Kids Write Jokes Quiz | Barshens

[@seanfitz1234]

I think my favourite part of any barshens episode is the slow decay of structure as the episode goes on.

[@swanningabout]

Pissflaps

[@aborted4196]

Ruff ruff

[@chupathingy6626]

That's my favorite part of EVERY Barshens episode! 😆

[@antster1983]

@@aborted4196 Who let Richard Brandoff into the Barshens comments?

[@SmD-ff5xd]

:) 7:41

[@august3833]

I babysit this kid, when he was 3 or so, he discovered jokes. He once came up to me and said, "I have a joke for you.... I eat strawberries with my cereal!" He then began to laugh uncontrollably, which made me laugh. Because I was laughing at the bizarre statement he had just made, that led him to believe that it was a very funny joke. He told it to absolutely everyone.

[@samholdsworth420]

LMAO

[@gjfjfgjdhjd1303]

Same thing happened to me once, except I was the kid who just discovered jokes. And also no one was laughing along with me.

[@oz_jones]

Oh, bless him!

[@CptFantabulous]

"I'm locking in a kid" that will be a GIF soon.

[@traeyboy529]

That bit is just mentally funny.

[@samholdsworth420]

Where is the gif?

[@YsCelia]

I'm french, here's the translation of what they say at 0:35. Eli: I love France. Write the "haha". Cousin Dan: Good, good. Always. Ashens: Yes, I like the... huh... kids write jokes. Cousin Dan: Barry, what is your name? Barry: There's a cow in my trousers. At the pool. There. Now you know.

[@MathewHaswell]

I'm surprised they didn't say "My Hovercraft is Full of Eels".

[@drmegaman]

Thanks, I couldn't catch any of what Barry was saying.

[@drragonwolf]

and the beginning?

[@YsCelia]

From 0:00 to 0:20; Cousin Dan: Hi my friends. Good morning. Welcome to Barshens. I am Cousin Dan. I am present with Barry, Stuart and Eli. My friends, I have a Quizz. You are going a Quizz. The kids write jokes. The twitter. Eleven questions. And you have to guess... Overall pretty impressive!

[@dominopicamation5836]

Oh Barry.

[@alexeverett308]

"Knock knock, chicken, doctor doctor. That's my theory." - Barry Lewis, PHD

[@samholdsworth420]

Stuart has the PhD not barry 🫐

[@petrichor2889]

1:43 Interesting sidenote: if adults use 'hypnotic regression' during therapy to try and revert to their childhood selves and uncover a forgotten childhood trauma that is supposedly the root of their adulthood problems, then they actually do exactly what Eli is saying. They don't revert to behaving like a child, rather they revert to behaving how an adult _thinks_ that a child behaves. His answer might have been wrong, but his logic wasn't and I think that is an important lesson about the universe.

[@OliviaWonka]

I want a condiment special. I think it's needed. All of us deserve a 15-minute episode of Eli describing different types of condiments and his midnight feasts

[@branflake0]

Eli and Paul compare a whole load of mayonnaises in a recent The Cheap Show podcast. www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ep-68-league-of-snacks

[@OliviaWonka]

Spicemaster oh I know, but I need more. The world needs more of Eli

[@AsymptoteInverse]

I'd be happy to have a 15-segment of Eli describing pretty much anything.

[@Dombalurina]

Ryan is such a good presenter, he's got that deadpan delivery down to a tee.

[@Mischief_Manager93]

Well, he is Stuart's nephew so he probably got it from him.

[@swanningabout]

@@Mischief_Manager93 That's not how genetics work

[@Mischief_Manager93]

@@swanningabout well of course, but the two spent quite a bit of time together so Ryan likely picked up a few of Stewart's mannerisms. Plus snarky deadpan just seems to be a thing that British people in general seem to pick up.

[@polishenglish8356]

I loved the moment when Cousin Dan just lost it :D A perfect episode as always :D

[@ahandsomefridge]

You don't get to see that a lot on camera. Good one!

[@aborted4196]

Because he's a sociopath

[@marlastrongbow]

Barry mate, do transparent mayonnaise glasses on MVK

[@Novel_Poe]

Mvc

[@grimTales1]

I thought the punchline for "What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes" would be "Doyouthinkhesaurus" or something.

[@BricksAndButter]

waiting for Barshens Out of Context to gif Eli screaming MAYONNAISE and pointing

[@alexeverett308]

And "I'm locking in a kid"

[@HeroG9000]

I mean in context it don’t make sense

[@GmodPlusWoW]

7:42 at 0.5x for delayed *M A Y O N N A I S E*

[@spencerparsch7685]

My little cousin thinks a joke is when you run up and yell JOKE! I laugh every time which probably isn’t helping.

[@curlybob17]

5 years later and I finally think of the better title for this show. "kid or fib"

[@vulpesinculta3238]

Eli is all of us. I could really see myself in his anecdote about leaving a plate of mayonnaise in his bedroom for days.

[@russianspy5307]

We've all been there at some point

[@HattmannenNilsson]

In the bedroom, though? :-/ In my younger days I quite frequently left plates out for days on end with an assortment of different foodstuffs debris, but I did at least stack it in the kitchen alcove. Why would you leave it in your sleeping area for several days? If nothing else, I'd think you'd transfer the plate to the designated mould incubation area (kitchen worktop) when you go to get something new from the kitchen, just to have a spot to put the new plate. Wouldn't you?

[@vulpesinculta3238]

Guess you're not a fan of teenaged 4 am television show binges with chips and soda, then.

[@ahandsomefridge]

It's perfectly fine to leave some bedroom in your leftover food chamber

[@HattmannenNilsson]

+Vulpes Inculta No, not really. Though I'm all for binge watching a show and working on my physical shape (i.e. trying to approximate a sphere in one day by stuffing myself on snacks). :-) Teenaged, though - nope! I'm pretty sure I'm against it. We'd all probably be better off if we just abolished the teen years altogether. One day you're a happy 12 year old child, the next morning you wake up as a well adjusted, young adult 20-something. ^_^

[@MrIcecolddd]

Oh god I can just imagine Eli’s house of pickles now, an eclectic mix of small pieces of tat and multiple jars of expired condiments.

[@faenethlorhalien]

Fun fact both Lyons in France and León in Spain (Barry made the joke about that French city, but "lions" in French would be "lions", just pronounced like you're eating a frog) owe their name to the Latin word "Legio", meaning "legion", as they were places where significant legions would be stationed. Similar to all the Castro something towns in Northern and Northwestern Spain and all the placenames that have "chester", "cester" and "caster" in English, as they derive from the Latin "Castrum", meaning "military encampment".

[@somewhatmesmerized]

This was glorious, Ryan's kid joke delivery is the best and I want more. Preferably a 3D special enhanced by mayonnaise glasses

[@Battledongus]

"I'm locking in a kid" "next time on Barshens" LOL

[@FerHivore]

Barry not _quite_ grasping the antihumor will never cease to amuse me.

[@samholdsworth420]

He's thicccccc

[@samholdsworth420]

Shut up sam

[@TediI47]

"Are you serious? You can make glasses out of mayonaise?" Barry never disappoints, you just know that was legit. I guess it's a mystery of the universe why Barry doesn't understand kid jokes yet mentally is one himself.

[@HermitMongoose]

#BarryWasTeapot

[@MathewHaswell]

At least he wasn't robbed.

[@archgirl]

Can’t believe they had a Doyouthinkhe-saurus joke without the punchline. Wonderful.

[@DarthJedi2005remixes]

There is a bum at the door.

[@comradeurod9805]

DarthJedi2005remixes tell him we dont have anything for him

[@jacquelineharkiss1018]

Ryan is just like...so adorable. Especially when he got excited after they all believed his window joke, and when he was cracking up at Eli

[@HeyItsAJOmega]

I love how in every great Barshens video, you can pinpoint the exact moment the episode comes completely off the rails. For example, in this one it's 10:20 - 'I'm locking in a kid'

[@mozza1203]

"Put yer mayonnaise glasses on and get in yer hole!" - Eli Silverman, 2018.

[@iamdb1990]

"surprising how many people read this" in the Patreon credits lol

[@swanningabout]

iamdb1990 well done

[@iamdb1990]

thanks? lol

[@0LoneTech]

So are "illegal immigrant", "hey, I'm a" and "leftie".

[@vissenekku]

Yep ^^ Noticed that too. Thus proving it's point.

[@jekanyika]

I'm wearing a pair of mayonnaise glasses right now.

[@seth1130]

Ryan's laugh is my favorite

[@crackedemerald4930]

"well well well! Guess who's here! *Says a man inside some evil laboratory on a rotating chait looking away from you*" "You are never going to eradicate redheds doctor Evil McEvilton! Your plan is going to fail!" "You only forgot one thing mister bond... *Turns to you dramatically* There's a bum at the door *Lightning strikes and he starts laughing maniacally*"

[@Florafly]

Slightly in love with Ryan.

[@georgethakur]

I was actually looking for a comment like this. He is not a bad-looking guy.

[@jordanbaker2015]

God I miss old school barshens

[@iamdb1990]

I liked the part when Barry was a teapot

[@GmodPlusWoW]

#BarryWasTeapot

[@CheeseLord]

Brb making Ryan's laugh my ringtone

[@ChristianSpliess]

We need a book with Cousin Dans jokes.

[@jopomeister]

This has some of the best soundbytes yet. Wonderful

[@Pyrozoid]

that 4 is soo small ... oh god it's killing me I cant stop laughing

[@adammullarkey4996]

You know, this was truly the most concise and sensible intro you guys have ever done. I wish you'd do this every time; it's a nice change to actually understand what's going on in the video.

[@dantefloressq]

I've never been so entertained by four guys talking about condiments.

[@linktheordonianhero9098]

I'd watch a Barshens episode of them just chatting and talking about stuff. This one was fantastic

[@pongldr]

they have a podcast on soundcloud if you've not listened to it.

[@linktheordonianhero9098]

You are a good person

[@oneofmanyjames-es1643]

The fundraising goal has been reached, BRING ON THE NEW BARSHENS

[@adrienfourniercom]

pas mal le français au début. Bravo cousin Dan

[@happyotter9]

- Eli is such a short person. - Yeah, lets put him on the lowest chair to make it even more noticeable!

[@Nytephyre]

“PUT YOUR MAYONNAISE GLASSES ON AND GET BACK IN THE HOLE”! I laughed so hard at this I ended up with a charley horse in my neck. Painful but worth it.

[@SebWad]

I've come back to this video after six years with captions on. "Bienvenue abortion, just because and downs, as we present avec Belly, Stuart, He Lies" is a hell of an opener.

[@leonstrongbow2410]

I'm really digging eli's maternity dress. arf!

[@edabbott8130]

"is mayonnaise a *GLASSES* "

[@lm_dccxl4078]

I luv the place and size of the number 4 on Eli 12:33

[@And_Sun_Yk]

The camaraderie is sooo good. I missed it for the last 5 years lol

[@SmD-ff5xd]

:) 7:41 is my answer to your question.

[@n.s.mcmahon6180]

This has got to be one of the best episodes so far.

[@KAgius96]

I live for the quote at the end

[@MassiveTestes]

The very best thing about these kid's jokes is Eli's laugh when he hears them

[@micajoeh0]

0:50: Barry, what are you named? Barry: there is a cow, in my pants, at the pool.

[@richardcastro-parker3704]

Classic :-) I have watched this about 5 times.

[@BritishAdam]

The subtitles for this video when Cousin Dan was speaking french are amazing.

[@gungaloscrungalo8925]

Yes! Been waiting for more kids jokes since that last don't laugh challenge, they're absolute gold!

[@amaruqlonewolf3350]

That intro reminded me of Eustace kicking the TV in one of the Courage episodes and yelling "TALK NORMAL"

[@brianartillery]

Barry: (Translated) "There's a cow, in trousers, in my sink." Lovely.

[@pamwilkinson4302]

Thanks for making me laugh! Please make mayo glasses!

[@Fonsutox]

"Bienvenue abortion",nice one Cousin Dan

[@UnrelatedArchives]

Barshens is a most beloved abortion.

[@mysteryqwopster]

Mayonnaise glasses is definitely a future segment

[@polk-e-dot8177]

i like that he just gave up at the end "and you have to guess." cousin dan was the only person who's accent i could actually understand.

[@AndyLundell]

I think it's very cruel of Barshens to keep calling Cousin Dan "Ryan" just because he isn't a natural-born Dan. That's discrimination! Let him be the best Dan he can be!

[@aoifebakunin1966]

Eli's chair and the camera angle from Ryan's side makes him look like a hobbit

[@Spanners_]

Now the question remains, where are they locking in the kids?

[@cosmicjenny4508]

+Happyspanners4 In the mayonnaise glasses repair hole.

[@TheSmart-CasualGamer]

Paul's Containment Unit.

[@SierraEire]

I don't speak Welsh.

[@greenbeanington6095]

It's Gailic ya' doof.

[@cat21860]

Mayonnaise Glasses is my new band name.

[@travosk8668]

These are just so fun to watch!

[@KlyeKlyeKlye]

Kids and Barshens, this can't end well!

[@Stonerman023]

Is this the first episode where Bono was in charge of carpets, and not carpets impersonating Bono?

[@AlbertEisbaer]

What a glorious episode!

[@JonponMusic]

Aw the thumbnail, RIP Barry Chuckle

[@Novel_Poe]

#tosoon

[@swanningabout]

@@Novel_Poe too*

[@amandatorian9173]

"I'm gonna say that one's true 'cause I don't get the ones that are true." Oh, Barry. Never change.

[@briangriffin9842]

3k kids didn’t put on their mayonnaise glasses

[@drragonwolf]

amazing episode A+ editing as expected

[@theonlyenicfanever5346]

Heck yeah, a new barshens

[@meug5288]

TheOnlyEnicFanEver hmm

[@Bobba_raekus]

Stuart Ashen, or as they call him in France: "L'homme de Canapé"

[@charlottestevens9352]

What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? do you think he saurus-rex. That's the version I heard

[@ophigreen2096]

Heard the same, minus rex.

[@thebigwest1794]

That’s from Jurassic park.

[@no_genius]

The Big West no it’s a one eyed dinosaur. That’s the joke.

[@DylRicho]

I can't believe this was a year ago already.

[@milksheihk]

The dinosaur with no eyes is a Doyouthinkisaurus, I actually remember that from when I was a young kid in the mid 80s

[@RS250Squid]

Loved watching Ryan totally lose it. He's usually so composed :D.

[@jc441-i3q]

Omelette du fromage!

[@RS250Squid]

Omeletttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeee du fromaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage!!!! *bows*

[@TheSmart-CasualGamer]

Dos huevos por favor.

[@sirkowski]

Someone needs to explain to me every single one of these jokes.

[@laerin7931]

There's not much to explain. The joke in most of them is that they are horrible and unfunny, because kids wrote them.

[@drmegaman]

They could be considered anti-humor, in that the joke is in your confusion. As if you told a weird joke to someone and BAMBOOZLED!!!! them by giving them an unexpected answer. Then you get to laugh at their bewilderment.

[@technohellscape]

This French dub has terrible lip syncing.

[@richardcastro-parker3704]

Barry: "ACTUAL GLASSES OUT OF MAYONNAISE?"

[@Tgbec]

Barry’s next clear recipes are sorted now

[@1000ouija]

God I love this channel!

[@SeraphimKnight]

Somehow I'm more concerned about Barry wearing pants at the pool than him having a cow inside them at said pool.

[@Inglott]

What do you call a man in space, who can't breathe? An astronaut.

[@SuperFitzyBoi]

"It's hardened and gone see through" -Eli, 2018

[@slendercaterpie]

PUT YOUR MAYONNAISE GLASSES ON AND GET IN THE HOLE

[@KateRin-MotherDearest]

Eli is a national treasure.

[@landofgrundo]

I always love these

[@DeuteriumtheSentientMattress]

The way Stuart is holding his arm over the sofa makes him look like an amputee...

[@RoobehTunes]

Nothing, the window was closed!!! roflmao

[@edgeman83]

I see an idea for a new transparent food on MVK forming at 7:34.

[@robinburt5735]

One eyed dinosaur joke original punchline is "Dyathinkhesaurus"

[@theneroliveira]

The house of pickles and hardened, translucent mayonnaise! what a place!

[@peterballard6107]

Nice to see eli could not even be bothered to put on his barshens shirt

[@SamanthaPortUkulele]

Pretty sure it's not the first time.

[@TheSmart-CasualGamer]

He frequently doesn't. Hell, sometimes Barry doesn't wear one.