Adult with Autism | Three Questions | S01E01

[@anabelle1508]

Hey Paul, thanks for this video. I too don’t have fidget toys, I was diagnosed at 46 and fidget toys are fun but I am not used to that. I like what you said about your hands being anxious and that allows the rest of you to stay calm, I realise it’s the same for me, if you look at me on the metro you will see no sign of anxiety but in my pocket I am gently torturing the skin around my nails (not great, I admit) I see « regular » people doing it openly but I won’t, I’ll wait till I’m at home, I take pride in not appearing nervous, I’ve got decades of training, I am a master at it 😂 I too want to blend in and in a way, I am very protective of my interiority, that’s sacred, that’s untouchable, I’m not going to show it to the world. Also, I agree with you that with autism you value much less all the success and money and fame. I used to say that I wanted to be a singer but I would hate to be famous. And I always tell my kids that too much money brings you too much problems. Famous or rich people don’t impress me, « who are you really ? » is what impresses me. What I love the most about being autistic is to be able to feel emotions so deeply, the intensity I feel when listening to music or simple joys of life, and how empathic I am, I know a lot of people don’t have access to that and it’s sad for them. The down side is that I DO experience every little thing very intensely so it can be overwhelming but I would trade that for nothing in the world.

[@AdultwithAutism]

Thanks for that, and I agree with you. I torture my pens! 😂

[@bryanmerton5153]

Wow nice video Paul! I have tons of fidget toys! Always have my fidget spinner in my pocket. I don’t leave home without it! I also solve my Rubik’s cube 10 -20 times a day! Even at work! Over the years I have used Gameboys, phones, hand flapping and the like. It is the best way for me to self regulate! I didn’t know about the sunflower Lanyard but that does sounds cool! I have never been into what everyone else is going on about. I certainly don’t have status of any kind and do not care about other peoples status. I have not had a dog since I was a kid and I have been walking my neighbors dog every morning for a about a month now. I find it absolutely fascinating watching the dog sniff around and find the perfect spot to pee! I would like to talk about that rather then how much I make or how much someone else makes🤪. Loving the questions videos! Wow three video in a day! Way to go!

[@AdultwithAutism]

Three videos across a weekend, not three a day! That would be very intense for me to knock up 😂 Dogs are much more fascinating than people...unfortunately George is a cat in a dogs body, and every dog he sees is like the first dog, and he goes insane trying to get to it as he thinks they're all his friends and want to play. It's sweet but he's getting strong so it rips your arm out the socket 😂 I should get myself a Rubiks cube...

[@sophya5796]

Rubiks cubes really are the original fidget toys 😄 Like, strangely all my friends who had one (in the nineties) later turned out to be on the Spectrum 😂

[@kdcraft89]

I always learn things from your videos. I wouldn't have said I hate queues (lines in the U.S.) before watching this. But when I shop I keep an eye on the checkouts and if they are too long I'll just continue to shop till they shorten. And I go at odd hours to avoid crowds, etc. If it looks too busy, I might not go in. I've done this for as long as I can remember, but never related it to not liking lines or crowds until now. Protecting myself from overstimulation. Same with traffic routes, etc. I wondered if you stroke your beard to stim. I run my fingers thru my hair a lot, I just realized and similar. Used to chew up pencils and even pens when younger. etc. Toys seem a bit foreign..

[@AdultwithAutism]

I do. The beard touching is a stim I never knew until people noticed it on the channel and told me I did it.

[@SweetiePieTweety]

My new fav line…. “Where were the pajamas in that story?” I’ve landed

[@AdultwithAutism]

I might just ask that in everyday conversations from now on 😂

[@craigfowler7098]

That mucky minded people comment made me chuckle. Plus love your honesty and plain sinple examples of what life is like. I relate a lot.

[@gnomenorthofthewall1982]

Interesting stuff and questions. Don't want to be pessimistic, but I fear the Sunflower Lanyard will be ruined in 5 years if knowledge of it spreads. Then the more unpleasant NT individuals will start using it to cut queues and it won't work anymore for those who would actually need it.

[@AdultwithAutism]

True. The guy in the video was saying how people were using them to not wear masks in shops, so the meaning of the lanyard got changed.

[@marikac6263]

The 🌻 lanyard is for all hidden disabilities 😊 so not just autism, but it actually says on the card attached to the lanyard what is the disability or need. That's why I have issue with it as people with e.g. hearing impairment and autism get the same lanyard, even though the needs are very different, but nobody can tell the difference unless reading the card, which is often wrong way round or you need to invade the personal space to read what's on the card. I always find it funny when you say to drop you an email 😂 I don't do email's unless it's business and necessary but even then it takes me ages to press the send button 😊 I am probably the only one struggling with this but there are some weird people like myself. Surprisingly, I don't have that issue on IG, messenger or comments, I do check the grammar, however it doesn't stress me nearly as much.

[@AdultwithAutism]

Thanks Marika, I only know about 5 minutes worth of info on the lanyard so I am sure there is more to it. But I agree with you, the impairment or need can drastically vary! If Instagram or comments made it easier to ask, then no worries. I only mention emails as I check them, IG is only when I have an urge to look at puppies! 😁

[@Marie-1901]

“Where was the pajamas in that story” 😂😂😂 Hubby and I have been wondering/worrying about how Tuesday went for you so I’m super glad to see you smiling. Thanks for another good video!

[@AdultwithAutism]

Thanks Marie, I didn't want to do another 'down in the dumps' video just yet, but I am not doing bad thank you.

[@josephsells4187]

Hey Paul, I do have and use fidget toys myself. I didn't have any until this last year. But when i was a kid at different times we lived on farms. I would collect used switches (like toggle switches and knob switches) that were laying around after repairs were made to tractors or work trucks. I would carry those around and flip or turn the switches over and over again. And i would also spin the wheels on my toy cars as fast as i could over and over again. I didn't have any of the Mask toys but i did have a bunch of the G.I. Joe toys that were made in the 80's and a few of the He-Man toys as well! And i'm not ashamed to admit when my kids were younger and still played with their toys... I did too. 😂 Thanks Paul! Still smiling!

[@AdultwithAutism]

Hey Joseph, Got me thinking now about what I would have played with as a kid that could be classed as something similar... Probably a big bucket of Lego I had. I'd make the same things over and over again...then something was never quite right so I'd dismantle the lot and do it again. Now I do similar on games on the PC. I create something and then restart to see if it can be more efficient! Some habits never leave.

[@kristalsiders3843]

This is a great idea for a series! Concerning your answer to the third question...that is what I like about autism too!

[@kristalsiders3843]

@Mindful Divergence Hi right back at you friend! 😊😁

[@jasonclarke7422]

I have a sunflower lanyard but I feel embarrassed to wear it as I feel that I would be advertising to the world that I have Autism, I know that it’s a stupid reason and it would of been a great help recently when my wife and I went on a cruise as it is so different now since covid, having to queue up, having a lateral flow test, having to book a PCR test for your return, filling in the passenger locator form, all while being in the crowded departure lounge, no joke when we eventually got on the ship I was totally burned out and slept for two days.so sod the embarrassment I will be wearing my sunflower lanyard next time 👍

[@AdultwithAutism]

I'm with you. I'll crack it out for special occasions, but manage without for everyday living and stick to my personal adjustments.

[@ezzi4411]

I know a little about the sunflower lanyard and I like the idea behind it but I find it so annoyingly ugly! I just hate how it looks! Still a useful tool in a neurotypical world though.

[@AdultwithAutism]

True, it is a bit hideous! But then I dislike sunflowers! 🌻

[@sophya5796]

Agree...it looks like it was designed for kindergarden! You know, "We have two groups here, the Daffodils and the Sunflowers" 😂

[@AdultwithAutism]

They bring the wrong kind of impression for me

[@flamingohead27]

Now i have to look up an sunflower lanyard. Interesting. I rub fabric together. And I wipe away webs in my hands. There are not actually webs its a thing I do. Done it since my earliest memory like 2 or something. 12:25 i like having autism because the way i see and think is different. Like youve said things normys worry about i don't. I don't care about the best stuff or whi with who. I love me. I hate that this world doesn't have a pace for me. I love thinking outside of the box. I was mocked and laughed at like a silly show or movie or something because i told these people i enjoy working on cars and they laughed at me like i was the bottom of the barrel crap. Like how could they be waisted there time talking to me. 17:54 going home and being comfortable and watching stuff is my idea of a holiday.

[@AdultwithAutism]

👍🏼

[@smallfruit9135]

New subscriber hello 👋🏾🤩

[@AdultwithAutism]

Hello and welcome 😁

[@Superstarr06]

16:57 what if something were to happen and you may need it in the future?

[@AdultwithAutism]

I could be saving for a day that might never come. I have insurance should I lose my job or need 6 months off for any reason. Outside of that, I focus on today 👍🏻

[@Superstarr06]

@@AdultwithAutism oh ok 👍 Also if you’d be interested, you should do a video relating to money, finances,savings and whatnot. :)

[@AdultwithAutism]

If there is a way for me to do that type of video, I will do. I do very limited things with finance so there wouldn't be much to talk about, but I'll try and have a think about it 👍🏻

[@Superstarr06]

@@AdultwithAutism :)