Are You Secure, Anxious or Avoidant in your Relationships? | Attachment Styles | Hannah Witton

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Hannah Witton

Hannah Witton

4 жыл бұрын

Am I secure in my relationship? 💕 Can I finish this quiz before Dan has to use our office? 😂 Let's find out together in this installment of Who Am I in Bed! Catch up on the other videos in this series here: • Who Am I (in bed)? 😉
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Пікірлер: 254
@KarisGorst
@KarisGorst 4 жыл бұрын
"i often worry that people don't really care for me" hannah: disagree me: oh....what's that like? 😅
@AllTheArtsy
@AllTheArtsy 4 жыл бұрын
I do think that that is the sweet spot of a healthy relationship: "I love you. I am committed to you. I am choosing to spend my life with you. But I will not fall apart if you were to ever leave me." That speaks highly to your own self-esteem, reliance and respect. And to the amount of love you are able to give to your partner.
@ojiverdeconfleco
@ojiverdeconfleco 4 жыл бұрын
I've seen some comments asking to elaborate about the avoidant style; I am a Psychologist. Avoidant styles don't show when they are hurting, don't ask for help, are uncomfortable with intimacy in relationships, and have like the stereotypical "walls put up" all the time. They may appear cold, "rational no-touchy-feely" people. Whoever, while they may not show it on the outside, it has been proven that they do hurt emotionally and have pretty elevated cortisol levels (your stress hormone), which is unhealthy in the long term. Like all unsecure styles, they have trouble with solving social/interpersonal problems, and while anxious types have their emotions overwhelmed them, the avoidant suppresses that to not feel. But deep down they feel unloved, unworthy of love, and like the world will never be able to respond to their needs so why bother. Now, keep in mind that in reality most people have a mix of styles with different people and, most importantly, THE STYLE IS NOT RIGID. It can be changed with a close relationship with someone who is secure and can bring that to the table, or with a therapist.
@niamhl6964
@niamhl6964 4 жыл бұрын
Great explanation, a good example of this style is Will from Good Will Hunting. He refuses to delve up any deep issues, resorting to jokes or even getting angry in order to avoid discussing his trauma
@lkimberly2064
@lkimberly2064 4 жыл бұрын
There are 2 "subtypes" if you like- these correspond to what is commonly called stereotypes. The supposedly severely "rational" focuses on mind and either denies or glosses over feelings (either denies them or 'notices them' then passes beyond it as if unimportant) in favor of thoughts and theoretically unemotional reactions while riding like a big boat on the emotions moving beneath them. Seeing everything from a rational view as if nothing else existed. "Rational" can be seen in both male and female. On the other end is the "Casual Emotional", who like the Rational rides on underlying emotions but depends more on reaction in the moment and because feelings are expressed to some degree the variations in emotion on the surface isn't as severe as that of the underlying ocean of feelings. They often see things but like shortsighted ideals often they react in a way that is only in the moment [this is the casual part] and if it should occur again they either dismiss it ("already 'dealt' with it, no need to process it again") or leave it be so they aren't upset by it popping up. The Casual Emotional is more calm but less connected. In a similar way, the supposed Rational is while rational in certain ways more emotional than they like and are upset when someone points it out. On another hand altogether you have those either respond in the moment with either NO EMOTION whatsoever at that point as if entirely rational and recognize emotion only later; Or those who react to emotions right then [happy when things are good, despaired when things are bad, doubtful when it's not "stable" (whatever that means at the moment), and needs outer balance for inner peace] and are the common an emotion rises to a peak and then gradually goes back to not appearing emotional. Whatever the case, if you deny emotions or try to "top" emotions with rationality [a.k.a. mind over matter- seen in both Rational and Casual Emotional] without analyzing the thoughts and feelings as they are (a.k.a. if you yourself don't look at it, this doesn't apply to a purely external "intervention") they become seen to the mind as excess. And this 'excess' is then either rejected or put into an out of mind/doesn't matter placement. It can be compared to a table as if always on your side, it goes with you whatever happens. You focus on or feel things, but the 'excess' is put on this table; either cherished (seperated to be preserved) or not focused on (put on the side, unimportant). Unless both feelings and thoughts are analyzed as they are [not in comparison to something else], whatever is thought or felt becomes 'mysterious' to the one who has those thoughts or feelings. If you don't balance what the thoughts and feelings mean in actual reality [here an external help can assist but it has to be done by the one who has those thoughts or feelings] they can create imbalance. And I do mean in a way that certain "therapies" may or may not be able to help. The mind is no simple thing to organize, it both remains within and can rise above the thoughts and feelings within itself.
@ObsessedWallflower
@ObsessedWallflower 4 жыл бұрын
I feel seen
@ZombieInvader
@ZombieInvader 4 жыл бұрын
Attachment style is largely formed in childhood, but a lot of the questions made me think about how much mental illnesses like depression can affect attachment.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
100%
@maddykeegan1006
@maddykeegan1006 4 жыл бұрын
It also goes the other way. A lot of the time unsecure attachment style is able to predict numerous mental health/illness issues. Last year I taught a class that looked at a case study where the child had an anxious attachment style and the students were able to see how this impacted the client in pretty much all aspects of life.
@emmal5371
@emmal5371 4 жыл бұрын
Oops just wrote a similar comment specifically about BPD but of course other mental illness like anxiety and depression would contribute to the result
@ireallyreallyhategoogle
@ireallyreallyhategoogle 2 жыл бұрын
@@emmal5371 I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality traits, so not enough to qualify for the Disorder, but enough for it to be a problem. I've had anxiety and depression all my life. I'm not sure, but i think the anxiety, depression and loneliness is what made me develop those personality traits.
@andyhartley
@andyhartley 4 жыл бұрын
The questions where they're asking you to choose a specific option is to stop people from choosing random answers without reading any of the questions. It's common when the data is being used for research in some way, and I guess this test might have been developed for use in research and the questions were never removed. If the questions were answered with a different option then they would have been removed from the result set in the research.
@arkavi
@arkavi 4 жыл бұрын
HOW DID YOU COMMENT 15 HOURS AGO?????
@robertmenzies6939
@robertmenzies6939 4 жыл бұрын
We are Patreon’s of Hannah so got the vid a day ago
@andyhartley
@andyhartley 4 жыл бұрын
@@arkavi Also I have a time machine!
@megankidd4671
@megankidd4671 4 жыл бұрын
Andy Hartley I was about to comment this as I learned it in research methods. Here is a thread of a similar case. I cannot remember the specific term in order to prevent bias data like this. www.researchgate.net/post/How_do_you_weed_out_fake_or_spam_respondents_in_Qualtrics_or_other_online_questionnaire_platforms
@maddykeegan1006
@maddykeegan1006 4 жыл бұрын
To add to this, this is also why tests tend to switch the way that they are asked. Like the double negative question Hannah pointed out :)
@CorinneDemyanovich
@CorinneDemyanovich 4 жыл бұрын
Either A) Dan is always sarcastic or B) Dan is not a morning person. But really we all know it's C) all of the above! haha I love Dan's sense of humor!
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
CORRECT it is all of the above
@fridabystrom6689
@fridabystrom6689 4 жыл бұрын
For people who are feeling down due to their result: it can change! A few years ago I was definitely anxiety driven in my relationship, even to the point of losing a relationship. After years of personal development and trust I am now secure in my relationships living happily and safe in my current relationship.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Aw yay!! Absolutely with work it can change 💛💛
@JenniferTijssen
@JenniferTijssen 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this comment... I recently got out of a relationship which didn't work largely due to my anxious-preoccupied attachment style. My heart is still very much broken that I've lost him, but I've been learning a lot about my attachment style and really want to do better in the future. Your comment gives me hope.
@paigedawson9436
@paigedawson9436 4 жыл бұрын
I love the dynamic between you and your partner Dan... you are so DIFFERENT.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
SO DIFFERENT I don't understand why we like each other haha
@paigedawson9436
@paigedawson9436 4 жыл бұрын
Hannah Witton a vídeo idea if ever there was one 😂😭
@francesswain8257
@francesswain8257 4 жыл бұрын
Best video idea since he's the only on you can sit next to
@garethreece
@garethreece 4 жыл бұрын
@Sakina Fletcher Don't be " :( " about it . Taking the piss and sarcasm are a part of all good British relationships (romantic or otherwise) . It's not malicious 👍
@MariaLCirillo
@MariaLCirillo 4 жыл бұрын
The question that told you to put "strongly disagree" is on purpose; it's a control to make sure you're actually reading the questions and not filling it out randomly. It's used commonly in these kinds of studies :) I got my undergrad in psych and master's degree in social work, attachment styles are so important!
@AquaBlueShadow
@AquaBlueShadow 4 жыл бұрын
Attachment theory is my new way of life... In the past year I've been reading about it quite a lot trying to figure my shit out after basically sabotaging every relationship I've ever had... What I learned is that my attachment style varies a lot - taking the test a couple of months apart shows a significant change, my mental state has also shifted during that time. Also I learned my attachment varies in between types of relationships - I'm secure with friends; highly avoidant with my parents; and extremely anxious with romantic partners... Also figured out my avoidance with my parents is connected with emotional wounds, feelings of neglect and disrespect and apparently when my romantic partners evoke similar feelings in me I close up like a clam and push them away - so in stressful situations I have the anxious-avoidant double whammy which is difficult to navigate even for me... let alone a partner. TMI but I am on journey to learn to manage my shit... it's great.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Best of luck on your journey! First step is knowing yourself and looks like you figured that bit out.
@iiiCupCakeiii1
@iiiCupCakeiii1 4 жыл бұрын
Have to say I really enjoy the Dan content we're getting recently
@vazul666
@vazul666 4 жыл бұрын
"If someone tried to get close to me, I would try to keep my distance" right after "I'm afraid someone will want to get too close to me" in times of Corona... it gave me pause :D (especially as it would be a hard disagree normally)
@Chris.tastrophy
@Chris.tastrophy 4 жыл бұрын
I also took the test and got the secure type for everyone. I had a lot of therapy and now I love communicating in different ways. If I have an issue with my father I resolve it in a completely different way than with my boyfriend. Gosh darn I love personality tests.
@dystopian786
@dystopian786 4 жыл бұрын
That thumbnail. For a second I thought overly attached girlfriend had returned.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Hahaha I was trying to reference her in the thumbnail so glad you spotted that!
@ulligruber1344
@ulligruber1344 4 жыл бұрын
Hannah looks like a crazy sex stalker in the thumbnail. Stay safe. 😅
@MathAndComputers
@MathAndComputers 4 жыл бұрын
Best thumbnail I've seen in ages. XD
@yosoysoya7944
@yosoysoya7944 3 жыл бұрын
"I didn't wake up just to be abused!" Even as a morning person, this speaks to me :D. Also, Dan is just generally hilarious, I love it.
@zephyr2266
@zephyr2266 4 жыл бұрын
I'm dismissive, no surprise. Happily single and probably married to my career, I don't need love, I just really want to read more books and sew some clothes and enjoy life.
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Classic dismissive (I don’t know what I’m talking about)
@xzonia1
@xzonia1 4 жыл бұрын
Same
@eev14
@eev14 4 жыл бұрын
Same, I ended a 3 year relationship a couple months ago because i felt we weren't a good fit in the end, and then something traumatic happened to me and my closest friends abandoned me. So now i'm just living the single life, doing my own damn thing, i do feel very free i must say.
@repetitiveaffirmations
@repetitiveaffirmations 4 жыл бұрын
*I think most people go through phases where they step into each style depending on who they are with and what is happening in lives.*
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
aye I think that can be entirely possible!
@LiteratiMuffin
@LiteratiMuffin 4 жыл бұрын
Absolutely true! I think I definitely used to be in the dismissive quadrant and some bad experiences have recently shifted me into the preoccupied quadrant, which is super weird and new for me. But hopefully if a negative experience can change someone for the worse, a positive experience can change someone for the better!
@Sherubiiii
@Sherubiiii 4 жыл бұрын
The excitement when I placed as "Secure" in my relationships
@MainlyHuman
@MainlyHuman 4 жыл бұрын
Hannah's making D&D alignment references, can the next video be speculating about the alignments and classes of a fantasy youtuber D&D party? :D
@matthewrayner6364
@matthewrayner6364 3 жыл бұрын
Dan is such a mood. "I didnt wake up this early to be abused"
@christopherwaller2798
@christopherwaller2798 2 жыл бұрын
I think I'm a mixture of anxious and avoidant. One book I would recommend looking at on this topic is "Polysecure" (even if you're monogamous) because some of the questions definitely felt as though they were measuring secure attachment by seeing if you would form other relationships.
@aimeetrudgian4980
@aimeetrudgian4980 4 жыл бұрын
My results were: General: Fearful-avoidant Mother: Dismissing-avoidant Father: Fearful-avoidant Romantic : Fearful-avoidant
@nimrodgrrrl
@nimrodgrrrl 4 жыл бұрын
You are not alone 💖
@chelled.4622
@chelled.4622 3 жыл бұрын
"Others? There's only you and me in it!" .... the sheer annoyance is priceless
@naturebythetamar8699
@naturebythetamar8699 4 жыл бұрын
Anyone else here with BPD thinking... "maybe I don't wanna take this test.... But I'm curious..." 😂
@SamWest96
@SamWest96 4 жыл бұрын
Hahahaha this
@naturebythetamar8699
@naturebythetamar8699 4 жыл бұрын
I knew I couldn't be the only one!
@Sherubiiii
@Sherubiiii 4 жыл бұрын
The surprise when my borderline ass placed as secure 😂
@nimrodgrrrl
@nimrodgrrrl 4 жыл бұрын
THANK YOU FOR THIS COMMENT
@mschrisfrank2420
@mschrisfrank2420 4 жыл бұрын
I’m a classical example of the anxiously attached who is attracted to the avoidantly attached. My first instinct is always to freak out that my partner is going to leave me.
@majohun3975
@majohun3975 4 жыл бұрын
just did a paper in attachment styles in adopted children and it is in fact highly important for your emotional and social development
@mariaprendeville7456
@mariaprendeville7456 4 жыл бұрын
I literally just wrote web copy for a psychotherapist, and found a paper written by the psychotherapist online and turns out he was adopted! Very interesting, a lot of issues stem from being adopted that even adoptees don't seem to realise themselves :(
@taraknoblock5725
@taraknoblock5725 4 жыл бұрын
I’m adopted and I don’t trust anyone for shit and constantly worry that people secretly are just putting up with me so that’s cool
@admirbarucija2018
@admirbarucija2018 4 жыл бұрын
I’m so excited to watch after my online lecture, I don’t know much about attachment styles!! I hope you’re doing well Hannah 💗
@mokimon5079
@mokimon5079 4 жыл бұрын
33% fearful avoidance, 33% dismissive avoidance, 33% secure, 0% anxious preoccupied. I just. I wasn't ready for that perfectly even split.
@alexhelme853
@alexhelme853 4 жыл бұрын
You can also become securely attached if you’re anxious or avoidant! It generally happens through forming a relationship with someone who is secure, whether that’s a romantic relationship, or a therapist, or a close friend. Also anxious and avoidant types generally are attracted to one another but create incredibly toxic relationships as they both play up each others basic fears: the avoidant people will push the anxious folks away, confirming their fears of being unloved, and the anxious people will cling to the avoidant person and make the avoidant person feel trapped and unsafe and cause them to push away.
@jessmanning9523
@jessmanning9523 4 жыл бұрын
so excited to see you do this video! i love the attachment style concept after learning about it like 5 years ago in college psychology. i always end up coming back to it to help figure out my reaction to relationship issues as i'm anxious attached. my previous relationship was with someone who was avoidant so understanding the problems between that coupling really helped me to learn about myself and move in the right direction for next time!
@tylergent3058
@tylergent3058 4 жыл бұрын
This is pretty cool as it can reflect how people feel about themselves. People who are anxious may struggle to love themselves, where people who are secure can see their own worth. Great video 😝
@WeirdlyAli
@WeirdlyAli 4 жыл бұрын
I am a VERY VERY preoccupied attacher in all relationships. I and very needy (like codependent level needy) but am convinced no one loves me back at all. I legit cried in my room 4.5 hours ago that my whole family actually hate me and only support me because of society's pressure
@twiggledowntown3564
@twiggledowntown3564 4 жыл бұрын
Quizzes like these, always help me understand parts of myself, that I don't always understand fully. Even if I do understand some of it, it's really interesting to see how I work on my relationship with myself through these.
@Enkiaswad
@Enkiaswad 4 жыл бұрын
Unrelated: I really don't like yellow as a color and would NEVER buy it for a clothing item... Yet you Hannah manage to make yellow look really nice and joyful on you. I am fascinated * _ * It suits you and I don't know how.
@joedartonthefenderbass
@joedartonthefenderbass 4 жыл бұрын
I got an ad about attachment styles. Damn the algorithm is good
@nakymatonlapsiN
@nakymatonlapsiN 4 жыл бұрын
me: *goes to take quiz* question one: are you male or female? me: ok i guess not then
@emmynoether9540
@emmynoether9540 4 жыл бұрын
I'm feel sorry for that. There are still so many forms that need to include other options (at least one!).
@_valentina_4111
@_valentina_4111 4 жыл бұрын
That is awful.
@joedartonthefenderbass
@joedartonthefenderbass 4 жыл бұрын
I'm confused. What other option is there?
@aeons6969
@aeons6969 3 жыл бұрын
I was searching for this comment a year later and I relate :(
@elliedimmock
@elliedimmock 4 жыл бұрын
i study a level psychology and we've looking into attachment styles pretty in depth but this was a fun way of revising that and seeing it in a real world context love u :)
@sabs939
@sabs939 4 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the link to the quiz! I got secure as well; and feel very lucky for my circumstances.
@anabelleclark7904
@anabelleclark7904 4 жыл бұрын
The whole 'please choose strongly disagree' is a question to see if you're actually paying attention to the questions, or just randomly choosing. It's like checking that 'i am not a robot' box, except you're saying 'i am not a troll'.
@Julia-gn6yl
@Julia-gn6yl 4 жыл бұрын
the `'n'kay" with the nose rub at the end to Dan made me CRACK,, the shaaaaaade xD loved this video, Hannah! Thank you for sharing, as always! Hope you're keeping safe and healthy! xoxoxo
@aljosathewise
@aljosathewise 4 жыл бұрын
Just finished "Doing it" and there was a new hannah video ❤
@taylacollins764
@taylacollins764 4 жыл бұрын
The whole video was on a time crunch.... “Damn it Daniel!” Hahaha I’m stealing the ‘fuck’ dance.
@turtlesnake3321
@turtlesnake3321 4 жыл бұрын
Dan is my spirit animal!
@PriyanMeewella
@PriyanMeewella 4 жыл бұрын
That is one overly attached thumbnail! Nailed it.
@girloftheo.r.1096
@girloftheo.r.1096 4 жыл бұрын
Love you hannah! Your videos are brilliant!!!
@marthedreamer7629
@marthedreamer7629 3 жыл бұрын
Hannah, have you considered making a video on fear of intimacy/commitment? The person who I like and likes me back doesn't want to have a relationship with me, and while I understand her motives (taking her time to move on from her ex) it's been a couple of confusing months and it'll be super useful to listen to your advice on it.
@juliettehamelle1747
@juliettehamelle1747 3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad therapy helped me go from preoccupied to secure 😅
@kelseyobrien6729
@kelseyobrien6729 4 жыл бұрын
Yes I'm a giant nerd for attachment, one of my favorite things to study as a psychology student is all the ways early attachment is related to future development and now I just learned that your attachment style can alter in adolescence because of peer relationships!! I'm anxious/ambivalent and learning that has helped to understand what I need and why I feel the way I feel so so much. I'm also super curious about why having anxious attachment seems to be more and more common now a days. This test calls it preoccupied btw.
@TashTaylor98
@TashTaylor98 4 жыл бұрын
Dan is a mood! 😅
@ZeeZeeDreaming
@ZeeZeeDreaming 4 жыл бұрын
I taught attachment style in psychology, so I've heard a lot about it - but not in the bedroom sense!
@museumhistory1
@museumhistory1 3 жыл бұрын
the "test questions" are part of how they clean up their data if they use your responses/results for research or analysis! Those questions 1) make sure you're not a bot 2) if you're not a bot, make sure you're actually responding to the questions and not just picking random answers. Definitely feels like you've seen the matrix when it happens tho 😂
@robertmenzies6939
@robertmenzies6939 4 жыл бұрын
Could not help noticing the Natalia was coming out at the start of the vid. She really is part of your life now 😉
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Hahahaha she part of me
@tuulimm1461
@tuulimm1461 4 жыл бұрын
I can't wait to do this test!
@aellalee4767
@aellalee4767 4 жыл бұрын
I'm very secure. Not surprised. Definitely want to see if my friends will take this.
@maddykeegan1006
@maddykeegan1006 4 жыл бұрын
*uses lunch break from marking psychology papers to watch more psychology content* yes, this is a break.
@animor7731
@animor7731 4 жыл бұрын
You're my favourite KZbinr 💖
@sydbricker4413
@sydbricker4413 4 жыл бұрын
You two are cute. Id love to see more of Dan commenting from the background 😂
@kilmameri
@kilmameri 4 жыл бұрын
12:02 lmao dan... sweet bean...
@wi2107
@wi2107 4 жыл бұрын
I've got "preoccupied" and that's quite true :D It fits with my Emotional Instability Personality Disorder (with which I get along very well now that I'm 23) :)
@nerdynadine5892
@nerdynadine5892 4 жыл бұрын
the quiz is full!
@TheWildLemons
@TheWildLemons 4 жыл бұрын
FFS I JUMPED when Dan spoke at the 12:08 mark when Dan responded to the bit about your relationship cause he was so much louder than you LMAO
@JudyCZ
@JudyCZ 4 жыл бұрын
Well, this made me properly envious. :D But also happy for you, Hannah, obviously. Because I'm clearly in the more anxious part of the diagram and I don't even have to take the test to realize that. On the other hand - I've just started going to therapy (over Skype now, of course) so what I'm taking from this video is that this is another thing that I definitely need to work on.
@jamesfv1
@jamesfv1 4 жыл бұрын
That’s my partners favourite Tim Minchin song! He sings it all the time! 😂 So good! I’m going to take this quiz but nervous since I just had to cut my off my parents thanks to abuse. It’s been horrible. But I’m looking forward to do it, work through therapy for a year and then try again. ☺️
@trevorkenny
@trevorkenny 4 жыл бұрын
not gonna lie, the thumbnail really drew me into this one. Love those eyes. :)
@HurricaneDDragon
@HurricaneDDragon 4 жыл бұрын
You and Dan are funny 🤣
@shadebytearksurvivor3361
@shadebytearksurvivor3361 4 жыл бұрын
Your so helpful
@lufuffle9091
@lufuffle9091 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you
@SpoonfulOfWaffles
@SpoonfulOfWaffles 4 жыл бұрын
12:33 That's a mood right there.
@robertmenzies6939
@robertmenzies6939 4 жыл бұрын
Did the basic test and results were. My attachment-related anxiety score is 1.11, on a scale ranging from 1 to 7 and my attachment-related avoidance score is 1.28
@dominique8230
@dominique8230 4 жыл бұрын
Hey Hannah, this thing where they ask you to tick a certain box in questionnaires is a very common practice in scientific studies. It's to evaluate whether the test subject is actually reading the questions or just clicking through them, which then would lead to the test being invalid. I've never seen it done in an online quiz though since usually, these type of questions are there to outrule invalid tests in big analyses. I am guessing, the fact that this question is in there indicates that there will be (or has been) analysis done on the replies to this quiz.
@ObsessedWallflower
@ObsessedWallflower 4 жыл бұрын
Dan is actually THE BEST 😂
@papayasaf5134
@papayasaf5134 4 жыл бұрын
For anyone who wants some (interesting) background on attachment types, I recommend watching some old videos of studies of attachment between babies and their mums. E.g. try searching 'the strange situation experiment'
@tamil.2128
@tamil.2128 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much sister.u read all the comm sis
@backgroundnoise9310
@backgroundnoise9310 4 жыл бұрын
Ended up in the dismissing region. Not a surprise.
@RazzleRed543
@RazzleRed543 4 жыл бұрын
I studied psychology at uni and four years ago I took the test and was fearful avoidant i believe... I took it today and came up secure! Yay for progress!! (From what I remember I think it’s pretty rare to change attachment styles but I think I’ve matured a lot in the last four years woo)
@GenocidexDreams
@GenocidexDreams 4 жыл бұрын
I haven’t taken the test yet, but I have a feeling I will be in the “fearful” category.
@courtneykirkbride3472
@courtneykirkbride3472 4 жыл бұрын
I am currently treating this as psychology revision hagahagaa 👀👀
@hannahwitton
@hannahwitton 4 жыл бұрын
Hahaha do it!
@zoe7day
@zoe7day 4 жыл бұрын
okay, i feel like im majorly f*cked up by just answering the questions!! lol
@neamhu-m479
@neamhu-m479 4 жыл бұрын
Hazan and shaver would be proud
@lavayuki
@lavayuki 4 жыл бұрын
I think I was the avoidant and dismissive type, I tend to run away when things get rough. It was pretty interesting
@shamroc34
@shamroc34 4 жыл бұрын
Love the Overly Attached Girlfriend thumbnail. Clickbait on point lol.
@aimeetrudgian4980
@aimeetrudgian4980 4 жыл бұрын
This video has made me realise how different hannah and I are. Almost all the questions I answered the opposite 🙈🤣
@AlphaMachina
@AlphaMachina 3 жыл бұрын
All of the above. Depends on the day and what's going on.
@Kat13196
@Kat13196 4 жыл бұрын
I’m an anxiety consumed mess with adhd and depression and with that comes the fun little addition of “rejection sensitive dysphoria” where like basically any perceived slight will make me convinced someone hates me and that I’m annoying and no one wants to be around me so 😂 I don’t even want to know where I fall on this chart
@pile333
@pile333 4 жыл бұрын
🎶 No hidden catch 🎶 🎶 No strings attached 🎶 🎶 Just free love 🎶 "Free Love " - Depeche Mode.
@kirstenwright932
@kirstenwright932 4 жыл бұрын
I got dismissive-avoidant in general, though secure with my parents & friend (though they are few and far between). Independent, career-oriented for so long that not sure where to even begin with a romantic relationship if I wanted one (which I might).
@ellyhinchsliff8655
@ellyhinchsliff8655 4 жыл бұрын
fearful avoidant here lol, can't say I'm surprised but hoping that will change now I'm at uni and have friends who actually care about me and can support me to develop as a person and all that
@KiSeaKatikka
@KiSeaKatikka 4 жыл бұрын
before I even watched the vid or knew what was going on read the title and went 'avoidant... there's avoidant that's me '
@zobothehobo
@zobothehobo 4 жыл бұрын
Have not taken the quiz yet but I know I am preoccupied with everyone except my primary partner with whom I am securely attached just from the description and the axis. Mom is likely closer to the center than anyone else but yeah I'm an anxious mess who just wants to be loved
@ireallyreallyhategoogle
@ireallyreallyhategoogle 2 жыл бұрын
I don't know about attachment style, but i do know that the only people that do care about me are my immediate family, and they are not and have never been much help when it comes to emotional support. I can tell them almost everything, my mom doesn't like it when i talk about wanting to die and my dad says i'm being manipulative, so i don't talk about that. I can always depend on them for financial support and general help, but they are not affectionate or able to help me with my emotions and mental health.
@alecwinner
@alecwinner 4 жыл бұрын
I got preoccupied but almost secure on the avoidance axis which is huge for me because i used to be suuupper fearful avoidant. Thankgod for therapy lol
@juligrlee556
@juligrlee556 4 жыл бұрын
I like long term supportive/cooperative/collaborative/coordinated action relationships. I've been married twice and both relationships. ended because of one of the items given above. Lack of support if not outright antagonism of who I am, no desire to coordinate with another on common family issues, no desire to cooperate with common decisions, and actual and obvious actions taken to oppose and destroy every inevitability and decision. How about refusing to talk for months? Passively filled with anger and insecurity.
@grolillkland6991
@grolillkland6991 4 жыл бұрын
took the basic test which resulted in high anxiety and middel avoidant, kinda new that so i'm hoping for a secure partner and that im able to improve my mental state. Love the video!
@ojiverdeconfleco
@ojiverdeconfleco 4 жыл бұрын
Go to therapy for that! While it can happen with a romantic partner or with other types of relationships, really that is a burden that no one should put on another person. It seems like you aren't talking just about an attachment style, but more of a general mental health issue. Therapy is the correct place for that (scientifically, legally).
@grolillkland6991
@grolillkland6991 4 жыл бұрын
@@ojiverdeconfleco I know, which is why im single :P I have been to therapy and are taking some SSRI anti depression medication but havent noticed any changes..
@ojiverdeconfleco
@ojiverdeconfleco 4 жыл бұрын
@@grolillkland6991 I'm sorry to hear that. Know that it takes some time to take effect, but def talk to your therapist and/or doctor about how you're feeling. Wish you the best!
@Rosannajoyx
@Rosannajoyx 4 жыл бұрын
I have a emotional personality disorder so yeah..... mental health will influence these results based on those questions
@saramiller611
@saramiller611 4 жыл бұрын
Securely attached! Surprisingly, as I am very insecure and I worry a lot about being left ;( But low avoidance and more to the secure side :D I guess it has helped me a lot by being in a relationship with someone who cares so deeply for me, lets me know, and reassures me when I'm feeling insecure
@taylorwilliams4179
@taylorwilliams4179 3 жыл бұрын
Took the Love Language test for myself and the bf did his seperately. My primary was Acts Of Service and his was Physical Touch. Both of our made sense to us. And I guess Im more content with washing dishes than I thought. :P
@jessestresse
@jessestresse 4 жыл бұрын
I think too many people are trying to use the site at once bc mine is having trouble loading 😅 I can predict I'm going to be firmly in the anxious category though before even taking it
@Beveybumblebee
@Beveybumblebee 4 жыл бұрын
Hannah, I think we crashed the site for the quiz "could not connect to MySQL: User rcfraley5 already has more than 'max_user_connections' active connections"
@isidoraspasic6543
@isidoraspasic6543 4 жыл бұрын
I'm a psychology student so if someone is interested a bit more about this it's the attachment theory who was brought by John Bolwby and Mary Ainswort besides these three styles, there's a fourth one called the disorganized attachment style which is common in those who have suffered some kind if trauma or neglect there are a lot of very interesting reaserches and experiments about this subject, it's honestly one of my favourite things I learned about in university so yeah I highly encourage everyone to look this up! 😁 also sorry if my english is not the best, not my first language 😅
@isidoraspasic6543
@isidoraspasic6543 4 жыл бұрын
oh ok the forurth style was talked about too hahah commented before the end of the video 😅
@kingodzilla2067
@kingodzilla2067 4 жыл бұрын
Hannah Wilton I like youtube channel and your video 👍😇 and your the best youtuber
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