Body count and SEXUAL JEALOUSY: moving beyond the number

[@psychacks]

The number of a woman's previous sexual partners is often of interest to the men she dates. However, it's not immediately apparent why that should be the case. I argue that the sheer number might not be as important as many men believe, as this is actually being used as a heuristic to gauge other attributes of the woman in question, namely: her attraction and her ability to pair bond. I also discuss a surprising way in which a woman's sexual history comes to bear on relationship longevity. Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaO7c62HZ613e7M Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #dating #relationship

[@baroyahaquwahba9382]

Psychacks, u a bad man. Beautifullie thought out. I have a qeustion though, nonetheless, a lot of men if not most, who are not inclined to reason with themselves. Because of course being inclined to logic by nature doesnt dictate or qaulify the same being an intellectual. In my opinion it only stands as a marker for a greater potential in possibly resolving in to becoming the latter. But not to be so long winded, in short, my argument on the topic of virgins per say, is that inately men value virgins predominately for the sake of a woman's standards and expectations from a man having merit. When both men and women majorily seem not only oblivious to such concept but ultimately superficially relegate virginity from a woman as some preferable sexual wile. Im curious what mite you say relatively? Nevertheless, thank you for your contribution. A beautiful mind never gets old listening too. Good evening.

[@pescatoralpursuit1726]

Yeah Doc pretty sure it's immediately apparent and for all the reasons readily available in the comments. "Fucking her better than all who came before" is no advice, and beneath the dignity of your degree.

[@Invisibility397]

Here's the reality 11,840,000 18 to 55 American Men 80% = 9,472,000 Ostracized .. 20% = 2,368,000 [] while 11,470,000 18 to 55 American Women 90% = 10,323,000 [] oh and 5% American Men = 592,000 All Men do what Exactly? What the Fuck did they think was going to happen?....

[@beefsupreme694]

You should collaborate with apex mindset. His video series in the topic goes DEEP into what you touched on here and was a game changer for me. Sadly Its often the smaller channels that deviate from "women get their comeuppance" type material that provide any value in the red pill space.

[@TheBayzent]

@psychacks I have a question. If the woman has been intimate with, let's say, 4 men, and she is still single, why should I think it is going to be different for me? She has already failed to secure a parter 4 times, maybe she left, maybe the guys left, but the point still stands that she failed 4 times. What assures me I can safely invest and have children with that woman and that she will not divorce me or give my children horrible values?

[@bernibeckmann9753]

I care about a womans body count for the same reasons I care about my financial planners "former" gambling addiction.

[@drwayne_carter9115]

😂😂

[@samphelps856]

And yet you and the rest have never asked so you don't care that much (accountant talk)

[@francisdashwood1760]

I care about a woman's body count for the same reason I care whether or not my Arby's roast beef sandwich has been handled by 15 different employees before being passed around to all the customers, all without washing their hands, before it gets to me!

[@Rileyed]

Should judge on their behavior.

[@shanonkiyoshi4784]

😂 Your Financial Planner had an Addiction and you STILL use him? 🤣

[@CritterPop]

One man’s two years relationship is another man’s one night stand

[@EddyG0rdo]

Shit that’s the story for most people tho. A chick making one mistake and sleeping with a guy she likes and getting fucked over doesn’t make her damaged goods.

[@hotlucky5622]

Exactly.. i always cringe when I see men giving LTRs to weekend girls, and wedding rings to part time girlfirends at best.

[@hotlucky5622]

​@@EddyG0rdomistake?? Women are elaborate and tactical about sex, they make no mistakes.

[@EddyG0rdo]

@@hotlucky5622 deciding to trust someone and getting fucked over is a mistake. It’s not her fault. Now, fucking someone you know is gunna fuck you over? Not a mistake.

[@robkennedy5906]

A mistake... As in like she tripped fell and landed in his phallus?

[@tomobrien2628]

They don't lie to spare pain, they lie to save face and hope their chances of commitment don't get torpedo'ed!

[@Kreymore]

Yup. It's the old "my ex was an abuser" schpiel while discounting what they may have negatively contributed to that relationship. Which would decrease their odds of pairing up in the future. I'm sure there is a scientific term for this scenario.

[@JackAndTheBeanstalkr]

They lie for the same reason a used car dealer rolls back the odometer on a jalopy or olive oil is diluted with sunflower oil... to extract more from the buyer than the car is worth.

[@LARA-sg4bt]

They can also* this is very important. It is not black or white, it is black AND white

[@testthewest123]

In the end he is correct: There is nothing you can really emotionally gain as a man, from knowing very exactly what a woman did with her partners in the past. Even if you are the one that got (by far) more from her than any other man she had, you still get jealous that someone else had something in the past, that you "own" now and do not under any circumstances want to share.

[@charlesfinnegan7930]

Men are not trying to operate on emotions. The need to ensure paternity is the biological drive that causes men to question a woman's body count.@@testthewest123

[@rocket_scientist5353]

Never be the guy that pays for all the fun the other guys had.

[@eyeheartsushi2212]

Preach!

[@cris-yo1950]

Too late.

[@Twigins96]

Some of us learned the hard way

[@SKBottom]

​@@Twigins96 at least you learned.

[@JediTiga]

What's crazy is I feel like that sentiment has always been biologically programmed into me. To not raise another mans kids or give resources to a woman who's given her body for nothing. Why is it controversial or even has to be said? The sexual revolution really messed up a lot of people.

[@snezycolins4125]

It’s not jealousy, it’s just disgust. An absolute turnoff.

[@zombieboy937]

Why?

[@Silencerof]

@@zombieboy937 Because he invests emotional. Not fire and forget.

[@trca101]

Why exactly? What have you experienced?

[@maxdawg]

and if you know the biology of the vagina receiving an ejaculation, it gets even MORE disgusting. there are literal sperm wars going on inside these broads... with vaginal ph thrown WAAAAAY off = that smell we all hate. do NOT go down on women you do not know a/o trust.

[@david7384]

​@@zombieboy937because we are human men

[@SomeGuy-xf9bc]

Body count is like BMI. It's a gross indicator. It's not completely accurate, but it's still a really good indicator.

[@bandit7497]

as a personal example I have a female friend who had a low bodycount of 4 but decided to try casual sex recently. She was on Hinge for less than a week and matched with a 6'4 athletic guy. If you just ask her number it's not high but misses that context.

[@nickcorona3966]

@@bandit7497 yeah it's not just body count it's also the fact that the men they have slept with are relatively speaking way higher quality than what men get to sleep with. even if it's a low body count, chances are you don't measure up to her casual sex partners if she has any. relationship sex partners are almost irrelevant as long as they're not fake relationships to cover up what's really just casual sex. if a woman has engaged in any casual sex at all she's not relationship material.

[@bandit7497]

@nickcorona3966 I 100% agree Asking about whether she's had casual sex are way more important than asking about just the number and ultimately you will get the number from her answer too. Like if a woman can honestly say she's never had casual sex or been in a situationship then her bodycount probably isn't super high either. I also agree that women can fuck way above their league for casual sex than for relationships so her casual sex partners are what men should be concerned with. Either get a girl who never had casual sex or get a girl where you meet her casual sex standards.

[@markgamache6377]

Except BMI is nearly worthless.

[@razzdiamond6447]

​@@nickcorona3966 If a woman has engaged in any casual sex she's not relationship material at all? Many relationships start from a hookup on the first or second date, idk where you got that info from.

[@alexr6470]

Always judge of your woman by her past because her past is your future.

[@encouraginglyauthentic43]

Yeah if you are average.

[@mbg9650]

Men care about woman past; woman, for man future.

[@edheldude]

​@@encouraginglyauthentic43My man, look at celebrity divorces. You can be the top guy, literally one in a million, and be dropped on a whim.

[@cjview7398]

​@@edheldudethat's because women are rewarded during a divorce.

[@encouraginglyauthentic43]

@@edheldude When I say average I mean mentality.

[@matthagan9854]

The problem is that "7" average is also very sus. Women consistently lie to their partners about their body count. If they are willing to lie to someone they supposedly care about, why wouldn't they also lie on an anonymous survey?

[@danielr5343]

You my friend seem to have no experience whatsoever of lying to another person or being aware of why you lie.

[@Mr.Ambrose_Dyer_Armitage_Esq.]

@@danielr5343 How did you conclude that about Mr. Hagan?

[@delocon]

In my experience a woman will only lie when she perceives negative judgment. If, instead, you show enthusiasm (if you can) and you don't pass judgement upon her, she'll gladly tell you everything, and she's more likely to be a naughty little kitten with you too.

[@rayzerot]

Wut? People are very consistent. We are more honest about embarrassing things when we can be anonymous about it. You don't even need a study to prove this- do you even visit the Internet?

[@deonbrown4533]

Go cry about it. You have done nothing to deserve a girl with a low body count.

[@suhwateezea.214]

My ex girlfriend initially claimed 3 partners, one night when she was drunk she admitted to 30+ guys. I kicked her out that night

[@SKBottom]

Well done.

[@MrMelonMan96]

lol good man. How did that go down

[@suhwateezea.214]

@MrMelonMan96 she left quickly with tears in eyes, came back the next day to show off her backup boyfriend who was ghetto like a gang member and threatened me on my own property.

[@Zzz-vh3mu]

@@suhwateezea.214 Jesus Christ man nightmare

[@pratibhat777]

@@suhwateezea.214 and what was your count at the time?

[@cocohoco2979]

I learned a lot. I have this girlfriend who had SO much casual sex in the past. I tried to ignore this because who am I to judge her past; right now she's with me, and I know she loves me. The problem is that every time she mentions another man (sharing a story, something humorous, etc.) is about a man she slept with. So, I feel that as a constant reminder: nobody has made any effort to sleep with her, ANY, because she only went out with very handsome guys, so, if she met them, then she was already in the mood to have sex with them. These last few weeks, I started feeling less interested in her, and now I begin to understand why I'm having these emotions.

[@anyvideos6442]

U are beta bucks

[@cocohoco2979]

@@anyvideos6442 that could be the case lol, but she pays most of the time, she doesn't need my little money

[@YOU-iw4ur]

Get out of that relationship... She will cheat you in the future...

[@nonamenoname3005]

I deal with the same problem... And its a lot of pain and incomprehension on her side How did you surpass that? And when you say a lot How much mens she sletp with?

[@x9rtu3os1t8]

Been there to she shared story from BJ she did what a stupid ass lady I've got. Big turn off. Red flag. Don't afraid to throw them or else u might develop feelings. Immediately after she shared i pull it out and demanded a same treatment. Thankfully to dr orion i understand now why and what happened.

[@modehfy1352]

"The more partners she's had, the less likely your gonna be her best" in combination with the lack of sex men have means those men will never amount to her sexual expectations. And by those men, i mean MAJORITY.

[@st3vorocks290]

Here's the thing: I've known a few women who have had MUCH better sex with virgins than they had with experienced men. If a man has a ton of experience at getting himself off without consideration for his partner, he will not be very good. The virgins in these cases were fairly nerdy, so they already had quite a bit of knowledge to work with, and they cared enough to put the effort in to take care of their partner's pleasure.

[@SoSa_nl]

100% facts.

[@oic1968]

She won't ever be satisfied always looking for her next ex..

[@rafalrocks]

not necessarily. More doesn't mean better. Some guys, and girls, are just naturals and have the right equipment. Some dudes get lots of p*** but don't know what to do with it

[@magicalThinktank]

@@st3vorocks290 I hope that's sarcasm. Nothing needs more successful hands-on experience over theory than sex and surgeries. Men with exp tend to boost their ego by making sure they leave a permanent positive mark on her that no one who comes after would be able to match, so they DO care about satisfying them to the max, for their own benefit.

[@valentine1713]

Nah the higher the body count the more you will have to pay for the mistakes of other men. And honestly when does higher body count equate to higher sexual proficiency? For women, it doesn’t really mean she’s any better at sex because she’s had higher number of partners. It’s kind of a crappy deal honestly.

[@davida138]

Yep. I find high body count women are terrible in bed. They criticize. They want things done in a very specific way because they have learned exactly what they like. It's like sleeping with a sex coach. She will try and coach you into making the same moves that Chadwick von Chad made last month. "To the left. No to the right. Faster. Slower. Use your finger. No not that way.....until it just goes soft. No excitement. No passion. It's just sport to them. A low body count woman is excited, nervous, submissive, appreciative, passionate and enjoys intense pleasure.

[@davidturner1641]

yeah, he really doesnt want to admit the nightmare of our current society

[@theartificialrealms]

No for "her" mistakes "with" other men

[@valentine1713]

yea man i didn't think the air quotes were really necessary @@theartificialrealms

[@Billy-bc8pk]

@@davidturner1641He's part of the bluepillsociety that want to keep men under the thumb of the current zeitgeist.

[@your_royal_highness]

Men, have a good life related to work, friends, hobbies etc. first. Then, consider a relationship. Easier said than done….

[@detroitvcw]

Tough to do, and can be counter-intuitive at the same time. Considering the complexity of today's dating climate, you NEED experience to navigate in it, even if you can conceptualize it...the other/external factors tend to overshadow the logical concepts when you're actually in situation(s)...it takes practice and awareness/discipline. Female nature is not something that is comprehensive or taught without experience and logically deducing a fair share of women. We are different in MANY ways, and finding that out later in life or on the backend (say, your 40s), is not something you want to deal with...especially if youre freelancing, and not under some type of social/religious Covenant/structure.

[@sIMODINHO]

Best comment I've seen so far!

[@elainer8288]

Very important for both. Only people who are happy with their own lives can be happy with someone.

[@malekkushimuzik3580]

@@elainer8288 You think relationships are about happiness, not duty and responsibility.

[@elainer8288]

@@malekkushimuzik3580 You are right. I was just thinking from the point of view of a single person with no kids.

[@KalelKing-xn2uz]

Its not sexual jealousy its being disgusted with her mentality with sex, relationships, and giving men access to her body

[@CA-pj9pl]

You don't even have to ask. You can just observe them for a while and you will know.

[@Self-improving72]

I keep saying this..💯

[@andremotivation6561]

So basically men have to have swag, have game, be tall, intelligent, bad boy, rich, clout, be a leader but not be in control, have a bunch of resources, be charming and be good in bed...and the woman can just do whatever they want, be a starfish and have the ability to walk out whenever they want, what a time it is to be a heterosexual man, no wonder most men are checking out and I don't blame them

[@nammi895]

That's why being a man is hard, but it has its own rewards if you can work hard to be in top 10% club. Women treat men like jobs, so basically men are like a company. If you grow big enough then only it's worth it, otherwise 90% of startups fail

[@andremotivation6561]

@@nammi895 if that's the case I see why men today don't look at women, relationships or marriage the same. If everything is a "transaction" men really don't need to view women as "human" just an object then, since everyone can do whatever the hell the wanna do now..smh

[@CeceliPS3]

At this point, the next logical thing is to do what the classic men did - because classics never go out of style - treat them like objects, or good dogs. Feed them, pet them, play with them, but forget about real connection and friendship. You're the main character of your life and their just the extras.

[@nammi895]

@@andremotivation6561 ya man true it's going transactional day by day, Infact Dr Orion himself tells in another video romance and love is a poor man's game. that love, true caring relationship is only for movies, I've never seen one such in real life

[@nammi895]

@@CeceliPS3 yupp unfortunately that's the only way forward given current dating scenario. Divided by countries united by women ☕

[@filipeadad4549]

This man knows no fear

[@tharsismadeira8836]

He has the spine of which he often speaks.

[@mgtow6287]

If you really want to see his fearlessness, have a look at his interviews on Soft White Underbelly! The "normies" were losing their minds over there! The White Knights were riding in to defend the wymin's "virture". It was priceless, and a great interview!

[@53Strat]

@@mgtow6287 have a link of the particular interview in question?

[@The_Good_Bad_Ugly]

@@tharsismadeira8836 Spine and BALLS

[@Owl8511]

Indeed

[@ph3879]

Dude you started this channel as a legend and are still one. Every episode just as good as the last. I do often find myself saying "ahaaa, so that's how it works!" Pure , unadulterated logic, love it !!!!

[@acefully4703]

He’s ELITE

[@vicvic2081]

It's because he is excellent at making autistic men understand basic reality

[@ma2000]

My thoughts exactly! Just when I thought I knew everything about this topic, he shines new light on it! Amazing 💡

[@ajseb]

The best channel on KZbin in my opinion

[@forwardPluS.]

A man's Future will always matter to a woman. A woman's Past will always matter to a man. IT IS WHAT IT IS!

[@tigerazan7780]

Red pill: Go fuck as many women as you want. Same red pill: Marry only virgin women.

[@beth9678]

Agreed … the man’s ego makes it so when it shouldn’t matter and yet often their body count can be higher with no focus on that number … possibly a primal double standard

[@spearfish]

This sort of touches on the retroactive jealousy I have towards every girl I've dated. Nothing makes you feel more like a simp than putting in years of effort for something another guy got just for buying her a drink.

[@LARA-sg4bt]

Then you should have also had a hoe phase

[@Yay-hovah]

A drink? I once wore this young lady out for weeks and 20 phucks later she asked me if I could buy her a soda. I only bought her a soda. Let that sink in.

[@TheAnalyst-ib9rr]

@Yay-hovah maturity is when you realize you are just as disgusting as that young women. Imbibe traditional values and reject degeneracy

[@thusspokezarathustra1847]

I come from a small Himalayan countryside in India. Here this is how it goes: No Seal No Deal! Marriages here are very successful. No gender war. But Western degeneracy is creeping in.

[@Remember-Death]

If you have access to the internet, Western degeneracy is right around the corner.

[@evgeniptolemy5570]

Do everything you can to resist the cancer of "Modern Emotional Western Thinking" (or MEWT). It's a nightmare here and it's ruining society.

[@nerychristian]

How do you confirm the seal?

[@thusspokezarathustra1847]

@@nerychristian The seal can't be confirmed as I have heard from experts in the area. But the point isn't the physical seal but the idea. Else anyone can say I lost it through cycling. The idea that promiscuity leads to ruin. For both men & women.

[@nerychristian]

@@thusspokezarathustra1847 I agree. Once women lose their virginity, they are no longer the same. They lose their innocence and purity and softness. When women are virgins and they experience sex with a man, it's as if they are willing to do anything for the man

[@Chaos-lb9hi]

If a woman’s number of previous partners (body count) didn’t matter. Then why do women get defensive when asked

[@mariepetterson7281]

Because we know the information can be used against us. In the form of shaming, etc.

[@Yomel123]

Cause men shame. But women should say incredibly high numbers to weed out insecure men who see women as objects

[@martinskoog1777]

Even then why would it matter? Because it matters?@@mariepetterson7281

[@darbyohara]

Bingo. They know it matters. It’s basic human evolution

[@nongrada6004]

@@mariepetterson7281wich is good shaming should come back. Les bastard children running around and healthier relationships.

[@georgemubanga1878]

Doctor Orion, we don't want to know her body count because we've decided to commit, we want to know her body count to see if its a good idea to commit. In the same way we would want to know the past performance of a company to know if its a good idea to invest in that company.

[@cosmictreason2242]

He's right that you've already decided on some level that you want her, motivating the questions. It's not that you're committed though

[@GreatRetro]

exactly!

[@doates625]

I agree. To me, sexual purity is a prerequisite for emotional investment. Google "Counterintuitive Trends in the Link Between Premarital Sex and Marital Stability" and the 5-year divorce rates based on number of premarital sexual partners is approximately 0: 5% 1: 20% 2: 30% 3: 35% 4+: About the same Everyone has different levels of risk tolerance, but as a happily single man who wants to one day build a strong family, even a 20% divorce rate is too risky for me. The numbers are in. Virginity wins. But nobody wants to hear that.

[@detroitvcw]

Truth of the matter is that you will never know the exact number, and depending on how each count transpired, will determine an approximation of damage it has done to her psyche. I get why you want to know the number, but thats next to impossible. Women inherently know that revealing the number of guys she's slept with will put her chances of getting long term security at risk, so you have to take an associative approach in finding out if its high or not. Sometimes its not high, but the associated, undesired ramifications are there - Cant pair bond, loss of malleability, personality disorder, imprinted by another man, lack of femininity, etc...I've met women who was imprinted by one guy, and had 2 partners throughout her life, and was just as bad as the women with 20+. Sometimes the situation with one guy is so bad that she gets imprinted with all the bs he bestowed upon her...usually its a situation that lasted 5-17 years, and shes imprinted by that man. All that to say that the 1 toxic situation a woman may have with 1 guy can be just as bad as the woman with the casual 20, depending on the nature of the situation(s). Considering inter-sexual dynamics, women are not pscologically built to be promiscous, and in turn establish a successful long-term relationship with a guy. The outcome of having sex with many or just 1 in some cases as I explained, does not coincide with what a man desires in a woman....1,2,3 can be too many. The aftermath of such actions will repulse a man naturally, so whether you know her body count or not, the breakup is inevitable. You just want position/verse yourself in learning the associative signs so that you find out implicitly if shes a good/bad bet.

[@GreatRetro]

@@detroitvcw youäll never know if you never ask/investigate!

[@VictorJoseMartinez]

100% nailed it. The jealousy is rooted in a feelimg of being ripped off...investing more for less

[@inorbit8666]

It was that girl that was hooked upon one of my male friends. She wanted him badly but he didn't want anything more serious with her than conventional hookups, because she had a (well known in our circle) very high body count... She skillfully pressed him for a serious commitment and when he told her she has a high body count she said that that's a regretful past, she is not that girl anymore, she has regretted it and only future matters. He responded that "if you really believe that, then I'm relieved and we can work a relation, because in my part, I was a no-touch-pedophile for 10 years but I have regreted it aswell and I'm not that man anymore - but please don't tell anyone". The next morning she had blocked him from all social... LOL... Mind you, this friend had days earlier informed us that he'll tell her this lie to show her that past matters - and guess what... after she blocked him she informed everyone in our circle that "this guy is a pedo"... LOL

[@Rkenichi]

It’s actually absurd to read shit like this now that I’ve left the disaster that is the US

[@LARA-sg4bt]

Honestly, good on the girl, your friend sounds like a douche

[@Yay-hovah]

😂😂😂 That was brilliant.

[@Vaibhav-jn8os]

Brilliant!

[@battlepug3122]

Body count matters because statistically the more sexual partners you have the more likely you are to be unfaithful. Simple. No need to overcomplicate it.

[@rob21]

THIS. While there may be some truth to the new guy not being the best she's ever had (1 of 20 in his example), that's not the primary issue. She's obviously shopping around looking for someone better, so even if that's you, there could always be someone better.

[@texasfirst3991]

​@@rob21Agreed. Once a woman believes that she can upgrade sex partners, there's really no limiting principle. You weren't her first, so you won't be her last. She will eventually get old/ugly and try to settle, but that's only after lighting the world on fire. And she didn't even stop out of remorse. These kinds of women would do this until the day they die if they could. So avoid them like the plague, and point them out if you can as a service to your fellow man.

[@53Strat]

So many reasons that with especially with women that body count should matter. I have to be honest, I have a fair share of sexual experiences, ranging in the 35. Its indeed a proxy for underlying issues. The last women I dated with a high body count was horrible in bed besides having a great body and me simply fucking her like a hooker. THen I had women with a low body count who were so attracted to me they gave me the best sex. I will always try to prey for body count when I can, it tells me all I need to know and I want to avoid STD"s from now on lol.

[@encouraginglyauthentic43]

Okay when you get undeniable proof that she has cheated on you, then break up with her.

[@DemonsCrest1]

yep. she slept with someone else before. she is more likely to do it again. it is the same reason normal people are cautious of murders. sure they might be a born again christian murderer or whatever. but if they have murdered once, they have proven a capacity for it, and are more likely to do it again. why sleep in the bed with a person with a "history" when you can instead pick someone who is younger and does not have that "history".?

[@niallcurran7894]

Brilliant talk. Currently dating a woman and we didn't sleep together out of the gate. I wasn't too eager initially and in fact this made her more eager the next time we met. Implementing some restraint on my part actually made her persue me more. I know there's multiple psychological things at play, but it has shown me that by not placing too much relevance on the act, actually improves it.

[@OfficialDarkSoulMusic]

Yep make her chase you instead of you chasing her. Women are smart, they know what men want. Being nonchalant about it may make a guy more attractive to a girl. Even if you're dying inside to get laid, don't show it.

[@nelsonzambrano5788]

She also was probably wondering who else was she competing with...

[@JesseC620]

This has been my experience as well... If she can't get a clear read on how you feel about her or your attraction level on the first meeting or first date, and she is used to guys being too obvious in their interest for her from the get go, she is more likely to move things forward and initiate physical interactions with you quicker... Hence why all of the jaded bad boys do so well in getting most women obsessed with them so quickly...he has had so much experience that she is nothing special to him, so he doesn't even need to fake low interest to get her going...she truly is just another potential notch count to him... The only possible women that will be the exception to this who won't throw themselves at him are those that were raised by honorable, strong fathers, who set a good example for her, and if she has a higher than average amount of self control... But rest assured, this type of woman will still be secretly lusting after the bad boy, she will just be less likely to act on this impulse...

[@valdius85]

Later on in the relationship it is the same. Needing in general and wanting from her are different things. Sometimes it simply makes more sense to release the pressure by yourself. Obviously it’s a complicated subject. Being with a woman who values intimacy is important.

[@Jay-bu6cd]

I’m in my 50s never married and I’ve taken this slow approach over the decades, not with intention to manipulate, but just because I like to take things slow. It has had the effect of “making me different“ than other men who are so aggressive. Because I’m not aggressive sexually women tend to want to get with me really quickly and want to stay with me. I’m pretty vanilla with my sex but women love it with me because of the emotional connection they feel with me in bed.

[@danielj3010]

I heard the "toxic ex" story from a recent encounter, makes me smile every time to remind me - this is not long term.

[@fronttowardenemy7972]

In modern society, being the toxic ex is a badge of honor. It means you left her and not the other way around!

[@tdaye6978]

@@fronttowardenemy7972 And it means she'll be back, no matter what

[@JiMMY-my1ds]

One of the biggest red flags, but not spoken about much is the ‘my ex was toxic’ fable.

[@L6FT]

Yes exactly. Guys in general suffer more from being dumped than women do. Guy's may take back a weaked woman, women seldom take back a weaked man.

[@suvendroseal1724]

That was some head-spinning truth at the end for why having a low body is actually good.

[@ep7112]

I really like your content, typically spot on. On this topic you’re just dead wrong. Men care because it makes them physically repulsed. We want to be the first. I know that might not be realistic in today’s society, but it doesn’t change a thing with regard to how men feel.

[@ripl0x]

With the first woman/scenario, yes I would still feel apprehension and disgust. And yes, those other men, if any of them are around or still in contact with her, are potential backup plans in case our relationship goes south. In fact, I would be downright suspicious with that change in behavior. 15 dudes she tried to take seriously and none of them worked out? Sounds like she has a problem picking men or an issue with herself that causes breakups to happen. Agreed on the second scenario, though. Her view of herself and her SMV is really skewed from that one relationship.

[@faulrevere8938]

He did preface by admitting it was an extreme (and therefore unlikely) example, but your points are well taken.

[@ballen0360]

I agree with you completely

[@evanragland4930]

No kidding. Neither of those women sounded like ltr material. The first woman had been with 15 men and was never satisfied!!! What do you think the chances are you're going to be the guy that does satisfy her? The second woman will always be hung up on her ex. Either way neither one is worth settling down with and risking everything you've built.

[@alex-p]

You are 100% correct... but let's not forget that Dr.Orion is a smart dude but he's still a timid nerdy beta at heart and his perspective will be always skewed by his own nature.

[@fiveleavesleft6521]

And with social media the chances that she's not still in touch with her previous "best" are pretty much zero. I've been that guy a few times- if they're bored or angry in their LTR or marriage, they always find a way to get back in touch.

[@StrongBodymindandspirit]

Problem is she could be lying about breaking the rules for you 😂

[@danielj3010]

yup - just bang good and succeed solo

[@detroitvcw]

...which, more than likely she is. There's universal truths when it comes to women that is relative to sex. The right circumstances and alignment with her fanciful pornography - beauty and the beast, tarzan, tall , whatever the depiction of male & scenario she fantacizes about, best beleive she will do any everything she fantacizes about with that guy..plus whatever he ask/wants her to do. If she says she doesnt do it...BS. Depending on the circumstance(s), there's a handful of reasons why she would say it to a particular man in that given time, but 9/10 she will and has for the "right" guy.

[@justanothernick3984]

That's why you need to get to know a person and learn to trust them. Trust is tricky business. My fiance dated a hockey pro before me and sure, I questioned her intentions with me. But after 4 years, she keeps lending me her trust and loyalty. And as long as we both do that, we can enjoy each others company. If she finds someone better than me, sucks to be me but I need to let her move on.

[@StrongBodymindandspirit]

@@justanothernick3984 so what? You just never get married because she might “find someone better than me”? That’s fucked up because I guarantee she wants to be a married woman. And if you don’t act on it, she will leave you

[@justanothernick3984]

@@StrongBodymindandspirit I've been married and I thought never again but I might be daft enough to do it again. 😁 One of my priorities in life is a good relationship and for that, I am paying a lot, trust me on that. You need to find your own priorities and live off of those. That might be to shaft as many as possible or dedicate yourself to science or whatever but once you find those priorities, if you don't go with them, you might regret it.

[@FeelnLikeIDoEveryDay]

I’m a hop skip and a jump away from deleting KZbin, forsaking the internet and going full monk mode 🙏 freedom here I come 😎

[@evgeniptolemy5570]

Can't blame you.

[@abcdefghi9]

Increasingly I've been thing the same thing.

[@boopy12g]

A constant thought

[@robertstein3770]

Amen

[@xHeeroYux]

Read books and hit the gym brother 💪

[@dr.python]

My GF (ex) had 50 body count, the count didn’t matter as much as finding out the hard way that _”past actions dictate future patterns.”_ After a certain number the body count (and frequency/method/pattern) does matter, no matter how well you can deal with their past.

[@vink1547]

Any body count she gives you is probably a lie. She’s not yours, it’s just your turn

[@outsideworld76]

Word.

[@avakko]

@@vink1547 Facts

[@TheOneAndOnlyOne-1]

This is it

[@kellygreenii]

It’s also about the assurance of paternity. If a woman is more likely to cheat, any child she has is less likely to actually be yours. The higher the body count the less likely she’s able to form stable LTRs…and she’s a bad investment as far as any sort of committed relationship.

[@dizzy4u]

I know someone who lost her virginity to her boyfriend of many years and still cheated.. this is a myth. People who have little sexual experience with multiple persons are always feeling like there’s possibly better out there. Someone with experience knows that what they have is great.

[@Dewane1511]

@@dizzy4u 😂😂

[@busybecomingmyself]

​@@Dewane1511the emojis are your way of telling everyone you aren't capable of a coherent counterargument

[@mbg9650]

Paternity test should be mandatory.

[@patrickrada2923]

@kellygreenii You're right, but Dr. Taraban's point is, as I understand it, that the body count is a symptom and not the cause.

[@HD46409]

If she isn't breaking rules for you and chasing you then eject. She isn't really that interested in anything except your resources. Also, my wealthy brothers, hide your damn money. If you don't you will get a lot of these transactional women.

[@valdius85]

That’s what I see in many of my friends as well. They spend money during initial dates and then complain. I spent $3 on my wife during first date, $15 on the second and she paid for the third.

[@zidoumillion8949]

Transactional women are the most honest women. At least you know it's Pay for Play. It be the Free women that be costing the most. I'll take a £200 for 2h session all day everyday than a divorce, alimony, child support, or false allegation.

[@leojanuszewski1019]

OUTSTANDING advice.

[@PaperStCo]

Guys, you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t inquire. The best bet is to stop putting relationships with women before yourself and your circle of friends in nearly every instance.

[@AblackGenie]

I was just feeling so many negative emotions, you made me realized I derailed off the path. Reading this gave me a sense of relief and clarity. Thank you brother 💪🏽

[@PaperStCo]

@@AblackGenie look man, women will lie for whatever narrative benefits them the most. If you are paying all the bills, then they’ve only slept with you and one other guy. If you’re a hookup, then they won’t be shy.

[@balasaravanan500]

Your wisdom knows no bounds sir. This was what I've been thinking on lately, you've provided very detailed answer. Thank you very much as always.

[@Ggi0900]

I've dated people with high bodycounts before and they all turned out to be addicted to hookup culture and unable to ignore the urge to return to the clubs. People like that can't be anyone's life partner until they work through their issues on their own. I don't want to go through my entire love life constantly at risk of STDs or being a victim of paternity fraud so these days I hedge my bets.

[@nichepainting4117]

This is not always true, though I agree in general. I was, I guess still am, a high body count guy. At some point around 30 I just needed something more and realized ‘hook-up’s’ weren’t giving it to me. So I just changed. I’ve had over 50 partners but only 1 in the last 30 years. Just saying people can reign it all in and commit if they’re self aware enough

[@Ggi0900]

@nichepainting4117 Yup. Not disgreeing that it's possible to change but there's a reason 93% of marriages where one or both partners have a 50+ bodycount fail. Betting you future on a "former" sex addict is like putting your life savings on the slowest horse to win the Grand national. You're betting on the underdog and it's not likely to work but on the off-chance that it does work you'll be very happy with the outcome.

[@lawsonhannah]

I’ve noticed that the more sexual partners a woman has, the more masculine she is. Probably has something to do with that hunter/conquerer personality trait. To be fair, I’ve met plenty of masculine women that weren’t promiscuous, but I’ve never met a promiscuous woman that wasn’t masculine.

[@VaronPlateando]

@lawsonhannah ... no, I wouldn't think so. she won't become loyal, sincere, rational, honorable or coherent following afore. actually, she'll be more fickle, nagging, obnoxious in other sense, and unreliable on following up on her said past (all fully feminine traits, incl. the emotionalism included, most probably).

[@TV-oc4ml]

What a stupid comment

[@bedroo222222]

They tend to be very extroverted .

[@lawsonhannah]

@@bedroo222222 Agreed….They like the “hunt”, just like a guy.

[@umbrascitor2079]

Higher testosterone correlates with higher sex drive in both men and women. Be careful what you wish for when you ask for women to be ultra feminine. You might wind up dealing with a dead bedroom problem instead.

[@gregprince5283]

I would add one additional caveat that could be a game changer in what she chooses to do and not to do. It's not uncommon for people who live recklessly and throw caution to the wind to put themselves in a position that becomes unfavorable to them. Desperate people do Desperate things. A woman just off a divorce from my experience ends up being the wildest she's ever been. That new sense of freedom( similar to spring break) as well as a desire for revenge against her ex causes her to have an attitude of wanting to do more for the next guy. Also, if she's tied down with kids, she may not have confidence in her options and will once again likely do whatever it takes since her options are limited. Circumstances and life experiences can change the outcome of what might not have occurred in a different scenario.

[@feloniousmonk3049]

A female friend that goes through a breakup is more likely to have vengeance sex immediately after the breakup. It's usually pretty wild and exploratory, at that time.

[@TheBayzent]

@breathe3146 You could have beat a lot of other guys or the other guys were using her as a FWB situation, since they didn't committ.

[@ronj9448]

Good points. In my early 30s I would clean up on newly divorced women with two kids under 8. They feel exhausted and trapped and it was easy pickings. Had to stop because I was looking for more. (Prob a dumb move)

[@fffff2521]

@breathe3146 yucky.

[@kevinkeeran7035]

I wouldn't discount just 'good old fashioned disgust' vs. the construct you're describing. Sometimes a used toothbrush is just a used toothbrush, and an increase in mouths, whether they were lesser mouths or greater....is just gross, because A touches B, and B touches me.

[@audrydayes]

I hope this also applies to men...

[@seanfobbs7575]

@@audrydayesI hope you shut the hell up

[@fallencrusader2975]

I don't care about the gender wars baloney, high body count is disgusting and spiritually damaging regardless if your a man or a woman. However truth be told, evolutionarily speaking, women usually care less about body count for men and sometimes find men with higher body counts more attractive.

[@alejandrodelgado5829]

​@@audrydayesnot the same, man gives and woman take.

[@ChrisM-dx8up]

@@audrydayes It's only a double standard because most women don't care. MOST men would gladly want women to care about body count. That'd make it easier to find someone that matches theirs. Virgins to virgins, 30 body counts to 30 body counts.

[@crimson6172]

Men who are looking for short term flings doesn't care or even prefer women with high body count. Men who are looking for long term committed relationships do care about the woman's body count. Perfectly said. 👌

[@TheBayzent]

It is a matter of investment. If I just want to get ky rocks off I'm getting whatever I can get, if I want a wife to share my life with, it's going to be different.

[@EgalitarianWoman]

This is the advice I give to any younger women and men. If you want a wife, know and judge her past...it will be your future. If you want a husband, know and judge his past...it will be your future. Do not be fooled by the pretty lies and dismissals people of both sexes give. Leopards don't change their spots.

[@ttamcc.4674]

Say that again!!

[@toogsintheteeth]

Everything you have said seems to align with what I have experienced. I've been in dating situations in the past where I am expected to wait, and once I achieved a higher status I found that being made to wait was quite rare. I also realized that a really good bed game led to far more interest from the woman, in some instances leading to clingy behavior from her that I have a difficult time escaping from. It's really true that the less I care, the more she's intrigued.

[@delocon]

If you can melt her body, it's almost like brainwashing her.

[@marcusmcgraw3519]

That’s why I make the women wait instead. It always benefits you when you keep them at arm’s length and force them to act on their interest that they’ve shown and not the other way around

[@delocon]

@@marcusmcgraw3519 That's a fantastic point. I do something similar, in the first hour of a date I always tell women: "Just so you know I'm not taking you home tonight, no matter how this date goes. If I want to have the kind of sex I enjoy with you, I need to know you a little, and know I can trust you."

[@bryanutility9609]

@@marcusmcgraw3519also waiting I have dodged a few bullets with crazy women. After a couple weeks of getting to know them I’m glad I never slept with them. BPD etc…

[@Mr.SushiFriedRice]

With my Ex, she said I was her 5th (which was concerning but I still went with it). However, the issue came when I learned that after her four year long relationship (which she was devastated after the break up), she engaged got into one hook up and then another straight after. Then, she met me a month or so later. I learned this all 8 months into the relationship. It made me lose all my pride and respect for her. The worse thing that happened is that I found out about someone she initially had a FWB with (immediately after her 4 year break up) and that I found out because I ran into the guy at an event. From that moment, I could no longer see her as a future wife, the future mother of my children. I could no longer be proud to have her by my side. So now, I am vigilant and cautious when dating as I am vetting so something like this can be avoided. P.S. I was 23 and she was 25, so the age difference was a bit of a disadvantage

[@SHANONisRegenerate]

What she did is pretty normal man. Its called the rebound. Dont judge her too harshly because lots of people go looking for a rebound hookup. Maybe Orion knows why

[@53Strat]

@@SHANONisRegenerate Lmao, you have zero experience with women

[@SHANONisRegenerate]

@@53Strat if you say so haha

[@Mr.SushiFriedRice]

@@SHANONisRegenerate For sure, the rebound. She mentioned she just wanted to feel desired again. However, that demonstrated to me how fragile she is. Other factors leading to the break up were that she never really had her father in her life (basically nonexistent). And the relationship was difficult because she was constantly afraid I would leave and she always wanted Attention. So much so that when we got in a bad argument and didn’t talk for 2 days, she called her Ex of Four years (this happened 4 months into the relationship however I found out later down the line at 8 months). She said the call to the Ex was basically I was not answering her phone calls and she needed someone to talk to. And she said she called her ex to ask if she is really that bad to have as a girlfriend. At least that is what she said, but from a moment like, I connected the dots with her daddy issues and how unstable she was in her self worth and emotionally. So that’s another lesson learned, vet for woman with strong father figure and whose parents are still together.

[@Mr.SushiFriedRice]

Forgot to mention but the issue with the Rebound is what Dr. Taraban said of how it’s an “unfavorable economic exchange” that made me feel that she is not as attracted to me as her previous experiences.

[@doates625]

Your nuanced take fits with my observations exactly, which is why I will only marry a virgin, and, so as to avoid being a hypocrite, will not have sex until marriage.

[@shogunkodogun]

bro you shouldn’t abide by virtues in expectations of reward. You should do them because they are right.

[@AblackGenie]

@@shogunkodogunwell said.

[@Saint_Darius]

he got it right the first time@@shogunkodogun

[@mudblood9699]

I understand the logic in preferring a virgin bride, but that's just statistically very unlikely in the west, especially if you're too old to pursue 18 and 19 year olds. Furthermore, men and women are effected to different degrees, and in some regards, different ways, by increased numbers of sex partners, so it's not hypocritical to prefer a virgin woman as a non-virgin man; the standards are different. Also, like Orion said in the video, the better you fuck a woman, the stronger her attraction, respect, and loyalty to you will be, so experience, up to a point, helps in that regard.

[@ryanrogers8211]

@@shogunkodogunlet’s take it a step further, why are the virtues of sexual purity right?

[@HoiPolloi23]

from what i've seen and experienced, the more partners a woman has had, the more emotional damage and baggage she carries.

[@thesetruths1404]

This is absolutely accurate.

[@DS-os4hr]

I high body count indicates lack of self control. You won't tolerate that once you're in a relationship.

[@GamingDemiurge]

Your thesis is not supported by data. A recent study showed that there is a dramatic difference between infidel and faithful wives body count. Infidel woman had on average an order of magnitude more sexual partners than the faithful ones. It is not a matter of discussion, is fact. As a man you don't want a high body count wife, period.

[@GamingDemiurge]

BTW in your example I would discard both woman. The first one because 15 bodies. In the second one because alpha widow plus high usage. Both of them are terrible options for lifetime partners and are disgusting in their own way.

[@lamentate07]

Yeah. Claiming it's just jealousy is a cop out.

[@l.b.2392]

​@@lamentate07noo it's just insecurity, real masculine men don't care about a woman's body count! Hahaha just kidding

[@zombieboy937]

Cite your sources, bud.

[@the_immigrant__]

I needed this video today, like I extremely needed it - man you are a hero, I have mentioned you in my gratitude journal so many times, I hope to one day be able to shake your hand

[@donfabian1542]

Very interesting video, thanks a lot for sharing your insights on this, Dr. Taraban. One additional thing to consider when dealing with women with a high body count is the much higher risk of getting an STD from them. So, always take care and protect yourselves very well, gentlemen!

[@jrd3675]

My ex said her body count was 150 💀 And that's why she's an ex now.

[@RhoadsLocke]

High body count = Higher chance of STDs. Don't think he mentioned this...

[@AristoCat-h6h]

Womens sexual statisfaction is a guage of the relationship, not necessaily sexual prowress. Yes, it helps to be a stud. But, D1 college chad gets cheated on too when she says "I been unhappy for a long time and Bob from accounting just hears me"

[@EddyG0rdo]

This should be pinned. Tom Brady got dumped…

[@fiat_ow7876]

Yes. Luckily, a woman’s level of arousal is not all physical. Thank god for this, because 99% of men would be fucked if it was the only factor.

[@blairdurward4324]

Very underrated comment.

[@Yay-hovah]

@@EddyG0rdo 😂😂😂 How do you know he didn’t suck in bed?

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

8:18 I think the attachment style reason given here is the single best explanation as to why a women with a low body count represents a better mate choice. Its great to hear Dr Taraban going into attachment styles. I do agree that a powerful climax is important but, for me, secure attachment style is fundamental for LTRs.

[@kirdref9431]

Attachment style theory is pure nonsense.

[@Nickel_Coin]

@@kirdref9431 "The thing that holds me accountable for my psychopathic insecure behavior is pure nonsense" thus implies experts in psychology and mentally healthy women are wrong. Your pathology and the way you phrased your comment gave you away.

[@Nickel_Coin]

Exactly. Women without attachment style problems are 99.99% of the time very easy to tell apart from the ones that try to live ideologically and morally inconsistent lives where they habitually pretend they aren't aware of what they're doing. Many will even try to attack ideas and people that hold them accountable for their actions with aspersions and or try to shame people out of having standards or simply using their brain when evaluating another human being as a person (and they know exactly what they're doing). And if someone genuinely lacks the awareness to see their hypocrisy in their behavior like that they are a massive liability anyway. The kinds of men the bad women want are the kinds of men that are going to be the most likely to see through their bs.

[@ladybug3380]

Emotional attachment is needed for her to be loyal. Sexual attachment isn’t needed for her to be loyal.

[@AnkyPank]

@@kirdref9431 , Actually, it's one of the best-researched areas of psychology

[@changingflavors2839]

Back when i was looking for a person for a long term relationship, body count was one indicator as to her ability of willpower/impulse control. (Similar to the marshmallow test they did on children) I also was looking for someone with at least some Christian values in regards to marriage, in that we are serious when we take our vows and be committed to the family we make. I've been married for twenty years and still very much happy. However, I understand that was twenty years ago. I have three boys so I look at the prospects out there for them to pick from and it isn't looking too good. My wife and I are doing our best to teach them, which is all we can do.

[@Jayar_]

Out of curiosity, how has the body count impacted your marriage? Reason I ask is because I also have Christian values and most of the girls I have dated that even had a relatively small count seemed to have been really emotionally messed up by it.

[@vicvic2081]

Just don't teach your boys lies. They will suffer tremendously

[@wicket_gate]

@@Jayar_ Yikes, I used to be a Christian but I just left man. I do believe that the christian values are good for a succesful marriage. I was very devoted and even chose to remain a virgin until marriage. Still a virgin at 26 years old. I deconverted when I was 24 after I noticed I was living a fairytale. Nearly all the girls I dated had the "I used to be lost" type of story. I was very stoic and non-judgemental with them. They would open up and it really made me question what the point of marriage was. I am still deconverting but I stopped believing that BS. 95% plus people in church have sex before marriage but yet still continue preaching about abstinence. It's all appearances after all...now we are seeing how the culture is being destroyed

[@pescatoralpursuit1726]

​@@wicket_gate The culture is not being destroyed by the Church or the hypocrites in the Church; in fact, quite the opposite. So people unwilling or unable to live up to Christ's standards yet still believe in them, has caused you to deconstruct your Faith? Did you find hypocrisy in Christ?

[@wicket_gate]

@@pescatoralpursuit1726well, say what you you believe but the church is no different than the "culture." By the way, I am a pastor's kid and was born, raised in the"church." My dad is sound preacher and principled man. My parents marriage is great. I have a very strong background if you will. Divorces in the evangelical community are even higher than those in the culture.. Keep living in your fairytale land but I prefer living in reality.

[@Draxis32]

Interesting how the psychologists of today see relationships are purely transactional. Like everything must be weighted and have it's value appraised. In Orion's vision a relationship it's like a share or a bond. There is no affection, connection, nothing. Pure market forces inside a stock exchange. I believe this is a chronic effect of social media on people. Every second of one's life is being drained towards their alter ego, now virtually trapped inside instagram, facebook, twitter etc. In sum, love has become a commodity. Given that, like Salt, Gold, Wood, Slaves in the past it is only a matter of time before there'll be wars because of love.

[@alsimon4722]

I was watching a DJ Vlad and TK Kirkland interview, and the topic of Brittany Renner came up. Both said, they'd rather not know what a woman's body count is. Vlad commented that he'd rather have a clean STD test and a good moral character. Seeing how I think most women would lie about their body count anyway, I'm inclined to agree.

[@LeslieOpolka]

As a Woman who has been married for 25 years… I would agree with this. There is something to be said about quality over quantity.

[@TheBayzent]

I don't think anybody would find strange that women agree with this. Afterall it is just saying that your lack of self restraint is totally OK.

[@croissants1280]

He's over-complicating it. If she sleeps around, she's lower quality. End of.

[@Arkinight]

Simple as

[@enrico.was.here007]

You're wrong. He is explaining the analogy. But the latter statement you made is 100% true.

[@highlanderknight]

That is like saying there is only black and white and no shades of grey.

[@phantomplastics6582]

Studies show a strong relationship between number of female partners and relationship success / happiness.

[@patrikback739]

There was a big study in Sweden that showed a fairly strong correlation between high body count and poor selfconfidance in women. Same study showed the opposite for men.

[@mudblood9699]

What are the names of those studies, and at what number of sexual partners were men's chances at relationship happiness substantially negatively effected? I know men can have dozens of sex partners without substantially inhibiting our pair bonding capacity. I have a friend who claims to have slept with more than 200 women. I'm skeptical it's really that high, but I believe it's over 100. He's been in a quasi-committed (one-sided) relationship for eight or nine years.

[@darbyohara]

@@mudblood9699the studies did not show any statistically significant differences in a man’s prior sexual partner count and his happiness in a relationship. The issue is a woman thing. Men and women are different

[@darbyohara]

It’s one of the 2 empirical data points that demonstrates marriage/relationship success and happiness. The other is income.

[@si-jd9oq]

@@darbyohara Most studies I've read do show significant differences in a man’s prior sexual partner count and his happiness in a relationship. They were just lower than a woman's. For example, a man with a body count of 5 may be 3x more likely to cheat. A woman with a body count of 5 may be 8x more likely to cheat, when both are compared to virgins.

[@MrEllipsis423]

I think this is the moment where I just give up and be a monk

[@georgeradulescu7175]

Spot on. My wife is always at her most affectionate, loving, and happy after great sex. It's literally like giving the relationship a video game power up. Who knew that something so fun can also be so beneficial? In fact, I would say that relationships at their core are not difficult if you do what is pleasurable and what gives you happiness. It's only when you give in to negative emotions (envy, greed, doubt, spite) that things go downhill.

[@winkA1]

It’s so true. If it’s gone a week without sex I start questioning everything else about the relationship “does he still love me etc” it’s crazy and luckily I’m mature enough to notice the crazy shit my brain is pulling on me… but it still happens. If we’re having sex regularly I’ll move mountains for my man without a second thought (and do his laundry with a smile on my face) 😂 We women are a lot simpler than we like to think we are 😅

[@MA-gu2up]

But is it the sex itself? Maybe it is the fact that you want to have sex and she sees that you still desire her a lot I don't think it is about the act itself for women, but rather it is about being sure that her man still finds her attractive or sexy and he is pationate about her

[@MA-gu2up]

​@@winkA1 Your point is like my above comment For women, it is more about her man desiring her than it is about the act itself If her man didn't initiate sex for a long time, she starts thinking whether he is still attracted to her, or whether he is just very exhausted or something like that What do you think?

[@mudblood9699]

Things go downhill inevitably if you are not your woman's best lover. This really should be taught in sex ed.

[@fiat_ow7876]

@@mudblood9699yeah, and it’s hard to do this when the average woman has been ran through, and probably once with a guy that knows his shit and is huge. I stay away from dating because of this. I’m not winning that battle.

[@MDUnleashed]

Finally! An OBJECTIVE analysis of the body count topic. Some people may agree or disagree with certain parts, but we can at least all admit it was objective.

[@JayJay-oi5cz]

One of your best episodes! It brings a few lose ends together

[@PassportBrosBusinessClass]

In the old day, these women could lie about their body counts, and you’d be oblivious to it. Thanks to the Internet, her past is going to catch up with you and you’re going to find out about it.

[@Vision_Voyagers]

Here's how my people do it. Marry young, (male 21-22, female 19-20) and vow to held eachother in every situation (I mean every situation) Make your partner and relationship better instead of finding a better relationship. How's that? I know you wanna be financially independent, amd conquer the world, do it with some instead of doing it all alone. and remember who stayed with you in your struggle only they are entitled to have a part in your success.

[@eric_linden]

Body count is a big thing, but it isn’t the only thing. It is one of many factors to take into account.

[@Unamedblue3]

Depends.

[@frankv7068]

Virgins are the best‼️ a wedding dress is white to represent purity. Most old, conservative, societal customs are perfect when you follow the rules, don’t break em and don’t question them, there’s a reason why my parents are celebrating their 50 years of happy marriage and modern western society has a 56% divorce rate. I rather listen to someone with living proof that works than the latter.

[@piotrmarcisz9309]

Adequacy of content you sharing is incredible

[@elainer8288]

I think even better than low body count is a woman with low body count for a specific reason. This reason being because the woman has ever only slept with someone in a long term relationship, and associates physical intimacy with feelings and connection. This way, you decrease your chances of being cheated on to almost zero because this kind of person doesn't even want to cheat. But, on the other hand, this kind of woman won't tolerate if you ever cheat. So I guess a man needs to think if he is able to do the same of what he is looking for.

[@johnr5847]

You've proven that a high number of partners is a red flag. Didn't expect that.

[@LongLivDaKing]

Re confirnming what in our subconscious we really already know... As women have become more sexually liberated, and mentally influenced by media.. there really is no solid reason to dead aim focus on ( provision, and being comforting emotionally) Sexual experience and excitement outranks those traits..

[@hotlucky5622]

Yup, depends on the culture, the age of the girl and her priorities/situation too. Material comfort & status on one side, vs. Mental, emotional and sexual stimulation on the other. The ratio of one to the other varies on a case by case basis.

[@varvarvarvarvarvar]

It's almost as if powerful men liberated women so that they could have sex with more women without compensating them as much.

[@alexanderv.b.170]

Bravo Doctor. This is one of your best videos so far. As a man, for a long time I was convinced that women didn't really care a fig about sex and used it almost exclusively for bargaining. You have at last convinced me that sex is, in fact, not only more important to women (and by far) than to men, but also that they are constantly thinking about it. Women are even more addicted to it than men are. And bless them for it. P.S. The microhone peaked quite a bit this episode and your otherwise beautiful voice became a little grating on the ears.

[@pogolas]

Thai’s not my experience at all. In most (by far) married couples I know, it is the man who is asking for sex and the wife is finding excuses. They don’t need sex. They enjoy it, but it is not important to them, and all other things have to be perfect, in order for them to feel the drive.

[@MA-gu2up]

What?? Are you serious?! I don't think he made a video saying women are thinking about sex more That is very opposed to research and the experience of people Men are almost the only ones who pay for sex, also the husband wanting sex and the wife refusing is a well-known meme(meaning it is relatable), and men are theones who initiate almost all sexual activity. How would one even reach such a conclusion?! It is very detached from reality

[@malakatan3235]

​@@pogolassomething wrong with your woman😅, I am not saying women have sex drive as high as men, but...

[@elainer8288]

​@@pogolas True.

[@elainer8288]

He didn't mean any of this. He meant women are less likely to cheat if they are happy in the physical aspect of the relationship, while for men no matter how happy he is physically in the relationship, it doesn't change the likelihood of them cheating.

[@robertfindley921]

Sure, it's all relative. But the first woman in your hypothetical sounds like a major liar. I think the concerns of high body count are very legitimate. And as they say, women will tell on themselves eventually. Maybe not the number, but in some form.

[@merlcycle8058]

Absolutely brilliant episode! The narrator of this knows of what he speaks. Were we to ask the women from his past-women to whom he did just as he advises in this episode-I’m certain they pine for him. They’ve had no one like him. It’s magical what happens to good women when a man does what he’s told to do in this video.

[@Feindish_Emperor]

I love this channel because you're always coming in with the hard truths. I make it a policy of mine to never take the truth personally so, I learn a lot here and I'm able to implement it... Making me better at life.

[@MrMcWitt]

You’re a legend. Keep sharing the wisdom and waking men up

[@malekkushimuzik3580]

The "UNFAIR ECONOMIC EXCHANGE" is THE POINT ☝🏿

[@pranshujagtap]

Body count matters only to an extent..even a woman with only 1 body count can not be good partner to another man if she is still heavily emotionally invested in her previous partner. She would be called an alpha widow. Few women I know are virgins but they are attracted to and heavily emotionally invested in fictional characters from anime😂..Now they want a man just like that character if not better. so they are alpha widows even though they are virgins.

[@detroitvcw]

...most women! This is a woman's form of pornography - Beauty and the beast, Tarzan, 2pac in a suit, etc...but yea, I was just saying that a woman that has been imprinted by 1 can be just as bad as the woman with a casual 20, depending on the nature of each figure.

[@ma2000]

They need to grow up 😅

[@beth9678]

Love your content! From your videos I’ve watched, so far about 20, this is the only piece I disagree with. “The more lovers she’s had the odds are stacked against you etc”. If you’re not a good lover then yes the odds are stacked against you because you’re not good in bed and it was underwhelming, but if you are a good lover then the odds are not stacked against you because a good lover is one of many qualities she values about a man. Sexual compatibility is part of the foundation for longevity. The only way both men and women learn is by experience which I realize is also the catch 22 in the equation.

[@darylsmith7495]

I don’t know what Planet you guys are from but when your mother finds out that your wife has a high body count, your marriage is over

[@pranshujagtap]

People should also ask a STD test report from other person before getting physical. If he or she refuses to provide their recent or latest STD report, then you already know the answer to your question. We need to normalise this.

[@jonprince3237]

100% agree. I really couldn't care less how many men, or women have been there before, but I very much care if they left anything behind to remember them by.

[@post-ri7dr]

Some data on STD tests. Some STD can't be detected right a way. Some could take months for it show up in the body and be detected. In that time, people could be spreading the stuff like crazy. Condoms don't give 100% protection also. Here is a quick list STD Incubation period chlamydia 7-21 days genital herpes 2-12 days gonorrhea 1-14 days hepatitis 15-50 days hepatitis B 8-22 weeks hepatitis C 2-26 weeks HIV 2-4 weeks HPV 1 month-10 years (depending on type) oral herpes 2-12 days syphilis 3 weeks-20 years (depending on type) trichomoniasis 5-28 days

[@post-ri7dr]

Some news on STD. Some std don't get detected right a way. Here a quick list. Condom don't give 100% protection. STD Incubation period chlamydia 7-21 days, genital herpes 2-12 days, gonorrhea 1-14 days, ,hepatitis A 15-50 days, hepatitis B 8-22 weeks, hepatitis C 2-26 weeks, HIV 2-4 weeks HPV 1 month-10 years (depending on type), oral herpes 2-12 days, syphilis 3 weeks-20 years (depending on type), trichomoniasis 5-28 days.

[@post-ri7dr]

Be careful with STD tests. Some std can take over a year before it show up in a STD test. Look it up for more details.

[@anonymissed3611]

That sort of sentiment doesn'tt get clicks on the ewe toob.

[@josiah5776]

Once again, spot on Dr. Taraban. Thanks for digging deeper into this complex topic. I was in a short relationship with a woman who had a low body count but a child from another man ... a man who I knew to be a loser who didn't stick around or help with his child, but she gave it up to him on the first date. Conversely she wanted to make me wait. I ended the relationship for the exact reasons you stated. Give it up to a loser, but make me wait. No thanks. See ya.

[@ma2000]

I totally get what you are saying, but maybe she was just trying to up her own standards? How do you expect her to do better if she continues on the same parh?

[@josiah5776]

@@ma2000 I agree with your observation and certainly cannot fault her for that. But by the same token, that doesn't mean I have to be on the receiving end of the downgrade, to her upgrade. Personal choices.

[@gintoki_sakata__]

​@@ma2000just cos you up your standards doesn't mean anyone should participate with you..

[@ACruz-kq9di]

You may have been the better man but based on her decision to make you wait she assumed you were the loser 😂 it’s like adding insult to injury

[@josiah5776]

@@ACruz-kq9di Exactly, yes. Great summation.

[@53Strat]

This explains my last date. I had no problem with her body count being 30 as mine is the same + some sexual encounters but all the other problems mentioned in this video were there. I fully agree here btw, women who had low body count were for that reason instantly emotionally invested in me, they started behaving like real spouse material in the 1st month. We had sex on the 1st day and nowhere did they indicate being a slut. However I have had that girl with the high body count let me wait 2 months before sex, 1st time for me in 5 years. She gave me an STD and had all kinds of issues. Thats where I learned women can simply be really attracted to you and you could be her best, regardless of them postponing sex or not. At the end of the day it became very clear to me body count does matter allot. Excellent video, thank you.

[@castiel4746]

hahahaha... " we had sex on the 1st day and nowhere did they indicated being a slut" hahahaha... dude you are just blind. but if you need to tell yourself that BS well....

[@MA-gu2up]

Wasn't it clear that the girl with the high body count will be a red flag? You probably had a lot of experience with such women, so you will know, right? I want to ask you, from your experience, who is more good looking, women with high or low body count?

[@jackmichaelbmx]

​@MA-gu2up low body count is easier for them to get emotional attachment to you and nothing better than having a girl whom is really in love with you.

[@ItsThiha]

No, actually hers is multiple times of 30.

[@53Strat]

@@MA-gu2up True, it was clear to me. I never really dated women who I deemed a slut or whatever. I think it had to do with the fact she made me wait, I wanted the chase. As bad as I do not want to admit it, I also thought she might be a special one regardless of my instant red flag feelings as she basicly stole me from her girlfriend I was talking to on the night we met. She was pretty intelligent and had some good points in regards to relationships and life so I gave her a pass. Its not the body count that was the issue for me at the start but it was that she had sexual encounters on her long vacation while we were texting non stop for months. Its that together with the STD that did it for me. I ended up fucking 2 other women as I did not take her serious anymore and eventually she felt something was off and wanted to break it off.

[@iohannesfactotum]

Let's not pretend that wanting a virgin and being ok with the village bicycle are in the same category

[@delisamajorsabbott2023]

Facts💯! A womans past matters to a man, and a mans future matters to a woman. I dont understand why so many women have an issue with men caring. Thats wild. Because I know women lie about their past, I dont volunteer my past. Im currently in a serious committed relationship for the last 14 months. I asked my man his thoughts about my past. He said it does matter to him but he doesnt want to know. He knows that I had married at the age of 20, divorced at 33, and have one child. My man also met me at the age of 34. He only asked me how long did I know my ex before marrying him and what age did I start having sex. I told him I had met my ex in high school. I started having sex at the age of 19. No, my ex wasnt my first. My boyfriend told me that was all he wanted to know. He is 47 years old, 13 years my senior. I think the fact that I dont come up with excuses not to sexually plz him is why he doesnt question my past. Or maybe he really doesnt want to know like he said 🤷🏾‍♀️.

[@showcase0525]

The number still holds significance. The issue is that the greater the number, the greater the chance of unwanted sexual value/enthusiasm exchange will be. So even if the example where they had a higher number of partners but low enthusiasm, that's a risk that they will all be low enthusiastic, as you ended the video with, you have a lower chance of being the top person with a higher number.

[@mrtuber3491]

Women use comparisons unequally. If a woman has been with 15 men she will compare you with all 15 on only their best qualities. All 15 could be mediocre overall but each one just needs one quality that’s great for her to see you and others as inferior for not matching and besting. That’s why the more men that runs through a woman the harder it is for any man to truly satisfy her because now she has an amalgamation of the perfect man to put you down with. They conveniently ignore their weaknesses. The hypergamy trait is her flaw in finding satisfaction.

[@pescatoralpursuit1726]

You know what time it is

[@mudblood9699]

There's truth to what your saying, but it mostly comes down to how good you fuck her, and her capacity to bond to you. Brain chemistry and whatnot.

[@fanofcodd]

Yeah , if there is money conversation , Thomas was rich .. if she get bored ... Jim was funnier. She feels unsafe ? Ben was 6'7 and he had no job so he could be here when needed. And she will resent you for that.

[@fudogwhisperer3590]

Body count is more about if she's been alpha widowed. No man, absolutely NO MAN wants to be her second choice. Promiscuity is also a marker for impulsivity, lack of forethought, lack of deductive reasoning lack of emotional control and ignoring mens desire for her to protect her innocence, a necessity in raising his offspring, his ability to condition her and teach her his specific needs and imprint on him.

[@sylviaschaffner2551]

This is a very patriarchal way to see women's sexuality. Protect her innocence? Meh

[@vishnujallim3760]

@@sylviaschaffner2551 nope data shows that the more bodycount woman have the more likely divorce is gona happen

[@sylviaschaffner2551]

@@vishnujallim3760 please cite this data from multiple sources pls

[@mudblood9699]

​@@sylviaschaffner2551It's totally accurate. When a woman is with a man for whom she does not have more desire for relative to all her previous lovers, the relationship is inherently unhealthy.

[@sylviaschaffner2551]

What is alpha widowed?

[@jn3750]

the best channel on KZbin. Period!

[@safwanlabeeb8029]

Orion with his pearls of wisdom

[@Im_Anthonyy]

Usually ur videos are little gems of knowledge, but in this one u highlighted something very obvious, we cant know and mostly cant trust women to be honest about her past experiences, so putting the metric in their total past partners is not bulletproof, but its the best measure we can have, because its logical to assume that more past partners equals more possibility of more diverse and deep (pun intented) past experiences lived by her

[@mathieuvilleneuve2510]

My current girlfriend and my ex had both a high bodycount and the long term relationship I had with both of them (7 years) is so hard to maintain. The sex have been incredible with both of them for 3/4 years but the long term desire problems appeared in the relation and changed it. I am not sure if the bodycount is what contributed to this because they remember past experiences and hold them to focus and work on the present engagement but I always doubted personally that it would be harder to satisfy that kind of woman for a lot of years.

[@st3vorocks290]

Thee thing is, body count is really a symptom of deeper issues(as Dr Taraban mentioned). This is often due to a person projecting their desires on to a potential partner, falling in love with the projection, then falling out of love once they manage to see through the projection. Also, if they have the mindset that relationships exist to make them happy(happiness being defined as a warm fuzzy feeling) they will think the relationship is doomed whenever it is not making them feel good. I've known a number of people who were addicted to that new relationship high and could not maintain a relationship once it faded.

[@sammyb1651]

You probably satisfied them over a longer period of time than anyone else though. So that's in the credit column. It's fairly pointless comparing long term sexual relationships to one-offs and short flings. We've all had insanely hot one nighters. The only difference is men are intelligent enough to know they don't mean sh!t and you can't go using them as a yardstick for anything else. This was yet another video that didn't really move the dial tbh, when you really examine what was said. "F your woman good". Firstly, no revelations there-but I'd question how much "fun" that is (as Orion claims). This is the woman's idea of "good" after all. If you listen to women describing "good" it virtually always involves them doing very little while someone else does all the work. Well...that tends to become less fun-filled after a while. What you actually want is a woman who's an active (and imaginative) participant. Body count is just a relatively decent heuristic for assessing long(er) term exclusivity at the end of the day. Thats all that really needed to be said.

[@mathieuvilleneuve2510]

@@sammyb1651 I am confident that I did because they told me that I am good at it but also they have never experienced a long love relationship like that before me. I am in a crisis with my current partner because she lacks sexual desire since we became parents and she use to think it is because she is not loving me anymore. At the same time she can't leave me so what @st3vorocks290 replied make a lot of sense.

[@edheldude]

There's also the biological factor that if you're not creating a family, people disengage. What's the point of an intimate relationship otherwise?

[@Diatom1k]

​@@edheldude agreed. Sex just for the sake of it gets boring if its not leading to replication

[@johnvannewhouse]

I love you, Orion, but you are shattering all my perceptions of relationships and the ability to conduct them.......

[@fosterkatchen7010]

This is an amazing video. The way you put the point across with hard facts, but still very articulate and educated, you can t beast it. You da man

[@DeaconChriss]

This brother explained this perfectly.