Am I The A**hole 11 - SimplyPodLogical

On this episode of SimplyPodLogical, Cristine and Ben look at posts on the popular subreddit r/amitheasshole and discuss sharing drinks, strangers in wedding photos, waking up your spouse, garden gnomes, slurping spaghetti, and puppet themed weddings.
0:00 - Hey what’s up holo everyone
0:50 - Am I the a**hole because I want my wife to drink my tea less?
7:14 - Am I the a**hole for not wanting strangers in the background of my wedding pictures?
10:49 - Am I the a**hole for telling my husband to stop waking me up?
14:42 - Am I the a**hole for refusing to let my husband’s mom nap in my room?
19:50 - Am I the a**hole for hiding my neighbour’s garden gnome?
25:07 - Am I the a**hole for depriving my wife of water?
29:10 - Am I the a**hole walking out of a restaurant because my girlfriend slurps spaghetti?
39:26 - Am I the a**hole for making our guests participate in our puppet themed wedding?
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[@CookieCreamCrumble]

Every episode of AITA is summarised by these two solutions: Cristine: Communication. Ben: Divorce.

[@monmedusa4955]

No wonder ben never think about marriage because in his mind is divorce🤣

[@flonny1340]

And I don't blame him 💀 marriage?! In this day and age?.! Not in this house 🤣

[@zinc8002]

and he’s right. these women deserve better.

[@Inertiaandforce]

​@@flonny1340 I'm sorry what 💀

[@jayblue6403]

For the husband that keeps waking her up, in the comments she said that he does remember waking her the next day, so it's not something he does subconsciously. He also keeps "losing" alarm clocks. And when she doesn't tell him the time, and says "well, what does your phone say?" he get's pissed and leaves the bed to sleep on the couch. There is no explanation, where the guy isn't the asshole.

[@jennyrice2216]

Wow! Interesting!! That was going to be my solution - to tell him to check his own phone. So yeah, if he gets mad about that and leaves the room then that's not good.

[@Alan_Shv]

this is actually not okay, the above comment stated that it could a sign of abusive behaviour. it's sick

[@thespankmyfrank]

He's abusive. Denying her sleep because he's a baby who can't check the time on his own. Also can't take care of his own child because?? He's just not interested in being a dad I guess? I'd dump him immediately.

[@daphnethegamer]

Yeah, it's terrible.

[@dumpsterfire3214]

how do u even lose an alarm clock

[@genevieve_st.martin]

Some stories on these AITA segments indicate a potentially abusive partner, for example this one about the husband waking her up to ask what time it is. I feel as though Cristine has never been with an abusive partner in her past (which is good!! I wouldn’t wish that on anyone) because she’s always trying to find the logical explanation and can’t seem to understand why someone would treat their partner like this. It’s hard to understand abuse by an intimate partner if you’ve never experienced it.

[@veronikakiss3754]

Exactly. She's trying to justify it and I understand she's coming from a good place but some people are just abusive. And doing things intentionally to hurt their partners. It's sad but it's many people's reality.

[@wt_9026]

as someone who has had that unfortunate experience, 100% sleep control is a REAL abuse pattern. Yes, it could be innocuous, but I can affirm with 12 years of experience and it having taken 6 years to resolve my resulting insomnia... this is big red flag.

[@dantichri5t]

The same story was recently mentioned by Dr. Ramani in her channel about narcissism

[@Blue-iv5fv]

although i hope that this husband is not actually abusive and maybe this is just one AH thing he does among some other AH things that many "men" do out of sheer disregard for anyone else in the relationship. I do agree with the sleep ruining thing as an abusive pattern, my mother does it too. It's not indicative of abuse alone, but i would advise anyone who lives with someone who the op feels like "does not consider them human enough" to put it loosely... to look around for other signs of abuse. Another thing, in my experience... someone who is doing something out of spite will never listen to you trying to explain how much it hurts you... that was my clue...

[@jenthebubble1914]

I was going to say the same thing! Sleep deprivation is a tactic of an abuser. He is also gaslighting her to say she is being unreasonable and acting crazy about it. 🚩🚩🚩🚩

[@roses6225]

Cristine: She loves her son Ben: She wants to sleep with her son I’m crying LOL

[@Labinzel]

Sigmund Freud be like...👀

[@reginaangelica751]

My favorite part of this podcast is that Cristine and Ben doubted the legitimacy of the spaghetti story but not the puppet wedding

[@lilacorn]

My exact thoughts!! 😂😂

[@meggokappo]

Ironically the spaghetti one did turn out to be fake, though haha. Someone linked to a comment where the guy had posted elsewhere that he posts fake AITAs all the time because it's easy karma farming haha.

[@ellew8599]

the puppet wedding one has such palpable ex-theater kid/Disney adult crossover energy that i believe it tho

[@potocatepetl]

@@meggokappo what exactly is the point of "farming" karma? he must be a very bored person and have little validation in his life....

[@alliedearie9167]

Wedding photographer here! Depending on how crowded the background was, many photographers would have to charge extra to edit out all the people. We just capture what happens on the day, and if you choose to get married on a popular beach at a resort then you should expect other people to be in the water. Personally I'm happy to edit 1 or 2 pictures if they're being printed, but if they wanted every single photo to be totally free of any other tourists in the water, they would likely have to pay extra for that. If you want privacy, pick a private location!

[@samantha7148]

Yeah or in some pictures it may even look cool to make the background people blurry and make the couple really stand out? But indeed for some printed photo's you can photoshop them out but also, I guess there must be some space (in front of the sea or some other background) where you can take some official pictures without "background people"? Edit: and yes charging extra for a lot of photoshop seems fair, that's a lot of work hours

[@countryjewel]

Or get married really early in the morning! That's what we did. 😊

[@alliedearie9167]

@@countryjewel we did that too! But it still didn't mean total privacy, we had 2 random hikers stop and watch the entire ceremony haha. We didn't mind and they said congrats after. We were in a national park so it was expected. If people want 100% privacy they just have to use private land!

[@GlassShark86]

How many puppet weddings have your photographed 🤣

[@alliedearie9167]

@@GlassShark86 hahaha none yet but I would do it! Definitely not if they force their entire guest list to buy puppets though 😬

[@veronikakiss3754]

As someone who was abused emotionally by an ex who was also using sleep deprivation as a means of abuse: this isn't funny. He knows fully well what he's doing. He also wakes her up to take care of the baby all the time, I understand he works but SOMETIMES you could take over, like every once in a while. But even if we don't wanna go into that, waking her up to ask what time it is a very asshole thing to do. Especially if she's already sleep deprived due to the baby and takes her a long time to go back to sleep. This is just plain abusive. There's no justifiable reason to defend him. Especially because she said her husband thinks she's making a big deal out of it - that's means she already mentioned this to him and he doesn't give a f*ck and does it intentionally.

[@randomname24680]

Exactly. Even if he didn't realize he was doing it, she told her several times she was bothered and he dismissed it. He literally calls her an asshole for asking him to respect her basic physiological needs. That's a cause for divorce in my eyes.

[@emilymulcahy]

Omg sometimes your issues are not the same as a story you hear, stop projecting, is it an asshole thing to do, yes, but is he abusing his wife because your similar story an abuse situation, NO

[@Abi-gy1sk]

my ex did this too, and it escalated to scaring me awake. it’s a very real way people abuse their partners.

[@veronikakiss3754]

@@emilymulcahy abuse isn't just physical. If you're causing sleep deprivation intentionally to your partner who is already exhausted you are abusing them. That is a fact, not me projecting. Look into it before commenting something stupid like this.

[@emilymulcahy]

@@veronikakiss3754 I understand that but this isn't that

[@RealToWonder]

Growing up, my parents let my brother and I each pick ONE box of cereal every week. My brother always picked Honey Pops, which I hate. I would pick whatever I liked. Then, my brother would eat my cereal first, then start eating his when mine was done. This meant he had a surplus of cereal and I was stuck with toast for breakfast by Wednesday. It was the most enfuriating thing and my parents never stopped it. The fancy milk tea guy is not the asshole. If his wife was only drinking a little bit, that would be fine, but her drinking all of his drink knowing he doesn't like any of her drinks is just rude.

[@mollyrose7142]

Similar thing for my brother and I but with soda. I would drink a coke once a day and he would drink it like water, him and his former gf would buy soda and hid items it in their room but I was expected to share because my mom paid for it. After awhile I hide it in my bedroom and problem solved.

[@CamDollar]

I feel like your family trauma is making you biased because this isn't a brother and sister, or roommates. This is a married couple, who might even have kids. The husband is choosing to have issues because he knows she drinks that drink, then only buys one which is said is "for the household", then gets mad about her having some. He can buy more tea. In a healthy relationship, husband would just buy more than one carton of tea, so they can both drink it, because even he said she loves it. He never once said he buys it JUST for himself, yet he is mad if she drinks it. Choosing to feel disrespected over a solvable issue is a real indication he needs therapy, just like you to fix your food trauma before you act like this to your partner.

[@RealToWonder]

@@CamDollar well, firstly, my brother eating my cereal isn't trauma. It was just really annoying. Secondly, they specifically said the tea was hard to find until very recently. That means they probably couldn't buy a bunch of it. If she knows they only have a single carton of it, she needs to make sure he gets most of it because it's the only one he likes and she has a bunch of other drinks she likes. Now that they've found a new place to get their special tea, this issue will probably be moot, but it's common courtesy to make sure people have something they like to eat and drink available to them.

[@thetiredworm2100]

@@RealToWonder Agreed, it’s inconsiderate and rude!

[@vandanaanand8597]

Difference is the husband and wife are grown adults who can just buy more if needed. As a child, you didn't have the control to buy 2 boxes of your cereal so there was enough for you and your brother.

[@lovethatforyou533]

I would get violent with the "what time is it" guy.. We both work full time yet it is entirely my responsibility to tend to OUR baby during the night and you have the NERVE to wake me to ask a question that you can easily find the answer to on your own. That is SO disrespectful and rude! Living on broken sleep is hard, having a partner that doesn't help is even harder, and for him to make it even harder on her 🤬

[@RealBradMiller]

I would get him an alarm clock that projected the time on the wall, a watch that says the time out loud, a grandfather clock, a sundial, a pocket watch, a cuckoo clock, and when it became too much for him, I would divorce him and then move to an island where no one cares about time and I would drink my life away and then sink into the waves one evening after filling my pockets with watches and putting a giant clock on a chain around my neck... I awake from a nightmare, it was all a dream. I roll over and awaken my wife and I ask her, "Honey, what time is it?"

[@LawnOrnament]

Yea i was thinking that i would end up doing some horrible things to someone that treated me that way lmao. Like I’m putting laxatives in your morning coffee. Have fun on your “longer commute.”

[@missc3535]

Cristine just doesn't believe that some people are just bad people!

[@ratsbelike]

*doesn’t want to

[@flonny1340]

Nah, she doesn't want to see the reality of the world, pretty sad tbh, it's pretty obvious the partner is abusive and she trying to "play the other side" by thinking about it with what's not written there, sounds pretty wrong to me and just shows how much of a bubble she's STILL in. Aka a privileged white person

[@Octobris]

@@flonny1340 projecting much?

[@flonny1340]

@@Octobris no, are you? I mean, you did CHOOSE to reply

[@Labinzel]

@@flonny1340 being privileged and white doesn't mean being an abuse apologist. What seems obvious to some may not to other due to a variety of reasons. Christen didn't recognize this as an abuse tactic but that probably just means she doesn't have experience/familiarity with domestic abuse and that's fine. You don't have to be aware of every nuanced aspect of a social justice issues in order to be a decent person.

[@amandavanderzee9716]

I read the human alarm clock one, and based on the comments from OP, it sounds like it’s deliberate, not a reaction to bad sleep. Which is pretty terrible, a lot of other things about their husband sounds pretty unhinged too, based on their comments to INFO questions ☹️

[@isabellairon8420]

The idea the one person is handling all of the infant stuff at night based on commute length is insane too. Like, and then on top of this the husband purposefully wakes her up at night? That sounds like sleep deprivation hell. Parenting should be shared, not based on commute length wth

[@Kaichannel612]

Sounds almost like OCD behavior

[@berlinkatz7235]

I am also taking 100% care of our baby every night for one year now. That is fine, because living in Germany I am on leave the whole time, but if he would wake me up like this all the time I would explode.

[@jodielarson1530]

@@isabellairon8420 Yes! I 100% agree!!!

[@floaters101]

The mother should wake him up every time she’s feeding the baby to ask what time it is.

[@bigboorito9782]

I really like Ben’s take on these AITA segments! I feel like he always hits the nail on the head. As for the first tea story, I saw in the Reddit comments that the wife mentioned he left out the fact that she is pregnant!! And that the tea USED to be difficult to buy, but is no longer difficult for them to get a hold of. That totally changes things!

[@SaraJHudson]

I dont think being pregnant is a good reason to justify she drinking all the tea even if it's not difficult to find it anymore. I think they should get to an agreement where they buy certain amount of milk for each other and agree to not touch their amount of milk and that's it.

[@hidden_animator522]

@@SaraJHudson i think the fact that she’s pregnant doesn’t really change the fact that if she was taking something rare of his that he bought specifically for him, she would be TA. However, the fact that it is now easy to buy solves this entire problem. There is no conflict here: just buy more of it so they both have enough!!!

[@gummy5862]

@@hidden_animator522 Should you even be drinking all that caffeine when you’re pregnant though?

[@cruztastrophe]

@@gummy5862 Pregnant people can still have caffeine. It's the quantity that changes.

[@gummy5862]

@@cruztastrophe Yes that’s implied when I said “all that caffeine”. Personally, milk tea has the potential to keep me up at night depending how much I drink and how strong it is. Idk if you really want to do that to yourself if you’re pregnant. Plus, yes excess caffeine is dangerous in other ways.

[@Zurflu]

That man is not waking her up by accident. He is being abusive by intentionally ruining her sleep several times a week.

[@alis.b.4631]

I'm not sure if I'd say "abusive", but he's definitely being a major asshole. She already gets her sleep disturbed by her baby.

[@jacqweee]

THIS!!!

[@HollyMills91]

I agree. My husband discounts me taking care of our infant during the night as well. He literally has to be doing it to be passive aggressive at her for "sleeping in"

[@kingchickadee8694]

I think my solution (only if the person isn't being abusive) would be to buy an LED screen clock so all he'd have to do is look over as opposed to reaching over to check a phone

[@ladyk3729]

@@kingchickadee8694 I thought about getting one that projects the time on the ceiling. Buy him one of those and set it up so it projects over the bed and if he still wakes up to ask her what time it is then make him sleep somewhere else!

[@laceym3662]

To address the gnomes issue: From a parent's perspective, I think Ben is spot-on. . You want to show your kids by example that fears are okay but that you can't let them ruin uour life. Trying to change the world around you to make sure your children are never afraid of anything won't help them, and in fact will make things harder for them in the future. There are scary things in the world, even as an adult! Helping them work through their fears will help them be resilient.

[@dantichri5t]

I'm certainly not a teenager, and I'm aware that people have complained about new generations since Socratres... However, when I see some young people ( I do understand they're an unnecessarily vocal minority ) mentioning trigger warnings for things that just... exist, I wonder how they will cope in life once normal people get bored of treading on eggshells for fear of offending the perpetually offended and Oppression Olympic participants. It is depressing to see some teenagers traumatised if others doesn't use their made up pronouns. I remember when it was still acceptable to wish me eternal damnation for my sexual preferences and I could hardly bother to acknowledge those idiots' existence.

[@baileyt640]

I’ve read somewhere that avoiding your fears reinforces them and makes them stronger. So removing the gnome is more than likely going to be counterproductive for the kid. Also just don’t touch people stuff 😤

[@soniquecat4745]

I worked as a teacher's assistant to an autistic kid, whose mother coddled all their irrational fears. In the end they were scared to walked through the door. Each time new fear popped in, their mommy would coddle it and pretty much make it legitimate. It started with a B line of subway having some sort of lever. So mommy was "oh, let's avoid those evil levers" instead of trying to show the kid "look, all these people ride the subway and nobody is hurt by the lever". The kid ended up in psych ward for few months, because they feared the entire world.

[@nuclearseahorse]

Literally just stop having unrealistic expectations for wedding guests and you've eliminated 1/4th of the AITA situations

[@fortheloveofLDS]

You can get another half with kid and in-law drama. Personally I'm most interested in the remaining 1/4 that have a chance of being unique and thought-provoking.

[@vernss3092]

The puppet request was fine for their puppeteer friends. It is unreasonable to expect other guests to use puppets. It is not easy to work puppets, and would be a source of stress for some.

[@nuclearseahorse]

That's what I thought. That's like forcing everyone to like... sing everything they say at the wedding because you and your spouse are in musical theatre. What a wild expectation to have

[@millicentbystander4502]

also very chaotic, id imagine that by the end of the night there are just piles of random puppets left on tables when people get drunk/sleepy

[@kingchickadee8694]

@@millicentbystander4502 I was wondering something similar: what happens to all these puppets after the wedding? If no one wants to keep their puppet, does that mean the bride and groom will keep all of them? What if you have 100 guests that don't want the puppets?? 🤔

[@binkao2938]

I disagree. I don’t think it’s unreaa at all. It’s their wedding.

[@nuclearseahorse]

@@binkao2938 in a way you're right, they don't have to go the wedding and then they'll be the "assholes" for not wanting to participate. However, if the majority of the guests you invite don't want to come to your wedding, then it's kind of your responsibility to fix that unless you want 5 guests at your very expensive puppet wedding.

[@tchaugn]

I think the seltzer lady can do whatever lol but also creating this narrative to her family that he's "depriving her of a basic need" LMAO unhinged

[@thetiredworm2100]

Ya I laughed at that😂😂this is the type of family that doesn’t buy a water filter and drinks only bottled water probably.

[@ravenofroses]

for the spaghetti thing, the issue really isn't whether the guy is too sensitive about the noise/messiness or not. the issue is him setting boundaries, getting explicit confirmation from his gf beforehand that she would respect them, and then having her go back on her word. whether she understands how big a deal it was to him is debatable, but it's clear that they need to sit down and have a conversation about this. part of relationships is learning to work around each other's quirks and discomforts. and with the info we're given, it sounds like the gf isn't doing that.

[@thetiredworm2100]

Yes, agreed!

[@nopeanutzallowed]

its a power move to take over the "master bedroom". its a way to maintain dominance. I have a mother who tries this with myself, and all of my siblings too.

[@thetiredworm2100]

So weird

[@Culo_Sniffin_Cheezit]

Ik this sounds abusive, but that was the funniest sentence I've read

[@tejaswiharshavardhan]

Only other thing that may be at play is that the guest bedroom is up another set of stairs or not near a bathroom. My mum has that issue so when she wants a nap during the day she doesn't want to go up and down due to mobility issues, but its probably not that.

[@aina3387]

For the gnome one, if my kid was scared, then all of a sudden the gnome would have a name and a backstory and we would be saying hi to the gnome and he would be leaving candy on the front porch for good little boys and girls 😉.

[@RoarinRachel]

Yes, exactly! I'd help my kid overcome the fear as well.

[@tchaugn]

and he kidnaps bad boys and girls lmao turns them into gnomes

[@Lalaundercover389]

Aw,taking notes for when my when my future kids develop little fears

[@nateabahazi9454]

And honestly this is also a solid tactic for yourself as an adult dealing with paranoia, do what you can to make it less scary, if you allow yourself or your child to avoid your/their fear you will continue to avoid it until it controls your life, which is just an awful experience

[@theblackenedphoenix]

My 6 yr old daughter was scared of taking baths for a month because her older brother convinced her she would go down the drain. She only got over it when I stood in the bathtub and showed her it was impossible to fit through. Kids are weird.

[@lillygonzalez7287]

“She wants to sleep with her son” - Ben “NOOO” - Cris 😂😂

[@WYIN98]

😆😆😆😆

[@nightvisitor6079]

Ben: You can't dance without hands Irish Dancers: Am I a joke to you?

[@Laura-mw7gq]

People without hands: am I a joke to you?

[@veronikakiss3754]

@@Laura-mw7gq OMG

[@faeryvixenetc]

best comment(s) yet!

[@Zizalaonfire]

But Bens right, they kinda look like penguins a bit…

[@kaylajaned6764]

I would suspect the mom that wanted to nap on her son and his wife’s bed would escalate from napping on the bed to wanting that bedroom

[@aminated7027]

I would just constantly say or do things to subtly remind the mom that they have sex in that bed. Leave lingerie pieces or a pack of condoms out (sex toys if you want to be very overt and petty but personally that's too much for me lol)

[@LawnOrnament]

After having so many horrible experiences having friends and family live with me, even short term, i have had to ban my house from being used as a hotel. People get way too comfortable, way too quickly and start disrespecting your home. I love to host, but anything longer than three or four days is a no.

[@samalalas]

Puppet couple should have a puppet making station at their wedding with brown paper bags that people can choose to add details to make it in their likeness. I’m imagining the old Fandango commercial puppets. Wouldn’t be high quality muppets but I think that would be a fun and inexpensive way to bring their hobby in to it while being a fun activity for their guests

[@CHLOEDEATHGOD]

I was thinking this too! Or you can even do sock puppets. That would be very fun

[@SophiaTellman]

This would be a perfect way to entertain guests between the wedding and ceremony instead of a stupid cocktail hour.

[@aussiecountry9320]

I agree, wanting to have guests have puppets is totally reasonable, they just went about the stipulations in the wrong way. Especially because its basically asking people to spend 100-500 dollars on something they will use one day and will neve be used again, so its rather wastefull in money. But something like your suggestion is a great option to incorperate puppets with the guests while still being reasonable and considerate.

[@EllieMoonHaven]

@@aussiecountry9320 well I don't think it's a waste it's their big day and I think of it as a destination wedding. Not alot of pple can afford a trip to Hawaii or Fiji for your wedding but for those who can well great. But it's their big day and what ever they want to do good for the just don't be surprised if ppl say no thanks on going🤷‍♀️

[@adamlambboy8332]

I wouldn’t go to the puppet themed wedding. It would be one thing if they supplied the puppets and wanted everyone to use them, it’s another to expect someone to spend 150 dollars on a puppet they’re never going to use again.

[@heathermcgrath4541]

Agreed! If they were providing the puppets then it's just a weird eccentricity. But they're not, they're expecting literally all of their guests to pay upwards of 150 dollars?! On puppets?!

[@tianna1116]

I feel the same way but I feel like the devils advocate view on it would be likening it to spending on travel, or on formal wear. My husband and I went to a wedding last year and we spent way more than $150 on it, and we’re not rich my any means

[@cristinabaeza5163]

they did say it's in lieu of gifts ! so it's not "asshole behavior" but it is a bit unreasonable

[@wt_9026]

yup. I was invited to a theme bridal shower where we were all to dress in southern belle (code for plantation chic so BARF anyway)... I was not going to buy a specific outfit for a one-off event and asked host if just a floral dress would be ok. No? alright then, here's my regrets.

[@sammi1078]

@@cristinabaeza5163 I think the difference is that if I were to buy a couple a $150 gift for their wedding it's probably a really useful gift they will use frequently. Even if they take the puppets and use them for some of the shows, they really don't need all of those puppets. I'd much rather get them a really nice kitchen aid or some other expensive appliance that will get a lot of use out of it for many years

[@lquidore]

Regarding the beach pictures, you are taking photos on public property. You cannot stop people from going about their daily lives. If you want private photos, rent the land.

[@emily191]

Exactly what they said

[@esmeraldagreengate4354]

Or you could just ask the photographer to Photoshop them out 🤷‍♀️

[@samantha7148]

Yeah or just photoshop random people out

[@leetaylormorris]

I know y'all don't plan to Wed but Ben is on to something with this donkey Kong wedding!!

[@Mmorguemusic]

Period

[@CeaseEcho]

Oof... it was my partner AND he dismissed my needs by waking me up like that my vindictive butt would wait until he fell back to sleep and wake up him. Then I would repeat the process until he rethinks his stance and realizes using his phone to see what time is better than poking the mama bear who is taking care of the baby more than he is during the night. "If I don't sleep, you won't sleep. Bhahahah!"

[@WYIN98]

My same thoughts

[@theuseriwantedwastaken]

Exactly😂

[@gabrielagarland3372]

I DIDN'T GET NO SLEEP CAUSE OF Y'ALL, Y'ALL AIN'T GONNA GET NO SLEEP CAUSE OF ME! 😂

[@coleyoley420]

🤣🤣 Damn, I miss that show.

[@norikadolmy7274]

Even if I could afford a $500 puppet, I wouldn't necessarily want one

[@martianpudding9522]

I think the puppet wedding is mostly unreasonable because they're also expecting all of these people who are not puppeteers to perform with puppets all day. Like that's work, just because it's your hobby doesn't mean anyone should be willing to do it for any amount of time you tell them.

[@PotatoRed148]

For the spaghetti lady, if he told her that the slurpy slurp noise makes him uncomfortable and she promise not to eat spaghetti with him in public and still does it, it's her fault.

[@r.i.pmydog7723]

I think his reaction was way to dramatic tho, just standing and waking away the second his larger order spaghetti is juts kinda nuts. She deserve an apology but they should both have a talk about it.

[@vyabillie4415]

@@r.i.pmydog7723 i disagree. He set the boundaries before they went and she thought she could be spiteful without dealing with the consequences.

[@berlinkatz7235]

I think they are too young and he cares way too much about what other people might think, but he was clear in his wishes and actions. She didn’t respect him and probably didn’t think he would go through with it. As I said, they are young and have to learn a lot about relationships and communication.

[@shazayum3757]

@@r.i.pmydog7723 If he has misophonia, it's not overdramatic.

[@bevishhh]

@@shazayum3757 true. But it is a him problem not a her problem. She definitely could've been more respectful of *his* discomfort, for sure. But the narrative of it being inappropriate behaviour in public is low-key ableist tbh. It suggests people who can't eat "properly" shouldn't go to restaurants and that's just not the case.

[@pescecanella4742]

She wants to control!!! It has never been about naps or the bed, it is about controling space, the relationship and ultimately him.

[@G1hana]

For seltzer lady, flat seltzer actually will have a different flavor profile than regular water - carbonating water involves pumping a bunch of carbon dioxide into it, and a byproduct of that process is carbonic acid. So even when the actual gas is gone, the carbonic acid that remains in the water gives it a slightly sour taste. But I agree with Ben & Cristine's overall assessment of the situation in general - they were both being somewhat insensitive to each other's views

[@averlinbc5680]

I don’t really have a problem with the water thing it’s not like she’s pouring it down the sink for fun she’s drinking It ….. so it doesn’t matter how she does that

[@Sherri84]

Having a son myself, I wouldn't want to nap where I know my son and his wife were... You can feel in the blank

[@jaz9915]

The seltzer one: just buy a Soda Stream and add a tiny bit of carbonation. Way cheaper for what the wife seems to want

[@Limette454]

Ok, but bottled waters can have other kinds of minerals than the local tab water so .. maybe they should filter the Tab water.

[@leahbelieva]

The tea one resonated with me because my husband used to always drink ALL of the iced coffee. I had purchased enough for each of us to have some each day but he was drinking more than a glass leaving me with none. I was annoyed. Simple solution. We bought more coffee. The spaghetti one was annoying on Twitter. A lot of people showed themselves by basically saying they don’t have to respect other people’s boundaries. Husband set a boundary (he didn’t want to be around her when she ate spaghetti) wife agreed to respect the boundary and then IMMEDIATELY crossed it intentionally. Husband made good on his boundary by removing himself from the situation. 🤷🏻‍♀️ wife played a stupid game and won a stupid prize.

[@misstatty3455]

This! The spaghetti one was a boundary!

[@rainestar82]

the finishing the meal, then giving the silent treatment and THEN yelling he embarrassed her...like if I were embarrassed I wouldnt stay and finish the meal. And she lied to him to manipulate him when he was clearly not trying to limit her eating out...yeah, the wife is def an ahole who doesnt respect boundaries

[@Shirumoon]

@@misstatty3455 It's so sad and hypocritical that there's all this talk about boundaries nowadays but when someone uses and enforces boundaries the correct way (= controlling *your own* actions after explaining your needs), everyone's offended. Do y'all expect people to let others walk all over them so that they can claim themselves as victims at the end? Hell no, draw a line before it gets worse. My therapist would be proud of him.

[@mrshmllw12]

For the gnome one - What a parenting technic is that 🤣 Instead of teaching your child about different feelings and ways to cope with them you erase the problematic object. IMAGINE if this child is scared of some dog one day and he tells the neighbour to stop walking the dog because his son is scared. And what if they refuse? At the same time I'm wondering if he's paying the same about of attention to what his 5 yo son is watching on yt since he himself says that some yt video might be the reason of gnome fear. What tf is this toddler watching?

[@nassj6593]

On the sleeping mother in law, that it's the couple's room. If one of them is not comfortable with other people on their room, then it should be respected. If there is a specific reason of why the mother in law can't sleep and nap in her assignated room, like she has problems climbing the stairs or the light or windows arrangement of the room above for napping. Other than that, people, your significant other is the most important person and it's the person that you need to respect and agree. Anyone else, regardless of what relative it is, then is secondary.

[@momahl114]

Agreed but I appreciate you understanding there might be legitimate reasons other than being a monster in law needing to control her son. It’s sad their take on it and the comments on this video. People usually buy a new bed when their bed becomes uncomfortable but it’s such an expensive purchase so they keep it for guests. There are so many reasons why mom might want to nap on their bed when they’re not home. I don’t think husband should allow it if wife is uncomfortable but the assumptions that she is crazy are unfortunate.

[@ibpanrioe]

@@momahl114 maybe it's because the post only mentioned that the Mom just wants to sleep there but didn't try to make the guest bed more comfortable to nap. Rather the mom wanted it HER way and OP's husband supports his mom.

[@momahl114]

@@ibpanrioe the post was in the op’s pov so of course it is written in the light most favorable to her. It seems like the OP didn’t even try to understand any reasoning at all.

[@niveusnimbus]

@@momahl114 in my opinion, my mother in law shouldn't even have stepped into mine and my partner's bedroom to find out how comfy our bed is. That's crossing a boundary. If she has issues with her bed, then she needs to communicate about that.

[@aussiecountry9320]

@@niveusnimbus I agree, its more or less an invasion of privacy. The room doesnt just belong to her son, its also her daughter in laws. Especially when she has her own room while she's staying with them.

[@Leharfri]

On my way to school, when I was 7 or 8 years old, there was one house with an optical illusion face that looks like it's eyes are following you when you walk by. I was afraid of that thing. I remember my dad going to the house with me and he tried to explain how it worked. That really helped me overcome my irrational fear.

[@rizcakez97]

I think the puppet one is more financially unreasonable when you consider every single person would need to buy their own, and adults who plan to bring their children would have to buy multiple ones. At a typical wedding you wouldn't expect to get a gift from every single individual, INCLUDING one from each individual kid. However, a family of 4 attending that wedding would be required to spend $600-2k on puppets... which makes you realize how much more unreasonable it is

[@TheAdrift]

Plus there’s the fact that, like… will the couple keep the puppets? Or will every guest be stuck with a $200 thing that they might never use again? I guess their fellow puppeteers might use them, but even then, they probably already have some, orrrr? idk how any of this shit works 🤣 I think it’d be a cute idea to have people MAKE puppets-like maybe the events leading up to the wedding (bridal shower, bachelor(ette) party, etc) could be a workshop where they make them with their friends, or maybe it’d be a fun craft for the kiddos, whatever. Then, on the day, have them wear the puppets they made ONLY IN THE PICTURES… and like, not force them to carry that shit around all day lmao

[@eve12171]

I don't really agree with this argument, wouldn't you buy a more expensive gift if going as a family as opposed to just a couple or single person? Like Ben said your gift should at least cover the cost of your meal(s) so it doesn't seem entirely unreasonable for me that a family would spend 600$. What does seem unreasonable is that kids or older people would likely struggle to hold a puppet for hours on end...

[@camille744]

Also lots of times guests will bring a +1 or spouse to a wedding but they may not be as close to the parties. It seems odd that they’d also have to do the puppeting things and go through the trouble of getting a custom puppet.

[@randomly8159]

@@eve12171 what wedding did you go to that the meal for a family with children was $600? Here in Spain we usually have adult meals cost arround 90€, you should be 6+ people to arrive at 600€!

[@eve12171]

@@randomly8159 It's not just the meal though is it, it's also the gift for the couple that should be included

[@blakeblack5647]

That puppet story is so unhinged and funny to me. I meeeaaannn the pictures would be hilarious but I’m just wondering what kind of people this couple are. If they’d communicated the whole thing less strictly, like „hey if you want you can buy or make your own puppet to join the fun“ I think it would have been quite fun probably. It’s still less crazy to me than people demanding a super expensive dress code 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@gummy5862]

Idk expecting EVERY guest to pay $150 (at LEAST) for a damn puppet is very unreasonable.

[@princessnatty]

This would be cool & fun if: 1) they provided them (either by renting or buying, their choice) 2) there was instances they were used, maybe ceremony were guest are encouraged to use them to react, photos, cheers at meal, first dance. Then left as a mini group photo style.

[@felisa957]

“My son is afraid of our neighbor’s garden gnome. The gnome is just a normal gnome, with a gardening hoe and a basket of flowers…” - this sounds like an opening line to an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark 😳🙈

[@XSemperIdem5]

What if the kid watched something he was not allowed to watch and that's why he's afraid of it but won't say because he doesn't want to get in trouble?

[@mauirandall8176]

​@@XSemperIdem5Not allowed to watch? Goosebumps is rated G.

[@maxinekeyes3467]

For the tea guy: his wife is pregnant, and she said they found a reliable place to buy his milk tea. These two factors made most people judge him to be the asshole!

[@isabellaearnhardt6380]

Thank you! That explains it

[@curlysammm6387]

Yes! I saw this thread on reddit already---- the wife commented and gave crucial context that makes the guy the AH.

[@curlysammm6387]

Yes! I saw this thread on reddit already---- the wife commented and gave crucial context that makes the guy the AH.

[@nuclearseahorse]

Oof for that guy but yay for context

[@lululu_]

Plus the tea guy's statement "I said she's drinking more of it than I am" has an a**hole-y tone to me, even without his wife's follow up statement.

[@greylizard1040]

Dr. Ramani read the alarm clock story on her channel and suggested the wife buy the husband an alarm clock that projects the time onto the ceiling or the wall so that it's nice and visible for him, and maybe even putting a single bed in the baby's room and sleeping in there if the husband can't learn some healthy boundaries. Sleep deprivation is a tactic narcissists use to break people down mentally. Gnome boy needs to suck it up, like Ben says this is a good opportunity for the parents to teach their child to adapt and face their fears. They lost a good neighbour. If they face every parenting issue like this, there will be a lot of conflict, and the child won't be exposed to healthy problem solving techniques. There might be one or two people that show up to that puppet wedding that aren't already into puppets. It sounds like a really awkward / expensive plan to expect people to be a part of.

[@Mads97415]

Just wanted to say I nearly did a spit take when Cristine said, “asking people to leave THE OCEAN” at 8:42 😂

[@rpaperson]

For the spaghetti one, first I’d never date someone who makes mouth noises, and second the husband set a boundary and she deliberately crossed it. I bet she does that with other things too…

[@vyabillie4415]

Were they spouses or just roomates?

[@ChrissaTodd]

@@vyabillie4415 they are q couple he literally says it's his gf they moved in and he loves her lol

[@vyabillie4415]

@@ChrissaTodd yes I did go back and check but if this is where their relationship is going they need to put in some serious effort if they want it to work out

[@gummy5862]

Yea assuming my partner was like that, they better be perfect in literally every other aspect or else I’m not putting up with it.

[@mauirandall8176]

​​@@gummy5862and willing to go to couples therapy cuz this is clearly something that will not resolve on its own.

[@pegaseg70]

I am autistic, no matter the back story or anything for the gnome (or statues), nothing would make me feel less fearful, that's just how my brain is wired with unmoving things However, I would never ask someone to remove the gnome from the yard I will avoid it or if I can't, pep talk myself into seeing it, the world doesn't revolve around me

[@AmethystNotTaken]

About the second story: People need to understand that laws and regulations vary by country… in this case, Mexican beaches are all public, there are no private beaches and Bridezilla should’ve looked into that before going to a different country to try and make her own rules. The beach-goers and everyone else was right to say no to her stupid request. Edit: A word

[@misstatty3455]

The husband keep waking her up, I had an ex doing this (not exactly but very similar) to the point I was crying with tiredness . It was a form of abuse from him. 😳

[@thetiredworm2100]

That’s so bizarre, what is wrong with people.

[@misstatty3455]

@@thetiredworm2100 very bizzare. People can be awful

[@OliviaGlarden]

There is a japanese milk tea I enjoy that is expensive and almost never in stock and i would be pissed if my spouse was binge drinking it all.

[@kayenjee]

Cristine: Maybe he isn't waking her up on purpose 😇 Also Cristine: Secretly record him...for his benefit 😈

[@gnomie06]

😂 the Muppet talk was my favorite. I totally agree with Ben that The Muppet Christmas Carol is the only way to consume Charles Dickens lol definitely my favorite version of it!

[@Damanique]

I have misophonia and when I hear eating noises I become infuriated. It's why I will put on music if I'm eating with someone. If my partner was not considerate of my condition I would eventually break up with them and in the past I have stopped dating people who could not eat with their mouth closed. That's something you should figure out before moving your relationship to a more serious level.

[@TheKai1412]

Yes as someone who also has misophonia I came here to mention this! Especially if someone knowingly and intentionally is trying to trigger it! It’s more than just being annoyed by the sound (obviously don’t know the details in this situation, and I personally I would also listen to music or something). I think this is just something important to add to the conversation in general!

[@msmccrabbleapple]

Yep I have autism and misophonia and I always disclose with people before going out to eat with them that I may need to sit at a certian seat or listen to music or even leave the situation if the noise becomes too overwhelming.

[@XSemperIdem5]

But he didn't state that as being his reason. He went more into it being embarrassing and worrying about what other people might think. But if they're already having arguments over spaghetti eating methods, they need to re-evaluate if they'll even be willing to work through important issues or if they're just not compatible.

[@novah8906]

i love how they didn’t defend spaghetti girl cuz i heard this story on another podcast where they defended her. i think slurping is breakup worthy

[@mauirandall8176]

Slurping is a massive turn off (outside the bedroom) But the real offense is just the insane disrespect were you knowingly upset somebody in public and then get pissed off at them because they were mature and enforced their boundaries in a completely respectable way. Also yelling to yourself in the other room so they can hear it is unnerving.

[@jadziajan]

"Okay, I don't have a problem with puppets-" "But I have a problem with Charles Dickens." I don't know why that got me, lol. I think Cristine's reaction to the second story was a little upsetting, though. I don't blame her for it, but there were a lot of tells that this was an abusive situation and the wife was already having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that her husband is harming her. People in toxic or abusive situations already try to justify the other person's actions, and it's slightly odd for someone to comment on the situation by coming up with a completely different theory with no proof at all. But again, I don't blame Cristine - it's hard to believe in some people's abusive tactics, and you wish there'd be an explanation.

[@jaybirb3754]

40:15 "I'd like to slurp smt else" PLS IM CRYING

[@SarahUzelac]

OMG I missed that hahahahaha

[@AllieDuguid100]

For the seltzer experiment you guys want to do, you can make the seltzer water flat by shaking the bottle and then opening it between shakes for a few minutes. To ensure extra flatness, you can leave it open for another hour after that but that's what I do to make some alcoholic drinks flat because the carbination in some makes me sick. I can confirm that the taste of flat seltzer is different than water but she probably doesn't drink it completely flat anyway, she may be like me where the excess carbonation makes her a bit sick

[@MaryDan]

“Does it pass the threshold of unreasonable slurpy?” - Simply Quote of the Year 2022

[@kristib6983]

For the tea one, I don't think it matters if she's pregnant... Just buy more if it's readily available. Alarm clock is deff assholery No way is anyone else than me and my husband sleeping in our bed lol A it's messy B she needs to respect your privacy C it's just weird Don't touch your neighbor's stuff! You don't have any input on your neighbor's property unless it breaks an HOA or city code.

[@AndreeCynthia]

The garden gnome one reminds me of that one Black Mirror episode titled Arkangel. The mom had a traumatic experience where her daughter went missing at the park. So she got this chip implanted on the daughter, which served as a tracker (including a way to read her vital signs, stress levels, and what she sees/hears). The mom "blocked" the barking dog they passed by every day but she started blocking more and more things. Later down the episode the daughter is older, the implant thing isn't being used and as time went on, she passed that dog. Every day she walked by that dog and she eventually wasn't scared anymore. Definitely a great episode of Black Mirror to watch!

[@yuukadoodles]

Omg the waking someone while they're sleeping for the time scenario gave me anxiety. My bf (of 10 yrs) while I love him he can be super annoying doing stuff like this. I'll be asleep while he's awake and he will come into our room and wake me up to talk about politics or some talk show and get upset when I obviously don't care about whatever he's talking about. He doesn't do it enough to cause serious issues but sometimes it will cause uneasiness and general annoyance for the rest of the day because of it. (I have sleep issues and don't hit 3rd REM though so normally im only in a half sleep state anyways; it's just extra infuriating when i'm actually getting good sleep and he does this.)

[@MsAnnaSpatz]

I love how completely unhinged this episode is in terms of the stories but also in their reactions and discussions.. Perfect podcast material

[@rainabecker2250]

My parents are both family law attorneys in the states and I told them about the first AITA with the tea. I told them Cristine’s pov and Ben’s pov and they said that Ben was 100% correct in his theory. 🤣

[@jaz9915]

The puppet one: this couple is the very definition of "there's a lid for every pot" 😂 I'd be pretty annoyed if I was asked to buy a high-quality puppet for a wedding, and I would likely find an excuse to not go 🤷‍♀️ is one thing to make your wedding your own, it's another to force guests to do something they're not into for an entire evening

[@mindys1198]

I think the gnome lady should take her child to a garden center and let him pick out a gnome that he likes then they can gift it to the neighbor and ask that he let the nice gnomee be friends with the scary gnome adding a little kindness to the situation might make them a little more understanding a child's fear even if it's irrational is very real to the child and it's hard to avoid your front lawn alternatively they could put up a fence so they don't have to look at it.

[@chloewilliams1702]

I think that’s good solution (with the exception of putting up a fence)! Fences are incredibly expensive, take a bit to build, and this is all assuming that they are homeowners that wouldn’t need clearance from an HOA or something like that. There are definitely cheaper and more reasonable solutions than adding a fence to the property. I will say, the new friendly gnome is a great idea bc it could not only help the child overcome their fear, but act as an apology and work towards repairing the relationship with their neighbor too ☺️

[@liyanaashaari6265]

The sleep one unlocked a repressed memory, when I was with an ex, he was a very light sleeper. Audiobooks to get to sleep, room has to be complete darkness, he had to have an eye mask etc. I wasn't bothered, I get to sleep fairly easy, plus I was on antidepressants at the time that made me drowsy. The thing is he would wake me up in the middle of the night, whenever he would wake up. At first I thought, hmm maybe I'm just becoming a light sleeper, but then he would admit "If I'm up you have to be up too". That should've been the red flag I saw, but I allowed it, thought it was funny sometimes even, until he started blaming me for his shit sleep bc I was snoring. I felt really bad, and tried everything I could to stop the snoring, those little nose bandaid things, adjusting sleep positions etc (I'm 5'1 and 100 lbs, it definitely wasn't a weight issue). Every morning, he'd blame me and get upset with me. Finally, I decided to get one of those sleep recording apps to see when I snored, if I could figure something out. I recorded for a week and suspiciously, I wasn't snoring! The most I did was breathe out loud a couple times, like a sigh, and turn over. The most noise came on his end when he was mumbling in his sleep. He hadn't known I was recording, and still said I woke him up bc of my snoring. This mf was gaslighting me! At the end of the day, I just said, if my sleep is bothering you someone can sleep in the spare bed and be done with it. Luckily I came to my senses eventually and he's an ex.

[@Zubbum1]

I know Cris and Ben don't want to actually want to get married but a donky Kong wedding sounds amazing I'd love to see it

[@DashValkyrie]

I think the bride in the second one was probably in "I want everything to be perfect" wedding stress mode and had that kinda tunnel vision where reasonable solutions don't even occur to you.

[@melonnailart]

Ben's solution to all mariage problems: Divorce 😂😂😂 I'm dead

[@RoarinRachel]

Re the Gnome situation: Cristine's reaction cracked me up. Yes, Simply, parents care about their children's irrational fears 😂 & we don't laugh in their face & tell them it's silly. Y'all are right though - the parent doesn't seem to know how to react to their child's emotions. They should focus on getting to the "why" of the fear & teaching them how to handle their fear instead. 100%.

[@rickim1061]

Okay the tea guy. I understand. It’s hard to find club mate in Australia and when we do it’s very expensive. I love it, it’s my special little treat. I’d be mad if my partner just drank it without asking or without telling me he might want some when we’re buying it (so I could buy more). Also, like Cristine I think my partner and I would just be more considerate and ask the other if we could have some before taking something that’s not yours.

[@fishndchick2228]

For the first one, I Saw that on Reddit and pretty quicly after posting the wife in question commented. She said this drink used to be harder to get but they found a supplier and were stocked up and they had multiple bottles in the house. She only had 2/3 of this one bottle because she's pregnant and had morning sickness and this tea was the only thing she could keep down This dude was being a bigger baby than his unborn fetus.

[@christietm]

The “second fridge money” joke carrying over from Ben’s stream kills me every time 🤣

[@mincassie]

For the puppet one, it would be cute if people got to make their own puppet before or at the wedding, like a sock puppet. I think homemade puppets would be so cute because people could put their personality and creativity into making them. It would be more reminiscent of when the bride and groom first started learning to make them. But asking people to spend hundreds for that one occasion is a bit much to me. Even going with the basic $150, if you are not into puppets you use it for those few hours, and then what do you do with it?

[@_ainyy]

About the water, it will definitely taste different because of the (i think) base they add to give it the bubbles, so it should have a slightly bitter taste, even if it's flat.

[@Baeoah]

The energy in this podcast seemed so much more chaotic and fun than the others 🤣🤣🤣 It felt like everyone was more relaxed and maybe uplifted/not shouldering as many burdens behind the scenes. I loved it and hope you are both doing really well 💕

[@faeryvixenetc]

I agree! the whole vibe was way more fun than recent ones

[@Dandelionqween]

For the gnome one, I think it would really help the kid if their parent (the og poster) would just walk with them to get the ball, or kinda point out how it isn’t scary. Kids can get scared really easily, but it’s also a good way to teach a lesson on how to deal with scary things. It could be a good learning experience for the parent and child without harassing the neighbor.

[@astute_potato]

I started reading AITA regularly because of this series, and it’s finally gotten to the point that as soon as Ben reads the title I know exactly what post they’re talking about lmao

[@Fayetality91]

🤣 Ben: I've never been an a-hole Also Ben: Time outs for the entirety of his own chat

[@Bentendo]

okay katie

[@WYIN98]

I was timed out and still don't know why! (not mad, just adding to the comment)

[@Fayetality91]

@@WYIN98 as an Aries I can confirm it's just that chaos energy lol I have been that way; jesting with someone and they take it seriously, but it was never really intended to be mean. I think that is Ben lol just enjoys giving everyone a hard time.

[@Taemaria]

😂😂😂

[@thischickDEJ]

@@WYIN98 werent u the one who disliked spicy food? 😂😂😂

[@jazminjoyce4253]

Ben: I love that you're trying to make it seem reasonable... Cris: Film him! Set up a nest cam!

[@eretria3056]

For the first AMTA- since my husband can sit down and eat a whole bag of chips or candy without noticing, i have a drawr with a lock and key that i keep all my fav chips and candy in. The guy should get a mini fridge with a lock on it. Its that spimle!

[@frostybubble9195]

Also for the puppet one even if guests could afford the puppet, they might not share your interest in them and now they are stuck with a $150-$500 puppet that is just gonna collect dust in a closet somewhere. Why not just in lieu of gift ask for a small financial contribution and rent however many puppets for each guest for the day.

[@jbcherry13]

Ben: Could you imagine someone dancing without their hands moving at all?! Terrible! The Irish: 😱

[@belindarocky961]

34:31 "Well that's corn, Cristine" 😆😆 Always love listening to both of your takes on AITA 💕

[@anaarias1993]

For the puppet story. A couple buys a gift and it’s $100 but for the puppets each adult would need to buy one so instead of it being $100-$500 the range for a couple would actually be $200-$1,000.

[@borderlinepup1603]

As someone planning a themed wedding (mine is medieval), I can understand the want to have your guests participate, for example; my guests have to wear period-accurate costumes, I have asked every guest personally if this would be an issue and if so there are costumes provided by my venue. So far only one person had an issue. I think there is a way to do a themed wedding like that without making guests uncomfortable. I don't think it's unreasonable to want puppets at your wedding but you do have to make sure you're not forcing people to do something they are uncomfortable with especially when weddings are quite long and exhausting on their own 😅

[@thetiredworm2100]

Yes, a lovely example of doing it right!

[@rosamaywild]

I love Taco Tuesday! The AITA saga is my favorite. You both make my day and love hearing your opinions and views.

[@dawnelemental597]

About the puppet wedding: I think the most bothersome thing about it is that they're insisting that the guests have the puppets on them during the whole party. Can you imagine being an entire evening doing everything with one hand because the other one has the puppet? It hinders the experience of how fun a wedding party can be.

[@mauirandall8176]

Set up a kids table where anybody can put their puppets for a break and have like an event or to where everybody's encouraged to use them. Even then I don't think people can be that happy about spending hundreds of dollars on a puppet instead of giving a gift to the couple. Ask for money and lieu of gifts and buy the puppets yourself

[@emilyshepherd2190]

The “We could feed each other hummus in bed” section had me laughing so hard 😂

[@Katie-jm2bs]

The puppet wedding - have the bridal/groom party have puppets which the bride and groom pay for. Don’t force your guests to have puppets…

[@user-pn7yw8ks3s]

for the puppet: i think they should get somewhat cheap puppets, dress them up a bit, and prop them around the wedding as if they were humans. Make them sit between the other people, have one hold a tissue, them getting their food, talking to guests, dancing, all that. Photos could be really funny like that and you wouldn't force people into using them the entire day

[@flugansomintekomhem]

Ben: Do you like the Muppets? Cristine: I do not recall. This exchange made me laugh so load for some reason.

[@neonmellow]

On the puppet thing, I'd think it was unreasonable and wasteful to expect me to spend $150 on something that I don't have any interest in keeping or storing. And if I don't want to keep it, I would have to figure out how to sell it. No thank you.

[@claudiaarbona9984]

i’d be worried if the tea thing was a sign of a larger problem of her dismissing his wants and claiming he’s an asshole for expressing them. but, if the issue is simply with the tea, i think it’s fair for the wife to recognize that she’s the one being a brat

[@deusadosgatos9185]

it seems that they decided that he was a asshole because of the extra info: she's pregnant and she gound a place to buy more tea

[@claudiaarbona9984]

@@deusadosgatos9185 fair point, context matters! whatever the case, i hope they’re doing better now!

[@verarendes9707]

@@claudiaarbona9984 this was one of the few lighthearted stories, the wife and husband responded together jokingly later on:)

[@KarianForde]

"I'd love to slurp something else!" BEEEEYYNNNNN!!!!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@tryandsaycecili]

I love the puppet wedding story so much its so funny. Especially as someone who is engaged and heard lots of wedding horror stories. If you are hosting an event where people can give that choice of if they want to go there will be people that won't want to go for whatever reason. I think they're good having that puppet wedding on their own and having something for their family later.

[@LightsOfLisbon]

Yay! Haven’t yet listened to this one so I’m not sure whether you are already doing this, but I would appreciate so much if you would go through the comments of the AITA posts after you have given your opinion, because there can be so much more context and other good takes that can affect your opinion on the issue. 😊

[@Bentendo]

I've thought about this, or doing an episode where we look at updates/comments, but I think it's more fun to consider the original post as it was posted (and give our opinion without being swayed by the comments). And when people add edits/updates, I think they are often just defending themselves from the comments so in a way the original post is a better representation of OP.

[@LightsOfLisbon]

@@Bentendo I understand your perspective, but for example the post ”AITA for telling my husband to quit waking me up” has very valid comments about how this is intentional abuse (sleep deprivation) and the OP’s comments are in line of that, she describes that her husband is completely lucid and functioning when asking the question. So your light-hearted take about this feels a bit uneasy, for me at least.

[@jessicawalton4690]

@@LightsOfLisbon i think that was maybe just not the best one to use, I don’t think they would want to get into discussing if someone was abused or not

[@Deen_Over_Dunya_Love]

@@Bentendo So just make your opinions and THEN look at the comments. Don't see the problem lol.

[@LightsOfLisbon]

@@jessicawalton4690 Yes I agree, but because they didn’t read the comments they did not realise that this post was probably not a good choice for the podcast entirely. I remember feeling the same way about a few other posts in the past also in this podcast.

[@jadedjadejay]

I feel like cristine always misses the point of these. I’m only at the 2nd post in, listening to her excuse for the guy waking up his wife, and I’m like, “here we go again 🙄” Ben, on the other hand, always gets it and nails it with his comments 👍🏻

[@primadonna2312]

I know, right? She always wants to defend people who are clearly assholes.

[@Zizalaonfire]

Seems like cris has never been in a very abusive relationship. And she looks for the good in people. So the thought of someone deliberately waking you up for nothing doesnt even cross her mind, cuz its so ridiculous. Shes such a sweetie, its great she has Ben, who is such a great man

[@perfectblueeeee]

@@Zizalaonfire i agree with this, Christine is very trusting. Trusting to a fault, and assumes the best of everyone. It’s very endearing, but I feel like she’s never been in a emotionally abusive or manipulative relationship

[@clairewillow6475]

My dad woke me up once to start arguing with me. Woke me right out of deep sleep. Narcissists be like that 😒

[@gabrielagarland3372]

I mean but that's just her opinion/way of thinking. She's never claimed to be a great judge of character, the whole point is to just have fun with the Reddit posts and talk about them.

[@hijinxnails633]

I was married on a beautiful beach and during the ceremony people rode past on horseback- they stayed to watch the ceremony and give us congratulations- it was wonderful- people should relax and enjoy the moment sometimes.

[@mayareads708]

🤣 i dont think ive laughed this much on a podcast ever. The banana that splits was my fav 🤣🤣🤣