the most hilarious thing ever!!! New co-host is okay... But I thought this chemistry was better. Love you Tim Dillon, I'm an overnight vet tech and you've helped me through hard times, buddy. Keep it keto brother. You probably won't read this
@saltyapostle444 жыл бұрын
The best co-host in the business. Perfectly matched.
@lst97013 жыл бұрын
The bread naming competition is actually great, im gonna use that whenever i cant think of anything to say
@asgardpictures3 жыл бұрын
I'm 12 years older than Tim Dillon and still remember as a kid the van stories from my Long Island youth. Except it was a blue van in the very early 80's. Had a classmate that insisted she saw a kid get murdered in their driveway by the van guy. Hilarious.
@P1xi3_74 жыл бұрын
I listen to your show even when I’m walking in public and always burst out laughing...
@airsign10124 жыл бұрын
Anyone else catch the 'mybookie' ad spliced in just around 12:39 - 12:40 - I'm kind of impressed they're employing subliminal methods of suggestion in a podcast like they used to do to sell soda before a film's start at a movie theater
@freebased17803 жыл бұрын
I just commented " what is this fucking MK ULTRA"
@sethveetaker54743 ай бұрын
"It's better than nothing or staring at a cat." Significant pause* "Maybe not all cats. Some of them kind of have wisdom in their face." That's the most underrated Tim D line ever. I wasn't going to sign up for better help, but now I will.
@truerambler3 жыл бұрын
Ben received a thrashing on this on. The one thing I will say, the kid is tougher than most of the listeners 😂
@xandermander60352 жыл бұрын
Tim taking mini-breaks to yell at the lady across the way is one of the funniest things I’ve ever witnessed😂😂 like 9:55
@ZachAttack2U Жыл бұрын
That better health ad was the best advert I have ever heard!!! @34:46 to 42:01 🤣
@smithrosco3 күн бұрын
For sure the porch era was the best. Goes without saying. But what the thing here is, now that I'm listening to them all again doordashing again drinking in Philly, I must say that this particular episode is f-ing pure gold. This episode is one of the best podcasts ever recorded! Really making my night 🎉
@scottdavis44394 жыл бұрын
Could you imagine sitting across from this guy during an interview? "So, what experience do you have in xyz?" "Well.... (90 minutes later). But you know, let me really tell ya about...."
@dnbjedi3 жыл бұрын
Artificial sugars absolutely destroy me. Lactose is pretty rough too but I have some once a week. It didn’t used to be that way-- but I did look into it and it may come from drinking alcohol causing a problem with digestion.
@ryrynoel2 жыл бұрын
I honestly want just a compilation of Tim’s sponsored ads. He needs the Clio award
@georgecrisci54402 жыл бұрын
This Bread Off in my earphones at work is the best thing I have in my life right now with only NEGATIVE $2.25 in my bank account