Calming the Pain, Not Avoiding It

[@deni8688]

Discovering this thinking in 2025. Wow. The world needs this! I am in tears with peace and compassion because this is resonating with the soul. Thank you. I'm making my way through all your talks. 🙏🏽

[@loganbrown9845]

I’ve gotten to the point where no one and nothing speaks more truly to my experience than you and your associate monk’s words. Thank you for continuing to make these teachings free.

[@cliffmilbrun2803]

Same here. At this point I need jhana clarification.

[@bsways]

I would be careful of that. Sounds like a cult mentality

[@bsways]

​@@cliffmilbrun2803 I experienced 1st jhana completely by accident on my first retreat. Probably because I had zero expectations or preconceived ideas. Once you start wanting it you can forget it. I really don't think reading and learning too much is helpful. The Buddha did not read books or watch videos. It's unnecessary. It can be helpful but if you do it too much or too obsessively it's just more distraction. You won't become enlightened by learning the dhamma in a scholarly way like a university course.

[@ahmedzaki72]

Sadhu 🙏 Sadhu 🙏 Sadhu 🙏 , Ahmed from Egypt, I've learned a LOT from your Dhamma talks, thanks Bhante 🙏 for your efforts 🙏 Sadhu 🙏 Sadhu 🙏

[@fujispirit]

Sadhu sadhu sadhu 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 Thank you so much

[@dassavilokantara439]

Great discussion on a multifaceted aspect of the practice. It is good to also recall and reflect on Ānanda’s specific situation. The subtle dangers of incomplete insight into the immutable nature of conditioned reality (dhamma). He delighted here and there in the beauty of Right View, his proximity to the Tathāgata, and his progress stalled as a result for 25 years. In other words - don’t let The Dhamma itself become a vehicle for distraction. The dangers, indeed, are many!

[@alecogden12345]

One of the best videos, Bhantes 🙏

[@flowersarelovesome]

If I understand correctly: If you meditate with expectation, you reinforce the notion of "outside" and you bind yourself to the senses and to the world. If you withdraw from the world and compose yourself internally, enduring pain without any expectation of pleasure, you disentangle your self from the limiting force of passion and desire. You can't run toward pleasure and you can't run away from pain if you want to unbind yourself from the possibility of dukkha. "When I pushed forward, I was whirled about. When I stood still, I was swept under. And so I crossed over the flood by not pushing forward and by not standing still." -- Lord Buddha

[@theinngu5560]

Sadhu sadhu sadhu 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼Brilliant…thanks so much for uploading.

[@vinivida444]

Pure dhamma ☘️🍃🙏

[@Max11551]

A crystal clear explanation of the motivation behind sīla. Thank you for sharing these Dhamma lessons.

[@fernandoorozco5968]

Thank you

[@atozdhamma4248]

Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu. Meditating for better sensuality, what a beautiful explanation of most of our common error. This is not what expected for liberation of suffering for sure. It will be more suffering, when a day you couldn't feel expected sensuality, which you call it as a "calm mind". Without a calm mind, you won't be able to build up a right view, that is why we need meditation, not for build up to Jhana.

[@shelinahetherington4661]

Brilliant talk. So helpful. Thank you both 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@sonamtsheringlepchalepcha8218]

Thank u.

[@lifeofslice9864]

Sadhu sadhu sadhu

[@prabathvijayantha8414]

🙏🙏🙏

[@TheDeepening718]

Mahishasur's army represents passions. The passions are slain when Durga, who is the Truth, arrives on the battlefield and reveals herself.

[@user-tx5zl1ub7p]

Hello teacher, thank you for your teaching. Since I have wrong understanding, could you tell me if it’s wise to develop to mindfulness context of the body, even though my sense restraint is not developed? The reason is that in everyday life, I get absorbed in the sense and cannot remember to do proper restraint. Having understood context of the body, it will become an anchor and I will be able to fully restraint myself.

[@HillsideHermitage]

Correct mindfulness comes out of the sense restraint, not other way around. So if you are struggling in restraining yourself you need to spend more time thinking about the dangers of getting absorbed in the senses. Then you will be properly anchored.

[@hariharry391]

🙏

[@harryk812]

Venerable sir, practicing non action to calm the pressure of distraction. How could we differentiate that from laziness and procrastination? Because sometimes I feel pressured not to do something, but I don’t because that would cause distraction.

[@HillsideHermitage]

Loss of mindfulness is what causes distraction, not doing of your duties. If what you are pressured to do is not sensuality or ill will or entertainment, then do it mindfully and you will not be distracted.

[@harryk812]

​@@HillsideHermitage Thank you very much. For the past two days, I have been suffering to a great extent. The reason is my sense of ownership and control in external factors that cannot be owned. I have to decided what career to choose while in college. The only thing I am factoring for my career is helping people and being generous. However, still the idea, " what should I do for my future?" has been very painful.

[@medalxx12]

Is there a video regarding the “ process “ or “sequence” of attachment and dependance ? Why does the mind attach more strongly for example to one person as opposed to another ? Such as in a romantic relationship . How can i understand why one ending is just a sting and able to be moved past , however another may become agonizing grief, fixation , obsession , and very unstable desperate behavior . What is this difference here ? This is personal as since the end of said relationship . i find myself caving by indulging in behaviors and actions that are feeding this sense of loss and pain , yet i feel powerless. Is there any suggestions on changing my view to be able to endure and be willing to let go and accept this ? I’ve never experienced suffering at this extent . And this is coming from a 3 year sober heroin addict , which was easier than this . Ive been enduring best i can for 3 months , but it continually arises , even after intermittent days of semi-relief

[@HillsideHermitage]

What you are going through is the result of allowing your mind to become established upon an external form of another person, through previously uncheck lust, craving, love, infatuation. So, what you are experiencing after the end of relationship is not the problem, it's the winddown of the problem. How long will that wind down last, depends on how much lust and infatuation and need has been accumulated. There is no quick "understanding" of what/why it happens that would free you from having to go through it. The only thing that you can do is slow down and learn how to operate normally within that pain and loss. Don't endure it for the sake of getting rid of it or spend time allowing your mind to carelessly think about that person. That's how the mind will become used to it and stop resisting it. Once the resistance stops, the pain will cease too.

[@medalxx12]

Your reply helped tremendously and added much needed context .Thankyou

[@flowersarelovesome]

Thank you, Bhante. Some questions: Is living in a city surrounded by swarms of people and man-made contrivances a hinderence to practice(especially the cultivation of mental seclusion) because it gives the mind the illusion of control and safety? Can continuous contemplation of annica effectively counteract the effects the exposure to the masses has on the mind and the illusions of modern life in general? How far can you take your practice in a large city if you are naturally a hermit, avoid women, and do relatively solitary work while keeping the eight precepts? Is stream-entry still a possibility for city-dwellers? I would like to make further progress in dharma practice but am not in a position to leave my current set of living arrangements.

[@HillsideHermitage]

The issue with cities is primarily that people would not be able to effectively practice sense restraint and guard their senses to the extent necessary for the Right view. If you can create an environment that would minimize that pressure and harassment of the senses by sights, sounds, smells, tastes, touches, then correct practice of the Dhamma is possible. Such environment would need to be sustained for long period of time. Years, not months. It takes time to see the mind correctly even if one lives completely withdrawn from the pressures of the cities and people, so it will take much longer if one still lives surrounded by them.

[@flowersarelovesome]

@Thaniyo Thero Thank you for your response. Your words recall something Venerable Nanavirathera wrote in the preface of a book on Buddhism: "[T]he doctrine of the Buddha is capable of application even today by any Western person who really has the vocation. But the undertaking was never easy, and the number who, in this modern world, will succeed in pursuing it to its conclusion is not likely to be large." Yes, I see that taking renunciation as far as it needs to go for proper Dhamma practice is what needs to be the priority. What is holding me back is that I am not certain that my health would allow me to practice in a hermitage or monastery setting without being a burden on others. For the time being, I must work on being physically and mentally robust enough to leave home and go forth as soon as it becomes feasible.

[@flowersarelovesome]

@@HillsideHermitage I understand. Dhamma practice requires the kind of sustained solitude and restraint that is very difficult to maintain in an unconducive environment such as a city. I often enjoy solitude for short periods but seldom the kind of sustained seclusion where I can be certain that I won't be intruded upon by another person for as long as I don't make an effort to seek company.

[@mio1330-u5c]

​@@flowersarelovesome What about moving to a less crowded area in the meantime? I find living in the countryside, and even some "sleepy" suburbs, much more favorable for renunciant practice. With goodwill

[@flowersarelovesome]

@@mio1330-u5c Yes, that is something I am definitely considering. Thanks for the suggestion.

[@AD-bf4tb]

I think that my questions have been answered in your previous talks but I just want to make sure that I have the right view regarding this matter. I originally came from Chan tradition and there has always been a huge emphasis on the meditation posture which is from my understanding is based on Maha Satipatthana sutta. However, from my own experience I realized that I get better "results" when sitting down on the floor without crossing my legs. My mind stops worrying about the body and I feel like I can focus more on the endurance of my thoughts. Is this the right way to train or should I still try to sit in a full-lotus position?

[@HillsideHermitage]

That is the right way to train.

[@quengho3256]

- But how do you still this agitated aspect... - Well, if I tell you how to do it, there will be another activity you're going to do. So the only way to do it is to endure it. And through that endurance when you have no room to move left, right, forward or backward, you will find a way to calm yourself down.

[@waiting404godot]

It sounds as if he is describing shikantaza, the meditation preferred by Soto Zen. Does anyone know if he speaks to that meditation?

[@Limemill]

It's more like the meditation is a litmus test for how you have worked before the sitting. Like a feedback loop of sorts

[@designbuildfirmvisionstar1750]

Sawaminwahanse, oba wahanseta mage namaskaraya wewa, is there teaching or can you teach how to deal with the inner chat and calm it down? I’m referring to the knowledge created through 6 senses which fools use. I manage to be patient again and again to understand the actual change. Yet, my effort - focus goes reduces I beilive and get back the human knowledge, which I believe I have to stop thinking about what six senses say. What do I lack, what should I do live with ‘satiya’ 24/7 understand the reality, how do I reduce thanhawa get rid of thanhawa?

[@HillsideHermitage]

No, you cannot stop the mind (which is one of the senses) from thinking. But you can stop resisting what you are feeling WHILE the mind is thinking.

[@parthopdas]

> a heroin addict will not be free if he goes to rehab only in the weekends. 🤣🤣🤣 ñānamoli bhikkhu is brilliant as usual! ps: the above is in the context of keeping precepts as a ritual few days a month as opposed to making them part of one's existence!

[@harpreetsingh5545]

Sir, the basis for effortless mindfulness is to let anything that is currently present endure and then discern it properly. However, let's say a doctor is performing surgery. He is fully concentrated and absorbed in doing that task so he can save this person. A single mistake can result in the person's death. he cannot recognize anything and ask questions on that endurance because he cannot lose focus. Then how can he develop effortless mindfulness while being fully concentrated on his duty?

[@karrimzz]

@Harpreet Singh, Are you a surgeon? how about coming up with a question that arise from your own experience... Effortless mindfulness is a level that arise when you have trained your mind for a long time. This the result of long periods of training undertaken beforehand. To trrain the mind is like other kind of training, you have to devote time to only do the training, not do two things at a time.

[@alekzei5055]

Venerable Ajahn 🙏 When I guard my senses I start to expérience pleasant feeling through the whole body, like billions little dots vibrating and gently massaging it... I can just sit or lay down and just "bathing" in that feeling for hours. It never stops and no need any sens object. Thank to that easy but big pleasure my mind in so more inclined toward sense stimulations. But iam certainly not free from sensuality or ill will. What should I do with this pleasant feeling? Develop it? Abandon it? Investigate it? Thank you Venerable Ajahn 🙏🙏🙏

[@HillsideHermitage]

You don't have to do anything with it. Instead worry about the mind still not being free from sensuality because the full understanding of it hasn't been sufficiently developed.

[@alekzei5055]

@@HillsideHermitage Thank you Venerable Ajahn 🙏🙏🙏

[@bsways]

That happened to me. It was amazing. Felt like every cell was vibrating and I was floating. I became very attached to this feeling and couldn't stop thinking about it when I meditated. I guess it became a hindrance.

[@bsways]

How do you relinquish meditation bringing pleasure when the jhanas are so pleasurable?? Of course people want that!!

[@HAL_NlNETH0USAND]

This dude is so obnoxious, whenever the monk on the right tries to formulate a thought he immediately cuts him off and continues with his own ideas. He talks about moderation from everything and clearly he can't moderate himself from being in the teacher position.