ALEX JONES WILL EAT MY ASS | The Kyle Kulinski Show

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"The first time I ever really listened to Kyle Kulinski’s show was in the back of a cab last summer. The driver had his phone hooked up through the stereo and was pumping out an episode through the car speakers - loudly, as if looking to convert a captive audience.
“Do you like Kyle Kulinski?”
The driver, Ahmed, was a recent immigrant and apparently a die-hard fan of Secular Talk, the political talk show that Kulinski broadcasts on KZbin. I told him, yes, in fact. I do like Kulinski, had come across his show several years ago, and, all things considered, he seemed pretty good.
“He understands what we’re up against,” Ahmed said. “Like Bernie.”
But I was surprised to hear Kulinski’s name mentioned in the same breath as Bernie Sanders, particularly with such adoration. Because what I did remember about Kulinski’s show struck me as mostly capital-P “progressive” takes on the news - the left wing of the Netroots crowd more than the democratic socialism Sanders has popularized.
It’s an impression that wasn’t entirely incorrect.
“I have no time for philosophical, airy bullshit,” Kulinski tells me from his home in Westchester, New York. “I don’t want to hear about Lenin. I don’t want to hear about Marx. I just want a super plainspoken, straightforward agenda with a straightforward way of selling it.”
With over 800,000 subscribers and nearly 670 million total views on KZbin, selling a progressive agenda is clearly something Kulinski knows how to do - even Democracy Now, the long-standing flagship of progressive media, cannot match his reach on the platform. Chapo Trap House can certainly boast a wildly devoted fan base (and a not insignificant degree of media influence), but their audience is roughly half the size of Kulinski’s.
While Secular Talk might be more likely to be looped in with the progressive networks around Air America and Pacifica alums like Sam Seder than the more resolutely socialist world, Kulinski’s fiery rhetoric, razor-sharp class instincts, and knack for withering takedowns sets him apart from his peers. Judging by his rhetoric alone, he’s closer to a Eugene Debs than a Chris Hayes.
But unlike Hayes, Amy Goodman, or his friend Cenk Uygur of The Young Turks - who began airing Secular Talk on his web network seven years ago - the thirty-two-year-old Kulinski is virtually invisible in the mainstream media. Despite his enormous fan base, his show has never once been mentioned in the obligatory trend pieces on “the Millennial Left” pumped out by the prestige media. Nor has Kulinski’s name ever popped up at all in the New York Times, Vox, the New Yorker, New York Magazine, or the Washington Post, despite his leading role in cofounding Justice Democrats, the organization widely credited with sweeping Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and the rest of “the Squad” to power.
Just last week, his Wikipedia page was deleted. The reason? “There is very simply no [reliable source] coverage of this person,” according to one moderator. In new media, he’s king - the Sean Hannity of the Berniecrat left. In old media, he’s nobody.
I suspect there are a few reasons for that. There is nothing “cool” about Kulinski’s show. (As a friend put it, “‘Welcome to Secular Talk’ sounds like something you’d hear on Egyptian radio.”) His no-nonsense social-democratic politics won’t get him much cred with the Full Communism crowd. He records his show not in Brooklyn or Los Angeles, but in a studio he built himself in his modest Westchester home. His hair is too groomed and his taste in clothes too preppy to qualify as “Dirtbag Left.” Nor has he ever attended an n+1 release party. “Not only have I not attended one,” he says, “I have no idea what that means.”
And yet he’s astonishingly plugged-in for a young man in the suburbs. Wondering how Sanders ended up on the Joe Rogan Experience? Kulinski, a frequent guest on Rogan’s wildly popular show, introduced them. “You make the most sense to me,” Rogan told Kulinski on a recent episode. “You’re a normal person.”
Much like Sanders himself, Kulinski’s show has a massive audience that just doesn’t compute with our media’s understanding of “what the kids want” or even “what the left-wing kids want.”
It’s probably for the best - the very woke and very WASP-ish decorum haunting much of the media world is nowhere to be found in Secular Talk. “Corporate Democrats over-focus on identity as a trick to divert you from the issues that unite us all - class issues,” he said on a recent episode.
Read More Here!:
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#KyleKulinski #SecularTalk #news #politics #youtube #biden #economics #left #progressive #viral

[@eyuin5716]

Turns out, it wasn’t the frogs that were gay….

[@waltergrace565]

It was just Kyle all along....

[@SpectacularDisaster]

You win the comment section today, Walter looses.

[@spicymemes7458]

It was the fish

[@waltergrace565]

@@SpectacularDisasterTo be fair, this is secular talk, we've all lost today.

[@jarrodkober]

Haha I didn't see your comment before making mine. Similar thoughts lol but I said he’s the one turning the frogs gay.

[@Saccard]

I'm not gay I'm a cannibal is the strangest flex in human history.

[@cezarcatalin1406]

Still a very hot pickup line tbh

[@jacobforrester9827]

Yep, I really hope I never understand his kind of weird. At least not from his point of view.

[@jacobforrester9827]

@@cezarcatalin1406 🤢🤮

[@rigelb9025]

@@jacobforrester9827 I would hope, if I were you, especially not from your own.

[@justatiger6268]

Imagine the dilemmas facing a gay cannibal.

[@whatshouldmyhandlebe123]

This has to be one of the best Secular Talk video titles of all time

[@Zyo117]

Unfortunately just the namedrop is attracting the crazies.

[@Joeljaboy]

ikr i never clicked so fast lol

[@dustinsindledecker154]

Krystal is getting angry at Alex because she is the only one that can eat Kyle's ass.😂

[@shinystarmiestudios4179]

Stories involving Alex Jones tend to produce the best Secular Talk video titles.

[@Videogamelover58]

Lmao

[@snoopy_peanuts_77]

Reminds me of the "I eat pieces of shyt like you for breakfast"

[@toronaldaris]

You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? ... NO.. Classic Sandler.

[@BroodallyHonest]

Holy shit! I just quoted this exact thing on here!

[@dustinsindledecker154]

Alex Jones became Scooter McGavin

[@CraigMcGuinn]

@@dustinsindledecker154Keith Olbermann is the Democratic Party’s Shooter MacGavin. Remember when he responded to someone telling him to cry more tears by saying “that’s piss you fascist. I bet you enjoy drinking them”. That would mean Keith Olbermann believes he cries piss

[@lestercrowley1485]

@@dustinsindledecker154 Shooter* It's a golf movie.

[@EMD766]

Gay leftist: Whatever you say Papa Bear.🫦

[@beepinboopin6454]

Gays aren’t losers like you. Stop watching drag race. YAAAS

[@johnferradino]

Different gay leftist: 🤮

[@ANDREWATX1994]

💀

[@gayasparagus]

He couldn't afford my ass

[@nobo764]

🤣🤣❤️

[@seanwhitehall4652]

Leftists: We can improve society Alex Jones: I'll eat you Centrists: these are equally crazy.

[@wilcee238]

🤣

[@peterstafford4426]

'Leftists'. WE will vote for third party candidates over and over even though all it does is help elect the very worst fascist right wingers!!!!

[@uncomfortabletruth3831]

@@peterstafford4426 I assume you are in support of the false pardigm😢. shaming those of moral principles, who won’t vote for war criminals.. they are so bad, and trump is all their faults. 🤡

[@derekrequiem4359]

@@peterstafford4426To be fair that's not _all_ leftists, but generally I agree with your comment.

[@Victestr0104]

@@peterstafford4426leftists, for the most part, were on board voting for Biden until he unabashedly supported a genocide with our tax dollars. At some point you have to draw a line, and for many leftists that line is genocide. 🤷‍♂️

[@kevinhickey4889]

"I'm not a pervert, I'm a cannibal!!!!"

[@j.fo.v5260]

Even better 😋

[@rileyfuckingrifle]

Yes, because the two are totally mutually exclusive, you know! 😂

[@andrewgreen5574]

​@@rileyfuckingrifleremember that time Alex got caught watching trans prawn? Pepperidge Farm m'embers.

[@rileyfuckingrifle]

@@andrewgreen5574LOL. Sure do. 🤣

[@rileyfuckingrifle]

@theillusiveman6857 he was doing research with his 🍆...? 🤣

[@SpectacularDisaster]

"I was referring to cannibalism" Best defense ever!!!!!

[@amaurylannes]

Your honor, I now yield.

[@LizardOfmonaco-uc7rd]

It didn't work with native Americans

[@sawtooth808]

@@LizardOfmonaco-uc7rd or the people on the Oregon Trail

[@jakotic]

the right in 2024: "no let me correct you! i actually meant something worse than what you interpreted at first!

[@user-oj9hm6ss5i]

Anybody read Kraft-Ebbing ? Ebbing listed cannibalism as a sexual psychosis.

[@warriorwaitress7690]

Just like in Happy Gilmore: "I eat pieces of sh** like you for breakfast." "Hahaha, you eat pieces of sh** for breakfast?!"

[@rileyfuckingrifle]

.... No. 😢

[@adisassy4579]

So true 😂😂😂

[@travisgarrison8777]

His clarification is somehow even worse.

[@verminkillah6622]

Yeah lol, it's not better, even in the slightest. Analingus v Cannibalism... Both equally repulsive IMO, but Cannibalism is obviously wrong.

[@travisgarrison8777]

@verminkillah6622 could be both too, at the same time. Literally eating ass.

[@tylerbailey9329]

The clarification just turns it into a Cannibal Corpse song

[@mememefinally]

Somehow? I would say it's obviously worse to fantasise about cannibalism than eating ass.

[@TerryTurner]

I can see Jesse Lee Peterson reading that and saying," amazin!" 🤣

[@eyuin5716]

He’d be joining in on the action.

[@jean-luceyesofyoureyes5502]

😂😂😂 😊

[@Kehwanna]

Alex is acting like -uh- a Gurly man. Amazin. BETA! Seriously, I can understand JLP ain't all here, but what is up with his audience that is all here? Read the comments, it will puzzle you as much as Candace Owens's fans on YT trying to encourage her that the Earth is flat.

[@dustinsindledecker154]

I don't think Alex would eat dark meat.😃

[@user-mi1eb7iu1p]

😋🤤

[@mackswellgg]

“Literal cannibalism” unironically sounds more sexual in context

[@justsomegirlwithoutamustache]

And more sexual to Armie Hammer

[@ghostofsilence2697]

"I'll eat your ass" 🤨 "No no, not like that, um... I mean I'll tie you up and spit roast you" 🤨 "No stop misinterpreting me, I mean I'll gobble your meat" ~ Alex Jones

[@hugegamer5988]

I’d say eat the rich but he lost all his money in lawsuits.

[@GaryHighFruit]

Alex does sell "Carnivore" supplements.

[@supersaiyanzero386]

You must be a millennial or generation Z you guys use the words unironically and ironically far too often and improperly.

[@thisisme2681]

"Alex Jones came out on Twitter" 😂 was the pun intended there?

[@user-mi1eb7iu1p]

No wonder he hides behind the beard now .....the beard is a front to him still being in the closet after 50 year's on earth 🌎 😆😂 hahahahaha

[@gameofender4463]

When the country seems like a circus, don’t be surprised if the most influential people are clowns.

[@s.williamc.]

Is that a John Wayne Gacy quote?

[@gameofender4463]

@@s.williamc.Not that I know of, as I thought of that one myself.

[@Gwendoline965]

Clown in the video

[@gameofender4463]

@@s.williamc. Not that I know of. I thought of it myself.

[@mandyharewood886]

I'm saying! WTH is wrong with your country. The prime minister of my "shithole" Caribbean country actually said out loud that America has gone mad. Our citizens either don't even want to think about you or spend all their time watching you with mouth wide open. I myself am tired of laughing. I can't believe that we are of the same species. You're done in this world, folks! Nobody cares what you crazy people think anymore. We are well on our way to freedom of the mind.

[@Em3ga]

I'm not gay, but if I was I could do better than Alex Jones. Hard pass.

[@ghostofsilence2697]

I am gay. You're 100% right, there's WAY better options than Alex Jones.

[@Mitchthemysteryman]

You sure? Imagine how wild he would go down there.

[@brendag5263]

Not even women are interested in Alex Jones. His ex wife must have been coerced.

[@ghostofsilence2697]

@@Mitchthemysteryman dude, I don't even want to think about it. Whoever he goes down on will immediately get like 17 different types of gingivitis in their asshole somehow

[@jamesLescobar]

aaaayyyyyyooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[@ilikeducksable]

Even if he meant cannibalism, why would you eat the ass first?? 😂 seems like the least hygienic body part to eat

[@user-mi1eb7iu1p]

😋🤤

[@lachlanbell8390]

Where do you think a rump steak comes from?

[@cigarsid7445]

Yeah. If he was firing on all cylinders he would go with "eat your leftist heart" instead. Clearly he's not.

[@ilikeducksable]

@@lachlanbell8390 True, but we also eat sausage and if I were in a survival situation and had to resort to cannibalism, I wouldn’t try to make sausage using human intestine…

[@Djatawesome]

Don't threaten me with a good time

[@rigelb9025]

This is starting to remind me of those weird Kevin Spacey 'X-mas Specials'.

[@Rebecca-zh5me]

No I don't think he thought people would think he was gay, because he has been talking about eating people if he can't find food for his family for years.

[@dustinsindledecker154]

He did say he would eat my babies

[@Ifoughtpiranhas]

Who does Alex Jones think he is? Shooter McGavin?

[@mit9623]

Imagine only hearing about Kyle Kulinski and Secular talk and then visiting his channel for the first time and the first video title you see is... THIS 😂

[@omarkennedy7056]

Don't threaten me with a good time 😂

[@MBD-BDBF]

Sounds hot. Alex Jones and Kyle Kulinski taking over OnlyFans was not on my 2024 bingo card

[@72marshflower15]

🤣🤣🤣

[@hidafluffminer]

Kyle kulinski has an only fans?

[@nathanielmorey2800]

Ai could make this happen

[@daniwhite3027]

No alex and Crystal= OF. Alex and kyle = cannibalism

[@belstar1128]

Armin Meiwes ?

[@jacobforrester9827]

"I tongue punch fart boxes" -Alex Jones, paraphrased.

[@BronchitisMan]

i hope he takes you out to dinner first ♥

[@ren17x50]

Men that size normally don't like salads

[@rileyfuckingrifle]

🤣

[@sawtooth808]

I’m thinking Alex Jones prefers Corn Syrup 🤭hehhehheh

[@joedirt1965]

His wealth would be gone in a "Road Warrior" apocalypse scenario and he would just be alone and in poor health.

[@dustinsindledecker154]

Alex really needs to stop watching Mad Max

[@semperterra3235]

Alex thinks he'd be Wez with his leftist Golden Youth, when in reality he'd be lucky to be the Toadie.

[@samu_eln1nja]

the climax we were all waiting for 😫

[@eyuin5716]

Nobody was waiting for this. 🤮

[@ElderScrollsEnjoyer]

I expect someone who is 6'2 sideways to eat just about anything

[@SconnerStudios]

It's all the supplements. They contain large amounts of lard.

[@side_B_fanatic]

Savage haha

[@darraasi2998]

@@SconnerStudios And soy. But don't tell that to PJW.

[@bryantblalock4173]

Something about 6’2 sideways is SO funny /):$:&:

[@youreokayboah2128]

😂lmao

[@kweightthree]

This is a great episode for Kyle out of context. @3:40-3:48

[@jex_one]

No conspiracy here, Alex Jones wants to eat dingleberries 😂

[@wintermute_2501]

Shooter McGavin: "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!" Alex Jones: "Hold my salad."

[@MrOneanddone91]

Alex Jones and the frogs must be drinking the same water

[@Insan0flex]

"LIKE CORN 🌽 ON THE COB!!!" #chopchopchop

[@unwashedhands2087]

I mean....if he's offering.....

[@cragorichard]

"so Alex Jones came out on twitter" 😆

[@hugegamer5988]

This is your brain 🥚 This is your brain on Alex Jones supplements 🍳

[@user-oj9hm6ss5i]

Jordan also posted a picture of ShoeOnHead, from her woman lives as man for a day vid, saying she was a trans detransitioner.

[@proudbrogressive315]

Doesn't shoe have a handful of transexual friends? She's also bisexual, if I recall correctly.

[@user-oj9hm6ss5i]

@@proudbrogressive315 that's what I understand too, but Peterson fell for some transvestigater meme.

[@sawtooth808]

@@proudbrogressive315 idk about that, but I do know she has an Onlyfans account

[@sandpiperr]

@@proudbrogressive315 You're defending shoeonehead? Gross.

[@supersaiyanzero386]

​@@proudbrogressive315she waves her finger in the air, finds which way the wind is blowing and decides to think and be whatever THAT is sh0e is the ultimate grifty pick me

[@PacRimElectric]

Alex Jones eats corn the long way

[@cezarcatalin1406]

😳

[@sawtooth808]

And peanuts 🥜 too

[@CJacquot]

These are the segments that keep making me come back to Secular Talk. Top tier Kulinski commentary

[@eyuin5716]

Alex must be desperate for money if he’s willing to do that.

[@Zyo117]

Nah, he didn't link his website or try to peddle his pills.

[@xelasomar4614]

0:00 I didn't know that rimming paid that well.

[@dustinsindledecker154]

He asked Trump if he could eat his ass and Trump said he couldn't afford his ass being eaten.😂

[@belstar1128]

really hungry too

[@rigelb9025]

@@Zyo117 Which leads me to speculate that the deeper need he's trying to quell here isn't the pursuit of wealth, but basic food on his plate, 'cause he's getting hungry.

[@skeletorpfunk6342]

I love that by title alone you know Kyle has 100% creative control

[@MKPolovanec]

Bart Simpson:"Eat my shorts!" Alex Jones:" hold my beer!"

[@RandomU5erName]

🤗 eat the bussy Alex

[@xelasomar4614]

Sure AJ, you meant cannibalism (wink wink nudge nudge) let's go with that.

[@brendag5263]

Reminds me of the line in Happy Gilmore when the guy says "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast." And Gilmore asks... "You eat pieces of shit for breakfast???"

[@livelongandtroll9108]

*I volunteer! I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!*

[@user-tx9so7om5t]

To have Alex jones eat your ass??

[@brucesamia6353]

so cool that he came out...🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@arnoldcox9128]

I can't stop laughing

[@user-my9hr3kh5d]

Two cannibals are eating Alex Jones. One says to the other," Does this taste funny to you?"

[@TedSki82]

This isn't the first time he's mentioned eating people; I'm starting to think the FBI needs to check the freezer in his garage.

[@_JackNapier]

Ya know. . .it's 2024. . . I'd watch that corn🥤😎🍿🃏🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@mrdiego4368]

Him referring to cannibalism instead of sex is actually a little better lol. Hasn’t he already come out in the past, especially after his divorce that he exaggerates his character.

[@sawtooth808]

Not by much

[@muigokublack6487]

Wow, didn't know Alex swung that way. Sorry bud, Kyle's a married man but hey, take me to dinner first...

[@nathanjones5457]

I love that his comeback and counter is even more insane than the original tweet. 😂

[@Cyberdemon11120]

Alex Jones made the sad mistake of ignoring Rule 34 and then doubled down. The man is a master.. of Self Sabatouge.

[@kiwifulla3]

“Like corn on the cob!!”

[@Zyo117]

😂 I think by 'your ass' he just meant 'you', ie the whole person; but man, that definitely didn't go well for him lol

[@RonanGallagherBand]

He's clinically insane, but hey, the ratings are great for insanity in this weird dystopian nightmare we live in.

[@Sophylio]

Alex Jones has become Tobias Funke from Arrested Development.

[@rigelb9025]

His development has become arrested. And his ass sets seized.

[@Leticia-uv1ne]

In the "good old days" he'd be just a crazy man on the street with a crazy poster Even if he meant cannibalism it's still super weird haha

[@nickm724]

I beg your pardon??

[@Josh-ns2vs]

Great thumb, Kyle. LMAO

[@Gfish17]

This feels like a reverse turing test.

[@michaeld4861]

Ah yes, cannibalism is the number 1 issue in the US right now. Everyone knows that.

[@rigelb9025]

Well I mean, after this, and the 'bloodbath' debacle, I think it's safe to say - it is now.

[@jf9912]

#rimgate

[@aar8n955]

OMG! The Thumbnail! What does Krystal think about that, Kyle? 🤣🤣🤣

[@thanh-nguyen1976]

“Rim King Alex Jones”. Yaaaaasss Daddy

[@angelantayhua3096]

I like to imagine Krystal sitting in a chair in a corner with her legs crossed and a glass of wine watching this title happen.

[@dougnockles29]

Alex thought he was talking about meat but really meant "tossed salad"...

[@SconnerStudios]

Any news story involving Alex Jones is guaranteed to be funny (well save for sandy hook). It's a law of physics.

[@SconnerStudios]

Also KYLE HAIR NEEDS TO CHANGE

[@moonlitegamer]

😂😂😂 he eating ahh now!! 😂😂 he really need to make money that desperately

[@beforethereign3925]

I think Femmenimem would be into it.

[@kenneth6102]

Alex Jones is the pinnacle of living 40k memes. Everything he says is space marine. 😂

[@TheTexasLeftist]

If he's gonna eat mine, then he better do it counterclockwise

[@MarkArandjus]

3:40 Kyle out of context hall of fame moment potential.

[@Corvaire]

I offered Alex some Strawberry Jelly with that salad and he said "No, I want to taste what Tim Pool ate last night." ;O)-

[@sawtooth808]

🤢🤮

[@totalrecone]

LOVING the impressions!

[@eriksalholm]

Bro looks very, _very_ romantic.

[@godfunk]

You know it’s not really my thing but what the heck. A mouth is a mouth

[@rigelb9025]

And what is a Bµ++H¤£3 ?

[@MABADBledsoe]

"...with jelly and syrup. I prefer syrup!" -Chris Rock in 'Me, Myself & Irene'

[@buriedstpatrick2294]

You don't pull back like "No, what I meant was that I'm actually a cannibal! You're misinterpreting my epic tough guy persona!" unless you missed the obvious self-own. Had he left it up without saying anything I would almost give him the benefit of the doubt. But as it stands, it's pretty obvious he's clueless.

[@marchmelloow]

It's more that people like yourself are _still_ misunderstanding him on this. He's talking about how, when all food runs out from society, that people will most likely start eating people to survive. He isn't saying that he wants to eat people on the regular or anything.

[@grayorca15]

Whichever definition of “eat” he meant- how ‘bout no?

[@postiepaul]

Even Hannibal Lector chose the liver washed down with a nice Chianti. (Maybe Alex would agree).😊

[@sawtooth808]

I think AJ,is more of a Thunderbird or Nighttrain guy

[@Elementfire0666]

You don’t remember how they clipped some of his segments from his show. I think this was 3 or so years ago to be fair. Apparently he has an audio cut he jokes and references to this on his infowars show. It’s as good as the Alex Jones in the style of an Indy song that got more popular because Joe Rogan played it on his podcast once. m.kzbin.info/www/bejne/pWaofKh_qthgpac&pp=ygUeQWxleCBqb25lcyBpIHdpbGwgZWF0IHlvdXIgYXNz

[@JohnGormleyJG]

Two unskippable ads always ruin my day Kyle.

[@Sgtfroso1]

Alex Jones now Tosses Salad.😂

[@sawtooth808]

With Corn Syrup

[@willfungusman8666]

Is this what Kyle does with Krystal 🔮

[@bladerunner3314]

Sorry, Alex, I don't swing that way.

[@Brettwbeyer14]

He did say he will eat his neighbor

[@theelite9954]

Alex Jones really knows how to make a guy Santorum himself

[@sawtooth808]

😂😂

[@knowahnosenothing4862]

Alex is a comic genius

[@abygmz]

Kyle just peaks when he goes at Alex Jones. One of my favorite Secular Talk episodes.

[@christophergolla775]

With fava beans and a nice chianti

[@everyonejustcalmdown8820]

Things you never expected to hear in political commentary.. “Chowing down on some b00ty hole” I love this show 😂😂😂

[@billyjackcurtis4680]

When you said you brought it up to your wife i nearly died. Im dying.

[@brehgankage6242]

Love the thumbnail LoL

[@lindarushton6502]

I think, that politicians think we are dumb, and cannot see the behaviour included in the words, vocalisations, that emit from them.

[@MrIkon12izzy]

Your face in the thumbnail tho 😂😂. You like "go ahead".

[@Edkeyz]

Love you Kyle

[@supersaiyanzero386]

"What am I supposed to do with this stuff man" Lmao true