How One Man Kept Water Cremation Illegal

Come on in, the water’s fine! (Really, it’s FINE)
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**PRODUCTION CREDITS**
Mortician and Writer: Caitlin Doughty
Producer and writer: Louise Hung (@LouiseHung1)
Editor & Graphics: Andy Windak
Thumbnail: Landis Blair (@LandisBlair)
Production Coordinator: Lauren Ronaghan
The Ballad of Dick Hamm performed by DARRENCORP (@darrencorp)
Thank you to our dear friend Katrina Spade of Recompose for sharing some of her experiences with us for this video.
Thank you Hannah at Bio-Response Solutions for providing information and support in the creation of this video!
**SELECTED SOURCES & ADDITIONAL READING**
“Native Hawaiians look to revive traditional ‘clean burial’ practices”
www.staradvertiser.com/2015/0...
“Lawmakers to Bolster Native Hawaiian Burial Traditions With Modern Technology”
www.hawaiipublicradio.org/loc...
Bio-Response Solutions
aquamationinfo.com/
LegiScan - “LegiScan provides services that bring all legislative information together into a single uniform interface”
legiscan.com/
Qico
qicoinc.com/
Recompose
recompose.life/
“Casket-making lawmaker helps kill bill allowing alternative to burial”
www.indystar.com/story/news/p...

[@ROyler-rs6nh]

I find it wild that funeral directors are precious about "grandma becoming soup" when we also "pump grandma full of chemicals to make her into a creepy doll to stare at" and/or 'light grandma on fire"

[@malkies6341]

Yeah you’d think if they were chill with butt plugs and chemical replacement of blood they wouldn’t have a problem with aquamation!

[@fgregerfeaxcwfeffece]

You forgot about the part where he sells you overpriced accessories for your grandma doll.

[@PheNom1466]

As long as you don't turn grandma into chilli...

[@charlesfriend9557]

@@PheNom1466 She was chewier than her old mule we ate last decade, yet had some sweet floral aftertaste!

[@reversepolarity8981]

My question is, what happens to the chemicals used to dissolve the corpse in the "aquamation"? Seems like it would leave just as much of a carbon footprint in a different way, when you're left with having to dispose of the remaining sludge.

[@Liz_ArdE]

Honestly the scariest part of this isn't rotting corpses, burning flesh, or human goo running down the drains, it's the fact that someone with such obvious self interest can be elected to be a representative of a people and convince everyone else not to represent a widely uncontested option with blantent lies.

[@TallulahFoxxx]

I’m in Scotland and I was also appalled by this lol 😭😩 It would absolutely be deemed a conflict of interest here and he would have to openly disclose his financial interests in the funeral industry before lobbying like that. Failure to disclose that would be a breach of ministerial code which is grounds for suspension. It shocks me how many clear conflicts of interest are apparent in US politics, and how they can quietly go about their business without openly disclosing it 😩😭 He could say “I own multiple casket companies, but the reason I chose that line of business is because I personally believe it’s the best choice for death care for XYZ reasons. My view of aquamation has to do with what I believe is right for our dead loved ones, and less to do with my business interests” THEN he could make his argument 😂 I mean, I still wouldn’t believe a word he says and it’s bullshit anyway, but at least he would be being upfront about his interests and the committees could make their own judgements on whether or not his motivations are purely financial 😂 The outright deception is what scunners me

[@mattberg6816]

99% of the politicians in the states should do time for insider trading

[@sharaiboop2]

Exactly...just disgusting. Pure evil.

[@NoahGooder]

welcome to the USA

[@roguewolf7053]

@@TallulahFoxxx I wish there was an agency here in the US which enforced such rules, policies & laws we have here. Instead it’s left up to the political party to hold their members to such things or even just to the individual lawmaker’s “honor”(like in our Supreme Court!).🤯🙄😒🤬 We have a major problem here in the US. Not only is our governing bodies *heavily* influenced by the literal trillions spent by major businesses & the top 1% in lobbying but to even RUN for congress, senate or other high level federal or even state office the person *HAS* to be rich bc of the cost of running for office here!! So instead of elected officials who understand what average Americans face daily…we have mostly people who were born rich & have never faced the issues average Americans face!🤬🤯 Hence most politicians here suggesting the *poor* simply need to “learn to budget their money better” rather than needing better assistance from the government or raising the minimum wage. They can’t fantom the idea of simply not having enough money to pay for basic necessities. You can’t “budget” nonexistent money! But the fact there is essentially no legal agency to hold them to the rules, policies & laws they are supposed to follow is why we are seeing *a LOT* of the issues/problems in our government right now. BC one thing Trump has always done & pushed is exploiting loopholes in the law for business purposes…and he brought that same logic/attitude to politics. And now his party are flaunting themselves doing so openly rather than quietly out of public view. It’s terrifying but hopefully Americans wake up & see the truth soon.

[@ROC-585]

My mom LOVES water and is terrified of fire. As soon as we found out about Aquamation, she was so excited and said "YES. THIS IS WHAT I WANT. Send me off in my bathing suit!". Then.... we found out NY State didn't offer it. It's approved for pets only here. So, if not available by that time I'm literally transferring her to wherever else it can be done and screw NYS on getting my money. I don't understand, I really don't.

[@ADayT0Remember210]

We used aquamation for my older brother a couple days ago. It was cheaper than cremation. We discussed his death just a couple weeks before he overdosed on his 32nd birthday and he was so scared to be buried or cremated. We’re using some of his bones to plant a tree after winter. The entire process was much better than our first option which was cremation. I love the idea so much now that I know about it.

[@jxn1056]

I am so sorry for your loss! ❤ and prayers for peace and comfort.

[@therabbithat]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad you were able to honour his wishes. The tree idea is beautiful

[@chrissy24-7]

May your brothers memories abide for blessings 💜

[@nancymatolay2127]

So very sorry for your loss. My son is an addict and has overdosed twice. I worry so much that one day he'll overdose and I won't be here to find him. I pray you have peace. I love the idea about using some of the bones to plant a tree.

[@ADayT0Remember210]

@@nancymatolay2127 I found my brother. Did CPR on him. It was very traumatic to say the least. There isn’t much we can do for them. I showed him tough love, then accepted him in after his car accident because he was sober for weeks. Then the drugs ran out from the hospital and he got some laced ones from the streets. Don’t blame yourself. Don’t try to prepare yourself. Just do everything you can but be kind to yourself too. It’s a real battle they’re going through. You can’t always save them. Prayers to you mama bear.

[@CrusifoxMedia]

We did aquamation for my grandfather. It was thankfully allowed to be done in my Province recently (Ontario, Canada). He was a firefighter for 30+ years and got cancer from the smoke and burn remnants going into his lungs and body. He fought various cancers for 11 years before his body gave up. He was very afraid in his last days, pleading with my mom to make sure he was "good and dead before you cremate me" (he was terrified of being burned, as most firefighters are) During the final days, I brought up aquamation to my mom as a fire-free alternative (thanks in part to this channel making me want to do more research on greener burials) and she agreed it was what was best to soothe his soul. I have a mini-urn with his remains next to his badge and preserved flowers from his memorial.

[@rydz656]

Savages. What a waste of water.

[@CrusifoxMedia]

@@rydz656 fun fact, the amount of water used in 1 aquamation is far less than what a household uses in a day. And those nutrients can be used to revitalize soil and act as a fertilizer to promote growth

[@monicajane7888]

I was just wondering if we had it here in Ontario. Glad to see we do.

[@Chris-xk9rt]

Teared up reading this. Definitely what he deserved.

[@RubyBlueUwU]

That’s beautiful, a true testament to how important body care can be to people, the individuals and their families.

[@d.e.s4432]

I had my mom aquamated a couple of years ago. She grew up by the ocean and always thought of herself as a water baby. I felt returning her to water was a much more appropriate choice than cremation. I was present when it happened and even pressed the button to start the machine. It was the final gift I could give her to send her on her way. It was difficult but ranks among the best things I've ever done. Thank you for teaching me that it was a possibility, and thanks to whoever in the death industry lobbied to legalize it in Oregon.

[@ninamason9001]

My mom wanted a traditional burial, which I’m not a fan of, but it was her wish. After seeing the “watch me get embalmed” video I called the funeral home and asked if I could do her makeup, since she did it in a very particular way. Our family mortician was surprised, but agreed. When I got into the viewing room to do her makeup I brought her own cosmetics, put on some of her favorite music, fixed her hair….it gave me such peace to know she looked as she’d want to look. And hearing other family and friends say how perfect she looked, that it was exactly as they remembered from [insert various important life cycle events here], I felt like I’d done them a service, too. That video did more to bring me closure and comfort than anything else I’d encountered in 32 years. …and, now our family mortician is suggesting this as an option for families. One step at a time.

[@TheCaptainSplatter]

@@ninamason9001 there is two reasons i dont want a traditional burial. Unlikely but im afraid of waking up 6 feet under. The other cost. Im dead what the hell am i gonna do with a fancy casket?

[@ozok17]

@@TheCaptainSplatter funerals are partly for the living. that said, those who survive you are likely to want to respect your wishes, and grieve feeling they're doing right by your memory. so, you can think of a funeral as a sort of final parting party, in your honor.

[@TheCaptainSplatter]

@@ozok17 you could do that with my ashes.

[@ozok17]

@@TheCaptainSplatter yup, totally.

[@antlersnelson2955]

My mom had a water cremation after I showed her you videos. She loved she got one more bath and was so happy she got to me more environmentally conscious. Thank you for informing me about this and I let my mom know and she made an informed decision for after her passing

[@LordMizumaru]

I'm sorry for your loss. This is a powerful anecdote and I hope Caitlyn sees it some day and knows her content was a part of making someone's death easier for both the family and the deceased.

[@cynthmcgpoet]

I was a teenager when my parents signed up for pre-need services. I asked about cremation, and the salesman said that the body would not be Raptured after cremation. Wow, that completely de-powered God in my mind.

[@marym922]

Ridiculous! People have died in all sorts of ways, and frankly, that salesman clearly DID NOT know what he was talking about.

[@douglasgraebner1831]

Isn't...isn't the whole point of the rapture that it involves non-dead people?

[@douglasgraebner1831]

@@marym922 oh no I mean the rapture IIRC is based on a (somewhat controversial) reading of a specific line about being "caught up in the clouds" before the tribulation as distinct from the general resurrection of the dead, which is why it's somewhat of a marginal belief generally. Settling aside the general questions about "how much was Revelations actually written to predict the future and how much was a backdoor anti-Roman allegory"

[@aaronfreeman5264]

I wanna come back as Swamp Thing!

[@helenr4300]

It was a long time Christian view that the body be buried whole ready for bodily resurrection, when there was plenty of land and less people that was not such an issue. Cremation was considered pagan at first, something the Hindus did on open pyres, among other cultures. But it became an option late 1800s, and the mindset of whole body burial as the only religious way was shaken by the level of death, in ww1 trenches and the volume of bodies never recovered, or only partially recovered. It made theologians, at least here in the UK, have to tackle that persisting folk theology, and that the Bible talks of new bodies in heaven. Catholic dominated countries were slower in this than the protestants, and Muslims are still expected to be buried. The rapture end times stuff is much much newer than the history of the expectation to Bury a body whole. Rapture theology was late 1800s but mostly a theme picked up in certain quarters of churches in 20th century, a high proportion of those being in the US.

[@smokeyskeet1694]

It’s so weird that people think it’s disrespectful to compost bodies. I think it’s quite nice… you’re returning back to the earth and helping others by doing it

[@milkinamug3357]

As long as I can remember my parents always said they want to be composted when they die.

[@lillithdoe5075]

The problem is we have a hard time letting go, composting might be better received if they lead with the environmental benefits and the opportunity for living mementos in the form of "mom's favourite flowers growing in mom"

[@mariarivera4197]

From dust to dust.

[@kerwynbrat5771]

I did aquamation for my dogs. They were brothers and 20 years old. They died a day apart. The fluid left was used on a tree in the park since it is so rich in nutrients. They placed a plaque with my puppies names and dates on the tree and they donated a tree in their name as well. They gave me the remains for burial (I have a lovely box for them) It was wonderful and I have decided that I will have that for myself. It is VERY green, a bit more expensive than cremation (not by much) and my body can be used the help green things grow better. Since all those green things kept me alive all my life, it only seems right to give back.

[@kidlit]

I love this idea. Since I was a teen, I have always wanted to be cremated or just put in a cardboard box and buried under a willow tree. Then I was told it would be too much and kill the tree. This is PERFECT! Thank you for sharing. 🥰

[@mountaineer_47]

They just opened a pet aquamation facility in my city. I am considering it for my dog when the time comes. I like that in your case they used the fluid for the trees.

[@debarkovit]

I have found a beautiful place where both my dogs and me can have a natural burial together. I have bought a plot and my previous dogs ashes will be buried with us. Feels really good to know we will all be together.

[@MelzoA.]

This is the most wonderful thing I ever heared! Sounds perfect. Well, I dont think this will come to germany soon….

[@AquaSue]

I'm hoping Arizona will offer aquamation as a 'green' burial alternative!

[@AlchemicKitten]

As a Norwegian, I find embalming and entombing really, really creepy, the dead are supposed to disappear and in 20 years someone else can be buried there. My grandfather chose regular burial and grandmother wants to be cremated, but it's a double grave, so there's room for the whole family! I know several (single) people who wants to share their parents graves.

[@vipervidsgamingplus5723]

I feel like that part about sharing a grave with parents is really creepy.

[@tunasandwich8049]

​@@vipervidsgamingplus5723you wont really complain once you start using it

[@riograndedosulball248]

Down here in Brazil, graveyard plots are a family property (that we have to pay taxes for. Another W for secular state!) Graves are usually made 4 feet deep, with two slots underground, and one above. The entire family is supposed to be interred in the same plot. When space is needed, the bones are gathered and laid in the lowest compartment. the new casket is placed above that. Currently, my grandparent's grave holds the remains of three family members. I have seen up to seven names in the same headstone.

[@juliaspoonie3627]

It’s the same here in Austria and Germany, you can’t even buy a grave for „forever“ and only rent it for at most 10 years, then you can buy it for another 10 years and so on. Family graves are the most common ones, either you share it with your parents and grandparents, your partner, siblings or children. My dad was cremated and lies in the same urn-grave (yes, buried) with his parents, my mom was buried in the same grave as her parents and brother. If nobody is paying for the grave anymore and bones aren’t fully decomposed, they get either put in a mass grave or you can choose to add them to another grave without a casket (graves are either single, family for up to 4, or crypts above the ground for 4-10 so you can exhume and put the oldest ones away after at minimum 10 years). Hubby wants to be placed into the same grave as me but I‘d love a composting funeral (not yet possible). Definitely no cremation for me. I think it has a lot to do with limited space. Many communities don’t allow burials from people who live somewhere else for example.

[@freezo244]

Rep Hamm’s mouth looks familiar…

[@revzed7597]

I was in Canada taking care of my grandmother in her final days, and happened to be watching one of Caitlin's videos (the S.S. Eastland) when my grandmother passed away. I took a break from these videos for a little while because the reminder hurt, but advocated (alongside the funeral director) for my grandmother to be aquamated because of what I had learned about it from Caitlin previously. Coming back to this channel and seeing this video, it feels like some kind of sign. Maybe that's silly, but it means a lot to me.

[@tiffanyholman4028]

I'm glad you had that confirmation from your grandma and I'm sorry for your loss.

[@jesush.christ5978]

I took care of my grandma before she passed, and like me she did not want a funeral, because it seems morbid for people to stand around looking at a dead body. She was cremated, and we had a memorial serves for her. I wouldn`t want my family`s last memory of me to be in a casket. I`d rather they remember me how I was when alive.

[@theduder2617]

It matters not what ANY of us think. You clearly loved and respected your grandmother. That is the only thing which matters. May she rest well.

[@61rampy65]

@@jesush.christ5978 I love your post, as it reflects exactly how I feel about death. In our extended family, the memorial service usually turns into a giant party with some tears shed. You celebrate their life, in addition to mourning their death.

[@C.V317]

I love when we get to learn about the science behind how bodies are handled. It’s like the Magic School Bus for the dead.

[@andromedatheharpy9087]

lowkey wanna draw caitlin as ms frizzle now sfyxfxfuy

[@eminempreg]

Pls let this be a normal video! WITH CAITLIN!? NO WAY

[@lbatemon1158]

Mary Roach's book, Stiff: The Curious Lives of Corpses is such a good read! I would love to see Caitlin and Mary team up sometime, though Mary has moved on to other projects.

[@meldunk4444]

@@lbatemon1158 This is the dynamic duo I never knew I wanted until now. I heard about Mary Roach through this channel, actually!

[@fancyincubus]

That's what it felt like in my highschool forensic science class

[@kevinsachs314]

It's really hard not to see it as cartoonishly villainous when you might want to have a non-tranditional handling of your body and a bunch of politicians and business owners tell you "No, you're not allowed to have bodily autonomy. Pay us lots of money instead." I'm sure they're REALLY concerned about how "disrespectful" it is.

[@ayates784]

Agreed. Money is usually at the root of it.

[@c_lee.]

Yeah, not surprising as experimental shots are forced on people. We can't even escape this nonsense when dead.

[@amandajones661]

As a woman, I feel this in my soul.

[@goldenxninjaxchick]

I'm a licensed FD/EMB (mostly embalmer) in Virginia who got into the profession 4 years ago when my grandmother died and I got curious, started looking into the funeral industry, and came across your videos. I just emailed my representatives today about aquamation and composting! I'm an embalmer, but first and foremost I'm a person who's committed to serving grieving families. And that means championing causes like aquamation and composting so that they can have more options. Thank you so much for leading the way toward progress. 🖤💙💚

[@osteophagus]

I wouldn't mind being goo, to be fair. I'm actually being composted, after hearing about Recompose from y'all! I told my friends and family if I die they're getting a pot of soil made of me and I will haunt them if they let my plant die.

[@sunb5738]

I'd love to be composted but it's sadly illegal in my country I hope it'll change by the day I die haha

[@sarahr8311]

As someone whose plants do best when I forget about them (shoutout to my unkillable basil plants) the thought of being haunted if I let a plant die is... haunting.

[@_vnfr]

i think the idea of being dissolved in acid is pretty metal actually although i wouldn't want anyone to look

[@shronkler1994]

​@@sunb5738 sorry, but I don't think legislation can be passed in just 72 hours.

[@2bleushadow]

😂 👻

[@strayiggytv]

What did people think happened to bodies before we started embalming them? They decomposed! It's wild to see these groups act like we've always been buried in fancy coffins preserves in chemicals. Completely insane.

[@ragnkja]

Embalming isn’t even the norm in most of the world. _Store Norske Leksikon_ (the main encyclopaedia in Norwegian) specifically mentions USA, Canada and Australia as countries where embalming is common. Elsewhere in the world it’s practically only used to preserve cadavers that medical students train on.

[@strayiggytv]

@@ragnkja exactly! I wasn't aware there were religious groups out there acting like letting a body decompose is some sin. That's so wild to me I don't even know how to handle it lol

[@simonnachreiner8380]

Embalming came about around the time of the civil war and quickly gained popularity as it allowed families to view their dead despite the fact that those dead often had to be transported several thousand miles from the battlefields where they fell. The idea of sin and all that comes from the idea of the resurrection on judgement day. That when Christ returns the dead will rise again in time for perfect judgement before going to eternal bliss or condemnation. Part of this idea was that the bodies would wait in their graves for this. Logically this resulted in people and theologians wondering "If there's no body can you rise again on the second coming?" Then when embalming came about the people making a lot of money from it fed into these fears and used them as marketing. A lot of things can basically boil down to "Follow the money" with Catholicism. There used to be the idea that if you weren't burred in hallowed ground _sanctified by a priest_ you would be condemned to purgatory and never make it to heaven.

[@jessicasinsuan1195]

@@simonnachreiner8380 this is very informative! Thank you! It's ironic... in the Holy Scriptures, I don't believe embalming was ever mentioned except for two accounts... Jacob/Israel and Joseph (who were in egypt when they died). I know the Egyptians would embalm their dead, but not sure if the Israelites/Jews or first century christians ever did. Time for research!

[@strayiggytv]

@@simonnachreiner8380 it's still wild to me because even embalmed the body still decomposes somewhat. If you dug up a body embalmed 50 years ago it wouldn't look all that great so I'm just kind of flabbergasted by the leap in logic. If people think we'll be magically resurrected from the grave why the heck wouldn't they just assume our bodies would be magically restored!? Like do they actually think God will look at people whose bodies are skeletons from sheer age and go "ewww icky pooie! Can't resurrect this guy his body is to nasty! Such a shame too he was a really righteous guy!" Like wtf lol

[@Amandaaa2244]

I donated my lizard to Cornell’s veterinary school because he had a novel cancer and the pathologist wanted to study him. I was so happy when I got his ashes back and it said he was aquamated! Truly, you helped make his very premature death a little bit less terrible.

[@WobblesandBean]

I'm so sorry for your loss. What was his name, and what species was he?

[@ashleyashcraft1754]

Surprisingly, I think aquamation is more common with animal remains than human at this time in history.

[@Amandaaa2244]

@@WobblesandBean bearded dragon, his name was fury! He was the goodest boy 🥹

[@nancyjo517]

😅

[@heatherlynnrigaud7385]

Hey Caitlin, I've just discovered your channel, and honestly, I can't stop watching. One of my hobbies is soapmaking. To make soap, you mix water, an alkaline base, and lipids. (Oils, fats, butters) So when I heard about Alkaline hydrolysis, I had a light-bulb moment of "Hang on, they're making soap!" And sure enough, soap is listed as one of the by-products of the process; Not a huge amount, but it's the thought that counts. Soap is one of the first things humans learned to make, by mixing ashes from cooking fires with animal fat. And soap is ground zero for preventing disease, as we all have learned over the last few years. Needless to say, I'm now fully on Team Aquamation and will be encouraging my state to adopt it as a practice. Thank you so much for all the information you present so well. You have touched many people's lives, by providing invaluable information that we need in some of our most challenging times.

[@pray4us955]

You broke the first rule

[@redblaze2613]

Do yourself a favour and watch her videos slowly. Sadly she only puts them out every 1-2 months now.

[@Daelyah]

Adipocere comes to mind, but I can only imagine corpse wax being used in fiction for dark magic.

[@lindsaychristovich4108]

@@redblaze2613 check out her book!

[@anitanielsen1061]

Ooooh, so THAT’S why soap was one of the first things Senku made in Dr Stone before Taiju depetrified!

[@lbcooley2386]

Girl, you have changed my thoughts on dying so much. I've decided to be buried on my daughters property with a shroud. My thought it like yours, why do we do this when we can dig up people buried for years and they look recent - so not cool. I'm 65 now and with my end looming I'm so happy I found you on youtube and helped me figure this stuff out. Seriously thank you.

[@birdtheword2780]

I saw Caitlin on my local news the other day and shouted "oh my gosh! That's the death rights lady! I love her!" and my mom shushed me so we could finish hearing what you were saying about alternative cremation. 😂 Congratulations on this pivotal victory, from both the earth and all future eco-friendly dignified deceased everywhere!

[@theselfcaremaven]

💛

[@Teakip]

My mother is mixed native and in recent years has brought up her concern with some tribes believing burning the body keeps the soul trapped on this plane, but she abhors the idea of being left to rot in the ground forever in a box. Thank you so much for this video, now I know there are other options that will make her feel more safe. We recently lost my uncle (her brother) and he was cremated, so I can imagine she’s had it on her mind lately.

[@marypasco2213]

Another option is to bury the shell and plant a tree in it. Just make sure you write down the latitude and longitude. Just an idea.

[@noellem9319]

If she lives in WA or a few other states she could be composted. It doesn't take a long time and then she can be returned back and help the earth grow. I am planning to do this. I want to become catnip and silvervine beds.

[@ibthefroggies]

Interestingly, some tribes cremate their family member in the grave. The grave is their home and the dirt over the grave is kept high and peaked like a roof. They burn everything that belonged to the person as well.

[@andromedaspark2241]

There are green burial sites that don't require/push embalming and allow burying in a shroud or woven basket. The body doesn't last long usually. Maybe that'd help?

[@creeknativegirl]

I’m Native and from what I know from the tribe I’m from is that several of our elders that have passed on were buried similar to a green burial i believe if I had to compare but they didn’t go with embalming but left the body as and was buried in wood caskets instead of the type modern casket. I believe from my understanding that it was a way they felt would give back to the earth but also give the family peace. I’m not gonna say that it happens much now but most from the tribe I’m from use a good bit of the different ways offered for afterlife care.

[@pepijnkok]

With the scare part on cremation as mentioned, I live in a buddhist country, and as a euphamism, people DO refer to a cremation as BBQ at times. also, most cremations here are half open casket, you actually walk past the casket with the body burning inside and the practice is that you add flowers into the open casket (not fully, just a jar mainly) while saying you goodbyes.

[@annamariacaftanista]

Brilliant. I'm a college English instructor, and my sample synthesis paper is on the topic of environmentally friendly forms of burial wherein I discuss aquamation, human composting, and natural burial. Two of the three are legal here in NC where I teach. I am proud to say that I am well versed in these topics and find myself bringing them up in random conversations because I find burial practices and the funeral industry in general so very fascinating.

[@iamloved223]

I would love to read your paper if it's available. I'm writing a similar one for my final English essay assignment.

[@TheKleinmeisie]

We recently had a tv show in Ireland discuss Aquamation, and it ended with a woman deciding it was the option she wanted for her own death plan, and as a result my mum looked into it and has decided she wants it too. It's not all doom and gloom!

[@aine965]

Wait, is it legal here?

[@avacx]

What show was it ?

[@MissMarchHare]

My dad (and birthday buddy) passed away 2 weeks ago. Thanks to you we called around for "a direct cremation, all inclusive" my mother & sister did opt to get all my siblings & I a pendant with ashes, but for now the majority of his ashes rest in my mom's room for her to join him, when we will spend our money on a joint celebration of their lives. Thank you for helping our, not well off family, not get cheated & gave my mother the power to plan that celebration for them.

[@ragnkja]

Sorry for your loss.

[@stefani.m.1987]

Wow! That sounds beautiful but I’m so very sorry for your loss!

[@amandajohnson2302]

I'm sorry for your loss. I was at that exact point two months ago, and Caitlins videos helped me too. The funeral home we went with was so awesome. They were the most affordable, but the funeral director cut a lock of my dad's hair for me, put some of his ashes in a small urn my cousin had, and I even gave the funeral director a hug when I picked my dad up. I wish more funeral directors were like Caitlin and the one my dad had.

[@BohoStitcher]

I’m so sorry for your loss. We lost our dad last year, and I feel like I lost a limb. I get it. I bet these comments are one of Caitlin’s favorites. I get the distinct impression that your story is a prime example of why she started doing this, so I’m so glad you got the info that empowered your mama to ask clearly and directly for what she wanted!! 💞💞💞 Sending you all the love and healing you can handle to get through the time ahead! 🥰🥰

[@garylefevers]

So sorry for your loss of your fine father.

[@cheshirehancock4752]

Thank you for making these videos. My mother died early Thursday morning, and it's only thanks to your videos I've known what to do. I found an aquamation facility in my mom's home-state (North Carolina; I was a little shocked it's legal in this backwater hellhole of a state but I'm still bitter over HB2 because I'm trans and was in this cursed state when that debacle happened so my view of this place might be skewed), it's a little further than I'd wanted to have her transported but I think she would've wanted it, she wanted to be cremated but also loved the environment and I think she would be happy about it, plus it's cheaper overall than any of the other options (contrary to what one person said at one funeral home her boyfriend and I visited since we decided to look at all our options, I suspect either the person was misinformed or had outdated info but part of me can't help but be a little skeptical of whether or not it might have been a direct lie). The man who runs the aquamation facility was very kind and we actually talked about you a little since you're a supporter of aquamation and I've been watching your channel for a few years now and always eagerly look forward to every new video. Watching and re-watching your videos has helped me sort out my thoughts on what to do and reminded me that I can always opt out of the expensive and stressful parts of funeral culture, she would never have wanted a formal funeral anyway since she was always more of a fun-loving and informal person. We're probably going to end up having a memorial later down the road, perhaps at some point next year, possibly around her birthday, because planning is a nightmare right now, and I think it's solely because of you I actually have the knowledge of that kind of option, the idea of doing more of this stuff at home is a relief to me as a more private and anxious person.

[@amentco8445]

Backwater hellhole?

[@cheshirehancock4752]

​@@amentco8445 I mean, it's "northern" only in its geographical relation to South Carolina and points further south, I would know, I had the misfortune of growing up there. Also are we really policing how people phrase things when said people are dealing with the death of a parent and all the bureaucratic BS that comes with that? Fun fact, IIRC, when I wrote the original comment, my mom was in limbo because the doctors hadn't given the funeral home what they needed despite it being after the time allotted to give a death certificate. And even if it was before that time elapsed, I'm 24 and was having to deal with the death of my mother, which happened rather suddenly and could have been prevented if the US wasn't such a shitty place with regards to healthcare, I think "backwater hellhole" is fairly mild in those circumstances. Probably not the words I'd use now as I'm trying to move away from the word "Hell" as I have grown fond of the goddess Hel in my grieving, but I don't think I said anything wrong, all things considered.

[@mackerel9875]

hope youre doing well

[@Solace6428]

I love the credits song so much. I don't know why more comments aren't at least mentioning it. The time and effort that was put into that is insane, just for one video, too? That's not a short song.

[@helenr4300]

Agree it was brilliant

[@principesa.della.notte69]

Second this. May his name live forever in infamy, immortalized in satirical song.

[@kathrynd5158]

Please don't sell the Golden button award. You earned that thing fair and square! Side note: It was totally worth staying for all the credits.

[@drasco61084]

Maybe it's like an F U to Google/KZbin for how they're treating creators.

[@bronxbearbud272]

And it looks like it would be a lot more uncomfortable than an Oscar statuette...

[@john-michaellelievre6118]

The proceeds from it are going to a good cause, and I imagine Caitlin gets a little sick feeling looking at them now after how KZbin has treated her. I'd love to see John Oliver get hold of it and do a segment on Last Week Tonight.

[@ecentricbirdlady]

@@john-michaellelievre6118 Have been away for a while after 9 people close to me, including both parents, died in 8 months. Where can I learn more about how KZbin has treated Kaitlin, and if she is leaving not only CA but KZbin. TY.

[@SwimmingInSunlight]

@@ecentricbirdlady she made a video about it recently

[@triciaboo1204]

We choose cremation for my momma, and scattered her in a private peice of beach in Florida with permission. She loved the beach at sunset so we as a family took her out at sunset, told story's,some prayed, and my sister provided the shots of her favorite fireball whiskey. It was beautiful and she would have loved it. I want to extend a thank you to Caitlin since she helped (along with an attack my mom survived) get the conversation rolling. ❤️ We had a plot up here for her but the environmental damage and heavy cost to fly her body home to Ohio just never sat right with her and I'm glad she had the foresight to tell me and her husband this so when she passed unexpectedly from pneumonia and sepsis suddenly Sept 6th we got to work right away with her wishes and her pension.

[@triciaboo1204]

This all got my fiance to finally tell me his wishes (he is so scared of death that he won't even talk about his wishes) now I know since I took notes and had him sign it at the bottom so no family would complain about it and had his dad read it and talk to him about it so I had a second very important person who knew I was doing everything to his son's wishes. We will be going into do living wills and whatnots soon to make it legally recognized but I wanted the notes in case since you truly never know.

[@tarantulawearingjordans190]

sounds like you guys remembered her with the utmost respect and reverence possible, she definitely appreciates everything you guys did

[@diegowilson9711]

I'm sorry for your loss, but glad your mom was able to do things the way she wanted to...

[@tarapayne4945]

We did the same, and my mom is in Lake Superior, via a boat ride out to ‘sea’❤A Hummingbird joined us!

[@AK-dw8jo]

I am confused about the pension bit? Sorry for your loss btw

[@dz7871]

Hi Caitlin! I also work in the death care industry, and am pro-aquamation (as well as green burial and composting). I appreciate your informative videos, and love your dark humor. Just ordered several copies of your books, to give as Xmas gifts this year. Let's spread the word of the good death, this holiday season! 💚❤💀💚❤

[@AlmightyRawks]

Hi Caitlyn, I am not sure if you will read this. I just got a job at a funeral company and having followed your channel for several years has helped me to go ahead with this. You, your channel, and your content have been inspirational in their style, attitude and interesting content. Thank you very much!

[@ravinraven6913]

I am gonna say no, shes not....but that shouldn't matter for now, good for you dude. Do what makes you feel...something. Hopefully it won't leave your heart too stiff when it comes to dealing with the living.

[@charitykingsley7632]

Can I just say that I clapped and cheered when you announced that human composting was finally made legal in California? Thank you Caitlin and team for all you do to spread awareness on death care!

[@serenitygilles7064]

Looks like I'm moving back home to Cali that's great news!

[@juliettedemaso7588]

Omg seriously!!!! This woman is such a force for excellence, compassion, and agency.

[@germyw]

I cried happy tears, for some reason. Lol

[@katla_phc]

It’s legal but can’t begin for a couple years (so if you’re in CA and want to be composted, wait to die lol)

[@katla_phc]

@@BeingLifted you’re misunderstanding-human composting did pass into law (bill signed around the end of September/beginning of October), but it will not go into effect until 2027. Look up CA bill AB351 for the official details.

[@WobblesandBean]

Thanks, Dick. We really appreciate you doing everything you can to prevent affordable, eco friendly means of putting your loved ones to rest, Dick. Great job on that one, Dick.

[@JorgensZelda]

@Nic DeGrave That man definitely decided to live up to his name for sure.

[@chloe5275]

@@JorgensZelda Yup self fulfilling prophecy I guess lol

[@bandashee]

How do you get Dick from Richard? Ask nicely. In Indiana, you just need to be a conflict of his interest.

[@verycool2050]

Does his name make you hungry?

[@brenda5511]

Way to go, Dick, way to go.

[@ox8833]

As a Hoosier I’m ashamed. This type of person who has special interest should be put in jail and not aloud anywhere near public office.

[@Jonathan.D]

Well at least you're not an Oakie or a Jayhawk. Go Sooners... yes please go, go far far away.😂

[@jwenting]

without funding from special interests it's impossible to get elected anywhere, for anything. Only difference is is whether it's your special interest being served or someone else's...

[@jameseverett9037]

Allowed. ~ Spelling Nazi

[@ravinraven6913]

thats half of the USA.....

[@NeverZitrone]

we should raise people to take office who can't own anything and can't reproduce just to make sure that there is no corruption in the future of governments

[@chokersandcardigans]

So I spoke to my parish priest about aquamation a couple weeks ago. Since it (aquamation) is currently an emerging technology, the Church is willing to seek clarification. Right now, yes, they are against it. BUT they were against cremation at first as well but did eventually come around, so there is hope.

[@kinsmart7294]

I don't think aquamation will be allowed because it appears as pantheism, naturalism or even nihilism. It also makes it impossible to put the remains in an sacred place(cemetery, shrine or church). Check the CDF instruction "Ad resurgendum cum Christo"

[@funnyvalentinesglorioushai2227]

What does that mean concretely? Are the people that got cremated before they change their mind in hell?

[@chokersandcardigans]

@@funnyvalentinesglorioushai2227 they are not in hell; the church just didn't understand the technology or reasons for cremation.

[@chardelfleming2271]

Weirdly enough the topic of death and bodies came up in conversation among my kids.. fast forward less than a year .. my youngest son was killed at the age 18... As a family we decided to go with aquamation as he had expressed his horror of bugs eating him. I had never heard of the process until it was given as an option. The process was a bit more expensive than cremation but for the reasons you stated it was a much better option for the environment and faster too. My brother was also aquamated at the same facility at the same time. He had been found deceased shortly after my son was killed. Totally unrelated though as he passed before my son. Rough time for all of us needless to say. As far as I'm concerned people should have every and all options open to us. We should not have political, religious or secular interference with what happens to our bodies when we go.

[@poddy6530]

X

[@ZephyrinSkies]

That sounds terrible to have 2 tragedies at the same time. I hope it wasn't violent, and that either way you and your family are doing ok.

[@projectionv.accountability1010]

I'm so sorry to hear about those tragedies... A great reminder to discuss the things that aren't fun.

[@andsoitgoes1142]

So sorry about your tragic losses. Thank you for sharing the information.

[@jewelmathews1408]

I am so sorry for your losses.

[@savannahgrace111]

Just wanted to let you know, I am currently writing a paper on the exploitation of the funeral industrial complex and better alternatives to the North American funeral because of you. So thank you, because "I wanna be composted" is now a catchphrase of mine and I have become a deathcare justice die-hard now.

[@larissac9598]

Let us know when you get it published, I for one would certainly like to read it!

[@kyrafreeman8152]

Please let us know when your finished!!!

[@redbloodedbutterfly]

I'd be curious if taxpayer money is being used to support the funeral industrial complex. For example, when local governments disperse funeral funds to families, based on the cause of death of their relative, what strings, if any, are attached? Another example: When an American solider dies overseas, how much say does the family have about what is done with the body before and during transport?

[@rae5602]

I'm doing something similar! Part of my EPQ: are traditional funeral practises detrimental to the environment and what are the greener alternatives? All because of finding this channel ☺☺

[@katrinascarlet5637]

I made it a point to talk to my husband about what he wants so I'm not put in a bad spot while grieving. Turns out he could not care less about what I do with his body with the exception of being burried in a box. I even joked about making him into a necklace and he was like "Sounds cool, do it if you want but I swear I WILL haunt you if you put me in a box."

[@dianauwu1312]

As an Indiana resident, get used to it. We once had a bill nearly pass to legally round Pi to 3.2. A brave math professor from Purdue University happened to be present and intervened, thank gods.

[@triagonlover]

Wtf… do I dare ask why they were trying to do that? Glad the bill was stopped though

[@awzthemusicalreviews]

As soon as a politician says, "You can tell I feel very passionate about this", you just know there's money involved.

[@michelledG7075]

I had my 19 year old son cremated. My husband said " I am not going to put my son in the ground". I feel we made the right decision for our family. This is a personal decision for each family and it is wrong for anyone to try to talk family's out of what they want and are comfortable with. I hate that all things seem to come down to money.

[@katrinascarlet5637]

I know if I outlive my husband it's going to be such an argument with his mother. He doesn't care what happens to his body he just REFUSES to be burried in a box. I just know his mother is going to raise hell about him not being burried with his son along the rest of the family. I'll have the last say as his wife but that doesn't mean I won't get hell for sticking to his wishes.

[@lbatemon1158]

Only in American culture 😥 Capitalistic societies thrive on greed. No parent should have to outlive their child, I am so sorry for your loss.

[@ragnkja]

@@katrinascarlet5637 Whether the two of you decide on a natural burial with just a shroud and no casket or aqua- or cremation and burying the osseous remains, there are options that don’t involve burying a preserved cadaver in a box.

[@katrinascarlet5637]

@@ragnkja I considered the body farm in Texas. They put out bodies in various ways to study decomp. He likes the idea of being useful but after their studies are done the bones are sorted into boxes so he's out. I might sign up my own body since I don't mind boxes. The Criminal podcast did an episode on the body farm if you're interested in how that goes.

[@Zoreta]

@@katrinascarlet5637 If it's the box that's the deal breaker, maybe consider a biodegradable urn. It would release his ashes back into the Earth, but if he wants to be buried with the family, he would get to do that too.

[@gozerthegozarian9500]

A Dutch company has developed a coffin made from de-hydrated mycelium, after burial, the moisture in the earth re-hydrates and re-activates the mycelium, which then devours the corpse in record time. It's supposed to be a super eco-friendly way of burial. Might be of interest to European Deathlings (I don't know if the company ships to the USA).

[@wingedyera]

That is super interesting to me. I think I might want that 🤔

[@animak757]

As a biologyst I worry of the Impact of non native funguses (the ones that make the mycelium) on the USA environment so I don't think it's a great idea to import the coffins unless the company develops differents ones for each local ecosistem

[@tookitogo]

@@animak757 That was my first thought, too, though I am not a biologist!

[@MooCowKris]

@@animak757 100%

[@gozerthegozarian9500]

@@animak757 good point!

[@jdaywork2693]

Caitlin, have you ever looked into Spring Grove Cemetery in Cincinnati? It's a really nice looking cemetery that was modeled to be like Pere La Chaise Cemetery in Paris and some other cemeteries in the east coast of the US. George Reeves was temporarily interred there, There are some monuments and mausoleums that have interesting designs like a mini Parthenon, a pyramid, a sphinx, beer barons with bust of their heads on their markers, and a bust that was supposed to have the eyes of its occupant in it so he could keep a look out.

[@vylbird8014]

I'd mount my casket on a hinge, so if someone stepped on one end the corpse would lift up and jump out at them.

[@moiradoyle1210]

Great video as always, my father has been ill for the majority of my life. Finding your channel years ago helped me be more comfortable with death. Unfortunately after declining rapidly over 12 days, my dad passed away at 67. His wishes were for his body to be donated to Harvard as his parents were. However, because of the covid he tested positive for 2 days before his passing. I wanted to use aquamation but it wasn’t an option and he needed to be cremated.☹️ I kindly shared your video with the funeral director as she seemed intrigued! Thank you for years of free therapy in form of your KZbin videos. I adore you. I’m case you see this, a suggestion, the Venzone mummies seem fascinating.

[@k.a.u.4599]

My grandpa died this month in his 90s and I have him to thank for my early exposure to green death options. I remember him following aquamation in science journals when I was a kid and talking about it! He got cremated for eco-friendly and personal reasons but family history is important to him so he'll also be buried next to my grandma. Another fun fact about him, he helped NASA send carrots to space!

[@chunellemariavictoriaespan8752]

Wait what??? THAT'S DANG COOL!!!

[@avadakedavra2722]

Sorry for your and our loss. This generation is alas a fading treasure, my grandmother was incredible too.

[@BohoStitcher]

@@avadakedavra2722 It is a loss, they all are. But, they passed on their “amazingness,” even if it manifests in different ways. I am constantly amazed and awed by the passion, care, and enthusiasm of the generations coming up. “The kids are alright.” And all those grandmas and grandpas are a big reason why that’s true! 💞💞

[@grmpEqweer]

One small carrot for man, one giant leap for mankind.

[@bowdlerise]

just flush me down the toilet

[@cubbiescorner190]

I chose Aquamation for my dear dog that had been with us for 14 years. He passed last October. When the vet first told us his time was short l remembered seeing the first video you did on Aquamation and started a search to see if it was in my area. It was! For pets. By the time Petey died 6 months later, they were doing humans as well. It was such an interesting experience. The owner met us at the vets office on that dreadful day and immediately took Petey into his care. A few days later we were told we could come pick him up. We received him in a beautiful bamboo urn along with his paw print and a lock of his hair. His ashes were white and clean…no charcoal grey. The owner then offered to give us a tour of the facility since there were currently no bodies in the room. One of the more fascinating things we were told is that the local public works officials, responsible for inspecting them, commented during their licensing that he was impressed because the water going out was cleaner than the water they were taking in. Overall, it was much nicer than any cremation I’ve ever done before, simply because it seemed so gentle and peaceful. Thank you for educating all of us on our alternatives for death care! And yes, I’ve made my death plan!

[@dabooser1048]

I had no idea that aquamation was available for pets. Unfortunately my buddy (dog) is getting quite old and frail and I know he won't live forever. You have inspired me to make plans for the dreaded day. I don't want to make a bad decision when that day comes because I'm too upset to think clearly. So sorry for the loss of your Petey, I know how bad it hurts.

[@krisniznik3953]

I chose this for my dog too. The vet came to the house and then brought her to the water crematorium. Her urn came back with a lock of her hair, a paw print, and her microchip. I don't really want to know how they got that. She's in the back yard where she was happy.

[@TheYoghurt42]

I imagine the microchip would naturally be left, along with the bones, at the end of the aquamation process because it's not organic.

[@Anh3d0n14]

Caitlyn, can I call you Caitlyn? I've been watching your videos for a long time now, it feels like we're past the whole 'maam' phase. I really enjoy your content. It's helped me come to terms with some things that have happened in my life, vis a vis the dead in my life, and at the same time been incredbly entertaining. The audiobook of 'Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs' was amazeballs, if I'm allowed to say that, and I've tried like hell to share it with friends. You keep doing you girl and I'll keep watching.

[@bushelapeck1501]

I love your channel, Caitlin & have you to thank for educating me in my options & making the "what are they gonna do with my body after i'm done with it" thing less scary. I so wish i'd known these options when my stepmother passed away in 2010, then my dad six months later & $25,000 collectively, later! I've told my family my green burial wishes (dressed in a cotton gown, put into a seagrass basket & buried) & told my stepdaughter that it isn't legal yet in my state of KY. She said, that's ok, we'll take you where it is.

[@CPAJESS1980]

We used Water Cremation for my Dad earlier this year and honestly the company was far more compassionate and kind during the process. They did not have the motivation to upsell for things we didn't want or need. The fact that it was better for the environment was very much in line with his wishes. It also seemed a little less violent than traditional Cremation. I'm going to do the same when it's my time. So glad Colorado made this legal!

[@ZILOGz80VIDEOS]

The fact that some salesghouls will go out of their way to make the mourning experience into a hellish negotiation buying a car style is so awful. Imagine if your job was to direct people though one of the lowest points of their life and using it as a chance to go full Best Buy salesperson on them. Gross.

[@mikesharkey2010]

As a Boy Scout of (many) years past, and a Boy Scout leader for many a year and a day, and a lover of nature, active in Leave No Trace - I have been enthusiastically in favor of Aquamation since first learning about it from Caitlin 's videos. I have been astonished that it has not been the immediate first (or second ) choice for Christians - with so many of the powerful images of "fires of hell" and "burning for eternity" compared to images of "washing away ones sins" and "immersion baptism - being reborn with a new body/soul", We're I so inclined to begin a business in the funerary field, this would be my choice. Good marketing by discussions with local churches, pointing out these "selling points", not to mention the lower costs for their elderly or financially challenged members, and the declining space available in cemeteries. Have some tasteful urns available, perhaps with favored scenes (gardens, hunting, sport team logos, . . . Okay perhaps not all of them the genteel good taste of a faux ming vase, but . .)

[@michellegray7892]

@Jessica Keene How long did the aquamation take though (i am trying to find the time frame between it versus cremation) and what was the cost difference? Seems like it would be a good deal more expensive given everything that has to go into it, just for the processing of the decomp part alone. anyone here who knows offhand? Yes I can google, but what is pulling up for me is mainly about the legalities and bizarre ads that are not relevant so hoping someone here might be able to give me a bit more knowledge and since you mentioned you had this done, figured you might have some first hand insight into this?

[@CPAJESS1980]

@@michellegray7892 I'm a little bleary on the time frame and exact cost but I know it wasn't more than a month from when he passed to when his remains were back to us. On the cost I did not pay for it but the provider (Be A Tree) was way more upfront with pricing than anything else I could find. We did not do a traditional service so none of that was needed and they were amazingly respectful throughout. They even asked us about Dad's favorite music so they could have a Playlist going while he was processing. I had seen and heard so many horror stories about funeral homes that this was refreshing during one of the worst things I'd ever been through.

[@michellegray7892]

@@CPAJESS1980 I am very glad to hear it went so smoothly, though I am truly very sorry for your loss. When my mother passed suddenly she did not have life insurance so for cost reasons the cremation was the route we went. It was faster than the aquamation you mentioned (she passed on a Sunday and the ashes were ready to be return to us on Wednesday morning). However-they refused to hand over her remains unless the cremation cost was in full upfront. They wanted 2500 USD on the spot. I was younger and working full time but for minimum wage when this happened, so I had to rely on the kindness of extended family and friends just to get her remains turned over to me as they were not willing to set up any sort of payment plan. Now it is true she should of had life insurance and I had pushed her to get one just for basic coverage and nothing more, but she didn't. I don't blame them for wanting some of it upfront as a sign of good faith it would be paid... but not willing to work with me at all and basically hold her remains for ransom really added insult to injury.

[@PickledSaltwater]

As someone who works in state government, I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to reach out directly to your state legislators. Find the person who would be most interested in what you’re advocating and find the best contact information for them, either via Twitter, email, phone numbers, or even meeting in person. Thank you for talking about your process with California and spreading awareness for the importance of local advocacy and lobbying!

[@thomasvlaskampiii6850]

May I ask what state you're in?

[@john2g1]

@@thomasvlaskampiii6850 PickledSaltwater... Hmmm sounds like a southern coastal state. This is a total guess but I'm going to go with Louisiana.

[@thomasvlaskampiii6850]

@@john2g1 You might be right. Though it could also be Florida. In my mind, pickled seawater sounds like a brackish swamp. Which sounds beyond unpleasant

[@ShannonLH1108]

I've done this but I always get a scripted email or a phone call from a staffer. Not once have I gotten an actual personal acknowledgement from a legislator.

[@TheRealChem]

I have been watching your videos for years. I actually wanted to become a mortician but my own life circumstances and choices led me down a different path. A week and two days ago my wife of seven years past away. Despite being legally married for several years we have known each other for 20ish years. I am having a really hard time with her death. We both knew it would happen eventually since she was sick. When it happened it still turned my life upside down. She was my best friend and my e everything. We used to talk about her death and what she wanted. I had her cremated. She often joked that I should eat a tiny bit of her ashes once I get them back. I know she was serious though. So I did just that today. I got her ashes back a few days ago. I did a small like 1/2 tablespoon and chased it with water. Chunky! I had to keep drinking to get the hard pulverized bone down my gullet. I have no shame in this. She was my world. What I do want to know is your opinion of this action. Do you support the wishes of recently passed wanting their spouce to ingest them? To make them part of their body in some way forever? Or am I just crazy since she has passed

[@NotSoNormal1987]

This honestly sounds kinda sweet to me. The idea of her joining you even in death. Some tribes in Papua new guinnie would consume the dead. But there was a problem with prion diseases. I imagine the cremation process makes that a non issue. I personally like the idea of turning my loved ones into diamonds and wearing them. They could stay close to me in that way. And I like the idea of them being something beautiful even with their loss. I don't think there is a wrong way to grieve the loss of a loved one. How we handle their remains should be tailored to the individual. I've heard of people mixing ashes with paint and making portraits with the remains.

[@MelissaSchwartz143]

I’m so glad you’re still posting! Your videos help me cope with the idea of death so much and you’re so pleasant and goofy!

[@warmcoldcuts]

My grandma chose aquamation for herself as a better environmental option. I love people looking out for the planet even after they’re gone :)

[@kissthesky40]

The planet is fine.

[@sigisig3941]

Hope that it one day comes to germany too. I like that Idea alot too. You grandma rocked.

[@maddie19]

My immediate family all wants to be made into trees. It’s great for the environment because you’re planting a tree and your body will decompose into the earth, but you can still get the idea of being buried somewhere if your family visits their deceased loved ones in a cemetery.

[@AuskaDezjArdamaath]

My grandpa went with aquamation because it was cheapest and he was a miser. 😆

[@KB-ql8cx]

@@kissthesky40 sure, if you think climate change, deforestation and extinction for many animals is “fine” then sure

[@Slikx666]

Caitlin. I just wanted to say thank you for educating me over the years about what happens after we die. On the 20th of October I left my boyfriend's flat with my support worker (Heather), I was gone about 40 minutes and parted with my support worker outside and when I entered the flat I found my boyfriend passed away on his sofa. I rang 999 (UK) , my support worker and shouted help all at the same time, the upstairs neighbor arrived and couldn't find any pulse, heather arrived and we tried to get him in a position to try CPR. Due to his weight we had no chance of doing anything, the ambulance crew arrived and pronounced him dead. The autopsy found he had passed away due to a blood clot, thankfully it was instant and he wouldn't have known anything. After a week I found myself at piece with how he went, he always wanted to go quickly. Me and Rob (his cousin) have been doing a lot of work, Rob has been doing the paperwork side of things and I've been sorting out his flat. He's got a brother in the US, but there's very little he can do practically but it's good to talk to him. We've spoken to the funeral director and have cut out as much as possible to save money. We thought about a cardboard coffin but due to his size' and weight it wasn't an option, so we went with the cheapest coffin instead. Now comes something that we didn't expect, he's too big for a standard sized coffin. 🙄 So now he's in a plus sized. We had booked for the service and cremation to happen at a cemetery but the coffin won't fit in the retort, so we're having the service at another cemetery and he'll be having one last road trip 40 miles away to a place they can deal with the coffin. 🙂 The music will be Evanescence - My Immortal, My Ruin - Morning Prayer and Victoria Wood - The Ballad of Barry and Freda. I'll be scattering his ashes next to his mum and his two dogs on Dartmoor, Devon, England. It's another promise I made to him. We loved each other but we both have depression and anxiety disorders that made things awkward at times. He had issues with his legs and couldn't walk very far, I looked after his legs and feet. But now he's at peace, no longer in plain or discomfort and reunited with his mum. I'll be getting my first tattoo for him, I really don't like needles but I'll do it for him. We'd known each other for 40 years and been together for 25 years. I'll miss him, I'll cry, but I need to carry on. His food from the flat have gone to a foodbank. His medical supplies are going to Ukraine. The 10 plus pairs of unused shoes are going to charity. The wool that he was knitting will be used to raise money for helping people. Some things will be sold and used to pay for his funeral. If any of his possessions can save a life then we're making sure it goes to the right place. Having some medical knowledge and the basic understanding of how the funeral service works has help me so much. Kaitlin, thank you for helping me. I'm doing ok. ♥️🙂👍

[@aine965]

I'm so sorry for your loss ❤ It sounds like you handled everything amazingly and with so much common sense.

[@mikki3961]

I'm sorry for your loss. You are doing amazing things by helping others. I hope you are doing well.

[@Slikx666]

@@mikki3961 I'm ok, I've got a good support network around me and I'm busy with his flat and service. I miss him every day but I'll see him when it's my turn. Thank you. 🙂

[@Slikx666]

@@aine965 Thank you. I wish the common sense part of my brain would go away for a while, then I could have a good cry. 🙂👍

[@aine965]

@@Slikx666 All I can say is give yourself the time and grace you deserve ❤❤

[@gregkral4467]

These are such fascinating topics, thank you for all you do.

[@crisymakesnoise]

Thanks to Caitlyn, when my beloved cat recently passed, I was able to get him aquamated as a final bath🖤

[@frenchfry4310]

I really hate when these people get to choose what I want for my death plan. They can choose how they want their final wishes. DO NOT tell me how I get to process my body, it's MY choice, MY wish, MY body. When they pay my death bill then they can choose, but if it's my money, or my family's, they can stay the heck out of it. Much respect to you Kaitlyn for all that you do. I tell all of my friends about your channel and that they should watch and inform themselves as well as talk with their families so that they can make better plans for when that moment comes.

[@bobloblaw9679]

i *100%* would volunteer my body for caitlynmation. i sort of half wanted to end up like one of those concrete geese on people's porches that they dress up every season in different festive outfits.

[@PastelBat]

Ironically the only porch geese I've ever seen have belonged to funeral homes

[@thatgirljames6635]

I'm so grateful to have found you and I'm so grateful for all your hard work Kaitlyn! Keep it up!we support you!

[@darlenelane9682]

I absolutely love your witty videos and wish you had a lot more on KZbin... Great job.

[@CortexNewsService]

Caitlin: "Do NOT Dick Hamm for his name." Proceeds to roast Dick for 20 minutes. Love your channel. This was perfection.

[@simonnachreiner8380]

I mean it technically isn't ad hominem

[@thexalon]

Actually, she didn't roast him, she dissolved him in an alkaline solution.

[@classicambo9781]

Loved the song at the end

[@lisah-p8474]

He is runner up to Nascar driver Dick Trickle for funniest Dick name. But Dick Hamm is definitely a dick ham.

[@darcieclements4880]

He should count his blessings it hasn't turned into prosecution for conflict of interest because he would be a very clear cut case to make an example of.

[@chrisrelhard]

"it's just not human" is such a wild statement to make. innovative new ways to face a problem and give more options seems like the most human you can get. and "grandma soup with bones smashed via hammer" sounds pretty on par with how you could describe most other funeral practices. grandma bbq, grandma getting her juices replaced with chemicals and prettied up, grandma getting eaten by worms, etc.

[@pilgrimpoet]

I am really grateful you are educating people so much about caring for the dead and their families. And doing so in such a human, humorous way. So glad I found you and your organization!

[@SilenceAngelx]

Hi Caitlyn, just wanted to come back to this video and say thanks. A little pet aquamation business opened in my town around the same time this video came out and without this video I wouldn't have known what the place was. We unfortunately had to put my cat down a couple weeks ago and the vets offered us brochures for a couple traditional cremation places but they were all at least an hour out of town. I hated the idea of her needing to travel that far or (in worst circumstances) having to go through the mail and get lost. We ended up calling the aquamation place and they've been SO kind and helpful and I feel so much better she went somewhere close by so I can go pick her up as soon as she's ready to come home. Without this video I probably wouldn't have considered it as an option (because I didn't know what it was!) Unfortunately I don't think it's available for people in my area yet, but it's definitely an option I'll consider for myself if it does!

[@mcfarofinha134]

I'm a mortuary science student at cyprus cc (your alma mater) and let me say, you've grown somewhat of a legend status among quite a lot of my fellow students. Thanks for helping a good death become an option for more and more people each day

[@ozok17]

this is so encouraging to hear.

[@akiyamada2306]

Thank you for shedding light on Native issues surrounding death and dying...it has been so hard the last few years and I know our voices are often unheard.

[@kts8900]

Congratulations on your hard work. Thank you for discussing your journey.

[@dogteeeth]

i love watching your videos so much. my close friend recommended me your book smoke gets in your eyes and that was my introduction to you, ive been enthralled ever since. its so refreshing to see another person whos take on death isnt so black and white when it comes to the way we should let ourselves go or even just the way we view it. you and the things you have to say in midnight gospel.. its one of my favorite episodes. my close friend and i often talk about the way we'd love to give our bodies back to the earth, whether it be in the forest becoming mushrooms or in the ocean as a vessel for life to continue on. returning to nature has always been an important motif i think in both of our death desires, many people would probably not understand, but it feels nice to be heard and seen by the select few who do understand. even in our deaths, we deserve the decision of how to eternally rest..and for us, we find comfort in living on in the lives of mushrooms or fish or whatever consumes us, theres something morbidly beautiful in that..

[@maleahlock]

Just sitting up tonight next to my little cat's body with the window wide open to the stars and night breeze, candles, just-baked ginger muffins, and this most promising video. It's a natural burial for our familys most constant and loving companion. RIP Blake.

[@bunhelsingslegacy3549]

I'm so sorry for your loss. - random internet stranger who's also lost cherished pets

[@mikki3961]

Oh so sorry on the loss of Blake. Our pets are family and dearly loved.

[@AJToad]

Oh dear. So sorry for your loss. Rest easy, Blake

[@enitachipoyi1377]

rip Blake. felt sad reading your post act him. i have 2 cats and can't imagine this

[@cherylgraves7382]

Rip Blake. 😞

[@imatugwaddle2291]

I think I speak for MILLIONS of people when I say, "WE LOVE YOU, CAITLIN!!!" and PLEASE keep making these videos!!!!!

[@belindaheydenrych5943]

👍👍

[@cocacola4blood365]

@@belindaheydenrych5943 Hear hear!!!

[@Joani161]

You are entertaining, not dry & banal, which is good, as it helps your message come across. I like the information you provide!

[@davidvilla827]

I just stumbled upon your channel and I have to admit it's the best thing on KZbin thank you so much

[@rainyday7126]

I don’t leave comments often but I just wanted to thank you for always putting subtitles on your videos, accessibility is so important and a lot of creators do not acknowledge it. I’m not deaf and I can perfectly hear but I’m French and even though I understand English most of the time, subtitles help me a lot to better understand what is said, especially for words that are not often used in everyday life like "aquamation" haha I’ve been watching your videos for a while now and I love your work ! Once again, thank you ❤️ Love from France

[@jadeturtledesigns]

Pp

[@blumeshullman8002]

same here

[@DeliaLee8]

Similar for me. Not deaf but an older person who processes a little slower nowadays. I use subtitles whenever available - watching movies, TV shows and, of course, KZbin videos. Staying in the loop is so important for maintaining brain function as well as enjoying what I am watching.

[@michellesotelo-mercer7797]

Not gonna lie, I actually shed a joyful tear when you mentioned that aquamation was finally legalized, and then shed another joyful tear when composting was legalized... I know how hard you all fought for these options, I'm so happy for your state (hopefully every state has them legalized or soon will)... I'm north in Ontario Canada, and currently looking into greener options for myself

[@chrissy24-7]

I'll talk with my mom about this! 💜 Update: it's not legal in our state. But I can use a cremation that plants a tree with every funeral. I wish it weren't so but Mom can't be dissuaded.

[@ame8533]

I am SUCH a fan of this channel!! Infact, I sent your video of human composting to my mom and now she wants that as her final plans; as do I for myself. Death as always seemed a bit scary to me, the process of dying but the aftermath of just being in nature and growing plants sounds....beyond heavenly. Thank you for ALL that you do for the death industry and us lay-people who want to know more!! Keep being amazing!!

[@itsmadeofwaffles]

My dog died last month, I was with her until her last breath and while deciding what to do with her body I chose to fulfill her wish and bury her by the tree in our backyard, she had spent her last days over there and the previous night to her departure she had already started to dig a hole, whats greener than that? so that's the place were she rest now. I remembered what you said about making sure everyone gets involved in the burial process, so we all helped to find a box to place her, dig the hole and cover it, in the end we were sad but calm because we understood that it was her time to go. I still feel a deep pain when thinking about her absence but thanks to your videos I feel like I was able to process things better, I learnt how to understand death and the grieve that comes with it, so thank you.

[@mikam8801]

😢

[@TheLadybughug]

So sorry for your loss. 😥❤️

[@actsnfacts]

I had a dog best friend for 14 years; it was so hard to lose her too. It was just me and her, nobody to take to the burial with me, but one of my best human friends showed up for support. Fortunately, I lived in the country and there were plenty of places to bury her. I was oriented not to bury too deep. In fact, as superficially as possible, so that the body could be easily consumed by macro and micro fauna and fungi, as well as the final decomposition being done by the aerobic bugs, not the foul smell and harsh chemical producing ones. But that is unfortunately not a luxury we modern society dwelling humans can afford...

[@dzr4421]

So sorry for your loss.

[@SasquachPL]

My family also buried our lil doggie in our garden. It's nice having that place with a pretty bush growing as his 'gravestone'. I always wanted to be buried with a tree planted on top of me, so my particles end up as part of it, like a kinda reincarnation. And then the people I leave can have something living and natural to come visit and maybe even hug if they feel that need::)

[@amagab2346]

I’m glad you are sticking it out on You tube. You are a valuable and effective voice. The documentary was amazing

[@lazerbearicorn7068]

Caitlyn thank you so much for all the amazing information you share. Because of your videos I have made a decision that I very much want to be composted and have shared my wishes with my son.

[@annek311]

So cool that you inform us on death and funeral stuff and also small to medium scale corruption! Yaye for the investigative mortician and crew! 👍👍👍

[@RedPanda79]

Watching these videos got me interested in this. I then learned it was illegal in the Netherlands. I joined a group pushing for it and now in 2023 it will be allowed!

[@crains8087]

awesome!

[@billycathcart]

“ Me and my bangs. “ That line still cracks me up. I appreciate your self deprecating humor Caitlin !

[@lauramoesbergen468]

Thanks for leading the way on these topics. In my country we can use aquamation for our pets, but not for humans just yet. I hope this will come available soon. This would be a huge step forward. Next step composting which I would prefer, although I think that is probably still years away. Keep setting these good examples and hopefully the rest of the world will follow.

[@bridge909]

I had a really rough day and just the fact that one day I’ll get to die and someone like her will be so kind and put me in the ground brings me peace thank you.

[@AnnieE2013]

I'm a resident of Indiana, and JFC I hate the ignorance of my state so much. On a happier note, I am overjoyed that you've decided to post more vids on KZbin!!! I cannot imagine how frustrating it is sometimes, but you do so much good and, frankly, we need you doing the work you do (no pressure or anything. Sorry.). Love you, and many, many *hugs*.

[@livyann2143]

I was like "yay this is going really well for Indiana". And then I was like "oh god never mind". I'm terminally ill and water cremation is ideal for me, as I want several loved ones to have access to my remains, which is much easier when you're uh... Bone dust. Easier to divy that up than some rotting corpse in the ground. Unfortunately I live in Indiana. So it's probably normal cremation for me after various body parts get sent off for research. However this has inspired me to get back into advocating for medicinal cannabis in Indiana.

[@thomasvlaskampiii6850]

Hello fellow Hoosiers! May I ask what part of Indiana you guys are from?

[@michelleberger6656]

@@livyann2143 as a fellow Hoosier with chronic illness (MS & POTS), I cannot agree more about medical cannabis. Thank God I’m only about 1 1/2 from Michigan. Have you ever looked into Marinol? It’s a THC prescription pill that is legal.

[@MiotaLee]

Then you do your best to replace the representatives that you disagree with ;)

[@Bitsy2019]

Also from Indiana and I want to know why we have so many damn casket companies! I grew up in a small town that manufactures 50 percent of the caskets in the US. About an hour away, there is another relatively large casket company. Neither of these were the ones opened by Dick.

[@cheriestolze]

Thank you for bringing this to us. Your hard work is not lost on me.

[@cherieeaton5576]

Nice name.

[@cheriestolze]

It’s fun to see fellow Cheries!

[@liamh4783]

I enjoy your edits. I also enjoy the way you explain things. Really informative.

[@monicanlamppost9631]

You know my favorite part of this video? The absolutely endless list of Patrons.

[@suzyh5874]

I so admire your tireless advocacy of differing ways to say goodbye our loved ones. And the humourous creativity in how you relay all these moments of frustration and difficulty trying to be heard. Sometimes laughing at the absurdity of it is the only way to get through to the next stage of the fight.

[@jaded_gerManic]

Well put! Seconded!

[@BuatAtiras1]

Please...PLEASE, do not sell off your KZbin award. Your videos are excellent and you obviously worked hard on them. You earned that award. Please keep it.

[@shalomhobbitess7509]

She still earned it and it's still a reality even if she doesn't hang onto the physical aspect of it. Someone who so regularly deals in human death probably has a deeper understanding of that sort of thing than most!

[@wordzmyth]

I am kinda amazed by selling it, but it puts my clutter life full of things I might need or be able to fix into perspective.

[@donaldharrill6265]

You deserve MORE awards

[@BohoStitcher]

@@wordzmyth Check out the Minimal Mom here on KZbin. She completely reshaped my perspective about “stuff.”

[@aethergasm]

Can I... can I volunteer for Caitlinmation? 🤣 My mother was a government worker in Canada for a public works department which includes water sanitation. Honestly, you could do whatever you want with the water that gets flushed down, it's all going to end up smelling the same. The only way I can explain it is like what Flynn Rider alluded in the Disney Tangled movie: it smells like brown. I don't see anything wrong with eventually just flushing our biological soup with the rest of our biological soup.🤷🏻‍♀️

[@Kai-Made]

@Caitlin aka @Ask a Mortician. I just ran across an episode of Midnight Gospel, episode 7 to be exact. I just had to say, I just love to hear your take on things...think it is amazing you are "death" on that show and you speak the truth. SO, cheers dear lady. Have a good one.

[@safetymikeengland]

The Smothers Brothers had a routine about their uncle, who owned a small winery; they said they had him cremated and put the ashes in the irrigation system, so "If you have some of our wine, there's a little bit of Uncle in there" or something of the sort. I always loved the Smothers Brothers.

[@tomrogers9467]

Yeah, but Mom always loved me best!

[@nickx1754]

While a lack of understanding can be very frustrating, I appreciate Caitlin's mention of how no one is a one-dimensional villian. Hamm's conflict of interest certainly seems to show him living up to his first name but many other people are simply leery of new things. Congratulations on aquamation and composting bills getting passed in California!! Thank you for all the good work Caitlin!

[@aphyngodiva2551]

I appreciated this viewpoint too, at the end of the day everyone is doing the best with what they currently know, it's not with the intention to make other people miserable (at least, hopefully...)

[@LawtonDigital]

@@aphyngodiva2551 I think it's pretty clear that Hamm was out to hinder free enterprise and in so doing enrich himself.

[@blackmonday738]

Ain't u tired of Old ass people running there mouths and our country!! I am! Look at our presidents.

[@anabeladavilla5462]

I love that you are talking about these newer forms of body disposal! I took a Sociology of Death and Dying class in college and got to plan my own funeral. I want to be recomposted, and it just became legal in my state!

[@DUKEofWAIL]

You are so entertaining and listenable! I like your varied styles of delivery. Sometimes, only sometimes, your videos are a little longer than I want to listen to at the moment. Carry on, I'm watching.

[@dydx8585]

When my grandmother died, my family suffered the most traumatising, patronising experience of their life when trying to organise her funeral, and how other families were treated at the office. They had no idea what their rights were and your channel has made me so much more comfortable with not just dealing with the industry and what I want, but has also made me so much more comfortable with death. It gave me such a good perspective to go into my medical degree, and my mother loves you as well. Thank you for everything ❤

[@maryannbannister5829]

Caitlin I love your talks. Luckily in South Africa we have so many different religions with their own burial rituals that I think our legislators would rather boil their own heads in hot oil before they interfere. The Bish - Bishop Tutu - was an amazing person and a whole lot of people in South Africa have opted for aquamation once we learnt what it was from him.

[@karenwoodward7291]

I love your presentations! Thanks for the info.

[@reginanazarkewich2288]

Giving options... especially greener options to people is wonderful. Good work!