*Turns off KZbin.* “At least they didn’t list any of the bad ones.” -Stan Pines.
@LaCabraAsada5 ай бұрын
He forgot about llamascide smh
@UnionThorax5 ай бұрын
@@LaCabraAsadato be fair, he knew too much
@moathalmaghlouth82625 ай бұрын
I love this reference
@Blix_5 ай бұрын
@@UnionThoraxgotta love the gravity falls community
@陈杨-k9i4 ай бұрын
No, he would go to KZbin headquarters and delete the video, find the guys up address and offer him a stan Funko pop for 100$
@Kyleplaysgames5675 ай бұрын
Everyone in Gravity Falls is so dumb from constantly having their memories erased from the society of the blind eye. Stan regularly takes advantage of their stupidity.
@Jos-3494 ай бұрын
Thats actually a good idea! Just asking for a friend,hypotheticaly,where could one get a memory gun?
@Nidorss3 ай бұрын
and the fact that the cops from gravity falls are dumb tho
@caindain21796 ай бұрын
To be honest, Stanley sacrificing his memories to kill bill and to save should give him a pardon 😂❤
@Sonic2024freedomera6 ай бұрын
having Amnesia...does not give you pardons
@caindain21796 ай бұрын
@@Sonic2024freedomera No I mean- He saved the world from a being INFINITELY worse than him
@Sonic2024freedomera5 ай бұрын
@@caindain2179 oh yeah
@enturkatali5 ай бұрын
Ford appeared publicly in kids' birthday and Stan was refered as Stanley so I guess he was pardoned.
@ShishlKebab5 ай бұрын
I agree.
@BuzryHaproMandalorianHunter6 ай бұрын
That assault on Gideon was actually self defense because Gideon threatened him with termites.
@callmevbuck40545 ай бұрын
Those weren’t bees - they were termites - and I’m pretty confident that bees can’t chew through wood.
@TylerGT20065 ай бұрын
Those assault charges for there should be dropped in my opinion. (I’m not a lawyer so expect me to be wrong here)
@danielramos63255 ай бұрын
I know right
@littlemacisunderrated4125 ай бұрын
Assault on a minor always puts the adult at fault, regardless of who started it
@julius99435 ай бұрын
understandable, i find rolling gideon while he was incapacitated while in stan's property wouldn't be assault neither. its the home owner's right to tell anyone to get out.
@Real_Moon-Moon6 ай бұрын
2:47 That was actually reasonable self defense imo. Gideon was threatening to destroy his house, he was simply protecting himself.
@Real_Moon-Moon6 ай бұрын
3:06 Not really assault, Gideon literally broke into his house and he was kicking him back out.
@brokcat74186 ай бұрын
I just wanted to say that
@erikbulux47935 ай бұрын
Plus he threatened to let flies loose that are capable of harming objects and people and he said "With you inside" which implies that the flies were gonna consume him alongside the shack.
@danielramos63255 ай бұрын
I know right
@josephreinerth91525 ай бұрын
Ya, Stan wasn't even laying a finger on Gideon, and besides Gideon was trespassing.
@LettuceMan_Real6 ай бұрын
5:36 I love how POOL JAIL becomes capitalized after another pool jail sentence.
@TheTimbs_5 ай бұрын
Pool solitary confinement
@Mayo_Nayoo5 ай бұрын
Pool Confinement
@OctoSplatterson5 ай бұрын
Pool con
@coralroper68765 ай бұрын
…You’re not charging him for the thirty years of identity theft?
@DogManWes27905 ай бұрын
That's what I said!!
@the7jazzys4 ай бұрын
they did
@MelloYelloGtag4 ай бұрын
No they only did a life sentence not a charge @temmiphone
@THE-HORRORCHANNEL_V24 ай бұрын
500th liker
@cinaradam-0524 ай бұрын
Hes the judge dude.
@C.A.M5846 ай бұрын
The guy also had his underage relatives help him with his crimes so he is guilty of criminal exploitations.
@meapyboy123456 ай бұрын
When the cops aren’t around. *Anything’s Legal!* Oh shoot😆3 months later i did not know i got this many likes. Thanks everyone.
@Harrisonm306 ай бұрын
L ol
@josem5885 ай бұрын
Specially if you live in a town in the middle of the oregon forest
@danielramos63255 ай бұрын
Yeah 😂
@reganl83665 ай бұрын
That makes perfect sense
@mikaelcordwell96925 ай бұрын
He'll definitely get a call from the safety inspections after this
@LOVELYLITTLENOBODY4 ай бұрын
I'm surprised child endangerment wasn't listed ONCE, let alone multiple charges for everytime he was charged for wreckless driving with Mabel and Dipper in the car.
@John_The_Eeveechu6 ай бұрын
"Grunkle Stan what did you do?" "What didn't i do?"
@Plushyking-d2c5 ай бұрын
HOT BELGIAN WAFFLES wait I’m alone I can swear for real gasp* SON OF A BI
@Aneptuneling4 ай бұрын
Nothing
@jameslogan83744 ай бұрын
suicide
@Custer_X6 ай бұрын
You missed one from Headhunters from the flashback: Stan said I'll just take em when your not looking. I said I was going to rob ya." I looked up on the wiki and there was 14 wax statues and they costed 20 bucks it showed in the flashback. so altogether he would have to pay 280 bucks and make the wax statues or return them.
@Terra_Egg6 ай бұрын
You know it’s gonna be crazy when the whole video is sentencing one guy
@Imabird34525 ай бұрын
He's a friking GTA carecther
@Sillygoober1045 ай бұрын
He’s probably only counting the crimes he commits on screen
@UpUp-v7z5 ай бұрын
The portal causing supernatural events would be hard, but it would more count as terrorism since it was effecting the whole town and Stan was knowingly putting everyone in possible danger
@UpUp-v7z5 ай бұрын
It would be only one count of terrorism, but it would be the death sentence either way
@KIDSEE_GHOULS6 ай бұрын
0:45 your telling me annoying a child is a crime
@Shapeshifter-of-Names6 ай бұрын
It's Like Harassment
@michaeljonassom6 ай бұрын
It's actually called that legally. It's kinda. Weird to name it that but yeah.
@winxclubcomejointheclub60665 ай бұрын
If annoying a child is a crime all my math teachers are saying bye-bye to freedom for a few centruies
@saralorenzaalvarezromero74395 ай бұрын
Oh and BEING SHIRTLESS IS A CRIME
@Shapeshifter-of-Names5 ай бұрын
@@winxclubcomejointheclub6066 Very Much, Yes, I Sure Hope No Teacher Abuses a Child
@TheGreat_Dutch55 ай бұрын
7:04 How is it animal cruelty when your pet pig to be kidnapped by a big ass bird?
@taytomen17695 ай бұрын
Honestly its gravity falls, he knows better.
@Galaxsiea5 ай бұрын
Bcz he has put him outside
@thatonecheesyguy5 ай бұрын
at worst its animal endangerment, but not outright cruelty
@dylanzlol72935 ай бұрын
Isnt animal neglect illegal?
@Lightning_Fox5 ай бұрын
@@dylanzlol7293 is putting an animal outside neglect? especially after it causes damage when inside
@BraveFrontierRemeberer6 ай бұрын
HOLD UP wouldn't "you put your money in the bag and it mysteriously disappears" count towards tipping and not be a offense since he runs a business?
@masteroox5 ай бұрын
The problem is that he lied it's magical and knowing him he probably had done it for years, it's sure a fraud
@BraveFrontierRemeberer5 ай бұрын
@@masteroox it can obviously be interpreted as a joke they obviously knew they where losing money by putting it in there its more like a tip jar then fraud
@e.m.m.i60545 ай бұрын
@@BraveFrontierRemebereryou are greatly overestimating the iq of the locals in gravity falls
@John_The_Eeveechu5 ай бұрын
@@e.m.m.i6054Especially with all the damage the society of the blind eye has caused
@Beenisweenis5 ай бұрын
@@e.m.m.i6054 The IQ of the locals isnt really important when in court it only matters what the average reasonable person would do/think
@Custer_X6 ай бұрын
You forget the mayor episode where literally at towards the end the news lady talks about all the crimes Stan did like lamlacide and then the TV shows crimes he committed for a spilt second. I thought you were going to talk about all of those crimes.
@Joe257_Art-Gaming-Animations4 ай бұрын
“That llama knew too much.”
@TheDimensionalArtist6 ай бұрын
YOU KNOW IT'S A GOOD ONE WHEN GRUNKLE STAN IS ON TRIAL LOL
@Grunkle_Stanley5 ай бұрын
That judge's hammer thingy makes a good merchandise..
@joaopedroauriemo5 ай бұрын
And that's because this show takes place thirty years after he left his criminal life, imagine how many more crimes he probably comitted
@sylveonchan84606 ай бұрын
9:42 Pretty sure he can get away with just Property Damage. A LOT of property damage
@caramelldansen73365 ай бұрын
I think throwing in assault would be reasonable too, as I imagine a lot of people were hurt
@sylveonchan84605 ай бұрын
@@caramelldansen7336 How?
@caramelldansen73365 ай бұрын
@@sylveonchan8460Well we see multiple instances of people getting high up in the air because of gravitational anomalies (11:09) and then falling down. There's definitely a lot of bruises and broken bones, if not outright deaths (unfortunate fall that resulted in a broken neck, or someone falling off a cliff)
@YourLocalMairaaboo5 ай бұрын
I'd go with Domestic Terrorism instead of Witchcraft, but keep the sentence.
@Boywithafishingrod5 ай бұрын
4:46 "I don't even know how to sentence this" was the best line so far
@samueljrhlorgbe60916 ай бұрын
To be fair The assault on Gideon was justified because he wanted to make him small Plus that was the easy way
@DanabHD23385 ай бұрын
The fact that Stanley gets charged with both federal and pool jail, I cant!
@eliwalter77912 ай бұрын
13:41 "Bills existence is against the law" is just so funny to me 😭
@paperclipps5515 ай бұрын
"theres no cops in the forest, we take this to our graves."
@DDboi-47375 ай бұрын
This guy needs to be pardoned for getting his memory erased to defeat Bill because Bill is worse than him
@rain_bowfis85115 ай бұрын
A death sentence and a life sentence is wild
@DonutMadeInBlender5 ай бұрын
Be be fair the people are willingly putting the money in the bag even though he told them it won’t come back
@Rhysisgreat5 ай бұрын
Going by your logic, Walt Disney would be in prison for not having real mice at his theme park
@jamiebigpoo5 ай бұрын
😂
@trixsterwolfproductions44886 ай бұрын
3:03 for context Stan was actually evicting Gideon because he was unwanted in his house, nad he was having some kinda mental breakdown
@BluegrinchhhАй бұрын
He was being tickled
@trixsterwolfproductions4488Ай бұрын
@@Bluegrinchhh perhaps he was
@Starvingmonkie5 ай бұрын
It’s funny how gullible the side characters are
@Chips_and_Gears5 ай бұрын
"ZOMBIES HAVE NO RIGHTS. BYE BYE" Not a sentence i was expecting to read today
@iulianaturtureanu78715 ай бұрын
Ford's gonna be so mad when he finds out what Stanley did with his name
@S1LLY_PUFFR13S_L0V3R6 ай бұрын
Next: If Bill Cipher was charged for his crimes
@Average_PlayerFromRBX5 ай бұрын
i mean everything he had done isnt really in a episode and there is probably even more heinous crimes he had done but we really cant tell
@AlivepersonWasTaken5 ай бұрын
7345776764377342766534757843378534845776443766443 years for destroying almost 2 dimensions
@randomnessltd5 ай бұрын
Causing the apocalypse: ???
@Gandolf_Hitler5 ай бұрын
Omnicide, destroying a dimension.
@Amorphous.I5 ай бұрын
Hi bill :D
@MotionMaster1235 ай бұрын
7:32 ZOMBIES HAVE NO RIGHTS bye bye, got me dying 😂
@B1_1_9_7_54 ай бұрын
Dude could have said self defense or hel even defilement ofca corpse but he had to devalue the life of zombies 🧟♂️ 😂
@falconstudios1464 ай бұрын
If you die you'll have no rights
@KadeStringer2.06 ай бұрын
Technically he didn’t assault when it came to Gideon
@Mayo_Nayoo5 ай бұрын
no he Giddy'd his way to legal
@normalhuman98785 ай бұрын
Yeah that is absolutely self defense
@LeonGameVids2417 күн бұрын
But he did say "I wanna take picture's of this"
@salleedstrom91576 ай бұрын
1:51 To be fair. He DID get punished for THAT one.
@z-ro16416 ай бұрын
That bee attack on Gideon was self defense
@Artificer_5 ай бұрын
termites, but yeah
@Black-k9f6 ай бұрын
2:38 he was defending his self and the mystery shack Gideon was threatening him too
@Chill-Ice5 ай бұрын
And these are just the crimes Stan committed in the show, imagine 30x the sentence
@sylph80054 ай бұрын
He was a part of a cartel
@MelonKingdomOfficial5 ай бұрын
“Zombies don’t have rights” “Bye bye” XD
@Sonic.EXE-5 ай бұрын
YAY 14 MINUTES OF STANLEY’S CRIMES😊😀(also don’t forget that he’s banned in 32 states so it’s a lot more than that💀)
@casino233 ай бұрын
0:45 since when is annoying a child a crime?!
@firststateparanormal3602 ай бұрын
I’d be in prison for 10 years!😂😂😂😂
@dlionthesurvivor96902 ай бұрын
Personally, I would have count that as harassment
@LalnunTluanga-ov2ox7 сағат бұрын
If that is actually a crime i would have a death sentence
@Goatman_Gamer5 ай бұрын
I like how Death and Life are both considered punishments.
@zrexy79s116 ай бұрын
Surprised nobody's done a video covering Stan. He's perfect for this stuff.
@Chisszaru6 ай бұрын
Grunkle Stan gotta relax with the traffic crimes he keeps commiting. Gow he's even allowed to keep his drivers licence is just plain cruel to literally everyone and everything around him
@motheroftheuniverse61405 ай бұрын
He’s also got cataracts and is basically legally blind
@Artificer_5 ай бұрын
something tells me he doesn’t even have a license anymore, he just keeps driving and nobody stops him because the cops on Gravity Falls are almost entirely useless
@mdsowjwkdjskwkdmdksdodjdns12465 ай бұрын
2:53 I wouldn't Consider since Gideon broke stan's mirror Which could usually get you kicked out, AND Gideon Morrows was to mutate Stan.
@paulandkylee62526 ай бұрын
2:50: should be self defense because Gideon was threatening to destroy the house so Grunkle Stan had a reason to assault Gideon
@Larry_the_Snowman5 ай бұрын
And now he has to face his crimes without knowing what the heck just happened.
@EngineTheRobot5 ай бұрын
one of the funniest things about this, is that for majority of these crimes, he's doing them all under FORD's identity.
@RookelCookel5 ай бұрын
3:06 Gideon was TECHNICALLY entering private property Stan kicked him out So- -3 Months 9:47 It isn’t the dark ages anymore, so I revoke the death sentence 13:56 He saved the world by sacrificing himself, I think, personally, he shall be pardoned
@Yem3n35 ай бұрын
i think 1-2 years of prison will be suitable for him, its not too harsh, but still putting him in prison.
@M4x_P0w3r4 ай бұрын
Would the sentence from the gravity anomalies caused by the portal be considered crimes against humanity? After all, the journal did warn him that misusing the portal could cause the end of the world
@deuriul35615 ай бұрын
7:32 Zombies don't, but beating up corpses is illegal (Yes, it can be seen as a self defence, but in reality nobody will believe him)
@RealAvent3 ай бұрын
1:36 "Every year these yahoos dress up as Gideon
@TheBlackAbyss13 ай бұрын
Thank You for actually putting the punishment each crime adds on screen!!! This is my biggest pet peeve with Mousait's content!
@evelynadams57945 ай бұрын
“Zombies have no rights” I’m dying
@diamondmemer97545 ай бұрын
The entirety of gravity falls actually takes place over the course of 20 years, they've just been in prison that long
@constructivecriticism62035 ай бұрын
To be fair, it’s not clear if all of those guns are illegal, but given Stan’s criminal record he wouldn’t be able to buy a gun lol
@sanscomic42265 ай бұрын
Gotta love how we have:minor property damage and then just straight up money loundering.
@JosephMaddoxJoyce5 ай бұрын
4:49 There’s multiple laws being broken here. 1. Owning a threatened species. Grizzly bears (which I assume this is) are considered a the species in the state of Oregon. 2. Purchasing a threatened species. 3. Two counts of child endangerment. This bear is both unfit to operate a vehicle and should not be around children. 4. He decided to take the leash off the bear. Even if you somehow were allowed to own a grizzly bear, there is no way you would ever be allowed to bring it out in public without a leash. 5. It appears that there is no mirror on the left side of Stan’s car. 6. Whatever laws the bear breaks while driving. Stan is the only adult in the car and this is presumably his car to. Considering he is the owner of this bear, he would probably be the one who pays the bears speeding tickets. 7. Stan said he would “teach” this bear to drive. I doubt this bear has an Oregon state learners permit. 8. In the state of Oregon, you need a WCO permit to have a wild animal in your vehicle. Despite breaking all these laws, he did make the bear wear a seatbelt.
@CCG15thelocalpieceofpaper156 ай бұрын
Even though Grunkle Stan is a criminal, he still loves and cares for his family, and I like that about him. It shows that just because you commit crimes and do bad things doesn't mean you're an evil person. I think that's a very sweet message that isn't really told very often. Usually when a person is bad and commits horrible crimes, they're just even monsters and wanted to be bad people but Stan is different. Stan only wanted to be loved by his family. He only became this way as an effort to prove he isn't a failure just cause he isn't smart, but he also saved his brother and the entire town + his family, so I'd say he's a pretty good guy, intention wise at least
@saucequest315 ай бұрын
2:44 wouldn't this technically be self defense since Gideon threatened to do the same? 3:14 wouldn't this be assualt 3:18 wouldn't this be property damage 5:42 wouldn't that be property damage too 11:57 this isn't involuntary manslaughter due to Stanford not dying, just being trapped in a different dimension.
@user-zq6rb2nx7k5 ай бұрын
involutarily imprisonment?
@saucequest315 ай бұрын
@@user-zq6rb2nx7k I guess so
@masteroox5 ай бұрын
10:40 Hate to be that guy, but it should be Identity Fraud X33, because he was banned from 32 states so he changed identity 32 times + taking Stanford's name
@AnimatedCourtroom5 ай бұрын
Would result in the same punishment, but you are right haha
@dylanzlol72935 ай бұрын
@@AnimatedCourtroomit would be multiple life sentences, not one
@joanntilbury84232 ай бұрын
0:17 would stan and the kids go to prison? Or would just stan
@stoneforest263921 сағат бұрын
I think just Stan because he made the kids do it.
@-boondoggle-61345 ай бұрын
…and these are just the crimes we’ve *seen/heard* he’s committed. There’s likely so many others we don’t know of.
@animekiller2.0115 ай бұрын
2:39 to be fair Gideon was on Stan's property and threatened to smash that jar that could damage his whole house and him. So I'd say Stan was in the right 👍
@rosegray40615 ай бұрын
Not counting the counterfeit, destruction of public property, countless counts of child engagement, etc. You went easy on him
@arrowpirate90115 ай бұрын
"Zombies have no rights" 🤣🤣
@dorkworksrandomvideos67763 ай бұрын
Destroying Bill, a danger to reality, should give Stanley a pardon. I mean, his heart is in the right place, he sacrificed his memories for his family AND the world!
@tomyang86886 ай бұрын
8:57 "I eat kids" 💀💀💀💀💀💀
@OctoSplatterson5 ай бұрын
I *ea*t kids you mean
@lechatdu1365 ай бұрын
Same
@Eacapple4 ай бұрын
@@lechatdu136 what???
@Murloxb4 ай бұрын
He should be pardoned of his crimes after killing bill. like, he literally saved the entire universe
@GRIBLYGROBLY5 ай бұрын
"BURN the child..." has to be my favorite line from grunkle stan.
@IkeEdits31233 ай бұрын
"Annoying a child" 💀
@ivanhardy-Birt11246 ай бұрын
I'm pretty sure he'd get an assault charge for throwing a smoke bomb at the female clerk at the Halloween store
@leakierysch52245 ай бұрын
Imagine the judge watching this video, sentenced grunkle stan to death in trial and his lawyer makes him watch gravity falls before making a decision.
@spiritsofwolves5 ай бұрын
Jeez his sentence is even longer than his current age
@solizrael4 ай бұрын
Grunkle Stan has admitted to Tax Fraud on multiple occasions.
@C.A.M5846 ай бұрын
The Mystery Shack is like a freakshow but they are not usually real themselves it's like arts and crafts.
@Tommy-pv1vh5 ай бұрын
That first theft is not theft, just legal tourist attraction operations
@lambda65645 ай бұрын
Don't forget about the first degree llamacide. That Llama knew too much.
@smoldragon3395 ай бұрын
12:02 Does this really count as manslaughter, though, since Stanford didn't die? He just got trapped in another dimension.
@MazdaMiataMX-5 ай бұрын
Considering exactly that, it probably would've been considered manslaughter if there had been an investigation.
@smoldragon3395 ай бұрын
@@MazdaMiataMX- It probably would have been considered manslaughter, since the authorities wouldn't know about/believe in an alternate dimension, but it still wouldn't have actually BEEN manslaughter.
@dylanzlol72935 ай бұрын
Im pretty sure that a court of law would either assume that the machine killed Ford, or that stanley endangered ford's life by pushing him into an unknown place.
@Profkol0rado5 ай бұрын
Stan would probably be charged for imprisonment since you know what happened
@Lazyfox55164 ай бұрын
Bill lives there so yeah
@gem_stonezzz4 ай бұрын
he did all this yet still refuses to swear in front of dipper and mabel
@cloudlion16104 ай бұрын
I guess their parents are strict about it
@Potato-BobsBurgersFan5 ай бұрын
Oh forgot the episode where Stan ran for mayor, they list off a bunch of his crimes.
@honeydels4 ай бұрын
this old man really livin his life on x games mode
@blueraccoon10885 ай бұрын
10:25 wait he's alone He can swear real; SON OF A-
@MakenziesCuteLandOfficial5 ай бұрын
(Fast torward)that's him Alright.
@Halfsmashy4 ай бұрын
“As long as there are no cops around anything is legal
@nomelitoarquillano74545 ай бұрын
the part with the killer termites might be justifiable since it's self defense since gideon's a wacko
@LettuceMan_Real5 ай бұрын
you forgot about the scene at the end of the show where he threatens the bus driver to force Waddles on
@official_hood5 ай бұрын
To be honest, Stanley should have all of his crimes removed. HE literally saved everyone, and I mean EVERYONE from the end of the world.
@chadcreeper97774 ай бұрын
You forget about that scene on the bus when they threatened the bus driver to allow waddles on the bus(on of my favorite scenes on the show)
@johnliampham34105 ай бұрын
0:50 it’s not theft they willingly put the money in
@Ninpressions5 ай бұрын
THAT’S WHAT I WAS ABOUT TO COMMENT
@dylanzlol72935 ай бұрын
Maybe they mean that the crime is tricking people into giving him free money?
@Fishwolfcrow5 ай бұрын
@@dylanzlol7293 he does say that it disappears so I think it's logical to assume that you're not getting the money back
@Sleve_McDichael14 ай бұрын
Fraud/Scam
@dylanzlol72934 ай бұрын
@@Fishwolfcrow im pretty sure that the gravity falls city isnt known for being logical, through?
@DrChris15 ай бұрын
Erasure of Bill Cypher & saving the world - Pardon from all charges
@Alemations_OSC5 ай бұрын
I'm sad this guy didn't reference the crimes played on the TV from the episode when Stan becomes the mayor
@SavaMiadzvedzeu5 ай бұрын
Stanley Pines, perhaps, one of the only characters in animation who could be rightfully justified for, if not all, then for the majority of his crimes. He was trying to survive without any education, money or food when he was kicked out of the house. Then, when he met Stanford and lost him in the portal, he was trying to get him back and keep the Mystery Shack house alive for 30 years (s2e12, "A Tale of Two Stans"). And, after all, he decided to sacrifice himself in order do destroy the demon from outer dimension (s2e20 finale).
@Normal_is_boring256 ай бұрын
I love that Stan gets his own video. 😂😂😂
@kristamu063 ай бұрын
I’ll tell you a good story. It’s called,Grunkle stunkle gets tried at court
@veethesillymonkeyx35 ай бұрын
he straight up said in one episode he regularly commits tax fraud
@protectorofwilfred14645 ай бұрын
Don’t forget the episode where Stan runs for Mayor, and wins, but is deemed unfit for the large list of crimes, all of which they then list
@KirbLePoyoMaster5 ай бұрын
Sentence: Death + Life Stan just beat the system...
@4Bakers5 ай бұрын
there's that one episode where the news accused him of 1st degree thermometer theft, pug trafficking, snacks evasion, pickpocketing, woodpecker baiting, impersonating a dentist, general indecency, golf cart theft, and bingo fraud (and a meta joke about how this joke is still going but I don't count that)