Anti-Style Type: Worn Out Wendy

[@meheretoday6968]

When my kids were young, when I was raising them on my own as a deserted wife, I was worn out Wendy.. I had no choice. It was either clothes or food for the kids. I chose food for the kids. .. it taught me not to judge people by the clothes they wear.

[@sairafranco4079]

What you’re saying at 4:40 👏🏼 I think a lot of young women get the idea that focusing on your looks is shallow and “who are you to judge” but it’s more about how you value yourself and how you want to be perceived by others. Humans are not solitary creatures, we sacrifice small pieces of ourselves to remain part of the group. One of which I think is the comfort of wearing whatever we like; maintaining (at least) a decent appearance is not only a sign of dignity but also I think a signal of respect for those within the space you share. A kind of unspoken agreement that you won’t bombard the other person with the untamed parts of yourself which is essentially what showing up in a pitstained pajama represents. The style message is relevant for men as well and I think it’s sorely needed in these undefined(?) times, it’s not a message many young people hear.

[@belindacrisp7078]

l wonder whether the tendency to hoard clothing isn't somehow related to growing up with little. l know l am far wealthier than my parents were when l was young and l am not wealthy. l am frightened of having my 'things' taken off me. l think about how l might need stuff again one day and might not be able to afford it.

[@darinaangelova2882]

Belinda Crisp Me 2 girl, mee too...

[@actuallyterry]

Same

[@annarehbinder7540]

This was so spot on, and I loved the compassion which made it a lot easier to swallow. I’m a wendy at home , not outside and ive spent the last year getting rid of clothes and stuff . Some of it valuble ,some not- but which ive been saving in case i got kids ( a whole heap inherited) and since I had to stop Work because I got sick I really really got stuck . I would buy nice stuff for outside the home and not use it at home or not buy stuff which i really liked because ive already got ten vases ( which i dont actually like that much ) so its not only clothes its everything - living in the dregs of somebody elses old life . And ive had enough . I want to keep what makes me happy and let the rest go.... to let in me! As a person just me! Thank you Very much for this , it made me realise conciously what ive been doing and what i need to get Done!

[@jk3253]

The production quality of your videos has really improved since I first started following your channel! Also, your new hairstyle is great!

[@LaurenMessiah]

Thanks so much for the compliment :) Appreciate it. XO

[@remmirath42]

I used to be a Worn Out Wendy and I still don't have a lot of money to spend on clothes. I wear worn out things whenever I'm at home and nobody sees me. That makes my nice clothes last longer because they don't get worn and washed as often.

[@Canadian97467]

Start finding people who have even less than you to give it forward. Uless your box of hand-me-downs is really crap and shoud be turned into rags instead.

[@remmirath42]

I totally agree! I recently donated three IKEA bags full of still okay clothes to a place where they are given to actually poor people like homeless or refugees. But when I say "worn out", I mean stretched out and/or torn things that only I would still wear because they have sentimental value to me. They are basically rags, but I refuse to accept that ;-)

[@vidlevjidle2994]

I recently binned 15 kg of clothes because of an airline baggage limit (well, I could have paid but then I thought wth I don't even like most of the stuff). The airport binmen spotted me and took all of it so I was happy I could help :)

[@bascoaful]

you could check thrift stores for things :) all the best xx

[@lesfa3313]

For all moms whom endure being worn out Wendys for us children! My mom still has that mentality but her has gotten better over the year. Her style still a bit frumpy but she's trying to match and coordinate now. ❤️🙂

[@vacant588]

Les Fa n

[@sylviamann5090]

This is a great series. If people can't see that it's trying to help, not mock, then the point is lost in them.Also you're really rocking the new hair cut.

[@pollybrown3204]

Love you videos! I struggle with what to wear at home after work. I go from professional to homeless looking because I just need comfort. Could you do a video on this or direct me to one? Thank you so much!

[@suzanne2976]

Professional to homeless. Oh! I get that! Might want to invest in some comfortable jeans, leggings, and some cute comfortable tops (and if you're wearing with leggings, that they cover your bottom) to wear at home and if you have to run out to the store, you don't have to change clothes. Or, if you are not planning to go out, purchase some "lounge" pants.

[@jenniferrose6770]

You can buy cute comfortable over sized T-shirt’s and sweatshirts. Velour is back in style and it never really went out of style but it’s very popular now. You can buy velour sweat pants, T-shirt’s, and sweatshirts as well. They make great leggings in all different materials. Check out my Instagram page. I have examples on how to be comfortable and dressed up along with awesome lounging around clothes and how to dress up a t-shirt. My Instagram page is @jenni_willi

[@NataliaDiazJackson]

You do such important work. Thank you for all of your insight!!

[@karenpetersen8144]

My husband is “Worn Out Walter”! LOL... I have to get him into a dressing room in the store and take his clothes from him in order to get him to try on and buy new clothes! Pitiful!

[@LaurenMessiah]

Worn Out Walter!! I love it!!! LOL

[@PortraitofAsha]

Mine too!

[@jayashiaco9476]

What advice can you give to those of us who are conscious of the fact that fast fashion is suffocating our planet and that mindless consumerism is systemically encouraged by industry? Just wondering how those people can feel good about spending hard earned money on unsustainable fashion.

[@GreenGorgeousness]

JayAsh Iaco my advice is don't! Thrift, consignment shops etc. learn sewing. That's what I do.

[@jayashiaco9476]

GreenGorgeousness Yes. I agree. And I do. :)

[@duct_tapeheart6484]

JayAsh Iaco THRIFT STORES!!! CONSIGNMENT SHOPS!!! That's such an easy answer. You can be stylish and conscious about our environment... Just look for good quality and design! Honestly, the only luxury designer items I have were thrifted. Who would know unless I told them?

[@KarenNAB]

JayAsh Iaco maybe don’t buy into fast fashion and buy pieces you can see lasting you for years to come. Thrifting is cool, so long as you’re buying well kept items.

[@Im2blond]

Check videos from Daria Andronescu with her wonder wardrobe system! It's perfect

[@SmidBeach]

I don't know if you've identified this anti-style type yet, but some of my acquaintances should be classified as Pissed Off Pollys - they just need to wear something that will hold the chip on their shoulders. (Enjoying this series!)

[@LaurenMessiah]

OMG Pissed Off Polly!! Amazing. LOL.

[@tfloyd6651]

SmidBeach Oh yes! The ones, who wear the "I will walk all over you shoes!"

[@kseniaswampland6667]

But worn out clothes are so comfy! Soft and almost blending into the skin! An old pair of jeans is priceless, new ones don’t feel that good.

[@duct_tapeheart6484]

I grew up treating my clothes like whatever. Also, in my family, cheap was best. Since I've learned to dress for myself, I realize that clothes are an investment and less is more. Sure, I could spend $60 at Forever 21 or wholesale Chinese retailers online and get a bag of items, BUT those clothes don't last well. The colors fade, they shrink, and aren't labor conscious of the people creating them! Instead, I LOVE Goodwill, Salvation Army, Church Thrift Stores, Yard Sales, etc. I got a black wool Celine skirt for FREE from a church clothes closet for women. My favorite fringed tan suede crossbody biker bag was $50 secondhand. I get compliments on it every single day! Also, shoes are a total investment. I own 7 pair and all of them are higher quality than the 70+ $10 stilettos I used to buy at Charlotte Russe and Rainbow for the club every week... more comfortable too!

[@jenniferrose6770]

I love these Anti-Style Series!!!

[@elf9064]

OMG, I clicked this just to see the differences in style and started thinking "Huh this is how I used to dress", and then you said "Worn Out Wendys probably grew up poor" and I laughed. That's exactly why I wore such old and ill fitting clothes for a while. I purchased a whole new style set this year and have never felt so awesome.

[@tiffanygoodman7967]

I'm flying to LA tomorrow, I'm looking forward to shopping and browsing around the styles. I grew up with minimal clothing options, I still shop at thrift stores because occasionally I'll find a good piece for cheap. The one thing I invest my money in are shoes and bags, I'm planning to get rid of a lot of clothing when I get back from LA and revamp my style.

[@sahondraniaina6214]

I love your video. You are the best. I love watching and listen for the tips. Thank you very much

[@etucker0818]

Your haircut is so chic Lauren. Nice video topic.

[@LaurenMessiah]

thanks, girl!

[@MultiSkysthelimit]

I don't get it,if you are broke you still can look great go to Walmart,the TJX stores.and the thrift shop,and sometimes those that escape poverty have survivors guilt.My sister made 70.000 a year and she looked/looks like a shade cropper.

[@suzanne2976]

My mom grew up really poor- her mom was a single mom (when it was soooo not okay), and she was supporting not only her 2 kids, but her own mother and sister. They would "recycle" their shirts by replacing dated collars and sleeves. My mom said that you don't have to dress like a bum if you're poor. Take good care of what you have (i.e. change into "play clothes" when you get home from school/work, and re-purpose.

[@najaritfelix2815]

my gramma was like this, " poor does not mean dirty or disheveled, if you have two dresses you wear one while you wash the other and take care of your clothes, don't wear you rdress clothes to play around, etc" :P It's good advice.

[@lizabean723]

opinion on distressed clothing? (just a piece or two, not the whole wardrobe)

[@marshawielemaker2869]

You are so right! It's sad and funny at the same time. Can't wait for the next anti style! 👍❤💋

[@jamesbriggs5740]

I have no money to buy any clothes. And I tend to wear crappy clothes at home. Like somebody else said I dress up for other people. Kathy B.

[@amikrenzel5788]

Oh dear you got me, no pit stains but I do keep things past their prime. I need purge but it is hard because I live in two states and have lots of clothes packed away. I will have to purge a little at a time.......yep I did grow up with little but not poor, nope had European parents. Love your beautiful lace blouse.

[@jenniferrose6770]

I wish you showed more examples and pictures in thee Anti-Style Series.

[@zuzahicks2913]

I noticed that I wear worn out things when I'm by myself or on vacation/even when I go out and it just tells me I dress up for other people. Sure, you want to be comfortable at home but I want to dress, look and feel good for myself, not for others!

[@Wildchile]

Love your videos!

[@mayahedgehog2326]

love your outfit!

[@LaurenMessiah]

Thank you!

[@kary3949]

Love These Videos

[@Elemiriel]

I appreciate the multiple angle camera work, but I think it may be confusing people because you are switching angles in the middle of thoughts or gestures. Maybe go back and forth a bit less and use natural pauses in the audio track to double check that you are switching at the pauses in thought.

[@lesliecarnes8775]

Love your look in this video. Lovely, feminine and classic. You inspire me so Lauren! Worn out Wendy needs to stop it now. YUCK!

[@larimarhenriquez778]

Am I first? Love the hair💗👌🏽

[@LaurenMessiah]

thank you :)

[@feathery_cloud]

Lookin super stylish w your short do!

[@susanbuckley4153]

I live in the country and see a lot of worn out Wendy’s.. I love to look pretty and I get nice compliments.. really makes me feel good about myself :)

[@lestranged]

Basically everyone in their 70s and 80s is like this- people who grew up during the Great Depression. Both my parents were like this (now both passed away). Even when they both had good paying jobs they wanted to still wear clothes until they were threadbare.

[@rowanwax]

I was a Worn out Wendy... but still am in some parts of my closet... XD

[@susieroo9743]

I went to a conference last weekend and one of the speakers was a Dated Debbie. Even the hair was an eighties short wedge. I felt bad.

[@autumnarcher]

The moment when you realize you're a Worn Out Wendy...

[@vidlevjidle2994]

Okay, these are slightly uncomfortable to watch, there is something to it I guess

[@creatrixZBD]

Vidle v jidle an astute observation. Thumbs up for looking beneath the triggers 🌈

[@rbersani1]

That's so funny. It's me sometimes. :)

[@withyoctopus]

Roberta Bersani Same. I just don't care.

[@perfumaphilia3246]

Some of these clothes aren't worn out, but supposed to have holes in them. Not that that makes the look any better..

[@MAZE254]

👌am here.

[@wendykelley7925]

I feel I should say something...

[@charlotteroberts3763]

Guilty!

[@beeshopspink]

‘Style types’ ‘should not aspire to’ ……I’m out. This is very negative and reductive, judgemental. As you say, not a good look. Why do we need these negative labels about people?

[@exploitedfight8081]

So you could only find examples of white women wearing old clothes right?

[@withyoctopus]

Men don't care. I have the best husband of them all and he doesn't care what I wear. Same at my job. I got it through education and hard work. No need for new clothes, except If I want them. I thought this would be funny but it's quite boring.

[@OfWavesAndWinds]

It's not 'trashed', it's 'de-constructed". Very IN, lol.