Ashens Christmas Special 2011

[@ohnoanotherputz]

Some people watch those old Rankin Bass Christmas Cartoons for the Holidays. Others put on their favorite version of A Christmas Carol. Me? I watch old episodes of Ashens showing off Holiday Tat.

[@caretakergaming21A]

This is my Christmas tradition

[@km7189]

Shitfaced on homemade eggnog and trying to search up ashens Christmas

[@tncorgi92]

10 years on, still enjoy them.

[@Larkatiel]

Christmas Eve 2022, and I'm still watching these videos.

[@samholdsworth420]

​@@Larkatielalmost that time again! 😊

[@lunavixen015]

Technically that little tree at 15:00 is partially flame retardant as it didn't catch fire or sustain a flame, it charred and melt shrivelled.

[@icuseriously3346]

"A loose collection of pink horrors" is what I'm going to call my junk from now on.

[@rohat6537]

LL

[@Draco_-mk5zv]

"skyhorse" is what I'm going to call my junk from now on.

[@icuseriously3346]

The MM That's actually really good.

[@Draco_-mk5zv]

ICUSeriously Thats not what most people say after.

[@icuseriously3346]

The MM Because they are speechless?

[@NyxVetro]

I've been getting in the holiday spirit by rewatching all of these Christmas specials in reverse-chronological order and I've got to say, Ashens is by far the most *consistent* KZbinr I'm subscribed to. All of these Christmas specials are funny, but I couldn't tell you what year each one came out were in not in the titles because every single year has the EXACT same vibe to it. I love it.

[@hfgfdcrdtred]

Seriously, the only thing that changes is the camera quality, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

[@boskostoybox]

Ive been doing the same thing at 3am Christmas morning.

[@NyxVetro]

@@boskostoybox Merry Christmas!!

[@boskostoybox]

@@NyxVetro Merry Christmas to you too.

[@XenosInfinity]

To be fair, it's also partially because these shops produce the same calibre of crap every year. If they suddenly improved, you'd be able to tell no matter how Stuart presented it, but it's exactly as rubbish every time.

[@Fahrenheart]

Me and my friends bought several packets of those fake snow and spread them in our boss' office. We've been living off unemployment checks since.

[@TopMagician777]

pffft, XD

[@smb-c3po]

my friends and I* Yes, I'm 1/8 German.

[@varikvalefor]

Renko Usami Your grammar is atrocious. My friends and I. [F]ake snow (no “those”). [B]oss's.

[@classiccustoms2010]

Actually, it can be either boss' or boss's I believe.

[@somregularguy]

Renko Usami NOICE!!!!

[@felineki754]

The part where he tries the musical tie and it just makes some faint, feeble whining noise cracks me up.

[@amburrfershurr]

Your voice makes me so happy :')

[@wyv3rn1]

the blue rhino reminds me of those "house hippo" commercials they used to play here in canada.

[@SushiiZProductions]

Canadia brutha!

[@swampape3956]

Those were the best, I don't even know what the point of them was.

[@wyv3rn1]

D4t 0n3 I think it had something to do with "Don't believe everything you see on t.v." Though god dammit, so many of us did believe that commercial as kids.

[@RCLeahcar]

"Christmas isn't Christmas until you get your tiny blue rhino."

[@watchspotting]

As a long time ashes fan, the phrase "Rip, tear, rend" holds a special place in my heart.

[@elli_k]

tis the season to re-watch every Ashens x-mas special

[@ViewbobTrue]

Right??

[@dmd8552]

2022: Yes.

[@GenaTrius]

It's been bothering me all these years that the pink Christmas tree IS flame retardant. Flame retardant doesn't mean fireproof; it means that if you put a flame to it, it won't spread.

[@serana1445]

You're a very petty person if that actually bothers you. It's Ashens. Comedy. You know, ha ha and other such phrases.

[@SmokeyEdits]

+Serana To me, it's not really about Ashens being wrong, it's more about the fact that the fucking poundland tree is fucking flame retardant.

[@Crysinator]

+Jef the Facebook Guy Well I must say that you are completely right. It didn't start to burn therefore it is fire retardant.

[@SmokeyEdits]

***** Of all the hundreds of things that pounland tree could be, it _had_ to be fire retardant. Such a strange attribute for a strange item.

[@idou]

+Jef the Facebook Guy Whoa ok calm down, swearing is highly unnecessary

[@thekingsman9773]

Q:When is Christmas not Christmas? A:When it doesn't have a tiny blue rhino!

[@brittanystanton3705]

Why he didn't put the snow onto the tray I will never know

[@zacharywolf5666]

yeah, especially since he could have burned it instead of just vacuuming it

[@mattmanard8817]

Because Ashens

[@spicybeantofu]

Cause it was for fire and that snow stuff goes up too fast

[@ambatufakinat]

Joke: "Why do cows lay down in the rain? To keep each udder dry." Stuart: "Hahahahaha I wish I was dead." Me: *Chokes on drink in laughter*

[@hipperooni383]

'Bloody thing has blocked up the vacuum cleaner!'

[@dmd8552]

Merry Christmas 2022!

[@atsunome]

Nothing gets me in the festive spirit like seeing Poundland selling literal garbage!

[@beyondbeyond1965]

If I had a pound for every person that thought the knickers joke was racist, I'd be able to buy 7 festive mini-trees at the moment.

[@kubeek]

Flame retardant? Did it keep on burning? No! Apparentley yes, it is flame retardant.

[@4468]

I can't believe it's 3 years since Santa's psychedelic techno rave fireplace and blizzard sand blasted teddy snow globe, we're all getting old together. Merry Tatmass Everyone

[@TheLivingCatastrophe]

It's been 15 years now. Time flies too damn fast!

[@4468]

@@TheLivingCatastrophe I genuinely don't know what's happened to time. I can remember parts of this video like it was yesterday yet here we are so many years later.

[@Vintersemestre00]

These videos are one of the only reasons I'm still alive! Thanks Ashens!

[@TheCyclonesEye]

What do giant blue hedgehogs eat for lunch? Chili dogs.

[@OneTruePie]

Danky Kang?

[@Superstitious98]

OneTruePie Prince Zorldo?

[@legosrore]

Supra Mayro

[@sunshine.princess]

OneTruePie legosrore ***** +jmr gaming u r al wrong. ets clearli skroog da hejhawg.

[@sunshine.princess]

***** fien. but kan et b bof doe?

[@Cihl280777]

The sound of that tie reminded me of my old TV, right before it actually caught fire. True story too.

[@Mick_92]

"What could possibly go right?" - Ashens the bobcat.

[@OldMusicOnVinyl1]

The light-up musical tie were beaten the inside to can call. No, seriously. It's crying for help because a little Venetian boy was beating, with his trusty "Happy Baby" raygun, the tie's inside target - ITS LITTLE VOICE BOX! Brilliant. We wish you a Berry Mistmas... oh, wait, it's not that time of year yet. Oh well. At least this is the best Christmas Special that our lovely Dr. Stuart Ashen has ever concieved... well done, Dr. Ashen! Hats off to you!

[@rubeusvombatus]

So many years ago....

[@XxSombreroguyxX]

the earth was nothing but a molten mass

[@km7189]

fuk..

[@Dojan5]

You'll be cleaning out "snow" from that sofa for years to come! Years of joy for a single pound.

[@biglol4ever]

I miss the times when ashens burned things

[@michaelwilliams9566]

Dear Stuart, The presents for the pink three were probably meant to be decorative gifts to be placed under it, not in it.

[@xeoneex]

That tree towards the end... reminds me of all the nightmares in the world collected into a pink form

[@kylehax1763]

Are you sure those aren't hallucinations?

[@dustycrustyhomelessman1648]

that tree at the beginning is a pipe cleaner ass plug.

[@user-yo2lt8ch7v]

Dale Stevens Pipe Cleaner Ass Plug being an unreleased album by AC/DC

[@Ryan-og3xq]

3:25 it looks like Santa is giving us the middle finger

[@silvershocknicktail6638]

10:27 Surely that's a Spearmint Rhino?

[@SpookNukem]

3:24 the place that santa is going to is elm street. It looks like somebody has replaced his eyes with leds and blood is covering his face

[@SpookNukem]

Rk gaming 03 Nicolan Stantees?

[@SpookNukem]

Rk gaming 03 Jasus voorta?

[@SpookNukem]

Rk gaming 03 Nicolus santa Jason voohees

[@SpookNukem]

Rk gaming 03 .Ko

[@pferreira1983]

+Spook Nukem I would only buy it if it shot lasers from his eyes.

[@zero0karaoke]

Your videos get better and better Ashens, you'd think such a simple formula wouldn't last long, but I'm always looking forward to your next one.

[@Makemeupmissa]

you always cheer me up!

[@TinyVampetz]

Not a day goes by without watching at least one Ashens video.

[@Rasallon]

That pink tree looks like something from the classic series of Doctor Who

[@TopMagician777]

oh my god...it does!

[@sonje17]

We got given those mini trees ( like the pink one) in the childrens hospital, it was to make the bedsides have more of a 'christmas feel' and to make the ward seem more bright and cheerful

[@jonasbrm]

all aboard the chew chew train! We may not have a horn, but we have have goughlash!

[@tiitusl5061]

I just love your videos.They make me allways laugh.Keep up the great work.

[@Ryusuta]

I still LIKE the pink tree... =(

[@PycasneEesost]

+Ryusuta The first trees looked like the new reese's buttplugs..

[@BRUXXUS]

Watching in March of 2019.... and catching the Donnie Darko reference at the end. Well done!

[@MeenyMcSweeny]

3:20 Is Santa flipping us off?

[@DiamondProAlpine]

santa is giving us the middle finger and saying fuck you

[@rolopolo7975]

to all the kids

[@charontheghoul]

"right, we'll burn that later" oh ashens~how we love you

[@fwoqma]

ashens hittin the dabs w/ that butane torch

[@nikromancer188]

Is your profile picture from JJBA?

[@fwoqma]

yeah, jotaro from part four

[@jtr159]

"Nothing says Christmas like shoddy craftsmanship." oh SNAP, Classic Ashens!

[@CleverClothe]

The KZbin Algorithm giveth. The KZbin Algorithm taketh. Today it giveth.

[@RS250Squid]

Ashens is a good hangover cure. I just stick an ashens playlist on, drink loads of icy water, and sit around feeling sorry for myself :D.

[@lyokzi]

Santa's creepy pasta tie, he wears it when he eats children's souls

[@Silver_wind_1987_]

autymne honestly that tie reminded me of something krampus would put in your mail box...and that starts playing before he comes and kills ya

[@paladinboyd1228]

Amber Galway, I thought he didn’t kill you only punished you.

[@BolverkAtlasia]

I could feel Ashen's expression of disdain on that second joke.

[@markplott4820]

Cant poundland create some thing practical like a Fiberoptic Cabbage ?

[@andymadden8183]

Why that in particular?

[@athenathegreatandpowerful6365]

Mark Plott agreed. A fiber-optic Cabbage would be lovely!

[@JohannLudwigEdel]

My reaction at the tie. "The lambs, i can hear the lambs scream!"

[@mattymerr701]

Kinda wanted ashens to set the blowtorch on that inflatable santa at the end. I imagine ashens would be surprised by the pop and curse, acting like he didn't know what would happen.

[@Ultrox007]

When I think "christmas crackers" I think little flour wafers that you spread cheese on then consume xD

[@ZombieWolfe]

Omg the tie sounds so sad lmao

[@TheEclipsist]

... merry Christmas, Ashens!

[@spy4863]

I'm from the USA and I've just started watching your videos. I love them! I think you're a hoot! So this "Poundland" store chain and these 99 pie (Pee? Pea? Pye? Don't know how you spell it, but I'm assuming it means one penny less than a pound, right?) stores are the equivalent to the dollar stores we have over here, particularly "Dollar Tree" who produces the Greenbriar shit as you already know. You mentioned in one video that we Americans go crazy over Kinder's chocolate egg surprises, even though they were banned for having small parts that according to some idiot watchdog groups could be easily swallowed by small children-any parent who would be stupid enough to give their small child one of these choking hazards would probably also think nothing of giving fireworks and matches to their five-year-old to play with without any supervision, then blame the companies that made them when their kid gets burned! I love the toy surprises in the Kinder eggs, and I believe a lot of other Americans do too! Not to mention the chocolate is delicious! Better than most of the American made chocolates in my humble opinion! I guess we Americans just love surprises, especially ones found in Easter Eggs, which may be why we love the Kinder Eggs so much. The toys are so much better than the crappy stickers and candy usually found in American made plastic Easter eggs. I really wish they would lift the ban. It's not like banning the product is going to make kids stop stuffing things in their mouths that they could easily choke on. Maybe if more of these "watchdog" parents would watch their kids instead of their TVs, smartphones and laptops there might be fewer of these "accidents". And maybe there would be fewer "accidents" if some of those idiot parents would take just a little time to look at a product, examine it, then really consider if it's safe for their child, given what the product is, and the developmental stage of their child. No parent in their right mind would give a child a bicycle and expect them to ride it if the kid can't even walk! Well, enough blabbing on my part! I wish I could show my mom some of your videos! She shops at these dollar stores and thinks she's getting such a great bargain, then acts surprised when a lot of the stuff she gets turns out to to be total shit! Not even worth the dollar she paid for it! Hello! That's how they make money!-by making shit for less than a penny, and selling it for a dollar, making a 99.9% profit! I'm a name-brand buyer, and I do 90% of my shopping at Wal-Mart. Yes, I know there's a lot of controversy about them buying products from third-world countries, denying employees their pensions and benefits, etc., but they do sell name-brand quality merchandise for less than most retailers, the prices are only pennies more than your average dollar store, and the merchandise is of much better quality! Thanks for posting these great funny videos!

[@bushigambino1903]

Just 99p, mate.

[@TheMrKeksLp]

TL;DR

[@TheFourMcStuges]

I drown in a Hopeless Ocean Pye xD

[@orhowilearnedtostopworryin9682]

The "pie" stands for pence. That was a bit cringe reading your post. I'm American and I still know that 99p is 99 pence, lol

[@KirbyMario12345_939]

Fun Fact: 99p Stores is closing down and will be absorbed into Poundland.

[@DerricoMusic]

Haha, Ashens cracks me up. I always watch him when I'm procrastinating writing music.

[@CounterNerd]

Whoever use pink christmas trees deserve a punch in the face for christmas.

[@zhouhuanyue]

+CounterNerd I'll help deliver it to them for you :D

[@CounterNerd]

HuanYue Zhou It's okay, I'll just put it down on my wishlist for Christmas. I'm sure Santa has no problem assisting me with my present.

[@SmokeyEdits]

puu.sh/lueRK/727799b9ad.png I love this website. (KZbin, I mean. Although puush is pretty damn handy)

[@CounterNerd]

Jef the Facebook Guy Puush is indeed handy :D That's a great screenie.

[@IxCANxHAZxCOOKIE]

My integrated algebra teacher was wearing that musical tie today. I had a dumb smile 'pon my face all day. :)

[@Magmafrost13]

that fucking crown isn't even fucking inflatable

[@minecraftwithcookies]

i have no idea why i find this entertaining...

[@KershawIII]

Hello-ho-ho

[@Tomato-qn5sg]

wheres murdoc i havent seen him since strobelight and that was a month

[@tdata545]

I have something called a "PINK RHINO" from Mantis the fine makers of gun products. The pink rhino is a 9mm cartridge that goes in your gun and when you fire it, a laser comes out. For safe target practicing at home, to be paired with the Mantis X gun training attachment. You can also buy special targets that light up when shot to train your aim, and fire speed. Neat device. Moreso the mantis X bit, the Rhino is meh.

[@kyrandle3637]

#tinyrhino

[@boris2342]

I screen captured the pink tree... it is now my wallpaper at work

[@weeseet]

WHY ARE YOU JUST PEELING THEM OPEN? WHY AREN'T YOU CRACKING THEM?

[@MayIHazAcookie]

you idiot if you check FURTHER in video he actually tries to crack one and it still doesn't work -.-

[@weeseet]

If he was going to open them all anyway, he might as well TRY the way it was intended. They may not have all been duds. Also, no need to be an asshole about it.

[@MayIHazAcookie]

weeseet lol sorry. actually i'm surprised he didn't burned them all and red each and every single one of those jokes.

[@ParilPMC]

@haributo at 12:48, you can see a little thing moving around above the green christmas cracker (near the top-left of his metal sheet).

[@leonidas14775]

The pink christmas tree could actually be a reference to the 1960s Peanuts christmas special. but who seriously watches that anyway

[@TopMagician777]

My family watches that every year. Along with the Rudolph special (cant remember the name), Home Alone, and Elf. Is that a bad thing? o-0

[@obune1]

Ally Perkins maybe

[@TopMagician777]

aww mannn.

[@IamCoalfoot]

@10:05 "What do you call a chicken in a shell suit? An egg." That would be the Easter joke.

[@RickSatan]

HOW DARE YOU THIS IS A COMPLETE INSULT TO JESUS CHRIST'S BIRTHDAY STOP INSULTING MY RELIGION

[@balloonicornpride2237]

"STOP INSULTING MY RELIGION" You proclaim anonymously over the internet. Stop using all capitals and being a overly-protective Christian. This holiday is about a jolly red-suited fat man bringing toys, not some book about a magic man who created a species that seems to be failing educationally, as you just proved. Okay? Alright. Good day.

[@alexzonneveld329]

Stfu...

[@RickSatan]

Balloonicorn Pride NO CHRISTMAS IS NOT ABOUT A FAT MAN CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT JESUS CHRIST

[@balloonicornpride2237]

+SuperAmazingRickSatan972StrikesBack All right... just take your book of lies while I show you the morals of that book. It says to rape women to gain ownership. And to love thy neighbor but never love another man...? So if your going to preach at me about "CHRISTMAS IS NOT ABOUT SANTA!" just consider other things aswell. Like, what if you are praying to the wrong god? And every time you pray it makes him angrier. I'm not saying you are the biggest dumbass for beliving in religion... but I'm just saying THINK be fore you say something stupid on the internet

[@melissanelson5483]

Would u chill

[@nrdesign1991]

I can't wait for this year's special.

[@spindalis79]

The joke about the robbers, was that intended to sound racist? He even says it would work better if you spelled knickers without the "k." Is there some English vernacular I'm missing here?

[@kevinpatrickcarey3741]

+spindalis79 oh for the love of....its KNICKERS which is a british slang for UNDERWEAR. I think your the racist because it seems like you purposely heard N@@@s or was purposely looking for it.

[@zanderadams4448]

+Kevin Carey 'Knickers' isn't "slang" whatsoever, just another term for underwear.

[@tk-5268]

+Zander “Z4” Adams you just defined slang...

[@mcrtrash]

+Kevin Carey so everyone who can identify racism is racist? it sounds really racist to me.

[@kevinpatrickcarey3741]

no it just seems everyone is looking for it purposely

[@jdbaron25]

I like the little bug that crawls behind the tree on the sofa at 14:51

[@mcpsychaotic7968]

I kinda like the look of the fibre optic trees. Look like happy little trees that Bob Ross would be proud of. "An excellent reference"

[@SimplyBimply]

i hope i wasn't the only one who completely lost it at the end and burst out laughing

[@BulletOfBullets]

That tie sounded like Santa crying. Then when the eyes started flashing too, I was proven right.

[@TheToppings]

That pink tree is almost exactly like the one on the front desk at work. Except our one sheds bits of sparkly pink stuff everywhere.

[@7nationarmy1]

The parth where you cut the pop-up santas head off was the funniest!!

[@PumpkinHeadJim]

ah ashens. he's doing wat we were all scared to do. makeing good videos

[@arbitor365]

"A pair of knickers" 10:44 There is another dimension to this joke that Ashens didnt pick up on

[@RS250Squid]

Yaaaaay! I've been waiting a whole year for the "Hello, ho ho!"

[@applekrumble]

It's not Christmas without Ashens Christmas Special.

[@TMOvids]

"what do ghosts eat? GOUGLASH!" - best christmas joke ever

[@godslaughter]

NOOOO ASHENS, you didn't pop them all!! My pyrotechnics-loving heart is broken

[@jnerdsblog]

I too wanted Hungry Hungry Hippos for Christmas, and Santa never delivered! What gives!

[@sfighter991]

Wow, Pound Land must have a tendency to make some of the most crappiest Christmas stocking stuffers in the world. Merry Christmas Stuart!!! :D

[@tye48645]

That Santa tie sounds like an alien bloody transmission trying to contact earth

[@fuzzyferretlady]

Omg, the ghost joke made me laugh so hard I started crying.

[@yasup9442]

What the hell is wrong with you.

[@yasup9442]

in america we dont have good sarcasm.

[@nighthawk0490]

Office scene, "hey Tod, nice tie" "Yeah, it plays music too! Here listen" ....... "HOLY CRAP!" *clutches chest*. Killing boss not the best way to spend christmas, haha

[@ootwii]

Merry christmas and im glad i subscribed to these videos... Nice job ... Keep up the good work...

[@uselessDM]

Well, I would say the pink tree is flame retardant, because it didn't continue to burn after you ignited it.

[@bylucien]

I very much enjoyed the Donnie Darko reference, kudos mr ashens

[@mothra__13]

the singing tie music reminds me of lavender town in the old pokemon games

[@scotty_blocks]

I'm sure there were Warhammer characters called Pink Horrors; demonic creatures that followed the Chaos God Tzeentch.

[@skate96production]

gj ashens, your channel is getting bigger everyday, i watched 2 videos of yours first time, enough to subscribe, good reviews, allways make me laugh =D keep up :))

[@tictac9490]

"bloody thing has clogged up the vacuum cleaner" classic

[@caseyrevoir]

Do not burn "possessed" things. They/it is trapped in the item, the fire can jolt it out, and you happen to be close. Just throw it away or bury the suspected item.

[@tob2089]

but it’s not as funny