But I don’t want to hurt you!

When you think you want to be a fighter, but you would probably just wreck everybody with your sick martial arts skills so bad you’d end up regretting it. After all, your Krav marido skills are too deadly for the UFC octagon and would surely leave a horrific body count in your wake of absolute destruction.
Ramsey Dewey is an MMA coach and fight commentator based in Shanghai, China.
Thanks to my channel sponsor:
Xmartial: catering to all kinds of combat sports athletes from BJJ, MMA, Muay Thai etc. find rash guards, fight shorts, grappling spats, boxing gloves and other training gear. Use my code RAMSEY10 for a 10% discount on everything at
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This video features original music by Ramsey Dewey
Follow me on Instagram at: / ramseydewey

[@RamseyDewey]

Got questions for the next q&a with the coach? Leave them in the comments below!

[@lanemir_sindjelic]

difference between straight right and looping straight right?

[@RamseyDewey]

@@lanemir_sindjelic if it’s looping, it’s not straight.

[@mjugendomen]

@@RamseyDewey Love your channel. Thank you. Could you comment on Khamzats takedown of Li since you mentioned that you had wrestled Li?

[@RamseyDewey]

@@mjugendomen yep

[@mjugendomen]

@@RamseyDewey Thank you!

[@laurens4102]

"Everybody should train, not everybody needs to fight." This is why I keep listening.

[@rebchizelbeak5392]

Exactly.

[@konev13thebeast]

And maintain some sort of weight training program. Same sentiment applies here, everyone should lift, but not everyone needs to bodybuild.

[@rebchizelbeak5392]

@S H a better way of saying it would be strength training. That is key in keeping weight off, balance, fitness, and overall health. Doesn’t need to be with weights, but strength training is needed

[@oneguy7202]

Wise words

[@targetfootball7807]

Well, most violence in this world is cowardly and non consenting. From the school yard bully to bombing nations with no air force or air defense. But stepping into a cage with someone who can hurt you as bad as you can hurt them is neither cowardly or non consensual.

[@CB-pi5hc]

Agreed. America bombs nations daily and nobody cares, the only time they care is when theres a potential for THEM to get bombed back. When china moves a boat to another sea its all over the news, but when a group of children are killed nobody even notices.

[@waddwawadsdasad2339]

@@CB-pi5hc nato bombed my country illegaly back in 1999 serbia

[@CB-pi5hc]

@@waddwawadsdasad2339 sorry dude 😔

[@waddwawadsdasad2339]

@@CB-pi5hc nothing to be sorry brother, i dont blame anyone except the politicans involved in this

[@ajshiro3957]

Practicing sparring drills made me realize how fast i actually recover from an attack. It lasted only a few seconds. But the funniest part is nowing that not every strike is gonna hurt.

[@eIicit]

“Violence with a certain semblance of order, not chaotic violence.” I like it.

[@cassanateli]

lol

[@Shadowoftheoldones]

"Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies, we all feel the same so... WHY DON'T WE JUST ADMIT IT" - Maynard James Keenan This reminds me of your line about headbutts and how people are willing to watch them, but don't want to fight under that rule set.

[@fullcontactdownhillgymnast1992]

Good ol' Maynard. He could make a grocery list sound like poetry

[@momsbasementmma4842]

I’ve been training a long time. I decided years ago I wasn’t going to compete, I’m just not a very competitive person when it comes to sports. Winning was never super important to me. But I train for real life. Same reason I train with firearms. It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.

[@fullcontactdownhillgymnast1992]

You think you're not competitive!? I'm way less competitive than you are! No one is less competitive than me. I would totally win a competition of being least competitive

[@fullcontactdownhillgymnast1992]

Hoping you get the joke. I know humor doesn't translate well across different cultures

[@oskardahle2478]

@@fullcontactdownhillgymnast1992 Dude I don't think you had to explain the joke. It kinda puts a damper on in.

[@fullcontactdownhillgymnast1992]

@@oskardahle2478 Sarcasm is dead. Also you're putting a damper on my otherwise flawless comedic routine. You ruined everything

[@forrestjones2877]

I have used "On Killing" and its sister text "On Combat" (both by Lt.Col. Dave Grossman) in training for military personnel for years. Both provide great insights in the use of force, the psychology of violence, and human nature in confrontation.

[@restojon1]

I've personally felt this during training, but on my part it's because I'm aware that I'm a big guy and due to my inexperience I don't want to inadvertently "go too far" in a training environment. I know that I can cause serious harm to people because I've unfortunately done it in the past, the last thing I'd want to do is send someone home with an injury through my mistakes or lack of experience/expertise

[@knyghtkrawlr]

There's a difference between being reckless or unnecessarily rough and training realistically. It's valuable for your training partners to have someone bigger than them "attacking" them; within a safe and monitored environment. I go after the bigger guys cause i know they're the only ones that really can hurt me and i need to know how to realistically prevent that

[@bingsoo9559]

When fighting and inflicting “necesarry” harm, I just use the “This is just bussiness” ideology to temporarily close my heart out completely to my opponent

[@dacedebeer2697]

Yeah, and the other guy is there because he wants to be there too. He can walk away if that's a problem. I look at it that I'm willing to take as much punishment as I can deliver so I work with the premise that the other guy feels like he same way.

[@Mishkola]

This will sound horrible but I grew up on a farm and it was sometimes necessary to shoot a cat. I learned how to switch off my empathy and just do the job as efficiently as possible.

[@cesaralvesdemoraes3187]

@@Mishkola why did you need to do that?

[@RamseyDewey]

@Mishkola Yep. That’s another thing most city folks will never understand: controlling overpopulations of feral cats that kill everything they can. Cats don’t just kill for food, they kill for fun. One cat can kill 50 birds a day. For example, if you raise chickens, and you have a feral cat problem, you might not have any chickens left at the end of the week.

[@Mishkola]

@@cesaralvesdemoraes3187 Various reasons. Sometimes, like Ramsey said below your post, they were overpopulated and feral. Sometimes the tomcat that was so cuddly with humans had beating on everyone else as a hobby. Had a cat I loved a lot with an old injury that made her increasingly miserable. My point is that I like cats, but I felt I had to do it and I learned how to just do the job. I've never been in a cage but that mental ability might be useful if I do.

[@Muhammad-ou9wh]

You're better off confronting an experienced fighter than a rogue one, a true martial artist avoids conflict

[@ElDarlow]

I started boxing at 12. Had my first bout at 20 years old. I never thought I would get the itch to compete as I was happy enough sparring and preparing other guys for their bouts. It can be down to timing in life too, no-one needs to compete and fight if they don't love it and gyms should never pressure people in to fighting just because that's the 'normal' thing to do when someone is sparring and regularly training

[@DropTine987654321]

Cool background! I can admit that I love watching fights but don’t really want to get in a cage and fight. Best spectator sport on the planet though. Still, I don’t have a problem with someone who has an aversion to hitting another person. Most people can go their whole life without ever having to fight unless they want to. So…don’t. No shame in being a gentle soul.

[@sugelanren]

When someone says "I don't want to hurt you", they probably mean "I don't want you to hit me as hard as you want me to hit you"

[@marcusholbert2525]

It’s nice to know there are good people out there.

[@LgLegion]

My 2 cents: I train at an MMA gym that's known to go hard. I've sparred near 100 times. Before every one of them, i would say "hey let's go light". I have never been hurt, or hurt anyone in any of them. Even the ones where they didn't listen and still went hard. Yes, i've been tagged in the face, and done the same, and knocked each-other around a-little. But never once had an injury or pain that lasted more than a few minutes. I get injured alot more from other training methods actually lol. It's much harder to hurt someone who trains than people think. Unless you're going at them with murderous intent, you won't hurt them lol. I swear people think movies are real. (edit: But just to be clear, the key is that my intention was to go light and safe. If you go in to spar to cause injury that could very well happen.)

[@jonathonsayre4879]

Your videos and a few other channels have helped me become a lot better. I grew up gettin jumped and into fights but I was always heavier so I would throw other kids around but I couldn't strike worth a damn so it didn't go too well. I started watching you and Icy Mike when I was 15 and now the difference is night and day. I'm 19 now and my wrestling and boxing has improved such that I'm able to keep up with buddies of mine who were golden gloves. Now I'm training to be a marine and an mma fighter, and you and Gabriel vargas here on KZbin have been crazy essential for helping me understand the lifestyle and other ramifications of such a sport. I've come from 146lbs to 175lbs in 5months and have been sparring and bodybuilding religiously. Next step is to go pay for a dojo membership at a decent fight gym and try to learn all I can. Hopefully if I'm decent enough I can start amateur in a few months. Thanks so much for your insights and videos.

[@RamseyDewey]

Fantastic! Great to hear that you got out there and trained! Hard work pays off.

[@jonathonsayre4879]

@@RamseyDewey no problem. God willing you'll see at least a regional champ outta me, too inexperienced and humble to say otherwise

[@attiylanen]

You just explained beautifully the difference between a traditional martial artist and a fighter.

[@cdarklock]

As my sensei used to say, "if you're not a masochist already, by the time you reach black belt... you will be." If you're truly, honestly GOOD at fighting - not martial arts, but fighting - you legitimately LIKE it when you get in the ring with someone and they rock your shit. Because for the first few years, you get your shit rocked a lot, and then you get to a point where most of the people in your dojo are not rocking your shit because they're afraid of you rocking THEIR shit. So you have to sigh and scale it back a little and go to light contact or touch control because you know they don't want their shit rocked. And when you finally get in the ring with someone who's a FIGHTER, and you look in their eyes and see that intensity, and you test them a little and they land something solid... well, that grin comes over your face, because now you get to open 'er up and see what she can do. Playtime is over. You can go to WORK.

[@mixck]

Martial artist who loves to train and spar but does not fight here 🖐🏻 And loves every minute of it.

[@bennagel2180]

I like Ramsey Dewey

[@robertblockbusterrowe3351]

Legend has it, one person watched the video upside down and liked it.

[@666alikat]

3:00 thats the kind of shit you say to someone right before you get knocked the fuck out

[@makaiev]

Consensual violence is completely different than raw violence...

[@stt1976]

There is also the lovely variation that I just got 3 days ago when my friend asked me to show her why a duck under to take the back works and that the only way to stop one was to learn how to grapple. "That only worked because I did not want to hurt you, while you were doing that I had to stop myself from elbowing you" So I told her to go ahead, elbow, bite kick whatever, and when that failed, the insistence was still that she could not go all out to hurt me and if it happened "in real life" she would not hold back and simply elbow, back kick, stomp etc anyone trying to do that. It seems that women are just as capable as men of believing they are much better at striking someone effectively than they actually are.

[@Benn635]

Can you commentate on the type of athletic outlier Khamzat Chimiev is after his most recent performance, specifically given your experience training with Li. Thanks mate love your content!

[@RamseyDewey]

Yep. I’m planning on it.

[@MrOldboy360]

But I'll hurt you, Ram Dew...HaHaHaJaJaJa!!!

[@dantouzeau6985]

3:02 Sigma Ramsey 😂

[@ihbarddx]

I used to tend bar in establishments that had no bouncers. If someone started trouble, I had to intervene. Troublemakers might be barred from a specific establishment, but I worked several. That is, the guy I'm fighting tonight, I might be serving timorrow. My background was wrestling. The moves, there, are designed to control, rather than to harm. If things went well, I could hold someone down while the barmaid went out and found a cop on the ave. If things didn't...

[@achkidding1762]

Question: Any idea why there are no "team fights" in MMA, for example 2 on 2 or even larger teams? Happens in show wrestling and - to my knowledge - some HEMA, too. Not that I miss it but it would add even a bit more "realism" to MMA. Having teams fight each other seemed to be no unusual concept in the olden days, if history books are any source to go by.

[@RamseyDewey]

Team Fighting Championship (5 vs 5 MMA) was a thing in Poland and Russia. Why don’t you see it more? Athletic commissions usually don’t approve it. The fights are very short (less than a minute) and hard to market. Anyone can put on a fight event, very people can make you care about it enough to make it commercially viable.

[@ajshiro3957]

2 on 2 matches would be cool. Like a real life Tekken Tag match

[@Mojkanal1234]

Even though there are the same number of people in both teams it seems inherently unfair, at some point (possibly few seconds) there will be multiple people on one person, imagine wrestling somebody and another guy starts striking your head, you'd be done in few seconds. You could regulate that but then it wouldn't be MMA or it wouldn't be team fight rather bunch of 1v1's

[@achkidding1762]

@@Mojkanal1234 Unfair? No, not as long as the rules are known to all participants beforehand. Training, techniques and tactics would surely require adaptation and thus change the game (and the show). It's just adding another component, like adding full contact to point competition. Question is what kind of MMA would be the result. But since many MMA fans pride themselves with "realism in fighting", well, there you go. However, as the Coach already stated: Money is the eternal driver. If the development of computer games is any scale to go by then we can just wait for the team fights to come in the not-so-far future. Just compare the ego-shooters from the last decades with the current armchair warriors. Tendency obvious, just looking for a sound commercial concept now …

[@lucascastro2802]

Imo, too unpredictable to be safe. No way a ref could manage to watch as 4 people jump at each other, someone goes to the ground and gets the back of their head hammered in with punches... No big fighter would run that risk either.

[@emmanuelprado]

Thank you so much for tackling my question, coach! That last line really resonated. I believe I'll keep training for my personal improvement rather than competing (which I felt compelled to do because it's a sport, right?). I'll try to look at it the way I look at soccer. Thanks so much.

[@jeffreywright2294]

You said it better than anyone coach

[@ThanksGuy01]

Great vid mate🤙

[@Felipe-pn1mn]

lets go ... we all got this

[@austinwinston684]

We get hurt in training all the time! Usually it's not even while we're doing moves on each other.

[@grigoreureche345]

It is called CONSCIENCE ,Ramsey! Simple as that.

[@scarmich214]

Great information, love the way you break this stuff down. And that background looks awesome!

[@redbeardmate]

I want to compete with headbuts! 😂

[@Stazzo82]

In any case the 90% of martial arts classes, don't make any kind of contact...

[@TeslaDRay]

One of the most intelligent and refreshing personalities i ever heard in a long time.

[@robcharters2645]

That's how you start a real fight,insult someone and provoke them into rage charging you,ring and mats different universe than u filtered,unrulled reality

[@Architectofawesome]

People don't understand how tanky people who work out are. Me and my buddy are both chunky guys and we would spar on the grass outside and the biggest difficulty was always how to finish the round. That is because you get tired and you only have so many powerful enough tries to finish. Of course, we didn't hurt each other the match would end when one of us even has a chance to get something in that we would consider a finishing blow(the rest was free sparing so you can punch however hard you want, kick whatever) or if you tap out from something it ends. For example, if you get behind the other and have a chance to hit them with your full strength to the back of the head you would tap the other in the exact way you were intending to hit them to signal it and that would be that. This way we could do more sparing matches even though we wouldn't actually be able to finish any of them after let's say 3rd match, simply because we wouldn't have enough power to do it unless you literally lay down on the other guy and choke him out, but that is not how our matches would end for the most part because we were both more of hitters than grapplers. It would still happen from time to time. And even so a lot of the time we would have to settle by just admitting who had the edge in the match because we couldn't get to that decisive finish.

[@adcyuumi]

Interesting direction your channel is taking, Ramsey; Just one person's opinion here, but I like the engagement. When I was a young man, I studied several martial arts and was physically capable. Then I injured myself twice; first my hip, then my back. I lost most of my physical capability, and now I see/approach martial arts differently. I look for how the woman caught alone in the parking lot might try to fight back, how the old man limping down the street might fare, what I might do when my left arm is in a sling. You are (were?) a sport fighter. You stay in excellent physical condition. You know how to fight other fighters, in a ring/cage where there are rules but a particularly capable adversary. But in the middle of a fight... it's easy to get hurt. Maybe you sprain your wrist a little with a bad punch. Maybe your shoulder begins to spasm. Maybe that third or fourth leg kick is starting to work. You aren't unfamiliar with the same considerations that I make when thinking about martial arts and deciding what to practice (because a person only has so much time and must choose). My question to you is this -- Given various injuries that you know (ones that don't stop the fight), how do you adjust tactics for each one when stuck in a fight you cannot escape? This seems to be something useful for the ring/cage, and I've not seen you (or anyone for that matter) ever do a video on it. I think you could be the man for the job here.

[@KursRage]

Great topic! I am one of those martial artists who never wanted to hurt anyone. The more that you learn about martial arts and the fragility of the human body, the less that you would ever want to do it.

[@Raysting511]

Was honestly about to bring up “On Killing” you beat me to it

[@danielkjh8]

i just wanna learn how to fight because i find it fun, i don't wanna go out of my way to hurt anyone. i'm fine fighting someone if I have to which isn't really a common thing for me anyway. i just like being prepared

[@Legalnamejeff]

When i first started sparring i landed a big shot on my friend and i asked him if he was fine to which my coaches started screaming to keep going

[@graceforged84]

That privacy background is dope!

[@lauramumma2360]

Good points. I try to communicate for mutual safety in practice.

[@jakubslavik5595]

That reminds me of myself, I had spent about 5-6 years training Krav maga and then I eventually started training by myself, mostly weight lifting and some boxing here and there. It's not that I want to fight or that I like the idea of being able to hurt others, it's more about me feeling good, getting better at things and being able to not to fight, if you know what I mean.

[@Taekwon-Brando]

Great video Ramsey! I personally can’t compete in any MMA/kickboxing/boxing fights for a long time due to a head injury which is why I’ve been focusing on BJJ and judo so much recently, I find it’s a lot easier on the old noggin.

[@cesaralvesdemoraes3187]

Sure is. Watch out for the back tho

[@Taekwon-Brando]

@@cesaralvesdemoraes3187 you’re absolutely right man, especially since I already have back problems hahah

[@user-ws5ft8xo1z]

That's a really sick background!

[@Kirian_Roig_I]

That's an interesting way to point it out. I struggle when doing joint locking techniques to my teammates, because I always think I don't want to hurt you. But there's another layer behind that truth. And that is, do you have the CONTROL and skill to stop and put the exact pressure? If you need to use extra body/muscular strenght because your skill is not enough, then there is risk of injuring your partner, so, if you are afraid of hurting your partner, that is, probably, because you don't have enough control and/or skill and need to experience more, step by step. That is just an idea I just come with. Cheers!

[@SerafRhayn]

No, I think you’re actually on to something here. I’ve been doing judo for a year now and the first time I hurt a classmate, his ankle sprained when I threw him with Tani Otoshi. After that I went a few weeks refraining from ever using it because “I don’t want to hurt anyone.” Since then, I’ve taken time to practice it and that classmate and I still train together

[@Kirian_Roig_I]

Glad to know he's practicing with you! :)

[@makenjikarate]

Very true, people like to see the violence but will never actually want to be in it themselves, plus it's imagine headbutts would shorten fighters careers and ruin the rest of their life too

[@RamseyDewey]

Every cut over my eyes I have ever had was from headbutts. It’s a great way to make a fight messy, short, boring, and anticlimactic, and ensure 100% that both guys need stitches and testing for blood born diseases afterward.

[@dannooooooo]

the guilt of hurting people almost never came up for me because we all agreed to what we were doing and it was just a biproduct of the activity, but not the goal. the goal was to win and out thinking your competitor, like chess or any other game, and in the moment you dont feel most of the damage until after. There was also such a family love atmosphere between most guys and we were all just trying to get better. i would feel bad if i caught a sparring partner and dropped them though, because you dont want it to go like that. your in the moment, setting something up, then bang you catch them and feel such conflicting emotions, one where your super proud that you figured out this plan on the fly and it worked perfectly, but another where you just did this to someone you are probably quite close with, and you know you not only hurt them physically but almost worse, you damaged their mental game. My gym didn't train great though and we now know it was the wrong way. Sidenote on headbutts (lol) I started out sparring with lethwei (or muay boran, which had a limited ground game). they are good to know in the 1 in a million chance your in a life a death situation that using your hands can get you out of. but for competing id never want headbutts. i mean, its a savage weapon and props to guys who compete in lethwei, but i got way to many headaches. it has to be terrible for you. and when you headbutt each other at the same time omg, it sucks and everything smells like a musty basement.. no wonder my memory is terrible.

[@israelwolstein9351]

I definitely would participate if headbutts were legal just like they were legal for thousands of early MMA , Vale Tudo , NHB . It's still legal in some countries.

[@eIicit]

Sweet backdrop

[@klaytrix7943]

When talking off the cuff turns into a Tool song.

[@tye3ow]

as an LP with plenty of hands on experience, I can tell you that headbutts aren't that bad in contrast to, say, getting elbowed. they're not that bad as compared to tearing someone's arm out of their shoulder, dropping them on their head, or overextending their kneecap until it bends. they're not that bad as compared to cranking someone's neck out of position. the difference is that headbutts are an immediate display of violence and usually involve the other person's face, which contains the thinnest skin, and bleeds a lot. a headbutt is certainly less violent than a head kick, but the display of violence is more, so people think it's icky.

[@bodyno3158]

When you were facing those "nice ladies" who doesn't want to hurt you and you were trying to talk them down, it's never about "let them realize the reality of they can't hurt you". You were "fighting" another big "something" inside their world with words, that "something", that symbolic being, is always commanding them to follow a series of rules that fits (their) concept of "woman" (with return ofcourse, like emotional tantrum is allowed), when they said "I don't want to hurt you!", they were actually saying "I don't want that 'big something' to hurt me!". Too bad we can't simply choke out rules and commands, but you got a simliar symbolic buddy on your side: the rules and presets of "ritual fights“ (like "holding back is the biggest insult to your opponent", or just the atmosphere of the gym), he can knock out their "something", then those ladies would start throwing punches like they should. The victory is not yours nor theirs, but it's the first step, a human must need some "source material" to reflect on the topic of violence, then they would have a chance to realize what chained them back for so long: the "good woman don't hurt people" mindset is a form of symbolic violence, and it's much, much more sinister than leaving a few bruises on your spar partner.

[@Xplora213]

I agree that it is subconscious but I think a new person might have unrealistic opinions about their ability to hurt someone. If I’m wrestling my kids I am very concerned about getting hit in the face or my nuts because they lack the presence of mind to avoid major damage 😂 But you don’t invite a kick to the balls unprepared in a class. I think more likely is that this girl has been given a fake story about gender equality and hasn’t ever tried to punch a grown man (let alone a former pro fighter). I don’t go full blast wrestling my kids because that’s not fun for them, is it? But they aren’t under an illusion that they are competitive. I can’t escalate without risking their injury or getting kicked in the balls so they aren’t really winning, are they? Same with this lady. Maybe she thinks she is competitive but doesn’t understand that she hasn’t actually met actual resistance? Maybe her boyfriend couldn’t go to 9000 without taking out her teeth? So she thought she was actually strong? Delusion is a big deal. I don’t think she had visions of being too ladylike if she’s in an MMA gym.

[@bodyno3158]

@@Xplora213 The core of my reply is "I don't want to hurt you!" = "I don't want that 'something' to hurt me!". A MMA gym is a threshold space where they have to face the "ladylike" mindset that's solidified into their mind no matter how they think what a "cool girl" they are, it's usually the first space they get a first taste of how violence is (albeit ritually), and how it feels to deliver and receive violence, that is also the first step to get rid of the market-constructed "cool girl" delusion. That "cool girl" delusion is not gender equality... There's "girl" still in it, still a strong "feminine" command, so still "ladylike".

[@jonathanlochridge9462]

Yeah, the kind of ruleset you would be willing to fight under is important. I am not personally really sure. Headbuts seem pretty dangerous but I don't know exactly how much more risky they are than other forms of head impacts. But, I did swordfighting and wrestled a bit with a lot of my relatives as a kid. (And kept doing swordfighting as hema as an adult.) And I have hurt people a couple times in fighting or even play-fighting. But I haven't ever gone into a situation with an intent to really hurt someone. Knock someone down, pin them...sure. I was a decently violent kid but not extremely so. I wasn't a bully or anything. But I was a bit troubled. Although, overtime in someways my convictions against killing or lethal actions against humans. I have fished and slaughtered animals for meat before. Although with the chicken example, plucking out the feathers is extremely difficult. Would much rather kill a rabbit personally. I kind of agree with you there. Particularly with the bit about not wanting baggage. I kind of think there is a dark part of most people to some degree. And coming to terms with it, is enlightening. But, Serious violence changes people. And the guilt and hardening that could come from actually hurting someone seriously, much less killing someone would be very terrible. At least it seems there was a bit impact on the family members I know who were shaped by it.

[@afonsomendes6907]

this background gives me acute anxiety for some reason. Another awsome video as always coach

[@azzlingtonmcazzle9544]

Another KZbinr, Lindybeige, discussed similar psychological barriers to soldiers killing in war, made the point that many modern soldiers are trained to shoot almost reflexively, by which I mean there's no great deal of thought behind the push of their weapon into the trigger (not sure if it's the correct word here, but want to try and make myself understood), however there are major psychological ramifications when they return home after war, as it's inherently against our nature to kill each other.

[@cesaralvesdemoraes3187]

Love that dude, awesome content just like ramseu

[@JR-sz7dw]

I read a book called Meditations on violence. It’s about a man who has spent his life in violent jobs. Swat, prison guard, military etc. He explains how he also practiced MMa. Long story short... violence happens in much different ways than people expect and what kind of person you are and what you eat that morning has much more of an effect on the outcome than if you know martial arts or not. Think of Martial arts as a form of meditation to help stay in shape and release tension. If you want to fight... train to fight. It’s more important you keep a focused and clear mind to make the best decisions.

[@JR-sz7dw]

@@CharmingMountain I cant remember the name of the writer. It was awhile ago. The book is called Meditations on Violence. He talks about three different types of people in violent situations. To sum them up... Ones who freeze, ones who rage, ones who become calm. He explains the the different mannerisms and facial expressions they typically display. He explains what you ate earlier that day will determine a lot about how you react and how well you perform. He does explain how his years of training and experience has helped him to remain calm but hes never actually used martial arts like it is taught in class. Most situations are by suprise and people dont typically react how they think they will. Even training for years when one is faced with a new experience, real violence, your brain still has to process what is going on and what type of person you are usually determines how you will react. Food is obviously important for energy output, but it also effects how focused/alert we are among other things. People think because they train martial arts they will be better at defending themselves... in most situations, unless its a mutual fight... this is not the case. The outcome will be determined on what kind of person you are and what you ate that day. Unless you are experienced in violent situations, your fighting ability really wont matter too much. In fact, it might even get you into a worse situation when you could have escaped or made a better choice rather than to fight head on. A street fight can be a mutual fight maybe in the hood. Like a brawl. Most people dont just randonly get dragged into street fights. Its usually by suprise because you were acting like a victim and not paying attention. I could go on. Its an interesting book.

[@dudeman9868]

Hey ramsey I like the new background

[@TaijDevon]

You are referring to Lt Colonel Grossman's 'On Killing' which is optional reading in the Military, but I think it should be required reading. If you are not a psychopath, it is not you getting shot at that damages you psychologically. Firefighters don't often get PTSD. It can sometimes be seeing a buddy or buddy get killed or wounded. But the most likely cause is you killed someone. No matter how tough minded you think you are, unless you are truly evil, kllling someone has a high probability of causing you psychological damage, even in self defense. Because you are a decent human being. And the closer range the more likely it is. Pressing a button to launch a missile is a whole lot different from stabbing someone in the eye. Although the results are the same. Recommended reading for anyone who thinks soberly about violence.

[@willjohn1117]

Great outro coach

[@Sumtrip799]

physical chess

[@Sk0lzky]

I'd argue being a piece of shit to a coworker hurts him more than beating the living crap out of someone in the cage lol

[@AJxXxstyles]

Questions for the next q&a with the coach? Genuine curiosity, what is your favorite food(s)? Any favorite dessert(s)? Dog or Cat? And I'm digging the new background btw. Not that I didn't like the old one... switching them up a bit every now and then might be nice. Luv from yours truly Calgary, AB, Canada 🇨🇦

[@RamseyDewey]

I don’t have a favorite food. I rarely eat deserts. I don’t eat cats and dogs.

[@AJxXxstyles]

@@RamseyDewey XD I meant which animal do you like better (not for eating lool), guess I should've been clearer. Maybe something you enjoy eating? Anything in general or specific

[@DrOrr]

@@RamseyDewey how u stay disciplined w not eating sweets

[@cesaralvesdemoraes3187]

@@DrOrr after some months you don't really miss it anymore

[@eddard9442]

I feel like i missed out by not growing up on a farm and doing things city folk would be afraid/disgusted to do.

[@RamseyDewey]

Well… you did! Here’s what you missed out on: work.

[@ozellwells6582]

Preach

[@angusmcmungachuck3667]

I've taken up boxing again after a 22 year hiatus and my sparring experience is pretty negligible but in my recent sessions I immediately take a big ol' step back everytime I land something. I outweigh most of my partners by a fair bit so I try and concentrate on defense more than offence. I don't want to come out on top just by virtue of being bigger I guess, what would I learn? Probably not much. Long story short, I understand not wanting to hurt someone in the ring. Once they throw me in with a heavier dude I'm sure I'll start unloading a bit more but for now I'm happy to try and get hit less. Hope this helps, reasonably sure it doesn't 🤣

[@jezwarren-clarke2471]

hi Ramsey, not question but i just want to share as you inspire me to "get and train".. i took my young daughter to her first BJJ class yesterday and straight after i took my first class too. we both had a great time and ache a bit this afternoon (but not to much). ive kickboxed for a couple of years now, and even now, (although i only do light sparring) when sparring i still have to put my mind in slightly different place before i can punch my partner in the face..

[@justoldog]

You have to be careful while practicing. I was playing with a man a while back picking off punches, and I accidentally broke his wrist. Practice with care.

[@Ricardo7250]

Argh, this background freaks me out 😂. But keep up the great work

[@KelpWolf]

When I was in my late teens, I was not training, but liked to wrestle/rough-house with my friends. . . but I frequently would accidentally hurt them. No major injuries. It kinda stuck with me though. I'm quite shy of using full speed or full strength in sparring and probably try too hard to pull my strikes. . .

[@chrisswanson2378]

Valid points. I learned from SCA you can hit so hard that with an axe you can cut an oak tree down but not bother a helmed person with a ratton blade. People do not realise how force is distributed. In fencing a metal cup for breasts is pocked with damage. The body is not. My first lesson is about force and how it manifests.

[@tessasense2584]

I would love the chance to spar with you. Or at least attend one of your classes.

[@astonprice-lockhart7261]

People don't understand the difference between practicing violence and committing violent acts. Which makes sense as a lot of people are realizing how to spar playfully and that sparring is not a fight.

[@szepi79]

martial art instructor here: I call it "controlled violence". because as soon as there is a need to stop (like the excersize / round is over), the violence stops just like a snap. edit: typos

[@threatassessment216]

First rule in the UFC is I’d make sure the fights aren’t fixed as they clearly have been since the UFC was sold to an entertainment And talent franchise

[@nobodyaltyt103]

I’ve said this before in a street fight but it’s only because my opponent was much smaller than me and untrained and I knew it wasn’t a fair fight

[@johnrambo4259]

Couch I just started American juijitsu/ mma gym. I was wanting to side train with this judoka at that gym just a little and also try some judo moves out there. My question is what things will rub bjj people the wrong way when sparring/ practicing moves.

[@dariusjousdani5768]

Hey Ramsey I have a question about your fighters. When you prepare them for a fight, do you let them spar hard? And do you think someone can get bad habits from light sparring? Best wishes from Germany

[@Stormcloakvictory]

Tool - vicarious

[@GuitarsRockForever]

Coach, any comment on the UFC results? What do you think the way how Li lost? I'm happy to see Glover winning the light-heavyweight champion.

[@Oguyaka.]

My previous coaches carry a lot of these philosophies; I suppose that means I had good help 🙂 I had a Kru Tosu, A Fighting teacher in Muay Thai who always told us, "You come to gym to practice! You no have to beat everybody up..!" Hahah!

[@imawarrior313]

The main goal of learning martial arts is not to need to use them.

[@twistedmettle5366]

I don't like to fight either, but I do enjoy sparring. How else am I gonna know i can actually do the thing i've been practicing?

[@aaronyhlee1386]

Good day Coach, pardon this really long comment, but I wonder if you would like to share your opinion on how I should approach sparring with this one training partner of mine next week. We are both first-trimester university freshmen, currently training at our university’s kickboxing club once a week, and we sparred for the first time at our 3rd training since we joined (faced a month-long disruption due to COVID-19 restrictions). Prior to this, I trained MMA (striking is mostly Muay Thai & boxing) for 1.5 years (and taekwondo until my green belt, before that), whereas he trained in karate and taekwondo, holding black belts in both. At our club, we train in Sanda, but no grappling is allowed for now due to lack of mat size as per COVID restrictions. We do spar lightly (but still wearing mouthpieces) at the end of training (at about 9.30pm) as most of us have classes the next day (in fact I had an exam the next day). He’s about 2-2.5 inches shorter than me, but certainly 50-60 pounds heavier. He does not have a mouthpiece, so all the more we should go lightly when sparring . But instead of going light at all, he kicked me multiple times with full force (spinning and exhaling as hard and fast as he could) in the ribs at unexpected close ranges, plus a full force spinning hook kick to my face (also unexpectedly close range), rocking my whole skull and leaving a bruise next to my eye socket (he is much heavier than me as mentioned, with enormous legs). He then said sorry for the head kick, although I don’t think he meant that kick for the body as he’s clearly shorter than me (also, every other training partner there I’ve had is taller than him, and none have used head kicks in sparring, even though they all tend to kick more than they punch). I would like to ask for your opinion, on whether he’s in any wrong, whether he’s going too hard and should be going lighter, whether I should tell him that next training, or not spar with him, or go just as hard on him (esp in boxing and clinch exchanges where I scored the most). I hope this is not too long to read, I do apologise for its length, and I would really appreciate if you do give it a read and give your thoughts on it. Thank you very much for your time and effort, Coach.

[@casperthegst]

Ramsey what do you do for your personal training since you have retired from competition? Do you just lift and maybe hit the heavy bag/grapple or are you actually doing light sparring with students?

[@RamseyDewey]

I train at least 3 times a day: one session of strength and conditioning, one open mat or open sparring session, and at least one group class (technique and sparring).

[@danielhounshell2526]

I've always personally believed that if you choose to take part in martial arts, holding back on someone because you're afraid to hurt them is one of the most insulting things that you can do. They train so that they can intelligently defend themselves, so having someone do this is just demeaning to all of the effort they've put in to stand in the ring with you.

[@User-54631]

Fighter and martial artist are not the same thing. Bruce Lee is a good example. Great martial artist, 0-0 fight record.

[@harlequincat]

If there is no need to kill, why kill? That goes for your food as well. If there is no need to kill your food, don't.

[@RamseyDewey]

Show the world a way to produce food without killing anything, and you will go down in history as a legend. In the meantime, I strongly suggest you visit a farm sometime and learn where crops come from.

[@DreadTeamLeader]

“I can clap you with my level 1083 android ki build” **doesnt**

[@Karvega11]

The only fights I've ever gotten were street fights and I'm afraid to fight because I think I would accidently or purposely kill them. So much pent up anger and hatred.

[@cahallo5964]

it doesn't happen, if you get blinded by anger fighting an actual fighter you'l look like a toddler trying to hit his dad. That thought of yours is delusional and believe it or not most men had it.

[@Karvega11]

@@cahallo5964 What if he's not a trained fighter. I gotten beating up by guys and have teeth knocked out, broken noses, broken ribs, concussions. You not as hard to die as you think.

[@cahallo5964]

​@@Karvega11 I mean, if you kill someone in the ring/cage as long as you don't disobey the referee you are literally doing nothing wrong. Also I have no clue what you just said why would you kill a random dude for no reason?, and if it's to defend your life then why are you afraid?

[@Karvega11]

@@cahallo5964 There have been streetfights where I have come close to killing people and vice versa due to my temper and I blackout.

[@yv3970]

hey coach I have a question, I'm still in school and because of that I cant go to a mma/boxing gym, I've wanted to start for 2 years but due to school and lockdown I cant, but I do have a bag at home and want to do some practice but am worried about learning the wrong thing and developing bad habits, so the gist is, should i start off on some basics from KZbin or wait till I join a gym, if i do start what are some good channels for basics , by the way I've never trained in martial arts or combat sports before

[@RamseyDewey]

There’s no better time to start then now!

[@jordypierce57]

hey coach love your work, i have a question so i learn this technique in muay thai where you push your opponent with both your hand than immediately kick them in head, leg or body. i have tried in a match and it’s very effective, question is why i have never seen this technique in mma pro fight?

[@RamseyDewey]

You have to understand the divergent goals of the two different sports at that range of combat. If you are close enough to push the other fighter with two hands in a Muay Thai fight, you’re fighting from inside the pocket. There’s no threat of a level change or takedown here. In MMA, this is not true. It’s very rare to see fighters striking at all from inside the pocket since this is grappling range in MMA where the primary goals become initiate and defend takedowns.

[@jordypierce57]

@@RamseyDewey wow ok i understand it now, thank you for your time and explanation coach.

[@tyy123]

I will tell you a short story: I have been training wrestling Bjj and boxing regularly for the last three years and I love it, one daY I got road rage 😡 thing with another guy, and he kept on tailgating me until I stoped, I got of my car thinking 🤔 let’s teach this man some manners, the moment I looked at his car I saw 👀 his daughter looking from the window I decided that if he doesn’t throw the first punch 🤜, I’m not hurting him in front of his family, he kept on yelling, I put a plan ( faint then a double leg take down where I will smack his head on the concrete, it was cold ( Canada 🇨🇦). But I said his family is not gonna see that unless he touches me. Thank god he went back in his car. I love martial arts, can’t live without them, but we (humans) tend to hate violence.

[@AJxXxstyles]

Regarding self defense, how far do you think we should go, or go about it, in a way where we can successfully (at least in attempt to) defend ourselves but not get into trouble (at least minimize it) with the law enforcement/law? Any thought(s) on this?

[@RamseyDewey]

That depends entirely on the laws where you live. Self defense is a legal term for justifying violence that would otherwise be illegal.

[@Xplora213]

In today’s world, you need to ask a lawyer - some countries will convict you of assault if you even hurt someone invading your home. Bear in mind, these countries are also batshit crazy (I’m talking about Britain) because they’re denying the basic animal urges to defend your territory and create an absurd standard of behaviour for law abiding citizens. Each country will be different.

[@philsayer2447]

Coach Dewey I've got a question: I REALLY want to visit China, or even hopefully work there. I really love Chinese culture, history and philosophy. I don't know if I'm qualified to call myself "a Daoist" but Daoism is what I practise and believe. For the past year I've been learning Mandarin - my reading is getting pretty good but my speaking/listening isn't very good yet. What I'm worried about though is this rule that you can be culpable for someone's medical bills and get sued if you help someone at the scene of an accident; and if you get involved if you see an injustice on the street like a woman getting verbally or physically assaulted then you are probably not going to be treated favourably and can go to prison for it. The reason I'm worried is because I'm someone who can't help themselves from getting involved if I see an injustice happening or someone in danger, and I can't stop myself from giving someone assistance if they're injured or they have an accident. It's just instinct for me, it's how I was raised by my father (who I saw step in to help or defend strangers when I was a kid and who worked as a paramedic for over 25 years) and it's my moral code, as well as a compulsion. I know couldn't live with myself if I didn't step in to help and the few times I didn't do it when I was a teenager still really bother me and I find myself ruminating on them sometimes. How do I reconcile these two things: my need/compulsion to step in and help people with my deep desire to visit, or hopefully even live in, Zhong Guo/China? Any advice would mean the world to me. It's the only thing stopping me from doing it and it's been my dream to see or live in China since I was a kid - I had read the four classics by the age of 14 and the five Confucian classics by the age of 18. Please Ramsey I need your knowledge "For The Streetz". Thanks, you're a legend & I'm a longtime fan of your channel. All the best to you.

[@philsayer2447]

Sorry for copying & pasting this here as well as under your comment about questions - I wasn't sure which one was the best way to help you see it. My apologies & my thanks.

[@RamseyDewey]

Hi Phil. It sounds like you heard some news of an incident from over a decade ago of the guy who tried to extort the Good Samaritan that helped him. I wouldn’t even worry about that a little bit. Here’s one of the most important things I learned from living in China vs before I came here: everything you think you know about China is wrong.

[@philsayer2447]

@@RamseyDewey Thank you so so so much for replying. Getting an answer on this really seriously means the world to me. I'm so relieved it's not something to worry about and that you can step in to help people without unreasonable fear of ramifications. I wasn't too aware of any particular cases in any detail, I just knew it was a possibility there and I didn't know how much to be concerned. I watched this video after your video on "Loud & Obnoxious is the new tough" (which is a statement I couldn't agree with more - here in the UK the post-war London Gangster scene that my Grandad was around as a boxing promoter & someone who owned a lot of market stalls, apparently all those guys, who were really scary & dangerous people, would be extremely polite, wouldn't swear infront of women, wouldn't raise their voice when they were angry because it showed too much emotion & lack of control and were often proud fathers who doted on their kids) and in that video you mentioned about people not wanting to get involved in China because of it potentially costing them a lot of money - so it seemed like an obvious question to ask. I guess the money I've saved is definitely going to be used to see China now!! Thanks so much Mr. Dewey it really does mean the world to me. Thanks.