After 11 Years of Marriage Wife Cheated on Me With 8 Months Affair, So I Played Along to Teach Her..

After 11 Years of Marriage Wife Cheated on Me With 8 Months Affair, So I Played Along to Teach Her a Lesson.
Timestamp-
0:00 - Story 1
15:11 - Story 2
#redditrelationship #redditupdate

[@toadman5184]

Should have just done a divorce after confronting her. NO relationship survives an 8 month affair.

[@juliearmfield2634]

He's on a Fool's errand

[@chinaking918]

Right. That’s almost a year worth of cheating. Of believing someone who was lying and deceiving you. I wouldn’t be able to look past that. I would be wondering what’s the truth what’s the lie. Constantly wondering if my partner is going where they say, doing what they say they were. Checking phones and online profiles. It’s too much on the brain. I’ve seen ppl mentally break down because they took a cheater back but couldn’t get over what was done. Once trust is broken there’s really no way to come back from it.

[@rythinpain]

A few 8 month affairs turn into relationships to be fair! Just not with the original pairing lol

[@l-l-l-l-l-l-l]

Doormat behavior

[@mohamohai3932]

True but it takes a real man to do it Not saying I'm a one myself

[@legiontepes3474]

Story 1:there's no fixing a marriage after 8 months of cheating ended solely because caught. It was no mistake, it was all intentionally cruel. If op has even a single shred of self esteem and respect he can only divorce. Everything else is just self harm.

[@Telltales.]

Haven't been seeing your name in comments lately. Glad you are still here :D. (Sorry if u still commented daily and i couldnt notice!)

[@mannydcbianco]

Unfortunately this is the truth. I'm sure there are extremely rare exceptions, there almost always are, but they're so rare that they're irrelevant as a tool for guidance for others in the same situation. I would bet that almost every couple that "succeeds" in getting back together and work it out after long-lasting infidelity are just fooling themselves. They're just going through the motions and pretending, desperately trying to recreate what has been irreparably destroyed.

[@ShiNijuuAKL]

Also she didn't want to talk to AP's wife initially

[@vavadadeur150]

​@@Telltales. J'aime le caca

[@Sinatragaze]

Agreed, also the way he treated her after, giving her no privacy at all should’ve been a red lit indicator, and he was just embarrassing the both of them at that point

[@takidsage1515]

Story 1: I don’t think people understand that having a full blown affair during a marriage is not a _mistake_ . It’s a deliberate decision. Slipping up and sleeping with someone in a moment of weakness _may_ be a mistake, but to continue that is not. To illustrate what I mean, have you ever contemplated what is invoved in keeping an affair? You constantly have to lie over and over to your partner. Most times, the cheater will withdraw emotionally, sexually, and physically from their partner. They start to take their frustrations out on their partner, all the while whitholding any real support for that partner. When the innocent mate begins to put two and two together and to become suspicious, often times the cheater will gaslight the fuck out of the innocent partner, spinning and twist details and facts to make the innocent partner feel like they are guilty, that their insecure, that what’s clearly happening isn’t going on and that they are overreacting. The same person you say that you love and occasionally come home and kiss after they sucked of some guy, or some girl the was just intimate with if the cheater is a guy, that same mouth you use to lie and tell your partner you love them, and you kiss them with those same unclean lips. And oftentimes if the cheater is a woman, and they get pregnant, they’ll try to gaslight the man into thinking it’s his kid when in reality he is raising another man’s child. Everything that man thinks that is real is all a lie. That man sometimes will go years not knowing that his whole life has been a lie, and when the truth comes out, he can’t get any of those years, time, effort or money invested back. He’s been robbed of something so deeply painful and he can never ever get it back. To the people who defend or who have an affair, this is the type of double two faced snake in the grass that you have to be to live such a lie. It’s sick. It’s psychotic. To consistently be so disingenuous to someone you claimed to love. To willingly inflict such deep pain and have absolutely no empathy for the person you claimed to care for. It’s sick and it sickens me to my very fucking core. Anyone who does this shit to their partner is rotten to the fucking core and it’s absolute fucking scum.

[@deusdamnit]

People who use the word "mistake" do so colloquially to refer to "an action that they wouldn't have made if in their right mind" - you can repeat bad decisions, even deliberately. Here's an example: Addiction. There's two pieces to addiction, the psychological impulse to perform the action, and the reward granted by the action. A gambling addiction is exclusively psychological; there's nothing neurological about it, such as with a substance addiction. However, a gambling addict can continue to repeat a negative pattern of deliberate behavior and still be making a mistake. A cheater who is stuck in their affair fog isn't addicted to sex, hurting their partner, or the thrill of the affair. In most cases, they like the validation. Affairs are a constant honeymoon period - everything about the affair is the affirmative, validating experience that you get in the beginning of a relationship. You can rationally hate what this experience does, but still explain keeping yourself complacent about the decision to continue doing it. You know what's really sad about affairs? The reason that a partner will gaslight, lie, and lash out during an affair is because they feel guilt. They have to project this guilt onto others, as humans are wont to do - it's actually very rare to find someone that is capable of taking full accountability of their own actions. Everyone deflects a little bit, and everyone projects. When you're panicking, you're emotionally dysregulated - odds are, you're just reacting to whatever stimulus is put in front of you. None of it is okay. None of it is acceptable. But, it's a lot more complex than just "this person is evil and plotting to ruin your life." There are reasons that underlie every decision, and it's possible to live months or years in a bad headspace that affects your ability to make decisions. Addiction is just one example of how a mind can be so compromised that it's impossible to make good decisions. Another is abuse. Look at DV victims or SA victims, look at the patterns of behavior that they develop. They internalize a lot of things into themselves, a lot of the bad things that happen they see as their fault. The fucked up thing is that you can see this level of mental revision very early in abusive households. I'm talking about before there's any violence, before there's any yelling, you can see this sort of mental retelling of a person's decisions and fault with very little actual stress involved. Do you know what that means? That even the most principled person can fall prey to their own neuroplasticity. Spend a little time looking at how people with mental illness demonstrate the same patterns of behavior over and over and over and you might realize that this same logic applies to all of humanity. Individuals are complex, patterns aren't; but, the closer you inspect each pattern, the more you learn about the person - and you'll find that there really isn't a blanket opinion you can hold about anything, even cheating.

[@takidsage1515]

@@deusdamnit i don’t agree with this, because while it’s possible for someone to have a legitimate issue, there is a level of guilt that they would feel knowing that what they are doing is wrong. I don’t agree that most of the people who have affairs are these types of people. Most are only concerned about their own desires and feelings, and do not care about the effects that their actions will have on their partner until the damage is done. It’s a form of selfishness. There’s no excuse for said behavior. And even _if_ there behavior is the result of some trauma, and they legitimately do have an addiction as a trauma response to said trauma, they should not continue said behavior. If they genuinely do care about their partner, they will seek help. It’s been done by many people who do legitimately have these types of issues. If they continue said behavior with regard for their partner and make no attempts to change, then there is no excuse, abuse or not. Having an affair is not excusable. That would be tantamount to using their abuse as a crutch to continue enabling problematic behavior. It’s the same as an alcoholic using his past trauma as an excuse to continue abusing alcohol. And the lies that you have to tell to keep up that affair is proof of that.

[@mannyparrilla1807]

This knocked some sense into me again, I do have the take of "Cheating is unforgivable". But I hated story 1 since she obviously felt atleast regret if not remorse, since she did work and endure 9 month of OP, and then OP was trying to give it a chance... fatal mistake was not ending it then and there

[@MrToubrouk]

This.

[@mannydcbianco]

​@@takidsage1515 100% agree with you. Trauma, addiction, whatever - none of it is a valid excuse, and it certainly doesn't justify downgrading deliberately toxic behavior to people you claim to love to a mere "mistake". Calling something that abhorrent a mere mistake is incredibly disrespectful to victims everywhere. Imagine someone r-ping another person and then referring to it as a mere "disagreement" when caught. It's despicable. Even though there are obvious differences in cheating and literal s-xual assault the downgrading of the verbiage to describe the act is the same. The only reason someone would call cheating a mistake, or calling r-pe a disagreement, is to minimize responsibility and accountability.

[@user-ve4hy3dg5j]

All that “reconciliation” sounds exhausting. It sounds like being a jailor instead of a husband. Just dump the trash.

[@Lichor2369]

Sounds like another job on top of reconciling, marriage, raising kids, and a normal job.... fuck that.

[@tgoodfella]

Shes a 304 no matter how much she puts on this act

[@Thanatossssx]

EIGHT MONTHS. no excuses

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

Cheating at all no excuses in my opinion

[@user-mp8qg5tb5e]

It’s gonna be his fault if she cheats again. It’s like cutting yourself and being upset when you see blood. It’s so annoying watching op sympathise with her after she cheated for 8 months. That isn’t a mistake it’s a choice. She is gonna cheat and it’s gonna be his fault

[@bubbykins4864]

Regardless of whether the intent was malicious or not, his naïveté will make subsequent times on him indeed.

[@VerniasAugoeides]

someone of you think that any ending in these cheat stories other than divorce is jus pure cuck shit and unfortunately life is more complicated. All cheaters aren't all exactly the same kind of person

[@liarwithagun]

​@@bubbykins4864Fool me once...

[@MrToubrouk]

Story 2: TL;DR: Trash felt controlled, leaves OOP. OOP is back living his best life.

[@nercksrule]

Story 2: Trash met an ACTUAL controlling man, got manipulated into divorcing a good man. Ain't no man that quotes the Bible to flirt has good intentions in his heart.

[@MrToubrouk]

@nercksrule Found the White Knight.

[@watersnortmoment3734]

@MrToubrouk Are you baiting, or just illiterate? He’s actually agreeing with you, just not your word choice.

[@bobbynelson5849]

@@nercksrule especially a married woman. The Bible is so against adultery it’s not even a good book to quote while being in a relationship with a married woman.

[@raketensven3127]

So therapy's conclusion was; he was too good of a husband and she can't be blamed bc AP had the magical eye contact... Quick, someone sell this !d!ot a monorail..

[@90FormulaE8]

Staying together "for the kids" is never a good idea as spoken by someone whose parents tried that trash...

[@SayanOfRagnarok]

Story 2: its probably a fake story but based on how fast things moved with OP's ex wife and AP it seems more likely they had been talking long before those work trips and she was the one who helped him get that job so they had more excuses to be alone together. She got a lease the minute she asked for divorce that means she had been planning this for much longer

[@redguy2312]

Story 1: OP said it himself, he is weak. Another doormat bites the dust...

[@user-mp8qg5tb5e]

Yeah

[@isrln]

Probably waited a week and started hooking up with someone else. Cuck won't leave anyway

[@VerniasAugoeides]

giving someone a second chance does not equal being a spineless, cuck doormat.

[@thousandyardgavri2785]

See how op is suffering because he held onto the trash

[@georged7059]

Story 1 OP should’ve just filed the papers after making her tell the affair partners wife.

[@andynorck2389]

Story 1: even if she is honest and would never ever cheat again (which I highly doubt) there is no coming back from that. It’s better for both of them to divorce, they only make each other miserable. Time won’t fix it. Only moving on can.

[@gokugtmain2388]

So a couple points: 1. As most people would agree, never take back a cheater. Someone with the capacity to do that and how badly it scars you is something no relationship can come back from. Especially one that went on for the better part of a year. 2. Ngl, OP sounds unhinged and sociopathic the way he went about handling this situation. I understand how traumatic the situation is and him struggling to make an attempt to forgive this woman for her wrong-doing. But you’re just committing to spending the rest of your marriage with vitriol in your heart for this woman. Just cut it off.

[@takidsage1515]

Nah i disagree. Although i agree with the fact that the healthier decision objectively would be to just end the marriage, I also understand the depth of the pain that he must have been feeling. And when you are betrayed in such a deep and personal way, often times you do have a strong desire to hurt the person who hurt you. You want them to feel what they put you through. You want them to suffer the same way they made you suffer. You want justice, and you desire vengeance or revenge. It’s a human response to such a deep level of pain and betrayal. When someone experiences pain to this degree, I understand why he acted the way that he acted. And what got me is while he could have legitimately had a revenge affair, he didn’t. It was all a pretense for her to understand how bad she cut him. And I also took note of how he said he felt while pretending to carry out that affair. He said what he was doing made him sick, and yet, for 8+ months she seemed to lie and gaslight with ease. If anyone is the psychotic one in this relationship, it’s the guilty partner. While OP acted out of pain and a desire to make OP understand the full degree of what she had done, OP originally acted with full disregard and no empathy for him. And while he expressed guilt for merely pretending to cheat, OP had an affair guilt free for months. That sounds more psychotic to me.

[@HighKnighter]

@@takidsage1515After a certain point, you become what you hate, a manipulator, a gas lighter, an abuser, and a liar. At this Point, OP is all the thing he claim to have hated. He does not deserve sympathy anymore, and honestly retroactively justify the abuse he had received upon him. Walking away to rebuild is the only option a man really has. All these people debasing themselves in these revenge stories just leave me with the impression that trash finds trash and deserve each other in the end. Having been cheated upon myself and having taken the high road, I have zero sympathy for these people.

[@takidsage1515]

@@HighKnighter That man didn’t actually cheat. He wanted his partner to know exactly how what she did made him feel. It was all an act. And he even said that just pretending to cheat made him feel sick, and seeing how it made him feel just by merely pretending to cheat helped him come further to terms with just how nefarious his wife’s actions were. Do I think that was the healthiest thing for him to do? No, not really. But I’m not going to condemn him for his actions, and I understand where he was coming from because he was the offended party. And the wounds of an affair cut very deep, I probably don’t need to explain because you said yourself that you’ve experienced it before. Different people react to that pain differently. But the desire to make someone who hurt you feel the pain that you felt is real and it’s human. Although the technically correct and healthy thing to do is simply move on, some people are just unable to do that. For some people, seing the person who hurt them experience “karma” acts as a form of closure for them. You might handle betrayal one way. Another might handle it another. What he did wasn’t healthy, but like I said, i understand his reasons. And i don’t think his reaction means that he “retroactively deserved to be cheated on”. Nobody deserves the deep pain and scars that infidelity causes. And all the more so taking into account that even when he could have he didn’t actually cheat. It was his way of attempting to make sense of the many emotions he was feeling at the time.

[@HighKnighter]

@@takidsage1515 There worse things to do to a person than cheat on them. If that your bottom line, then you haven't seen or can even recognize true depravity. I do not know why you typed out a whole wall of text to justify nasty and cruel behavior. There is no excuse for not being a better human being, when you have all the power to do so.

[@takidsage1515]

@@HighKnighter so how exactly does that validate or justify the pain that he went through? Because he pretended to cheat so that OP could actually understand what she was putting him through that whole time? So she could experience that pain for herself and maybe develop empathy for the pain she was causing? Something he clearly regretted even though he did not actually cheat? Something that OP originally had no remorse for, until she experienced the ramifications of her actions?? Like I said, some people deal with trauma in different ways. This was his way. And the objective of what he was doing was to teach her how deeply her actions hurt. I don’t fault him for that. You can’t put everyone in a box and dictate how they should deal with their world shattering trauma. It’s kinda wild that you are blaming the one who got cheated on when he did nothing at all to deserve that for reacting to that pain instead of condemning the actual perpetrator which was OP. Up until that point, he didn’t do anything to deserve being cheated on. If you are going to deliberately and knowingly hurt someone in such a deep way, honestly to me you deserve whatever comes your way. And to me, the husbands actions were part of the ramifications of her actions. Some people will not learn until they experience legitimate repercussions for their actions. And after she did, that when it hit her and when she started to feel guilty. That’s often how it goes most times. When people are having an affair, that caught up in the thrill of it all. They feel invulnerable, invincible, nothing will happen to them. They can get away with it, and their partner will never know. They rarely ever think about the potential consequences for what might happen as a result of their behavior. And a lot of times they don’t feel guilty when they are engaging in said behavior. They don’t see reality until it hits them dead smack in the face.

[@rogercyuzuzo9819]

Story one , dude is pretty ok with being cheated on but doesn't want to look like that

[@VerniasAugoeides]

lmao he was anything but okay with it. "Wow he didn't divorce and ghost the millisecond he found out. What a cucklord lmaooooo he MUST love the taste of AP in his mouth!!!!"

[@MA-ti5eo]

He literally just wasted 9 more months with this witch. Literally she cheated on you for 8 months there is no fixing that. The cracks in that relationship will constantly be there. Leave. You aren't a hard person when tears of a cheater can get you down.

[@jamegumb7298]

Her life felt too safe and comfortable? Let her go, alone, out on the world, starting up a creer. No more safe and comfortable. Just as she likes it.

[@cerbus6597]

ofcourse shes giving 100 percent nd you not really, she cheated for 8 months, its her fault that youre in this predicament but its also your fault for not cutting her off so now you need to suck it up and try to fix it or just leave.

[@yenisketches6047]

Lol I am such a “no bs” person. Moment my bf showed any type of sus behaviour, I dumped the shet. Imagine person cheats on u and u stay 😪

[@huh5950]

The fact that the reason was "our life was too safe and comfortable" is just a drop in the sea of reasons that are surely bur surely drowning to death any desire I might have to get married...

[@nomusic1179]

Story 1 : doormat decides to stay doormat -- but his wife can't accept him anymore.

[@patriktoth6258]

The guy in the first story is everything,but not a men...

[@gtuesday]

I like how stories (fake or real) like these tend to make people think about these things and i love reading people's perspective too. Whether one thinks these things are right or wrong, at the very least it starts a conversation that may help find a middle ground or solution to these issues. In the end the world isn't only black and white and many things can't be solved just by running away.

[@notlisztening9821]

What bugs me the most is men suddenly starting to eat healthy and working out after they split up. Shows bad character if you only do that stuff when it's time to attract a mate, but not to keep your mate (happy).

[@gtuesday]

@@notlisztening9821 You *do* know that everyone finds their footing in life at their own pace. For some it takes hitting rock bottom to finally give them the drive and motivation to make a change in their life. Also who are you to say that people *don't* work out to keep their boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife. People do that all the time, they just don't post what they do on the internet.

[@notlisztening9821]

@@gtuesday lmao i never claimed there wouldn't be people like that. Of course there are? working out and finding their footing are two different things though and those that act the way i described, are phony... especially if they again stop working out sometime after they found a new partner.

[@gtuesday]

@@notlisztening9821 Working out and eating healthy to find a partner isn't wrong though. Neither is doing so after a break up. If you mean a guy being petty and not doing any work to keep the relationship going, than i totally agree with you.

[@notlisztening9821]

@@gtuesday yeah obviously that's what i said. If you discontinue your healthy lifestyle each time you have "caught" someone, you are a pos - no two ways about it

[@chessieray1465]

For the first story: Even though divorce would affect the children, at least they are communicating what's going on. But bear in mind how the preception of the mother would be affected once they find out. It's better to be divorced and in a more beneficial headspace than to be in a dead marriage for the kids. The kids will have to understand sooner or later. Also, he is forcing her to hold herself accountable, he isn't psychotic. How would it make sense, when he is setting boundaries in the midst of his emotional suffering? Some of those criticisms are ridiculous.

[@philipturner9087]

Story 1 - What a doormat and simp.She plays the good wife a few months and he fell for it. He just give her a green light to cheat again.

[@VerniasAugoeides]

You didn't watch until the end then. Why assume that the wife had cheating on the mind again when literally she was fixated on fixing their relationship and hating herself with literally no indication of cheating again

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

@@VerniasAugoeides FEW ever stop my mentality is once a cheater always a cheater to those they have cheated on

[@RonEngle]

This hits hard I'm 16 and had my first case of infidelity and I have to say it fucking sucks she cheated on me with her best friend and it's a hard pill to swallow legit...

[@no-barknoonan8798]

Never waste your time with a cheater. You'll miss them like you miss a rock in your shoe.

[@His_Noodly_Appendages]

Been cheated on 2 (and probably an unconfirmed 3) times in my roughly 10 committed relationships. Not a good ratio. All of them were when I was under the age of 25. Stay vigilant. Monkey branching is even worse nowadays... EDIT : Cheating was all when I was under 25. 10 relationships total in my life.

[@bunniiluvin]

@@His_Noodly_Appendages 10 commited relationships under the age of 25 ??? No wonder you got cheated on, you jump from person to person

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

@@bunniiluvin can start young and cheating can happen quickly

[@DrEtzor]

This situation really shows great example of if you find someone to cheat with and they're married, your married, that person your cheating with likely is also cheating with others, so there is absolutely no future in it.

[@VitorRedes]

Story1: That's the poor creation from a person that never had a relationship. "I made a list" LOL

[@wolftwingames7387]

Never would I ever take a cheater back. He ends by taking on blame.

[@jameslyons6655]

Story one. He went from victim to volunteer. 8 months of cheating and if he didn’t catch her it would have continued but it’s “a mistake”. This guy is almost terminally insecure. Probably why she picked him to begin with. He was an ornament at their wedding and is useful as an ATM and to watch the kids (maybe dna testing would be a good idea) while she’s out having playtime. Sheesh. At this rate he may as well invite the other guy over and sit in the corner to watch.

[@MrMK211516]

The first story OP is dumb. He's just breaking her and worst himself. Any reconciliation is just her resentful of the whole thing and him watching over his shoulder. The whole taking control of cheaters phone and life isn't healthy. Throw the trash out and move on. Sooner or later they'll resent you and make you out to be the bad guy.

[@philipturner9087]

Story 1 - People looking in and advising you are people who have been through this . . .

[@QueenJuliana89]

Story 2: The guy is really likeable. Gets told not to “worry” about the AP. We’ve all been lied to and been told that at least once by a cheater, my friend.

[@fabriziodavid8373]

First story: they are just destroying themselves trying to fix a broken relationship filled with hatred and regrets

[@showantd4688]

Dude has been seriously lighted , mostly by himself

[@crimsonstorm34]

Now OP's wife knows he's weak willed, she'll never respect him. Guarantee its only a matter of time before she cheats again with knowing he'll take her back.

[@kitsune4058]

An 8 month affair is as far from a mistake as it can get, 243 days she had to come clean at any point and either end things with the AP or with her husband, and she chose to do neither. She only became remorseful because she was caught and the AP didn't really want her, not because she actually did something wrong. 8 months is not a mistake, it is a deliberate decision.

[@Erick-vr8ls]

Trying to hold on to something that's gone just for the kids will always end bad

[@iwanttocomment8966]

"it's a totally different thing to be in the middle of it" Ok... Why does op sound like a sociopath then? Does he not realize he's been hurt too much to reconcile ?

[@konstantinnaumow505]

Always leave the cheater! They arent in love with you. They hating you. Thats why there is another partner. They are just sorry for being caught

[@MaryAX]

"kiCkEd aGainSt" At this point I'm seriously starting to believe incel fantasy revenge bait is a sport in India 😂

[@analyticgeometry9014]

Story 1 tl;dr wife cheats on husband. Wife says she wants to fix marriage. Wife turns herself into victim. Wife completes ruination of her marriage.

[@Tiffany.gachac]

2nd (dont take back cheaters

[@noonespecial9704]

This is why you never punish your partner when they cheat. You give them leverage to manipulate you and make you weak. You also tell everyone as soon as you find out. Go NC, ghost them and only contact them if you have kids.

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

Depends on partner and person if you are 100% done by cheating yea go do whatever you want (not saying it’s right by no means) if you don’t do well with guilt trips and even consider repairs yea no revenge just don’t

[@noonespecial9704]

@@user-es2vf4qn3h I just live by the old adage "The best kind of revenge is living a good life."

[@JLN41211]

I don’t understand why people go through all of this. Why does knowing what happened during the affair matter if you’re divorcing anyway.

[@jamian_eg0istique]

Story 1: at the beginning of this "humiliating requirements for reconciliation" i thought he will make her repay ultimately and then throw her away as she deserved. But now all what i see that this guy is just stepping back justifying this with "you anons outside of this situation don't know how it feel and don't know how to do so don't recommend me cut from the shoulder. I don't know what to do next". I didn't watched to the end of the story yet but i already think that he's gonna try further to "reanimate this 8 months rotten corpse of their relationship" and i don't like where story is going.

[@harshraj-yt6fg]

Never take back a cheater👎👎👎👎👎 (He dumb🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 for real)

[@soubermed2175]

the irony is that the some trauma victim become the very abusers they hate, by subjugating their current partner through that same trauma. That's why u always avoid broken ppl

[@jray2820]

Bro I really hated the first op, like he gets cheated on and is understandably angry, but then mentally tortures her for 9 months and when he's done with his abuse he wonders why she's self harming. I don't have any sympathy for cheaters but he found a way to make himself worse than the cheater and now I just want the worst for the both of them.

[@nanadiaries9189]

Story 1 proves there’s no point in reconciliation after your partner has an affair

[@bd06m0030]

Story 1: Ah Mr. Doormat, many like you out there recently.

[@scoobygang911]

Wrong for staying. She will do it again. She only felt remorse when she got to know the lover had other women.

[@adamxiong1817]

Story 2: Just because they didn’t physically get together before y’all separated doesn’t mean she was emotionally cheating. And she indeed was emotionally cheating.

[@Tony_2834]

Does the op for story 2 ever update again?

[@Montyandrew45]

Wow I thought story 2 was someone I worked with for a minute

[@yuliiastelmashenko8650]

"Stayed together FOR THE KIDS"?? This heckin' people are seriously sick in the head. Wife cheats -> husband is being cruel and deminishing to her for 9 MONTHS -> she selfh@rms and is crushed -> husband is still angry and crushed + "can't communicate with children normally" Yeah, dude, you were totally right to not divorce, uh-huh. I bet kids are LOVING the atmosphere ❤ What could be better than two emotionally drained and shattered parents at home, huh? Nothing like that to grow up happy and healthy!

[@misonbos]

OP in the first story is a horrible simp. People like that makes me furious.

[@bunniiluvin]

First story is so pathetic and sad. All OP did was embarrass himself and lower himself to his pos wife’s level. Best revenge is to leave silently. Being an abusive jailer makes him seem weak and spineless.

[@Lena-Angels]

Never take back a cheater becuz from now on they will never trust each other both of them will be hurt it's better to leave than seeing your parents arguing it will be broken family

[@briangraves5519]

Things went stagnant, eh? Translation: she got bored with OP and had to go find a Chad to give her the warm tinglies.

[@koshertattoo]

Cheating is not a mistake. It's a choice....she deserves the consequences

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

Mind if I take this?

[@DrEtzor]

Tbh, hearing all the things they went through in first story, all the self-harm et cetera, how on earth would you live normal life after that?

[@WhackyRavenLand]

Cheating means you're dead to me. You will never hear from me, see me or have any mercy from me.

[@opentoopen]

First story most helpful story yet.

[@aurorasam05]

i’m glad op made his wife tell aps wife

[@MA-bu3uu]

This guy is letting her use him as a rug. Sure she’s taking the “punishment” but clearly she has a trauma porn addiction: “I deserve to physically harm myself” she clearly needs A LOT of help but the minute he eases up and she gets comfortable she’s going to restart talking to the previous AP or find a whole new one. Whatever trouble comes his way next, is earned.

[@TheKG636]

Guy is being weak af, be rid of her. The example he has set his kids is that cheating is acceptable and they will grow up seeing a toxic relationship.

[@bethmoran6190]

My husband has cheated on me more than once . We are still together married 38 years now. I have not forgiven nor have I forgotten, however, I have learned to live with it. I stopped loving him in 1996 when he raked me while drunk. I have a son who has been sick since he was 15 months old. due to the severity of his illness, I needed to be home to care for him. If I left and divorced him, I would not be able to survive, taking care of him and my other children. Sometimes you just have to bury your pride to survive. He’s been sober now for 18 years after doing a year in lockup for DUI. I am so unhappy I cry nearly every day.. My son still needs me. Last summer he had his third organ transplant. He still not doing great.

[@kevinclark495]

actions have consequences

[@theskeptic3754]

Story 1 : At this point he's just asking to be cheated on 🤦

[@rSoulmate-reddit]

Very well said 👍🏻

[@Sandcastle21]

Hopefully we don’t get another “she cheated again” update. 🙃

[@minutemuse]

Story #1: Jesus fucking Christ, man. The marriage is dead, the trust is gone; he basically admitted he’s just her warden at this point. Just divorce!

[@ScarlettNightNyx]

Story 2: where's the ghosting?

[@srsh12345]

Story 1: The guy is a real dummy. Screwing over his family by forcing this sham marriage and making up this fictional story in his brain where he believes this is the best thing for his children too.

[@funtimegenshin6973]

She will just cheat again but be more sneaky next time

[@thelightedghost]

Ngl.. In story 2 i was expecting some kind of revenge but no.. Sad

[@brianarnold8666]

2nd story; id drag my feet just enough on purpose just so she doesnt have the satisfaction of having the baby while married to her affair partner. Also; unless theres already divorce papers, its absolutely cheating

[@bpmomene2737]

"I couldn't do that to him" (Showing she still cares for him) *Slaps kicks and a few bald spots later* "Oh yeah, he was seeing someone else, while cheating with you. You're just another piece of meat" *Realised she has no worth* Ladies and Gentlemen... KARMA

[@markmessina7895]

He is very weak. Why let it go for 3 months ? Just dumb.

[@kianna2530]

First guy, I get his pain but he got really disgusting.

[@youtubewatcher245]

Story 1: Beta Bucks just cant be saved…

[@mogulmade]

IF YOU HAVE TO DO ALL THAT AND STILL STAY, KEEP THE DAMN STORY. YOUR WIFE CHEATED FOR NOT ONE, TWO, OR EVEN 5 MONTHS... BUT 8. AND REFUSED TO "BETRAY" HER AP TILL YOU THREATENED HER. SIR? GOOD LUCK WITH HER NEXT AFFAIR.

[@C.G.Gaster]

I could overlook an affair that was, one night, had drugs/alcohol involved, and then actually telling me before I find out. Especially the night of. Outside of that, I don't think I could get passed it.

[@watersnortmoment3734]

While that’s admirable, it’s still a very naive view. Not only does this allow them to lie about the scenario, but you’re also ignoring the bigger issue. They made the conscious decision to go to a scenario where there are drugs/alcohol involved knowing there’s a possibility of cheating. A good partner would not allow themselves to get into that situation in the first place.

[@C.G.Gaster]

@@watersnortmoment3734 Eh, those are just the conditions to even consider looking past one. If none of those are met, or they are and nothing improves, the relationship will be ended. Hopefully far easier than marriage would be. Cause marriage to me is just a piece of paper.

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

That tbh would still be the end for me because alcohol does not impair what you want ( to my knowledge ) it impairs decision making only time I would excuse “cheating” is if they were forced like raped or something or something to that extent now the drugs I can understand a BIT

[@VinayakJaiswal-jb4co]

I am not able to get past 4 month relationship 😢its been 6 month....how you guys live through this

[@hotshower695]

Bro jumped through all of those hoops to teach her a lesson god damn

[@frxst3d477]

No self respect

[@pioneerxx]

That’s the first time in these videos that I actually saw remorse in a cheater and hoped that they’d fix their marriage

[@idontknow2591]

bro if i find out my partner is cheating im asking them for an open relationship so they start thinking im talking to other people or not into them anymore to cause em to blow up and admit they cheated

[@watersnortmoment3734]

This only works if you aren’t married. If you’re married that WILL be used against you in the divorce court. It’s also somewhat manipulative and petty. Unironically, if you really want to get back in a less morally ambiguous way, just say you know and break up with her on the spot, while giving no room to continue the conversation. People hate missing closure, cutting it off abruptly after you find out kills any chance of closure whatsoever.

[@Azeraph]

S2 vague details in his own part.

[@mrsandman6188]

Why are there 2 stories?!

[@jessicamarsh9779]

Story 2- Bro she told you she wanted a divorce, you even said you were acting all emotional & stuff, she tried to be nice about it, she made every attempt to spare your feelings, you weren’t happy with her trying to be nice, so you found answers you didn’t like, she NEVER gave you false hope that she would stay, she told you she still planned on leaving but you pushed & pushed, now you want her to be the bad guy bc she wanted a divorce & tried to spare your feelings? I won’t lie, I’d left too. Idk how people deal with that cry baby bs with a grown ass man… and yes I am married, I’ve been with my husband for 19 years (since we were young), married for almost 13 years. If he acted like a cry baby, we’d be done a LONG time ago.

[@lodunost]

"To everyone that spoke to me in absolutes." WOW, yeah well you know story 1 seems like one of low self-esteem and low value people. You either have the convictions to uphold a relationship or you don't. Your wife didn't and for 8 months she lied to everyone around her and put your sexual health at risk. Then being a weak person, you decided to pretend to have someone on the side and subjected her to it. No, not healthy. The dude should have walked away. Perhaps those people have lived it but the dude in story one just assumes no one has this issue because of his language. I can tell you someone disrespects me it's done. I have been married since like a month or two after graduating high school. I have never had an issue. But if my wife did some shit like that. It would be over. She would be considered untrustworthy and not worth my energy or time.

[@gamingcentral2295]

OP in story 2 deserved to be divorced because she is more feminine than his wife

[@kshitiz6926]

This guy is annoying af.

[@CJ-BZ]

story needed a father figure or something to set him straight. such weakness.

[@luhchirp]

Make another video

[@user-es2vf4qn3h]

Look may be different for some but cheating is the worst way for someone to treat their spouse I mean don’t they take vows and uhhh hate to say it but a RARE few ever stop cheating and even if they do they still did it to you

[@jenniekham5838]

The whole its easier for u to tell me to leave since urr not in the middle but bro those ppl have the clarity of kind and are more logical But come on u are weak she betrayed yall you and ur childrens she regrets it cause she is caught and has to face adult consequences She did it cause her life was too calm and safe u as a person w morals couldn't PRETEND to cheat she did it while lying and gaslighting u Its not a mistake she didnt lose controle she could have confessed ot not done it

[@anthomore4269]

First story you are weak, she cheated once and she will do it again and you let her walk all over you. She is death to you but only be communicate and work together for the kids.

[@boogzyoverseer7088]

Op is a mug, save yourself 20mins