Are You Being Groomed? Recognizing the Signs of Coercive Control

[@jadegreen1554]

It’s unfortunate that when adults are groomed, and even teenagers who are still not adults are told “you should have known better” “you went along with it” “how could you agree to go along with things you’re not supposed to do?” It’s so unfortunate when adults are groomed and they’re told only children are groomed and like something is wrong with the adult who is groomed.

[@CallieSorensen]

Thank you so much for sharing this...

[@theologytherapist]

Grooming has some serious parallels with religious trauma -- so important to know about this and learn how to recognize it.

[@thebubblychickdoesunboxings]

I'm 39 and a guy who is almost 60 tried to groom me. He met me when I was almost 38, and we became friends. The day after we met, he told me that he liked me and wanted to be in a relationship with me. I told him that I wasn't interested in him like that, and I just wanted to be friends. He said that he accepted that, but he would also act creepy. There were times where he would tell me how beautiful, sweet, and loving I am and how happy it makes him to see me, and he would give me gifts that I never asked for. So, showing him that I didn't want a relationship with him didn't help, telling him that I didn't want to be with him didn't help, so my last resort was telling him that I wanted to end the friendship because the attention he gave me was making me uncomfortable. So I told him in a text message and then I blocked his number so he couldn't text me back.

[@ChasDawnMusic]

Oh my gosh, I can not even believe how much this parralled to a situation I was in. I completely understand what you went through. Even the age gap is almost identical.

[@sneadaleighson]

Ik it's late, but I had the same situation. However, my ex-male friend decided after me telling him NUMEROUS TIMES that I wasn't interested in nothing more, he decided to take the liberty in telling anyone with an ear that we were in a relationship which was a FUCKING LIE. I swear I haven't been that livid in a long time. That sealed the coffin for me in that he's dead to me. Oh I forgot, cue the audacity. So this mfer had the nerve to call me immature bc I wasn't interested in him like that. How tf am I immature when he couldn't handle rejection? To this day I'm lost. Sorry for the rant, but that shit infuriated me smfh.

[@Lagger-HD]

My father told me "you should have known better" which sealed the deal on our relationship. They gave me a phone, allowed me to talk to her in private... It's not rocket science, one neglectful one groomer. I got a great hand 👌. That's sort of how grooming works dad, you don't know better because.... Ya know, grooming? Not worth my conscious energy to help them reconcile how they let me down. It was pathetic

[@jadegreen1554]

I’m sorry this happened to you. Many times people with vulnerabilities like this are exploited.

[@thebubblychickdoesunboxings]

I'm 39 and a guy who is almost 60 tried to groom me. He met me when I was almost 38, and we became friends. The day after we met, he told me that he liked me and wanted to be in a relationship with me. I told him that I wasn't interested in him like that, and I just wanted to be friends. He said that he accepted that, but he would also act creepy. There were times where he would tell me how beautiful, sweet, and loving I am and how happy it makes him to see me, and he would give me gifts that I never asked for. So, showing no interest in him didn't help, telling him that I didn't want to be with him didn't help, so my last resort was telling him that I wanted to end the friendship because the attention he gave me was making me uncomfortable. So I told him in a text message that I no longer wanted to be friends with him because the attention he showed me was making me uncomfortable, and then I blocked his number so he couldn't text me back.

[@OolongG952]

Wowwwwww! I’ve dated a groomer before. A lot of this information is very true!

[@sarawelling5271]

Am I? No, because, no, is the only word I seem to remember when someone approaches me.

[@nirmaladrieskens4338]

Great video❤❤❤

[@CallieSorensen]

Thank you so much!

[@caterinadelgalles8783]

Bree Chavez of Moscow. I spoke up and I was ostracized and called crazy.

[@junkettarp8942]

Holy cow........I'm never going out now.

[@enchantedphotography-ip4sw]

Please tell me how to approach a loved one(adult) being groomed Financially and emotionaly but not sexually by someone close without realising it for the past almost 6months... And being totally protective over this person, will not hear anything bad said about the groomer... Please can someone help I would love to talk over email, it is very serious my loved one is on the edge of su*cide atleast once a week and a half... And groomer been doing it with previous people and been doing it many years. Prev people have gone downhill literally

[@analives13]

Can grooming happen i. The workplace?

[@CallieSorensen]

That is a great question! Yes, grooming can absolutely happen in the workplace. It typically involves someone in a position of power slowly manipulating a colleague or subordinate to gain control or exploit them, often for personal, emotional, or even sexual reasons. This process is often subtle, starting with seemingly harmless attention, favors, or compliments, and then escalating over time into inappropriate behaviors or requests. The person being groomed may feel confused or trapped, especially if the groomer holds authority or if there's a fear of retaliation. It's important to recognize the signs of manipulation and set boundaries, as grooming can have serious emotional and professional consequences. If you have any specific questions, feel free to let me know.

[@Manicpixiedreamer]

I’m a therapist and o believe this happened to me by a client. Do you have any insights?

[@CallieSorensen]

That very much could be the case. It can happen in any kind of relationship dynamic. However, I would have to hear the context of the dynamic between you and your client to give an insight. Feel free to share if you would like.

[@elinall5345]

i am confused. grooming or divide and conquer?

[@CallieSorensen]

Thank you for your follow-up question. While grooming and divide and conquer can potentially be used together in certain scenarios, it's essential to approach the topic with care and nuance. In situations where manipulation and exploitation occur, it is not uncommon for perpetrators to employ various strategies to achieve their goals. While grooming primarily focuses on building relationships to manipulate and exploit individuals, divide-and-conquer tactics aim to create division and discord within a group or community. It is important to note that these concepts can exist separately and may not always be used in conjunction. Let me know if you have any other questions.

[@kaniyaheasterling]

Do you charge for an one on one ! I feel like I’m being groomed

[@CallieSorensen]

Yes, I do offer one on one sessions. You can book a one-time session or a package of sessions for a reduced rate. You can e-mail me for information: [e-mail]

[@LelynnsSquirrels]

sounds like a question for JoJo-Siwa (I KNOW I WAS, ALL THRU-OUT MY CHILDHOOD)

[@jacktimothy4551]

it was not your fault

[@dr.strangelove5320]

Now I can't even be nice. Geesh

[@CallieSorensen]

There is a difference between grooming for one’s self serving agendas and truly caring about another persons feelings and needs.

[@dr.strangelove5320]

@@CallieSorensen Thanks! I prefer to be nice. I know mean and nasty. I do unto others as I would have them do to me. I know when to kick ass, figuratively speaking, e.g. when I encounter a full blown Psychopath.

[@TwoSexy4TheseShortsW]

How did you end up taking personal offence to this?

[@ThirdEyePerspective1111]

Found the groomer

[@ChasDawnMusic]

@@ThirdEyePerspective1111 I thought the same thing.

[@Transform108]

Grooming is a big help in our culture. It helps people with a lot of skills and experience help someone that has fewer skills an experience. We groom for leadership - for a role - so much. Pick a different word.