Actually making THAT chess cheat device

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Amidst the cheating controversy that, at the time of publishing, is still unfolding in the chess world between Hans Niemann, Magnus Carlsen and chess.com, I thought I'd try and see if "that" cheat device is actually possible. How easy is it to make? Can it actually be used to defeat high level players? Can I, a programming and electronics n00b make one? Let's find out.
Thanks to Michael Groves for being a good sport and playing so well against Stockfish. He has his own drone company. Check it out here: www.broadwingmedia.co.uk/
I've uploaded my code here:
github.com/MikeBoydCode/Chess...
The original Python programme which I then edited for this project:
github.com/fsmosca/Python-Eas...
Game 1 (Device OFF, Mike Boyd as white):
1. d4 g6 2. Nf3 Bg7 3. g3 Nf6 4. c3 O-O 5. e3 c5 6. Bd3 d6 7. O-O Bg4 8. Nbd2
Nc6 9. h3 Bxh3 10. Re1 Bg4 11. b4 cxb4 12. cxb4 Nxb4 13. Qb3 Nxd3 14. Qxd3 Qa5
15. Nh2 Be6 16. e4 Rfc8 17. d5 Nxd5 18. exd5 Bf5 19. Qe3 Bxa1 20. Qxe7 Qxd5
21. Nb3 Bh3 22. f3 Be5 23. Ng4 Bxg4 24. fxg4 Re8 25. Qd7 Bd4+ 26. Be3 Bxe3+
27. Kf1 Qf3# *
Game 2 (Device ON, Mike Boyd as white):
1. d4 { book } 1... c5 2. Nf3 { book } 2... cxd4 3. Nxd4 { book } 3... Nf6 4. c4 { book } 4... e5 5. Nb5 { book } 5... d6 6. Bg5 Be7 7. Bxf6 gxf6 8. N5c3 Be6 9. Nd5 Nd7 10. e3 f5 11. Be2 Nf6 12. Nbc3 Rg8 13. O-O Kf8 14. b3 Rc8 15. Rc1 a6 16. Nxf6 Bxf6 17. Nd5 Be7 18. Qd2 Rg6 19. g3 Bg5 20. Rfd1 Kg7 21. Bh5 Rh6 22. Bf3 Bd7 23. Bg2 Bc6 24. Qc2 Bd7 25. f4 Bf6 26. Nxf6 Qxf6 27. Bxb7 Rc7 28. Bf3 Qe7 29. Rd2 Rg6 30. Rcd1 exf4 31. exf4 Qe3+ 32. Rf2 Kf8 33. Qd3 Qc5 34. Qc3 Kg8 35. Rd5 Qb6 36. Qd4 Qb4 37. Kg2 Qa3 38. Qd2 Rb7 39. Ra5 Qb4 40. Rxa6 d5 41. Qxb4 Rxb4 42. Rxg6+ hxg6 43. Bxd5 Kf8 44. Rd2 Ke7 45. Kf2 Rb8 46. Bf3 Rh8 47. Ke3 Ke6 48. Kd4 Kd6 49. b4 Kc7 50. Kc5 Re8 51. b5 Bc8 52. Bc6 1-0
Video edited by @Kim_Norrie (Kim Boyd)

[@MikeBoyd]

Putting this comment here for discussion: Do you think Hans cheated over the board? If so... how? Do you think the way the media and the chess community has handled this is fair?

[@rjfaber1991]

I just think that if you are going to be involved in a cheating scandal, whether guilty or not, you should probably work on your facial expressions and interview techniques to come off as slightly less sus...

[@RinInABin]

Magnus was definitely a bit of a diva about it, cheating or no Big fan of the man but resigning after move 2 was kind of uncalled for

[@john_voske]

It's just... Watching him in other matches playing strong but far from perfect, it's just a really tough buy. His match against Hans was absolutely perfect.

[@philurbaniak1811]

Carlsen cheated by using his meta knowledge of Niemann's cheating to intentionally throw the game 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@MikeBoyd]

I also think this has contributed to the media turning against him. Which is a shame as he is a chess player, not an actor.

[@meestyouyouestme3753]

“It was an honor losing to you.” “Please, the pleasure was all mine.”

[@far2go375]

Up you go

[@Weegeethegod69]

@@Thatwasepic34 bot

[@wind_traveler]

Lmao

[@malegria9641]

I’m getting the holy water

[@TommyTheCow13]

@@malegria9641 don't forget the holy hand grenade

[@jimphilidor9031]

I think the most logical solution would be that each competitor uses a standardized big buttplug that prevents them from inserting any unofficial buttplugs in their bumbums. This would level out the playing field tremendously.

[@auliamate]

lmfaoo?????

[@xleplayVA]

Or: mandatory mid-game anal inspections, public tsa style.

[@IAmGodHimself777]

@@auliamate what?

[@josephjoestar953]

There also needs to be a full-body strip search to make sure the standardized big buttplug is there.

[@kevinrawding6730]

😂 fucking genius

[@davidstojcevski4810]

I found this exact cheating chess device in my moms bedroom the other day. I still can't believe she's a cheater

[@Tailspin80]

More cougar than cheetah.

[@kingo5940]

@@Tailspin80 get out

[@TuristaArcsi]

@@Tailspin80 loool😅😂

[@CheshireCad]

No, no, don't be silly. That's just a sex toy. But the one your *dad* has is a cheating device. That's why it's the size of a soda can.

[@Lightninglord12]

I don't think that's what it's for my guy

[@max_hairloss]

Finally, SOMEONE was brave enough to show us how its done

[@tomchandler5907]

not rlly - he just stuck it to his leg

[@sameer209]

Not brave enough to put it in 🤣

[@ColonelSandersLite]

@@sameer209 That's kind of a core problem with the general idea. You would have to have one hell of a poker face for this to work.

[@sameer209]

@@ColonelSandersLite not if you're gay enough

[@CrippleStick12]

I Did A Thing already did this, Mike just straight up copied his video.

[@penedrador]

Winning that game of chess must have been a pain in the ass

[@warau.exe2]

Lmao, underrated comment

[@Yukki64_]

lmao

[@yeetyeet7070]

it's probably been a pleasure

[@zoikos2463]

Same.

[@lykaeon8082]

And then you lose that game because stockfish got outplayed

[@enormhi]

Okay, but we need a volunteer to REALLY test the device in the intended place.

[@lewissmith5759]

I volunteer as tribute

[@saigonrider]

reddit would be a nice place to find them

[@TheOriginalIBT]

@@lewissmith5759 me too, wanna duel for the opportunity

[@texillaa]

@@TheOriginalIBT Perhaps you two could sword fight.. if you know what i mean

[@TheOriginalIBT]

@@texillaa i was thinking about a duel where our piss streams would meet and see whose is stronger, kind of like voldemort and harry potter in the movies

[@juke9674]

I think having superglue directly interacting with your butt chemistry is a terrible idea. Its like a vodka tampon but worse

[@sleepysera]

Can't you just put a condom on it?

[@quinnobi42]

Agreed. When I saw he had just cut one in half instead of making a mold of it properly, I was concerned. I was more concerned when he showed he had used super glue to put it back together. Thankfully he didn't actually 'use' it. It makes the most sense to me that if you actually wanted to make one of those to use, you would want to create a mold and make a custom silicone piece that the electronics fit nicely into, or are otherwise just molded straight into.

[@paulthomas8262]

Interesting fact super glue was developed to stick skin together. There is still the medical version of CA used to this day by doctors and surgeons. Still not recommended for *that* area.

[@paulthomas8262]

@@quinnobi42 make sure you use medical grade silicone ;)

[@Gustoberg]

@@paulthomas8262 does it glue your ass together?

[@lottafandoms]

I will refuse to believe ANY of the devices results until someone actually puts it in it's INTENDED SPOT

[@MrCh0o]

@@mildlyinvested2992 I'm sorry, my version uses a 1.5m Bad Dragon dildo as a base, would that be a problem?

[@mildlyinvested2992]

@@MrCh0o damn, you know about bad dragon? Mike Boyd's got some freak-a-leaks in his community, lol.

[@heretichazel]

@@mildlyinvested2992 to be fair I think just knowing about their existence isn't too uncommon, it's actually owning their products that counts -totally not one of those people, nope-

[@mildlyinvested2992]

@@heretichazel I wanna be one of those people, low-key. Sounds like fun, from what I've heard. -Which one do you have-

[@auliamate]

@@mildlyinvested2992 LMFAO

[@InformatrIIcks]

The article that first mentioned "vibrating anal beads" also mentioned "vibrating shoe sole" as a cheating method... Which is simpler to make and less "intrusive" if i might say so. But the internet completely forgot about that other suggestion and went crazy for the anal beads hypothesis 😂

[@chrisvighagen]

yeah but here's why that's not as good of a way to cheat. Just ask everyone to play shoeless. Buttplug means you gotta get more invasive in your search. Im not even sure you would detect it with a metal detector if you make your own flexboards and mould it yourself. I'd put the on off button as an smd button in the nose of the plug. with nothing metallic being outside the body, would it be picked up by a metall detector? I dont know.

[@InformatrIIcks]

@@chrisvighagen the issue with cheating in chess doesn't really have to do with how "detectable" the cheating device is. The real problem is livestreaming it, which allows a friend to plot in the AI every move. You could make an underskin chip made entirely of plastic, if there's a 15min delay in the Livestream it's completely useless. A shoe was more likely used. More space, less intrusive, no weird walk, no moaning during play ... A vibrating buttplug is funny but filled with disadvantages compared to any other vibrating apparatus ... As was clearly demonstrated in this video by just taping it to a leg

[@aozzya1563]

@@InformatrIIcks what if you had a way of inputting the moves to the beads? Like you clench your ass in a pattern and it sends that move to the computer which then tells you what to do. Or maybe even have the computer inside the beads so it doesn’t have to send any information

[@chrisvighagen]

@@InformatrIIcks I agree. Could also possiblybe in a belt. a letrher belt and a custom flexboard with a small actuater, linear or rotary could easily be made if you had the investment in to. Might be a couple of thousand usd, but the pay off would be huge if undetected.

[@InformatrIIcks]

@@aozzya1563 well i think that tapping your foot or pressing a button with your toe would be just as efficient and much less likely to be detected 😂

[@ChrisRamsay52]

Part of me believed you were going to insert the "Thing"

[@meme-hj5rs]

wondering what part of you was believing that

[@patstaysuckafreeboss8006]

That’s how you make ‘em disappear huh, Chris?

[@Kiiiyoshiii]

We all wanted to believe it.

[@gamer9smith]

@@Kiiiyoshiii what do you mean by that

[@ZEbelgiumfreak]

Deep down, I knew he wouldn't.

[@qchtohere8636]

Referees in a few years: "Ok guys, this is an officially sanctioned tournament. You know what that means." **Fits glove**

[@sakuranatsume6347]

Underrated

[@TheRealScooterGuy]

If the stakes are high enough, someone could have a device surgically implanted.

[@felix.mp3639]

@@TheRealScooterGuyalright guys *gets scalpel*

[@UnicaLuce]

@@felix.mp3639 *pulls out xray machine* well guys, it's not gonna be any more different than your normal airport security check, but this time you're going to be the luggage

[@milodavis1]

This would have been great for an Adam and Eve sponsorship

[@visitorccb968]

😂😂😂

[@nastyasfrick]

Imagine Hans Niemann streams sponsored by bad dragon lmao

[@user-A54AX]

😂

[@JustIsold]

I hope Mike realises this but I just have to say for anyone else trying this, if you've cut the silicone it's not body safe any more so please do not put it in any body cavities.

[@Oretal]

Thanks for the heads up

[@ashedaces]

thanks bro i’ll keep that in mind when making my own 👍

[@thenachothief]

@zsazsa m. 🤨

[@riceandcheese1463]

Andddddd there goes my weekend plans

[@rickyorgason2448]

You might be surprised by how many things end up in body cavities that aren't body safe o_o

[@bobbobson2291]

Garry Chess, inventor of chess, would be so proud

[@hypercane2023]

True

[@KevinOMalleyisonlysmallreally]

And I'm sure that his spouse and muse Mary Chess would be delighted

[@breakinglegsandbreakinghea3167]

The name Jonathan followed by almost any brand or game name somehow works. Jonathan Chess, Jonathan Gucci, Jonathan Ford, etc.

[@Bzorlan]

Garry chess is the modded version with the physics gun and chess:source assets

[@domc3743]

pure anarchy

[@nicolasgimenezo.0503]

Omg i want "that" chess cheat device so bad.... For scientific purposes of course.

[@Mr_MacMiller]

Welp, a rule34 comment somehow got into KZbin

[@krahser6914]

It’s not safe to use cause the silicone is punctured. So basically don’t stick it up your a-

[@AroRalseiWithADoubleSpace]

Sure… “scientific purposes”…

[@f.p.2463]

@@AroRalseiWithADoubleSpace Of course, what other purpose will it serve

[@burushifudara]

@@krahser6914 Okay, I know that is a good reason I just wanna know *why* exactly

[@vorobuh_the_1]

When he said “more than a thousand years has gone, relatively speaking, without drama, until now. Here’s a recap” i thought man was about to recap all of chess history

[@nikk-named]

I'd have been there for that, actually

[@ghughus]

This video has some serious Internet Historian vibes and I'm all for it.

[@MikeBoyd]

Huge inspiration!

[@Epic501]

Chess. What IS chess?

[@yawnick408]

Is THIS a chess?

[@justsomeguy8982]

Why is CHESS?

[@Gr0nal]

I did a thing, too

[@Freakinawesome333]

5:38 I'd like to imagine that this is all true, and there was a moment during production of the... "device" when Hans was told, to his horror, "We're gonna need a bigger butt plug."

[@samwellick1706]

😂😂😂

[@oasntet]

Presumably the 'production' device wouldn't have a full arduino dev board, just the microcontroller, antenna and mosfet are needed. And probably a much smaller battery, after having moved even more of the work off the device and into the external cheat engines.

[@fan9775]

Horror?

[@Freakinawesome333]

@@fan9775 I guess it could have been delight, who knows? 😏

[@ubermenschmexa]

While the buttplug idea is fun to think about, I choose to believe the same principle was applied in a less intrusive and more comfortable way, such as in a shoe insole or in a device taped to a leg lol

[@cly_]

get it surgically implanted under a fake skin graft for the ultimate cheating potential

[@ironicdivinemandatestan4262]

They already caught a chess grandmaster named Borislav Ivanov cheating by putting a vibrating device in his shoe, so that plan is a no-go.

[@ubermenschmexa]

@@ironicdivinemandatestan4262 Wasn't aware of that

[@fknfoolish]

I think a shoe insole in an buttholemwould hurt more

[@cosmix_toast]

but its funnier that way

[@VortexKiller2]

If he moves his knight to G-4, does that mean he has successfully found the G Spot?

[@the_parkourguy2879]

underrated comment tbh

[@Savajam]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Dream-Academy]

No G6 and later G9 pushes the right bottom!

[@rosscoghlan]

I like this new style Mike. Investigative journalism meets challenge video.

[@skultikofficial]

These kinds of videos are just kings of youtube, so a good move from him

[@intruder9127]

@modest mouse colored person good punishment

[@occamshalberd2313]

Mike has acquired skills in engineering, chess, programming, and pleasing his wife and found the perfect way to combine the four.

[@vaaaali]

That's four mate

[@vignetter4802]

you mean four

[@occamshalberd2313]

@@vignetter4802 I threw in pleasing his wife last second and forgot to update the count. Oof.

[@mynameissang]

@@occamshalberd2313 should have just played it off bro, I thought THAT was the joke lol

[@erlendbanken6517]

@@mynameissang how is that a joke?

[@Uatemydoodle]

I can just imagine Magnus thinking: Why the fuck are my knees wet?

[@rinreborn7364]

Why wet? Tf

[@realzeno_]

@@rinreborn7364 cum there

[@mickeyp6639]

@@rinreborn7364 It was a shit joke about hans cumming

[@ariawatson_]

@@rinreborn7364 innocent soul

[@llawliet7434]

​​@@rinreborn7364 try to think about it again, please respond if you discovered it.

[@oliversmeeton]

Just make chess players go through security checks before the match then play the actual match inside a opaque Faraday cage with only the players and a camera inside

[@qchtohere8636]

Next up: Cheater figures way to report moves to custom Pi Pico build using sphincter. Drama ensues.

[@oliversmeeton]

@@qchtohere8636 In an attempt to bypass the Faraday cage a cheater has used a pi zero for local processing and was resultantly burned by the SoC.

[@allisonsomething3397]

if they're inside a faraday cage, how would the camera work?

[@seowonmin223]

@@allisonsomething3397 a faraday cage would block incoming and outgoing signals, not the actual electronics inside, i believe

[@oliversmeeton]

@@seowonmin223 yep the camera could still record to sd or even output via a cable, the Faraday cage only blocks wireless signal/communication entering or leaving

[@cheezyandgreasy]

Magnus said when playing his own AI “its like competing against an idiot genius.” That’s why it will always be suspicious playing AI generated moves, as the chess player said you’re “hanging on by a thread” while also making impossibly solid moves

[@banoodel5121]

Yeah right. Also, the AI will generate the scenario based on the opponents moves, so it doesn‘t have a plan, where as a human player, as Michael said, has a plan (for the endgame for example)

[@Goldap1000]

"but" program could help you by suggesting moves instead of just giving best answer.

[@undeniablySomeGuy]

that's why computer evals can be so strange sometimes. The eval will go 10 in white's favor, but that's only because it's evaluating based on the one move that completely saves your position, but if you miss that one move (or even like a 5 move sequence) then you're totally losing

[@annaclarafenyo8185]

Magnus was talking about pre-neural-net dee 1990s style engines, which had no long-term strategic ideas of their own, but simply created genius 20-move tactics to wriggle out of any situation. It's like playing a strategic idiot who beats you every time. Magnus DOESN'T SAY THAT anymore, because the chess engines underwent a revolution with Deep Mind and neural nets, and started playing strategically about 4 years ago. Since then, Magnus has been the quickest to adapt the new ideas coming from the neural nets, and he publicly admires the playing of neural net engines.

[@cheezyandgreasy]

@@annaclarafenyo8185 Idk about 1990s engines…He was speaking about playing his own “Play Magnus” app which came out in the last 5 years I think.

[@bigheadrhino]

Hikaru Nakamura said that at the Grandmaster level it would only take a single buzz at a critical position. Just the awareness that a game changing move exists on that turn would be enough and a player at that level would be able to find it.

[@quibble9003]

hikaru knows top level chess is more nuanced than that. he's just mad abt the lawsuit.

[@RyanC232]

Knowing that you need to spend time to find a tactic would be enough for a 1300. Imagine a super GM

[@jonassanoj3045]

@@quibble9003 even if he's wrong, this video shows that it's possible in theory. PS.: emphasis on "theory", given that there is zero evidence of over-the-board cheating by niemann.

[@quibble9003]

@@jonassanoj3045 have i ever said otb cheating was impossible?

[@arthurdequeiroz8393]

@@quibble9003 he said that multiple times before the lawsuit you goober lmao And to clarify he didn't say he would win every game with that, it would just be a huge advantage

[@tigertoxins584]

My grandmother grew up in Uzbekistan in the soviet era, and all they had to do way out in the sticks was work and play chess, so everyone in her family was a pro, including her. She's a selfish and selfless woman to a fault who loved hiding behind her work, as woman were forced into that role there, but there was one thing that showed her true colors, which was chess. She put an absurd amount of pride on chess. I always lost to her as a child and every single time it was painful, until I started to learn how to play chess. I matched her, and eventually beat her. We began playing more often and I only got better. Eventually, she got to experience the pure rage and grief that comes with properly losing a chess match and she started to cheat, very simply at first. Moving pieces to where they couldn't go, like a knight harmlessly being placed in the wrong path that put a fork between two good pieces, or moving her own pieces ever so slightly. It came to a point where I was remembering every single piece on the board and calling her out every time she cheated. It was funny at first, but I lost my shit when she pulled out her final strat, a truly unbeatable cheating technique if your opponent doesn't remember the board. She pretended to knock some pieces over, and of course she was the one to put them back, closer to my side of the board, or just somewhere else where she benefited. I stopped playing chess with her after that.

[@LeafBro_]

So it was… online? Sorry i read eveything but i think I missed something😅

[@LeafBro_]

If she did play otb she most likely lost the first few games but got better and showed her true self after that

[@tigertoxins584]

@@LeafBro_ its otb on a chess board I made, she's a sore loser

[@Ten_Thousand_Locusts]

Selfish and selfless are two absolute opposites, so how can she be both?

[@CountingStars333]

@@Ten_Thousand_Locusts Probably some language barrier or error

[@canadiangopnik7007]

so is every chess tournament going to require a full cavity search from now on?

[@windwaker0rules]

i think they will just start requiring tight shorts and singlets

[@TheBenjaman]

From now on they will be playing chess in the nude, sitting on glass chairs, with a camera underneath it.

[@you.findbitches6054]

@@TheBenjaman imagine you get caught watching a replay lmao.

[@Tailspin80]

@@you.findbitches6054 This is bad enough. Now, how do I edit my KZbin history?

[@Kahhru]

Frequency signal jammers would be one solution. Then have them play inside an opaque box to prevent any visual input from the outside.

[@frequensea9434]

“My chess speaks for itself” while he quickly turtle walks to the shitter

[@WestonNey]

We all know why 😅

[@BriefOutreach]

that vibrating chess spoke pretty well

[@zayd162]

I love how semi serious he is while making a sex toy into a cheating device.

[@BarackObamaJedi]

Semi lol

[@marielcarey4288]

I think it's more completely serious since he actually made THAT device

[@mariokarter13]

If you're "trained," using beads is even faster because *where* it vibrates can give you even more information.

[@zayd162]

@@mariokarter13 LOL sounds like you tested that bro, come on man it's NNN you can't be doin that

[@Chico_Julio]

Well on high level chess tournaments, there's money involved. Not a small quantity

[@Trashley652]

If that's actually how he cheated, he deserves to get away with it

[@dxdxdxdxdxd7125]

and on the next tournament there will be buzzing heard from all the corners

[@SneakyMango]

As much as I disagree, I still gotta give this comment a like 💀

[@samoak123]

I'd do it at the casino

[@SuperDZ555]

Obviously the best strategy is to eat the pieces while nobody is looking

[@Nerdforge]

10/10 storytelling! We have been waiting eagerly for this one, and it exceeded our expectations! 😂

[@ghosthunter0950]

idk why I didn't expect you guys here. makes me happy when so many communities that I follow like chess, art & cosplay and more random things like Mike Boyd suddenly become involved with each other.

[@adrijabhattacharyya]

Reading the nerdforge comment here was a treat ❤❤🤟🤟

[@shihabsinha5497]

@@ghosthunter0950 Nerdforge are Norwegian just supporting Magnus Carlson, I reckon

[@davidbakke9293]

Hey nerd forge!

[@tong8619]

Hey what you doing here :O I love your crafting videos so much!

[@Younex]

How to be a *Chess GM* Before 2022 : *wide* knowledge of Openings, Middle and End games 🧠 After 2022 : *wide* Ass Hole! 🕳️

[@MasoHQlC5GW5btFZ]

LMAO

[@aXelRedfield]

wide openings

[@_egghead]

@@aXelRedfield 😆

[@ChefofWar33]

Tbf. There is another less exciting theory that he used an emplacement within his shoes. Just as sensitive, but far less intrusive, and far easier to hide when walking and standing.

[@JamesTDG]

Honestly, I wanna figure out every single possible way to cheat in chess

[@end.olives]

There are probably many ways and the anal beads theory is just the meme version. Like it would he enough to have a little buzzing thing on your jeans.

[@end.olives]

As you could see in this video, the actual anal beads was just excess mass, you could put the whole system inside a hidden pocket on your clothes easy

[@taliesine.8343]

There was a team competition I believe in 2022 where the coach would stand in certain spots in the room to convey the moves. In the room where two ranks of eight boards, which made it perfect to convey moves. In a critical situation, the coach would move to one board in the first to indicate the rank and then move to the other row to indicate the rank. Now you have the target square of the best move in the position. The players are good enough to figure out which piece to move to the target square. This also only worked because Coaches where allowed to have phones at the tournament. They where caught relatively quickly, because the chess players performance was unusually high and way better than past performances. With those added suspicions the pattern of the coach was also caught.

[@parthsavyasachi9348]

Also have to figure out how to let stockfish crutch numbers to the depth of 50 and almost instantly make moves too. Simple stuff really.

[@dozydoe5245]

Actually, there are butt plugs that can be used through apps to control pulsing to such a degree that you can probably do morse code with it because its so customizable that people submit their own custom settings to a list for sharing or keeping it private and theyre meant for long distance relationships or swingers that wanna tell people what butt vibes get them off so you didnt have to hacksaw and glue this one together just for any sort of future reference. i cant space out my sentences but but i dont want anyone to risk supergluing their asshole shut in the name of chess championship titles, happy beading- i mean cheating.

[@pinkie723]

wait, why cant you space out your sentences? 👀

[@burneraccount7831]

@@stuwest5862 nah, it's fr. There's even paired vibes and sleeves that interact with each other (I assume one is on a receive and the other is on react mode)

[@kingo5940]

@@burneraccount7831 wait what bro

[@JackTheFoxVA]

The problem is that all of those devices require phones to receive and transmit the signals. Im pretty sure Hans wasnt allowed to have his phone on him.

[@emmanon6664]

😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

[@FrenchGuyCooking]

That's just painful dedication right here. Great ep

[@Jason-gq8fo]

I see your KZbin taste is as good as your food taste. Love the vids

[@bagieta7]

what are you doing here

[@fsilvruiz]

Alex!!!

[@NomadicWVR]

@Alex I see you too are a man of culture😂

[@OmnifyMyAss]

I see you're a true connoisseur of all kinds of salt 😁

[@batates74]

This gives a whole new meaning to embedded systems

[@MrCh0o]

Integrated peripherals

[@pinkie723]

oh noooooo lmaooooo XD

[@burneraccount7831]

Intel Inside 😉

[@MihailDadun]

internal library

[@mmesamesa]

Plug and Play

[@FlameQwert]

What really surprises me is that the old standby of many players saying "I can just feel he's cheating, the moves don't feel right" is proveñ demonstrated here

[@danbrown6210]

Genuinely thought that you were going to take one for the team for a moment there.

[@ZeleonScience]

Seeing Michael pick up on something fishy as the game progresses is honestly hella interesting! You can see how tense he looks not because of the pressure you are putting on him, but also because it doesn't feel right to him.

[@tombladon8064]

I've played against cheats online and you get a feeling about it fairly quickly. It feels suffocating and nothing you do works but that is also how playing really good players feels too. The main difference is there are moves that seem totally silly that you will never really understand played, also they take 10 seconds to calculate the most complicated move, and also 10 seconds to make the blindingly obvious move. In this particular case it would be even more obvious as he'd just played a fairly poor game just 5 minutes beforehand.

[@jhudson_tiedye]

perhaps the same way magnus felt

[@NigelTolley]

@@jhudson_tiedye yep. The lack of pressure shown by Magnus' opponent was insane. Very like watching this match, in fact.

[@emperorsascharoni9577]

Yeah thats why it would be way less suspicious to use ai based engines that play like a human would and not in this impossibly calculated way that stockfish uses. Stockfish often uses a line that has only 1 right solution so making even a slight mistake would be detrimental and noone would play the line if they didnt fully calculate it first. Now when you play such a line without thinking long when there is a line thats much easier to play and just as good or nearly as good or would even seem better when you havent calculated the hard one then it becomes very suspicious. One example would be Leela Chess Zero but while this ai plays like a human it isnt up to the task of beating a world champion. Depends on the training time obviously. The better the ai gets the less human it plays.

[@ReiMizere]

16:32 Not only your moves were too strong for you rating, but sometimes the AI just makes a move that humans wouldn't make. Specially moves that get you compensation way later or moves that just improve your position without it being immediately apparent

[@LoganCovers91]

This. If you want to do it right, you tune the engine to not give such perfect moves, and throw some innacuracy in there. Everyone would notice these moves are cheating.

[@lred1383]

@@LoganCovers91 The problem is, with the Niemann situation that would not give him any advantage. At top GM level "some inaccuracy" is often enough to lose the game

[@kevinmiller218]

@@lred1383 I think he meant that the play should be something between magnus and stockfish. Even with "some inaccuracy" moves stockfish would beat magnus 99/100 times if hans cheated. Yes at top GM level "some inaccuracy" is often enough to lose the game but stockfish could blunder first couple moves and still win easily.

[@sublivion5024]

AI also has a tendency to focus on a secure win, rather than a fast or crushing victory like a human would, as it is only trained to win and not given additional points for winning strongly. This seems to be consistent with what his opponent was saying.

[@sublivion5024]

You could probably determine whether he was cheating by playing his moves to known algorithms (whether AI or human written), or analysing his different games to see if there is a change in play style or any pattern

[@sebastianfries274]

Did this to my friend (with a phone) and he was really confused because the first time I played with him I played by checkers rules :)

[@aseheavyindustries798]

yeah....with a phone

[@michealpersicko9531]

​@@aseheavyindustries798 if you insert it vertically and not horizontally it can fit. Remember the human anus can stretch up to 8 in before you run the risk of tearing it.

[@volumist]

@@michealpersicko9531 i thought he hooked device on his knee...

[@archietheproto7706]

I've always liked magnus, but the fact he could tell he was playing against a computer with such conviction mid game is astounding.

[@donmiller2908]

"but the fact he could tell he was playing against a computer with such conviction" That's the problem isn't it? Knowing something and proving it are two different things. Maybe Carlsen was having a bad day and Neimann was having a great day. It could happen. I believe it's just ego talking when Carlsen quit, saying in effect "I'm Magus Carlsen, never in this Universe will I ever be beaten by Hans Neimann, so he cheated" Which is why Neimannn is suing for defamation of character right? Carlsen cannot prove his allegation. You don't get to damage someones reputation because you "Think they cheated"

[@trank3166]

@@donmiller2908 while that is true you can't be sure someone cheated, there are signs that you are playing against a bot. For an example, moving a king in a perfectly safe spot one tile to the side so you don't get put in check while trying to checkmate your opponent 25 moves ahead

[@donmiller2908]

@@trank3166 Yes, and I read that masters know pretty much which are valid strong moves so they tend to make them quickly. If someone is taking a long time to make an obvious move, they're probably using a computer.

[@snorttroll4379]

@@donmiller2908 nah. they looked at the numbers and statistics.

[@donmiller2908]

@@snorttroll4379 I saw another video created by a lawyer who said that Neimann is going to have a hard time getting anywhere with his lawsuit and he's pretty much done for reputation wise, which is a shame because flukes happen. Any Grandmaster can beat Carlsen, He just has to play exceptionally well on a day when Carlsen is playing exceptionally poorly, which can happen, flukes happen. I don't think you should be able to label a person a cheat without proof, especially when it could damage their career.

[@DylanODonnell]

You Hans Neiman'ed your poor mate! Props to him for taking it so well. I could see him going through the emotions and his rating is amazing!

[@MikeBoyd]

He’s a good sport!

[@andrewdunbar828]

Should've invited Hans Niemann over instead of that guy (-:

[@draganitaalex8324]

H8 moves made him orgasm i think

[@Nobody-df4is]

Michael played pretty good against the engine.

[@tijsp.8162]

Huh, didn't expect to see you here. Or maybe I should've haha Anyway, just wanted to say I love your channel! Already looking forward to your next video

[@markus9020]

As soon as I saw this in my notifications the sudden realization came to me and now I can't stop laughing thinking about what you've just created

[@matsukoffee]

Imagine getting beaten this way💀

[@garethbaus5471]

When your opponent suddenly pulls moves out of his ass that are inhumanly good.

[@WattWireNet]

The exchange, "That was a really good move." / "I know, that's why I played it." had me dying. To me, that would have been a sure giveaway.

[@SUPERMAR10312]

For future note. Silicone sticks really well to itself. So next time you can use silicone caulk ( should be body safe if actually intended for use lol) instead of super glue.

[@Glitch-Gremlin]

Or use some of Smooth-On's Equinox Silicone Putty. you mix A and B together, then you can model it in your hands into a small Ball that could Coat the electronic, thus making it easy to insert and you could still feel it, without it being "Exposed" more-so, its Food Safe so it wouldn't be Dangerous like Caulk.

[@DarkMoon095]

How about using a real CAULK ?

[@akronikw]

@@DarkMoon095 💀💀💀

[@v4714v]

NICE CAULK

[@tri--light]

@@DarkMoon095 i need caulk for my deck

[@gregorioeduardo]

Anyone doing this at home, make sure the superglue is dried before you test out your new play thing 👿

[@naverilllang]

If it's still wet, you can use it as lube to help it go in

[@garethbaus5471]

That just brought an insanely painful set of imagery to my mind.

[@agustusfarnworth3379]

Oh god no

[@ebixxdracion]

No one seems to realise that you could just wrap it in a condom or something to keep from having direct interaction with your inner lining.

[@Thisguy2736]

@@naverilllang that would most likely result In a embarrassing emergency room visit

[@levd4685]

i suddenly wanna play chess

[@ImKrazyFrench]

There's one precision I would add to the scandal scheme. At their level, they don't need that much information to cheat. All they need is a simple buzz that indicate whether or not a critical move must be done in a specific position. They're just that good at chess. They feel when the position is tense, but they don't absolutely know if there is a critical move to be done. A simple buzz can give them the cue to search for a single winning move that requires to invest more time into calculating their options. Hikaru Nakamura talked about it on Lex Fridman' Podcast. I recommend

[@ImKrazyFrench]

Ok, I should of scrolled down a bit more before writing such a long comment. SMH.

[@theplayer178]

i saw alot of people trying to make "THAT chess cheat device" and byfar yours is the most realistic. It actually looks the most comfortable to sit on and honestly you have blown it out of the water with how ergonomically comfy it looks.

[@ChefofWar33]

Bruh. Calm down. I can see the tent from here.

[@totsuka2213]

@@ChefofWar33 it's for science :3

[@TurtleHouse]

Chill bro

[@danielprovost]

@@TurtleHouse daddy chill...

[@theplayer178]

@@TurtleHouse I need that in me now ;)

[@Zenterer]

He found a way to write off s**toys as business expenses

[@Zenterer]

@UCtv2K6EqP6DGyl5xmGEY3iw lmao, nice try scamming

Its fun how the brain works that I knew exactly what it was about the second I read the title xD

[@raboaton158]

9:32 "time to put it to the test" *unbuttons pants*

[@robin.r]

You know what you have just done? Every high grade chess tournament from now on will have someone checking each players „backdoor“ in case there’s a device like that in there. I think thats actually quite hilarious.

[@ninezerotwo1778]

I don’t think they’re going to be happy about needing to get fingered before every game.

[@mr.cauliflower3536]

Fide said they wouldn't do it.

[@justinjakeashton]

It ain't gay if it's TSA, I mean FIDE.

[@CRanunculus]

@@mr.cauliflower3536 They could use an x-ray or metal detector.

[@creatingbeautifulsongs7946]

Wouldn’t it be much easier to just delay the broadcast by a move, or just not let outside viewers watch live? No assistant means no cheating.

[@christopherneufelt8971]

I congratulate the sacrifices for science 🤣 at 10:41

[@rougenarwhal8378]

ah yes, "super glue" I guess that's a way to describe it

[@kendelbeard6627]

10:49 OH THANK GOD 😬😂

[@Falconer5752]

Yeah! Putting something covered in glue in your ass is like you're asking to have major health issues

[@exodus4405]

7 Years of Learning: How I Beat Hans Niemann at Chess

[@zman4002]

Well...this is not the video I was expecting to watch at 12 in the morning

[@karlnilsson8283]

He just casually drops the words “Butt Arduino” and expects everyone not to laugh hahahaha

[@KO47893]

They should have a chess match in a faraday cage to block a signal transmitting to any potential cheat devices.

[@grimoireapril9529]

This won't work. Consider a smartphone attatched with a sensor, picking up signals from your butt, and computing competely offline.

[@KO47893]

@@grimoireapril9529 In the hypothetical situation in which Hans wants to prove he's innocent by playing in a faraday cage, I'm sure they could take simple additional measures to assure the integrity of the match, like checking their phones. Also, kudos to anyone who can send a signal with their butt without any errors while under scrutiny.

[@iztihadfahim7053]

The beads speaks for itself.

[@andrewdunbar828]

Bzzzzt!

[@omegaomega3]

@@andrewdunbar828 no it's actually silent

[@andrewdunbar828]

@@omegaomega3 Shhhhh!

[@stephenshook2348]

😭😭

[@DanTheThirdy]

When your opponent does a wild play on you and your friends popping off with the remote in the back

[@arcofficial516]

This is very well produced videos. Kudos to editor and mike

[@goldenart1215]

I’ve been wondering what all the controversy around the cheating was ever since it started. I never thought THIS was the LEADING THEORY

[@jonas-om3th]

Its not. This story was something a chess streamer brought up as a joke and for some reason the media ran with it. There are many other ways cheating could be achived

[@emperorsascharoni9577]

Well the leading theory is just a concealed vibrating device. Another option would be the sole of his boots.

[@1stCallipostle]

As absurd as it sounds on paper, I can't think of much better ways to hide it Like yeah, the sole is probably more likely for now, but if this becomes a rampant thing, between the cheeks wouldn't take long to take off

[@yagnikbose8973]

This proves that chess grandmasters aren't just born-yesterday-talents, they reach their grandmaster status from immense practice and a MANY matches. You may beat them and they'll recognise it if you are truly as good as you seemed to be, but if you aren't legit, they'll probably be able to figure it out.

[@__8120]

3:22 I love that, I would also 100% watch that

[@alexandersze49]

I’m laughing my ass off just listening to Mike explaining the modes and strength of the anal toy 😂

[@jacobsotorios8886]

Pun intended?

[@hugomarchand756]

"If you're still watching now, you are a nerd" Thanks Mike, absolutely true

[@melody3741]

Never ever ever cut or glue silicone that will go inside you, EVER.

[@Luke-dj3ry]

Never again yeah

[@MouseGoat]

I honestly dont think Hans cheated, and the bug plot idea is just to freaking wild to be true. Yes its possible, its also possible Hans was alien all along, we really need a fair bit more than a meme and a odd set of events to prove anything here. And also at some point cheating stops being cheating if you cant proof the cheet.

[@midn8588]

The fact that Hans couldn't explain why he moved like he did combined with his insane accuracy and record of cheating is pretty good evidence

[@jackingwads7513]

@@midn8588 sounds like the guy is a sore looser and needs to get over himself he read him like a book and played appropriately now he's mad cause he's not as good as he thinks he is and acts like child when he knew he would loose was surprised he didn't flip the board too Cry some more looser

[@a.i.a3949]

@@midn8588 It suggests he could have been cheating, its not "evidence" at least not hard enough legal evidence.

[@alexblake5369]

@@a.i.a3949 It's a no win situation. The only way to have proved that Hans cheated would have been to conduct a body search of him right after the match so all you can go on is his weird behavior, history and a grand master chess player's instinct. With that said if Hans really did just get lucky then his career has just been destroyed for no reason so at the end of the day this whole situation is going to feel unfair to somebody.

[@a.i.a3949]

@@alexblake5369You hit nail on the head with that

[@eugene937]

At the elite level it is no longer about thinking which moves wins pieces and which moves loses, it is genuinely like 10-20 steps ahead and its just so complex to show and prove to a layman why and how they suspect someone is cheating that its almost impossible to prove without hard evidence which is why its such a big deal.

[@carlangelo653]

Trust is also a huge factor. We have one well respected player accusing another player before who has admitted to cheating in the past. What makes everything look worse for the guy is at the interviews after the ordeal the way he answered the questions were a bit off to say the least.

[@eugene937]

@@carlangelo653 exactly, he blunders moves in the post game interview as well like how.

[@bluemystic7501]

And other GMs have suspected Hans of cheating too.

[@sarahmcdonough7713]

When people talk about elite chess players thinking moves ahead, does that mean they’re imagining all possible next moves, and what they’d do to answer them? And so on with the next set of moves? If that’s the case, they’re thinking simultaneously about many, many possible games and monitoring all of them? Or is it something else?

[@jolondacross9726]

@@sarahmcdonough7713 this is exactly that

[@DimaWSM]

I knew you weren't going to use the device *there* but the way you prepared everything with such a dry approach almost made me reconsider if you reeeaaally weren't going for it. Great job!

[@rio-kt7ut]

definitely shouldn't be going there with a dry approach 😆

[@DimaWSM]

@@rio-kt7ut that one got me really good🤣

[@necefovismayil]

Took ANALysis to a whole another level

[@CheeseMan68_1]

“Now we need someone to test it out.”

[@charlied8355]

To me, the biggest thing is around 14:50 when your opponent "senses" something is off. I think that's why a lot of people are siding with Magnus, as he has played countless games over the board and has always took losing and losing winning positions to make a draw with grace and with a sense of humour (though obviously he wants to win/is competitive) he instinctively knew something was 'off' about Hans' play whereas he's never said that about anybody else. Also, to go as far as withdraw from the tournament, it's obvious he had the same feeling as your opponent and knew something was up. Magnus is the best chess player in the world and i think most people trust his judgement, especially as he has a pretty spotless record of fairplay and respect.

[@techheck3358]

mike's opponent sensed something based on mike's past game & rating. in the tournament, hans was a last-minute replacement, he wouldnt have had enough time to prepare and/or practice

[@elementalgolem5498]

@@techheck3358 yet Hikaru, Magnus and many other gms figure out people are cheating online without even knowing who they are

[@techheck3358]

@@elementalgolem5498 online, you can still see the persons profile. and again, he was a last minute replacement, and hans has continued to be a great player even through the increased security measures added because of this

[@elementalgolem5498]

@@techheck3358 its not like Magnus didnt know of him. He has played him before that was the first game they had against each other. Normann isnt some new kid on the block hes a well known chess player that has multiple suspicious things about his career and rating

[@plzletmebefrank]

@@techheck3358 if a person is cheating online then their ranking reflects that and wouldn't seem suspicious. What is suspicious is playing like a computer and not a human. To be fair, the best chess players blur that line, but usually there is still some hints there.

[@Math.Bandit]

The interesting thing (that turns this from wild Internet theory to tiny but non-zero chance) is that at the SuperGM level you don't even need to transmit full moves or even any moves. Just a simple "Vibrate when there is one move significantly better than the 2nd-best move" is almost certainly enough for any SuperGM to beat Magnus more often than not. It's the same reason chess puzzles are much easier to solve than finding similar tactics in a game, since in a puzzle you're told there is a solution.

[@psychd5374]

You would still need the device to know what position the board is in.

[@thediamondpro5050]

@@psychd5374 well a spectator of the game can play the moves on their computer and transmit them back to the device like shown in the video

[@rouxbnr]

@@thediamondpro5050 Thats why chess streams for higher level tournaments have delays, so that a spectator cant transmit the moves in time.

[@christiantretter4605]

@@rouxbnr that didn't start to become common until after the cheating allegations began. I'm pretty sure the original game in question did not have delays.

[@rouxbnr]

@@christiantretter4605 ye it didn't, they only had a 15 minute delay after the third round.

[@alice20001]

OMFG I feel so bad for Michael Grooves (the chess player). He's trying to wrap his brain around: How do you go from that first game, to THIS, more than even focusing on the game. Most of all, he is being a heck of a good player, complimenting and being very well mannered. What a champ!

[@AstralArbourSys]

The best part is he didn't even need to do all this. Bluetooth/wifi connected, er, devices, already exist. My partner bought one of those on impulse because they thought I'd be interested in using it on them... it was a mortifying conversation but funny looking back on it.

[@emilyscloset2648]

As hikaru said, actually all you would need is a single beep in high tension positions to alert the player there is a winning idea. They are so good at calculating, they will find the actual moves themselves

[@manixxzz1483]

Exactly this. All it takes at that level is just a small pulse on which move to focus on, and it's already a big advantage.

[@user-sy2jy1si8f]

The problem with this approach is - to get to the position where this winning idea exists, you must outplay your opponent first. You just cannot do average moves against a superior opponent and then somehow find yourself in a winning position

[@olympicswimmingpoolpiss]

@@user-sy2jy1si8f so you're saying these super GMs need to know how to play the game.

[@user-sy2jy1si8f]

@@olympicswimmingpoolpiss yep, you won't beat them just with a couple of buzzes, no matter how well-timed these buzzes are. IMO, Hikaru greatly overestimates effectiveness of this cheating technique. The improvement it can bring to a player is too small, it can't lift 2400-2500 player into 2700 territory.

[@luongmaihunggia]

But how would it actually read the position? You need a recording device.

[@michael_grogan]

You don't need the device to send you coordinates in morse code, you just need it to buzz once every time your opponent makes a mistake

[@domw3239]

If you’re already a good chess player, yes. But with this beauty you can stick it up anyones arse and they’ll be a chess god.

[@peterruf1462]

Well that obviously proves that he did cheat

[@Baekstrom]

If I was to cheat at chess, my first idea would be something simpler and less invasive, like... a laser pointer blinking the message on a wall or object behind my opponent.

[@cly_]

The point is nobody else is able to see it, and in a real tournament you won't be able to get your partner in to point that laser, it would be too obvious anyway.

[@duroxkilo]

@@cly_ not necessarily.. in a large room full of people and all kinds of distractions there are many possibilities. one could make a light bulb flicker ever so slightly and nobody would notice let alone be capable of 'decoding' the messages. think of the small LED in a smoke detector. would you pay attention to that while attending/playing a chess tournament? besides, at their level they don't really need to be given *all* the moves. even just a hint in a single position can influence an entire game. the idea w/ the plug toy was so ridiculous :)

[@rtotheizzle]

bro that's the worst idea I've ever heard.

[@smush4635]

The guy that used this really said “Desperate times call for desperate measures...”

[@bidaubadeadieu]

I mean, the move at 14:36 is a big tell! It's such a quiet move. It doesn't attack anything, or defend anything that wasn't already defended. It doesn't really set up any tactical ideas, like he didn't need the g1 square free to put another piece there. Improving the the position of your king like that is just not something beginners do, it's really hard to spot when it's the right idea.

[@ashscott6068]

Nothing screams ENGINE like a random king move

[@Obi-Wan_Pierogi]

Michael was such a good sport! It seems he was quite annoyed - I don't think he knew what your intentions were. He knew you were cheating, but he didn't know what your endgame was. I'm so glad he seemed chuffed at the end there.

[@jackingwads7513]

The real question is did you FEEL that

[@umbrellasquid9669]

I love the how this is used for this

[@XIIchiron78]

I loved that visible moment of hesitation when you slapped it down on the table before he picked it up at the end lmao

[@user-vi4xy1jw7e]

There was no hesitation. Lol

[@scruffex3736]

For me it was really interesting to see how Mike was hiding his hands basically the entire time while he was cheating. Just body language telling you so much more than youre aware of. Nice reminder

[@brent4674]

yeah especially intresting since the signal went to his ankle so it was just pure unconsious body language

[@starlii9690]

My friend was talking about this chess situation and I thought he was being stupid as always and was trying to annoy me and then i came across this video... I'm in tears 😭

[@ZER0--]

As other folk have suggested, maybe use a Faraday cage? Or play behind closed doors, and have it on delay. Or make 'em bend over and use a highly sensitive metal detector.

[@ifer1280]

If you can distinguish between long and short pulses, you could convert the 1-8 pulses per coordinate to 3.

[@dukeofanchor]

This could be used by the defense attorneys of Magnus and Hikaru in the Hans niemman lawsuit lmao

[@sploob865]

Don't you just hate it when the defendant pulls out the vibrating anal beads?

[@guywiesel2380]

I think it's circumstantial

[@lumpy6917]

they also need a physical proof of evidence that Neiman has owned or owns that kind of machine, meaning he will be innocent until proven

[@lareginadiquori5888]

Proving that something is physically possible it's not a proof that someone did it. But it still a great source of memes

[@Samsunaattori]

@@lumpy6917 Does this potentially mean that the police could get a search warrant to confiscate sex toys from Niemann?

[@antiLGTBQ]

To add: Hans said he had "practiced the moves as in Magnus's preveous games" but magnus had only 1 game similar. for perspective thats 1 set of moves, in 1 game, out of tens of thousands

[@rudellius]

He had studied a transposition that resulted in a position that occurred in a game Magnus had played before, not the exact same set of moves themselves.

[@tirkentube]

@Maxtor what if THIS was how he did it? Mangus and this guy both had played AI enough to know what playing it feels like, so they both knew someone is cheating. what if a player had played AI enough to learn the moves AI would make in a given scenario, and then memorized those moves? So now, he's going into the tournament armed with the knowledge of an AI that has trained in millions of chess games and came out the other side as a brilliant chess AI. Would that be considered cheating? Could you even undo that or protect against it? So maybe this isn't about cheating with AI, but it's about humans vs AI and how to adapt to it, and perhaps humans finally HAVE mastered chess, in a way. i mean once you know all the BEST MOVES, what else is there to do with the game?

[@tirkentube]

it's just like the opening moves. almost always, an AI and most human players alike will always move their center pawns out first. what if someone could remember all the other moves necessary to beat almost any scenario?

[@sakarilaakkonen5466]

@@tirkentube you sir have certainly never played chess outside of a very basic level

[@CaTastrophy427]

@@sakarilaakkonen5466 I feel like he's the kind of guy who would always fall for the Scholar's Mate and eventually learned to avoid it via the Bongcloud Attack, thinking that's the "BEST MOVE" for the situation.

[@cellokid5104]

The reveal made me laugh out loud

[@Lemon_Inspector]

It's fairly common for "alien abduction victims" to claim they have a receiver implanted in their skulls or teeth, but this is the first time I've heard of someone receiving radio signals with his prostate.