Bring Back Smoking on Planes

We've had it with Amish people, motherhood and hideous bedazzled cups. Host of the Bitch Bible, Jackie Schimmel, hops on and proudly boasts about leaving her baby behind while she galavants around Paris.
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I've Had It Podcast: @Ivehaditpodcast
Jennifer Welch: @mizzwelch
Angie "Pumps" Sullivan: @pumpspumpspumps
Special Guest: Jackie Schimmel ‪@TheBitchBible‬

[@jennl7099]

I’m 55 y/o , never wanted kids , never had them. My life is awesome. Been married to same guy for 33 years. To all the women who feel like they have to have kids ….YOU DON’T! I have never had any motherly instincts , and don’t really like kids, so thought it’d be best not to have them. Life is good.

[@teeayyyyyy]

I got fixed at 28, married at 31, been loving it! We have a house, get to go on vacation, can just chill after work. It’s lovely. My husband and I couldn’t be happier doing our own thing, so I am soooooo happy your life has turned out so great! Congratulations on 33 years! YALL are the goals!!!

[@tammieschaffer4818]

I’m 56, been married 36 years, have 1 kids & respect the hell out of you 💗!!

[@tammieschaffer4818]

@@teeayyyyyyYou, too!! 💗

[@JessDEdwards]

Same here! Married 15 years, no kids. Kids seem like literal prison to me. No judgement for those who have them, there are some great parents out there. But me?? No. I'd be worried 24/7 and also I'd miss my quiet time to do whatever the fuck I wanted any day of the week!

[@molly4561]

Thank you so much for this comment!! I’ve never wanted kids but my whole life everyone has said thing like “you’re gonna regret that…you’re gonna change your mind” I know me better than anyone and i definitely don’t want to be a parent, unless it’s a cat😆

[@nickisekhar1721]

finally. we are discussing the ramifications of rock hard butter.

[@JessDEdwards]

That step mom sounds like she's one picnic away from giving the poor girl antifreeze in the gatorade. Scary af.

[@lauratomczak6797]

This is the podcast I never knew I needed

[@lisa408t]

To the lady who wants her fiance to GET RID of his daughter..... YOU ARE IN FACT A BAD PERSON!!!!

[@Zorbakozak]

I have given up on dating. The two longest relationships I’ve had since my husband passed away , both men were extremely jealous of my children. Plus they acted like everything I owned was meant to be for them and to exclude my children. I have nothing to do with these people ever again.

[@dautry69]

I am down to the ground with u regarding the cold butter thing in restaurants. I work in a restaurant, and let me just tell you the restaurants want to serve their butter nice and spreadable, too. Unfortunately, the health departments insist that you keep dairy products at a “safe” temperature (40F or lower) until you use it and there’s almost no way to comply with the law and also serve the butter in any temperature other than rockhard. If you get caught with room temp butter during a health inspection, you will be fined heavily. I’ve HAD it.

[@KarlBean-pb9zf]

Me too! The Health Dept. is mistaken. I keep my butter at room temperature for days and days and it has never turned rancid or spoiled.I hate cold butter on my hot toast or bagel.

[@melindahall5062]

They’re not “mistaken”. Their rules come from unending studies over a hundred years. I hate cold butter too but I’d rather my butter be safe. We leave our butter at home out with a cover most of the time except for Summer in Tucson.

[@edwardgose7234]

I'm a 77 year old man in Michigan love your show

[@andrewmurray1478]

This podcast is EVERYTHING and never fails to make me laugh and improve my days 😂❤

[@kconway2263]

Jennifer speaks the truth. If you have no life outside of your kids and work, it’s hard to figure out who you are when your kids are 18, and you have to try to set better boundaries at work for your health and sanity.

[@belindaruiz7]

I am 46 years old and don’t have any kids. I was born to be the fun aunt at the party. I knew I never wanted to have the responsibility that comes with having children. Don’t get me wrong I adore my nieces and nephews and they are all my beneficiaries equally on my life insurance and bank accounts but I’m glad when the day is over I can take them back to their parents and I get to continue my life. I think I excel as an aunt but I would’ve probably been a not so excellent parent. I think it’s admirable when women can stand in their truth and say nothing is wrong with me I just don’t want kids! So kudos to us!

[@Ryan-id5xt]

My very glamorous Greek grandmother was constantly in a cloud of smoke, she quit when they banned smoking on planes. Her response "what's the point?"

[@djack915]

😂a plane that put tremendous pollution in the air lol

[@Ryan-id5xt]

@@djack915 whats that got to do with the price of eggs?

[@montessorifrankfort2594]

Michael Cohen just said on Patreon you ladies are his favorite Podcast!!!!!!

[@melindahall5062]

That’s so great!

[@fishdude666ify]

"You know what really grinds my gears? The Amish; they're called cars, people. They're much faster than horses!" -Peter Griffin

[@garrettflores5827]

“To get the Clap, at your advanced age” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@amithorpe]

that mom to be is not only toxic, she's a danger and I hope, beyond hope, that the dad finds out how she really feels about his daughter.

[@debbrueggemann3762]

I will be 70 next year. Never had children. NEVER wanted them, don’t miss the fact that I didn’t have any. No need to feel sorry for me, or to envy me. We all make our own choices and it’s good not to have regrets.

[@Swissmiss8899]

What a beautifully self-assured woman you seem to be. I’m so happy you’ve lived a full and happy life for YOURSELF! It is inspiring.

[@timotheusvanesch3959]

Wauw, that Reddit-one hit home! My mother died when I was just 5. My dad was lost, completely lost. My stephmother came in and "saved his sorry ass". Within 6 months she was pregnant, 1 year later once more. And I've basically had a youth of psychological warfare. Left home when I was 16 (after she told me: "Either you go, or I go", knowing full well she was in the position of power) Have been fighting my life ever since. Didn't do bad, but had to do it all alone. It hurts to see my siblings having had all the care, all the education, all the support they needed. And I just saw my dad once every 5 years... He never stopped blaming me for leaving. This story is a disaster waiting to happen.

[@dmm1863]

It was the same story with my aunt who was raised in a very small town in the Midwest. She was an only child whose mother died when she was 5. Dad meets another woman who did not want this little girl so, Dad gives little girl to her maternal grandmother to raise. Dad marries this woman and has many children. While growing up my aunt ran into her dad often while out in public. He either ran in the opposite direction or headed into the nearest bar to avoid her. Needless to say, my aunt (who at 93 and still alive) lived an amazing life. She worked for the FBI in DC and later headed up disaster relief for the Red Cross in the Midwest. Bottom line, you did nothing wrong. Your family is screwed up. Find good people to align yourself with and live your own BEST life. It certainly sounds like you are heading in that direction.

[@ambriaashley3383]

I am so very sorry. You did not that deserve that abuse. You are such an incredibly strong & valuable person. I hope that you have found a chosen family & all the peace & love you so greatly deserve ❤

[@ambriaashley3383]

@@dmm1863my heart breaks for the young child your aunt was. How can a parent do that to their own child?? How can the child be more mature than they are? Well, your aunt is certainly amazing & inspirational as well. Please hug her for me ❤

[@AzhidaReminiec9999]

​@@dmm1863 My mother told me to go peddle my ass ..because I told her that I'm starting a band ..I can't work ( health problems)

[@timotheusvanesch3959]

@@ambriaashley3383 Thank you so much! Support is hard to find, sometimes. Especially when hard times hit -again-. 💝💖

[@Querkopp3]

My favorite ladies on the Internet crack into the real tough stuff again, Love it 💕

[@Lalaundercover389]

I can’t believe I’ve been watching you guys grow for this long,the level of comfort and confidence from you two is palpable

[@guillermorojas1532]

Imagine MEXICAN AMISH riding on an ESCALADE in Mexico City. WILD. I was dumbfounded.

[@TM-jx8he]

Amish on planes: are you sure they aren’t Mennonites?

[@shannoncrismon5208]

Exactly what I was thinking. Those are definitely Mennonites

[@lorassorkin]

That's what I came here to ask as well. There are several Mennonite communities in the central part of the country and they are not nearly as restrictive as the Amish.

[@kelb6073]

There is an Amish community in Florida. They go there for vacation.

[@austinrider121]

Same difference. Mennonites are just diet Amish.

[@merc3375]

@@kelb6073by horse and buggy, amiright?

[@jamesnorrs9590]

Finally someone taking the Amish to task! I bet those Amish pickleball players had Stanley cups.

[@thatbradyguy]

😂😂😂😂

[@hirtisrandolph4843]

There's a deeply dark underbelly to the Amish far beyond the isolationism, abuse, grooming and member coercion.

[@danatilton3131]

I feel so bad for those women.

[@livvie93]

I'd also like to add that, generally, they are not good to dogs and see them as a quick buck. I don't know what they've done to my Australian Shepherd girl but she is scared of everything and despises men. I can only assume one of her abusers in the "breeder's" house was male and she's been scarred ever since. I know of plenty stories like that. One would assume since they are so religious, they would respect animals as well since they're also God's creatures.

[@erincormany6688]

They're horrible and abusive to there animals too. Horses and dogs especially.

[@kelb6073]

There are some crazy stories about Amish people on Reddit. They aren't great neighbors...a lot of drama.

[@Tantejuju65]

Mennonites do have options not open Amish.

[@darrensimpson4160]

Just Discovered you Channel & “You Ladies Are Clever GENIUSES to Watch” …I’m Now A Permanent Subscriber 😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@randibgood]

That stepmother is absolutely doing a disservice to her baby daddy, his daughter, his family, the son she is having, and to herself. She is setting them all up for a miserable life and a helluva lot of drama and turmoil. Selfish beyond belief.

[@kdholden]

Why am I SO FIRED UP about this bread and butter situation 😂😅😂. I've HAD IT with that!!!

[@cindywho134]

As someone who lives in Lancaster County PA (home to one of the largest Amish communities in the US), I have to agree with what you said but it's a love/hate kind of thing because they bring in lots of tourists who spend lots of money. While they might not have modern conveniences in their homes, they avail themselves of lots of modern technology through other means. For what it's worth, volleyball is a big deal among Lancaster County Amish. The play in bare feet. There's nothing like an Amish volleyball tournament. Love you ladies!

[@jaygatz4335]

I presume the women won't be wearing bikinis if they play on the beach . . .

[@cindywho134]

​@@jaygatz4335😂😂😂 Both the men and women wear the usual Amish clothing. It's co-ed and they have skills.

[@Swissmiss8899]

No good words should ever be spoken about such an abusive demographic of people that the Amish are. They systemically abuse animals, children, and women, all in the name of religion.

[@hirtisrandolph4843]

Being invited to church groups as a new mom may be a nice gesture at first glance, and even be completely innocuous from the person offering, but it is 100% a trap. There will never be a clean break-away or the odds of a no-strings attached friendship forming a slim to none. It's a set-up with the ultimate pitfall that you and your baby will form attachments to people in these groups while in a challenging and vulnerable state. You look to those other members going through the same crucible as you for advice and for sympathy and when they ask "you wanna stay for service?" Or " some of us girls do a mommy's Bible study, would you like to join us?", you feel pressured to say yes. Then you'll always feel guilty into staying or that by exiting the church and those groups, you'll be devasting you or your child's sense of community. It's bullshit and I've had it.

[@hirtisrandolph4843]

I've also had it with KZbin having a mental breakdown whenever a comment textbox is open for longer than a minute. I'm doing laundry for fucks sake, let me type when I'm ready!

[@hirtisrandolph4843]

Also, why do I worry. Jen's always ready with the same take as me.

[@Swissmiss8899]

You’re so right. It seems like the vast majority of religious people these days are extremely disingenuous and self righteous. They “pray for you” only to seem good in the eyes of their god.

[@jamieeaton1605]

That Reddit mom post is the beginning of a dateline special.

[@noraxbeth]

That pregnant girl is in for it…. all kids are annoying. Her kid will be too. They will grow out of it. That being said, she should have said that she had those concerns before committing marriage and a baby to this man. What an awful person… the little girl doesn’t deserve all that scheming by adults.

[@sharonklauser9359]

my brother and I have a competition every week to see which of us have the most terrible kids... It is so much fun he calls me every week and it's the best therapy I've ever had. We just laugh our asses off, by the way our kids are like Pump's age. So do the math. We're old, it never gets better.

[@jeniferhood4141]

Hard butter tears even the warmest bread.

[@SouthEndDoom]

I'd like to request you have Hal Sparks on as a guest. I just think the hilarity that would ensue could be beneficial to all involved. Excelsior!

[@randibgood]

I second this idea!!! Love me some Sparks!!!

[@wanderlustendumado5396]

The motherhood (especially the first few months) is so true. Everyone acts like it's all rainbows and sunshine. It's not. I love my tween son, but you don't forget those first few months.

[@elaineisabelle427]

I remember being able to smoke on the plane when my girlfriends and I would fly to Florida for spring break. It was great.

[@avinashreji60]

Ew

[@cindytermuende7597]

I’m single never married no kids. 53. Happyyyyyy

[@catren1825]

JFC! That person has no business step-mothering that poor little girl. She’s never known her mother, I don’t know how to hear that and not want to scoop her up and mother her myself. It is sociopathic to feel that strongly that she wrote that shit down, and then shared it! Tragically sad for the little girl and her dad…I hope he figures it out before this lunatic has a chance to cause more trauma. And BTW: (similar to those who have to announce they’re wealthy or smart to convince people)…if you have to tell people that you’re “not a bad person”, odds are the opposite is true.

[@Kike_mv]

Yesssss!!!! Im so happy that Jackie is back

[@sarahbleckman5199]

Thank you for bringing up the Amish issue. 10 years ago I was in Canada and what do I see but a bunch of Amish getting off a tour bus. Wtf? I also recently saw a woman in a dress and bonet at a restaurant with her husband and she was using a smart phone.

[@bananaempijama]

When I heard they were moderates, I thought "Jessica" would go ballistic 😂

[@Atom63-f3y]

Would NEVER fly again..most disgusting and destructive habit in the world🤮…and I smoked for several years🥺

[@cynthiaben6894]

They're always on the Amtrak too. They ride the train and use cell phones as well. Every time I ride the train there's always a family and some on there.

[@elizabethblack1577]

I just finished watching you lovely, intelligent, and spicy ladies on Mea Culpa & I am BEYOND thankful for discovering you & your podcast! I live in Rogers Co., Oklahoma & it was immensely refreshing and uplifting to hear liberal women speaking actual truth and sanity from our state. I subscribed to your channel today & will be following you, along with the Meidas Touch Network. ♥♥

[@LEM19284]

Even if she doesn’t tell the guy her deep dark demented ways, I pray he found her out before marrying her!

[@derek7062]

Hi Jen and Pumps! What time does the “Meet and Greet” start tomorrow? I am so excited to meet you both! 😊

[@davidbauer4355]

Visited an Amish community with a guide back in the '90's. The guide said they were not allowed to have tech in their homes, but could use things like calculators run on batteries in their shops and some could use electricity in their barns for milkers and such. You also could see booths that looked like outhouses, particularly in front of things like cabin rentals which were actually phone booths. There were wired phones in the booths and someone would spend the day at the booth to answer calls for reservations and whatnot. Not sure how things are with the dominance of the Internet these days. They did a lot of sewing in the summer and then a lot of baking in the winter for the extra heat in the house and sold the extra with tourist shops.

[@deepea2867]

I ❤u, Jessica! So smooth, didn't bother correcting him lol

[@JENNIFERBOO]

Sassy spray, that’s Genius! 😂😂😂❤❤❤❤

[@thatbradyguy]

"Bread skidder" 😂😂😂

[@llliden7724]

I live in Amish country. They hire regular people to haul them around. They go to Walmart here. They have rode the greyhound bus forever. I used to work at the local post office and sell postage process Amish parcels to send. They have a phone booth that they all share out in the country somewhere.

[@antoniokinsey4041]

The Cheesecake Factory serves great waffles with cold, rock hard butter, AND, even worse, freezing maple syrup!!!!

[@juliagray1276]

Another Amish fun fact: I live in Illinois, and whenever there is a piece of legislation introduced regarding policing midwives, the Amish invade the Capitol in Springfield--their carriages are everywhere, and they protest inside the building. It's a wild sight.

[@edwardlulofs444]

Yep! Tell it ladies. 😊

[@AARONANCE]

13:54 I refuse to ply the hosts with fake insults just to be featured on rhe show 😂

[@dylanb5654]

Memaw's rap name, 'Bumps'

[@jojohisgrove3218]

You mean Bumps in pumps? Lol

[@llliden7724]

When there was garage sales in the small Ohio village that I worked in, they would actually hook a trailer on the back of their buggy and go garage sale shopping in the village

[@TeachArt240]

Amish don't use technology at home, but they work in other people's homes & in factories where they use technology. We hired an Amish man to do work for us. One of his sons (he had about 10 kids) was severely injured in an accident. He spent 3 months in a hospital using technology to recover. We had to pay his driver to drive him, plus hours for the driver to sit in our driveway in his car doing nothing. One day, his driver left to take care of personal stuff. One of the Amish guy's tools broke, so I drove him & 2 sons to replace it. He saw a store he thought might have one. When he and his sons were getting out of the car, he said, "This would make a good joke. Three Amish men walk into an auto parts store..." We eventually had to fire him because paying for his driver who did nothing for us was outrageous.

[@aaronlocke1469]

Yall should try to do a collab with more Drag performers!

[@kahlodiego5299]

That woman sounds like my fathers second wife. He went along with it. No one in their lives knew about me and my sister (including their son.)

[@cindytermuende7597]

47:03 make a drink cup that says Sassy Sips. I would buy it

[@ericasnyder5109]

Sassy spray, Pumps is a legend 🫶🏽

[@sandralamphier9433]

It is not YOUR right to affect the quality of MY air! You can smoke whatever/whenever you want but NOT when I have to breathe it! Not in a restaurant, not in a tin can! I’VE HAD IT! 😬🤯🤬

[@connorc6596]

Yea, you want to talk about stupidity? Someone who doesn’t even smoke romanticize others breathing in second-hand smoke. One of the few things unequivocally and scientifically proven to be linked to major diseases. No thanks. 🤮

[@rebo2610]

I take the warm bread and set it on top of the butter dish, then drape the cloth over that. Wait five minutes while I suck down my cocktail and order another one. Then the top of the butter is soft enough to scrape off and spread. Patience, grasshopper! But still, I agree we should be served room temp butter.

[@jeffreyneal5625]

Quakers dress just like the Amish, but they LOVE technology, including Escalades!

[@meglynley]

Last Thanksgiving I told my family (in casual conversation) that I don't think I want kids and that I've never really imagined that for myself. I'm 26, from southeast Missouri, and was over at my uncle's house who is a die hard Trumper and Fox News addict. I, luckily, have parents who were never closed minded, believe in science, and have always supported me as I have not followed the traditional path. My uncle repeatedly said things like "children are what bring happiness into life" and "I didn't know what happiness was before children" and "That makes me sad for you". From my experience, many people that live to have children, never took the time to love themselves and find passion in the many other options this world has to give. I think these people secretly wish they never would've had kids (or had them so young) and want everyone else to be as stuck and miserable as them. There is no correct way to live this life. I'm so fortunate to live in a time where I can think freely and choose not to follow a path that wasn't meant for me

[@LEM19284]

My brother is a Certified Bernina Technician. Bernina is a very high end computerized sewing machine. They cost thousands of dollars. Anyway, my brother sees the Amish men and women all up and through every convention and all of hotels. He says he guesses they light lanterns in their room and take the stairs. UNTIL he captured some Amish couples on the escalator. It’s a scam. End of story.

[@kjmav10135]

I was not aware that Bernina produced a high-tech treadle machine! 😂😂😂😂

[@DesigNatedAudio]

20+ years restaurant experience 🙋🏼‍♂️ Establishments with rock hard butter have a lazy staff who isn’t prepping butter ramekins prior to a dinner shift. OR, prepped & refrigerated butter ramekins are not pulled out of the fridge prior to a shift with the intent of softening before being served. There’s an easy solution. The staff and/or management are lazy and disconnected from the nuances of their customer’s experience.

[@lovethat4u]

I’ve gone to Paris twice by myself? Do I get a participation award?

[@denisedriscoll2193]

I agree with TM-jx8he - probably not Amish and more likely Mennonites. I made that mistake when I lived in Colorado. A van full of 'Amish' pulled up, much to my surprise. They turned out to be Mennonite.

[@ireallydontlikeemail]

Oh my god, that poor little girl. She's already lost her mother, now there is an care giver who is actively plotting to ruin her life. It can happen too. This woman can completely ruin the life of this little girl.

[@tobipradasri4089]

Like the great Chelsea Handler said “ KIDS? They’re not that great”!!! The best decision I’ve ever made was not to having kids😂

[@ashebarley77385]

hahahaha Great reviews!!!! Lesbian all the way WHOOP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oldies but damn goodies!!!!!!!! I fucking love you 2!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep this shit up

[@BeegirlsHoneyHouse]

Lume Tangerine is Amazing‼️🍊

[@mikescott6026]

I'm dying for Meemaw's Sassy Spray 😂

[@skybaby444]

Recently reports have surfaced about incest among the Amish kids.

[@UsernamesForDummies]

What a great guest! I don’t know who she is, but I’d create a mother/baby group just with her. No one else allowed (and we would drag every other mother/baby in town - especially the babies)

[@brendaellis7949]

Check out the Brethern religion. In rural VA, they dress like the Amish, but do not have the rules against education, technology, etc. You could be mixing up the two religions.

[@JessDEdwards]

I'd rather have country crock that's spreadable than cold ass clumpy butter for fuck sake

[@michaeljones9674]

Responsibility not your call just your Responsibility 😊😊😊

[@kyleh3895]

The “Amish” seen at the airport were more likely Mennonite. Can be easily confused by the type of dress.

[@mattcrawford713]

“I bet the Amish try to pre-board” ⚰️

[@mollybloom5681]

"You scared the SHIT OUT OF ME" Jacky, Jacky, Jacky....do I really need to point it out? You literally said it yourself without realizing why you can poop effortlessly. I believe a thanx to Pumps is in order.

[@lindacanham1835]

This was such a great show. I love you all so much!

[@tammygarrett9261]

15 seconds in the microwave softens butter perfect, if tiny cubes 10 seconds.

[@paulapiwowarczyk4877]

Oh god, I’m the kid with dead mom and this kinda step mom … this made me nauseous in a nostalgic way

[@KonwTheTrut]

Nurse Kylie hahahahahaha omfg

[@denisegilkeson695]

I smoked on planes ✈️ back in the day. I quit years ago!

[@margaretfrothingham9127]

The Amish don't actually make those cinnamon rolls. If they did it would be with the lowest quality (cheapest) ingredients like off brand Dollar Store hydrogenated oil. They buy frozen food from the same food service companies that the crappy chain restaurants use.

[@nynatv1951]

I lived in Philly and they have stores with electricity, and also in Lancaster they have restaurants all over the place..!

[@Peacefire99]

We don't get to eat at Chick-fil-A and turn around and ban Amish cinnamon rolls Jennifer...

[@cdhotwing]

Perfect!

[@grayciereppart4091]

Pumps, I found this podcast during my pregnancy after the whole spoon up your ass debacle. You convinced me I would be fighting for my life after having my baby, and I regret to inform you it slid right out. Best poop ever. Love you xoxo.

[@vrflips]

You can say anything you want about the AMish...not like they're gonna see this HAHAHA

[@bourdeaun]

love love Jacquie :)

[@MistletoeGames]

The Amish know how to make some good butter though! Room tempt because of the lack of fridges too!

[@Ganymedia9]

The faceless dolls are because having faces is supposed to support vanity somehow. So faceless dolls endorse humility... I guess.

[@bml559]

I love Jackie schimmel

[@youthblender]

the Amish cannot operate cars or buy tickets for themselves. their lifestyle rules allows for them to get rides from non-Amish and some people drive Amish as a full-time job, have people help them book travel, etc. The way they use lawyers (usually only for real estate matters. buying or selling farms, when companies want to buy their land for development, etc) is to either meet in person or they will send their lawyer a handwritten letter. they will not even use the phone to communicate.

[@phoenixinertia]

After seeing this episode, I'm surprised the 4B Movement has not been mentioned yet.

[@thriftin_kristin2180]

Not the Amish taking an L today 😂🤣😂🤣 no one is safe haha

[@shannonc.8911]

I’m clearly not 5 years old, but if I didn’t know any better, I would have swore that letter about the 5 year old was actually from my step-monster. Call CPS on that person.

[@sandralamphier9433]

I didn’t have that experience but am sorry you clearly did 🙁😢. I totally agree, however, that woman should never be a step to any child. Probably shouldn’t be a mom to her own child either 🙄🤢