A DEMON ALTER!? - MEET THE ALTERS - MARA | Dissociative Identity Disorder | DissociaDID

[@gracecadet3244]

"I'll be good" and "I didn't even say anything" hit me so hard..... This is gonna be a bit of a long story and several alters are huddling toward the front, so sorry if it doesn't all make as much sense as I'd like. But anyway, my longest running co-host / internal partner has said things like this many times over the years, and it breaks my heart. She was our main protector for a long time but also VERY much a persecutor (destructive to the body, destructive and controlling thought patterns, strict gag orders, relationship sabotage, etc etc etc), and so we as a system felt often times that we had every right to build up stigma and prejudice and boundaries against her because of all the pain and turmoil she's caused over the years. But as we've gotten older, gone through more therapy/self-education/self-reflection, and grown leaps and bounds in system communication, I understand in hindsight that there have been times where she was trying desperately to make amends and just have a place in the system without being shunned, mistrusted, or even sometimes mistreated by other headmates. It just makes me so sad for these very misunderstood alters. Of course keeping yourself and your system as safe as possible is important and trust issues can tend to run rampant among people with lots of trauma, but let's not ever forget that ultimately everyone is capable of growth, change, and redemption. I love how Kya brought it back around in the end to make sure Mara knew she was appreciated and welcome, and even complimented her creative makeup job even though it's not personally their kind of thing and was unnerving. Baby steps like these are so important. To any persecutor or past-persecutor trying to make things right and find more common ground with your systems, we (Grace and Lilly) see you and care about you, and we acknowledge that just because your actions and intentions are complicated or born of unhealthy thought patterns or coping skills doesn't mean they're always purposefully malicious. You were made for a reason, and that is valid. No matter what role it was or how unpalatable for others, your body's brain believed that having you be part of the team was necessary, so it is. But it also doesn't have to stay the same forever. Have patience and humility with yourself and your system as roles and relationships change, keep communication open as much as possible, and just do the best with what you've got each day. One day hopefully you'll look up and realize you're not the "bad guy" anymore, you're just another valid and valued part of your system. 💜 Sorry this turned into a TedTalk lol, but thanks for reading if you did, and I hope maybe it helps some people 😊

[@vitalityinair5864]

Thank you for writing this

[@nancy9401]

Very well said! 💞

[@lro1557]

Thank you for sharing this I personally don't have did but am struggling with mental health and this video and comment makes me hate myself a bit less it's ok to struggle and be shitty frome time to time I hope your system all the best ( I love the turm headmate✨🙃)

[@definitelynotjustsomeguywi3826]

3:18

[@zahraaal-qudsi3725]

Omg great comment I hope everyone persecuter alter reads this 🌹

[@le_quenzy8456]

"No God put me here. Humans put me here." What a strong message about how our environment does horrible things to our mental state sometimes

[@music2012pink]

I know right, I love that quote so powerful!

[@phoebesmith8154]

I’ve felt her exact sentiment for most of my life. Humans made me what I am, they are the ones I tend to take it out on. It’s not conscious. (No DID but trauma all the same). I have strict rules about anyone mistreating animals and kids though (to my head they are innocent and not capable or culpable for the malice of the human species).

[@jusonali]

that gave me chills, its so sad that its so true. Our hell is here on earth

[@jaclynt1728]

I feel like that could be a famous quote for a tv series/movie.

[@le_quenzy8456]

@@phoebesmith8154 Every person is innocent from the right perspective, it doesn't mean they did something that is okay tho, regardless if they are compulsive actions or not

[@jessica232]

I found it interesting that when Mara was fronting, the makeup looked perfectly natural. When Kya showed up, it was more like watching someone wearing Halloween makeup.

[@reneenevermore2771]

You’re right!

[@julianna6847]

The make up is incredible but it doesn't suit Kya, must be weird for people seeing it for the first time

[@Tashlikesyou]

Yeah exactly you could see the shift of Mara gone and the makeup just looking very out of place because it's not Kya's essence

[@ADaniBear]

@@girlwithahabit5105 I guess you’re unable to pick up on how differently they act. They have very different mannerisms especially Mara. She tends to twitch her lips more in a.. snarl? Show off her teeth more, using her hands to rest her head or touch her face more, rolls their eyes/widening them for emphasis meanwhile Kya is more laid back and not using her hands as much. Kya doesn’t have as exaggerated expressions shown by Mara. Very different so sorry you couldn’t pick up on those nuances 🙄

[@ADaniBear]

@@girlwithahabit5105 also very rude to call their system a phoney 🖕

[@vcabrera5396]

“No god put me here. Humans put me here.” - Mara That really resonated with me. That’s a sadly relatable quote. Edit: To be clear, I’m not a system, I’m just a single person. But still, that quote really resonated. I can’t even imagine how much it must resonate for those with DID, and I won’t pretend to. Wishing love to anybody who’s struggling, system or otherwise.

[@heleninglis9961]

That really struck a chord with me too.

[@TheIndigoSystem]

That got us too.

[@solsystem1342]

Mood -Luci

[@Tanya_Maria]

That's exactly what I said to myself last night in the balcony. It's important no one is alone whit these thoughts. I think all mental illnesses go hand in hand. I dont want to say I jnderstand but I kinda do...I went through a hell as a child. Im so happy we can now educate ourselves and Others in 2022! 💜

[@daivaperic4934]

For real, that hit me like a ton of bricks.

[@robinskyemckenzie5448]

Aaa, I almost cried when Mara said "I don't want to go.... I didn't even say anything." Childhood feelings resurfaced hard there

[@AlaSmith-ls2lk]

I have 2 main alters currently. Alex (protector) and Jessica (comforter), who are twin alters. Jess was my childhood friend, but then I needed a more protective alter, so Alex took care of me. Jess didn't do anything to be left behind like she was. She decided to try to be like Alex, which doesn't work since her role was the opposite of Alexs. She became unstable and now has tried to rid of me and Alex. We (Alex and I) are trying to work with her currently.

[@AlaSmith-ls2lk]

Thank you @@rukhi512. Though, she's.... gone now. Thank you though for your encouragement :)

[@AlaSmith-ls2lk]

I'll try my best @@rukhi512. Thank you 😁

[@anotherdepressedbitch]

@@AlaSmith-ls2lkhow are you now darling?

[@jodoodlyboi2963]

​@@AlaSmith-ls2lk by "gone" do you mean dormant or integrated?

[@ABirdOnTheMoon]

I love how Sera can actually tell when Kya is around .. and when she is needed. Those animals and their 6th senses. My cat can tell when I am depressed and though he’s not cuddly.. he will come to me and jump to my lap or lay beside me and allow me to stroke him .. it’s amazing how intelligent animals are .. we are blessee

[@TheMocha2008]

I agree! Seraphina's whole story kind of makes me get goosebumps. The fact that Seraphina wasn't a cuddly kitten to anyone the original owner showed her to, but when Kya came by she was always by them, snuggling. And the fact that she only came into the room when Kya had just switched with Mara kind of makes me think that she knows when Kya's fronting. I feel like they're soulmates. Like in stories when a witch gets a cat that is their soulmate and they are bonded for life, that is how I feel like Kya and Seraphina are. And how Seraphina always knew just when Kya was dissociating or when they needed her, like she was a trained emotional support or service cat. And I don't think that Seraphina is trained like, not that I know of anyways. Match made by the universe for sure

[@book_wolf_1939]

Lyeah, l catsl are really good at calming people down, they aren't actually as heartless as people think, they're very intuitive and will always be there to comfort their loved ones even if they don't always seem the most friendly

[@DailyDebate24]

Yeah i agree i was searching for this comment. She is such an amazing cat.

[@cosmicwitchclarith]

Animals are amazing! I have pretty bad unmedicated ADHD and my dog knows right away when my energy levels rise too much. I get pretty emotional and it can cause alot of distress (happy sad angry doesn't mattter) so when I start building up she crawls to me and tells me to pet her before I even get the chance to say or do anything. When she does that I realise how high my emotions are and I can calm down while cuddling her.

[@CrimsonChannie]

I feel like she must’ve somehow learnt the that sudden silence or fading voice means ‘I’m needed!!!’ And is always listening to make sure they’re ok ❤️

[@eilinenadela]

"You think of yourselves as so insignificant that you would need a God or devil or a hell to cause eternal torment. Like you're not doing it already. If you think you can't put demons in someone's mind you're wrong" This one hit me hard and is gonna be my new favorite quote. I actually do like Mara.

[@hippityhoppity6313]

It might be literal. I had 2 child alters in my mind that actually were demons and were cast out when I gave my life to Christ. Demonic entities can enter through trauma.

[@renzies3683]

omg yes i love this too

[@Ella-th6rm]

It really, is cool. I think Mara is really cool i hope she does get better with her issues and I hope it all goes well.

[@Lozzy4992]

Yess this one hit me so hard

[@Pokezone33]

Yeah jeez, this quote hit me hard too. I actually had to pause when Mara said that.

[@kenpokid10]

Seraphina coming in to comfort Kya after sensing something was wrong was just the sweetest thing! She seems like a very smart kitty and a lovely friend

[@codexwinchester]

Everyone "you can't train cats! You own a cat you are just the human that feeds them" *points at Serafina sensing something was different and IMMEDIATELY responding* If that isn't the best darn example of emotional support cat, I dont know what is!

[@vixystales9405]

@Gladio Draws they really can! I have a cat who's become my emotional support animal and he always knows when I'm upset and comes for cuddles when I'm in a bad headspace. The other night I was over at a friend's place and was telling him about.. past trauma... And when I started to feel the panic setting in his 9 month old kitten jumped up in my lap and started purring and letting me cuddle him until I felt better ❤️

[@lhollyrivera3408]

Animals are truly amazing

[@awkwardlys6640]

Oh a kitty named Seraphina 🥺 like from princess and the pauper

[@Katt-the-dog42]

She is the perfect kitty for kay and the rest of the system😊❤

[@djcarson9030]

"No God put me here, humans put me here" if that doesn't sum up my trauma all in one statement i don't know what ever will. I dont have DID but I can 1000% relate to that statement with my own experiences and past trauma and it also kinda helps to put into perspective for some people on what causes DID and alters to form, not necessarily people in general but people and their actions to others/the host

[@Bleachshugo]

That line hit me, too. It hit me right in a chest. I almost whistled, lol

[@m0ppp]

Totally hit me in the feels too.

[@ravensrealm1170]

It hit me in the feels too, because so many people try to say "god put you through this for a reason, its going to make you stronger" when i talk about trauma and the aftermath, but no god gave me the trauma, humans did, and idc if it will make me or anyone else stronger, it is still something id never wish on anyone in any way shape or form

[@Gh0stberry_]

I relate to that so much. From what I'm aware of about my mental health, I have undiagnosed BPD. It's a real struggle to live most days as my gender dysphoria, trust issues and anxiety all gang up on me, metaphorically punching and kicking every part of my body. I have to remind myself that I'm no longer a reflection of my own actions, but of the pain the children in my primary school put me through. There may not have been any physical damage, but the things they said cut me so deeply that I've lost almost all remnants of a personality. It's another reason why I can understand that DID forms between the ages of 7-9 - that's when the bullying started. Also, the glass bowl metaphor: a glass bowl that has been dropped and, as it shatters, you realise you have no way of putting it back together. But you're deathly afraid of buying a new glass bowl, because it won't be the same glass bowl that you always had on display in your home. So you play around with the glass pieces, trying to create *anything*, and you just put that out on display - hoping that no one notices it's not a glass bowl. Sorry I spoke for so long, I felt some of the things said in this video so deeply that I felt like I needed to leave a comment somewhere.

[@amateurmallard]

TOTALLY. It wasn't until I saw this that I realized that the standard supervillain isn't exaggerated for comic or dramatic effect. We just haven't seen enough people - or alters - that can provide a model for it.

[@SpiderLydia]

Okay but side note, Seraphina immediately knowing that something was wrong and coming to cuddle to help and then knowing when she was good to leave was honestly the most pure thing I've ever seen.

[@primetimehome]

ragdolls are some of the most loveliest cats in the world

[@TheKitteth]

Theres lots of cats & dogs that have no training at all that pick up on their owners seizing or having epileptic fits minutes before it happens, I dont doubt for a minute that some kind of shift in their energy or brain waves or whatever it is that they can pick up on arent the same thing.

[@glitterspray]

Animals know things.

[@plainbutterfly1153]

Yk what they say animals can sense emotions

[@rachaelshort1704]

@@JakeKoenig as someone with cats, the car wasn't struggling to go down. It was chilling in her arms. Stop with the wild speculation, it's gross.

[@baileyanderson-kita3271]

She gives me chills. The anger that radiates off of her just reminds me of all the sadness that this body and this system has gone through. It reminds me a lot of the anger and broken sadness I feel due to my own trauma. I hope someday Mara can feel better or heal somehow. But I dont know if that's how DID works...

[@chanellegranlund7890]

Ruby, one of her foremost protectors is a former persecutor. She made some videos in the past. I think she made one about keeping their littles safe and she introduced herself in meet the alters. So persecutors can totally change and get better 😊

[@red_3107]

@@wu5693 Pardon?

[@Vlad2319]

There's discussion in psychology that those with DID/MPD can be reassembled. Although most psychologists who do work with these systems know that it's likely just one particular alter finally coming to the front and holding the rest back/down and not really being made whole in a way that neurotypical people would think.

[@microwavebrain1035]

I got goosebumps the second she started talking

[@hoperobertson3732]

It was soo much crazy energy radiating off her! Obviously she is definitely different but it almost looked as if her eyes even had a bit of a different look!

[@Magicmammoth934]

Mara is fascinating, her control over her speech is notably higher than Kya. Every pause, extended word, facial expression and movement was designed to take control, guide where she needs, make the impression she wants. Can very much see how she is a protector

[@aelandco6740]

Hey! You should correct your comment ^^ their name is spelled Kya!

[@melliecara]

Remindss me of Jade…

[@arny625]

@@melliecara Yes!

[@KatieCochran]

@@aelandco6740 It really doesn’t matter lol.

[@UltraV6565]

@@KatieCochran ok Kayty

[@4footdragonlord]

Watching this again years later after Mara fused with Kya and created Soren and his sister, I find it strangely powerful that Mara's attempt at introducing herself here led to parts of Mara now existing in Soren, in a way I guess. Soren or whoever else, you speaking about your lifelong journey with trauma is indeed incredibly helpful to people like me who also will live with trauma forever. Thank you for this video, Mara, Kya, and Soren.

[@shadow_song]

so there's parts of Mara in Soren now? wow, did not expect that!

[@sparklight0964]

@@shadow_song Mara and Kya integrated which led to the new host Soren and his twin

[@anikanele7958]

I like how Mara isnt here to scare us. I mean: yes, she is scary, but from the very first moment you can see that shes here because she wants us to meet her, to get to know her. She doesnt want to scare us away. And I love the Makeup, I wish I could do something like this, she´s very talented!

[@thrl_l9886]

The makeup is absolutely breathtaking 😫😫😫

[@Silver_wind_1987_]

@@thrl_l9886 her inside self is so pretty!!!!

[@TheJoelking01]

As someone that had no idea that "non-human" could mean "mythical" creatures this is really interesting to watch. But we love you Mara, welcome to the channel.

[@TheIndigoSystem]

We have two faerie alters in ours

[@oliviakreulen8895]

That’s so cool! We have a few angels in ours!

[@AzureAsher]

@@TheIndigoSystem so do we!

[@AzureAsher]

We have demons, angels, faeries, monsters and mythical creatures or hybrids in our system. Its surprisingly common in our system. - Ash

[@qaiwiwi]

Question to the people who replied, is it possible to get alters that aren't exactly considered humanoid? Like a phoenix for example. Or is it only possible to get things such as faeries, angels, demons and stuff like that?

[@friskybitzboi]

I hope Mara’s “rehab” continues and she gets to heal; holding all those negative feelings is probably draining, on both her individually and on all of you collectively

[@yukiandkanamekuran]

Negative feelings in systems aren't something you can just necessarily let go and forget and everyone will be happy again. Triggers get brought up, past anger resurfaces. Pain needs to be processed and systems need closure in order to move forward. So, as well meaning as this comment is, please remember that alters like Mara aren't negative in a way that they can easily move on from. They need a whole new way of understanding and self love and accepting the negativity in order to heal. If you just try to detach from the whole thing, you will create a larger gap. These alters need to be accepted with darkness in all.

[@friskybitzboi]

@@yukiandkanamekuran No that’s what I mean, that I hope she and the system is able to heal in a way where those negative feelings aren’t so all-consuming or are at least not directed back on Kya or any other alters- that she’s able to be a good protector by using that distrust for others to protect the system as opposed to being destructive

[@yukiandkanamekuran]

@@friskybitzboi yeah, I just honestly relate to a lot of Mara's feelings within my own system. When my persecutors front, it's feelings of panic and mania, worst case scenarios of something going wrong. Alters like Mara are "scary" because it pushes other people away. They feel trapped and silenced because of some sort of self hate. They're the ones who are traumatized the most and deserve the most kindness in an internal framework. Kya and Mara are a part of the same body and are learning to work together. She doesn't need to be good enough or positive enough, she just deserves to heal, is what I'm saying. I know not everyone's system is as charitable and some persecutors need to not harm the system. But I trust mine with my life, they're a part of me, no matter what. I may not let my alters self harm in the front, but their feelings exist, they exist, and I hope they're able to heal.

[@TandtheDragons]

Pleasure to meet you, Mara. Your makeup is FIRE

[@Undidiridium_]

A good friend of mine was recently diagnosed with DID. I've known her for several years and it all sort of makes sense now. Some of her alters knew but the main host didn't. Over the years I've talked to several alters but she lives far away so I just assumed things had changed from our times apart. She use to talk about this angel she saw that would protect her all the time from bad things, especially when she was young. but when our friendship grew the angel stopped coming around. Not long after being diagnosed we had a talk and an alter came out and introduced itself as the integrated version of the angel and another alter. She told me that when we became friends she was no longer needed. I became the person she could rely on and trust and so she and another alter ended up integrating and that's why the host didn't see her anymore and she thanked me. It was a very surreal experience for me. I've felt like I haven't done a whole lot for her since we live so far away but watching your channel (since before she was diagnosed) really helped me to understand DID and I think it made it a safe place for my friend to be open to me about it. If anything, your channel helps me to better understand things so I can be there for my friend when she needs me. Thank you 💜

[@laurapaivab]

Wow! 💜

[@kris_pang]

That's beautiful.

[@nhhhbbhb9910]

That is really beautiful

[@mimu6700]

That is so beautiful to read. Thank you for being a good human.

[@peachypufff]

that’s amazing….if i was ever told something like that, i would literally cry right in front of them. to have an alter integrate with another or disappear entirely (if that happens) because meeting you healed a part of the host’s trauma or because you unknowingly served as their protector and the one they can rely on the most….is really an honor.. you’re an amazing friend.

[@crimsonsiren]

"No god put me here...humans put me here." And the talk of us being insignificant that we think we need a higher power is just so incredibly deep. I just absolutely love all of you, thank you for sharing your journy. Also Seraphina is best kitten ever! 💗💗💗

[@MaggieJaneSimpson]

i've had chills up my spine when she (/him/they? i don't know) said it

[@sheloveswilby]

Yea that ... that phrase was everything

[@phoebesmith8154]

@@ambitiously_ doesn’t make it less true. We think an awful lot of ourselves. You don’t see animals praising deities and then using it to account for their actions.

[@crimsonsiren]

@@ambitiously_ Okay...and? I don't care where it came from, it's deep because it's true. 🙄

[@hippityhoppity6313]

God created her and loves her, but the humans in her life treated her horribly.

[@theirnameiscole]

Watching Seraphina come to the switch rescue with cuddles made me cry in the best way. Animals are so precious and important and I’m so glad your system has her for comfort and love. Nice to meet you Mara!

[@PerpetualSketch]

(if mara ever wanted to do an "alter does my makeup" video i would watch the HECK out of it -- i NEED to know how she did her lipstick!!)

[@strangebird2933]

same tho

[@hanikazuha]

Oh, now that you have said it, I really want to see how Mara does her make up

[@zoinkslosers6770]

I would 100% love more content by mara, she is so beautiful to me

[@thechickenskeptic]

I would love to see that

[@StarWatcher18]

Yes please!

[@NuMindframe]

Ooh this makeup is amazing😍 Nice to meet you, Mara🖤

[@mizzkittenttv]

Agreed, the makeup was lovely! Thank you for trusting us enough to say hello Mara!

[@vickiolson1993]

@@mizzkittenttv I agree. Amazing makeup and hello Mara

[@erassmia]

Oh hi! Nice to see you here

[@NuMindframe]

@@erassmia hi!💜💜💜

[@alexx1769]

"as if you're not doing it already" OOF the vibes she's giving off are dark but like... kinda love it. Speak those truths!

[@joelineleach6530]

Beautifully unnerving ❣️

[@immaprocrastinator]

I would love to watch Jade and Mara have a conversation. Unstoppable force meets immovable object

[@TheNo1pencil]

That's a great way to put they vibe the two of them give off

[@notwhoyouthink.]

OMG I was thinking the same thing!

[@charlidvds3296]

I have a feeling that they might not get along

[@1LauraMeow]

@@charlidvds3296 Yeah. Even though they both have dark style, very cold presence, Jade seems more like a tough love alter -- like, eyeing the human up and down, cold demeanour, short questions, short answers, Jade is there to protect the system. Mara seems like "everything is danger" so we need to push everything and everyone away including ourselves and myself. But it would be interesting to at least have someone in the system who knows about them both, talk about them, of course if they're allowed to.

[@eshkarri556]

@@TheNo1pencil what happened to ruby

[@harleenhufflepuff340]

You get the sense that Mara is a very strong alter, personality wise. She knows who she is and what she is and she definitely not afraid to speak her mind. There aren't a lot of alters in the system that feel as powerful as she feels. Maybe Jade. I think, once she can get her priorities in line with the rest of the system and stop working against the others, she's going to be an important figure in making sure you guys aren't pushed around in the future. We see you, Mara. And we hope that you can see the positive value that you can bring to the system.

[@taranaomi7771]

My gosh when Mara said "No God put me here... Humans put me here" I felt that and I don't even have trauma. My majors in school are political science Premed, minors in nanotechnology and biology and through that you see the good the bad the ugly and the down right demonic sides of humans. Mara I hope we get to see more of you. You're realistic and chaotic. I dig it and I dig this channel. Keep going DissociaDID(I hope I spelt that right!)

[@marinamaged962]

Wow you’ve got a lot on your plate

[@taranaomi7771]

@@marinamaged962 at times it feels like a lot but tbh it is actually so much fun for me! It also gives me a chance to see the raw sides of humanity from the political, hard scientific, and psychological aspects which creates a good balance for me.

[@Sharebearr1214]

That was DEEEEP hit me hard. Hit a lot of us hard.

[@LinWarai]

when she said that i almost wanted it to be quoted and put on an artistic mug or tapestry or something… what a powerful quote

[@trishabowes1058]

Kya - I love how, as host, you refuse to rob even persecutors of their autonomy and voice. You could have refused to post this video, you could have tried to actively suppress Mara, but instead you gave her the chance to come forward and speak to your followers, and you posted the video for us to see. Sure you had to rein her in, but you could have suppressed her entirely and you didn’t. I love that you put effort into embracing all alters your system, even the alters that can be more difficult. It’s something even people like me, who don’t have DID or OSDD, can learn from. Embrace all parts of yourself, because they are all valid and worthy of embracing, but actively seek to heal the damage and to move negative toward the positive direction. It’s how we should all always treat ourselves, whether “ourself” is singular, or a system of several. Mara - Happy to meet you. You’re so interesting! And your makeup is wicked. Glad you’re rehabilitating, even if you find it frustrating. If you feel like sharing more with us, I’d love to see it. Also, your system may have the best kitty in the world. She is INFINITELY precious.

[@ashleywhite8888]

as a reformed persecutor this is hardly autonomy - kerrah EDIT: then again defining alters/system members primarily by their system roles and especially not thinking of a host as an "alter" while labelling the rest of the system as alters is already an indicator of their& autonomy

[@trishabowes1058]

@@ambitiously_ I don’t know what happens to people to make them so jaded, that they refuse to ever entertain the possibility that something/someone is genuine... it’s sad to see and frustrating to deal with. Please take non-constructive negativity elsewhere. I’m not here for it.

[@trishabowes1058]

@@ashleywhite8888 I’d be glad to hear what your system what has to say. What can be done by DID systems to grant more autonomy to persecutors? Does it inherently pose a risk to the health/wellbeing of the system or system members? If so, what can be done to minimize that? I know little about DID systems, but I love to learn.

[@ashleywhite8888]

​@@trishabowes1058 our experience is as an OSDD-1b system, rather than a DID system, but this should apply here's the thing. persecutors doing what they do is just an aggressive trauma response, a singlet can be that way too. but a singlet's allowed to live their life, make their own friends, go through their own therapy, make their own vent art, have their own distractions, etc. if you just let them live their own life separate from your own with equal fronting time, or even just figure out some sort of healthy outlets for them, you'll see a lot of improvement then again the way we manage our system is very different from the medically advised and widely recognized way. while we do have cohosts as mostly a fallback for when switching out occurs for non-host system members, we attempt to make sure that nobody has a hierarchy over one another, and that DOES include persecutors being seen as equals with cohosts. this has been nothing but healthy for us because, surprise, when people are seen as people, they feel better about themselves and shove themselves into boxes of what they're seen as instead less EDIT: actually, this goes for one type of persecutor but not the other. in our experience, persecutors tend to either be based on something traumatic or based on the anger and need to lash out caused by said traumatic thing. those that are based directly on the traumatic event or person or thing are usually needing to be kept on a much closer watch because they're not equivalent to a singlet having a trauma response, they're equivalent to an abuser that you've lived through.

[@juliakauffman3639]

@@ambitiously_ It seems like you have an unpopular opinion here. Do you feel like this wasn't genuine? What brought you to that perspective? /genuine question

[@mrpoki9]

Not only that there’s definitely a change in Mara and Kya in how they speak, behave etc., Mara *wore* that Makeup while Kya just had it on their face. Nothing but love, strength and support for your system!

[@rachelbreault700]

It's incredible just how different they are. They may share a body but they each make the body look completely different.

[@jesscork5500]

I know exactly what you mean, when Mara was out it worked with her expressions and was quite intimidating, but when Kya switched back in it almost seemed like kids face paint instead. Really interesting how different they are in the way they behave not just in personality but with their whole face.

[@Dodl1]

Also the face of Kya seeing the make-up for the first time. These are the fun parts in all that hardship!

[@amateurmallard]

For squishy lumps of flesh, human brains can do a lot more stuff than I think anyone could have predicted

[@mirandapanda5439]

This woman is putting on a show for her subscribers.. this isn't what DID looks like.

[@barbiedoll44]

@@mirandapanda5439 DID may be different for everyone. They are sharing their life and their own experiences. things affect people differently, especially in this case a mental disorder guess why? everyone is not the same. if you want to start a channel to film your experiences, go ahead nobody is stopping you. but to come onto their channel and call them phoney is disgusting

[@wondertyzipp8260]

@@barbiedoll44 they've already been exposed before and their diagnosis is invalid. Don't be so naiive.

[@tonypena5324]

@@wondertyzipp8260 really where?

[@mshoney9301]

@@wondertyzipp8260 I actually did and armchair psychology with no evidence comes up, also weird parasocial hating, invalidating people's mental health struggles like this is gross

[@mattc421]

Very interesting to see a drastically different alter than ones we've seen previously. I hope you're all doing okay. Also Seraphina is so sweet omg. And I hope Mara does reach out to Kya

[@lablab657]

Seraphina had grown do fast already !

[@theattic0426]

As a persecutor/protector myself I'm excited for this even though I don't watch this type of stuff often. Can't wait. Thank you for always helping our system understand ourselves better and know it's okay and natural to be how we are.

[@illumizoldyck3528]

Thank GOD we aren't the only ones who speak out loud to each other. We just prefer it so much, at least when we are alone. One of our alters actually did this yesterday when he was scolding me about something💀

[@illumizoldyck3528]

Also, im so glad to see that the dissociation/switching isn't just staring at the wall cause we look like that too when we switch and we thought it invalidated us

[@Midnight-xf5od]

We're glad we're not the only ones to do this as well

[@Cool-Vest]

From what I can interpolate, I use speaking to myself in a similar way. I should mention I'm not a system, just singular. But I use it to juggle and rearrange my thoughts, make them concrete before my brain scatters them back across the winds of my frantic mind. So yeah, not exactly the same, but I can use a similar function within myself to relate.

[@redsydevil]

The energy Mara gives of was intense but I am glad that she is as well reclaiming her voice and that she feels good about the channel. It was really nice to meet you Mara and I wish you a good journey on your redemption arc

[@Jrow215]

Mara speaks like a blend of Ruby and old Nina Sharp and witty like ruby, low bullshit tolerance But somewhat drawn out and a little airy like old nina. Interesting

[@leonora993]

Totally agree!

[@WhiteRaven696]

I find it super interesting that Kya used Harley Quinn as an example of fictive alters, because Mara was definitely giving me Harley-esque vibes, just not as bubbly. So maybe closer to Punchline, Joker's new girlfriend.

[@koen23]

@@WhiteRaven696 personaly she was giving me more the vibes of the Joker himself (as a female then but you get the point)

[@JessLoveyy]

she was very intense lol

[@joeywild2011]

The way Mara says her ‘t’s and ‘s’s is very distinct. Sharp and noticeable. Nice to meet you Mara!

[@joeywild2011]

@Superfluous ???

[@aerai11423]

@@joeywild2011 guessing they deleted their comment (s?).

[@padfoots_paws]

I feel like so much has changed the past 2 years its crazy! Hope you are all well

[@DissociaDID]

It's been a very traumatic few years, so lots of changes haha but doing well now!

[@TheKarret]

@@DissociaDID I'm not the OP, but it's amazing how strong your system is. I'm really happy y'all are doing well now! All the positive vibes your way!

[@laurenpearson5807]

As much as I loved Nin and Chloe, I really appreciate the direction Kya is taking the channel. It feels a lot more raw and less clinical while still being very educational

[@kevsanahking5415]

I hope those threats from Mara didn't hurt you Kya. There's just so much you all must go through (even Mara) and you are all so strong and so amazing to use your experience to educate others here on this channel. Thank you for another video and I hope you are doing well.

[@DissociaDID]

They didn't hurt me. I accept those particular threats as fact and they have no power over me. I used to be a Persecutor too, I know where she's coming from. ❤️ Thank you for the concern and care!

[@oldsoldier4209]

@@DissociaDID Thank you, for being willing to post this unplanned appearance. I’m not sure I’d have had the courage, in your place, to let the public see an alter this aggressive towards everything. It’s one of the reasons I love your channel, and the podcast. You openly discuss things that society has long relegated to dark corners, and hushed whispers. People need to see and accept that trauma is real, before the world can make concrete progress on stopping the things that cause it. Right now, the war in Ukraine is exposing everyone to the reality of mass trauma. But, it’s important that everyone understand trauma exists at the individual level, too, and it can be just as devastating. Your system, and others, may be exactly what this world needs, whether most of us want to admit that, or not. Also, not that she’ll care, but, props to Mara on the makeup. It’s very striking, but we’ll balanced, with an almost haunting beauty.

[@LaNoireDetruit]

@@DissociaDID Oooh, I didn't even think about that - so true! Since you were created/born(?) in part from a persecutor, that must give you a very different perspective in these situations than other alters.

[@smallbeginning2]

@@DissociaDID so when they were insulting you at the time, you couldn't hear it? You discovered it in the footage? Just seems like mara is having a conversation. I'm curious 🙂

[@mariekeana]

@@smallbeginning2 Kya was close to the front so they could hear what Mara was saying. Imagine Mara driving the car and Kya sitting in the passenger seat.

[@jamesryan5667]

This project, the work you're doing here. It's probably hard to see from your end, but it reaches beyond DID. For someone who doesn't live with this, but has other mental health struggles. I can't explain it, but it helps. Truly. Never doubt that your content supports people, because it really does. I've never commented on your videos, but I feel like I just want to leave this here. Thank you

[@DissociaDID]

I'm so glad, thank you so much ❤️

[@annabelleponterdolph]

I second this. Thank you so much ❤️

[@sarastajic9623]

I feel the same way! 🤗

[@mizzkittenttv]

Agreed!

[@abisaurusrexx3459]

I third this

[@ren9897]

It's so interesting to me how animals can sense things emotionally that other humans can't. Your cat is adorable and very pretty and it's nice to meet Mara! I hope everyone's doing well

[@Hannah-pq9ui]

‘No god put me here humans put me here’ wow as someone who has experienced trauma that hit home and is unfortunately very true very powerful and such a simple way of putting it.

[@lovepilie]

Mara "oddly" left a sweet impression on me : I felt her protective kindness shine through, and I was feeling totally OK with her being ready to attack if there was a reason to, it felt reassuring to see her at your side. I think she protects you AND wants to show that you can defend yourself while being bold, confident, and loving yourself. Like, "you are not the problem, others are"... Kudos to all the courage and strength you are using to handle the changes in your system while informing us about DID. I wish you the best... and I STAN SERAPHINA too!!!!

[@jes3927]

You've phrased this beautifully. I've always wondered why I admire them so much.

[@childofivy]

The name Mara means bitter. She definitely suits the name, like an old warrior who's seen hell on earth as they're protecting what's theirs.

[@novepipps]

God of love in Skyrim

[@lightpillar8351]

That definitely suits her very well ! Can I ask something too?, English is not my first language so I not really understand what ‘grounding’ I this context mean 😢 can you explain it a little bit more ?

[@scedrastoffel5142]

@@lightpillar8351 it’s like trying to bring herself back into the body or themselves depending on who is out it’s like a way to tell your body that you’re still in the place you are and not where you are in your mind

[@lightpillar8351]

@@scedrastoffel5142 Thank you ! That really help !

[@jordanrichards3814]

This is so much shit can't believe I've stumbled onto this stop playing characters and deal with your trauma

[@pikaqte5418]

Gotta say for the record that Mara is very intense and it's rather impressive. I could feel her power from the screen and it's very awe-inspiring to me. It's nice to meet you, Mara and thank you for doing this!

[@enlightening.wisdom]

I love Mara's expressions and her way of talking, but it's sad to know she's so negative and that she came to life because of more trauma and pain.

[@ElektricEli]

Why she sound like a theater kid tho

[@Lenergyiskey358]

I love your phrase 'came to life'. Thats how it feels. Like they're born and life is breathed into them because of the trauma. The more I learn about mine and others DID demonstrates the amazing creativity of the brain/mind.

[@AliceBunny05]

​@@ElektricEliall alters speak in a different manner (unless they're posing as the host), some are more flamboyant others rather monotone, and often you'll find people in general can be more intense and sometimes theatrical when they're very passionate or have a lot of conviction or strong emotion surrounding something. You'll notice she dosen't always have the same level of theatric body and verbal language, it's less pronounced when she's saying something that needs no conviction or isn't emotionally direct or heavy. She's much more theatrical/intense when she's verbalizing her most direct and severe inner thoughts, which you can also hear in the tone of her voice.

[@OwlyFisher]

​@@ElektricEli she was based on a tiktok character so obviously she enunciates like it's a performance.. shes born from a character being acted

[@Swenglish]

It seemed like Mara thought Kya was pulling her from the front on purpose, but then it seemed like that wasn't so much the case. I hope y'all managed to get that cleared up. I'd imagine building trust and even just benefit of doubt isn't the easiest thing when communication is limited.

[@kitoh01]

So I haven't commented here before, or really anywhere, but I just wanted to express my appreciation for all your effort in making these videos. I'm a therapist and I work a lot with people who've experienced trauma. Going through your videos provided insight into dissociation that I never learned in school. I have a better understanding of trauma and ways to work with people who've experienced trauma because of your videos (i.e. and other awesome systems I looked for because of your videos such as Entropy system, Multiplicity and Me, etc). I was able to integrate principles or educational information from your videos directly into my work and saw an immediate positive impact. I was then led to other sources of trauma informed care that made me a better therapist. I recognize making these videos takes a lot of time and effort. I know that putting yourself out here like this can be a risk. I just want you to know there are people in therapy right now who feel safer in their therapeutic process because these videos exist. There are people in therapy right now who have a better understanding of their own trauma or dissociative experiences because of the effort you've put into this. So basically, thanks.

[@minimingei]

I completely agree! I am a social work student and I'm studying trauma. This helped me understand so much more how complex trauma can be!

[@shiruki8974]

It might be the weed but i got so emotional reading this comment. (Just to clarify, i don't have DID) It made me think how much good is in the world as to do all this, and care about the wellbeing of others so passionately, learning constantly as a professional. As a child of social workers, therapists, psychologists and psychiatrists since the age of 4, this touched me. Every therapist should take example from you and i wish i had help like you growing up

[@Chelle8847]

@@shiruki8974 what an absolutely lovely comment. I've noticed that on these videos, the comment section does seem particularly caring, kind, and helpful to each other, to strangers on the Internet! It's really amazing to see. It's so nice of you to take the time to make this comment reply. Sending love and peace to you and anyone else reading, from England 🇬🇧✌🏻♥️

[@nellieshoals]

Therapist here too... And I keep learning from these videos... So glad you're back, Kya!!!

[@Anna-pu7hx]

Another therapist here feeling the same gratitude, thank you for sharing and informing us x

[@HeidiSholl]

It's both amazing and heartbreaking to see how much 2020 and 2021 affected you. I'm genuinely proud of you for how you're doing on your journey, and I feel like I've only seen maybe 10% of it.

[@DissociaDID]

Thank you 💜

[@rose1318believe]

My heart skipped a beat when I read how Nin met Doll, that must have been such a traumatic experience!

[@miu3640]

@@rose1318believe How did Nin met Doll? Where did you read it? Dissociadid is so strong :(

[@rose1318believe]

@@miu3640 It's written in the video at 3:58

[@miu3640]

@@rose1318believe oh my god, I'm sorry, I totally missed that :( thank you!

[@tx1c_]

mara kind of reminds me a little bit of nina (if anyone remembers her) but the gestures, behaviours , expressions and the way she talks is really similar to nina. but mara has way heavier negative views on everything in comparison to nina

[@helenasouza9196]

DID is fascinating. It's sad the circumstances in which this disorder appears, but from a cientific point of view, the brain is just amazing, we've seen Chloe who was so sweet and naive, completely unaware of how cruel the internet could be when she had only the best intentions, we saw the transition to Nin and after THE YEAR, we get to know Kya. And Kya is completely different from Nin and Chloe. Sure Kya is sweet, don't get me wrong, but that "sweet naivety" is gone, Kya is strong, open, articulate, she's able to talk about really hard subjects and push through the dissociation. That's evolution. That's visible progress. That's a survivor, right there. This system is a survivor. They are fighting since childhood til' now, and they keep coming back stronger. I hope Mara will get the chance to be part of the channel, I feel like she has much to say even if it's polarizing and some people will get offended, ppl get offended by everything these days and there's always the editing out option, the trigger warnings, but ler her speak her mind a bit, she deserves if she's holding all the trauma from that 2020 shitshow. Maybe that's the therapy and help she needs, she wants to be seen and acknowledged and whatever fall out may come from that, Kya you can handle it. I don't think 2020 will happen again, because you're not the same person you were... Literally. You are the host the system needed. Sure, Mara is clearly intense, and it was quite obvious how unnerving her make up was to you, but you gotta give her props cuz it was freaking cool, Harley Quinn is shaking right now. Lots of love, always.

[@DissociaDID]

This really hit me hard, thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️

[@liviatrevejodellacoletta8612]

Every time I see someone saying that you are faking DID all I can think is "if that person was acting, they would be winning oscars and swimming in money". Everything you do is so real, so visceral and so brave. I love your work!

[@sarcasdidsystem8536]

Mara's personality is so similar to some of our persecutors. She is so badass! 🔥 We are a persecutor-heavy system and seeing her on the channel gives us more courage to talk about persecutors and have them front to share their stories online. Thank you Mara for talking about yourself! You're absolutely amazing and we hope to see you around more often 💎

[@SpecialBlanket]

Yeah i actually know someone quite like this as well

[@chweuri]

And now, they two integrated. How amazing it is. They must developed a relationship of trust in Mara, and she got accepted as she was, and accept herself part of the system. I'm proud of you guys. Fusion hurts, but it's part of healing. I feel sad sometimes, and miss some of the ones who integrated, but I know they are there, and they got better together! Lots of love, always.

[@geora_crafts]

Quick question: Do you ever often find footage from alters trying to record videos that the system wasn't aware of?

[@katmary3721]

I was wondering the same thing!

[@JakeKoenig]

Quick question: Do you ever wonder how these alternate personalities ALL have the awareness to do a specific version of her hair and makeup, set up a camera and ring lighting, and record themselves for a KZbin video? How responsible of her alters to take over her body and immediately get to work creating some juicy content.

[@TheRed_master]

@@JakeKoenig I mean I always assumed that the fact that content creating is their job and a large part of their life and that some alters can communicate with each other would explain that. Also the fact that the filming setup is probably already set up because I'm assuming they have a specific place for recording videos. Also it's definitely not all of their alters making videos about themselves. Also they do their hair and makeup in the way that they want it to be.

[@katymarcella7382]

@@JakeKoenig how much do you hate yourself to be a troll at this level

[@cow167]

@@katymarcella7382 idk, this account has been under fire recently because a lot of people are noticing inconsistencies in the channels videos, even searching up the channels name makes a lot of videos pop up. But idk, I don't have an opinion, but something seems off

[@Justsomebody009]

I think what makes DID so hard is the fact that you kinda wear your trauma on your sleeve. Like most people have childhood trauma, but not everyone has DID the people that don’t have this disorder that is hard to control can get by without really dealing or talking about it, where as systems with DID when you say or tell someone you have DID they automatically know you’ve went through something at a young age. They might never know what you’ve been through but they know you’ve been through something and that’s enough for anyone to tell like someone knows to much. And obviously with the amnesia that’s gonna make it even more difficult for anyone to remember what caused them to develop this disorder. I used to think sure it’s difficult but would be cool. My opinion on that has completely changed. I think it’s more difficult than I did 3 years ago. Never thought about it being a super power like others but I still thought it was cool that the brain does that. Not so much now, I think I can understand how scary and difficult that could be to deal with daily. So props to anyone that has to go through this

[@erinbathie-moore8478]

I'm sorry to admit that I have had the same thought process. But I'm starting to realise how not nice it all is. Thank you for sharing this and making this real with us DissociaDID :)

[@audyo14]

This is an amazing comment

[@Futurebound_jpg]

As hard as it is for the people who have it i still believe it’s extremely interesting that the human brain can do this! The same way dementia/Alzheimer’s is interesting because it prove how our brains shape our reality and we can straight up believe and see something that is not there at all, which DID also proves. As someone whos into psychology im fascinated by it, but i would never wish it upon anyone.

[@flameepidemic4839]

I have osdd 1-b and tbh its saved me although its made my life harder in terms of memory and questioning myself a lot before i found out i dont hate the disorder i think without it id be unalive and much less happy and much less healthy and maybe not alive but i also have a lot of demon alters so no one quite understands im not possessed and they aren’t there to hurt me

[@Justsomebody009]

@@Futurebound_jpg completely agree it’s why I watch her content because psychology and how the brain works is fascinating and I thought about doing a degree in it.

[@emp6985]

Mara has such "don't even think of messing with me" energy, very intimidating, even seeing what looks like might be her saying "back off" to Kya before the switch. I luckily don't suffer from DID or anything in that category, but I work in healthcare and really enjoy learning because there's always room to learn and to help stop misinformation from spreading. Thank you for doing what you guys do, it's such important work.

[@TG-nd9rj]

The little break and Mara going "I'll be *nice*" about a minute in made me smile a little, admittedly. I can just imagine Kya standing behind them and hovering like a parent watching their kid do something for the first time and trying to reign them in. But then the "I don't want to go yet..." hit much differently. I hope Mara comes to learn that their place in the system is important and valuable, and that they ARE a part of the system.

[@mlphelps99]

I love how you can actually tell a difference when Mara is fronting vs when Kya comes back. The tone of voice, the posture, the facial expressions, everything is so different. It's very interesting to see!! Looking forward to seeing more meet the alters videos! ❤️

[@luizarolla]

Yes, i'm super curiose to know the system as it is now after those last years. Love meeting each and everyone of you ♡

[@jadendiaz3615]

Same I know right that's what Is my favorite thing about DiD how you can tell somewhat when a alter switches.

[@TheMocha2008]

@@luizarolla I enjoy meeting the alters too. It can be such an emotional and clarifying way to truly understand the system and DID. Sometimes you just need to hear it straight from the source to understand it. Like the way Mara did it. So impactful! It has helped me understand persecutors so much more now. Although the debunking videos about interjects, persecutors, and "evil" alters taught me a lot and were extremely informational, it was nothing like meeting Mara or watching Dark draw themselves.

[@seriouslysmitten]

I don’t know Mara, but it seemed to me she may have been trying to reach out and use her voice. She stated that she felt smothered by Kya’s presence, but I got the feeling she wants to connect, but not be or feel controlled. I hope her and the entire system continue to heal and grow. Positive thoughts and vibes ❤️🥰

[@patienceRachel]

You mean heal and become one. Integration is what's best.

[@sydneyparkey5301]

She speaks like shes writing a book, she has amazing articulation.

[@halcyon6098]

Most writers are...

[@MommaBear87]

It maybe was written out before hand and multiple takes?

[@itsrobo7857]

@@MommaBear87 I dont think you can plan a switch

[@sirswag1802]

@@itsrobo7857 You can plan a switch, you just have to have good internal communication, or you could use a positive/ negative trigger to create a situation where they would front (a positive one should be used)

[@sirswag1802]

@@MommaBear87 There's a lot of cuts in this video. The person who edited it probably removed all of the extra parts and only put the important stuff.

[@jr6406]

Mara has a strong energy. I’m day 3 in my depressive episode and she is literally everything that I am feeling. I found her very comforting. Like this is someone that ain’t taking shit from no one and has your back.

[@non-existent_charlie]

I hope everything is better now!

[@Schnupperdose]

okay first of all, I love that makeup second: considering Kya was thinking this video wouldn't be useable, and yet 20/30 minutes are in is kinda impressive. Seems Mara did a good job third: I hope Mara's rehab goes well, in addition I hope the system does well and can support eachother the way they need it also cute cat love you (I mostly posted this comment to help the algorithm) P.s. if you think complimenting people, wanting people to have a nice life, and wanting to support creators you like is simping... then call me a simp for half the world bby, clearly you don't actually know what a simp is. Love you

[@Emmy-ql6wr]

“I don’t want to go yet” really hit me. That’s how I feel anytime I dissociate. I think I’m a singlet, but sometimes I’ll feel internally isolated, like something is being kept fro me

[@jkstcibg]

I often feel like that, honestly.

[@Ecliptic-P]

I feel that A lot. Like I feel like a ghost where nobody can see me, I feel like a spectator, I feel like it’s a dream. I don’t like when that happens

[@hatesBarney4life]

@@Ecliptic-P That sounds like disassociation. It can be a symptom of a lot of mental health disorders, even anxiety and depression. My husband and I both disassociate sometimes, but they look very different between the two of us.

[@Ecliptic-P]

@@hatesBarney4life yeah. I watch Psych2Go so ik I prob have it. Not sure though. Don’t feel like telling my parents

[@lawilnet]

@@Ecliptic-P hey for me apparently it's a symptom of my agoraphobia (fear of the crowd and open spaces) my psychologist said. Although agoraphobia can be manifested on other ways, for me it's dissociation.

[@tupperwarewizard25]

im so glad you have seraphina, she seems to have a good sense of when you need to hear her meowing the way she does. thank you for sharing so much of the extremely personal experience of having DID. mara's makeup is indeed very cool!

[@ArcherV8157]

Please never apologize for dissociating/switching. We truly are understanding that you are a system that’s growing and sharing with us what your lives feel and look like. Thank you for sharing your lives with us 💕

[@Minminisanidiot]

mara has one of the most outstanding personalities as an alter herself and I feel like her and kya stand out to me the most. i don't usually comment but my fucking god her existence, and her story is so interesting? I've been researching DID thoroughly since early 2020 and only now have I been able to see like living proof of a nonhuman alter and my fucking god am I hooked. also hey mara.. by any chance you listen to girl in red? because my gawd shes gorgeous :3

[@katiasabbetti]

LMAO "you listen to girl in red" honestly, I have the same question

[@skyxxh]

@@katiasabbetti makes us three lmao

[@qaiwiwi]

@@skyxxh Its four now lmao

[@sascha3135]

THE LAST PART GOT ME I'M CRYING

[@Minminisanidiot]

@@sascha3135 PLEASE LMAO

[@KuroHasu62]

In a completely non-intrusive way, we'd love to see more of Mara if she ever wishes to come more, and if you are all okay with it. She has an almost mesmerizing way to catch your attention, and her voice, her words resonate a lot with us. Anyways, keep up the good work, and more importantly : be safe and take care ! Clara

[@milkisblueberries]

I agree on that, she could help a lot in spreading awareness on what actually goes on as their roles as persecutors / protectors because most people who don't know anything about DID could think they are just destructive (mean) parts of someone's brain.

[@kalielik]

@@milkisblueberries Many and I mean MANY believe persecutors are like a villain, they're bad and they just hurt and destroy everything around them. Which is Very False. Mara can help and really show what it's actually like from the perspective of a persecutor. Like... why did I hurt that alter? Why did I hurt the body? Why do I act in harsh ways towards others? and so on. Yes, some parts of Kya did use to be a persecutor, but that was quite a long time ago. Then Mara is a different person with other opinions and ideas.

[@milkisblueberries]

@@kalielik absolutely, also maybe Mara can help us learn more from the "inside" about what it intakes to be a fictive trying to become real in a very fake world. Anyway, I hope Mara will one day come back safely and show us because it's really important to learn even for actual systems now. (ps: i don't have DID, i'm just really interested in learning more about how it works)

[@th3.f0r3st]

I’ve always wanted to hear about your nonhuman alters! I’ve never really learned about nonhuman alters

[@DissociaDID]

We can do more about that, we do already have a specific video on it too though!

[@th3.f0r3st]

@@DissociaDID I’ll have to check it out later ^^

[@Anne_Onymous]

Very interesting indeed. I didn't even know the alters could be nonhuman until a year or so ago. Then months ago I saw a vid of someone that said one of their alters is a rock. Just mind boggling!

[@earthariss]

@@Anne_Onymous Anything to protect the child is valid and always needed

[@themorndiaries]

i’ve been watching you for YEARS, since chloe & kyle existed & still to this day watching switches blows my mind. the way your demeanor completely changes is wild. you’re so incredibly strong & i will forever support you ❤

[@sundropsoo3431]

It really warms my heart how kind Kya is towards Mara at the end. To complimenting her makeup and being proud of her if her intention was to reach out. Very lovely and supportive to see!

[@TheycallmeTylo]

Right! Made me tear up

[@yyg4632]

I think getting the kitty was such an amazing decision. I had no idea cats were so in touch and patient. Its adorable the way she lays down and looks in ur eyes lovingly. shes basically like a trained therapy kitty.

[@HeavyMetalKittenx]

I like Mara. She speaks truth. You can tell through her that the system has been through a LOT of pain and anger. Welcome Mara. I loved Kyas reaction to the makeup lol! Cats are great at sensing when something is wrong with their “person”. Cats choose a person. My cats know when I don’t feel well with my health issues. They help a lot.

[@astra.mp4]

I've come to respect DID greatly. Mara has left a strong impression on me and I want to thank her for appearing. I am in love with what y'all are doing in this channel and the educational awareness you bring. Huge support 💖💜

[@whatkayladoes]

How Kya spoke to Mara in the end -- the encouragement. That's so healthy and so warm.

[@danilles.4247]

Kya has grown into a beautiful beautiful radiant soul.

[@Pocketful_o_Posies]

"No Gods put me here, humans put me here" I am learning so much about DID through your system! Thank you Mara for explaining a bit about your role. Im sorry it was cut short, but hopefully we can meet you again soon! Also I love how Seraphina is SO in tune with you and your body! This is very intelligent and so sweet! I also find it very interesting your makeup MATCHES the alter who is controlling the body and if another alter switched or controlled the body with that same makeup it doesn't match quite right (i.e. Mara's makeup matches who she is, I found it helped me put a personality to her. But when Kya fronted and still had Mara's makeup on, to me didn't fit or suit her which was really interesting to see) ONE MORE THING! Thank you for acknowledging Mara in her making this video, her makeup, it was a very sweet gesture! I'm sure she wasn't expecting that and I hope she appreciated that and reaches out to you in the future!

[@Charlie-no5pi]

Kya: *dissociatey* Seraphina: HOLD ON IM COMIN IM COMIN

[@DissociaDID]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@anonymous_51910]

That’s so amazing that your kitten helps you all through grounding and knows when you guys are disassociating

[@joshuatree3.14]

During Kya’s explanation they talked about how they deal with the aftermath of switching. When they said that they take a moment to see what could have caused this to happen and why it might have happened I found that useful. I want to try that the next time I find myself disassociating. I think it will definitely help me stay grounded so I can keep going instead of not being able to function. Thanks a lot!! I really enjoy these videos. I learn a bunch each time I watch. So thanks again! Hope you’re doing well.

[@emmaalbers6320]

I'm glad to be seeing more variety! It's super important to show and communicate about "persecutors" to destigmatize!

[@shepherdden8]

"because... it's helping me" @16:20 LITERALLY SO HAPPY!! YOU SAID THAT!!! Your videos are so powerful & so often fun&beautiful. I can't imagine how much of a rollercoaster your life has been. but I rly admire how much of yourselves you're putting out there to make the world a more empathetic place & I hope more people are kinder to you all. also sincerely everyone you've introduced on the channel has been the coolest person I've ever seen

[@theNoctifloralParacosm]

We actually have a factive of Kya, so sorry if that's weird, but he's been such a huge help to us-

[@DissociaDID]

I'm glad he's helping you ❤️

[@lordvraska]

It was interesting getting to actually hear directly from a persecutor. She’s certainly very blunt and opinionated, but I’m glad she’s on a good path and starting to treat the system better. I appreciate you guys showing us this whole interaction, I love you all a bunch, and I look forward to the next video or stream y’all do💜!

[@trystanstewart5620]

I love your cats natural reaction to the switch she’s such a blessing ❤️

[@kenzab1689]

She’s giving me the chills like never before, wow her presence is crazy

[@kar4244]

No matter the video or who's fronting at the time, it always feels like I'm face-timing a friend. ☺ It leaves me with so much I wish I could say to you throughout the conversation. Kya, I feel like I still don't know you very well, but I follow the system on TikTok and am so happy to hear that posting content there is truly helping you. As a viewer, I could notice a difference but I'm so happy you have noticed as well! I'm not sure if you're the one still editing the videos, (kudos to whoever is) but thank you for leaving the footage of the conversation you had with Mara in there as well as the system disassociating. I know how both those interactions are personal and just want you to know we appreciate the system's vulnerability. :) Your system is doing so much good for the community. I know that Kya is their own person, but Nin and especially Kyle and Chole felt like friends of ours and miss them as we knew them. Being able to see parts of them in Kya gives me a sense of peace and comfort that they are still living their life, even if it isn't in the same form I met them in. I see so much of Kyle come through at 8:51- 9:03 when you're inspecting your makeup look, and the laugh at 9:02 was just so Chole with a sprinkle of Nin that filled my heart with such warmth, seeing a little snippet of an old friend. The system is so special and Im so glad that you are back confidently posting again! I've been here for a few years now and I'm just so proud of the system for the tenacity and bravery you've shown over the years and continue to show. Sending so much love and strength to Kya, and all members of the system! ❤💛❤

[@BudgetArts]

this is exactly how I feel too :) l like face timing a friend. I don't have any friends, so this is a nice feeling for me. I enjoy watching all the DID videos and hearing the alters talk :) I wish I could talk back

[@Azul_247]

this was a cool opurtunity to see a prosecuter! I havnt ever interacted with our prosecuter, apparently im "not alowed" and dont know that much about him. I find that i seem to learn the same amount from your videos as a singlet would learn, despite me being part of a system. have a good day mara, kya, and the rest of the system! Serafina looks adorable as always! much love, Charlie

[@Azul_247]

is this how i fucking find out i’m a system tf

[@hotlola2246]

​@Azul_247 that's crazy. and also kind of funny

[@RemoKnightNo1]

Blimey.....didn't see this coming. Just goes to show....the variations that can exist in systems. And yes I agree with some other comments, awesome look.

[@hayleyblevins]

as a makeup artist, i find your different alters makeup SOO FASCINATING! ESPECIALLY this one, this alter is REALLY talented! so interesting they have different levels of experience it almost seems, i think the way she did the eyeshadow is very very interesting, i haven’t seen another one of your alters do anything like this. everything that makes you all of you is incredible to me!

[@NoeDactyl]

I know right! They talk through their makeup as well!

[@minixmousy]

there's something both unnerving about the way mara stares directly into the camera but also something about it that makes me not want to look away. it feels like she's staring directly at me despite the fact that she definitely isn't. also, i can tell seraphina is going to be a great emotional support / therapy for you all! especially since she's already able to sense when you need her from so far away.

[@allisondiaz1319]

Hi Mara, it’s nice to meet you! Thank you for sharing yourself with us 🥰 I hope everyone in the system is healthy, happy, and safe! 💕 thank you all for continuing to make videos after everything that’s happened to you over the years. As someone who’s watched your videos since early 2020, I’ve grown to adore you all and love watching all of your videos! Sending you so much love, as usual

[@DissociaDID]

Thank you for watching, I'm glad our videos are helping and all our love back! ❤️

[@allisondiaz1319]

@@DissociaDID thank you so much for responding!! 💜💜💜 I just got to the part where you so generously and selflessly shared part of your trauma. I’m so, SO happy to hear you’re feeling better through sharing on Tik Tok. I follow you there as well, and I see so much strength in your vulnerability when you post those videos and in the videos themselves. You all are so, so brave! It takes immense strength and courage to share things like that. I’m so deeply sorry those things and more happened to you, but I’m so SO proud of you for being so strong! The world dealt you a tough hand, but you’re way tougher!! You’re all AMAZING 🤩🤍

[@pumpkinspice1999]

My god, Mara seems so badass and cool. I love her voice and the way she talks. She definitely seems like she has been through stuff and is doing her best. Also Kya, you're amazing and you seem so kind and your energy just gives off something so calming idek 🥺 I wish you guys the best

[@jenrivera5893]

i just wanna say that I'm really glad the system made the choice to post this. I don't doubt that this video was a challenge to the system in vulnerability. Since Mara is a part of the system, seeing her on the channel, in a way that feels safe for everyone, is really nice. Im glad we got to meet you, Mara.

[@DissociaDID]

Big challenge, and thank you ❤️

[@EmeisterKav]

My family collectively calls our persecutor gollum. I’m going into psychology and I’m hoping to get a clinical psychologist job and license. My look on people is not that of a book but a painting. And it’s amazing to see different artists painting on one canvas. I’m sorry if Mara was causing stress but it’s nice in a way to see people aren’t alone with their own, darker alter. But it’s refreshing to see one like yourselves bring awareness to mental health like this. It helps me calm down and just, you know, listen. I’ve always been interested is the art/science of psychology, and I’m never going to stop trying to study and hopefully help down the line. To nudge the world more into seeking help and healthy coping mechanisms. I’ve seen trauma as a broken limb and seen ones I love walk on that leg for years before they get proper medical attention; and they have to rebreak the bone. It’s agonizing for so many, but with time they will be able to walk. Sometimes the pins will pop out and need to be screwed in again. Long rant short, thank you for encouraging me to move forward and march towards my PhD!❤

[@glitch7708]

“No god put me here. Humans put me here” resonates sooooooo fucking much. Like no the person I am today isn’t because of some god. It’s because of the way humans treated me

[@emmanoel4876]

You can sense the pain she’s feeling so deeply just watching Mara.

[@sentientplant9658]

I'm so glad Maeri convinced you guys to go through with adopting Seraphina. Just from this video alone, I can tell she's done wonders for you guys and understands her purpose.

[@Birdsong231]

I haven't a clue how Mara is doing now, but I do feel like she wanted to have a moment to be heard in this video. Someone that'll just...listen to her story. Her feelings. That's my read on her, at least. Also, I gotta say... That make-up is so cool!

[@feerieslittleworld7855]

Mara seems to be a bad alter even if she's "in rehab" she still threatened Kya and didn't seem to give two shits although it would've been interesting to hear her word but she's still potentially harmful to the body.

[@calimorales9880]

@@feerieslittleworld7855 Yeah, she's cool from what we were able to se, but I won't doubt their word that mara was very harmful to them

[@LennyPepper]

I hope Mara makes another appearance on the channel!

[@lizbeals3631]

Kya, I love how you reached out to Mara personally through the video. To know they are wanted in the chat and how to communicate to others openly. I just thought it was so cool! Mara, loved the make up it was fantastic!

[@Feverm00n]

I’m sorry that certain pockets of the internet have given you shit for talking about your own trauma on your own personal TikTok. I saw it happening and it was so frustrating to see. But I was glad to see people speaking up for you as well. I think it’s great that you’ve found an outlet to talk about that stuff, and I hope it continues to help you 💜

[@carrinwesson9965]

2:14 "Her outlook on the world, friendship, trust and people is aggressively negative." I don't blame her at all for that

[@Haikulapsi]

It's so interesting to hear the infuence of American accent in Mara's speech! Also the make up is on point