3 Things: Husband kicks out wife, Husband leaves wife for old flame, Husband isn't pulling weight

[@nicolewood7957]

Men who never want kids… and also don’t get vasectomies 🤔

[@vanaphill2454]

Or wear condoms.

[@LisaFrank39]

That part. But you know the value men put in their peens pathetic

[@moniquej369]

Or at least use a condom. Smh. Boy math at its finest.

[@crestfire8008]

They have no accountability

[@MN-hv5xv]

Part of the great mysteries of life😂😂😂😊

[@Hopdog230]

He kicks out a new mom 8 weeks postpartum.. she’s still healing, breastfeeding.. and he tells her to leave. Yeah she’s right to divorce him.

[@ayamempress1579]

Right?! If he needed to "process what was happening" he should have taken himself to a hotel or to his mother's house and let her stay in her comfort zone. He didn't even consider the impact of how moving a new born out if its home environment too early is destabilising.... MOST women (I know exceptions exist) don't leave the house for at least 3 months when the baby comes.... Heck, they'll both be sleeping for the best part of those 8 weeks.. it's about establishing an initial immune system for the baby too... it's so much to parenting for the environment to be voluntarily toxic like this from jump. This man does not deserve the privilege of procreation. By the time his mama assaulted his wife, it was FAR too late. She was disrespecting her from the beginning... for me, new mothers should not have anybody in their immediate environment for the first 6 months in the very least... just to be able to create the loving environment a baby needs to develop best.... Sorry, your comment sparked this short essay 😅... I just think in this day and age we neglect women so much but especially when it comes to our most vulnerable time, pregnancy and infancy of our babies. I say "our" even though I'm child free... I love children... and I support women and everything we are, periodt. and I'll be damned if I don't lay my life down making the world better for women, especially the ones who bless us with babies 😊

[@prettylifeprettywife7171]

If he needed to process he should have left. WTH!

[@MH-pj9qk]

This is how he ‘protects & provides’ for his family.

[@ShielaM-p1w]

He said it like she was a visitor in that house. But that was get HOME, where all her belongings and tools for the baby are, her safety net. he kicked her out if her safety while she has a new baby and dealing with post partum. This is a demon

[@aprilchow-chee5281]

​@ayamemprness1579 no he should have stayed and talk it through! Going by the demon who started it

[@LetsTalkAboutItWithMara]

I literally started clapping at the first story when e wife handed him the divorcé papers!! The relationship some mothers have with the heir sons is disgusting like ma’am do you want to sleep with your son

[@mpc562]

Same here! I literally uttered out loud "F*c* yeah" when I that part was read. Good for her

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

Yes!! There's so many times red flags were waving in my face! She was quick to get out and be done with that 💩! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 I wish I had!!!

[@LetsTalkAboutItWithMara]

@@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066 we live and we learn I’ve had red flags being thrown at me before too and turned a blind eye in the past

[@marshaM22]

The son/husband dynamic some mother-in-laws have is so weird. I'm glad that the wife is soon to be an ex-wife after leaving that situation!

[@LetsTalkAboutItWithMara]

@@marshaM22 yes it gives emotional incest

[@chanelf.4934]

First OP is a HORRIBLE person. He is able to recognize the red flags around him with his mom but still didn’t defend his wife. Loser.

[@karmAnonymous]

That's the thing I've NEVER understood.... I personally have grown up severely abused & I just as easily have a weird relationship with my parent, but I don't. I am 27 & 7 years ago I began to take responsibility for changing despite if I wanted to I could blame the horror I endured that I didn't deserve but that's ridiculous. Someone has to stop the cycle! These dudes are WORTHLESS & in love with their moms. It makes me sick

[@Jujubean9795]

He should have started yelling as soon as the mom Escalated the argument. Put your wife and new baby out??!!? That’s not how marriage works.

[@vanaphill2454]

Men move on quickly as if they never loved the woman.

[@katcraig7525]

It's because they didn't.

[@IbhadeArabome]

@@katcraig7525I was just going to write this.

[@crestfire8008]

It's because they don't

[@beeautifuldreamer2211]

​@@katcraig7525I agree 10000%they aren't capable of love that's why they move on so quickly.

[@rebekkagasmi9451]

Because they never did...

[@OO9O9]

He screamed "enough", and kicked everyones out? He's full of himself.

[@louhortonsculpture]

Exactly. You didn’t get to be the “good guy” by acting like you’re above the violence. The mom baited the whole situation and purposely waited for him to go outside before starting it.

[@raynebow5289]

@@louhortonsculpture *exactly* and the mom *wanted* his wife to physically defend herself so the mom had a reason to say "See, this is why she doesn't belong in our lives"

[@MarcustheWu]

​@@louhortonsculptureand he 100% knew what his mom was doing and he still went along with it.

[@stephe1506]

Also kicking everyone out including his wife really showed how deep down he considers the home HIS, not theirs

[@TheePrincessBrat]

If he knows his childhood is still impacting him, to the point he’ll throw out his wife and newborn, he should’ve been talked to a therapist. Has he considered how anxious or scared his wife feels having his toxic mom in *her* home with *her* baby?? He’s not the victim at all. I hope she follows through with the divorce. What a loser

[@kineticmeow9242]

Yeah he should have been going to therapy and dealing with that trauma before even having a baby. His wife literally popped out a kid for him and then he just kicks her out after her food was taken away and she was physically hit. He was only thinking of his perspective and not his wife’s. This is WHY the childfree movement among women are growing cause they are seeing and reading the BS other women go through.

[@louhortonsculpture]

His mother would have also known about his trauma around physical violence. That’s why she started it by hitting the new mother right in the place she’s most vulnerable, along with a “you’re fat insult,” classic. Mom must have hit wife very hard to make her just punch back as a reflex. Wife didn’t have time to think about her husband’s trauma with violence, she simply reacted. His mom knew he might overreact to violence so that’s why hit a new healing mother!!! Straight evil. This isn’t a school yard/sibling “they hit first!” situation. It’s the mom ending her son’s marriage on purpose.

[@louhortonsculpture]

@@kineticmeow9242💯exactly. This is so scary, I’m not strong enough to handle that level of abuse. A lot of us aren’t. And none of us need to.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@louhortonsculpture I don’t think I saw him counter the insult about her physical appearance. He did not stand up for her in anyway. You can’t trust a spineless man to be a good husband or father

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@kineticmeow9242 he’s too scared to stand up to his mom. He put everyone out, as if it was anyone’s fault besides his mother’s. Something tells me he won’t be NC with his mom forever

[@MsMookalate]

So your mom slab your healing wife in the injury and your wife defending herself is the aggressor. He earned that divorce.

[@Southern.Nappiness]

He earned that divorce with gold stars.😂😂😂

[@beautyininsanity421]

He got some damn extra credit with this one, lol!

[@vilee1877]

Never mess with a hungry, exclusively breastfeeding woman.....never!!!!😭

[@IndigobluBeauty]

THIS!! I straight up lunged at my son’s father - while he was holding our 5 day old son - bc i had come back to the kitchen to get the pbj sandwich i just made…i was hungry, tired, breastfeeding exclusively (which was every 2 hours) and to see him eating MY SANDWICH made my blood boil. I realized that this is what it meant for your hormones to be all the way off after giving birth. He gave me back my sandwich lol

[@Fingerscrossedout]

​@IndigobluBeauty the fucking audacity to eat it .. wth is wrong with him

[@mindfulnae4904]

Wow I couldn’t imagine.. I’m currently 4months postpartum and my stomach still hurts and I’m breastfeeding.. I don’t even like people going in my fridge let alone to give my food away.. he should just sign them papers without complaint

[@beeautifuldreamer2211]

Facts food is life to a breastfeeding mom. I breastfed my baby for 5 months. I would've dogged walked his mom for touching my food and slapping my healing belly😅🤜🏾🤛🏾

[@Gumbier_Than]

Dig that that lady caught a fade from that. 👊🏾

[@intentionalgreatness]

" i care about you"...after she literally just gave birth?! The audaciousness of men never ceases to amaze me.

[@TheRealist00]

Completely agree. I had a guy use that same exact line on me after 5 years and a baby together. Like, damn that’s news to me. Our daughter is now 17 and I’m less than a year away from never having to deal with him again - I’m so excited!

[@Jujubean9795]

He doesn’t care about her or that baby.In fact, she is less useful to him after giving birth because all of her is focused on the baby.

[@blasiankiki7831]

@@Jujubean9795I would have not let him know I returned back to the USA. Would have let him think I was living back in my country… forget you know me

[@YmustTh3w0rldG0r0und]

The audacity*

[@inprogress5210]

I love the behavior of the 1st OPs wife. She was able to make the right decision. He didn't defend his wife when HIS mother hit her. But yet the punch is what triggered him?!! And he chased her and the newborn out of the house? He deserves to be alone. He's full of it.

[@FantasticBooo]

Amen to that ... The guy will be looking for support on reddit ... What a shame

[@MsTishalish]

He didn't care where a hungry postpartum woman and their 8 week old were going to go.

[@RaspberryHugs]

The comment is slightly wrong though. He isn't as bad as his dad. He's worse.

[@OGK-1414]

My heart is hurting for the atrocious behavior women have been groomed by family and society to accept. Just awful.

[@MarcustheWu]

I was reading the comments as I listened. I knew what was coming, but my mouth STILL dropped when he told his wife to leave. THESE MEN! These are the protectors and providers?!?!

[@oblivionslight1346]

My blood boiled as you read the first story. This is why the “family first” concept is 💩. Watch how a potential partner/spouse deals with toxic family. This isn’t talked about enough when it comes to dating. If they won’t defend you, they don’t deserve you. I hope the wife and baby have a bright future.

[@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living]

Exactly.

[@ADR-xn6dg]

They forget that family first changes when a marriage and children happen.

[@sommerprettygirlgamer2719]

Same

[@Jujubean9795]

@@ADR-xn6dgthis. His Family is his wife and new baby.

[@trichmomma]

The first story made me so angry. 7 months of his mom avoiding the wife and making comments about her. He says he grew up in an abusive household and to see his mother get punched in the face was triggering. Then afterwards says his wife grew up in a similar environment. So being slapped on her postpartum belly couldn't possibly be triggering to his wife? He needs space but made his wife and child leave instead of leaving himself? He didn't even think about his wife, or child for that matter. He knows his mom is abusive and he allowed it into his home and marriage. She was right to divorce him. And for him to tell her that that wasn't what HE wanted was the final nail in his self centered selfish ssa coffin.

[@victoriagreen3047]

Being thrown out is a traumatic event and being forced into homelessness.

[@emberya9561]

The fact that OP mentioned in his comment that his mother has slapped his wife so hard that it made loud slap sound is astonishing. It's so hard to make a slapping sound with the fabric inbetween. All of that on pp belly. Then he has audacity to come to reddit to ask whether he is an a-hole. Men raised by abusive fathers really think that they are all that simply because they don't actively beat their wives.

[@shakirasmith6454]

That last sentence!!!

[@GrungeGalactica]

Yep and in my experience they take zero accountability years later, for any bad behaviour cause their parent beat them. I’m sure it fukks you up, but as an adult you have the ability to work through that.

[@aaunyea4799]

Good on the wife in the first story 👏. I hate people put up with abuse from in-laws, stand up for yourself!

[@Lysistrata2025]

He tells his wife to leave, and she is like "Aight, bet!" and he goes Pikachu. Classic BnB storytime.

[@sarahcover7248]

First story; that man made a cardinal mistake, he showed his wife that she is not safe wuth him. Men think that if they don't hit you, you must feel safe. But this man endangered her and her childs living situation. Kicked her out of her own house. And prooved that she had zero emotional or physical safety with him. He left her no choice if she wanted herself and her child to be safe other than to leave him. Groveling won't let her feel safe. There is probably nothing that he could ever do to allow her to feel safe with him again. If he would kick her out 4 weeks postpartum what wouldn't he do? That though would always be in the back of her mind if she went back to him. Idk why most men don't understand or maybe they don't care what an ordeal childbirth is.

[@wellknown1204]

Right!!! And he has the audacity to say that she was violance, like sir, She was DEFENDING herself from your mom stomach slap. And imagine all the bottle up anger and frustration that she felt after all the pregnancy from his mother.

[@SuperGlue4321]

I believe a child is produced by a woman’s body, it’s entirely her problem. It’s never the man’s problem. The man has nothing to do with it. They only care about the child when it comes with benefits. No amount of work will make men care about it. Sex costs them nothing, they pay zero costs for the suffering of producing life, only the woman’s body is vulnerable to it and thus it is only her problem. Women are too delulu trying to build a family with them, you are all alone. Always were. NOBODY cares about women, only their produce. it cannot be done, just face the truth.

[@BabalonNuit]

They don't care. All they care about is themselves. Women are just excrescences on existence to men like this; we don't register as "human beings".

[@AuntieThree]

I would like to buy the wife in the first story a drink 😊

[@moniquej369]

Lol!! Right! She was not playing any games! I wish more women would do the same.

[@DiverseDalliance786]

The first writer’s mother provoked all of that, and the writer allowed it to escalate to that by having not done something before then. There is no way that that was the first time the mother tried to undermine his wife or his marriage. She finally got her wish.

[@rumooooni]

Is like his mother likes instigating/ causing problems (aka wanting to experience violence/ instability because of her ex) I know trauma is strong but that woman purposely starving his own daughter in law while making a close relative overweight (yes the relative being overweight is a red flag because it tells me his mother is overfeeding/abusing that child.....) she instigated just to keep her incestuous relationship with her son and damage the relationship

[@yari4550]

I don't buy that the husband in the first story reacted that way out of a trauma response. He should have left if he was so traumatized. But instead, he kicks out his vulnerable wife who is two months post-partum, and his newborn baby. He may have more of his father's abusive tendencies than he's letting on. In any case, the wife has learned that when a situation pops off, he'll be too busy huddled in the corner in the fetal position nursing his childhood trauma, rather than protecting her or their child. He's worthless either way. She should divorce him.

[@Egh0127]

He's using that as an excuse. There's no trauma in the world that will make a man kick out his postpartum wife and newborn. He wanted her gone because now he would have to hear BS from his mom. He doesn't care about his trauma or her well being or he would've been in therapy for years. He doesn't care about his wife or even like her.

[@nmorto2013]

We can never say how any traumatized person will react. Anything can be trauma. And she's right to leave bc that's a no win situation. Its toxic

[@Alicia-rn8bg]

This !!! The apple doesn't fall far from the tree

[@IntellectuallyKurious]

This man out his wife and newborn out the house after she was disrespected, verbally and physically assaulted in her OWN home? Instead of making sure shes ok he kicked her out. Glad she dervef him divorce papers

[@thandondlovu5392]

The wife was absolutely right he didn't defend her he is absolutely the worst 😠. Your first automatic response when dealing with your family attacking your spouse is to side with your spouse (Unless your spouse is abusive, unfaithful or doing something illegal).

[@LaiLai..]

First story: he is absolutely the AH . If he needed space , then he should have said that and left the house to go for a drive or something. Instead he kicked his wife and baby out?! The wife is vulnerable in multiple ways being as though she just had a baby. He should have immediately comforted her. 2nd story:this is an example of a man using a woman as a placeholder. Yes a man can marry you, start a family etc and still use you as a placeholder. It’s dangerous out here. Never date or marry a man who doesn’t love you more than you love him.

[@Jujubean9795]

That’s no guarantee. The second husband loved the his ex more.

[@rumooooni]

True my great grandmother was left abandoned in a america with 12 kids married and all that man left her for random mistress neighbor left the kids and his OWN WIFE homeless/ hungry..... luckily she managed to save what she could and come back home with family, luckily my grandmother married my grandpa and he said " a man must love you MORE always MORE than you love him" ❤ 😊😊 he loves my gma so much gave her the world

[@LaiLai..]

@@Jujubean9795yea because he never loved the wife more than she loved him . She realized that she missed those signs early on in the relationship. He settled for her.

[@marie_williams]

1st story: What gets me in this story is how the husband's mother could hit her daughter-in-law in the belly when she has just given birth. She's a mother herself, she knows what it feels like in the aftermath and did that!!! I was so glad daughter-in-law slapped her back, she earned it.

[@sammijo125]

Quick decisive action on wife’s part. Protect yourself and your peace ladies.

[@ceenichole6866]

The way these men will not go to bat for their wives and mother if their children is wild to me. He was a coward and doesn’t deserve her.

[@SuperGlue4321]

Most men are.

[@west913]

The first OP story is an example of what women should do (if possible) when men immediately show you who they are. My hope is the last OP gains the courage of the first and gets the strength to divorce that petulant child she is married to.

[@morighani]

this. i’m extremely impressed. she did not waste ANY time after that awful situation! I don’t know how much she endured before then but in that moment she was very confident, strong, and wise. aspirational

[@33-vertebrae]

At the end of the first story when OP says "I'm going to go kiss ass now". He still thinks he has a chance to sway her back and that annoys me. You never see that when women screw up. When men are done, they are done and they don't let up, but men who screw up always think they can grovel enough to get the woman back that they don't deserve. Like, no leave her alone.

[@amberinthemist7912]

It's honestly scary. He thinks he has a right to get his wife back after completely failing as a husband. It's men like that who hurt their ex, getting her back is all pure ego.

[@awg7068]

And "Kiss Ass". Not go apologize for his f-ery, not explain to her that he's seen the light and beg for forgiveness, but go "Kiss Ass" like it wasn't that big of a deal and he's being forced to do something ridiculous for it. 🤬

[@TheMiss600]

Because he didn't protect his wife properly at an early stage, husband gave mummy dearest licence to escalate to the point of opening up their fridge and slapping his wife.

[@Xena395]

Kicks out wife for old flame 😮😢? This is why I refuse to bargain with these men, there’s no telling what result you’ll get mingling with them. You won’t know if you’re the placeholder, the one, the starter wife, or if he’s still obsessed with some ex. As the sovereign woman youtuber says, is to not entertain them at all, and decenter them. Cause there’s no way to vet the most deceitful species.

[@Lokian_Mermaid]

Of course the OP in story 1 is the AH. But, he's been the AH long before this incident. He should have made very clear boundaries with his mother and been protecting his wife long before now.

[@SuperGlue4321]

Are we gonna expect chimps to eat with forks and knives next?

[@lroberts462]

Okay so the husband in the first story keeps saying that the wife "punched" the mother in the face but, are we going to forget this was a response to being "slapped" in the stomach!!! Is he dumb or stupid??? Hard or not when you put your hands on people there are consequences😮

[@lroberts462]

@sarahw7616 for real!!!

[@shakirasmith6454]

Typical narcissistic response: they focus on your reaction to their abuse, rather than taking accountability for their initial abuse🤦🏾‍♀️.

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

He's the a-hole. He should've left.

[@nmorto2013]

He definitely should've left.

[@susanplatt5331]

Mil when it's a son are the worst. They're jealous and competitive and their baby boy can do no wrong, they intefere, judge and look down their nose at the wife . I've experienced it and witnessed it many times, even when he's abusive, she'll defend him. Mother's mollycoddle their son's.

[@stimela1000]

Doesn't have to be that way. I loved my ex's mum. She was wonderful and we got on really well. I was devastated when she died. She never treated me badly, and I could always confide in her, even about her son's awful behaviour. I know I got lucky with my MIL, pity her son was an abusive pos who modelled himself on his father.

[@MiniM69]

100 percent “boy mom” and “grown adult son” foolishness. Honestly, it’s good she knows now!

[@hibiscusqueen6423]

I loved the way the wife moved, she wasn’t playing. Love your content Burb n Bougie! ❤

[@BurbNBougie]

Glad you enjoyed it

[@1nekiss]

I read the first story yesterday and thought about you, but didn’t know how to tag you. Pure insanity to kick out your wife and infant child.

[@raynebow5289]

If you go to her bio, she has an email address you can send stories too. That's how I was able to share the codependent story with her.

[@VirgoGoddessXxo]

He’s definitely the AH & I would have left and never came back too. His wife is smart. That incident was a predictor of what the rest of the marriage would entail… him constantly putting the mother before his wife and child. I find it interesting how his wife defending herself triggered him, but his mother assaulting and ridiculing his wife did not. He’s only realizing he’s wrong because he now has no wife at home.

[@BabalonNuit]

He hasn't got his wife appliance anymore and is inconvenienced.

[@brandy4530]

The peepeebro, this makes so much sense. These men are the main characters in their life. Everyone else is there to support their character while they bounce from one situation to another. It makes total sense that he would be bored with a long term wife, two kids, and no financial problems. The love of his life is himself, and he wants the thrill of “rescuing” a woman from his youth from an old rival. It’s sad because the OP didn’t deserve to be caught up in that kind of crap.

[@Iamchristaelaine]

They need to be still. Mom is obviously out of control. He should’ve put mom out!!!

[@BurbNBougie]

Nah. She was not out of control. She responded immediately to a threat. Then she sat down and thought about it. She sees that her husband will not protect her if there's an immediate threat. She acted immediately as a human. He went into a shell and told her that he basically couldn't deal with immediate threats. She should totally leave. She has a child to think about. He didn't think about his child when he kicked his wife out. F him

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@BurbNBougie nowhere in his story did he say where his wife and baby stayed. He didn’t say anything about asking where she was going before she left either. Idk how he’s doing with the provider role but he’s certainly failing miserably when it comes to protecting.

[@LaiLai..]

@@BurbNBougieI think she was referring to the mother in law and not the wife .

[@BurbNBougie]

Oh shoot. I apologize!!!!! His mom was outta line. And I totally read that wrong. I am sorry

[@maam-yj8ph]

I agree that in the immediate story being told mother-in-law is the a-hole-in-chief. Even though we got some background on husband's trauma drama, I still am not understanding why the mother-in-law had such animosity towards the wife.

[@icemaniceman-rx5wr]

Ladies you still haven't realized that the lock down of you is pregnancy. The moment you get pregnant a man knows you are stuck ,and that's when his fun kicks in

[@norastorm99]

Not for everyone tho. Some women actually think about having a child as "can I take full responsibility of this child if anything happens?" Not everyone is stupid and not thinking responsibly about it 😚 some also have big support system so they will get by but yeah some of them seem to be kinda trapped 🫤

[@dorkygirlsurvivalist3482]

If he needed space why would he put her and his baby out after she was attacked. Disgusting.

[@msthang5366]

The amount of women that are the primary breadwinners is alarming to me. Now, I really see why folks fight me so hard on my stance about not wanting marriage or partnership. As my grandmother says, “misery loves company”.

[@thekameru6058]

Story 1 - dude earned all the space he could ever dream of. May he be happy with the life he chose.

[@piscespisces6]

Seems like nowadays having kids is the beginning of the end of relationships and marriages

[@msj793]

Firs story is what I wish I should have done when my ex husbands mother got out of line the first time. Notice I said ex husband!!! Don’t take this kinda sh*t get out early!

[@BabalonNuit]

Better to observe potential MILs closely BEFORE tying the knot!

[@msj793]

@ amen

[@PeacefulAbiding]

Was this house not where the wife lived? He kicked out his WIFE?!

[@sawyerharris3721]

Right I’m astonished at his audacity that he somehow thought he had any right to kick her out of her home in the first place, as if she were trespassing. He needed some fucking space, huh. Well congratulations sir, you have all the space from her you need for all eternity.

[@SuperGlue4321]

@@sawyerharris3721 Too little, too late. The woman is already in a house with him and already got in a dangerous situation due to him and also abandoned and assaulted with a newborn child. I mean, at what point do we say that the damage is irreversible. Her time, body and mind are gone, and more will be needed for healing, but this man’s child is out there and her mother is all alone bitter and unloved. Her leaving him does nothing to repair this horror story. The cycle is just about to repeat.

[@moniquej369]

Anytime a toxic person decides to remove themselves from your life they’re doing you a favor. Don’t get upset about it. Also, God works in mysterious ways. His ex randomly coming back into his life after 17 years was Gods way of exposing him and letting his wife see him for who he truly is. She’s better off without him.

[@vikki8699]

Whole heartedly agreed ❤

[@WanderlustHomebody]

Exactly. He can now be the ex-girlfriend's problem.

[@PraiseJ-Pope]

I'm not religious but you're damn right

[@TheePrincessBrat]

3rd story: Girl run. He’s taking his frustration and lack of direction out on you. It sounds more like she has a difficult teenage son than a husband. Him refusing therapy says it all. Maybe he’s hoping she’ll leave him. A relationship needs both people to put in effort, she can’t be the only one fighting for the family. Tbh, if he loved her, there would be no fight at all. Sending pics while she’s stuck at home. Like he’s taunting her. Is he a frenemy or a husband?

[@louhortonsculpture]

Acting worse and worse hoping you’ll leave him is such an insane and common tactic. I hate it so much.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@louhortonsculpture It’s cowardly

[@soul-deeplevel-up6179]

She should leave… him with the child. Ask for visitation. Eventually relocate back to be closer to her family.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

2nd story: idk why I understood that sentence as “we just had a 3 week old and she told me…” I had to skip back and hear that again 😂 It’s crazy how men don’t move on. Tbh I think it’s more to do with their ego being bruised. Cause how at 34 are you still obsessed with someone you knew almost 2 decades ago. Why haven’t you moved on?? Men will let you put all your eggs in their basket and flip that thing upside down in front of you. Smdh Projection spotted 🚩🚩 they’re the ones that fear dying alone (but we already know that).

[@Southern.Nappiness]

There are so many men like him. They're always talking about their high school days. Those fools are 30 to 50 yrs old now.😂

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@Southern.Nappiness Idk how they don’t feel embarrassed. Especially abandoning their family over it. It’s really pathetic tbh.

[@t.shepherd8630]

I know a guy who hasn’t moved on from his ex.. and is currently married, he and his wife broke up and he got into a new relationship that lasted a year and he thought the best thing to do was to go back to his wife. But they don’t move on because they keep the fantasy alive in their head, he for example goes on his exes social media and looks at her photos and says cringy things about “she the one that got away…”but then he had 2 more kids with his wife.. like sir shut up. He said his wife said she doesn’t love herself.. I told him probably because she can feel you are not being honest. Lurking on your exes socials and he hides her account on mute so the wife doesn’t see her pop up on his feed. Dude is delusional.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@t.shepherd8630 woww. His wife should call up one of her exes she’s cool with and see how he feels. I cannot believe he feels no shame or guilt acting like that. It’s so parasitic how they will build placeholder family’s to fulfill their needs and boost their image in the meantime

[@foxy2796]

Yup it definitely has a lot to do with ego and a little bit to do with the fact a lot of them are delulu and romanticize the type of partner a woman is based off a daily "hi" and smile. That's why if you cut a man off before he gets a chance to see what you'd be like in reality when you've been dealing with him fr and not in a casual or platonic setting they will stalk you for life because it's a fantasy

[@mariapaz6379]

On the second story, op reads the situation so well. It gives me hope that she will be fine regardless of his mess, because she can see through that madness. That aside, i want to point out that the man in that story, doesn't love the other woman either, because he doesn't know the other woman. He talks about what he feels, what he thinks, what he believes. But as op pointed out, the woman has kids, her dad doesn't like him, her ex is abusive, the ex is also very involved in her life still, etc etc. But he talks about highschool feelings?? My man is just so lost and so so stupid.

[@shaypope4732]

All these men not caring after their wives made the ultimate sacrifice by having their baby is crazy this exactly why I ✌️out and will remain cf

[@comkver]

He's only team mom because she left.

[@FireSilver25]

My blood is BOILING over that first OP!!!! I’ve never given birth but even I know how absolutely spent and wrecked pregnancy can leave women! That boy mom obviously has issues and that family needed therapy before bringing a DIL in. I’m sure there were more red flags with that mother and she shouldn’t have even been allowed around their house. He reminds me of an ex who was really controlling and who wanted everyone around him to toe the line and have relationships according to his plan. He also kicked me out once because I wasn’t falling in line. I slept in my car under my sunshade for warmth. And when I convinced him to be decent he’d eventually blow up because “I’ve been kissing your ass for a week!!!” I’m so glad his ex punched that awful woman! It must’ve felt sooooo good! But she probably cried her heart out when he kicked her out. It had a happy ending at least when she served him papers!!!! So proud of her and so glad she had a support system it seems. How do you not know what pregnancy does to a woman’s body at that point???? Even I know about abdominal tearing and stuff!!!!! And when he referred to making amends as “gotta go kiss ass” I just about punched something myself. He needs therapy, not a wife. After he’s bricked up in an attic!

[@nki5ikni5i45]

9:04 oooh that's cold... She just gave birth to his child 3wks ago after 5yrs together and he says he "Cares" for her! 😮 Wow

[@pink1237480]

He should have stood up for his wife. When you get married your spouse comes before your mom and dad.

[@beeautifuldreamer2211]

I understand why the first wife asked for a divorce. After all that was described about his mother's disrespectful behavior prior to this moment she shouldn't have even been at their house especially while the wife was there. He set her up to be disrespected again by his mom and postpartum she's lucky the wife only hit her once. The second story is horrible. I hope she finds her happy place in life again and he had to pay her alimony. The last story is grounds for divorce. He can't wait to make the wife the bread winner, nanny, maid, cook,s*x slave etc etc. She needs to run back home where she had support he can be lazy as hell by himself.

[@raynebow5289]

The first story is just a shock to me. How *dare* the husband say he was triggered by his wife defending herself because of his traumatic childhood. Does he not see that since his mom was an enabler to his dad's abuse, HE became an enabler to *his mom's abuse* ? I refuse to believe he truly thinks his wife's actions were "out of left field" when his mom has been antagonizing and antagonizing, and antagonizing his wife for the past YEAR at least, and when his wife - who JUST gave birth, so I KNOW she's still healing and in pain - defends herself from his mom slapping her *healing belly* , NOW he wants to get triggered?? He *deserves* to be alone with his abusive mom and I wish nothing but the best for his patient wife 😤💖

[@hubabaloop]

Last one’s husband doesn’t have a job and the kid still goes to daycare…

[@ShielaM-p1w]

4:32 "I'm team wife"...AFTER he got divorce papers. SPARE US!!!

[@LilLadyAy]

The mother assaulted her, after a fat joke, after stealing her food. This guy is a joker needing to "process" everything in empty house, way to go building a family, will the children need to gtfo each time he's stressed and needs to ''process''.

[@rumooooni]

😂 I heard diamonds are made under pressure clearly his wife was a diamond while he was cheap busted metal like his busted ugly mother for being disrespectful she just wanted to scapegoat t wifeL

[@cosmosadorabilis7677]

I really hope the HS sweetheart in the second story, plays him hard, and laughs her way into the arms of a Chad. The wife is going to thrive, she's clearly a smart and discerning woman. She'll win ❤

[@TheePrincessBrat]

He’ll either be her useful idiot or she will leave him altogether. But i highly doubt she’ll be the dream he’s expecting. She’s showing a very clear pattern when it comes to her relationships.

[@GenXsinglefree]

Wife clocked the horrible mil. Love this woman! Mil struck first and I believe in reciprocity.

[@queenreg7]

Great right hook.

[@Vanessa-ii7cc]

For the first wife, good job mama. You reserve more.

[@EmpressJusticeTarot]

The only thought I have with regards to the first OP is "why didn't he defend his wife?" If I had a spouse, there is absolutely no way somebody could disrespect them in front of me, especially if they are a loving spouse.

[@NottyAries]

S1: Putting your hands on someone is saying you're ready for violence. I'm glad she's leaving her sorry excuse for a husband because he showed that he is incapable of protecting and supporting his wife when she's traumatized.

[@CatloafCreative]

All these men neglected themselves first and all these stories show how men need to go to therapy and do better in general. If you don't want to be like your dad go to therapy. Just "not doing what he did" on the surface layer fails to change toxic patterns. You have to do the work. Story 1: If he had identified his triggers and worked on enmeshment that situation would have been different. He likely would have still been in freeze/protect mode but his wife and baby would have been part of that in group. His growing independence from his violent mother would have made neutralizing the threat more cut and dry. I have compassion for the mom,but her stealing food and hitting are signs of unhealed trauma that are actively hurting others is inexcusable. Mom needs therapy too. Story 2: Unhealthy attachment, low self esteem, emotional unavailability, and an inability to grieve. If he was able to work on himself he would let go of that childish relationship. No one is really that great in high school and holding onto to "the one that got away" is delusional. Had he done the work he wouldn't be doing the sad boi shuffle on the other side of the world wasting that OP's time. Best case, he'd be able to fully accept her love while continuing to grow. I mean they shared an office so they clearly had compatibility and he blew up that relationship for a dream. Story 3: Guy is an immature selfish ass that needs to learn empathy. He needs to do better times a million. Her leaving him or finding a way to divest is the feedback he needs. These stories would be way less tragic if the men would prioritize mental health, empathy, and understand their feelings. And still have the time the worst thing that happens to them is "Oh my woman left me, it so unfair" while the women have children, bills, and a career in shambles. For every woman that takes a cautionary tale and avoids this fate we are doing the great work.

[@chanson8508]

Great analysis 👍🏽 Clearly you have started doing the werk 👏

[@CatloafCreative]

@@chanson8508 thanks, 7 years of rebuilding and a lifetime of work ahead 🙏🏽

[@unanuevapecula]

2nd story I hope she takes him for everything 😊. ' Don't get mad, get everthing' First Wives Club 3rd story he don't want a divorce because he would end up broke and homeless.

[@Sweetdreamz313]

I’ve learned a long time ago to let anyone who wants to leave GO some things are for a reason ❤rejection usually is protection it may hurt but you’ll live

[@nightstarstar1]

All I’m getting from all three of these stories is women really have to be careful about having babies with these men. Don’t have them without a plan about how you’re going to take care of them on your own because these men are completely unreliable and will change and abandon you when you’re at your most vulnerable.

[@nmorto2013]

I agree!

[@nekohimesama553]

maybe that's why the childfree movement is so popular. no one wants to deal with these males and their switch up games

[@nightstarstar1]

@@nekohimesama553 true!

[@sekinab.3329]

My favorite thing to hear from these videos is when they talk about the red flags that they ignored. I think if we focus on spotting the red flags and acting accordingly and not ignoring them, maybe women will start to see patterns. Especially since we can’t vet them. Can we get some stories about not ignoring the red flags?

[@GreekYogurtGranola]

I’m glad that the first wife defended herself in the first story. The mom started the physical assault first.

[@inabina2925]

He forced his wife and child into homelessness (couch surfing). That was HER HOME that he threw her out of, 8 weeks postpartum after defending herself from being violently assaulted in her still healing stomach. He is lucky she didn’t press charges.

[@janjanl1812]

These stories are true life horror stories on romance! And a good reminder to me to stay out of dating pool.

[@danifranc7011]

If he needed space he could have left . Dont put the woman and baby out!!! Im so proud of the wife how she handled it.

[@sylviaj270]

This reminds me that I am so glad that I am single.

[@Emptytopfloor]

When will women understand that someone saying they love you and them actually loving you are two whole different things.

[@thereasajohnson5540]

He should have left and went to a hotel. He’s a clown. I love that the wife understood that she did not come first, and chose herself.

[@thereasajohnson5540]

The dude that went on vacay should have taken the bay to see the grandfather. Wtf?

[@amyyaku5022]

S1: Definitely the AH. The wife finally had enough of her mil 👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾 If OP kicked his mom out earlier none of this would've happened. And if he was really on her wife's side, he would've asked if SHE was okay and gave HER space, and made HER more food. But at the end of the day all he cared about was himself🤦🏽‍♂️

[@IsItMe023]

How come...the 1st one didn't just leave...to go get the space he needed?

[@breeyanna99]

So, his now ex-wife getting slapped by his mother didn’t trigger him? But his ex wife defending herself and her unborn child did? If someone slapped my stomach, I’d react the same. Pregnant or not.

[@OraborusO]

Goes to see his 70 year old father.....how about take the kid with you while your wife is working?

[@Indyghurl]

Therapy only happens once you leave the relationship, it's a way of hoovering you back in. Until you leave they will never go to therapy unless it suits their needs

[@ADR-xn6dg]

Yep. I begged for therapy for more than a year when I was still married to my ex husband. He never took it seriously. I left and now he is in therapy for the past 4 years, I don’t actually believe him since nothing has changed about him nor his actions

[@EncyclopediaBrittanica]

For everyone, man or woman, if you want to have children - you have to work through your traumas and issues BEFORE having them. Otherwise, your previous negative experiences will affect your significant other and the raising of your child/children. That man let his experiences with his father and mother allow him to not be available to protect and support his wife, who NEEDED him after being humiliated by his mother and defended herself. That woman had it coming. His mother, having gone through stuff is no excuse for her being a Grade-A C-Word.

[@GoldenMermaid]

So he kicks a new mother and baby from her home so HE can get the space he needs. He should have left for a car ride or something and let the wife have the house and i rlly dont think he needed a full week

[@BB-gd7ez]

I think she didn't respond to him for a full week. He started calling and texting a few hours later. She came back a week later with divorce papers.

[@nawal10]

1st story: when faced with adversity he chose himself and kicked out his own family. Coming back will allow him to do it again or even worse. She did the right thing. It's tough but

[@Southern.Nappiness]

That wife in the first story didn't play around at all. She wasted no time handing him those papers. That MIL and husband would have ran her crazy! Better run!! Story #2 That man is definitely an idiot with arrested development. I've known men, in their 30s to 50s, who kept talking about their high school days like it was yesterday. It sounded so weird and childish to me.

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

The lazy guy in the last story was being ridiculously lazy and selfish with his vacation AND complaining about how she handled her job, baby, and the housework while he was on VACATION!!!🙄 It's just so unfair how little father's do for the daily needs of childcare and housework, but STILL have the audacity to complain! They'll be lazy and selfish with their time, efforts and attention when the kids are little... And then know just how to manipulate the kids and become the "fun parent" 🙄

[@saffy_9967]

I don’t think men understand how crucial and vulnerable a woman is postpartum…

[@availanila]

I know a pair of twins with a mother like the first one. The one twin married and let his nother drive her off then remarried but the second woman left telling him to stop messing with women and just eff his mom. When the other twin married he watched how he kept mom at bay and learnt. Then he renarries (third time) and even moves abroad to get away from mother dearest and things are going great till he starts letting mom visit. He left this woman with a newborn, toddler and her preteen from prior alone in a country she hadn't wanted to move to then married a woman mom gave him. She's driving this wife off too and he's bitter and thinks women will bleed you dry. He flirted with me once, I laughed in his face and his mother snapped that an ugly old blind woman shouldn't be so uppity then got huffy when i laughed in her face too. It's not women, it's his mother and him (enmeshment is creepy).

[@ogolden8315]

That’s crazy that he doesn’t see HE IS THE PROBLEM with his marriages. Yes, the mom is a factor, but the fact that he witnessed how his twin handled his mom and finally enforced boundaries and was having a decent marriage until he ALLOWED his mom back into his life and then chaos started happening shows he is the problem.

[@availanila]

@@ogolden8315 he's the worst! His twin isn't much better but somewhat good to his wife and kids but this guy I refuse to go anywhere at risk of even meeting him. His second wife slapped his mother and he not only kicked her out but messed with her job so she got fired.

[@kioleovo6705]

Story one: A man gets put in a position to be head of castle and he folds like a lawnchair. Then goes on to blame his unresolved self work as an excuse to out someone you claimed to care for and they just had your child. She was 100 right to want a divorce after that, and it’s so unfortunate that so much time has to pass, and two kids had to have been born before a person will (not can) expose their true self.

[@TheKriscg]

His wife did the right thing! Let him have his mom! 😂. He needed space after the wife was assaulted? These dudes and the toxic women on their lives are a hot mess!

[@BB-gd7ez]

1. That was a terrible experience for the new Mom. Terrible. It's an f'd situation all the way around. He should have left, and now he can't take that back. The OP should have gotten therapy for his childhood trauma prior to marriage. He went no contact with his Mom and now lost his wife. His life is in total shambles because he didn't deal with issues before. And his Mom is trash and got exactly what she deserved. She has no remorse. 2. Trash, fortunately, she is better off than most as she was able to move on and secure housing and retain her employment. It sucks, but life will work out better for her than him. 3. First of all, he should have taken the baby with him to see his elderly father. Second, I would have flown into a blind rage the minute he said I could have cleaned the house better. IKYFL, you don't like me and want a divorce. I'd give him exactly what he wants. She's not tired enough yet.

[@ayemad]

These stories put me in a BADDDD mood

[@LondonLady24]

The first guy: he should not have kicked his wife out. He could have handled it much better. His wife did the right thing.

[@CrochetIsLife54]

I left when I realized that I was basically a single parent with a double income. Why carry the deadweight?

[@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living]

First guy - he (bleep)ed up by not defending his wife and throwing HER out along with everyone else. On the plus side, he does see that his mother is toxic and has an unhealthy obsession with him, and he did cut off all contact with his mother. The second story is a cautionary tale for the green card baes. Don’t leave your country without a backup plan. The third story has an obvious answer - time to divorce him. He likes the benefits of a wife but doesn’t really love her. If he loved her, he would have found a way to make it easier for her while he was away dealing with a family issue, like hire temp help for housekeeping or childcare.