Better Late Than Never: Our 7-Month-Old Baby Reveal!

[@LittleMel82]

I think it's great you're keeping her offline I wish more parents did such.

[@m.maclellan7147]

Okay, replying here - as that's the only way I can. Has KZbin changed WHEN you can comment on a video ? My phone isn't giving me that "box" where I can start a new comment. Only can reply ?! Very odd !? 🤔

[@m.maclellan7147]

Also, not letting me change so I can watch in horizontal view - only vertical!?

[@Kacpa2]

Yeah its a bane of modern "parenting" with almoat everyone lazily slapping a tablet in front of the children.

[@derepischekeks1475]

@@m.maclellan7147 I think it's likely an issue with your device. I always have issues with various apps when my phone gets older than a few years.

[@andyrharris]

My wife and I have done the same, I feel like our child should get the opportunity to decide for themself when to have an digital presence/footprint..

[@second0banana]

"I get to love this child for the rest of my life" is such a powerful way to phrase that.

[@joycependleton4117]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@anna-katehowell9852]

Welcome Baby Brain!

[@TheBitcheroo]

I read that wrong and thought "who tf is Brian?" and started reading the other comments until it clicked 😂

[@lee-sq6ob]

I just immediately started crying when you said "the most exciting thing is that I seem to be good at it." To hear you speak with confidence about your capability in this role that you chose for yourself--you as a woman with ADHD, when we are constantly feeling inadequate, when we spend our lives living with so much shame--to hear this makes me so incredibly happy for you, Jessica. These realizations that we are succeeding at something are so important, and to be able to realize that about MOTHERHOOD is just...so beautiful and so freaking special. Because when you are a mother, what could be more important? I watched the video about your struggles in the postpartum period, and I think given how you feel now, it just really shows that when we get the support we need (anyone, with ADHD or not), it's possible to thrive. So so much love to you and your whole fam ❤

[@mstakenidentity]

It took me right back to when my son (now 13) was born. The happy amazement that I not only could DO this, I was kicking goals at it. Part of it was I think that the stuff that threw off some other people never threw me off, because my undiagnosed brain was always chaotic, and I had learned to work with that, so the chaos of a baby wasn't scary or new.

[@francescam.6999]

Yes so true. I also think I am good at it. Being a mother is easy for me. But I had to learn to also prioritze myself.

[@theresaweiler6775]

So, I'm Jessica's co-author, book buddy, and all around pal, and I want to affirm that she is a GREAT MOM and Baby Dragon is one of the World's Most Excellent Babies. I am also a mom. I have four kids, ages 8 to 18, and I worked when they were babies, so I want to normalize something else: Jessica, it is absolutely normal to feel heartbroken about being separated from your baby to work. It doesn't mean you are making the wrong choice or that you don't love your work. It's just an emotionally difficult thing to do for a lot of parents! For those of you who don't or didn't feel that way, however...THAT'S OKAY TOO. I didn't. When I was with my babies, I was with my babies. When I was at work, I was at work. I loved my kids and I loved my work, but somehow they didn't overlap in my brain. That may be to do with my neurotype (also neurodivergent but with a different profile from Jessica), my background, my trauma history, or just a quirk of my personality, but I didn't miss my kids when I was at work. At all. At the time I kept this secret, but I'm shouting it now. All love and support to Jessica and other parents who go through it, but It wasn't my experience. I am still and always have been a really good mom. ❤

[@myoldaimsnwastaken]

Thank you so much for saying this!! I can't stop crying because this has been my experience, and I've always felt like people were judging me. I had my first child right after the pandemic stay-at-home orders started, and it was a nightmare when my maternity leave ended. Due to some health concerns with my child, the lack of support due to social distancing, and my own executive dysfunction, I had an incredibly hard time trying to work from home. When I did finally go back in person because my mental health was in shambles and I needed a change, people kept asking me if I missed my baby. I definitely got a few weird faces when I said no. My husband and I moved before we had our second, and we decided for numerous reasons to wait until baby #2 was weaned before I looked for another job. One of the reasons though was that I didn't want to face the pressure of looking like a "bad mom" again. Thanks again for sharing. It means a lot to have this validation.

[@theresaweiler6775]

@@myoldaimsnwastaken oh I'm so glad my message reached you! I don't want parents...especially moms... to experience shame or think they are not good enough or loving enough because their emotional experience of parenting doesn't match what is expected.

[@brittany281]

Thank you! I was struggling a lot after my first and felt a "weird" sense of relief going back to work, because that was a place I knew I was capable. Having everyone 1) tell me how depressing it would be, then 2) judging me for not feeling that, just made my whole experience harder. Having a kid is honestly so dramatic and weird in this day & age, it's nice that we have more freedom of choice but the fact that it isn't the standard or that we get there by so many different routes and at different times (versus a traditional timeline people 50 years or so experienced) also means it can feel really lonely and we face almost more expectations and judgements because our one path never matches everyone else's.

[@NicolaMaxwell]

I felt so guilty when I was working and not there for my eldest son every day then I felt guilty for not working as I wasn't providing as much. Mum guilt is real! No matter what we do we will find Mum guilt we don't deserve. ❤🙏🏼

[@shoepanda]

Thanks for sharing this. I have no idea which type of parent I would be if I became one, and people sharing their perspectives about how there are multiple modes in which to be a good parent is comforting, even if I end up never having kids.

[@Pinkosaurus]

My son is 19 and still my most enjoyable hyper fixation. I believe that the single most important parenting skill is self awareness. That one unlocks all the rest. So I predict you will be a fantastic parent

[@theanadevine]

That is a whole sermon. Yes. Thank you for this.

[@RikerManeuver]

By self awareness, do you mean realising what you are doing?

[@mjjjermaine]

This is the sweetest comment ever, love to you and your family!

[@tardisgater]

"are you depressed or sad" that is SUCH A GOOD question. You did amazing getting help when you did. It's such a hard thing to get treatment for, and such a hard time to have to do even more things. Seriously, amazing.

[@livvy6696]

In Canada, everyone gets at least 12 months of maternity leave, which you can spread out the benefits to 18 months if you like. It's barbaric that this is not the standard in every developed country.

[@HowtoADHD]

I agree!!

[@hypergalacticnoodles]

ok but if she's a freelancer, she doesn't really get free time from a boss 😂 in my country we have 2 years maternity leave, but you get an income throughout that time even if you don't have a job, but it's way less than what your salary would be on a leave

[@carmenjoydoucette8488]

Like you, I have the same 12-18 month bias, but even here contract workers don't get EI benefits. Every female doctor I know has taken only 6 months of mat leave, as their licencing has certain criteria. Either way, it's entirely unjust that people in the States may or may not qualify for six weeks of unpaid leave.

[@hypergalacticnoodles]

@@carmenjoydoucette8488 that is terrible

[@mariannetfinches]

I hadn't realised how brutal it was until a close friend got to the end of her (1year) parental leave & had to put her kid in daycare. Even then it felt way too soon (to both of us)! I'm fairly certain that future generations will look back & think of us as inhumane. Because hopefully parental leave will continue to extend worldwide

[@kingdnate]

Congrats and welcome Baby Dragon!

[@OldManSparkplug]

I have ENORMOUS respect for both of you in taking care to keep your baby's privacy. As an ADHDad, I strongly recommend baby wraps or something like an Ergo carrier. It's hands free parenting, it's baby transport, it's free dopamine, and it's a safe space for the little dragon to sleep. I could not possibly recommend it more.

[@toonarmycaptain]

Attention Deficit Hyper Dad is an acronym I am stealing

[@lisaroper421]

2nd the wrap! I loved mine so much. I even upgraded to a woven wrap so that you can tie it how you want with no sagging!

[@waggermama]

And it can also be a fab hyperfocus 😂

[@amandakesterson224]

Also an ADHDer and I couldn't have had more of an opposite experience. The wrap was torture. No matter what we were hot, and he couldn't adjust himself and having him right there, always adjusting his head or his back because he was hot.

[@workinprogressjess1099]

Oooo YES! Babywearing saved my life, saved my sanity! I even got involved in my local babywearing nonprofit to learn how to wrap my baby with different slings, carriers, wraps, they were very helpful and can even become friends!

[@JosetteBadger]

Congratulations!!! Missing your baby while you’re at work is completely normal. I heard a story of a medical resident who started having heart palpitations after return to work with a tiny baby at home. She was hooked her up to an EKG machine and she was actually having runs of ventricular tach for a minute or two at time (for reference that is a shockable rhythm! Except she was awake). She got treated for her heart arrhythmia, and sent home with extra time with her baby. I say this to point out that the physiologic stress on your body missing your child is a real physical thing. Normal. Being super emotional: normal. Also normal to miss your baby but also be relieved to have time for adult thoughts when away from them. Welcome to the mom club!!!

[@marlaedington6471]

I agree it is normal for sure to be sad when always from your baby. I had to return to work for financial reasons. I was lucky enough to get 3 months off for each of my 2, and unfortunately I suffered from pretty severe PPD after my 1st, which took 6 weeks to be discovered..that was 25 years ago, and it wasn’t talked about much at that time , and I was in denial. I found out a few years ago that I had ADHD and I wonder if that contributed to me getting PPD? Either way, the sadness from being away from my babies, and guilt, was real and has never gone away. Now it is called regret. But my 2 kids are adults now and they are adjusted, hard-working, independent individuals. The only issue is when my daughter had her baby and decided to stay home and brought up the fact that I didn’t. She obviously wished that I did and it made me feel very guilty. But I know I was still a good mom, and I did what I had to do. Your kids will just do that to you sometimes! (Say things that hurt you) They still love you!

[@xiola]

Honestly I was worried you were actually going to "reveal" the baby, I'm very relieved you didn't. (congrats btw!)

[@treefrog101]

Yeah, me too. I hesitantly clicked and relieved to know Baby's privacy will be respected. Phew.

[@hyperfocus6910]

Same!

[@kennethwelch9944]

You are going to be a great mom, because you as you are. And BIG congrats with the baby, and the new "Map" ☺.

[@theanadevine]

You really ARE doing so good!!! So proud of you for recognizing your parenting skills to yourself and publicly.

[@bonessasan]

I know this will possibly be a strange comment, but there's something about hearing you talk that just makes me happier. Like a Pavlovian response. I'm so glad to hear things are going well for the three of you overall!

[@NikkiRichmond-v8e]

As a mom with ADHD of 3, 2 who have Autism and ADHD, you are doing great! It can be tough and overwhelming. But watching your children grow into capable adults and overcome and work with their challenges is so worth every minute!!!

[@yavoth5850]

Well done on respecting the child's privacy, and congratulations and best wishes to you!

[@jennX2146]

I used to tell myself on those hard days that if my baby was sheltered, fed, cared and loved for each day, then the rest was just icing on the cake. Be gentle with yourself too. You are doing great!

[@mquinn5186]

Such important points. The OVERWHELM!!! The changing demands on executive function, PPD, other mental health challenges, the math!! The need for longer maternity need. The new tasks to do. The pressure. Oh boy. Truly, it's no wonder so many women are first diagnosed with ADHD after becoming a parent. Those who were able to mask and get by before, just can't anymore. 💗

[@jadelincraig1872]

❤my heart is walking around outside of me. That is a beautiful way to describe motherhood ❤

[@AuTom9890]

I have a 6 month old nephew and being an Uncle is the BEST JOB EVER!

[@DieFarbeLila88]

My nephew is 1,5 year now and every day I am grateful that I am childless. Like - baby nephew was adorable and amazing but atm, i really don’t envy my sister

[@Chaotic_Pixie]

I’m not a mom… a personal choice for many reasons… but I have amazing nieces and when you said, “I get to love her for the rest of my life” boy howdy did that hit me in the feels because I feel the same way about my nieces. I know how I feel about them… I can only imagine how intense that feeling is when the tiny human is one you’ve raised from day 1. Welcome to the wide world Miss Dragon, official Baby Brain.

[@evelienzeilstra9237]

I'm so happy for you and baby dragon!! Also, it's really cool that you are keeping her off the internet!

[@evileve5958]

Had my baby a year before you and I can relate so much! Never be ashamed for your tears. Your emotions are always real and valid. I love how you compared the baby world to a new map, this helps me reframe it even better, because sometimes I miss not being able to do as much non-mum stuff (although it's becoming more again). All the best for the three of you!

[@ZaneiYah]

I'm 38, have Sle Lupus, Fibromyalgia,OCD,PTSD,and ADHD, and you've helped me so much, on the mental side! You're so courageous, informative, comforting,and inspiring.Thank you! Congratulations on your little Beauty.❤ Shalawam. 🙏🏽♥️♥️♥️

[@rachellemazar7374]

I do admire you. I suffered from post partum depression that left untreated for 3 months put at danger of suicide. I’m glad you got treatment and I’m proud of you for talking about it. You and your partner are doing so well. Bless you and your baby.

[@zb2363]

Now you are Mama Brain! ❤ Congrats again to both of you! I too suffered after my child was born, so glad you asked for help and got it - I wish doctors would prepare women better with resources and to let them know it’s not only ok to ask for help but it’s the best thing you can do if you need it , for everyone. Enjoy your little one and I’m so glad you’re feeling good about your parenting. ❤

[@SparklingSophia11]

Congratulations!!! You've helped me so much with my ADHD, and I'm so happy for you!

[@sherilgreen7495]

Jessica you are doing a wonderful job with your channel and now with your baby dragon. I didn’t know that I had ADHD until I was 85. It was thanks to your videos that I found out why I have been scatterbrained all my life and so disorganized. I had three boys and a couple of miscarriages within six years. They all survived and have turned into good human beings in spite of my less than stellar parenting. I don’t think anyone will ever be a perfect parent. Just do the best you can.

[@sckilham]

Welcome Baby Dragon!! And congratulations Jessica ❤️ I love your analogy of unlocking a new map, that is so true!! It's overwhelming at first because everything is new, but once you start exploring your new "map" (aka life and routine) you learn things that you could've never known before. I think parenting with ADHD comes with it's own unique challenges, but I've also found I'm a great parent in lots of unique ways too. My ADHD helps me be silly, creative, empathetic and so many other things that my 3 year old and 8 week old love. I can't wait to hear more about your parenting journey, as you choose to share of course!

[@CarlottaRomero124]

My sibling did this with their partner when their kid was born. It's SO fantastic you're keeping your kid's privacy up to them when they're old enough to decide! Well done on the little dragon!

[@BlueberryPie-zq6so]

Thanks for respecting Baby Dragon's privacy! -someone whose parents did respect my privacy, and I am eternally grateful! I have stories from classmates of everything being posted online from their life. Idea- Maybe a dragon stuffed animal for the background shelf instead of a framed photo like what people usually keep at their office? It would make a nice easter egg for long time viewers.

[@theanadevine]

Crying is so physiologically important. And for the next few years, it will be difficult to be the most crying-est person in your home. Baby Dragon will hold the championship belt, and having shed your tears when you need to helps you help her with her big emotions. It ain't easy being a baby, a baby parent, or a wyvern.

[@insertcheesypunhere]

hearing that it's Possible to be good at parenting as an adhd brain is such a relief. i want so badly to have kids. the only reason i dont have any yet is due to finances and not having anyone to have a kid with. it's such a relief to see someone who talks about how you Can be a parent.

[@jessicazimmer8910]

"I get to love her for the right of my life" paired with "the antidepressants are working" is perfect. Congratulations to you and your partner on this amazing new adventure.

[@kellylausman259]

Jessica, you are an inspiration to so many of us! I love that you are keeping baby Dragon out of the public eye and maintaining her privacy. It’s beautiful to see that through all your struggles, you are still winning at life. We’re all sending your sweet family so much love!!!❤️❤❤❤

[@SheWhoWalksSilently]

As an ADHD mom, I wouldn't mind a little ADHD parent content. You sound very familiar the way you talk about your baby, I felt the same way, and now she's a toddler and I'm having a fantastic time. It was so hard when she was so little to leave her for any reason. I was prepared for the PPD, but not for the incredible separation anxiety I felt when I wasn't with her, especially when she was a newborn I was so afraid of her dying in her sleep, even though I knew I was over worried about it, I wanted to know she was doing alright, and I couldn't feel her kicking me anymore. I think she felt the same because she was very clingy and a contact napper, so I think it worked out.

[@miscellane245]

Congratulations and welcome back! It was becoming a mom that made a bunch of my "character flaws and personality quirks" detrimental. It was finding you that made me see what that really was and gave me so much validation. I'm 44 and my daughters are 7 and 4 now. Part of that late start was my own fear of being bad at it and needing to have certain things in place before I could start trying. I have to shake off the shame of not being the perfectly organized mother that my own mom was for me all the time. But we're good. It's definitely an active process! Thank you for all you do and again, congratulations.

[@stephenie44]

I’m glad your partner could help with your perspective about sad vs depressed. When my depression is not managed, I’m either numb, or I cry constantly at things that aren’t even necessarily sad. Like, a neutral commercial about cheerios will make me feel the woes of the whole world. When my depression IS managed, I cry at sad things like it makes sense that I would, and I also get to feel other emotions, and emotions actually get processed. I think it’s very natural for there to be a lot of big emotions involved with being a new parent. Congratulations on your 7 month old baby dragon. ❤

[@Morna777]

This. Normal emotional range vrs "why tf am I crying over a sweater commercial?"

[@MJB-HAMILL]

Girl, you were about to cry, and my eyes started to overflow. My son is one, and I'm a single Nerodivergent mom. Luckily, I was blessed to find someone who is basically a father figure to my child. The emotions are surreal. It was and still is very hard, especially going through certain traumatizing events that I shouldn't have had to prep for the last minute. Please make a book on. "How to be an ADHD PARENT ." Omg! That would be amazing 😂😂

[@MJB-HAMILL]

Sh!t, I will freaking help you, lol! Thank you for you and your channel. You have no idea how much you have helped me with just accepting myself (I say this while crying like my one year old lol)

[@Janne_Mai]

I recommend the podcast Childproof to everyone - both hosts have ADHD too, and they have wonderfully weird, respectful neurodivergent families and a lot of strategies to share! So lovely to hear it's going well. You've got this! ❤

[@tempesttking5715]

❤

[@dragonm4364]

“Depressed or sad, because sad is a good thing..” wow beautiful quote!! Congrats on the baby!

[@chloe2264]

How to Baby would be an amazing second channel for you. Parenting is a massive massive topic.

[@offairhead]

Aww!! Baby Brain is here! Welcome Dragon Brain!!

[@duckie.louise]

This made me cryyyyy. Go hug that baby!! What a sweet mama 🥹💞

[@Channelinterrupted]

Girl, I understand that feeling about not being with your baby. That doesn't change even when they're older. Especially when we have to work .. 😢 but you're doing your best and your baby feels your love ❤

[@HowtoADHD]

aw thank you for that, felt the hug through the screen :)

[@jillkirson6048]

Oh biggest hugs. I had such a hard time being without my son AND I love working

[@readerslive1000lives]

I like how you described parenthood as opening a new map and new quests. One one of my fears as someone who already struggles socially that having a baby would not be good for my social needs. That made me feel a lot better 😊

[@lydianici1696]

congrats on your baby!!

[@theanadevine]

I never felt more feelings than after my baby was born. I couldn't watch NBA games because of the intense love and care I felt for every human being, and watching them bump into each other or have a hard time was completely overwhelming for me. I didn't ever stop feeling those feelings, but after a lot of therapy, time, meds, and sleep, and a couple years, I've grown big enough to hold and move through these feelings. Plus, huge aspects of mainstream society are complete bullshit and the care we owe ourselves and each other is so freaking obvious and in stark contrast when a baby human arrives and shows the crap for what it is. So that's another huge HUGE intensifier that takes a LOT to integrate.

[@Microwaive]

I'm an ADD parent to a (now) 4 year old. I wish you love and happiness in your journey as parents. I've been watching your channel for many, many years. You're the person who helped me start down a path of self reflection that made me realize my ADD was not just a struggle. From one parent to another, thank you for all you do.

[@penelopeoftheshire]

While I've never been pregnant, my understanding is that emotions are dialed up to 15 after the baby arrives, and that's combining with ADHD emotion already being harder to regulate, and exhaustion through the roof. You're doing an amazing job, and it's wonderful that you're respecting your baby's privacy until she's ready to make that decision for herself. Congratulations to you and your partner on Baby Dragon's arrival!!

[@MaineCoonMama18]

"I'm getting to have a fuller life than I thought that I would be able to have." So beautiful, and I really relate to that sentiment! I had a mystery illness for years that turned out to be a severe sleep disorder. As a teenager and younger adult, I didn't know if I'd ever be able to have a full time job, go to college, or be a parent. Now I'm doing much better, and I'm slowly ticking off boxes of things I wasn't sure I'd get to do. Also, I'm new to this ADHD journey and so appreciate both your sharing of knowledge and your example of everything we can do with ADHD. ❤

[@BLynn]

Loved seeing how much being a parent impacts you. I almost cried with you thinking about my kiddos.

[@angelagardner1123]

Congratulations! So happy for you and your partner! Welcome baby Dragon!

[@paulstejskal]

I'm so glad to follow you through this journey. Your honesty and transparency, while remaining objectively private, is endearing. It shows that you're not some super ADHD figured out everything together person, but a human like us. It makes you relatable and we are all along saying "go Jessica!". Please take care of your family. We are so excited with you. :)

[@timewithnicole]

Congratulations on baby Dragon !! As someone thinking about becoming parent in the future, it was so comforting to hear your answers to everything. I love the idea of you approaching it like you’ve unlocked a “new map” in your life 💕

[@zeldalovergirl]

Thank you so much for being honest about how hard it is and can be! I have a son who's 19 months, and another baby on the way, and it is indeed hard and terrifying and I miss my meds, but they are 1000% worth it. It feels so supported to have someone who's so well-versed in this talk about the struggles, thank you so so much!

[@britneycampbell8696]

So thankful and lucky that I’ll have these videos years down the road to help me learn to balance my own executive dysfunction while being the executive function for a new tiny human ❤️ so excited for you!!! I’ve been watching your stuff since high school and you’ve helped me so much and I’m ecstatic for your new journey!!❤️❤️❤️

[@lisamilby]

Ironically, I was talking to my son about his ADHD memory issues and pulled up this channel to recommend. Then saw you had just published this one! Perfect timing! I'm now listening as I sew a dress for my granddaughter, so it does get better!! I got both of my ADHD boys to adulthood and both of them are moved out and married without any input or help from me 😂 It's hard being ADHD married to ADHD raising ADHD, but you'll get through it! Totally enjoy that little bundle of joy while she's little!!!

[@pjmariano6848]

I've been watching your content for a couple of years now, ever since I got an ADHD diagnosis as an adult. I am so happy and excited for you to be a mom! I just feel compelled to comment now because motherhood! I love being a mother and have been for the last 10 years. Becoming a mom has been one of the most important changes in my life, and it has also been the reason that drove me to get a diagnosis. Looking at my daughter now, and the struggles we're having getting her a diagnosis (for ADHD too), and the ups and downs of motherhood, and the intense love I feel for her--I feel so much solidarity with you.

[@mendozasyl]

Yasss to the entire video!! I was diagnosed after having my kiddo, and O. M. G. Prior to diagnosis, not knowing what in the world was happening with me was the wildest experience ever. I was still crying when dropping her off at daycare earlier this year (when she turned 2yo). This video validates soo much. Thank you!!

[@NessaOfDorthonion]

Speaking if tracking baby naps and when they ate, how much they ate, etc., I can't recommend cubtale enough! I still use it with a 13 month old baby. You can add other "children" to it too, so maybe you can add another section for yourself to make sure you're eating regularly 😉 I find it's a lot easier to stay regular with eating now that my baby is also eating. I know eating is very social, so I just get to more chances to bond with baby!

[@HowtoADHD]

Oh wow that’s brilliant!!

[@raelynn75]

This is so validating as a mom with ADHD who had three kids while not knowing she had ADHD. It really is an executive function nightmare. I love how real you are about things so far. Thank you for sharing your heart with us.

[@annaboda08]

Fantastic! Congratulations! Unfortunately I felt that as I can't take good care of myself and my life, I wouldn't be able to take care of another human. And was too scared to take on such a responsibility. And was worried that it's something one cannot regret or change. So now regretting not doing it while I could and probably back then my ADHD was less horrible as over the years. Wish I believed that we can have another life;)

[@BandChoirChick09]

After seeing so many kids go through trauma because of being put on the internet for the world to see, I am SO HAPPY to see you keeping your sweet dragon out of the spotlight. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have so many people around the world want to know more about the baby and you trying to keep your privacy. I am happy that you’re working to balance it all. You and your partner got this!

[@Cbear2479]

Thank you so much for being so honest about how it feels to be away from your daughter. I felt EXACTLY the same way and used literally the same words trying to explain to people why I couldn’t even be a few feet away from my first child for the first while after she was born. And now, 10 years on, we can handle a plane ride apart for a week! But missing them never goes away completely. 🥰

[@SuperBrieBear]

Thank you so much for your time and wonderful energy. It is beyond appreciated. And I love the Baby Dragon avatar ❤🐉❤

[@samanthakl447]

I am so so happy for you! Watching this video I just feel the love and wholesomeness radiating off of you as you talk about your experiences. Thank you for sharing these personal things with us. As someone who has been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD since grade 4 (I'm currently 33 now) I really struggle with my desires to be a mother and getting pregnant. It is very overwhelming to think of everything and how my thinking and just everything will have change. Thank you for sharing your experiences. It gives me hope that I can be a mother too and that I can be successful in this endeavor. Thank you so so much! You are inspiring 💕 Congratulations to you and a warm welcome to little baby dragon!! ❤

[@JanaVerseveldt]

Congratulations! My twins are now 6 months old and I found that they help my executive functioning. Because I'm so busy, there's no room for procrastinating. On turn, there's no way to forget stuff, because I HAVE to do it the moment I have time for it. The daily structure of feeding, diapering, cleaning bottles etc is working wonders on our neurospicy household. I never expected that, but it's our reality.

[@derrickferry8872]

Hi Jessica! Amazing video ❤ Im an ADHD person who's in a relationship where we've chosen to take the path without children, but i want you to know that as a male and childless adult I still see the massive value of your content even when a video focuses on an area that may not be directly relevant to my now. Example from this video: I actually realized that I too may be mixing up depressed and sad. Your realization with your partner made me reflect and ask myself the question. It sounds like your dealing with a situation 'mindfield" of challenges related to hyperfocus, self-compassion, and emotional regulation on top of the EF stuff. And you're pushing through like a champ. A human with flaws, but one hell of a champion and you're admitting that you needed help. So inspiring. Ill watch that all day every day. ❤ Not to mention that I'm still learning new stuff and building empathy for others situations. Anyways, all this to say. Im a fan for life because of what you have built, and im excited see what adventure we'll all go on tomorrow. You and the How to ADHD team keep up the amazing work.

[@sherrijennings9309]

You are doing such an amazing job! leaving your baby when they're still so little is hard, and even more so when it's your first. I found that having something that needs my attention, other than my baby really helped with my PND. It gave me a sense of self and purpose that i felt like I lost being a milk bar to a baby and doing chores (as important as those things are). I'm sure you're getting LOTS of advice as a new mum, but to add my bit, its important to find a balance between maintaining the things that were important to you before having a baby, and caring for your baby. Some time apart helped me appreciate my baby more when we were together

[@sweethaven5]

3:07 🎉Congratulations!! I wondered 😂 Good luck, you will do fine. I had adhd, depression, anxiety and NOT on meds at the time I was pregnant, but I hadn’t been diagnosed yet. After my son turned 8-9, I was dx with PTSD, depression, anxiety. When he was 23, I was finally dx with adhd. My son is a paramedic/firefighter. He knows my struggles and helps me, but I know I’ve passed on some of my mental health issues. Fortunately we have great mental counselors. Thanks again for sharing ❤Hug that Baby Dragon❤she is adorable!!! ❤

[@katherinecollins8869]

I feel connected to you Jess. I had my daughter on the same day and love the idea that there is another baby dragon exactly the same age, also with an ADHD mum, on the other side of the world. I adore my daughter so much, am keeping her off social media and I forgot to announce her birth properly until yesterday. So far, I'm taking things one stage at a time and trying to catch myself whenever I start worrying about how to parent a teen. I hope you are able to stay present too 😊 Love to you and your family ❤

[@SeaDee20]

Brilliant video! It takes around 2 years for your body to fully recover and she is still so little, so be kind to yourself as it is a constant learning experience and adjustment that just keeps evolving as they learn more too. Intense as you say is the perfect description of parenting but you are doing a great job. A wise individual told me how if you’re lucky you get 10-13 years where you are the most important person in your child’s life but equally how quickly that time goes so take your time and work out the balance between work and parenting that suits you, we’ll be here for you when you feel ready. 😊

[@evansfamily8156]

Thank you for the tears! It is really a nice feature to notice if one deals with clinical depression. When the tears don't flow and sadness or fear are not expressed they are offen substituted with the secondary emotion of anger or a need to dominate. Tears of joy the same way. Really feeling the emotion allows one to get all the chemical kicks and map memories that will float one along during to tough times. Doing Highs and Lows every day is maintenance and cause one to look for those nuggets to share.

[@mariac4602]

It's so lovely to see the pure joy on your face when you talk about your baby girl. And excellent parenting decision to not share your precious baby on your channel. I understand the worry -most parents worry about their children, their parenting decision, etc etc. but remember to relax, enjoy and breathe :) And the sadness of leaving your baby.....pay attention to that feeling. If you want to take more time off, to spend more time with her, if it 'feels wrong' to be away from her, then go ahead and stay home. There are years and years of your life to work, but these precious baby years are fleeting. Be a full-on heart and follow what it's telling you.

[@1Aroe1]

Thank you for sharing such a raw and real update! I've considered having a child but have felt so under-prepared by the NT world which always just says "it'll be the greatest joy of your life and you'll just forget the hard stuff!" I appreciate having a chance to know and understand more about the hard stuff before living it.

[@katm8289]

Jess, this is so beautifully vulnerable and it means so much to see and just feel less alone as a fellow ADHD mom. The big ADHD feels of the wonder my daughter's beauty hasn't worn off 3 years later. And the overwhelm gets easier as you adjust and tweak your toolkit.

[@rendleshetheywilliamskat-r9068]

Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share about depression and your feelings returning! Anxious and excited really do feel the same- it is often a matter of perspective. It is also okay to feel both!

[@SlinkyGaming]

Congrats on having a healthy child! I never thought about sharing a child online but I wouldn't have ever doing it myself, as I would have thought it would have been inappropriate since the child can't give consent. One of the things I've had is this weird long term perspective and what I don't have is the short term perspective all that much, which makes the here and now really hard foe me. I'm not even a parent or am even married.

[@JohnnyPDisco]

Having my first child really got me to focus more on my physical and mental health. It does really change your perspective and prioritize things differently.

[@lazydaisy411]

My son is 10 months old now. I’m currently going through very similar things, which is why I was so excited when you announced you were becoming a mom. I need all the advice and help, too!

[@Lbd_lbd_]

Hi Jessica, Thanks for sharing a bit about your motherhood journey. I can totally relate to what you said about feeling heartbroken when you are not close to her. I experienced this strong feeling, however, I only got diagnosed when my daughter was 22 - thanks to your channel. I become a better person to be a good Mum for her and it seems that you are already expanding your possibilities and using your power to transform you and the world also for her. That’s so beautiful. Wishing you all the best! ❤

[@Charlie-ib3du]

Hey, congrats to you all! Totally understand and support your choice to tell us in your own time and to respect baby dragon's privacy. I'm a trans man and also gave birth to a daughter and I also got post partum depression, and I also felt like walking around without her was like missing a part of me, like I couldn't protect her anymore. Kudos to you for being brave enough to acknowledge your feelings and also when you need help - it can be so incredibly hard. Can't wait to see new (parenting related) adhd content!!

[@BumbleSmeeBee]

As a fellow ADHD mom of now 2 kids, my heart goes out to you so much!! I will say parenting as an ADHD mom does become a lot more complicated when your child is also ND but maybe not the same flavour of neurospicy as you, haha. I do wish there was more support for neurodivergent parents - like I would love to read all the books on parenting and neurodivergent conditions in kids but I have ADHD and can barely finish reading a single chapter. Phew. Trying to muddle through as best I can. Thank you so much for sharing and giving space for the rest of us to share too. Congratulations on your baby and for working so hard on yourself and growing that little human - all the work you’ve done for yourself will continue to help you in your journey. 💖

[@chelseathomas7616]

Thank you for sharing this!!! I totally relate/relates to all of this: the multi-hyper-focusing on all the things at one time, the survival mode, all of the stages, my heart running around outside of my body, missing her being inside me, etc! It gets better with time. I had my daughter Jan. 2023. Listening to you talk I was like, “YES! This is EXACTLY how I felt!” I am SO sorry you had postpartum depression. That was another level of “fun” on top of regular anxiety, depression, and ADHD with NO meds because of possible side effects for baby! 😅 From the sounds of it you are doing a great job! But yes, so much pressure for keeping ourselves and the tiny human alive! ❤❤❤❤ Congratulations! Continue to love that little girl to pieces.

[@anaisthomas5553]

I just feel exactly the same as you ! The intense unconditional love, the sadness and the joy. Keep going you are an amazing mom you and her can be sooooo proud of you❤

[@autismenlightenment]

I bought your book several months back because i knew you were postpartum and i wanted to support you. ❤

[@jele77]

Crying with you ❤❤❤ love how open you have been in this one. Congratulations

[@snoopy104]

Love it love it love it! Both your joy and your tears. You're doing great. It's perfectly healthy to not want to be separated from your daughter. Don't box yourself in. Your emotions aren't lying. Doesn't mean you need to quit your job, but it may mean you would be more comfortable with alterations to your work/family balance. As much as I enjoy your videos, I would never want you to sacrifice your family for them. Either way, we're rooting for you!

[@jessiagnew8864]

This was one of the most incredible, honest, and relatable videos I have EVER watched on KZbin. You are amazing and I thank you so much for this video and for your book and for everything you do! It’s not only helping me but it’s helping my son as well. There really aren’t adequate words to express how moving this video was to me!!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart! 💜 💜💜💜💜

[@warriormamma8098]

Congrats & blessings! I am glad you talked about the heartbreaking part. I felt judged for not being able to work after baby 2 & 3. I had no choice after baby 1 from ages 2 - 4.5 yrs. I knew I took meds n did therapy for severe anxiety w depression but was not diagnosed AuDHD until mid 40’s. I was to go back to work after 3 months but I mentally was a mess. I could not do it. So 24.5 yrs out of last 28 I have stayed home. I tried working for one year when our youngest with GAD, AuDHD daughter turned 16 & transitioned from me having to homeschool her to her doing it online. We were a mess. It has alienated me from society I feel that not only did I stay home but have for so long. People think I am entitled or lazy or selfish. Nope. I am just struggling to keep us alive. Gifted daughters, so sweet & hard working but they have mental health struggles & high support needs. We as women need to support and not gaslit. We need to not feel threatened or jealous due to other women’s choices or situations. Let’s just love each other. Same for dads.

[@silver3roses]

As a new mom, I’ve definitely become more sensitive to mom feelings but you really described it in such a way that I really connected and had to try to stop crying at work. ❤

[@mirandamota3537]

All of this is SO real and true! You're doing amazing. My son is 2.5 now and I wish I'd heard this when he was a baby; you said all the things I didn't have the words to explain about what was so hard. Also, that feeling of "I shouldn't be away from them" never goes away but it does ease as they become more independent, making work more enjoyable!

[@brussell9609]

You are doing great! And will continue to do great! All the feels of the depression are so hard, butbit does get better! As an ADHD Mom,I can say first hand, you'll figure out what works for you and Baby Dragon! And lol, when you do, she'll grow...and things will change a little more and you both will adapt and learn what works again. What worked for me was a consistent routine and daily list. Both were essential even more so when baby #2 came two years later! Both kids are teenagers now and do well with routines and lists (both have adhd too!)

[@AileenDaw]

Thank you for sharing ❤ do you think your partner would also be willing to share his experience? He is autistic and with that comes a lot of sensory things that makes the parenting experience different, too. I would love to hear you both ❤

[@TheeDoctorB52]

I'll mention that to her. 🙂

[@charmin78]

I appreciate how vulnerable and brave you are to share being in the mess of life too. I don’t have ADHD. I don’t have kids. I still watch because I love learning from your inquiries and how you keep leveling up.

[@janettrigwell8851]

Glad you are sharing. I was diagnosed with ADHD when my children were older. I wish I have known earlier. I also suffered with PND. You got this x

[@gosuke5]

Congratulations Jessica! Thank you for sharing your life, your insights, and your beautiful baby with us!!!!! As a parent of 2 ADHD children myself, I am so looking forward to your next phase of content, but please know that we are all in support of you taking care of yourself and prioritizing your child. Also-- please bring baby along for some of your videos! Love and prayers...