Breaking the Silence of Pregnancy Loss | Tanika Dillard | TEDxGreenville

[@nunyuhbusiness9016]

When my wife and I lost our 2nd baby in a row I was told by my parents to "take care of my wife" and "be there for her". No one was there for me. No one took care of me. No one said" sorry for your loss" or called me to see how I was doing. Men are too often overlooked, like it doesn't happen to them too. I'm very glad she touched upon that fact.

[@crystalinarodriguez3551]

i feel you its been 3 months since my first misscarriage & nobody is there for me accept my husband :(

[@TheSexytee21]

nunyuh business We just lost another baby may 2 2018 and I make sure I let ppl know my husband suffers too plz see after him as well I love and needed to hear this. Thank God im not alone

[@raheemahassan933]

am sorry for your lost, my husband was devestaded when we had our loss.

[@bannmclain5751]

I am sooo sorry for that!! I had my first miscarriage with my first ever (bf) at 17..and he genuinely felt for me.. tried to help.. did everything he could. When we broke up 2 1/2 years later I went back to get my last box of items out of our apartment. He was balling. Sat with him..he had a few drinks and balled some more.. he finally got the nerve ?I guess? to say what was on his mind. It wasn't his recent (not ours..but his new relationship).or family..or a friends. He kept saying how much he wanted HIS baby.. his little girl(I somehow felt it was a girl) we had already named her Sophia Marie. I saw a broken... (terriblely) broken man that day. He had already told his new gf about it etc. I honestly didn't know how hard it was for him. I watched with my own eyes his stuggle. I married a year later and since have had several.... several more miscarriages. But..my husband doesn't talk about them.. won't talk about them when I want to..etc. All I know is as much as I love him.. there was someone in my life that truly cared and actually grieved his child (my ex).. Men do deserve recognition!!!. I think sometimes as women we feel like we are the only ones suffering. And in my case.. I was partly right. My ex was upset.. my current husband doesn't get upset or even console me. Idk. Just says to get over it.But I'm happy you spoke out.. I am truly.. truly sorry for your loss...and for your wife and her loss as well. It's horrible. I hope and pray you are doing well now. Oh..and my ex has 3 GIRLS now.. I knew he'd make little princesses!! And..I have only one....son.. and a step son.

[@chantelletibbs]

I am very sorry for your loss and for people's indifference

[@leelashammy]

I've lost my first baby at 8weeks... it's not easy but with God I will. To my angle in heaven 🕊️👣

[@steviemichelle7371]

I lost my baby at 7 weeks on the 23rd of April. I still think about it everyday and it still makes me sad. Unless you’ve had a miscarriage it’s hard to understand how losing someone you’ve never met can be so painful.

[@jannahlee7400]

Stevie Michelle I lost my baby at 7 weeks as well on Feb. 6. Today is the 5 month since I lost my baby and I feel like I'm dying

[@steviemichelle7371]

Jannah Lee I’m so sorry. I know it’s hard but trust me it’ll get easier. I still have moments where I feel sad about it but it’ll get easier. ❤️ Talk with someone about how you’re feeling. Another baby will never replace the one you lost but I find comfort in knowing that most women who have one miscarriage will go on to have a healthy pregnancy the next time around. Also,I’m here if you ever need to talk. ❤️ Sending you my thoughts.

[@renpatman]

I also lost my baby at an early stage and I was never prepared for how that would shatter my world! I honestly wish people would just say sorry instead of try to find reason. It's the most painful thing!

[@lilithssilvermoon3208]

Stevie Michelle I’m sorry for your loss Mama

[@jasminoliver2034]

It’s terrible

[@sblkay6315]

One of the worst thing about miscarriage is feeling isolated by so called friends. They got silent and didn't even reach it or took forever to do so. You expect them to help you through or even check on you, but they don't. It's frustrating and hurtful.

[@rachelford5313]

I'm so sorry, i am one of 4 as well.

[@Creoletmarie]

Breycion 10/29/08 Jijaga 04/02/17 Sankara 10/29/17 Thank you for standing up for us.

[@vlada3654]

😢😢😢 very similar to me

[@parisa5014]

God bless. My baby sage vera 5/10/19

[@jaleelmuhammadhassan7084]

😢 kamal October/ 2017 Samarah 11/10/21

[@karolrenee5497]

I've suffered two back to back second trimester miscarriage due to incompetent cervix. I didn't realize how much it effected me psychologically. It was like time stood still....when I came back to reality...a whole year had passed. My husband was gone, my kids were broken and so was I. I turned into a monster....full of hurt, guilt, embarrassment, saddness and anger. I did EVERYTHING RIGHT!!! Never touched a drink, took my vitamins, went to EVERY Dr appointment and ate balanced meals. What made matters worse is when I finally felt I had the strength to return to work, a coworker in my department had announced she was 4 months pregnant...having to watch her journey thru her pregnancy was rough. Especially since she would come to work boasting about her weekend of partying..drinking and smoking..she would talk about how the Baby was such a burden since her and the dad were just a fling. It cut like a knife having baby showers at work, it crushed me when she decided to name her baby the same name I was naming mine. Kairo... 😔 it felt like a cruel joke!! What did I do God??? I'm currently seeking therapy for myself and my children while trying to get my husband to understand the hurt I was feeling psychologically...and to make him see that I am sorry for the hurt and destruction of myself and our relationship 😣😔😔

[@laasiabrown1601]

I felt your story on so many levels I'm currently having to deal with pregnancy being thrown in my face or people telling me how bad a parent treats there children and here we are woman who did everything right and would LOVE to have there children here and they arent. My doctor told my my cervix was incompetent aswell...I stand with you.

[@vITALEmpress]

So sorry for your pain. How are you now?

[@ChrisOkada]

Update please

[@lalaa555]

You do have a husband and children... gratitude is a virtue. Envy is a deathly sin.

[@karolrenee5497]

@@vITALEmpress My "husband" ended up meeting someone new and got her pregnant within months. They had a baby girl

[@Brittanybeautician]

I know this video is from last year but this woman touched my heart, I lost my daughter at 20 weeks and to know I'm not alone and there are women who understand and are supportive really means the world

[@quasimmc3623]

Hi Brittany sorry for your loss also truly I miscarried at 13 weeks and have been heartbroken deep inside I checked this video out as I'm a lil depressed during the holidays.hopefully this video helped a little as it helped me 💌

[@everbless2468]

i loss my bby girl too at 22 wks the pain is so much please God help me!

[@lifeaskowanna]

Brittany Beautician You’re definitely not alone! I just lost my baby girl on May 22. She was 19 weeks old. I can’t really talk to my mom about it because she’s never had a miscarriage. This pain hurts so bad I can’t explain it. I miss my princess so bad. She was my fiancé and I first child. I visit her grave every week. I’m about to try counseling because I really need to talk to someone.

[@deekircher21]

Brittany Beautician I know your pain. I just lost my son at 20 weeks

[@ellamounts]

We too lost our daughter at 20 weeks. It's been three months since, and today was the great burialday for us and all the other families who miscarried in the past three months. I'm gaining a sense of relief and closure. You're so not alone.

[@mikalasimon5764]

Currently going through a miscarriage.. and even before watching this I have been openly grieving and talking about my loss because I felt that the only way for me to heal properly was to let myself break, and let myself grieve as hard as I need to.. and honestly this speech reassured me that what I’ve been doing, is healthy and good 😭

[@missld6856]

Women need to talk about it more often it’s the only thing that helped me go through it knowing im not alone. I lost 2 pregnancies within 5 months lost one at 12 weeks and another at 9 weeks . I want a baby so badly. Wishing for all who are suffering to find peace in their healing ❤️‍🩹

[@plotupinthemoment]

My husband and I lost our first child to miscarriage just a few days ago at 8 weeks. Thank you for your message.

[@Dr_Sludge]

@manchter We Just lost our 8 week baby 2 days ago. How are you doing, and is there any advise you could give a mother and father that could have been?

[@aliyyahshaba1702]

@@Dr_Sludgein heaven it will be according to the Bible you will not even remember your pain. Rev. 21 Verses 1 to 4 He will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself will be with them; [4] he will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain any more, for the former things have passed away. "

[@Letstalkpositive-lov]

I will forever keep these word with me ( being silent helps no one ) I've had two miscarriages two girls i miss them so most . But with gods help I'll tell my story because being silent helps no one .

[@tanikadillard1851]

Thank you for using your voice!!! ❤

[@Letstalkpositive-lov]

@tanikadillard1851 🥹🫶🫶🫶

[@tinnythornton7272]

I JUST had a miscarriage and THIS is what I NEEDED to hear!😭💔 He was going to be a BOY🥺💙 I CANT tell yall how painful it is just going through IT generally! I thank GOD everyday for my babygirl he already gave me! 😭💕 R.I.P my baby boy Danny Ray Marquez 🥺💙💙🙏🏾

[@tanikadillard1851]

I'm so very sorry for the passing of your son, Danny.

[@elisemartin8189]

Ive lost two. The 2nd one hit so much harder. The guilt of feeling like I did something wrong to lose her does not seem to go away.

[@vanessacastro-alcocer2602]

I needed to hear this. I lost my first and only baby at 21 weeks, Xavier, on March 13, 2020. It will be a year soon. I am still heart broken and terrified of the future. I need to find my "Michelle" to help me reach "angelic refrain."

[@Luck-fq3uj]

It’s my baby’s anniversary today. I miss them so much, I never thought it would still hurt, they would have been almost 2. Glad to see your comments still every year.

[@micro_premie_storymaker_club]

sending you big hugs

[@christinajanner1500]

Payton Rhiannan born 4/23/20 at 21 weeks Thank you for your voice. We were so grateful to at least be able to hold her for a few hours.

[@mayaholmesjohnson8074]

I enjoyed this video. Our 1st baby was stillborn @ 35 weeks on 4/22/2016 2 days before my birthday. You are so right about husbands needing support. As s result I started a ministry S.A.I.L survival after infant loss.

[@sharonotao8546]

😢😢😢😢😢

[@HG-gj9lh]

This is the best Ted talk I've heard yet.

[@morgancarpenter2304]

I watched this video along time ago when I was in my early twenties, at the time I didn't realize how important it would become to me. I lost my twin boys in August at 21 weeks and I just found this video again. Thank you so much ❤

[@juiceyyyshae8490]

I just lost my Twin boys 10/10/22 I'm hurt beyond measures...Me and my partner are taking it a day at a time

[@sarablundell3430]

Such a powerful speech. I am so very sorry for your loses. My husband and I lost our daughter Nell 5 months ago at 30 weeks pregnant. I thought I could deal with it on my own and focus entirely on our 1st daughter Lilly, but I am finding it more difficult as the time progresses. Even though I talk about what happened to us with my friends, it is not getting any easier. You have convinced me to seek profesional help. Thank you!

[@angko-pe]

Sara B I am so sorry for your loss! I hope and pray you will find support in professional help!

[@pixieambler4579]

All my love to you. How are you doing?

[@purplesomeone]

No words. Just vehement sobs. 😭

[@brendawalton2518]

Erin (Aaron?) (6 weeks), Luke (13 weeks). The third only lasted 5 weeks. My husband named the first 2. He cried over Luke. He burried them. Before the miscarriages we had a daughter. She's 5 now. My husband prayed over my body. God will give us a son, He wants us to name him Gabriel. Waiting is not easy. I'm preparing, I hope I will be ready.

[@arieldelaney7727]

This helped me, grieving my own loss.

[@ladyzuwe9122]

I just lost triplets at 12weeks and 6days. They were going to be my sons. Ohoo it’s so painful. I need an angel to help me get through this. Thanks for the video and speaking out

[@bannmclain5751]

Thank you God for this woman and her husband. I've only had one live birth out of 6 pregnancies..but in own opinion 7..( I wasn't treated but I know for sure I had missed my period and far too much tissue/etc was coming out) the count is harsh. But I have honestly never...ever..dealt with even a single one. I truly believe I have some sort of PTSD.. especially because of a horrible experience with one miscarriage that I didn't have a dnc for..but a pill. I bled constantly.. me and my husband were separated..I remember blood all over and trying to clean it up..and my self alone.. and a day later a huge..huge mass coming out of me. No one I know has had a miscarriage let alone as many as I have. It's hard to talk to anyone. After watching this.. I am going to seek help. I've never mentioned this to my pshychiatrist..never talk about it. Stops now. I need closure..and healing.

[@kaci001]

I lost my Russell 27 weeks along, ty for sharing your story

[@officialheathercombseardrp559]

Lord bless you, you're making Dentiny, Brianna and Madison so proud! I lost my granddaughter, Aurora, at 26 weeks. Thank you for your courage!!

[@megthenatural6081]

I have lost 3 baby in a row all at different stages. I grieved them all in different ways and the second was particularly devastating. I try to talk about them all as much as possible and hold out hope for the future that one day I will be lucky enough to become a mother!

[@seeferie5034]

I just lost my 2nd pregnancy both at 21 weeks. Lord what a hurtful pain

[@tanikadillard1851]

I'm so very for losses. I hope you are surrounded by great love and support as you journey forward.

[@Lemons19902010]

I lost my baby at 7 weeks and we didn't find out until I went to my ultrasound at 11 weeks on Good Friday this year. I had a missed miscarriage and ended up naturally miscarrying the following week. I've never felt a pain like this before.😢 I know that my baby is safe in Heaven and I can't wait to meet him/her one day.

[@wangarinjuki5665]

😢😢

[@leidinabruno2810]

Just happen to me yesterday 😢

[@Lemons19902010]

@@leidinabruno2810 I'm so sorry to hear that! How are you doing? It's been w years for me. I keep a picture of my baby's ultrasound on my bookshelf.

[@wangarinjuki5665]

The same happened to me on 23rd June 2023-still grieving as I try to come to terms with everything

[@iyalookayumbu9755]

Happened to me 30th June 2023 and i'm in intense pain?people don't seem to understand the pain

[@raheemahassan933]

I have experienced miscarriage at 16 weeks about two weeks ago, I was suffering in silence, this talk is very inspirational and I really needed to watch this

[@missld6856]

Thank you Tanika Dillard for sharing your stories and your message. 💝I had 2 losses and no babies yet you give me hope and strength

[@RemedyFibers]

Thank you so much. I lost my baby at 5 weeks and now I am ready to learn more and understand more. I choose to end my silence. thank you

[@34Packardphaeton]

. My wife and I lost our first three... but were blessed to be able to raise our last three. .

[@tanikadillard1851]

Blessings to you and your family

[@alexandramendizabal2143]

This made me cry 😭 I’m currently going through a pregnancy loss.

[@artetanya]

me too 😞

[@yoboyman9384]

Me too 😭

[@Kakakakakak12444]

We just lost our dear daughter at 22 weeks. My wife had to give birth to our dead daughter. I had the chance to hold her for the first and last time in my life. I know there is better days coming and Im trying to stay strong for my wife but I´m broken. Thanks for this video it helped me relate

[@hannahpolan1818]

Thank you for sharing your story. I miscarried at 8 weeks. Wishing everyone in the comments who have also lost their baby/babies my heartfelt condolence. It is such a hard thing to experience.

[@MyMy-ok8so]

I lost my baby boy Amadi on the evening of my birthday. It hurts to the core. But you have helped me thank you for the encouragement. I never saw my husband cry like it did the night my water broke. I grieve for all women and men who suffer from such a cause.

[@CMD.22]

Thank You!! For Breaking the Silence! May God Bless your family. I add to the list of women who will share with you that I also lost a daughter Courtney in 2014 who was stillborn. Your story is powerful and God's hand in your life is beautiful. Please continue to utilize this platform to open doors for change.

[@tanikadillard1851]

Thank you so much for watching and sharing about your precious daughter, Courtney. I appreciate your support. Let's endeavor to continue to change the face of pregnancy loss by breaking the silence.

[@nana_2_6]

There are no coincidences when you walk in the Spirit! Saving Our Babies & Family Engagement is a faith-based agency created to connect and bring comfort to families who have experienced infant loss. I plan to use this clip in the presentations I provide for local churches around this issue called "the silent crisis". THANK YOU SO MUCH for following God's leading and sharing your story. I may use this clip on Saving Our Babies & Family Engagement's Facebook page on upcoming Mothers and Father's Day. I invite you to visit the Facebook page and website at www.savingourbabies.org. Thank you again. Blessings.

[@shersolis6261]

I lost my baby 9 days after i give birth to him. Our little angel was our first baby. It was a really tough time for me and my husband. I am glad to know that there are support groups who can be can be of helped and knows what i am going through.

[@Atikin09]

I've listened to this talk after each of my losses over the past few years, and each time I'm encouraged and inspired me to share my story. Thank you.💕

[@mizzjamie82]

I lost my twins 3 weeks ago at 22w. Thank you for sharing your experience.

[@callisyedita388]

Yes Tanika. It is good that you have decided to break this silence. I believe many women have been suffering in silence. Literally you are like the voice for the many. You may feel like you see babies and pregnancy everywhere you look after a loss. TV commercials, baby shower invitations, and even walking past the diaper aisle in the grocery store may begin to bother you. You may feel jealous of pregnant women and mothers of new babies, especially those who seem to get pregnant easily. If so, your feelings are normal and valid, but knowing that may not make you feel better. Give yourself space to grieve. Expect to have to deal with the five stages of grief: Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression and acceptance. Friends and family may provide comfort, additional stress, or both. They may be unable to relate to your feelings and say unintentionally hurtful things to you, even if they’re trying to help. If your support network isn’t helping, consider finding a support group. A support group at Bio tex was so helpful to me that I am really happened that I got to know about it earlier. Rather than drowning myself into depression.

[@beckyxiong3578]

I'm currently going through my second miscarriage and I'm so thankful to watch your video. I agree that I do not need to be silent about this topic. I understand it is a very sensitive and private matter but holding it in does nothing for me but remain mentally and emotionally reck. Talking about it gives me a sense of relief and sharing my feelings out loud gives me a voice for my babies.

[@juliemorgan-bullock6149]

Such courage and bravery and wisdom. Thank you for your voice.

[@ladyblakeney]

Thank you for talking about this. It's so important that we feel able to share our experiences and find support.

[@TheCarissaFoundation-zv9yx]

Thank you bringing this taboo subject to light. We need to support each other through this difficult time. I finally have my rainbow baby.

[@greenandyellowhearts5053]

We lost our baby April 2020 amd I still cry my self to sleep. I dread for September to come because he shoul’ve been born by then. So many questions left unanswered..

[@shellowu07]

Encouraging and beautiful video. My daughter Zera arrived alive but too soon to survive at 18 weeks. We will remember her and honour her memory! 12.11.22 🕊️🌱

[@mariaguild2024]

what a strong women! and family! I cant even fathom the pain!! I just lost my baby at 11 weeks, but I can't even imagine this Womens pain. soo heart breaking!!!

[@Woundedbuterflynj]

I’m on my fourth miscarriage as we speak and it hurts so bad not physically but mentally and spiritually

[@JNCPiano]

Thank you so much

[@favoureverton4488]

Thank you ma 😭😭 I just lost baby 2 days ago.and this was my fourth pregnancy lost.but this time around I promised to myself that i wil not cry itrue iddnt cry

[@blair7484]

I’ve experienced three losses and after the third I started to speak up and also found that many had common experiences, and also suggestions and advice which I welcomed. I don't have any children yet, but my one healthy baby is coming. ❤

[@shi3402]

I lost my baby at 10 weeks. 2 weeks later and I’m still passing tissue. I haven’t talked to anyone about it. I’ve shut everyone out and act like I’m okay but I’m not. This is so unfair.

[@sherritaunton7975]

Tanika you are amazing! What a beautiful testimony to the power of breaking the silence for any issue. God is going to use you in a special way to reach so many people.

[@haileyshields468]

I have had a therapist for a year now so that I could discuss the loss of my baby but I have yet to talk to her about it. I have etsd from the way that we lost her. I can't talk about her out loud to anybody besides my husband. When I try my heart physically hurts and I start to cry and then I can't breathe so I just choose to be silent so I don't know what's worse or more painful. I'm coming up on her what should have been 2 year birthday and I am really struggling from all the things that I've missed all the things that won't be to experience and teach her things that she would have taught us. Thank you for sharing your story I've noticing that this was posted 6 years ago so I wonder if you are closer to your night's number now. I hope that you are blessed healthy and happy I hope that I can figure out a way get over this I relate to a lot of what you said my least favorite quote is God needed another angel not a fan of that

[@calilahwoods763]

Yes Tanika, thank you for opening up. Whenever a pregnancy loss happens, you’re likely to experience many feelings and reactions. Though you can’t wish them away, understanding them will eventually help you come to terms with your loss. Many people who suffer a loss of any type go through a number of steps on their road to emotional healing. There may be numbness and disbelief, the feeling that this couldn’t have happened to me. This is a mental mechanism designed to protect your psyche from the trauma of loss. Desperate to pin the blame for such a senseless tragedy on something. You may blame it on yourself. Like telling yourself ‘I must have done something wrong to cause the miscarriage’ or “If I’d been happier about the pregnancy, the baby would still be alive.” Or you may blame others, God, for letting this happen, or your practitioner (eve if there is no reason to). You may feel resentful and envious of those around you who are pregnant or who are parents, and even have fleeting feelings of hatred for them. Some therapist are good at helping getting over the emotional turmoil. My therapist at Bio tex really helped me a lot get over such an incident.

[@crhea1293]

Wow....aftwr losing a child and deciding I didn't want to try again, talking to Profesionals, just being hurt and angry, this is the first thing that have lit the fire again. Tha k you for sharing your story

[@ALS-TOYS]

I'm a son who's been by the side of my mother of all 3 of her pregnancy losses I'm the eldest of 8 counting the 4 lost babies. The 3 occurred yesterday I'm in a deep amount of pain this made me feel a little better to hear about I don't feel as alone although I'm still confused about what God has had in mind all this time

[@tebogosophymoagi7463]

I gave birth to a stillborn at 39 weeks, it has been 2 months & 13 days but it feels like it happened yesterday. I try to be strong but the truth is that I'm not okay... Everything was fine but at the final month his heart just stopped. I always ask myself questions, but don't find answers. I sometimes blame myself for this bcz I was carrying him for 9months, why couldn't I notice that something is wrong?I now feel like I'm not a women enough because I failed to bring my son into this world. This thing is eating me day & night

[@babinefertiti7644]

I'm so sorry for your loss! I know how you feel I was pregnant with twins and my water broke at 23 1/2 weeks my first baby boy came out but died hours later as I held him... my other son held on for 26 days! We all thought he would make it then he suddenly got NEC and died. I question it daily the hows, whys and what ifs and even though I know there are no real answers I still search for one but even if I had an answer it wouldn't help anyway. But it eats me too day and night... my heart is so broken I can barely go on. I just want a way out... to know this will end one day but I don't think it will. Having more won't replace the ones that I lost and thats who I want. I want my baby boys!

[@dennakilpatrick8594]

Please don't blame yourself, TEBOGO SOPHY. God knows you wanted the best for your child. The enemy wants you to hurt, and then blame yourself for your pain. Praying for peace in your heart to come.

[@tshimangadzomavhungu3563]

I know this is the old post but I'm going through the same thing but my advice is too seek a professional help too I Lost my daughter at 23weeks 5weeks ago and all I wanted was to stop myself from breathing as I couldn't go on with life I'm still in a long way of recovering but taking steps each day and seeing that I'm not alone in this it makes it easier too

[@sadiasalma4356]

I did the same. I had infection but I didn’t notice it. I thought it to be a mild thrush but it was bacterial vaginosis unfortunately and because of my negligence my son spent two painful days in an incubator and after that he left us

[@pamelaollivierra2381]

​@sadiasalma4356 HI dear I've been thru the same with the diagnose of BV my water bag broke at 21 weeks 1 day

[@katyak5664]

Thank you, i felt so alone.

[@fasihashaikh4814]

I had two miscarriages and lost one child when he was 3 years old and recently lost a baby 🤍🕊 on 23rd April 2020

[@jo-annmatsuis121]

I am so sorry

[@AT-zl6dk]

2 pregnancy losses March 2022 🦋 6 weeks February 16,2023 🦋9 weeks ( Serenity) We’re coping as best as we can. We just found out more information, this pregnancy had chromosomal defects. It’s just shocking because I was checked weekly up to week 7 & saw our little one thriving with a strong heart rate. But my 12 week appointment revealed the devastating news that the baby had stopped developing at 9 weeks. I had no symptoms at all. I was carrying my baby unaware the demise. It’s real people say some interesting things relating to pregnancy loss and if I’m not careful it can hurt deeply. So I just shared the news with a few people that knew about our pregnancy. So true it’s a lot of women revealing their stories. We should express ourselves more relating to pregnancy loss.

[@charletmokomele2452]

Bless your heart TD. ❤❤❤❤

[@evitaevita98]

I'm currently pregnant, but learning that I've miscarried. This will be my 5th miscarriage. It still feels as painful as the frist miscarriage I ever had. I pray for solace to all those women who have lost their babies.

[@luvinlife225]

Beautiful!! Thank you dear sister.

[@Sardinianheart]

I'm sitting here on the sofa, watching this and so many emotions are running through my heart. Two months ago we lost Giovanni, our eighth child. We are lucky enough to have three beautiful boys, aged 9, 6 and 4, but the names of our 5 children in heaven are also seared in our hearts: Angelo, Maria Pina, Celeste, David and Giovanni. Thank you Tanika for speaking out against the prejudice that casts a shadow of shame over pregnancy loss. I come from a small town, where "you don't tell, because people might think there's something wrong with you" and this makes me sick to my stomach. People who speak like this are normally the ones who have been lucky never to lose a child. Our three boys are growing up knowing how precarious life can be and therefore how it is the greatest gift we have. They really really would have loved to have another baby brother or sister, but they know that God has a plan for each and everyone of us, and some of us are called to bigger tasks that they can only accomplish in heaven. They know they have five siblings with Jesus, that are part of our family life and they sometimes tell us how they feel they protect us. However, no matter how at peace my wonderful husband and I are and how much we feel and accept God's will in our lives, it hurts. It hurts so much when I think about what could have been, especially since a very close friend of mine, who is like a sister to me, is pregnant and we were supposed to give birth roundabout the same time. Tonight I cried. I cried because another dream crumbled that October morning, when they told us there was no heartbeat any more and I had to deliver our perfect 19 week old baby after I had had to deliver our 17 week old baby boy just 21 months earlier, due to an entagled umbilical cord. I cried because I fear that everyone who knows my pain might think I'm not deeply happy for my friend, BUT I AM!!! My tears have nothing to do for the gratitude I feel for the fact that everything's going well for her. I cried because I never wanted my beloved husband to have to go through this pain again. But then, our three boys came to me and we curled up in a big hug which my husband completed with his arms. I have come to understand that these events, having to hand back five children in 12 years of marriage is what has made us so strong together. My husband is my rock, my lighthouse who leads me back to God every time the questions creep up in me..."Why? Why us?? Why us again???" We cry together, we pick each other up again. There's a reason for everything and the most conforting thing to me is that God does not ask us to understand, He asks us to TRUST Him...and I do! I want to send a big hug to all mothers, fathers, siblings and any suffering relative of a baby who had to leave them so soon. You are not alone. God bless you!

[@Greywind920]

Pregnancy loss and stillbirth have TONS of attention and charities and all kinds of things and people raising awareness and supporting the cause. It’s child loss that doesn’t get the awareness it needs. Nobody wants to talk about toddlers and children dying or help the devastated parents left behind. I speak from firsthand experience as a mother who has had 4 miscarriages followed by the unexpected and sudden death of my healthy, almost three year old daughter. I had more than enough support for the miscarriages but when my grown child died nobody was there and nobody is “comfortable” acknowledging she ever existed now that she’s gone and it hurts my heart almost as much as losing her did. Even then people are only around for a short time so they can humble brag to others about how they were “there for you” and then they’re gone if they were ever around at all. Nobody wants to help grieving mothers and fathers unless it was only a miscarriage or stillbirth, people figure it’s not as bad since you never knew the child or so I’m told. And they’re more worried about their own comfortability than supporting a griever. God forbid bad things happen to people... can’t have any negativity in your lives, can’t handle that kind of stuff, blah blah blah... never mind how the parents of the dead child feel.

[@pixieambler4579]

Greywind92 im so sorry for the loss of your little girl. I can't even imagine your pain. I hope you find a good grief counselor to help you through the hardest time of a parents life xxx

[@dimakatsomasalis9483]

I had a miscarriage a week ago im so sad cant stop crying wish i can talk to someone who understands how emotionally im feeling 💔😭

[@artsymusician8041]

I lost 5 of my baby siblings. I'm the oldest in my family of 16. It's my job to take care of them. In the last two years 3 died in a row. I'm scared of it. It hurts and I'm so scared it's going to happen again. I hate seeing my mom sad like that. I hate how insensitive some of my younger siblings can be about it. I know they will understand someday. It still hurts. Thank you for this

[@kingdomtruth7773]

I can relate. I’m a wife and mother of a 7 1/2 year old, whom I had naturally and miraculously at age 46. The 2nd time I became pregnant I 52 and I was of course wonderfully surprised. Yes, and it natural without any help from man, but God was the one did it, who allowed me to conceive. However, sadly experienced a miscarriage Dec. 10 into 11 of 2021. I cried and cried 😢 wishing, hoping, praying there was a way I could stop it. But the Lord knows why. However, even in my pain I asked the Lord to heal my mind, my heart. He did in a very short period of time. As a Word of encouragement the Lord Scripture says the following for us women, Verse: 13 “For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. Verse:14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Verse:15 My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Verse:16 Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.” (Psalm 139:13-16). Yes, the Lord can do the impossible, “He maketh the barren woman) to keep house, and to (be a joyful mother of children). Praise ye the LORD.” (Psalm 113:9). Next, “Lo, (children are an heritage) of the LORD: and (the fruit of the womb) is his reward.” (Psalm 127:3). Also, for those already have at least one child or several children“ Train up a (child) in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.” (2 Timothy 3:15). Finally, for, the youth or young adults, “Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy (youth),…” (Ecclesiastes 12:1). Also, when they need Godly counsel to keep them on the right path, “Wherewithal shall a (young man) cleanse his way? by taking heed thereto according to thy word.” (Psalm 119:6) ❤ May the Lord continue to give grace and comfort the many women who may never have had a child before, including those who became mothers, but who are experiencing fertility issues or who have had miscarriages, making it difficult to have another child. When it happened to me, I never would have believed it to happen to me, but God knows. We live in a sinful world and due the Eve’s original sin at creation, we all suffer because of it. However, God’s grace will see us through, especially for those who receive Christ as Lord and Savior. God is still doing great things, in spite of test, trials and disappointments in this life. God is still good and has blessed us even though we experience this misfortune. He has better things in store for all His believing children in the earth made new. Read (Isaiah 65:17-19) and Revelation 21:1-4). See Reklamation Ministries.

[@Kmarialay]

You don’t know how much this helped me.. thank you, truly… 💔😭

[@chooyoshida1846]

Sakura Lalisa Rosè March 30,2018 She died last march 30, 2018 at 8 weeks. That was the most painful thing that ever happened to me. I didnt know i was pregnant then, people told me that its not meant for me. But i want that child. People tell me to get over it.. it is not easy, so after that i remain silent. Because sometimes the only person who can understand me is myself.

[@malugurl04]

Amen, My son John is in heaven!

[@julissasarahimendoza3601]

I just lost my baby last week on Tuesday. Thank you for this video. 😢

[@tanikadillard1851]

I'm so sorry to know your Son died. Please know that you're not alone and there are communities available to support you. Please don't go through this experience alone.

[@julissasarahimendoza3601]

@ thank you so much. This means so much. 😞🩷

[@semragn4691]

So there have been a loss awareness. I have not known about this. I am also told that on October 15th every year at 7pm one should light candle for one hour in memory of the lost children. Actually it is a baby loss awareness week. Which starts from 9th to 15th October. This is good to have the awareness week. Hopeful it does help parents who lost their children even before they could see them. It looks like it is a sentimental period for parents who have been through loss. I went through loss and I know what it feels. If it was not of Bio texcom clinic I could still be here grieving of my loss. But I had to learn to walk out of the pain. To build myself more. Focus on the positivity. As that was one of the ways that could help me move forward. I am now looking forward to have another child. I do hope with the awareness it will help parents move on.

[@adrianaguillen9799]

I lost 2 babies. This one is the hardest, I’m separating from my partner and I need him so much to be by my side and go through this together

[@pooh1twin]

This really helped me!! Thank I! I just lost my pregnancy, and yes it hurts as much as if I had the child.

[@zahraejaz9591]

Thank you. I lost my baby at 16 weeks.

[@Jerzey_grl]

I just lost my baby at 13 weeks, it's devastating. I saw her in an ultrasound in the afternoon and a few hours later I saw her lifeless body in the toilet. Why did this happen? Why?!

[@mrsdutchess15]

My bby girl passed at 25 weeks November 4th . This time has been horrible and all ppl say is it’s gods will,wasn’t meant to be etc . Or that I should be over it within two weeks .

[@jolantamorgan9491]

So true! Thank youxx

[@LouveniaMusic]

Omg crying for them. 😢 so heartbreaking.

[@abenigold6219]

I just lost my baby yesterday at 6 weeks. I’m so heartbroken 💔 ❤Madison ❤

[@faithcharitybryant9445]

Loss my first child on Oct 7, 2018... 17weeks❤

[@janaystockton6969]

Lost my first born @ 37 weeks after birth Tahj October 9, 2018

[@faithcharitybryant9445]

@@janaystockton6969 aww so sorry for your loss... .. God has a bigger plan / Bigger blessing in store for us.

[@janaystockton6969]

@@faithcharitybryant9445 Thank you and I'm trying to see it that way its hard

[@faithcharitybryant9445]

@@janaystockton6969 You dont have to tell me everyday is a challenge for me... I constantly re-live that day over and over again..I cry nonstop on some days..sleep on other days to make the pain go away . I keep God first thats the only way im making it through.. I pray for peace and comfort & understanding ... God gives & takes away but he can also replace what he took times 2... so keep your head up ..you are not alone hun ipy !! God bless ⚘💖❤ We have sweet Angels watching over us that we will meet again one day 🍃🌹🍃

[@cassandrac-emma5651]

Thank you so much. really it takes someone who has experienced it to truly understand. I didn't really understand it too until it happened to me. it's really not been easy but by God's grace I'm pulpy through

[@keyana-theartist4582]

Thank you, this help me no that I have voice. I did lost a baby last year by miscarriage and I am still try to get over it. No only that my sister going through same thing. She had still born last year it died and then she got a baby again and then she lost that one again. Yes, it can be hard now I have to fight with my other person who still fight as thinks is my fault but things do happen. I am learning how to lean on God and keep going.

[@mimisakomi2816]

Thank you so very much for this video, I think it is the silence. So I am too going to break the silence and talk about my loss. May God bless you more.

[@marthasitali9215]

the pain of miscarriage is very hard just going through it

[@caitiew8075]

I just lost my baby at 9 weeks. Thank you for this message.

[@parisa5014]

Girl what was the answer for carrying a pregnancy to term!? I have had all losses only 😭 removed my septum, treated my clotting disorder.... Next is treating my mild endometriosis and seeing if that works. Why do some of us get cursed with this😭

[@kathymcafee]

Beautiful talk and important message. Thank you Tanika. Your voice is powerful and compassionate!

[@louisecrawford7379]

This is a beautiful message. So comforting. 👏🏻💞

[@maliksiebacheu4524]

Thank you.

[@camillenanjala6078]

This is amazing. Wh0o knew someone could undergo through such pain and still come out strong. I am so encouraged with this. It does really mean a lot. Many couples have been through loss. It is such a painful scenario to undergo. Especially if one had been trying to conceive for long. The pain hits your heart like an arrow. Only the strong women can manage to deal with this. In such a case I am amuse of how this woman could afford to be this strong. Not only that but to turn the negative energy to something meaningful. I went through a successful IVF in Bio texcom not knowing what laid ahead. It was such a painful experience. After months of grieving. I later decided to start my journey of conceiving again. This time with a different mindset. The miscarriage had really taught me a lot.

[@vintagedarling4468]

7 weeks and 3 days today and I lost my baby this morning...

[@nalinthalala6204]

Wonderful woman you are. I am with you on helping and sharing this journey. To be able to find a way to get through this. I am inspired to talk more. I blog too. Have wanted to do a you tube video and speak about my experience of pregnancy loss because god , faith , believing has truly helped me. So many of us ladies have suffered in silence.. we are stronger than we think and together we can hold each other up with prayer and love and the right words.. 😘

[@teresastramandinoli6629]

This is so amazing ❤❤❤

[@heatherelliott6133]

Thank you!

[@baileycampbell6811]

This is beautiful im lost for words

[@SarasGovender-ox5vu]

I've had a still born at 38 weeks due to negligence of the hospital and I'm in so much pain n dnt know how to get over this my bby Chloe skyla is only reminded by a picture n my bby dad left due to this.