5 Red Flags You Need to Watch Out For When Dating

[@Psych2go]

ATTN. Does anyone recognize something different about the voice for this video? Would you like to hear more? Comment if yes.

[@funkidgenius]

Yes

[@EzBound]

Yes

[@funkidgenius]

It’s the accent 1st of all and the voice actor is different

[@Project_415]

Yes

[@catalina1816]

yes I like it but I like the original voice the best!

[@cartonriley]

1) *They criticise you, either subtly or passive agressively* 2) *They're rude to staff and waiters* 3) *They act irresponsibly and their behaviour is immature* 4) *They describe **_every_** one of their exes as 'Crazy'* 5) *They don't communicate or express their feelings about the relationship*

[@selinaou]

6) They have you pay for literally EVERYTHING 7) They demand ONLY expensive stuff (Gold diggers)

[@chibi_okami]

My partner is 1 and 5, I'm 3 😔

[@pantsenfuego9986]

Constructive criticism is acceptable

[@thepersonwhoasked8396]

What if they are sarcastic? Like they sarcastically say things like “y/n is an idiot” knowing that it won’t really hurt you because you and them have a good relationship

[@nerdeel]

@@selinaou 8)they threaten you to do things 9)they do not respect your boundaries or consent at all.

[@blissvful]

I’m currently crushing on someone right now, but I’m afraid that they might not be the “best” one. Thank you for making this!

[@sango8755]

Ahh... Don't worry! Try it out if not you'll find someone better😁❤️

[@smegul1464]

Just do it man you need to get over the thoughts and start living

[@Psych2go]

Hope all works out! Always go with your gut feelings cause those usually are telling you something you don't yet want to accept.

[@EnaroGenaroX]

Well... You can try to know them better and if you feel that they are not best for you, you can stop knowing each other. I'm gonna share a recent personal experience if this perspective can help you think about it: I had a crush on a girl. I flirted with her and she was kind of responsive to it, but she never communicated with me and never flirted back to me. We talked a lot (when she wanted to talk) but conversations never went too deep and sometimes she stopped listening to me. I thought she was the "one", but just thinking of her made me really anxious and I didn't knew why until I realized that I was feeling left behind by her. I don't know if she was interested in me to be more than a friend, but she never tried to give me yes or no signals. So finally, I let her go because I wasn't feeling ok with her and I was the one trying to keep the communication alive.

[@solonada9602]

What must be borne in mind is that, before declaring a relationship with someone whom you are fond of, you must ensure that you share at least a single common interest with that person. Because otherwise, if there is huge discrepancy between your and your partner's interests, then you are bound to get into constant conflict and quarrels. Which is something you would definitely not desire to undergo, hence it is vital to establish with your partner the unifying force of common interest which brings the light of fidelity to the couple. Therefore, inquire that person for their interests, so as to ensure the camaraderie that keeps you both united.

[@mangomango9682]

Another red flag: mirroring. It's when they don't reveal any of their own interests or opinions and just repeat everything you say and pretend they like it too/agree 100% with everything you say, to seem like you're soulmates/have such an *amazing* and *supernatural* connection. It's a type of love-bombing and toxic people use it to hook you in quickly.

[@CalledHigher-ib8ce]

Isn't that being called being unselfish?

[@mangomango9682]

@@CalledHigher-ib8ce I get what you mean but there's a difference - respecting other people's opinions is a great thing but if you ask this kind of person about their interests and hobbies, they won't say anything in particular, but then when you say yours, they'll suddenly be like 'oh my god I love that too!' at *everything* you say. Or they will always agree with you about everything - they don't express their true feelings, they pretend to be the same as you, mirroring, to make you feel flattered and good about yourself so you can be abused later on. Mind you, only toxic people do these sorts of things, and if someone agrees with you on some things or you have some common interests, that's great. It becomes a problem when they seem to be the same as you in *every* way. But they will only do this to ppl they think are naive enough to believe it i.e. usually people-pleasers, shy, under confident etc. Here's a link which explains love bombing signs, including mirroring, better: www.garbo.io/blog/love-bombing

[@justadude117X]

i think thats better described as mimickry. emotional mirroring is actually extremely healthy in relationships. its what securely attached people do. its when you openly, honestly and directly talk about whats wrong and then your partner meets you where youre at emotionally and validates it.

[@CalledHigher-ib8ce]

@@mangomango9682 I see your point

[@mangomango9682]

@@CalledHigher-ib8ce yeah it's a fine line between healthy connection and toxicity, but the good thing is that channels like Psych2Go are describing different types of red flags so that people can be less vulnerable to being abused later on in a relationship

[@richardparker2555]

6. They're moving to quickly. Have you only been dating for a short time but she/he is already talking about meeting your parents, having kids, marriage ext? Or are they simply trying to pressure you into getting more physical before you're ready? If so thats a bad sign.

[@troximetal]

This. In my experiences, guys move insanely fast pretending they want to commit and have a serious relationship, but it's only to get into my pants. When they realize they won't get it, they leave.

[@brownleonard8921]

Okay I understand moving too fast to become physical, but can you explain why talking about marriage and stuff like that is a red flag? I just got in a relationship last month and she occasionally talks about marriage and related stuff, although it’s a bit weird, I just thought it shows signs of maturity..

[@bsinita_wokeone]

@no chains no more I hate those types of men I run away from them

[@cats9994]

@@brownleonard8921 if the convo feels one-sided I'd say it's likely not of the best of intentions. If you've genuinely talked to them about wanting a long-term relationship I wouldnt see it as problematic

[@rosesyrup1104]

That could be a purely cultural difference. Some cultures don't even have the dating stage and go straight to marriage, so interracial couples may have different opinions on what is "too fast".

[@juliuscaesart]

#4 is HUGE and #5 or they downplay their past mistakes, they’re usually not completely honest with themselves. Any combination of these will be potential fatal problems in the future. If they’re not honest with themselves, how can they be honest with others?

[@Psych2go]

Yes. If they can't own up to themselves, chances are you are going to get blame for a lot of things that happen later on.

[@troximetal]

Thiiiissss

[@aomccaskill81]

How (and how much) they talk about exes is a huge indicator of whether or not they're a good fit for a long term relationship. In addition to saying that all of their exes are crazy, if they talk about an ex too much, they likely haven't processed out their previous relationship, they're carrying around a lot of emotional baggage from that relationship, and you could end up being the one used to process out that relationship. That's hugely unfair to you, since you had no part of that relationship, and depending on the severity, can even be traumatic ( vicarious trauma). If they talk about an ex too much, they're probably sharing very intimate details about this relationship very casually, this is an indicator that they have serious boundary issues and likely won't honor and respect your boundaries. I married a woman who did all of the above, and if it weren't for my daughter, Id consider that decision the biggest mistake of my life.

[@juliuscaesart]

@@aomccaskill81 Sorry to hear man… was in the exact same situation minus the marriage, thought I loved this girl but dodged a HUGE bullet. One of the biggest life lessons ever.

[@GetYourLifeBetter]

Not all relationships make our lives better. Some relationships aren't good for us. They damage our well-being instead of making it better. Some can even be toxic, and it’s important to recognize the red flags. Red flags in the early stages of dating can be subtle or obvious. If a red flag appears more than once, it’s important to take note before the relationship goes too far.

[@Psych2go]

Very well said. This could literally be our video description!

[@kuychi]

0:48 They criticise you, subtly or passive aggressively 1:46 They're rude to staff and waiters 2:36 They're irresponsible and immature 3:25 They describe every one of their exes as "crazy" 4:01 They don't communicate with you or express how they feel in the relationship

[@demon.that.draws777]

I feel like it should be included that healthy or constructive criticism is different and can be extremely helpful by maybe pointing out problems your partner didn't even know they had of course, with the intention of them bettering themselves for them and helping if they need it. Especially since people absolutely blow ass at accepting criticism these days, pointing out problems is the first step in solving them, it's not intended to be a threat all the time, sometimes someone just genuinely wants to help you.

[@gnarthdarkanen7464]

The major difference between constructive and destructive criticism is that constructive criticism comes with suggestions to HELP RESOLVE the issues that seem to be the "problem"... Basically, instead of "You suck at cooking." Which would be destructive... The CONstructive form would be, "Maybe turn the stove down a notch or two when you're frying the eggs. If the oil's too hot it makes that crusty brown stuff around the edge of the whites... and we both kinda hate that." ... OR some similar tips... just edge them along with bite-sized coaching. DON'T FORGET to show some approval and compliment when they make progress, either! AND a lot of the time, if you're not asked for critique, just don't... Sometimes any advice will be taken as bad advice, but you'll learn along the way when someone (you're around a lot) is receptive to some helpful coaching or advice... the odd pro-tip or two. ;o)

[@EmArilus]

I was just about to point that out

[@demon.that.draws777]

@@gnarthdarkanen7464 yes, thank you for the emphasis on the differences between critiquing and just harsh judgement. A good way to start off constructive help is to ask if they want help, but sometimes people's egos are too big, in that case, sometimes I'll just leave a note with some sort of instruction an explanation for a why I'm leaving it here. A lot of people suck at even looking at themselves constructively, tough love is kind of my thing I don't like BS

[@gnarthdarkanen7464]

@@demon.that.draws777 Thanks for noticing... I just think it's doubly helpful to explain a healthy constructive criticism from the destructive stuff... First, it helps those who might struggle with thinking "All I can do just isn't good enough" when they get a tip or advice, even from someone they care about... They can learn that if help is being offered, it doesn't mean whatever they did was horrible or useless. It's just help, because it might improve something or just make the effort easier for them. At the same time, it ALSO helps those who want to help their S.O. or close friends, because they know there's easier or better ways to do something, but they're used to pointing out the problem first and don't always think of just offering a solution or suggestion in the first place. Relationship conversations aren't always the best place for a dramatic effect or suspense... That's not to say there can't also be TACT, without beating around the bush or avoiding a direct answer. It's just using appropriate language for the issue at hand... not always the sarcastic over or under statement for emotional emphasis. ;o)

[@Psych2go]

true!

[@starletjoachim4580]

The only relationship you can always fully trust is with yourself.

[@MoistDelta.]

@alliara not necessarily

[@mystic_topaz6783]

Lol I barely even know myself

[@Psych2go]

good point!

[@BrendaVanem]

If they are super nice to waiter & staff/random people, it doesnt mean automatically that they are nice/respectful to you. If anything it shows that they are great actors. Seen this theory fail numerous times sadly.

[@Psych2go]

Yes, that point is not 100% accurate. Would have to agree with you on that. Sometimes, it could all just be a show too. It's more important to see how they interact with their family and close ones.

[@ririzamel285]

@@georgesas7090 thats true, but lets not also forget our brothers and sisters who are experiencing abuse in the family.(abusive family) Things arent always what they seem and its hard to judge so quicky. its best if we see things from a bigger lens and perspective.

[@ririzamel285]

@@georgesas7090 You are right and i agree, but judgement is also getting beyond bias and rooting out prejudice as these may cloud right judgement.

[@KitsunoIRL]

Currently watching this, and while my relationship doesn't hit all of the red flags, I'm surprised to noticed the ones it does hit... I feel the time to discuss the state of our relationship to my partner may be approaching, and I'm nervous of how it's going to turn out... I love them very much, but after living with them for almost 2 years, I feel we're not putting as much into the relationship as we should be, the both of us.

[@animeevergreenathena]

In that case, I’d say that it’s okay to be honest as long as your honesty is backed by truth and politeness. It’s how couples can learn to grow properly the same way that artists and scientists get honest, but polite feedback for their work. :)

[@Crystals10000]

good luck buddy

[@craftergaming392]

Good luck!

[@shortiejayyy]

I'm kind of in the same boat. and have brought up a few things on a few small occasions, but I feel a bigger, more direct conversation needs to be done. one of my things is 4 and 5. although I don't know if I've caught him in a lie per se but he doesn't tell me everything or wont tell me about a plan that he and others started talking about or I find out once I'm already in the car assuming no plan was made and it'd be just us two

[@lueqmanmasduki6028]

I don't think criticize your partner is a solid red flag. Because some criticism is for improving your partner and for their own good. But theres a way to criticise your partner, it must be done with some suggestion not just pure criticism.

[@sstar339]

Of course, but maybe you should see the explanation they give for having that on as one of the points.

[@avantikabhartiya2053]

Not when your partner says "there are so many beautiful/handsome girls/guys out there but I am with you"

[@lueqmanmasduki6028]

@@avantikabhartiya2053 agreed, saying this can result in insecurities on your partner. Hence why we need to pick a proper words when criticising out he/her

[@Psych2go]

good pov

[@PsychToLight]

One reason red flags can be tricky to identify is that so much else in the relationship could be going well. On top of that, it can be hard to pinpoint what, exactly, is making us feel uncomfortable,

[@ovenbakedbread]

THIS^

[@Psych2go]

true!

[@lenegelbe-hauen9009]

I once went on a first date with a guy at a restaurant once and he really insulted the waitress for misunderstanding his order and serving him the wrong meal. I apologized to her and left as soon as I could as I always try to stay kind, polite and well spoken. These three things are huge priorities to me and he really didn't need to be so rude for one minor mistake 🥲 So yeah, if your date is rude to staff and/or waiters.. Run as fast as you can (:

[@Psych2go]

thanks for sharing this!

[@avidhossanmansur9830]

As a guy, I will share some confessions that I think girls should know when it comes to dating. Most of my points are taken from experiences of other people but a few actually came off my own experience from my past relationships. He doesn’t (or rarely) remember the little but important things that girls squeeze in during conversation every one in a while. As a guy, you have to lack some serious interest on a girl to avoid those cues. He regularly mistaken things you said or things that you never actually said. If the guy tells you he needs to leave the room to answer phone calls, to the point you start realizing that he is, then you have a good reason to question the possibility that there is another girl in his life. If he tells you that he wants sex (not directly) but wants to take the relationship slow (or backstreet). He doesn’t introduce you to his ‘best’ friend. There might be a chance he is embarrass of you or that he is actually gay, no, I’m not joking here, I’ve heard it happen. Whether he is rich or poor, if you’ve been dating for a while and he never offers to pay for your shopping (cheap stuff), hes either a cheapskate or he doesn’t like you that much. If he actually does buy stuff for himself but never pay for you then that’s a massive red flag. If you feel you’re at an advance stage but he has trouble sharing his insecurities or life problems, either his life is so damn perfect or he just doesn’t really trust you. If he never makes the effort to hold your hand or show some kind of intimacy that signals “you’re mine” in front of people, his friends or in public, good chance he doesn’t love you. If you’re in an accident, hurt, or having midlife crisis, and he doesn’t find ways to meet or reach you. This might be obvious, but I’ve seen girls that ignores this and thinks that the guy is just “busy”. He makes tiny cute promises but never makes those tiny cute promises a reality I am not young. I learned from my mistakes over decades. My biggest mistake was to listen to well meaning people tell me to give someone ‘the benefit of the doubt.’ As they say, when people tell you who they are the first time, listen.

[@danisob3633]

I disagree with the shopping part though. It isn't necessarily bad. Maybe from their point of view there's just nothing wrong with paying for the things you buy, which i see natural. Unless the person buying those cant afford it, in which case then measures should be taken.

[@stillirise33]

@Avid Hossan Mansur I agree. Having brothers they have said similar things to be on the lookout for. A few I've noticed is: when he's saying I love you ,talking about kids and marriage already very early on. Forgetting things or saying you never told him when you know you did in turn making you feel crazy because you know you told him but now you're doubting yourself. Wanting to know every single detail of your life and who you're around 24/7(he doesn't care that darn much) Using things you've told him in confidence against you in the midst of an argument then be like "I did it because you made so angry." Or "I was just joking, you're so sensitive. "

[@avidhossanmansur9830]

@@stillirise33, You are on the right path. There are a lot of weirdos out there both women and men. So I think It's smart to be a little skeptical in the beginning before you go all-in. If they turn out to be the right match then great but if they're not (which will be true for most dates) you'd have just dodged a bullet! As for the last point you made "I did it because you made me so angry." these kinds of people are the worst! I know because I've dated multiple women who say things like that. These people will even try to justify murdering someone by saying that they were angry! MAJOR RED FLAG, at least for me!

[@stillirise33]

@@avidhossanmansur9830 You're very right. Both men & women do this. I tend to notice some people use a lot of manipulation to get what they want even some being narcissistic trying to hide it. That among other reasons is why I am very skeptical at the beginning even still after 6 months to a year because I've seen people completely change hands after they get comfortable. And yes I've dodged some serious bullets. I've seen a guy literally tell me "I was just joking. " when he proceeded to try to break me down by calling me psycho & I need help when he knew I had mental health as if I wasn't going to catch on to what he was doing. Yeah that back fired lol. All because he was pissed due to me calling him out on some bs that he thought I wouldn't catch. He went crazy saying all kinds of ugly things while I remained calm then goes haha I was only joking. I was like yeah 😒 we're done here & never looked back.

[@avidhossanmansur9830]

@@stillirise33 Funny, I had a very similar experience about 3 years back with the girl I was with. She would rant for hours, bring up all my past failures, break my stuff, pull her own hair out, and basically push all my buttons if I even did so much as forget to answer one of her messages! And the next day she'd ball her eyes out saying that she was sorry and stuff. But as time went on her tantrums got more and more serious and her apologies went from "Please don't hate me " to "just get over it already". After a year I had enough of this drama and decided that I was better off without her even if I ended up single for the rest of my life. You are correct we shouldn't let our guard down and always keep one eye open for signs of abuse even if its been months. The mistakes I made were falling for her apologies and not taking the poor behaviour seriously early on.

[@erwinlommer197]

Biggest red flag is the constant expectation and entitlement to be entertained and served. You are always the person making things happen, making suggestions, putting in the effort and footing the bill. And the other person just sort of expects to have a good time. Which they then repay or don't. This kind of exchange of gifts and closeness is terribly harmful and poisonous. It is not a relationship. It is a transaction and it is a terrible base to build a relationship on. Not only is there a big power difference but also a huge chance one of the two being taken advantage of. So if someone comes bearing gifts that go way above normal or expects to be entertained and served then those are red flags.

[@Psych2go]

true!

[@bunny-we6xn]

just got broken up with from an almost 2 year relationship that damaged me badly, and recognized a lot of these red flags. especially the 4th point. if someone has like 5 exes, not every single one of them can be crazy

[@Psych2go]

Sorry about this...

[@christianbenn316]

With me i broke off of one after 4 & a 1/2 months so she cross the line by disrespecting me & she left me no other choice but to cut her out of my life so i'm better off without her & she was a total red flag ever.

[@outlinehappiness]

Watching how they treat others, particularly servers, is incredibly telling. It’s easier for a person to keep up a persona with you in the beginning because there is an incentive, they don’t have an incentive to do this with those around you who aren’t connected to you.

[@gecko2023]

As my relationship has been described by two people as a year 8 relationship, im pretty happy with how its going... we both have no prior dating experience so honestly it has been great :D

[@kris7833]

any advice? also was yours long distance or in person?

[@verose23]

Can you please do a video on what is Trauma? ... I know it's very basic but I think most of us don't know the meaning of it which leads to ignorance or self-diagnosis sometimes

[@Psych2go]

Yes, we have some videos here actually: kzbin.info?search_query=trauma++psych2go+ Can you see if any of these resonate with you?

[@vanhearrt]

trauma is completely self diagnosable

[@iamgoddessoflove]

If someone truly wants you, they will show it through actions, how effective their communication is, their vibe, body language and how they treat you. If you have to constantly ask yourself if someone is into you or not, they act hot and cold towards you, then most likely, they're not! 💙KZbinr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

[@theladyamalthea]

I just want to add to this that three common traits of abusers are anger, jealousy, and possessiveness. Definitely Red Flags to watch out for!

[@Psych2go]

yep!

[@animeevergreenathena]

To go along with irresponsibility and immaturity, I will say from experience that if you notice your partner practicing unhealthy habits like smoking, excessive drinking, and dodging conversations on important topics, which kindof goes with lying, like marriage and childcare, even after you tell them honestly and politely how their actions make you feel, then it may be best to move on as sad as it may seem. Granted, we all can’t be perfect, but if the point of a relationship is to feel that one person’s health and well-being is more important than the other, then that’s not a real relationship. That, of course, goes for all different types of relationships. Not just romantic ones.

[@BoBgoesKot]

smoking and excessive drinking are (unhealthy) coping mechanism, thus mostly symptoms of a deeper wound If the person reflected on this wound, knows about it and is on his or her journey to healing, or even is in therapy because of this ...this has 0 to do with irresponsibility or immaturity! your suggesting to straight up leave your partner if they don't know how to already cope in a more healthy way ... you just made the point yourself: "Granted, we all can’t be perfect, but if the point of a relationship is to feel that one person’s health and well-being is more important than the other, then that’s not a real relationship. " Boundaries is the keyword here, yeah in a relationship you should care for yourself and for each other aswell... Dont forget, most ppl search love to feel loved, not to love. dodging conversations is whole nother topic, because this might be stonewalling, immaturity aswell, emotional avoidance, etc.... depends on the context

[@Psych2go]

good point!

[@christianbenn316]

Total red flags

[@milesesprit7601]

I have a few of these red flags. Life is about continual improvement.

[@lunawolfheart336]

Oof I tend to overshare about abusive exes but I feel it's kinda important since there's real trama involved and I think a romantic partner should know what's happening in my brain so they can understand why I'm gaurded sometimes. People say just wait till those relationship don't affect you anymore before daiting again but I think there's a differences between getting over someone and still having trama from one. Idk what a heather way to go about this even is so I just avoid daiting now

[@vecoolgaming]

It's OK to talk about your exes with your new dates, it's a part of you. And your not done with it yet. If your done with it you wouldn't be talking about it. Maybe you're subconsciously telling them what not to do in order to treat you better. Since your mind already know what you don't like in that scenario of a relationship

[@blsmcherry789]

Currently struggling with this in my current relationship. I got cheated on in a previous relationship. It's been a few years since then, but the relapses feel like deep holes. The thing with trauma is that it can be difficult to heal from and it shows up in very surprising ways throughout your personal or dating life. The irrational thoughts are hard to be realistic with... trauma literally changes your mindset. Having your partner understand that and support you is essential. It's tough. I get what you're saying.

[@Nikki.....]

talking about your exes isn't necessarily saying they're all crazy everything is their faults and you were an angel the whole time. as long as it's obvious you're taking responsibility for your part. but generally it's not a good idea to talk about them much maybe once or twice but definitely not regularly.

[@Psych2go]

thx for sharing!

[@ganrimmonim]

On the not expressing emotions. It can take a few people quite a while to fully open up. Even small shows of emotions can be a huge expression of trust and love.

[@thomaslevy2119]

"Kiki's Delivery Service" anime poster is back in the last scene! (One of my favorite animated movies.) Even Ki-ki's relationship with Tom-bo got off to a rough start. Yet, they became the best of friends. If only real life could be so much less complicated and have a happy ending like animated characters get.

[@potates60]

healthy constructive "feedback" with love and care is a green flag. partners who can't accept any negativity about themselves are red flags because that means they lack accountability. derogatory belittling criticism is a no-no

[@Psych2go]

good point!

[@Hermionee-Jean-Granger]

Could you make a video which has some advices or tips regarding moving on from a really toxic long-term close friendship? Like at times it all gets so overwhelming that I find myself drifting back towards it. Ik they hurt me over the years fully knowing what they were doing and didn't stop even when they knew that I knew, but I just can't bring myself to not, not forgive them and dislike them. Our friendship was beautiful at some point but got so toxic over time and I'm still not over it. Umm so yeah.

[@Psych2go]

Hi, sorry to hear that. Moving on definitely takes a lot of time and confidence in the future. We have some videos here: kzbin.info?search_query=how+to+move+on+psych2go+ But we can do a new one too to account more for your situation.

[@lunawolfheart336]

I feel ya I just got out if a toxic friendship were the person was dangerous even. Luckily it wasn't a few years long only a few months but it drained me so bad I'm struggling getting back up

[@ririzamel285]

ever heard of trauma bond? It can happen to Platonic relationship.

[@Hermionee-Jean-Granger]

@@Psych2go Thank you so much, Psych2Go Team. I truly appreciate you folks.💛

[@Hermionee-Jean-Granger]

@@lunawolfheart336 My friendship was of 7 years. It isn't like "officially over" but we both know it's headed downhill. It's just so hard to muster up the strength to go away from someone you've been with for so long. Like Ik they're being toxic af, ik they've done intentional hurtful things I've lost count of and still continuing, ik they're treating me in a way friends for sure don't but I can't simply walk away. Ik I've had enough. But I feel guilty for giving up on this friendship even though there's been nothing to hold on for years in the first place. I'm stuck onto the past memories, hoping things would become like that again. But there's a line which has been crossed long ago, I really need to get that in my head. Though fortunately, I've started to feel somewhat better lately. I do get overwhelmed thinking about all that sometimes but it isn't as frequent as before. I miss them but I ain't going back. Self-respect and self-love are vital. Friendships are bonds which require efforts and care from both sides, it's a mutual thing. People change over time, it's not your responsibility to hold onto a toxic friendship when there's been no efforts of making it better from the other side. I'm gradually understanding this and learning to get over that stuff. I'll be fine. It'll take time, but it'll be worth it. Ah I realised I spilled sm in the flow! I wondering if I should delete the text and write smth shorter! But I'm too lazy rn for that so Im gonna send this anyway.😂💛 If you reached here, tysm💛💛 Take care!!💛

[@KillTheFuture42]

The critique part isn´t very clear to me. The examples you gave sure are, but a critique can be on a much milder level and in good faith. If my partner wouldn´t tell me when i´m about to do a mistake in public or didn´t critique me, if i start to fall in destructive or self destructive patterns, started to drink regularly or do anything harmful and my partner wouldn´t talk to me about it, i would be disappointed. If it´s just emotional abuse that would be another story, but critiques in general doesn´t feel right to me.

[@abstract3213]

There is a huge difference between constructive criticism, that helps you improve, and between a toxic criticism that criticises the person you are, rather than criticising the behavior. Toxic criticism just destroys your self esteem. Constructive criticism has to be given gently and take into account your feelings, while toxic criticism is harsh, nasty, destructive and invalidating, it's purpose is to put you down rather than to raise you up.

[@DestroyerLV-ix8lc]

The other red flags. If she plays mind games with you. She is more likely to cheat on you and not be interested in you. Because the woman who truly loves you will not make things harder for you and she will respect you and won't play with your emotions

[@poeticlovee]

Those two aren’t mutually exclusive

[@marinamedinaa]

She/He, right?

[@diamkn_9776]

"They" & "Person" would sound more inclusive

[@Psych2go]

Good catch! If someone chooses to play mind games with you, imagine all the other games that's coming.

[@Psych2go]

@@diamkn_9776 Good point!

[@BrotherMag]

I notice the last red flag in my last relationship. She went from communicating every day on the phone to handle at all. When asked, she'd say she was going through some things but wouldn't confide in me. I decided to stop talk to her a month later after no change.

[@Psych2go]

good point!

[@BrotherMag]

@@Psych2go thanks! I probably should have done it sooner. 10 years (on and off ) ago I moved from another state to be with her (online relationship) but she kept coming up excuses to not meet and would send me a selfie (no one believed she was real). It has created trust issues to this very day.

[@christianbenn316]

She's not worth your time so cut ties with her & move on

[@christianbenn316]

​@@BrotherMagit's simple block & no contact

[@jm2307]

Many of these are things older people in my extended family do all the time. So when I started dating it wasn’t a red flag to me when it should’ve been. Now I can identify the behavior in them & watch how it wrecks many of their relationships including their relationships with me. I have to keep them at a distance yet can’t explain why to them in a way that they would accept.

[@Psych2go]

generational gap...

[@kristalhumphreys4621]

I’m enjoying the videos this channel releases! I love how informative these videos tend to be

[@Psych2go]

[@kristun216]

I feel there's more nuance to the first one. Not ALL criticisms are bad and certainly not if somebody does it only once or twice. I'm criticising this video because it can lead easily influenced kids to see their relationship as a red flag because someone criticised them.

[@pasqualinamichelaconsiglio9391]

If I may add: number two: they're rude to staff and waiters - it can also go in the opposite direction. A fake, manipulative nice. Trying to trick staff/waiters into getting something for free. And, or flat out state, "The price is how much? You're going to give it to me for free?" Expressed in a jokingly way but really they are not joking. They don't want to take responsibility for paying for something. And, they are trying to bargin, manipulate the person into getting out of something. Like how about my dessert is free? Those types of people will end up dumping everything on your shoulders. From the household chores, to the bills, etc. If you need to go somewhere and want to go join along they only do so if it benefits them.

[@AL_-si8cz]

3:25 I see, huge red flag in my relationship... if he is able to get away with some lies... who knows what else they lie about...

[@vecoolgaming]

Do you tell 100% truth ?

[@deec411]

The men I’ve been involved with have always criticized me. At this point I’ve given up. I’m 58 and have resigned myself to being alone.

[@diewilde13]

That is a precise description of my ex-short term pseudo-relation. Thank god, I cut him off after 10 weeks (that were still kind of waisted)!

[@shadowknight_studios7588]

I'm not ready for another relationship but this video is really helpful just in case

[@zeeshanquadri1]

We're all gonna miss Amanda if replaced... 🙇 To the new VO - Your voice is soft & calm to hear. ❤️ You might have joined newly and I'm sure if you had listened to previous videos, you must be loving Amanda & her voice already. Thanks for coming.🙏 Yeah,the voice sounded lower than usual... But ok,as convenient for you & take your time.

[@JP-dn1ti]

Yesterday, my girlfriend called me "over-dramatic" because I blocked my friend who is toxic and rude.

[@Psych2go]

sorry about this..

[@christianbenn316]

You're right to do it & it's your decision so don't tolerate toxic behaviour from no one

[@dlinehan8230]

Unfortunately yes I have seen it in myself after a 4½ year relationship with a narcissis after I cut ties I got in another relationship before I had healed and I wasn't ready and I ended treating her as I was treated and it went on for 12 years we broke up last year I've done alot of self growth on the last few months I messaged her the other day and we had a great talk (I have custody of our 5yr old daughter) and I explained that I had come to realize how toxic I was and that I was sorry and most important thing I had told her is I wasn't doing this to get her back she had killed those feeling and we are now well as close as friends and it's best for our Daughter

[@Psych2go]

ty for sharing!

[@eyeronthegamer]

OMG. I recently had a "scarred heart" and trying to recover in 2 weeks. Points 3 & 5 highlight my fake crush. I solemnly swear it sucked so hard.

[@OldestDream]

Thank you for making this video. Unfortunately for me it was too late. I was very immature and I couldn't communicate the discomfort I felt to him. I ended up just constantly asking him if he really loved me and ended up hurting him that way. The wound is still fresh and im full of regrets right now. I feel a little selfish for even hoping for a second chance while/after I fix myself.

[@lunawolfheart336]

Sometimes you get all green flags until one day the person randomly throws in a red flag. Hard to know how to react to that situation

[@vecoolgaming]

How you react to something you don't like in general. Either you ignore it or you take it personally and address the situation. Relationships are hard and people are not perfect.

[@moneytime1556]

People fail to take they time to get to know people. Of course people gonna show they good side the first few months but soon thay get comfortable with you , you will see they true colors people can’t fake it forever. Take your time to get to know people. I know looks important but some people got personality disorders and just not relationship material

[@aliciacooper8662]

That's because they start with the love bombing, then the abuse starts when they get comfortable 😔

[@joshuapike643]

@@moneytime1556 wth?? People with personality disorders aren't relationship material? Ableism much?

[@moneytime1556]

@@joshuapike643 huh what do you mean?

[@KazimJafar]

First one needs a little more elaboration. It needs to differentiate between condescending criticism and constructive criticism. While berating your partner is obviously a bad thing but partners help each other grow through constructive criticism.

[@chorideon6760]

Many people do not know these things, these videos are very good.

[@Psych2go]

Glad to see that the videos could be helpful!

[@veralyn7299]

Thank you so much for making this one. I recently broke up with my girlfriend and I feel so guilty and fake about it. but now that I think about it, I'm glad I got out. she was so manipulative. anyways, thank you guys so much. this really helped me!!

[@Psych2go]

you got this!

[@MegaCyberleader]

I absolutely love these. There were days I thought why?!!!!! now I think.. when?

[@paridhiagarwal3335]

For me it's the fifth one and i have like raised concerns about it a lot many times to count but then he just doesn't care enough. And when I want to like break it off, he'd tell me why would I want to and etc. Reall sucks that it is my first relationship and already I'm done with it,

[@MaxContagion]

dang. sounds a lot like someone i lived with for four years. they hit a lot of the points fully. except for the last one. which they mostly hit

[@kyI3br0fl0vsk1]

thank you for teaching me all these life lessons it makes me Learn more about myself whenever i watch one!

[@Psych2go]

[@Blu3b3rrymuffinn]

Thankfully these red flags don’t apply to my relationship. Because I’m single ✨

[@Psych2go]

WOW! Mindblown. lol

[@Blu3b3rrymuffinn]

@@Psych2go Omg hi! I’m a big fan :)

[@sarenap1409]

My boyfriend definitely gave off a red flag with the way he treated fast food/retail workers when we first were together. He definitely gave off a sense of entitlement, and I think that comes from him being a white male, but also taking advantage of his disability (he’s in a wheelchair). I called him out on it, and he didn’t realize he was being rude/entitled. I can gladly say he’s not like that anymore, but anytime I even sense he might do something like that, I remind him before it even happens. But I don’t really have to do that. I think it’s good that he changed, and listened to me. Yet I also know that most of the time, that won’t be the case. I do agree that if you feel uncomfortable in any way with someone, listen to your gut feeling.

[@MyDee817]

It's so shocking when you found out that you have Some of this without noticing it

[@BladeOfTheHero]

It was clear as day the voice changing, also with the small comment about subscribers, or something like that. My co-worker, who's dated other co-workers in her past job experience, well, I've seen her interest in me, and the games she plays now. The biggest red flag I see is that she had at one time lied about going out to eat, where she ate with a higher-up who lived in the building. I noticed this, as I was waiting for my food to arrive, to eat with another co-worker (I have access to CCTV), and noticed she didn't leave the building. The co-worker I ate with mentioned she was eating with the higher-up, which I thought nothing of it, and true enough when she came back to the office and my co-worker said something, she lied. I couldn't help but try to get to the bottom of it and saw that the higher-up left the building, and came back with bags of food to go to the higher-up's apartment. Normally, this isn't a thing, but the person went through the back as if hiding something. Altogether, and the co-worker who "is interested in me" keeps trying to keep me entangled also keeps lying to me after the fact makes me not want to pursue, even though she's 12 years my senior. There's a push-and-pull relationship between us, and I think all of this is due to her lack of human experience. Oh, and though everyone in the office thinks it's weird that I tip on pick-up food I bring to the office for everyone else (I do not include this tip when divvying up the check), she is the first to comment on how strange the behavior is. Not to belabor the point, but are there other red flags we should watch out for?

[@EFJoKeR]

I've noticed, that both my partner and i are often immature, but seeing as we both are, i don't think it's a red flag... We can be mature, when circumstances require us to be, but really... Where's the fun in that... :P

[@Psych2go]

Sounds like you guys have a healthy balance :)

[@LetGaiaLive]

I wish this video came out when I met my ex - she is represented by every single one of these red flags! Hey everyone, subscribe!!

[@Psych2go]

Hope you meet someone amazing! :)

[@LetGaiaLive]

@@Psych2go Thank you very much 😊

[@phnml8440]

I Love the stardew Valley easteregg at 2:26 it’s so awesome ❤️❤️❤️

[@alicec.6195]

6- if they don't have any close friends and all their friendships are superficial. 7- if they have a bad relationship with their family. I don't mean with one or 2 relatives but cutting out their whole family

[@sappiredark]

I gave up communicating when they decided to only understand it from their side.

[@WisteriaWinds]

My relationship has so many red flags and I hate it

[@esmoonieya]

Immature and telling little lies is definitely me. My partner is the one who does not want to communicate but always pointing out my shortcomings. Both is a little bit arrogant in some way but we don’t calling our exes crazy. I want to learn to take critics but if all I’m hearing is hurtful critics, i don’t know what to do. I feel like these red flags are not permanent but if both people are in the reds, its either both will learn or both will never learn.

[@livelearnlove9086]

In him never got to be in a relationship with him thank God I didn't make the mistake. Thank u.

[@mikejarrells431]

Thanks & good job.

[@legendoffupa]

I think the point about criticism needs a bit more nuance. If someone shows up to a date with messy hair or unbrushed teeth, I will surely address it to them, but I will try my best to be respectful about it and keep it between the two of us. The way you worded it in the video, it sounded a bit as if all criticism is inherently bad, yet I think criticism can help us reflect and improve ourselves when it's delivered properly.

[@anthonyp8885]

I wish i noticed this before I got attached. Were already broken up and im heart broken after the things she put me through. But I still love her and it sucks :( Lying really affects things

[@Psych2go]

you got this!

[@LakeGael]

I still don't understand why people think it's OK to be rude to the people who are touching your food.

[@parisnapeblack]

That British accent is everything ✨

[@Psych2go]

hehehe

[@RoboHobo9200]

One red flag would be the excessive mentions of Human Centipede the film and the merits of character design

[@MoistDelta.]

Run!

[@narcsurvivornyc6846]

Wow! I experienced four of the five red flags. I wish I had known this earlier it would have saved me years of pain and heartache.

[@Psych2go]

[@sillycharm]

This describes my roommate and honestly I have started hating her soooo much…. She feels so toxic I literally have a breakdown every other day

[@smiththeinspiringanimator7042]

Awesome and cool!

[@ndrcalrryx2094]

All the guys I dated who called their exes crazy and never took responsibility were the toxic, cheaters, and narcissistic ones, I realized.....Ew.

[@colbecruz2409]

The fact that I’m watching this video is a red flag in itself

[@austinnelson396]

Mood af

[@ketchupisasmoothie]

They don’t ask you questions and only talk about themselves 🚩 🚩 🚩

[@semsmeb9745]

while this was a very informative video, i dont agree on the criticism part. constructive criticism is very important for me and if its exercised well, will bring you further in the relationship and in general. if its done passive-aggressively and from an ego point of view, i agree though

[@miharu9750]

actually no. 2 like to add 1 more victim... not only staffs & waiters but drivers on road as well in my case, that guy kept scolding in his car about other drivers who are slow or a truck didnt make a perfect u-turn or wont dare to cut in line, he kept goin on for quite some times though out the drive... even though its not directly on them but its still rude i find that as a red flag cuz im a slow driver, i might not make a perfect u-turn cuz i never drive a truck b4 & i dun see the need to cut in line due to im not in rush hopefully others dun just pay attention to only these 2 victims as u know... u never know they can hide this side but apply anger on another side

[@melaniemills4505]

Another red flag is if they are estranged from their family or their own children want nothing to do with them...there is most likely a good reason for this. 😒

[@nick27march]

No red flags... I saw only white flags in her eyes.. She is/was my eye candy 🍬🍭

[@Meleeman011]

I can't even imagine dating again, I don't look bad but I don't really know where I could meet people, and half the time I just want to garden or do outdoor stuffs where there aren't people to meet anyway

[@mehish7876]

POV : You are not dating anyone but watching this for (a) friend(s) of yours who is/are dating someone

[@Mony_0207]

I realized that I am in fact,the red flag in my relationship Time to change that!

[@starrynight9999]

I think there can be healthy criticism and unhealthy. I would like to know if my partner feels I am doing something that they feel is not right. Is elf reflect and consider there insight. However, there is definitely unhealthy criticism and my ex displayed unhealthy criticism. I took a job as a barista cause I couldn’t get hired almost anywhere during pandemic and my ex said “you have a masters degree and you’re working as a barista, that’s kind of pathetic.” And “you have masters degree in criminal justice and you don’t know what has happened in the news? That’s sad.” I just thought whoa, maybe I’m being too sensitive…not anymore.

[@undeadstormblade9337]

Yeah but you need to explain the difference between criticism and talking about issues with the relationship. Calling someone out on distance or lack of caring isn't a red flag or toxic, it's necessary conversation

[@tdesq.2463]

LOUDER, Please!!! And, Thank You for raising that point. It's a Biggie! 👍👍👍

[@chrismartin6984]

Yes I have

[@DrFrost1229]

Hmm ok

[@wilderbeast9368]

Happy Super Month. 👩🏿‍🦰

[@OceanMentzer]

Been dating a girl for about a month now, and I don't see any of these, thankfully. That's a good sign, I think.

[@niodium7195]

Idk who the new voice actor is, but i really like the voice. But the original voice is the best, so dont remove it. A good idea could be to keep different voice actors for different types of video topics.

[@uselessvader]

We want More content like this plz.🙏👍😁

[@supermcfly3103]

Damn it... I already failed at number one...my diagnosed narcissist ex criticised me on one of our first dates for my insecurity and me naively still went into a relationship with that human trash... of course all the other signs followed along... well, I learned a lot about humans through this so yeah, I got that going on for me.

[@Psych2go]

you got this!

[@_ok4aii]

literally how would we survive without psych2go 😭 I was wondering if you guys could make a video on the ISFP personality type! Im one but I dont know what sources to trust for some info and not all of my questions are answered at the official site

[@Psych2go]

Yep! We can let the team know about your suggestion! Are you watching any other videos out there on that topic?

[@_ok4aii]

@@Psych2go Thank you! I've watched 2 or 3 but I havent had too much time to watch more yet

[@tm8147]

My partner does this thing when he says "I feel like You *says something horrible about me*" and when i Say that hurted me cause i know I ain't like that he says "well, that's what I feel, but we can work on that" And Idk how to feel, that's what i tought on number 1 of this vídeo

[@sugarpops4227]

He says that you both can work on whatever is causing the problem. I dont think it's a bad thing because he's willing to help find a solution. The worst thing he could do is blame you and not do anything at all

[@taharhammache2481]

The right video at the right Time 🤩🤩🤩

[@socialsilence4896]

I wish people would talk this low irl♡

[@fatimadridi4659]

Thank you 🙏

[@Theenglishinternationl]

•Can a person love us without liking particularly anything about us ? •Can't we express why we love a person?