ASMR for High-Value Men™

I'm just gonna come right out and say it. It's time to stop saying mean things about men. Without men society would collapse. Yet we sometimes treat them as if they are accountable for their own actions. Why?
Men, and high-value men in particular, need to sleep, and this is more difficult when the world is against you. So I invite all high-value men to use this video as an aid in attaining all your high-value goals by getting some high-value rest.
Regular men can watch it too if they want, but as with anything in life, you only get out of something what you put into it, so if your actions have shown you to be mid or low-value, I'm not sure what you'll get out of this.
Women and non-male identifying people, please be respectful and keep this a safe space for increasingly vilified and marginalized high-value men.

[@TheNitram8]

I'm persuaded a lot of people will not see that this is satire.

[@emreads]

That's what I thought. Waiting for the algorithm to pick this up on the wrong side of YT Edit: I should say, its still amazing content though!

[@evelyngarrison6007]

It took about 3 seconds...😂

[@emreads]

@@evelyngarrison6007 One day later and the comments aren't the worst but yeahhhhhh... props though because they ignored the video, description, and the entire rest of the channel as a whole for hints 😂

[@QuantumWalnut]

It's hard to tell because Sailor always has the Joel-face.

[@RocArio]

As a high value man, I take large offense to that.

[@droid0.1alpha89]

As a sigma-delta-alpha-theta-omega male, I'm so glad you've shared these words to help me assure myself. It is quite callousing to the mind when your mom doesn't make you the PB&J sandwiches she's supposed to, and that you REQUEST PERSONALLY.

[@PhoenicianSailor]

Really, the fact that the sandwiches had to be requested in the first place is a huge red flag. Would start mom-shopping, ASAP.

[@droid0.1alpha89]

@@PhoenicianSailor Will add this to today's to-do list. 👍

[@HazzCraft]

as a high value, straight, alpha, gigachad with a girlfriend. nothing makes me happier than being called sweetheart by a man of similar stature

[@PhoenicianSailor]

I'd suggest testing the integrity of your gigachadity with frequent omnisexual experiences. Please report back with results (detailed descriptions please, ideally written in first-person.)

[@RBTGT]

As a male-sympathetic person, let me say that I’m glad that someone is finally standing up for men. For SO long, men have been severely underrepresented in key areas of life such as media, politics, and FBI most wanted lists.

[@Uploaded1995]

"Who else will speak confidently about things they know very little about?" That's a summary right there folks.

[@nicinat0r]

I know someone is watching this from a jail in Romania :)

[@jatinbandhiwal1987]

😂😂😂😂

[@ihavenoname6119]

you reckon they gave him headphones?

[@PhoenicianSailor]

Dare to dream.

[@CharlieTheSupersaurus]

You win my "this week's comment of the week" award. Hahaha.

[@gregoryjones7712]

He's out now and it's looking like Romania was being completely reactionary and had no real case smh doesn't help your cause

[@DetergentBubbles2]

Can't believe it's been almost 5 years since the JP video; I was already subbed at the time but it's when I knew this channel was something special. Glad to see this spiritual successor!

[@thedawapenjor]

You are my first pick when it come to underrated youtubers. Not just an asmr creator but a youtuber.

[@oliviarendell2788]

Impeccable satire, excellent lighting --- I'm sure that glowing-eyed thumbnail will be creeping into the dreams of many "high-value men" after seeing this...

[@JestarPhoenix]

Handsome man, Handsome voice, Handsome ASMR. Perfection 👌

[@littlemichaeljr6518]

I know right, isn't he a handsome ASMRtist? And his voice is so great. He'd be perfect for the ASMR version of Tony Stark

[@Hedgehogofthesea]

Fantastic commentary as always aside- This is a top tier sleepy time asmr video and put me right to sleep (had to come back for a daytime listen and then it had me in stitches). Your whisper here is particularly 10/10 and the switching between mics was lovely. Well done!!

[@rocknrollroses]

can I, a low-value woman (?), watch this video?? someone please give me guidance edit: just read the description--I understand this is not my place 😔

[@ihavenoname6119]

Reach mid value and maybe they'll reconsider 🤧 i was also now allowed here

[@PhoenicianSailor]

All are welcome! Some are just more welcome than others. But all equally welcome. But not everyone. But welcome!

[@ArianaGramsci]

I love the fine irony you bring when you comment on these topics. They always end up being my favorites because of that

[@thijsjong]

High Value men. 6 figures 6 feet uh 6 uh something something I forgot? Can I watch anyway?

[@PhoenicianSailor]

I have submitted a request to @youtube to allow video creators to only show videos to people by identified gender, sub-category of value, but they have not yet come through for me. Until then I guess you can do whatever you want. What have we come to?

[@AhNoWiC]

I know this is obvious satire but by the gods, this man could sell me snake oil calling it panacea and I'd almost believe it. Thank the gods you're not a grifter lol.

[@tomcruise8578]

At the risk of accidentally identifying you a high value male, I enjoyed the wit and wisdom in this one, can always use a good reminder to keep ego in check.

[@forkme3165]

I've never felt so simultaneously insulted and relaxed 😂😂😂

[@alohomoratarot]

I almost hollered when you started detailing me laying in bed, and then I completely evaporated when you purred. Absolutely brilliant.

[@thefoolsjournal]

You, sir, are an entire delight.

[@catharinaeisenhuber267]

was that a quote from Cider Hosue rules in the beginning? it is the most peculiar translation in german. something like: gods creation and devils addition. What am i even doing here? i could talk my way out and say i dont understand a word what is going on, so i cant be prosecuted for watching something that wasnt meant for me. well.. lets just say I relay on your graciousness of letting me watch this aswell.

[@katl3589]

Those snorts, er, purrs made me laugh out loud just about every time. 😭 Not to mention the impeccable audio and video quality, as always~

[@alessia9328]

i'm officially obsessed with u This is sooo good, also there are small moments when you start a sentence and then it almost seems like you yourself don't know where you are going that reminds me sooo much of Micheal Scott like for example at 7:06 and this video just makes me laugh wholeheartedly

[@alessia9328]

"Perhaps you are having difficulties imagining it... because... I don't see how it could be possible, frankly" even the facial expressions and mannerisms, if you ever wanted to do a Micheal Scott ASMR you totally could.

[@steveerickson411]

Good Jordan Peterson roleplay, but you look far too healthy to be fully convincing.

[@limitisillusion7]

I saved the world Sailor! I couldn't have done it without you. Love forever.

[@lakeireland]

Those kitten purrs *fans self* Be still my low-valued man loving heart.😂

[@GracesGrove]

This came up in my recommended and I’m dying 😆🤣🤣🤣. Well done 👏

[@michaellong7229]

You do have a good purr / growl - time for a werewolf asmr?

[@DeathnoteBB]

I saw this in my subscriptions and snorted 😂

[@Elykmai]

Great way to spend my birthday. Thanks for the upload!

[@lakeireland]

Happy Cake & Fire Hazard Day!

[@emreads]

@@lakeireland LMAO I love that. I'm stealing this

[@ghostspooky4974]

Does a jockstrap count as magic underwear? Really wanna get into Heaven but worried I’m a sub-8 male deep down and was rightfully afflicted with both chronic epididymitis and an inability to distinguish what I should and shouldn’t share publically as punishment for not being a proper chad. I really hope I don’t wind up in Hell for the wrong undies, it’s like going to jail for jaywalking or parking tickets…

[@littlemichaeljr6518]

i love this, I feel like we're getting closer and closer to a Tony Stark ASMR video. first we got an Elon Musk ASMR video and we all know Elon Musk is the real life Tony Stark now we got an ASMR for high value men and we all know Tony Stark is a high value man. The days of getting a Tony Stark ASMR video are upon us and it's only fitting that it's done by Sailor the bestfriend of Ephemeral Rift the Doctor Strange of the ASMR community. One day we will get a Tony Stark ASMR video and hopefully even a Tony Stark and Doctor Strange ASMR collab video with Sailor and Ephemeral Rift, respectively.

[@EclecticallyEccentric]

It's always a bit sad and ridiculous when Musk fanboys call him a real life Tony Stark like that's a good thing. I wonder how many of them are aware of just how terrible comic book Tony is, compared to the watered-down version in the MCU.

[@littlemichaeljr6518]

@@EclecticallyEccentric who's a "fanboy"? 😂 being the real life Tomy Stark is a GREAT thing and I'm well aware of the comics I wasn't referring to any of the comics version lol why you gotta assume before thinking? I was referencing the MCU version of Tony Stark clearly as I even said Ephemeral rift is doctor strange and if you watched his asmr video you know that he's also obviously referring to doctor strange in the MCU. His video literally says "the day before the infinity war" when the video starts. It's people like you who always want to jump to irrational conclusions without knowing the full thing or details

[@eddieray]

13:06 my favorite sound 😂😌

[@BradsPitts.]

Cat role play dropping when? 😂

[@kronicneurotic]

You gotta put on a bald cap for an Andrew Tate video

[@itsbilis]

…and on the month men are shunned the most. Practically forgot of /j New to the channel, was a great watch :)

[@devenjudd6411]

Background set design is very cool ! Awesome content.

[@RisottoNero-z1w]

You truly are a gem

[@CharlieTheSupersaurus]

Is this a safe space for non avian dinosaurs or are we too irrelevant and outdated to chad it up to view this video without feeling like we're misappropriating high value men culture?

[@Gal_lahad]

Не могу не сказать, что вы очень красивый 🤭 И классная маска из Чёрного телефона на заднем фоне 🖤

[@michaelfaraday3917]

I know most of this was haha funny, but I felt pretty seen and known when you called me out for being in my boxers lol

[@QuantumWalnut]

Haven't lose your touch one bit. *thumbs up*

[@derp195]

I know this is a joke but I just can't 😂

[@stacy9538]

Sailor ..maybe my comment will be disregarded because I am not a man lol but ...any chance you could make a similar one of these for those of us who are women and who identify as women please ? 😆😆😆 ..still relaxing to listen to ..even if it doesn't apply to me 😊🎉 Edit: I know this is satire lol 😂 I was briefly fooled ..I must hang my head in the ultimate shame 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@Coridimus]

I'm certain this is satire of Jordan Petersen. So, why would you want this but orientated towards women? Aside from the obvious absurdist comedy of "Petersen cares about women."

[@stacy9538]

@@Coridimus hehe yeah I realised that 😆

[@loui4898]

Cider house rules man!

[@JonathanThorsonASMR]

This is Gold🥇

[@the_happykodiak2421]

High Value ASMR

[@sleepycatcafe]

Hi sweetheart :3

[@Cae_lan]

Im actually just better than everyone tho (my physiatrist thinks im delusional)

[@Pieza_De_Queso]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@jerrijobarkerlove3613]

😂❤

[@polydipsiac]

Daddy called me sweetheart ❤

[@limitisillusion7]

I noticed you liked my comment Sailor, so I know you read these, so please hear me out. Did you ever wonder why the number 7 shows up everywhere in religions and nature, music, rainbows etc? I have found the answer to that question, the REAL answer. If you are curious, please respond.

[@collidinguniverses]

И ты ещё чего-то хочешь? Это после всего, да?

[@NiueanCA]

im high value cuz i listen to andrew tate

[@Uploaded1995]

See we say this kinda thing as a joke, but the fact that there's actual guys out there who think that unironically is pretty sad and disturbing.

[@NiueanCA]

@@Uploaded1995 ...joke?

[@emreads]

@@NiueanCA This entire video is satire. I guess we found the one that didn't actually watch the video, look at the channel, or read the description 👌

[@PhoenicianSailor]

Listening is not enough. You must emulate and become. You must transcend and transfigure. Most of all, you must never make sense. Best of luck on your journey, may the Top G smile upon you. From prison, I suppose.

[@NiueanCA]

​@@PhoenicianSailor thats what im doing with this video im watching it on mute emulating you telling me how much of a sigma male I am and also asking how my relationship with claude the zombie is going(we're engaged). I wouldnt expect the others to understand they are not alpha enough

[@No1TypeC]

Always loved your JP-esque satire, and the rest of your satire in general. Snarky and brilliant also Trans Rights 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️