Budget Breakdown (Ep. 9) Single Mom Escaping A Toxic Partner | FrugalFitMom Podcast

[@rachelstephens8716]

Hey there, mortgage underwriter here. Can you let her know there is an option called Release of Co-Mortgagor in which she requalifies for the payment on her own and releases him from the note. She gets to keep her interest rate and the payment and term remains the same. Tell her to ask her lender about it.

[@arthrodea]

For this option, does she need to buy him out (come up with additional money or take out a loan to pay him his half of the equity in the house)?

[@ms_firefly]

​@@arthrodeaYes, that would be an important detail!

[@kidandcollie4916]

I would keep the pet. If the daughters are super invested in the pet it is going to be really difficult for them to give it up. Cut down expenses in other areas. Also, right now it is really difficult to rehome a pet. I have a lovely dog that I adopted from a difficult situation but she doesn't get along with my other dogs. I have contacted 30 rescue groups and none of them will take her, they are all full. Also if you need help with vet care and food there are a lot of groups that will help you with that.

[@dianasimplifies]

Exactly, every time someone has dropped a dog off here no rescue will help us. If we are lucky we can eventually find it a home, I have a house full of cats and a dog that hates other dogs and is aggressive, I cant have another dog. Totally agree with you, getting rid of the dog will be traumatic for everyone. It’s like a death. Clearly they don’t understand this. Sad for them but anyway.

[@CookingwithCatLover0330]

I have learned how to use a dime size of shampoo, 4 or 5 squares of TP, a small amount of toothpaste on my toothbrush. You can cut the toiletries down a lot. Get the family on board. Great video. I will be praying for this family. If she's reading the comments, you can do this, young lady! Keep yourself and the kids safe.

[@Gooby12]

Toilet paper does go on sale at Safeway and I stock up. Safeway app needed to clip the coupon and when you purchase items you collect points. Save enough points and you can even get free tp. I compare unit prices and length of tp and get best bang for the buck too.

[@justplaintara9028]

If her employer offers such excellent benefits, they may offer some legal support options. My first employer offered various social services which turned out to be a great resource to find out what my options were for divorce involving children. They were familiar with what services were available to me.

[@laurahelder2331]

I'd love to hear follow ups on these stories for future episodes!

[@malloreygarrett892]

I’m laughing so hard that y’all have never heard the term fur baby I’ve called my dog that for my whole life 🤣

[@terrip8451]

I bought a 2003 Honda Civic from my sister in law for $2000. No payments, basic insurance. This little car runs sooooooooo well. We only do basic service to it, and because my husband works 3 blocks away, he rides his bike and I use the car on weekends. We only fill up once a month. Don't be afraid to buy an older car.

[@bubblesbubbly8525]

Truth! I drive a 2001 Toyota Camry which I've had for about 7 years. Those two models are cut from the same (virtually indestructible) cloth, I'm convinced!

[@jillgott6567]

I was blessed with a 2009 car in 2017/2018 it is now 2023 and I still ♥ my car !

[@dianasimplifies]

I have 2 older cars. All well over 250,000 miles. One Buick and one FORD….sorry Christine but used Fords are fine at least the trucks are. Hubby has a 2011 Ford truck and I have a 2003 Ford truck. 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[@lauranewman564]

Love this!

[@laurenyost1526]

Totally agree! Our cars are 2004 and 2007. They're still running perfectly well with 200,000+ miles on them!

[@clusterbungle]

I find these budget breakdowns really fascinating and you guys gave some great advice for a really tough situation here. I do absolutely agree with you on the pet in this instance, she needs to prioritise herself and her children getting to a safe home, and of course paying off the debt. That said, I would push back a bit on what felt like a slightly flippant attitude and say that in some circumstances pets can be a lifeline. I'm disabled and live by myself, I'm not in debt but do have a low income. I absolutely consider my pet cat a priority as she's my only companion at home and has provided invaluable comfort during prolonged periods of depression. If I was ever in the situation that I couldn't afford the pet food/vet bills etc in order to keep her healthy and happy then I would of course make the difficult decision to give her up, but for my own mental health I would look into every other sacrifice reasonably possible to avoid that situation.

[@jacquelinek5036]

This is going to be hard for her. She doesn't want to disrupt her kids lives a lot because they've already dealt with so much instability. She doesn't want to badmouth their dad. She wants to make sure they're protected by an emergency fund and she doesn't want them to worry. I believe that being AGE APPROPRIATELY open with your kids will make this easier on all three of you. Use your next couple of therapy sessions to work out how to have that conversation. They'll do fine. They have an excellent role model for a mom.

[@roxannewhite9554]

As a Californian who travels often throughout California, you aren’t out of line at all with cutting the grocery budget. Even our Walmarts now carry specialty ingredients for special diets/allergies. Love your cutthroat ideas in a crisis.

[@carnivore_princess]

My heart hurts for the woman you're helping. Praying her and her children find security and healing 🙏🏻

[@judytieger8976]

I was in a similar situation in the Bay Area in California with 3 children. This was a few years back, and I got the house because my ex owed me money and I got a second mortgage and paid him off for his quit claim. It was not easy, but I worked a day job with excellent benefits and worked menial jobs on weekends. It was not easy or ideal but it worked. I am not religious, but I had so much help from friends and for circumstances that made me feel someone was looking out for us. My children worked babysitting for my daughter and fast food restaurants for my sons. I took the bus to work to save money on gas and wear and tear on my paid off Japanese older car. If you are struggling with money you don't owe your kids a college education. My children worked their way through college, which is easier in California. I am frugal , that is why I watch you, so I went bare bones and we made it. I am happily retired now and still living frugally but not from necessity. Still driving older cars of Japanese reliability.

[@korriefisher4545]

The place that I did therapy had students and would only charge $20/session. To be clear, these are people in their last year before practicing independently. Internet for us was a must when our kids were in high school because all their work had to be done on chrome books. We are rural living, didn’t have cable/satellite TV or subscriptions at that time either.

[@ashleyjean172]

I don’t think y’all understand how expensive Santa Barbara county and San Luis Obispo county are. Grocery bill is outrages because prices are outrageous

[@poisonlady1965]

I will slash down to zero for myself but not my furbabies. I spend about 30 per month on the.. People who don’t have pets just don’t understand that you love them from beginning to end or don’t be a pet owner. It’s actually traumatic to animals.

[@dianasimplifies]

Also traumatic to the children!!! Ugh!!!

[@lg127411]

For what it’s worth……college isn’t always the best answer……my spouse did not graduate hs-went into military for 4 years, obtained GED. Never attended college & makes more than double all his friends with degrees (works construction) The trades are where it’s at!!! Often you can get grants or scholarships & be in the workforce within a year.

[@cynthiamantzouranis7134]

Good good advice. Joining a church family could be a wonderful support.

[@amyaguilar1617]

It would be nice to see a budget on a lower income. I can't imagine living on $5400 a month. My monthly income is $2700 and I'm a single mom also.

[@lynnkavanagh7361]

For the toilet paper etc, is she also including specialty hair products like gel, hair spray, etc, and possibly hair cuts & style, manicures.I can see how it would add up to $300 if those items were in there too. I mean we’re talking about 2 teenage girls. Another comment I have is there have to be shelters in California for women in bad situations. She could put her furniture, & anything that needs to be stored in a storage unit. She & the girls could stay at a shelter for perhaps 3-4 months & with not having a lot of the bills that come with being a home owner, she could save the $5,000 much faster. And they would be in a safe place. I can tell you about one of my sisters experiences. She & her ex were divorced & he had specific times to have their boys. During the weekend that was hers, she went away for a weekend with friends. Her kids stayed with a trusted friend. I don’t recall why but her ex wanted to see the boys & found out she was gone. He came storming over to our house pounding on the door demanding to know where they were. My sons’s were home by themselves & were old enough to do so. He scared them so much they went out the back door & hopped a fence & went & stayed with a neighbor until my husband or I got home. I have serious reservations about her & the girls staying in the home they shared. You never know how badly someone will act when they perceive that their home or children are being taken away from them. They really need to get as far away from him as possible. It might be a good idea to get a restraining order on the ex. I wish much luck & will keep her in my prayers.

[@juliedavidson5596]

I can see how much you care about this Mom and her girls in such a difficult situation. Great options and solutions for her. I will pray for her and her girls.

[@NOVAFrugalFamily]

The biggest problem of selling a house if in it with someone else is when they don't want to sell. I knew someone that had to move out and let it go to foreclosure because the other person didn't want to sell. It was a hard move to make but it was the only way that she could get free of the property and him. I think that safety is the biggest issue and it is much safer to move anywhere that the significant other can't find them but it might be hard to go across state lines if those are his children even if they aren't married.

[@letschatfamilyfinances]

$2,000 per month for solar panels?!?! My mind is blown! People sign up for that??? Ok, aside from that shocker… I wish this woman the best and know that she can rework her finances for major peace of mind by following their advice and researching her options with the house ASAP.

[@twilamurphy2944]

Did she finance the solar panels?

[@lg127411]

Sadly in California it’s a rule/regulation that new housing IS REQUIRED to put solar panels on in certain areas. Thanks to mismanagement of the state for decades & their push to get rid of things that are gas powered(including vehicles in the future) the power grid can not support the demand for electricity-so they force new homeowners to help carry this burden. Also for the 14yr old, we have many neighboring states that offer amazing programs for college at a drastically lower rate than California & they recognize CA residents as “locals” so no out of state tuition. For savings on toiletries/personal care/household items, there are some great content creators on both YT, clock app & IG/FB that are huge couponers. Search Savings with Peggy, torokcouponhunter & others. Also for CA internet is practically required for HS & Jr High students. Classes & homework are only allowed on chrome books & many districts have a no paper policy 😢 I’m a mom of 3 high schoolers & it’s been heck! Some school districts offer free hotspots for kids, but typically they don’t work well.

[@greenlantern1986]

Cannot imagine asking for help looking over my budget numbers and being told I should move my family to a new state and find a new job.

[@kaseymontague7755]

Braces are a luxury 🤷 Also, I drive a 2006 Honda Accord. I just took it in to check for maintenance and it got "a good to go" from a mechanic that specializes in Asian vehicles. I originally took it in because I was told it needed a $2000 repair from a Honda dealership, and the the second opinion was adamant that it needed no repairs whatsoever. They didn't even charge me the full diagnostic fee. As much as I'd love a newer vehicle, my car is paid off, reliable, and has many, many miles to go(it only has 113,450 miles on it). Hondas are wonderful-- but theres no reason to have a brand new one.

[@JenniferGee-t4k]

Thank you for helping this person! You guys are such a good team and such an amazing virtual family. I'm single and I live off the grid in a remote, isolated place, get snowed in during the winter, etc. You saved me during the thick of the pandemic period (at least when I had internet!). You are dioing an amazing job taking care of us! Just subscribed.

[@leahrobinson3025]

I am the youngest of 4 children and there was no college fund for me, my parents told me to go to a trade school and basically that I’m on my own. I got a full ride to the trade school and a few years later paid my way through community college to get an associates degree. I was a writing tutor that awarded me a free class each semester and I got scholarships and worked to pay for it. It’s possible and there are options!

[@maryinmichigan2626]

a fourteen and twelve year old can contribute by babysitting or mowing lawns, weeding gardens, tutoring, moms helper, etc. and help buy their own needed toiletries. going to a dollar store to buy shampoo, deodorant etc can save as well.thrift stores and resale shops have great clothing selections as well as books or dvds and music… buy cheap or used and save the difference! our three kids worked 2-3 jobs starting at the same ages and paid for their books and gas and had to either pack a lunch or snack or blow their hard earned money on junk food or fast food. their choice. today so many think nothing of going to starbucks and spending g a fortune on a drink that they can make at home way cheaper. it all adds up!

[@vickidiodato9834]

Please suggest she attend an Al-Anon meeting. They are like "free" therapy. The support system is there.

[@esthers9140]

Great video! I'm one of those that has two "fur babies"😄🐕🐕❤ When my 2 kids were in elementary school our Back Fence was up against the schoolyard. Every day after school I would see their backpacks fly over the fence and they followed yelling, " I get the front bathroom, I get the front bathroom", they did not like taking care of business at school LOL. My son lives near me and there has been a few times where he's swung by just to use my bathroom because he can't stand public restrooms. For those in California, I don't know about other places.. we had solar put on our house through a company called Grid Alternatives. We heard about them on a major News Channel so we knew they were legit. We live in a zip code that is on the lower end economically and because our income was low due to my husband having sustained a work injury, we were able to get our solar for free. Both of my children went to Community College. Both of them got certification in specific fields and they both have really good jobs.

[@grandmasewhappyhomestead187]

I have family that live in california have lived there over thirty years some 50 yrs. Right now I have a family member that is renting a bedroom out in California for 1,000 a month. If she could get the house and rent out a bedroom she could pay that eleven thousand dollars off less than a year. Also know of 2 families both became single mom's with kids and were able to get out of their toxic relationships and they live in california. Both these women is that I know Have amazing jobs available to eventually get homes again and their lives are good and the kids are doing great.

[@gailkapusta1342]

kove ti see a budget for a senior ib a limited income.. thank you for all the advice u give. living on $1766 per month.. Also have some credit card debt for when they were more struggles..

[@angelahawkins8069]

On the student loan situation if she works for a public service agency there is definitely public loan forgiveness. I work for a public service agency, and I made income driven payments until I met my allotted payments, and now my loan is forgiven, but I made payments to get there. There is hope, to this young woman, don't give up! Getting out of an unhealthy situation is priority. Dave and Christine gave awesome advise here. Remember you can do this!!

[@tiffanyrobinson332]

You guys are awesome. I can understand why she'd want the "family" advice re: money from you, I relate. Thank you for these videos, they're really helping me learn and develop a way of thinking about money and priorities.

[@servantwarrior880]

As someone who has a brand new car that is sitting at the dealership getting warranty work n it right now I regret getting rid of my 20 year old car at the moment.

[@leticiamartinez7031]

Alot of locations keep their wifi open and free since the Pandemic. I drive by libraries and restaurants, etc with signage stating "Our parking lot is a wifi access point, you're welcome!"

[@Jerica93]

This was a great episode! Absolutely love the candor.

[@Mare00711]

I'm here for all the budget podcasts! I wish I submitted mine already 😂

[@jeannelohr3901]

Excellent advice, I hope she is able to do some hard things now for a brighter future ahead of her and her girls!

[@michellemhughes]

SLO, great pay and great benefits - my guess is she is a correctional officer at the prison there. If she is a correctional officer, she can earn a crap ton of money doing overtime. I have had my Toyota minivan for 18 1/2 years. It’s been a great vehicle.

[@Hugadognow]

Oh my, I am in San Luis Obispo county, and it's not really 'rural'. Finding affordable housing here, especially with a dog, is very difficult.

[@karenrowles9788]

I live in Bakersfield and have business in SLO at least twice a month. I think they are seriously underestimating the cost of living.

[@mommamoore]

Oh Christine... I heard that for college too but in the end my parents did help me a little but I worked my butt off two jobs and went to class a full schedule to pay my way through for 4 years. I personally like the move out of the state idea if it is at all possible. To help with costs and maybe a fresh start away from the toxic relationship.

[@aglez9266]

I really like this current line of work you guys are doing! Love it. Keep it up!! Really enjoyed the video.

[@Juniperberry76]

My only issue with your podcasts is that they don’t come out often enough! I need more! I love all your budget breakdowns even though I am an Aussie, the only thing I have a differing opinion on is cars, after only buying used for decades the last two I have bought brand new (cash) because my husband is not car minded and breaking down gives me high anxiety….it’s just a matter of balance and choice.

[@dianasimplifies]

I think if you have the cash to buy it that's fine. It's people who can't buy it outright but feel like they need brand new and are financing that can run into issues

[@mintgreen292]

My worry with her budget is she has no budget line for eating out, entertainment, clothes, nothing. I don't think that's realistic with teenagers and it's probably where the credit card bill added up. Birthdays, school supplies, Christmas presents, shoes; these are things that are hard to say no to and they create a black hole in the budget because they're not planned for but you say yes anyways. I feel like a sinking fund line item of $50-100/mo for non-essential spending would hold her more accountable for saying yes to these things while staying within a specified limit.

[@sheila3936]

Definitely need some legal advice. Need to consider custody arrangements and if she would even be allowed to relocate to another state, child support, possible restraining orders, if she can force a sale of the house with his name on it if he doesn’t agree (or have him buy it out) and possible timelines. Ensure you have the paperwork for any financial, legal and child related stuff safety stored before even approaching him about any of this. And make sure there’s nothing else in joint names that he could have access to your money or credit.

[@valeried2941]

I feel sorry for them and so glad you are there to assist!

[@shaz5478]

You guys are doing good work. Keep it up!

[@gailkapusta1342]

ha ha love the go to the bathroom at work and school... lol

[@JH-fb9wj]

The whole house thing…you’re really assuming the partner will happily go along with the plan. If their name in on the house and won’t consent…that might make it harder. And moving to another state could be complicated if custody is involved…. It just might be more complicated than expected.

[@carrieprivette3032]

College for the kids: some states are not only cheaper cost of living, but they have better options for in state colleges that are MUCH cheaper. In Florida, Bright Futures Scholars can get up to 100% tuition paid, and then any additional grants/federal scholarships go towards supplies and room/board. Have your student live at home and they're going for next to nothing. Send them to school in a field that will EARN, not for letters behind their name.

[@v_hovila]

I would NEVER forgive if my pet was taken away for me because of money. There's a good chance the pet's food and possibe dog grooming could be lowered by a third.

[@lynnkavanagh7361]

In my opinion, there are 2 main things she should do. #1. Move out of state, (but somewhere the ex has no ties. She really needs to put the safety of her girls & herself first). She can find a state with a lower cost of living, & she will be far away from the ex. #2. Encourage her daughters to put their very best effort in to high school. That way they might get a scholarship. Even a small one would help.

[@gladyschandler6724]

Sometimes you need to move. I moved last year to Austin, Texas from CA that I've lived over 40 years. My mortgage is 1/3 than a dumpy 2 bedroom apt from the 70's (3k). I planned for my retirement in 2018, when I purchased a new house.

[@julielee4331]

Wow. I live in a HCOL area and some studios start at $3000. I hope this mom finds a safe way out of this situation!!

[@cristyrobertson9165]

Your so right that’s not where the focus needs to be. Being safe mentally, financially, and emotionally ASAP is where that focus needs to be. Don’t borrow tomorrows troubles and the bills that go with it till today is covered. When today is secure then you can look at kids collage and travel.

[@aliciaknight7422]

Would love to hear if she has given you any updates. Love watching y’all!

[@sarahlangham635]

I would love to hear follow up stories from people you have done these reviews for to see what changes they have made!🎉

[@familyzoo4412]

I love all of the thought and care you both put into these for people.❤ Those are some wonderful ideas you guys came up with!

[@joycemitchell2092]

I pray this woman found some answers and help with this. She certainly is in a tough spot. Y’all have really good advice. Like always I wish we had follow ups on how people do with your advice.

[@amandam5201]

We have a 2011 Highlander and our mechanic said it’s the most sound vehicle he’s seen in awhile. We take care of it really well and keep up on the maintenance. The only thing we have replaced is the A/C compressor and other associated parts for $4k in the 9 years we’ve had it. My dad says the only time you buy a newer vehicle is when a repair costs more than the cars value at the time. The new Toyota line of vehicles are smaller - my husband didn’t believe me until we saw a newer Highlander on the highway. We always buy the basic model too.

[@dianasimplifies]

We don’t even replace them then. We just keep fixing them. It’s all in what you want to do though. ❤

[@rachelt727]

Love these budget break downs! Please do more! Also love the sayings on Dave’s shirts. 🙂

[@kathynielsen2414]

How much equity is in the house? Love that you talk about the pets....so many people have these huge dogs and live in a hotel.

[@alisonhoyte7608]

Great talk the hard bit about pets xxx you handled it really well, some womens refuges now have pet accommodation now to help people escape toxic situations

[@87Strong]

I’m 36. Trying to get away from a situation like that. I have a 4yo and 14yo. My Mom is dead and father has always been absent. I make similar. I’ve reached out and no programs (private or government) will give me any assistance bc I “make too much.” Is it me? Are you talking about me? 😢 Ty for this post. I will definitely use it. ❤

[@cristinerolfson3361]

Reach out to a good church. Churches are part of the safety net. People WILL help you❤

[@dianasimplifies]

Yeah I can see that you would be told that. I’m so sorry. There are so many programs that people with your income would totally fall thru the cracks. 😢😢😢😢 the ones around here like the food pantry…you usually have to be getting other benefits somewhere in order to sign up.

[@giseleweaver6520]

Wait until you are an empty nester……we love 💕 our fur babies 🥰

[@kathrynlongstaff9282]

As a coeliac I would disagree with cutting the supplements. There might be cheaper ways to do this but after the damage done by gluten I was basically deficient in everything even though I have a great diet (whole foods blah blah). I'm with you on the specialist food bill. Think potatoes and rice if it's gluten not gluten free replacements which are full of weird stuff. I was dairy free too a while whilst healing. Dairy free is harder to feel satiated. Whole foods, freshly cooked, upped protein not too expensive.

[@dianasimplifies]

Agree. I’m not celiac and I can’t cut my supplements. They keep me working!! I guess whatever you have to cut to get out tho.

[@bethchance9913]

Omg.. please adopt her be her parents

[@karindooley]

Former Bakersfield resident here... Locals (all the way inland) shorten San Luis Obispo to SLO, pronounced 'slow'.

[@gladyschandler6724]

I have a 2010 Honda civic purchased under 20k. Current mileage 167,500. Will last beyond 200k.

[@dianasimplifies]

Will last forever. Just keep repairing it. That’s what we do. I drive a 2000 Buick and a 2003 Ford truck.

[@MomNTraining]

🤣 that’s the same basic conversation I had with my parents. “You’re going to college. Oh, but I don’t know how you’re going to pay for it.” To be fair though, they both put themselves through college as an adult when I was little.

[@karinakissell9565]

Wishing this budget write-in luck! You can do it!

[@sherigiffin4515]

I thought you were nice. The goal is to escape. My mom raised me on a (crazy) low income. We didn't have a TV for 10 years b/c we didn't have the money. Keeping streaming seems super nice. Struggling momma...you got this. It will be hard, but you can do this. Keep you and your girls safety is the goal. Keep revisiting the goal. You will be past this valley at some point.

[@heatherj3030]

SLO is a college town minutes from beaches, and the cost of living is extremely high there. I thought $450 was really low for that area for groceries. My boys used to do tutoring there in the summer and we would bring food with us for the week so we didn't have to buy groceries there. We are a couple of hours east of SLO, much cheaper.

[@heatherj3030]

Oh my gosh, I just got to the part where you called SLO a low income area!😂😅 I wish! I'd move there today! Bakersfield, Fresno yes, SLO, not at all. 😁 But, great financial advice. I definitely could benefit from cut out a few things and saving more too. Thanks for helping people!❤

[@FrugalFitMom]

It’s actually not there, that’s just the closest main city. I didn’t want to give away the actual location

[@happymama1015]

I just love you both and your empathy and understanding towards others. I love what a good wife you are too, I’m just terrible with money and we are paying for it at the moment, I always have good intent but my compulsiveness is just terrible. I am hoping to do better🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@lauranewman564]

You can do this temporarily! If you think it's forever that can be depressing. Just make a plan, give yourself a speck of wiggle room, and go for it!

[@dianasimplifies]

@happy mama do you possibly have bipolar disorder? That can cause one to buy a lot of things one does not need. Just a thought not trying to diagnose over the internet. I have several bipolar friends. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@melodychristy448]

I love love love these videos!!! Thank you

[@leticiamartinez7031]

TP for poo, I buy cheap white 4x4 diaper cloths for pee. I keep a smaller hamper under my bathroom sink for the cloths.

[@heatherj3030]

My parents are putting solar on their house and their rental this week in California. I think the payments are around $175 for each of their houses. $2000 a month has to be a typo.

[@dianasimplifies]

Lordy I would hope so. Sounds useless if it’s that much.

[@midnightcoalexpress]

Hahahaha I love how you downed Fords. But I will say I’ve only ever had fords and never had a problem with any of them. My parents and grandparents and uncles have always had fords no issues. I love my fords, my husband is a mechanic and fords are one of the brands he prefers too. Toyota and Honda are his favorite, but he absolutely HATES Chevy. But got a 2014 ford explorer 4 years ago and I love it. Have also had an escape and focus. Loved the escape as well. I always wonder why people give fords a bad rep

[@dianasimplifies]

Same we love our used Ford trucks! Glad to see another Ford owner here 😆😆😆 I used to buy used Maximas but the paint always started coming off. Good cars but not getting another one. Paint seems to stay on the Fords lol

[@lifebeyondthesalary2458]

I love my Toyota & I agree, Chevy sucks. Chrysler is the worst imo…

[@lin90210]

Her income is great. However my American cousin who was the high earner in her relationship split from her exhusband she has to keep paying him monthly. I'm not sure how it works in the UK. Although interest rates are higher, the property prices are high in California...timing is never perfect...but its better than being tied with him. Interest rates could be worse...my Dad says he remembers 20% mortgage rates in the past. I've heard of people moving from Cali to Texas for income tax purposes. But Christina is right the lady needs professional help. We all have advice but it's the lady's choice in the end.

[@tracyroe7235]

Check your mortgage to see if you can assume the mortgage and take the ex off of it. I did this when I got divorced. Also, for TP/toiletries, shop at drug stores. There are tons of KZbin videos/bloggers that post excellent deals and you can drastically reduce this.

[@cookshackcuisinista]

🎉 love all of the info you give! Straight shooters, straight from the heart with caring and compassion!

[@carlagribi6142]

Is quit clain him off the house an option? Sometimes solar are bond grants anf they get paid off at the sale. May chew into her equity divisibley split?

[@gladyschandler6724]

Costco ghee, almond milk, coconut oil

[@christinevoss6993]

Make sure college is for the education not the party. Kids can start their own savings at 16 with a weekend job. I hope your advice helps.

[@lindakelly3164]

I agree with Dave, Sell the house! maybe they will able to keep the pet. I agree with Christine, Move to another state since she doesn't have any family in CA. It is expensive to live in Califonia. Start a new life! Get RID of Toxicity in your life. Fresh start!

[@key6157]

I pay 19.99 per month for internet because I had a pell grant 25 years ago and my internet company is crazy. I get a 30 dollar per month discount and signed up for an additional 20 dollar discount for two years that was offered straight from the provider. Also cars do not turn into pumpkins at 100, 200, or even 300000 miles. I have two cars from 2001 Ford and Mitsubishi, well over 220000 miles on each.

[@dianasimplifies]

Oh good another Ford owner LOL!!! 😆😆😆I have a 2003 Ford F150 over 250,000 miles

[@key6157]

@@dianasimplifies the Ford needs lots of annoying fixes all the time but at least parts are cheap. I bought the thing for 700 bucks with 138000 miles on it in 2012. The Mitsubishi I have owned for 19 years, and it has had the check engine light on for 7 years-a faulty 8 dollar sensor that is within a 500 dollar part that is known to break when disassembled. We just check the code periodically to make sure it's the same thing and carry on. If I have music, functioning windows and doors and functioning heat and ac, that is all I can ask for out of a car that runs and drives. The only times I have been let down by these cars is when a belt broke before it's planned replacement, when my battery ran out of juice, or when I stupidly ran out of gas. Cars need to get you from point A to point B. My mom has gotten into the habit of buying a new car every 4 years. Her 2021 Kia Soul stranded us on the side of the road just outside of Dallas on our way back to Kansas last summer. She had to buy a 2022 Kia k5 to get us back home. No one will convince me that newer is better.

[@dianasimplifies]

@@key6157 wow! Yeah I’m always kind of worried I will be stranded but usually what I see on the side of the road is much newer than mine 😆

[@gladyschandler6724]

You both made sound recommends for this single mom

[@lv2flip24]

thank u for saying it doesnt matter where u go to school. for the majority of people, u just need to get the education somewhere to get that degree. no one is going to judge whether u went to a prestigis or well known school. u just got to find a place to learn what u need to learn for your job. and if you dont know, community college is great til u figure it out and even if you know. classes are the practically the same everywhere for those basics everyone has to take. y not take them for a reasonable rate. and dont forget financial aid. a great help for those who dont make a lot.

[@jillgott6567]

Especially when people are not married they need to keep their money separate, have a job so they are not dependent on their partner and can leave if they ever need to. Also, do not buy , have a lease with someone if you are not married. If, she needs to get an apartment the girls could share a room and she sleep in the living room. There are some scholarships for students who are in state.

[@Saras_place]

Sadly it's not strange not to have family or good friends .. I grew up in the foster care system .. I dont have family or friends..just acquaintances ...

[@melissajohnson7887]

Totally true about the pets. Remember any way you slice it, you will outlive your pets, meaning they will not be with you forever. So if that pet needs to find another home for the remainder of it's life that is the responsible thing to do. I know so many find that harsh but truth and kids are more important in this moment.

[@dianasimplifies]

Pets are a commitment. Please don’t get one if you plan to throw it away. It is not easy finding a really good home.

[@sashimb11]

I love this podcast.

[@roxpar1816]

Is there an update planned for this video? I'm really wondering what this lady is gonna decide and how she and her girls are gonna end up.

[@kristinam2719]

Dave and Christine / where do you buy your used cars from? Do you take them to mechanic for a check up before buying!

[@lexichantel96]

you can buy used cars from dealerships (even big ones like Toyota) or independent sellers. i’d recommend a dealership if you’ve never bought used before just as a transition with a more familiar process. and yes definitely take them to a mechanic for a checkup before buying! Even dealerships can be untrustworthy with used cars. But I’ve bought all of my 4 cars used, from dealerships and 3rd party independent sellers and have had great results every time!

[@kristinam2719]

@@lexichantel96 thank you, Alexa! Believe it or not, I’ve never bought used before, but I do keep my cars for 10 yrs or so.

[@lexichantel96]

@@kristinam2719 good luck! it’s fairly simple and you can get a great deal compared to a new vehicle :)

[@lindacgrace2973]

Uhh...what about getting Mint Mobile for $15 per month with unlimited data and using that as an internet hot spot?

[@valeried2941]

Most companies will work with you for internet and or waive fee if you are in a bind!

[@kristinam2719]

Being that SLO (pronounced slow) is a beach town with a university, it is very expensive, even though it’s not the Bay Area or Laguna Beach.

[@karenrowles9788]

Exactly.

[@sheila3936]

The girls are old enough they can start being involved in a variety of ways. Maybe they take on more chores so mom can spend time earning extra income, the one with dietary restrictions should be very involved in food and meal prep which could help cutdown on the food budget. Maybe they do some babysitting or small jobs to earn money for their wants or college savings. Start rough outlining their future schooling so they can plan for either getting a part time job later, or improving grades or focusing on athletics or whatever can earn them scholarships. Just be mindful not to use them as a crutch. (ie. using their incomes to get by, relying on them for emotional support in lieu of friends/partner).

[@susanreddy2277]

Depending on how much time /and typeof treatment; cam can Invisaline braces be substituted for the traditional braces? I've heard they are less costly and can be covered by insurance.

[@traciedye9633]

Invisaline are more expensive than traditional braces.

[@sylviam9415]

Great video! Was is you thought on buying used cars if you commute far! Typically, you want a newer car if you commute 30 miles plus to work.

[@dianasimplifies]

Lol I commute farther than that and I have a car that is a Buick 2000 and a truck that is a 2003 Ford. So yes it can def be done. I’ve always commuted with used vehicles. I don’t buy newer anything as far as cars go.

[@laceybiddy2434]

You just need a reliable car. I wouldn't want to put tons of miles on a brand new car.