Barry Fuller Won’t Sign a Contract: John Green Solves Your Problems #39

Today's problem: contracts. The Wimbly Womblys play Jagiellonia.
Give us problems in the comments!
And consider following us on Twitter: @AFCWimblyWombly

[@KevinLohmann]

John acting like none of us have ever heard any amount of AFC Wimbledon's incredible history is my favorite joke and never gets old.

[@someguy7567]

Kevin Lohmann I always pretend to be surprised. Like I have never heard it before.

[@elinobenjamin_val]

Welcome to John Green Solves Your Problems, without Your Problems

[@thehinduskakid]

is this john green solves your problems or john green solves john green's problems

[@evanadcock387]

Imagine if some other semi-pro Fifa players (John skill level) became the official Fifa player for other League 1/League 2 teams and then there was a 3rd tier league version of the e-sport and John could then be the arch-enemy of the Fifa player for the franchise currently plying its trade it Milton Keynes, or have a friendly match against the official Fifa player for Swindon Town.

[@rwhe423723]

The roller coaster of emotion for the Kaja goal to the realization of the soul patch was wonderful and I sincerely thank you for bringing me along with you on that journey.

[@AnimalArmyStudio]

Marc Bola (LB, former Arsenal player, 19yo) is a solid pickup on the cheap and for years to come. He would make an excellent addition to the Wembley Womblies!

[@jennyrice184]

So excited to see this today! In the mean time I may have spent my time watching literally hundreds of Swoodlipooper videos and earlier iterations of AFC Wimbledon...

[@mellow-mike]

Here are my transfer suggestions in some of the positions you look underdeveloped in. They are around the rating of your team but will grow to be much better and are relatively affordable. Obviously everything apart from the names change once you get further into the manager mode so these attributes are subject to change. GK: Mile Svilar - 17 y/o, plays for SL Benfica, 65 rating, valued around £750k with a wage of around £1k [Really just a basic, decent all around goalkeeper] LB: Gastón Togni - 19 y/o, plays for Independiente, 65 rating, valued around £1M with a wage of around £3k, also plays LM and LW [Quite fast with good dribbling (although not the greatest defensive stats)] CB: Lutsharel Geertruida - 16 y/o, plays for Feyenoord , 63 rating, valued around £600k with a wage of around £1k, also plays RB [Strong, fast, good heading, young defender] Ryan Nyambe - 19 y/o, plays for Blackburn Rovers, 65 rated, valued around £900k with a wage of around £2k, also plays RB and RWB [Similar to Geertruida but a little worse despite rating] Jérôme Junior Onguéné - 19 y/o, plays for FC Red Bull Salzberg, 65 rated, valued around £950k with a wage of around £3k [Medium pace but very strong and can jump high] CM: Zaydou Youssouf - 17 y/o, plays for Girondins de Bordeaux, 65 rated, valued around £950k with a wage of around £5k [Decently pacey with good stamina, balance and shot power (although not very accurate)] Sandro Tonali - 17 y/o, plays for Brescia, 65 rated, valued around £950k with a wage of around £1k, also plays CDM [Decent all-arounder but with a great potential to grow stats (that aren't physical stats)]

[@mcol3]

Did you hear that Seb Brown saved two penalties against Luton Town?

[@Sam-yw6sg]

Here are some suggestions: - Plizzari (GK with potential of 82) - Schrek (CAM with potential of 78) - Arzani (RM with 82 potential) - Liam Rose (CM with 76 potential) - Alex Gersbach (LB with 80+ potential) - Doucoure (CB with 82 potential) I’m sure otherwise will suggest heaps so I’ll leave it at that

[@aaditbhatia6551]

Sam Silcock Schreck has great potential.

[@henrykates1907]

Aadit Bhatia exactly, I’d say the potential for at least 4 moderately successful animated films

[@aaditbhatia6551]

Henry Kates Maybe even 5 or 6.

[@dynasticcarrot]

Hey John, great video. I think making the facecam bigger would really send it over the top.

[@qdHazen]

Not really surprised to see you struggle against them, Manager John Green. Jagiellonia finished 2017-18 2nd in the Ekstraklasa (Poland's top tier league).

[@Kron0]

John, as much as I adore your face, please do not feel too worried about whether it's there or not, or in focus. It's a lovely bonus when avalible, but we are all here for that HIGH CLASS SECOND TIER ENGLISH FOOTBALL.

[@n.d.1315]

is Meridith a real person?

[@erin-xn4zu]

N. D. Yes, she writes for mental floss

[@n.d.1315]

+erin So she is a friend of John Green?

[@rayhs1984]

As real as anyone is ... Seriously though she works for Crash Course.

[@czdaniel1]

"M' = Yeti 2.0"

[@ThisIsReMarkable]

Yes she is real and she is a very nice person. Source- AFC Wimbly Wombly meetup at NerdCon

[@ryanhines8080]

My favorite KZbin series is finally back!

[@secretaltruism4174]

John, I wish to support AFC Wimbledon, but I'd prefer for someone in the UK to be the holder of the membership, and I feel that maybe there are others like me. Could Nerdfighteria do an Indiegogo or some other fundraiser where people can sponsor a Dons Trust membership and a single home match ticket/season ticket for those in the UK that would use it? I really want AFC Wimbledon to do well, and I think this could be a fun idea. But it would also take organising so I understand why people may not want to. P.S. I know I can join the Dons Trust from overseas, but it seems nicer to gift it to someone in the UK who wouldn't/couldn't otherwise get it.

[@julienbelair6524]

if we did a fund like that the team could raffle the nerdfighter donated tickets off for a fundraiser or give them to local kids. wouldnt that be rad.

[@secretaltruism4174]

Jules Ortega I would love that.

[@gfloyd2002]

I think it would be more fun if you signed the same players as real Wimbledon. Imagine the possibilities of pulling off a Tom King save in FIFA or fiddling with new formations to take advantage of Mitch Pinnock on the left. Keep with Womblys close to the Dons!

[@brendanobrien8198]

Literally just finished the first season last night perfect timing

[@josephcraven6362]

Finally I've been waiting for this video as long as I've been waiting for the real Premier League to start

[@jhawk889]

I don't know if you've heard of this player, I think he's kinda good? His name is Lionel Messi. He plays for FC Barcelona so I think he's good. You should try and sign him

[@connierobinson1090]

John, your success is valid

[@sweetpepino1907]

I've played a lot of career mode, and the biggest thing for a low tier team is youth development in my opinion. You can just get one or two youth scouts with five star rated judgment (They're expensive though, can run you between $2mil-$3.5mil), but they pay dividends. This game tends to throw future world class talent at you all the time, and through the player training menu you can train 2 players so that they gain between 8-12 points in overall rating a season, or if you like you can get one guy up about 15 points. Goalkeepers especially grow fast and future De Gea's are a dime a dozen. Another thing you can do is check free agents under the transfer menu by checking transfer status, and scouting any players whose stats seem promising. They typically range between 50-68 overall, and at the higher end of that they'll likely ask for about $10k a week with $200k-300k in signing bonuses. A bit expensive but being able to skip club negotiations makes them worth it. Sometimes you might even find a diamond in the rough there, like in my Wimbledon career I found a young Swedish striker named Gustav Jarl who basically took the team on his back all the way to the Champions League. Also I can't really help you with transfer suggestions, but other people in the comments have you covered there. But, if you still have Anthony Hartigan, he has potential to become a 75 overall, and Oshilaja turns out to be about a 73, but in my experience he can still surprisingly hold his own even in the Premier League on legendary difficulty at that overall because of his strength, pace, and jumping. Better suited at RB against better opposition though.

[@defcon12]

Good morning hank or john or whoever actually posts this. Have a good day!

[@Isa.isa.isa.]

Yay John Green Solves Your Problems Is BACK!

[@julienbelair6524]

John, I have a problem with the fact that I feel like I'm losing a friend. She was the first person I met when I moved out of my parents house and we clicked right away and became really good friends for a couple of years now. She came to my high school graduation and helped me to cope with being kicked out at 18 especially during that difficult first year. Lately however she just seems very out of touch with the reality of my life and I dont enjoy her company very much any more. Its just as if we have nothing in common. We come from very different backgrounds and when I try to share whats going on in my life she often seems to not understand. Shes from a very wealthy family and often when I try talk about issues im having with school or employment she gives me these extremely out of touch answers. Sometimes shell just quickly change the subject to something innocuous like boys she dated years ago. We used to talk about things so real substance but things are just so much more pressing for me now and she just feels so distant. I do value her as a person, i just dont value the time we spend together anymore, i dread her asking to hang out because i just feel so alienated by her. im starting to wonder if our worlds are just too different for us to be friends. thanks john, jules

[@erin-xn4zu]

Remembering the DH&J episode where they told someone to make up problems they knew how to solve for their advice column

[@Threeezzz]

Has anyone told John about scouting/youth academy/that financial take-over thing?

[@mustardsfire22]

Maybe try signing Joe Pigott? He seems to be working well for IRL Wimbledon.

[@Spiros219]

Not that John Fortnite pacifist

[@connierobinson1090]

Wait so...Barry Fuller did sign a contract

[@tchapman0830]

A Problem: For a long time, I've struggled with test anxiety. Due to this, I often freeze up, blank out, or have a full on panic attack when I am faced with a test in school. The thing is -- people don't believe me, including my teachers many times, because it does not affect my grades. The same is true with other forms of anxiety and mental illness in general, I've noticed: unless there is a visible sign of it, people don't believe it's real. A long time ago, there was a Swindon Town Swoodily Poopers video on anxiety, but can you help solve this related problem? How do I get people to take me seriously? How am I ever supposed to get help if no one believes that I have a problem to begin with? Thank you!

[@lucasgibbons3917]

Situation: I am doing an activity that I used to have a lot of fun with and really enjoyed, but recently I have just started to hate it. I want to quit, but I have friends that I can only see during the activity. I feel like I will let people down if I quit. What am I to do?

[@alainart]

ComicsFromanOddKid Is it going to end any time in the near future? Why do you hate it now? (I had the same problem, with high school marching band, so I just finished the year and didn't come back the next)

[@maxhines4705]

This seems like a Dear Hank and John question. (Be prepares for some dubious advice!) But in reality, I’m not sure...

[@lucasgibbons3917]

I have another 6 months of it to do. I hate it mostly because it dominates my life. I can't enjoy other things because I only seem to be doing the activity.

[@alainart]

ComicsFromanOddKid I say quit, if you aren't enjoying anything anymore. As long as quitting doesn't have big repercussions, that is. If seeing your friends isn't enough, just quit. (Also, are you can Odd1sOut fan? I ask because of you name lol)

[@Asasnol21]

ComicsFromanOddKid Uhh, what's the activity if you dont mind sharing? I guess if you re good friends with these people you can surely meet up someplace else.

[@IsaacComelli]

At 2:07, was I the only one who thought John was talking about Jagie⚡⚡o? Who else remembers good ol double lightning strike?

[@BanthaTube]

It says on the bottom left of the screen how to skip the dialogue while negotiating player contracts.

[@heikothedwarf]

John-Joe O’Toole! He’s only a 64, but he has a beautiful manbun

[@vikki4367]

I haven't got any suggestions as I have no idea about FIFA or football really but I do have a problem. I can't stop manifesting other people's dreams for the future as my own

[@christianridings1870]

John, I have a problem. I am more or less addicted to whistling (please just accept this without question) and I am soon shipping off to college where whistling several hours per day is not as socially accepted as it has been for the last few years of my life in my private home. An easy solution would seem to be “stop whistling so much” but I would like to think that it’s not so simple. Plz help

[@radagastwiz]

Jagiellonia is, obviously, where Jagiełło came from...

[@rayhs1984]

According to Wiki : Jagiellonia finished 2nd in the top teir of Polish football last season.

[@DrGbr23]

Search for the goalkeeper Esteban Alvarado!

[@ryanrestau4473]

You should sign Adebayo Akinfenwa and Nouha Dicko

[@guaflar]

Is he training his players? Even just simulating the sessions would make Roffo a beast in no time

[@szeth14]

Meadesey Don't GOOOOoooooo

[@GatlinGang]

Welcome back!!

[@penguin1952]

Sign Anthony Mandrea, Ian Harkes, and Pelle Clement, or Nicolas Guerra

[@TheLenmae]

What's that weird noise around 9:06 ?

[@martingravely2534]

Put your transfer money into top scouts and then sign a bunch of young players. Use them and improve them and they can grow with the club as they rise the leagues. You’ll be able to get youth players around the same level as league 2 players

[@ScottKorin]

What's all that stuff on the pitch? Litter? Leaves?

[@defcon12]

You enjoy this too much John

[@Rayeriz]

My problem is that I'm afraid to ask for a raise after a few mistakes I've done but I still think I deserved it.

[@BanthaTube]

Press Y for Suggested Subs.

[@aashirneupane2688]

My name is John And I sign contracts

[@jamiehart2008]

I’d recommend signing Adam McDonnell, he’s a cheap central midfielder and can potentially become a 78 overall skill level

[@nj42396]

Jonathan Leko!

[@lavachebeadsman]

Bring back Dicko!

[@crawfordbrown75]

John, I say this every week but you've never seen my comment. *There's a button to skip contract negotiation scenes.* Ps play football manager

[@maxhines4705]

+

[@erin-xn4zu]

What’s John’s deal with gingers? I feel like I’m missing something.

[@julienbelair6524]

why do humans love diamonds? rarity, beauty, and value. just like gingers lol

[@JunSian1001]

Is it me or Bald John Green and Other John Green are not in the team?!!!

[@JunSian1001]

Nevermind, they are away for the World Cup...

[@n.d.1315]

I would help, but I never played ea sports.

[@mattpatrickmusic]

Alphonso Davies is probably the best player you could possibly sign

[@alfie6098]

JOHN SIGN TAKEFUSA KUBO. He's ridiculously cheap and grows to be very good!

[@Jesse_Carl]

Who the blast is Meredith

[@ultimateo621]

You should stream Fortnite so we can give you tips when you don’t have child labor.

[@alainart]

Yay! More Fortnite! (Aw, I'm 15, I wish I could be your child labor, but I'm not that great at video games)

[@jamesfrazier4005]

If your funds are high.. why dont you try and go for players in the 70's range. Perhaps a good goalie and some faster midfielders too. The less than great back can be forgiven with a good goalie.

[@brendanobrien8198]

Get tim weah

[@n.d.1315]

hi

[@defcon12]

Don't forget to keep doing Fortnite pacifist John or else we'll start rioting

[@daltongrowley5280]

I find your discrimination against abnormal facial hair offensive, but maybe valid? people can hav ewhatewver facial hair they want.

[@Javjean]

1 dislike, nice

[@cameronmoorhead7974]

get tim weah hes an american teenager he plays for psg and is super cheap

[@TheGrumbleduke]

When you talk about gingers like that, maybe consider how it would sound if you replaced a minority hair colour with a minority skin colour, and whether that would still be as funny. Gingers are real, complex people, not just a hair colour.

[@shannonfallon668]

Agreed! Thank you for pointing this out!

[@niallplunkett6056]

Yeah whatever you ginger

[@הדרהלוי-ב1ה]

TheGrumbleduke Can't tell if you're joking.

[@julienbelair6524]

Poe's Law

[@Asasnol21]

100% poe's law If you re serious, it's just a running gag dude. If you re not serious, medium taste of humour