Am I Wrong For Telling My Late Wife's Family She Cheated And Tarnishing Her Name r/Relationships

[@hi_stranger9156]

Ex-SIL knew his late wife was cheating on him. Yet, she was her sister's biggest supporter and shamed OP for not loving or grieving her sister enough. Talk about being a hypocrite.

[@aalokshah8655]

to her credit, seems like she thought he knew and admitted she was wrong. I think she had trouble moving on and projected those issues on him, which isn’t right, but people are flawed.

[@flavialm1]

Is that thing where people become saints once they die. She misses her sister, and for her, she was the best person in the world. Is really hard seeing everyone moving on when you lose someone, because it is like the world is forgetting about them, like they never existed except inside you, because your pain won't let you move on or forget. And if you do, you feel excruciating guilt

[@Mewse1203]

I could not have said that better myself. Serious hypocrite

[@JuanRodriguez-tf7fh]

​@@aalokshah8655*Wahmen are flawed Fixed it 4 U

[@RJLiams]

​@@aalokshah8655 She only admitted she was wrong AFTER the talk with her brother. If your "flaws" are to actively hurt people, then you're just a bad person.

[@flaminhotyoshi7403]

The fact that Anna’s sister knew about her cheating makes her look even more despicable when she berated OP for “not loving her”

[@rene280195]

Anna and her sister are both trashy people.

[@AraAra6367]

Seems like she was under the impression that Anna stopped her affairs and began to work towards the marriage. Considering a year had passed between that and her death, SIL might’ve actually been within reason to believe that her sister came clean and OP had forgiven his wife for it. Unfortunately we just don’t have the details to corroborate or debunk it.

[@whitneybennett4857]

@@AraAra6367 But whether she was under that impression or not, she was still being nasty and extremely hypocritical regardless. So even if she thought OP knew and had forgiven her, those circumstances still wouldn't paint her in a hardly better light.

[@yeighseph1976]

Anna did not, I repeat, DID NOT love you. Kink or not, cheating on you is not love.

[@chickensandwich8808]

No I do think she loved him. But she didn't respect him. Respect is stronger than love because it a choice.

[@carrissa8867]

I guess it depends on your definition of love. Love is a social construct so well that doesn't fit your definition of love it fits his

[@Sherwoody]

I wonder if her cheating, not being able to satisfy her, made him feel inadequate. He might have blamed himself for her actions.

[@recycledapathy7411]

@@chickensandwich8808 I don't think you can have love - at least not the kind that keeps a relationship from ending - without respect or trust. Without those it's just a crush.

[@Zantetsu13]

@@chickensandwich8808 She respected him but not their marriage? Do you listen to yourself?

[@sergeipohkerova7211]

Dying doesn't absolve someone of the damage and harm they've done to others in life. Oh, so they're dead, so now so they need to be canonized and if you were their victim in life you need to be silent out of respect to people whose feelings might get hurt if you tell the truth? Gaslighting is bad, and that includes gaslighting yourself.

[@maniaclaugh]

There's a saying in my language that translates to 'speak good of the dead or don't speak of them at all'. I think this should only apply when their actions can't negatively affect people anymore. It's pointless to bring up great grandma's sharp remarks from 60 years ago, but in this case her actions keep him from living his life, so her vileness must be talked about

[@crichtonbruce4329]

Now that we know SIL knew about the cheating, I wonder if the mother knew or suspected as well. This might explain the over the top efforts to, as you say, canonize her and protect the family from scandal.

[@waitwhat1029]

​@@maniaclaugh...American...probably English...saying is "Don't speak ill of the dead". Same thing. It keeps things way darker than "grandma's sharp comments" hidden. It needs to go.

[@tazhienunurbusinezz1703]

Meh. My youngest speaks of her late grandfather as disrespectfully as possible & I approve wholeheartedly. He was a alcoholic chomo who ruined the lives of both his children (boy & girl). The girl also became a raging alcoholic with short periods of sobriety. During 1 of those periods she asked for our youngest to spend the night with my niece who was 6 months younger. We agreed but she disrespected our boundaries & invited him to meet our daughter & spend the night. He tried accosting her in the middle of the night. Luckily my late husband was former military & taught her hand to hand. She smoked him at age 13. He spent hours on the floor crying not able to get up until his daughter woke up to hear him. Well deserved imo. Not everyone deserves to be remembered fondly.

[@waitwhat1029]

@@tazhienunurbusinezz1703 ...well said.

[@Veteransmoker]

"Ana loved me, she wasn't a monster." And yet, she still cheated on you. That's not love.

[@recycledapathy7411]

And the only reason he found out was that it started burning when he peed, don't forget that. Yeah, she loved him so much that she infected him with something that could make him sterile (most STIs can).

[@VSorceress]

A person cheating on you can still love their partner. The problem is that their selfishness is greater than their love, and their respect is less than their love for their partner

[@Norinia]

@@recycledapathy7411That’s the biggest betrayal. If it was just kink, maybe it could be blamed on insanity, but she *infected him with an STD.* She didn’t care about him, she only cared about herself. Ana was a creep, and it’s good she can’t torment OP anymore.

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

​@@VSorceress"God I love her so much, but I can resist the fury of these fists!" - Your logic

[@Rukiah1]

​@@VSorceress if she didn't care enough to prevent him from contracting something that had the potential of risking his health/life that's a level of selfishness that no longer includes love for him.

[@xxKuroKajixx]

Cant wrap my head around her loving op. If she loved him, why cheat? A kink isnt a excuse.

[@sampa2nyc]

Exactly. Also, it looks like they were headed for divorce even if he didn't find out that she cheated.

[@thebigbadwolfe_27]

By and large, most people have a fairy tale concept of love. But love is a weird animal and no two people experience love the same way. Was she a shitty wife and selfish person, without a doubt. But she may still have loved him in her own sick version of the emotion. Add to that, us humans are REALLY good a justifying our selfishness to ourselves, and you have one truely fucked up situation.

[@chickensandwich8808]

@thebigbadwolfe_27 correct! What we could say is that she repeatedly disrespected the marriage and OP. Respect, imo, is stronger than love because you can't choose who you love, but you can choose to respect/disrespect them. And she repeatedly chose to disrespect. If she loved him, it wasn't a healthy love. In the end, her love trapped and hurt her husband

[@autumn557]

Loved him enough to not make him uncomfortable with her kink and push him maybe?

[@MrBrachiatingApe]

Successful marriages don't necessarily require love, but they effing die fast, hard, and bad without respect and trust.

[@madambutterfly1997]

She didn’t love you enough to be faithful the love you claim she had for you will always be under scrutiny.

[@whitneybennett4857]

Yes, say this louder for the people in the back. SOMEONE WHO LOVES YOU WILL NOT CHEAT ON YOU!!! If your relationship is that bad but you care enough to save it, you have a long, honest conversation about it and/or seek professional help. Or you leave the relationship/marriage so you can legitimately obtain what you want or need elsewhere that you're not currently getting.

[@loganjoh1]

Yeah when he was saying that, I was thinking, "she let a kink dictate her faithfulness or lack there of in this relationship to the point she gave you an STD so excuse people for not buying her love for you"

[@vamp567]

My wife cheated on me because I wouldn’t do one kink. But she totally loved me. Right OP. Right.

[@KyrieChii]

FR. We are judged by what we do. She lied & cheated for _3 years._ There are cases where 'not being a good partner' make you a particularly selfish, dishonest... dare I say.. _'bad'_ person. This is one of those.

[@Mario-SunshineGalaxy64]

I like how his ex-BIL is going to become his BIL again, he’s a stand up guy, shame the ex-SIL couldn’t be the same way. I think the situation was handled as maturely as it could have been to maintain the relationships of everyone. Also, to anyone that’s super curious what this kink was that was so important to Ana that she'd cheat continuously for years on someone she "loved", it was pegging.

[@RainbowRandomFilms]

where did you see it was pegging, did OP comment? holy shit she needed to peg men that badly she had to cheat wtf ://

[@faeriefire78]

Thank you! I was wondering. I guessed it was scat play or something, lol.

[@bhutehole]

Yeah thats my favorite part

[@katie6731]

Thank you for sharing the information. I'd guessed something _way_ off base.

[@aaronwilber2377]

How did you find out what her kink was

[@Atlas-gm7fc]

As someone who's heavily into the kink scene, fuck Anna, don't get into relationships with someone who hates your kink if it's that important to you ffs. KINK IS NOT AN EXCUSE

[@FrostyBob99]

Exactly!

[@chickensandwich8808]

@@Atlas-gm7fc amen

[@anyjen]

Yup. I have a kink that my ex didn't share. Guess what I did? I never tried to pressure him into joining me in that kink, and never tried to seek someone out to get off with. I kept it to my fantasies only. We were together for nearly five years, and the topic never even came up after the first couple of times we talked about what we liked and didn't like in the bedroom.

[@Logitah]

I actually find it lovely to have something JUST for myself! ❤

[@Yinsashi7981]

Story 2: Bruh, you don’t have to have a partner to go on a date night v.v I think OP has the right idea on how to spend the prize and hope she and her kids have a great “date” night!

[@thefallennero5265]

Story 1: OP's late wife told her sister about the affair a year before she passed and wanted to come clean to OP and work on their marriage? Was she really planning on coming clean to OP given the fact that the affair went on for 3 years and there were 2 other guys besides the one she had the long affair with?

[@darknezfire]

Probably, the sister found out some fishy behavior, and that's why ana "confessed" (I don't think she came clean about the 3 years affair or the 3 guys) It's still pretty hypocritical of the sister to get mad at OP for "no lovingly Ana enough to move on so quickly "

[@daisyp1670]

This man deserves happiness. He lost his wife twice: when she died, and when he confirmed she was a cheater. He had to suffer this trauma and pain in silence for years. He healed on his own and moved on all by himself. He should have had her family’s support, but instead they were upset he was over her too fast? Bull s h i t. I need everyone to leave him the fuck alone to be happy with his new wife. I hope he has a wonderful, long, happy marriage.

[@johnbradbury8610]

He would have had happiness if he wasn't so concerned with protecting the image of his 304 wife

[@dianajohnson7337]

I never have understood the whole "don't speak ill of the dead" thing. It doesn't matter if the person is alive or dead their actions have repercussions that can last, sometimes even for generations. Now I am going to have to look up how/where that saying started.

[@msf2399]

Probably has to do with not upsetting the already grieving.

[@jimmygarza8896]

From what I understand, it's at least partly to do with the fact that the dead can't defend themselves. If there's any mitigating circumstances, which there aren't in this case, or if the accusation(s) are fake, which they aren't in this case, the dead can't point it out.

[@ladydamiana6841]

Those are the nowadays excuses. I'm guessing it started as a superstition to not bring down ghosts and curses from the dead down upon you and yours.

[@funkijote]

Like most rules of “civility” it has the convenient outcome for the situationally powerful or those who do damage, of protecting them from the wrath of the weak, or those they’ve damaged. Civility is a high social virtue but becomes a cancer when held higher than justice.

[@purplefood1]

@@ladydamiana6841 It's more to do with the dead not being able to defend themselves.

[@DragonflyandTheWolf]

My uncle moved on with his current wife less than a year after his girlfriend passed away from cancer. I really liked his girlfriend. She made an effort to entertain us kids at family events while the other adults just talked to each other. She would bring board games and play with us. I do not like his current wife. She never stops talking and she monopolizes my time to talk to me when I just want to catch up with my sister who I don't see that often because we live so far away from each other. I have NEVER once talked about my uncle's deceased girlfriend in her presence. I have never shamed my uncle for moving on. I have never treated my uncle's wife unkindly even though I don't like her. She has been a member of the family for over ten years now, has stuck by my uncle, stepped in as a grandmother to his grandkids and supported his daughter when her ex husband drove their family into poverty. She is his family and she is mine, even if I try to avoid her, lol.

[@errantwinds-up8uu]

I'm really proud of OP1, Laura, Thomas, and Monica. They're all class acts and I'm glad they can keep a relationship going together

[@pasalking7760]

Speaking of iconic reddit stories y'all remember the "art room"?

[@KJ-sp9jq]

or the couch

[@charityquill4965]

My fav is either jorts the cat or this other one which is prolly more niche, the airport cheese guy. Also there's the CBAT guy too, that story spawned so many memes haha

[@huinismith]

​@@charityquill4965 Thanks, now I'll be playing it for hours in my head, lol.

[@ginathecookie]

​@@charityquill4965oh gosh CBAT guy xD

[@PardonSylver]

We hadn't had a good art room story in a while. Which... Is for the best now that I said it 😂

[@ParrotMan01276]

He doesn't owe her anything, not the family of her EX. It's better to refer to her that way instead, despite being a widower.

[@fear_bees]

"I'm not talking shit: I'm saying what she did in the order she did it, and you were, rightfully, horrified"

[@alexnightray3204]

Omar is a GEM. Omar is a GOLD-STANDARD Friend! :D

[@suitov]

You don't even need to bring up the infidelity because that's not the real problem. The problem is that OP is trying to move on and is being dragged backwards every time her grieving family trots him out to perform grief with them. He would have been entirely reasonable for saying that to his BIL, followed by something like "they and I are clearly at different stages of our grief, this isn't healthy for me and I'm going to have to step back from it for my own recovery". That said, there was nothing to say he had to keep on keeping secrets for the dead. Totally reasonable to tell the family, and he did it the right way by taking to BIL without the mother and sister there. And turned out the sister was being hypocritical, too. I can't fully blame her because if I lost my younger brother I'd lay into anyone I didn't feel had the right to speak poorly of him... but that woman just needs a lot of help and time to grieve, and to cut back on the frequent worship ceremonies they hold. Doing that while she knew her sister wasn't perfect is going to cause cognitive dissonance, which isn't good for you.

[@jrod1591]

“How can me and OP turn our relationship around.” “Well you can start by not cheating on your husband.”

[@TsukiKageTora]

People who cheat on their partner and don’t say a thing about are the most wild type of people. They raise their own house alongside their partner’s health. 1:18 Typical cheaters always suspect their partners to cheat when they are the ones to cheat.

[@duketha5286]

She is not a good person good people do not cheat on their partners

[@KadeStringer2.0]

You could be a good person and do a shitty thing sometimes.

[@sweetrolldealer]

​@@KadeStringer2.0those are mutually exclusive

[@captainfluffypaws7068]

​@@KadeStringer2.0 Usually good people who do shitty things would actually regret those things. Sounds to me like the wife wasn't

[@Bleg94]

@@KadeStringer2.0 if so you would confess INSTANTLY out of guilt and then try to make it up and be better, she didn't the fact that she cheated for 3 years makes it clear she doesn't have a conscience or anything even remotely resembling that

[@kristenhlady4079]

18:35 Shush up jealousy monster !!! Everyone knows your mad because you didn't win. Op that's not a friend or a nice person. A friend is supposed to be happy with you over you winning something

[@xelectrix]

Right!? A date night with the kids sounds so sweet. Also, as a commentor mentioned, dates don't have to be remantic. I love going on friend dates. It's nice one on one time that you can't get with group hangs.

[@DiZoSoMom]

THIS! That was 100% my first thought. This girl is not a friend. She can’t be happy for her for one little thing like this?! Wouldn’t surprise me if she was one of the cheating partners of OP’s husband. OP deserves that prize.

[@nateperry191]

Also like.... have people never heard of a mom date??? Like wth let that mom be a great mom

[@alosialee]

This lmao. I like the first commenter response. "Date night" doesn't have to mean romantic date night. I have platonic and mom kid dates all the time lmao. My daughter and I especially go on small dates together to places she wants to visit like the book Cafe local to us or to small diners and restaurants. The term "date" can have so many definitions and meanings. Like play dates for small kids. Parent/kid dates for quality time between an individual parent and an individual kid. Family date nights where everyone goes and enjoys something together. Romantic dates between partners/lovers. Platonic dates between friends. And risqué dates between a payer and a payee (I lived in a motel for a while when I was beyond poor and got asked multiple times if I "date" so that's how I know that last one lmao). What they provided, the gift card to a restaurant, a fire pit and comfy blankets, marshmallows and hot cocoa.. sounds like the perfect date night between kids and parents. It's not like they were giving out strawberries, whipped cream, and edible underware.

[@MizMorgue1]

💯 agreed!!

[@elski5067]

Story 1: defended his wife to reddit , defended her memory by not telling her family. Op really needs a therapy before he gets back into another relationship.

[@whitneybennett4857]

He's also being too lenient (imo) with the SIL. He said it'll be ok as long as she doesn't bother him anymore but she ALREADY HAS messed with his life. She KNEW her sister was cheating on him for an entire year prior to her death and then had the audacity to accuse him of not being a loyal partner when he found someone else.

[@katarinatibai8396]

​@@whitneybennett4857She is also a cheater.

[@johnbradbury8610]

​@@whitneybennett4857OP is a people pleaser. I bet his wife walked all over him

[@SaruCharmed]

I disagree. He sounds really well adjusted and capable of nuanced understanding of difficult situations, but I do think everyone can benefit from therapy.

[@lina9535]

Some people can move on faster than others, and that's okay. Just like we grieve in different ways, how long we need to move on is different too

[@Ace_AloneWolf]

The Order of Omar…. I love it!❤

[@dzauthor]

Thanks for sharing your personal thoughts, Mark! It makes the listen so much better than just reading without any of your fun comments sprinkled in

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 2 the organizers didn't ask OP's relationship status before or after winning. They clearly care less about "demographic" than the friend. Sounds like the friend need to STFU and get some business of her own

[@recycledapathy7411]

I think the friend was trying to angle toward getting OP to donate her prize - to the friend. Funny thing is, nothing in the prize is specific to a couple on a date. Single people who aren't interested in dating eat meals, like flowers, use candles and blankets, and drink hot chocolate too. Like, if the prize had been a jumbo sized box of condoms, I could see the friend's point.

[@GeminiKN7]

Last Story: Themed raffles dont have "demographics", lmao. We did class raffle bundles as fundraisers in elementary school, and there would usually be a "movie night" or "chocolate lover's" bundle, but thats the thing about these raffles: they're themed to get people excited about them and drum up engagement! If someone with a chocolate allergy won the chocolate lover bundle that wouldn't be them "stealing the opportunity" from someone else, because I can guarantee just like OP did they would share the contents of their prize with the people they cared about. Petty me wonders if the judgemental friend has a raffle ticket sitting at the bottom of her purse.... 🤔

[@wraith176]

Don’t forget CBAT that’s a great Reddit legend. Lol

[@trippinggauntlet4520]

Mark, you missed the Art Room in your classics list. 😊

[@jacearmor5274]

S1: NTA. Anna did not love OP! OP is under no obligation to keep this false image of Anna up. It's even worse that Anna's sister knew she was cheating on OP multiple times and yet berated OP for moving on to someone who actually treats him right.

[@imajinallthepurple]

16:20 Omg, not Mrs. Bucket of Reddit! She still haunts my thoughts, though mostly because of OP's hilarious writing. 😂👍

[@marvellousme]

Best writing for me was the heritage wall- despite the sad ending

[@opalglass8101]

And if anyone wonders what a "Mrs. Bucket" is - Mrs. Bucket is a character from a British show from the 80's - 90's who always insisted that her last name was pronounced "boquet" - like a bunch of flowers. She also had her nose in everyone's business to the point it was hilarious how everyone tries to placate her and not offend her while trying to take back some control. It's a comedy. I only know about this show because Dad is from real life Middle Earth 😉

[@lilworkerb]

Oo! You should do a legends of Reddit compilation!

[@onurkneezb]

Story 1: OP is the TA for defending a cheater, even if she is dead. ETA 11:00 Cheating on OP for years does indeed make her a terrible person. Doormats are gonna doormat...

[@j.a.y.j.a.y.1107]

"The high altitude turned me gay for a day" guy could be a new Reddit legend

[@cmsxcb]

I know. I've cancelled my climbing trip just in case 🙂

[@recycledapathy7411]

The comments on that one were beautiful. I particularly liked the one where a gay commenter said that he went scuba diving and it didn't make him straight, lol

[@darknezfire]

Which story is that one?

[@cmsxcb]

@@darknezfire kzbin.info/www/bejne/bGGxZquqm62Ba7c&lc=UgzxhAJeaojIEMsSZkJ4AaABAg.AA95iTFoMW6AAAOOH86fso

[@recycledapathy7411]

@@darknezfire It's one that just got posted on reddit a couple of days ago. If you google "AITA for not believing my boyfriend" it should come up as one of the first results I saw the story yesterday because my daughter asked me if I had read the story about the guy who claimed that Utah made him temporarily gay. I was like, "whut?" so I looked it up and we howled laughing at the comments. "Blame it on the a-a-a-a-altitude" was her favorite

[@dwilcox7706]

You're never wrong for telling whoever you want to that your ex cheated. Unless you cheated first..... oh she's dead? ... uh case by case basis.

[@peregreena9046]

"Don't speak ill of the dead" doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about their flaws. It means that you should do so with respect and without hate and malice.

[@madambutterfly1997]

You already know my testimony, and I will do this song and dance for the rest of eternity. Loyalty is the bare minimum a very, very, very low bar and if you don’t have enough basic human decency to do that much you don’t have the right or privilege to be in a relationship. I don’t care how damaged you are or what commitment issues you have.

[@bonniehalf-elven]

Hearing "neener neener" read with a British accent is hilarious.

[@CodenameTurtle]

Story 2's friend isn't a friend if she can't even be happy OP won something so small (after going through a rough time) and wanted it for herself. Like she implied she doesn't deserve it. Yikes!

[@AnthonyJ.Murrell]

The notion of a flawless marriage or relationship is a myth. There's no set formula for success; what works for one couple may not work for another. Yet, I've discovered that there's always a way forward, even in the most challenging times. Five years ago, my wife and I encountered significant hurdles in our marriage that nearly led to divorce. Despite the adversity, we managed to weather the storm and emerge from it with our bond renewed and revitalised

[@LymanB.Crosby]

There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things

[@AnthonyJ.Murrell]

Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is shelly renee white

[@LymanB.Crosby]

This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks.

[@AnthonyJ.Murrell]

You wont regret it

[@apriltaylor6677]

Story 2, Mark's "oh P*ss off will ya" made me spit cola over my computer screen laughing 😁

[@TwiggyHetfield27]

Story 1: "You're not allowed to move on. We want you to remain miserable because that's the only way to prove you loved her" God screw these people. After Update: Holy shit man, pick a lane! "She did love me! She was a terrible wife & cheated on me but she wasn't a terrible person!" Yes she was!! Having a kink doesn't justify cheating. Of course the sister knew, she was the one pushing more then the mom about OP not saying more about Ana... Story 2: LMFAO! She's just mad she didn't win. It's like going to a tricky tray & just putting your tickets in... whatever! And winning the "couples bubble bath basket" Do I have a bf? No. But it's got candles, bath bombs, bubble bath gel, etc. I like those things!! You don't NEED to be part of a couple to enjoy those things!! Screw that friend, she's jealous!

[@threeducks157]

Op keeps insisting she loved him, things is all cheaters are narcissistic, they can’t love anyone but them selfs so no, she didn’t, she simply like having him she more than likely didn’t love him.

[@KadeStringer2.0]

Not completely true

[@threeducks157]

@@KadeStringer2.0 yea i generalized too much.

[@-mokerly-5984]

Please do not spread misinformation. It doesn't take a personality disorder to be a selfish jerk.

[@AndyyWithAY]

I mean the obvious answer is to distance yourself. IDK why he's bringing his new fiance around these people. Four years being long enough is relative. A lot of people gain sainthood in death. I doubt telling the mom/ sister about the infidelity will resolve anything.

[@elski5067]

Very weird guy

[@ZomBeeQueeen]

She’s their SIl 😂 literally their family member

[@elski5067]

@@ZomBeeQueeen umhhh how?

[@carolyneskin9275]

@@elski5067Anna’s brother is married to the sister of OPs fiancee

[@ZomBeeQueeen]

@@elski5067 he explained his brother introduced him to his SIL.

[@LoveK1]

“She loves me. She loves me. She loved me.” OP was coping so hard that it was cringy.

[@Akemi.24-45]

Heeello, Mark, Poppy, and Waffle gang! ♥️🤗

[@kali3731]

hellooo to all ❤

[@loganjoh1]

Oh yeah Omar was such a walking green flag I hope he is having a great life

[@SugarFreeZaddy]

Maybe it's just me but... why is OP still in his cheating ex's family's life? Why not stop entertaining the family functions and gatherings and start being around his new SO's family?

[@KatieBoyd-e5f]

10 dollars for a florist? What are you going to get? A single rose?

[@joeyjojojrshabadoo7462]

Maybe they're from a country with a different exchange rate?

[@KatieBoyd-e5f]

She talks about the bologna fest being a Midwest thing, so it sounds very American to me.

[@somplex0]

Hearing Ogtha made me flinch so hard. I forgot about that

[@chickensandwich8808]

It's easy to bash Anna. And the comments are going to do that in spades. So instead, let me just say... Thomas, you're a real one. He stood by OP and didn't assume he was lying but just wanted verification for his own sake. And, his wife too! Both are true friends. I actually remember the Omar story from a dofferent channel. He wasnt the OP but man he was a legend. What a chad.

[@savannahmae3679]

For Christ's sake, this is why lieing doesn't do any good. I'm telling you if I was that MIL and I found out that my family was lying to me about my dead child for years, i would be more angry at then than my cheating child. It doesn't accomplish anything

[@KarmaTheDragon]

story 2 sounds more the universe decided OP n kids needed a lil cheering up i think op was the perfect winner :)

[@lina9535]

Story 1: Cheaters don't get like amnesty just because they aren't around anymore. Sharing who they really were is just being truthful

[@lina9535]

"She loved me" Oh, she did, did she? Because someone that cheats generally doesn't love you. And someone who loves you doesn't generally cheat on you

[@lina9535]

People liked Bundy too, and he was far from a good person

[@RobertCampsall]

"The Order of Omar" and the other's you mentioned, but the one that sticks out the most is the OP who decided to build and art studio for his "best friend". I see it referenced every once in a while - it truly was a mythical - or maybe cautionary? - tale.

[@Swnsasy]

_THE LEGENDS_ *JUST DO IT FOR DAN* 😂😂😂

[@Yeahno-ey3rb]

Story 1: OP only had to address the concept of moving on, that it's time and that OP was/is ready to step away from the past and live in the present. Tell the mom and sister that you are moving on and that OP will no longer be attending functions having to do with the dead wife.

[@Sparrow_J_Dreamer]

Story 2: based off the title I thought it was gonna be something like an adult entered a drawing for kids and somehow won. Not that. I don't think OP was TA

[@dm9078]

It is time no it is way past time for OP to grow a spine. These people at his cheating late life are his past. The new woman is his future. He needs to be protecting and nurturing that future.NTA! Cheaters are terrible people no matter how many times he lies to himself about it! I’m trying to wrap my head around the fact that this guy would go to an annual memorial service for his cheating X where her last affair partner attended. I can’t imagine loving anyone’s family enough that I would put myself through that level of self humiliation. But we’re all different.

[@theseawriter]

I’m in 3D printing class. I have to invent or modify something. This will be fun, not at all frustrating. Edit: I’m making a glasses 👓 holder for the car

[@tatkkyo9911]

Kool you use blender, 3d builder, fusion 360, onshape or somthing else? You printing in fdm or resin?

[@theseawriter]

@@tatkkyo9911 We use Fusion360 - students get it free. We don’t use resin, but I don’t know what kind of fillament we use. We don’t print most things we design, but we can for extra credit.

[@KyrieChii]

Don't forget the 'Legend of the Art Room', Mark! That was my first experience with Reddit Legends, & Holy cow. I've seen it referenced dozens of times on other stories.

[@TsukiKageTora]

15:49 You forgot to add these to the Legends of Reddit: CBAP and Olga the Cockroach Wife

[@nanidafaq7626]

don't forget about the couch story or the art room. those two are classics, and markee will not let anyone forget about the damn couch

[@AraAra6367]

“She loved me” and “she was a terrible wife that cheated on me for years” are not two things that can coexist. OP might be moving on from Anna’s memory but he’s always been under her thumb.

[@rene280195]

S1: Ana was trash, human trash, she cheated for the entire relationship because she was sexually unsatisfied and then turn around and put her insecurities of being caught on OP, making her a jealous cheater. I´m glad Op can say good things about her late wife but she was trash and she was a bad person.

[@jeannebuttons5301]

I love the animation of you holding the pupper

[@catsncrows]

Prize story Some of the best dates I went on were ones I took myself on after my ex husband unglued himself in bad southern baptist childhood and ran tf off. Op's friend can shut it

[@karendaniel620]

Mark, bologna is pronounced baloney. In the seventies, sandwich meat company had a whole jingle.

[@Basil-q6u]

“She was a terrible wife” “She wasn’t a terrible person” “She was a terrible partner” “She loved me” “She cheated on me for years” Yeah no, Anna was a terrible person, partner, and did not love OP. I hope OP can find peace and heal from what happened to him, and finds happiness in his new relationship. If you cheat on your partner: Fuck you.

[@veronicaferris6633]

I reckon you need to make a Best stories playlist including: Bucket lady Pearcing Patty EA and the Italian restaurant Etc I have started downloading these videos so that anytime I’m having a bad day I can listen to them ❤😂

[@dawnstone4424]

First story. I wouldn’t be saying anything. It’s not going to help and you’ll still look bad, maybe worse. I would distance myself from the family. …The update though. SMH. People are amazing.

[@Mewse1203]

Not even Ogtha can handle CBAT.

[@kaitlynhall2112]

I loved mark talking about how the legends of Reddit invade your brain and kind of activate like a winter soldier. Example…My city was cutting tree branches all around my neighborhood this week and I found myself chanting “Tree law! Tree law! Tree law!”

[@MGP2210]

5:35 - 5:44 Agreed. Those people need (grief) therapy and OP should have put his foot down ages ago. OP let those surviving loved ones keep him down.

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

Mark, bologna is the Italian spelling for a deli meat, aka baloney. It's a cured meat, usually pork or beef, sometimes made with poultry for those who want lower fat content. Personally, I love it, especially fried! I'd love to attend a bolognafest!

[@chuuninlyndon]

Story 1: i hope he didn't invite exSIL to the wedding

[@mithril1584]

Mrs. Bucket, that's a throwback lol.

[@thefilmcritic3409]

Omar!! The roommate story lives 😂😂

[@paigehansen8944]

20:32 hey Mark! I’m midwestern American, and bologna is pronounced “balloney” (: (Buh-lone-knee)

[@browniewin4121]

1) Sorry for OP to learn his wife was a cheat, and enough so to give him an STD. I can understand her family wanting to speak about their deceased loved one, but they keep giving OP a bad time about his lack of grief and moving on with his life is not ok. First I think he should tell them how they are behaving and things they are saying needs to stop immediately and if they do not respect that, then it's time to reveal the truth. OP needs to not let her family interfere with his life and new relationship. Maybe just start by speaking with the older brother and see if he has any ideas for how to handle this in a way that everyone can be ok going forward. After update: I'm glad OP found help from Reddit. It's nice to hear OP's wife was not a horrible person, just a very bad wife. It's good OP talked to her brother and his wife. It's good the brother offered to handle his family on OP's behalf. OMG, SIL knew she was cheating and was still going along with the, 'she was perfect' scenario with ing the family and giving OP a hard time. I wish for OP and his new partner much happiness going forward. (nope not wrong to have things bring other storied to mind) 2) WTH?! If there is a drawing and OP won, there is no reason to not keep the prizes and shame on anyone for giving OP crap about it. NTA.That is no friend but an envious, obnoxious AH.

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

Story 1: Ex-Sil stwting quiet about the cheating and not holding her sister accountable wqs already crappy. But how she's been treating OP? Nah, she's not sorry, she's saving face.

[@lorrainemontagnon1537]

Heloooooo, Mark, and of course , little Poppy! Just enjoying my morning coffee ☕️. So let's sit back waffle gang and enjoy listening to our favorite narrator! Much love all! ❤❤❤❤

[@Kinsfire]

Last one - friend was angry SHE didn't win ...

[@jaimejones3177]

2: It's your prize... use it any way you want! I remember when my sister and I were kids.. shes was around 7 or 8 so I was 10 or 11. We went to this street fair type thing with drawings for the kids. We entered and my sister's name was drawn first then a boy won the second drawing. There were two prizes.. first kid got first choice. It was a skateboard or a keyboard (like a piano). My sister took the skateboard and the boy was FURIOUS 😂 He kept telling her to put it back and take the keyboard because the skateboard was for boys! She just laughed and walked over to me and my dad with her brand new skateboard. Honestly...I think the event planners picked those in case there was a boy and a girl, assuming the girl wouldn't wanted a skateboard...but she won and she got to choose. The rules are the rules babe! Enjoy those marshmallows and hot cocoa with the kids 😉❤

[@dizzysdoings]

That last story, recently I went to a fund raising dinner. The theme was Western, and had a door prize for the best dressed. Many people were wearing shirts, hats and boots, myself included. But, I was the only one wearing chaps as well as (English) spurs. Instead of a pocketbook, I took a saddle bag and threw some tools and supplies for fixing a fence. I also had a lasso. Needless to say, I won. The prize? A $50 gift certificate to get my nails done. I've never had my nails done. I would have rather won the fire pit, marshmallows, etc. 😂

[@aileencastaneda3724]

You forgot the infamous “Lotion Man!” I think that’s the name lol

[@boneymeroney2674]

The prizes sound amazing. ❤

[@godzillakungfu]

I always enjoy the “hold on let me explain” excuses and how a majority of the time it’s actually makes the person worse. Naw, if I loved someone and couldn’t give up my kink, I damn sure wouldn’t give them a STI to prove my “love.”

[@katiemcwrath]

I would watch a compilation of the great hits of Reddit.

[@berylryder9709]

15:54 clearly I don’t listen to enough Reddit stories, because I don’t know those references. The only ones I can think of offhand are parasite-man, the art room(barely), and c-bat.

[@tineve2002]

They should have added Reddit the legend of "Do It For Dan."😂😂😂

[@marshawargo7238]

When my kids were little & husband would rather hang out with his drinking buddies on new years eve, the kids & I had our own 🎉party! I bought a bunch of party stuff with hors d'oeuvres and appetizers, the whole 9 yards😂! Funny that he decided that we were having more fun than he was, & ended up staying home after a couple of those parties😂... A date is what you make of it & who you want to be with❤!!!

[@RoseKoneko]

Ahem, Mark. I think you meant Mrs “Bouquet”, it’s French. (God I loved that show. It added further amusement to watching my grandmother laugh at how awful she was while being her American counterpart in the flesh.)

[@lighthouse-witch]

"Yeah she cheated on me, *but* she still loved me, really." Dude, my man, she didn't even think to bring it up with you the idea of maybe having some sort of open relationship, she literally didn't care enough about you (regardless of herself) to be careful and not to bring an STD into the equation, *and* she was jealous with you, constantly asking to check your phone to keep check on you while herself deleting most evidence and being incredibly careful with her mementos of *her* cheating on you. She wasn't as stupid or reckless or anything like that as you might want to believe, she knew exactly what she was doing, or she wouldn't have been that careful or so guilty that she started projecting hard on you. However, I will agree that that doesn't necessarily make her a terrible person... To *other people than you*.

[@daisyp1670]

Hello cheeky waffles! 😏🧇

[@ebagentj]

Story 2: This went the opposite way from what I expected. I thought it was going to be an adult who entered a contest aimed at kids but wanted the prize because they're a collector or something, which I am not sure I would have disagreed with, either. But a prize for "partners" going to having a good time with kids? Nah, definitely NTA.