BERT HELLINGER - Missing mother - All is never enough - Part 2

Hellinger conference in London 2008.

[@iauk]

Healing is an authentic journey. I’m grateful to all effort let us witness this session with Bert Hellinger through free KZbin in my bedroom. His technique has enlightened many souls as a fact. He is not a showman. There is part 1 available. Nothing cruel here energy is everything and they are exchanging pure healing energy. We choose to witness or not …that’s it. We are a part of her journey at this moment as well. Watch your thoughts please!

[@AdailtonSalvatoreMeira]

You went to the point!!!

[@maktub08]

I think for someone who has deep resentment towards their mother, whether this resentment is unreasonable or not. Is important to explain the people that when they are talking about 'having a relationship with their mothers' that is meant to be a reconciliation with the past and their mother. Not not that you have to have a relationship with her. But, have your heart reconciled with whatever happened. Respect and accept your mother as she is with no criticisms, but the understanding that she gave the best she could with the best she had. And be at peace with her. One has to do a lot of work to achieve that and to continue life under a different light. I wondered what happened with that lady?

[@YFL.111]

Thank you this explanation is milion times better than the therapist in the video who comes across as cruel and horrible.

[@claudiaioana2214]

Therapist is not cruel at all. He simply put in words what poor lady feel inside. Believe my I am an abused child too. When you have a violent mother it feels like she is still hurding you.

[@leontienvandelft4925]

Are there any more parts of this session?

[@anastasiiakutafina6887]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/d4CvlmiEZ7R-arM

[@YFL.111]

This man may have knowledge about some things but he doesnt have empathy or compasion. Just by looking at his face I see he is cruel and emotionless. If he was a guru nowadays he would have people warning others about him. Influencers and stuff

[@1gaia]

He presents as very jaded and self-satisfied. His demeanour stinks of someone settled deeply into their ego rather than an expansive spiritual person who is still learning. There is no nuance here. Personally, I have a very expansive relationship with my mother, we have our problems, and she was very emotionally deregulated in my youth, but we have always tried to grow, and worked together to develop, but my relationship with my father has been almost non-existent due to early trauma he experienced (mixed with toxic male oppression in society) and dismissive and I struggle to develop relationships with romantic partners because I don't have an easy time relating to men. I think Bert felt he hit the jackpot with his theories and then wielded them quite recklessly (this poor woman is a prime example) as weapons to fend off criticism of himself. This was probably not a conscious decision on his part, but it makes his practices potentially dangerous for some, and there will always be people who blindly want to defer to a supposed guru, which further makes him an unquestionable figure of "authority". It's interesting how these "gurus" are often much more psychologically fascinating than their practices are effective.

[@YFL.111]

@@1gaia such a wise comment! Thanks a lot to explain it. What you mean with " psicologically fascinating"? You mean that they arent ok?

[@kvd54]

Compassion will make her weak and feeling hopeless. She needs the hard truth which will make her strong. I think he did a very good job and left her on the path to healing.

[@YFL.111]

@@kvd54 you think so? I dont know... I dont really see it. So you think he is super tough because it is an strategy to make people like... " comfront their deepest demons"? To me the way she looks at her and judges her is too much. You can say the truth without despising the pacient 😅 I have a very good relationship with my mother and I don't have a partner. Yet I have friend who doesn't even talk to their mothers and have amazing partners. He is right with his theories, it does makes sense and he made good discoveries. But his lack of felixibility is the flaw. Human beings cannot be an exact mathematics. The mistery of our minds and souls cannot be as simplified and rigidly judged. As a general rules Bert is right. But to go as far as to say that this woman doesn't talk to her mum because she is selfish or because she wants to be " comfortable" its a judgement which makes no sense, he doesn't even know if the mother terribly abused or rejected her, and he is making an assumption the mother is an angel and she is evil, without even properly looking or talking to her. As an intuitive person, I can see the woman from the video is not a bad daughter , but she was hugely rejected and criticized. There are moms who abuse their kids to the extreme. Should then those people who have been hugely abused by their moms, keep being abused all their life? Does that mean that hundred per cent of the times whem somebody doesnt get along with their mom they are unable to love? No. And I can give the example of my grandma she never got along with her mom and she was incredibly loving and it's been a true blessing for me to have her as a grandma. I feel you cannot just say something happens 100 per cent of the times with EVERYBODY when you are talking about therapies. To have 4 or 5 rules and apply it to people you don't even know like it's God's truth.. I don't see how is that wise specially if you are gonna humiliate that person in front of a crowd. Nowadyas I feel people have evolved his teachings. Its lile Freud. He was a very cold heartless man, but very inteligent. Nowadays psicologist dont do purely what Freud did, they have evolved it. We can be grateful to masters like Ben, without blindly following them like a guru. If we all put ours minds and talents together we can have better wisdom than following without even thinking or questioning for decades. I feel the pureness of his teachings can be kept while being evolved too. I went to family constellations and of course it was hard to see some things, but the therapist did not by any means treat me like that! I was being confronted to things but with sensitivity and explanation about why I had to accept or look at this or that. I know an older woman who actually had therapy with Bert personally in Argentina when he wasnt that famous. She told me it left her incredibly depressed and she wished she never went there, it did not help and just destroyed her even more after the death of her mom. So...sometimes being so tough to people just depresses them further. You cannot apply that method to everybody, its very dangerous, its needed to see who is in the position to deal with. Like... in one of Ben's books he tells a parents who's son committed suicide, that its their fault. If you are not careful with that, those parents may actually follow the son and kill themselves too. Also, in which planet compasion leaves you feeling hopeless? Compassion simply means the other person understand your point and your feelings, and can connect with you instead of just shouting some stuff to you because a book said so. Compassion is not pity.

[@feather243]

I think what he means is that Bert sees his patients as Bigger hierarchically than him, he says that many times. That you have to see the client as above you as a healer, not seeing yourself as superior and the client as a helpless victim. Like you say “poor woman”. She’s stuck in victim hurt child mode and it’s not helping her. Just because she’s opening up and being vulnerable with regards to her mother doesn’t mean she is a helpless victim, she’s actually very powerful and brave and completely connecting with Bert and you can tell its really transformative for her. He is not cruel, he sees the situation as acceptable and is teaching her to see it in the same way and make peace with it. To accept and consent to the way her mother is and what happened in the past.