CAREER SUCCESS and Complex PTSD Symptoms

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***
If you were hurt by trauma when you were a kid, you’re already painfully aware of how the old hurts, and fears, and triggers come back to haunt you, RIGHT when you’re trying to take a big step up on your career. The trauma wounds can rise up and make you say the wrong thing, lose your focus, get overwhelmed, or take yourself out of the running for an opportunity you really wanted.
In this video I teach strategies to help you show up strong and do great things in your work life -- even when you're still affected by Complex PTSD.
***
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[@cawknee]

👋🏾 Hey you reading this, yes you- The world still needs you! One step at a time, to untangle anything. We’ve got this! And thank you so much Ana for this work. Truly healing and accessible.

[@MT-bc1we]

Right on!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Yes! you are needed too!

[@betinalillebkrysgaard5224]

❤️

[@BabyLove-gx8zj]

This hit home, “the world still needs you”.

[@iw9338]

It really felt good to hear someone say the world needs me, wow. Yes, tears.😭😢😟🌞

[@HonestTimes]

1. Inability to work with other people 2.inanility to regulate your emotions, smallest pressure you get stuck 3.inability to get motivated, everyday depression puts you down

[@sandrabell1999]

Your description is spot on...thanks 💖

[@Ch50304]

Yes that feels like me.

[@mrgd7813]

That s me now.

[@MakerTom2022]

Yep

[@gabriellemorellisinger1608]

Can you do a series on how to financially get your life back, after being traumatized so helpful!!!

[@sophiakh9590]

yes ✨ Great suggestion

[@monasobkowich4608]

Dave Ramsey free on you tube very helpful.

[@JK-bp6oz]

Do you mean from other people or budgeting?

[@gabriellemorellisinger1608]

@@JK-bp6oz No by you

[@JK-bp6oz]

@@gabriellemorellisinger1608 Is it debt? Or did someone take control of your money? Identity theft?

[@KimPosteryournewpenpal]

Im sad thinking of all the times I got triggered at work :( it's embarrassing. Ty for putting this into words.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

There's still time to make things better!

[@jtruth129]

Toxic work environments are horrific to mind, emotions and body!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Staying in them is a trauma-driven decision.

[@jtruth129]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Amen. I realize that I had a “choice”. I haven’t stop choosing me ever since. It’s hard having to re mother and re father yourself as an adult. We got this gang👏🏾

[@JacquiCryer]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy wow ... of course ... I just keep thinking it’s not that bad .. I’m trauma bonded to my boss ?! 😳

[@PSALMS-oe7ri]

@@jtruth129 I have quit 3 jobs between the months of April-August 2020. I feel as though I have been black listed from getting a job because I filed a grievance because I was tired of the adult workplace bullying from coworkers & upper management. I pay attention to the signs NOW by listening to my discernment & make a plan of escape. I cannot take anymore abuse/hidden abuse from anyone and/or workplace.

[@followyourdreams8673]

My job is causing severe depression to the point I’ve absolute no confidence and self esteem. I feel like my dreams are dying and I am too. This video has made a difference to my day. Thank you.

[@tygoosehorn]

“What happened in the past is real, but what you’re doing in your present is more real”

[@nikiepunt8631]

It wrecks my career, relationships and everything else.. i don’t trust anyone.. I trust people I shouldn’t trust and I don’t trust people I can trust, I think. So now I trust no one. And I don’t trust myself enough to hold down a job which causes stress when I try to work. After a while of feeling like an imposter at work I get stressed and then physically sick. I get fired again. every single time I try.. not motivating. I panic easily and I forget everything I’m doing. from that point on I’m just a liability.. it’s so frustrating!!!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Well, you're here watching constructive videos, so you are doing something very positive!

[@nikiepunt8631]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy I’m watching a lot of vids about narcissism.. and I still do not feel a click.. like yes that is what I can work with.. a constructive solution that can give me a boost in the right direction.. sadly.. but I keep trying.. thank you for you videos ❤️

[@chomka426]

Me too. I have uncontrollable triggers that come out of nowhere ruining my jobs. People start gossiping, accusing, then harrassing-spilling water on my car seats, ripping off the rubber on windshield wipers, all because they falsely THINK they know something about me. I'm the one to get fired then, too. If they "know" so much, then why can't they see all the suffering I've done in my life. I wish it on them. They would have killed themselves by the time they were ten.

[@darrenhaynes4845]

I guess that's because, most offenders also have crappy childhoods. The trouble being is there fight, flight, Freeze response, makes them fight, in their paranoia against society. You probably will empathise with them more, and it makes you vulnerable/attractive support to the narcissistic type. See Peter Walkers thriving to surviving book, who informs you well on these problems. Best wishes. You are not alone

[@Dennis-ez7yy]

You describe it perfectly.

[@chrisfortune9491]

Any tiny criticism or even a bit of teasing can totally destroy my momentum. My creative excitement just collapses into raging self-hatred. I hate being so weak. The only way I can work is in total privacy, keeping all my work secret as much as possible.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I know the feeling. Not to push you, but you may want to try my techniques -- The Daily Practice -- for calming those reactions, so your creativity has more room.

[@reallifepsych3309]

So many of our daily mental burdens are sourced by our underlying traumas. Unfortunately we unintentionally suppress them, which makes the burden even harder to deal with.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Good summary. Thanks.

[@buddyneher9359]

I've now been retired a few years from a 30+ year 'non-career'. Sad story but at least I have a pension. The journey ahead is... bringing my gifts and my true self to my final years. Glad I found you, Anna, to help me with this.

[@danielraypickrel4316]

Also retired from a non-professional career. I dealt with enough traditional jobs to earn $390 a month. I It is good, to live with challenges.

[@buddyneher9359]

@@danielraypickrel4316 my career was professional. But I kept a very low profile and brought very little of myself to it. I devoted my real talents and skills to volunteer work.

[@sophiakh9590]

What does 'non-career' mean?

[@buddyneher9359]

@@sophiakh9590 it means that in 30 years working a professional job, I remained in the same position, not seeking any advancement. After working full-time for the first little while, I went part-time and stayed part-time for the bulk of my worklife. It kept a roof over my head, and allowed me to pursue other interests. But my pension is less than it would have been had I worked fulltime, plus I didn't get the fulfillment and achievement I could have gotten. And I didn't contribute much compared to what I could have.

[@sophiakh9590]

@@buddyneher9359 Thanks for explaining. Sounds like you found fulfillment outside of your career and enjoyed your youth. Your successes lie in your health and wellbeing,

[@codacreator6162]

I've been descending the career ladder for years, moving downward in search of the job that I feel so confident and overqualified in that I'll finally feel secure and safe. Take my word for it, the further down you go, the less valuable you will feel because your contribution IS less valued. It sucks.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Healing is an option, and it makes you feel MORE valuable. Because you are.

[@sixthsenseamelia4695]

The further down the ladder you go, the less narcissistic arseholes occupy it. There's no status at the bottom. Can't say I've encountered gas lighting, triangulation, bullying, professional sabotage etc cleaning toilets or emptying rubbish bins. Edit; grammar.

[@ladyjsunshine6325]

@@sixthsenseamelia4695 You win the internet ! Sounds like we have the same occupation & I love it. For the reasons you state, for the exercise & the service to people who truly deserve it. Also because we are the most unexpected & genuine. I sing while I work. Thank you for being you.

[@kathleenmorrison8450]

@@ladyjsunshine6325 Did you ever notice the very desperately needed jobs to be done are the ones that most society deems undesirable BUT the world wouldn't survive if they weren't done!

[@kathleenmorrison8450]

@@sixthsenseamelia4695 I totally agree. But I think it is ok for us to have our own ladder system, a different one in which WE SAY what is the most important for us instead of someone else deciding for us right? So our view of what's higher on the ladder or a step up is what we decide. We decide if happiness is more important than top pay or being true to ourselves instead of holding that impressive job title.

[@maryamHayaly]

I'm 46 years old, for the first time, in my life, there is someone who understands me and helps, thanks so much... Be always blessed 🌷

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you so much for the kind words!

[@theharringtons2010]

I have been trying very hard at work to try and conciously deal with triggers at work and today my boss called me into his office and gave me a promotion and a pay rise and has given me a team of people. I can't believe it, as a year ago I had been pulled in by my HR officer for the way I was speaking to people..😁

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

CONGRATULATIONS! Your efforts are working. VERY happy for you.

[@avaprod.8622]

I just got fired from a job I really liked and worked hard to get. The sense of disappointment knowing this was my fault because of self sabotage was so strong. But I also realized that I need to take my healing more seriously and understand how it is affecting me in every area of my life. I am trying to see the mistakes i’ve made and focus on how I can change and be better! It is hard but eventually I am learning to have more patience and compassion with myself for not knowing better

[@smoozerish]

"when time is passing you by and you feel like you are stuck outisde of your life".......that one cut to the bone for me because this exactly how I feel....

[@marywolfe6598]

I was a perpetual caretaker. I never realized that this is where I got self esteem. Now, I really don't want anyone to need me......I can't give what I don't have anymore. I want to be in peoples lives but not for what I can do for them....just because they enjoy my company. When you're a chronic giver then there will always be chronic takers! It seems people these days don't want true intimate friendships. Oh well!

[@sixthsenseamelia4695]

Good morning Crappy fams. Childhood abuse. Sabotaged ability of having dreams. If aren't able to conceive it, aren't able to achieve it. A job is simply something that keeps from the gutter. Vulnerability. Not a higher calling, goals or ambition. Depend on no one or nothing except yourself. Including employment. The higher you climb - the further you can fall. Living on a tight rope.

[@FirehorseG]

Oh how I relate to this. I never had dreams, goals, no higher education. I left school without sitting exams due to abuse. I married at 19 and just worked low paid jobs while supporting my very selfish husbands career choices. All for him. It never ever occurred to me that I had choices or wants. It's followed me my whole life until a few years ago when I had a breakdown of both mental and physical problems. On benefits, no future, health terrible, and CPTSD. My life has been utterly wasted.

[@sandrabell1999]

I find that I struggle with confidence especially in settings...easily intimidated with a morbid fear that I going to say things that will make me look stupid or immature outside of my league instead a part of situation that I can be an asset

[@mavrosyvannah]

Homelessness can cause mental health issues, mental health can cause homelessness.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Yes, exactly.

[@hansonel]

Such an important video for those who are having job and career difficulties. After 2 back to back toxic jobs I am now dealing with all of these, along with getting stuck in the fear of getting re-traumatized by a bad boss/ toxic work environment (thank god for Glassdoor and honing my gut instinct after those experiences). Rebuilding my professional confidence in an industry I always wanted to go into but didn't have confidence to and am debating starting my on business. "Being broke and in financial hardship makes us even more vulnerable to trauma" So true unfortunately. The importance of financial stability cannot be stated enough. Doing meaningful work that expands us is very important to healing. Just generally thriving in life too.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Glad it resonated with you :)

[@travelbug4536]

Makes me want to cry, but great video, great advice!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

You can do it!

[@theohuioiesin6519]

Indeed. This was so painfully true I can barely cope with the whole video. Working crappy jobs to avoid failing and being stressed out... My life.

[@travelbug4536]

@@theohuioiesin6519 Painfully true.

[@ligiacarvajal8633]

@@theohuioiesin6519 mine too...this was my radiography. Literally

[@itstheclaires8756]

I have actually said to myself I have no business being around other people at work years ago bc I would get so Dysregulated. I wish I knew this when I was in my 20’s. Love the comment abt the “years the locusts ate”

[@FeliciaShare]

Yep I did that. Started to heal after they fired me

[@desaturated-firefox]

I recently made a list titled "Benefits of having a real job" and I consult it a lot for motivation, because my spontaneous impulse is to only look at the downsides. It helps me keep in mind that it probably won't be as bad as I instinctively think. Also important to keep in mind (and counter-intuitive for people with CPTSD) is that _you can always change your mind later_ if you don't like where you're going! It's not like once you've said yes to a job you're now in job jail and can never quit! Anyway, I'm reminding myself of that a lot.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

This is excellent advice! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@DanaDoes]

Wow, talk about feeling validated! Thank you. This describes my work experiences so well. I abandoned my 10-year design career because I could not take working with/for other people anymore. I was making almost 6 figures and now I have pretty much nothing in the bank. I've been floating in a sea of confusion and frustration for the last few years as to how to make money and have a comfortable life but without the triggers of having a boss. Watching your video about calming triggers next.

[@lrow5416]

Such an important subject - I’ve been bullied countless times at different jobs and repeatedly forced to relive childhood traumas. It’s so good to be aware of what’s happening so you can take action to help yourself. I wish I had known then what I know now.

[@christelsalazar8169]

Can’t believe how on time this is in my life.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I love hearing that!

[@7_Siete]

I love how you've introduced the concept of the trauma being the one talking on certain situations where we are triggered. It has helped me define who I am and recognize when I'm letting my hurt do the talking. While I know the person I've become is greatly influenced by the fact I've suffered, the pain itself should never define you, the pain allowed you to see the things others do, that you don't want to do to others, but it's never a definition of who you are. I may be mistaken so I am open to a correction, but I hope this little thought is helpful :)

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I think you're stating a concept accepted widely by people committed to healing.

[@cactusqueen2259]

So glad I found you, Fairy...thank you for your video’s.👍🏻 I can totally relate to everything you say...it’s such a relief to get affirmation. I’m 63 and have had at least a dozen jobs where I have been bullied and isolated. My inability to connect always lets me down. Trying desperately to compensate by monopolising conversations or being the life and soul of a gathering just made me look unstable. I HATED being around people and couldn’t delegate tasks when I needed to. I’m now enjoying my retirement and the lockdown..☺️

[@flosp6842]

Thank you so much for this video - it popped up in my feed at just the right time. I’ve left a toxic work environment where I’d really trauma bonded to my abusive boss. The decision to leave was an empowered one, and I have a great new job to go to. But the panic, overwhelm and emotional histrionics I had in the process have taken their toll. I’m also really struggling with the breaking of the trauma bond since I left and I find myself ruminating about my old abusive boss and feeling like I still want to cling to them. I feel really ashamed about that and it is exhausting. I will use the time off I have between jobs to watch your videos so I don’t repeat the same old behaviours. Thank you 🙏🏻❤️

[@SPIRITWILDCHILD28]

There are days when I'm not up to listening to one of your videos, so I save them and listen when I am up to it. I can't begin to tell you how good it feels to know you are there when I need you. You have improved my life so much. Thank you simply isn't enough.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

My goodness -- thanks for this. I hope your healing is strong this year.

[@mariademers3111]

I picked a non fulfilling stuck in job , it took over as the abusive parent with plenty non stop abuse and unhealthy behavior . So glad I found you

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I'm so glad you're here! Sending you encouragement :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@QarleyQuark]

I was re-traumatized when I realized how not okay my childhood experiences were and that mental anguish pushed me out of the workforce. I haven't worked since I was 26 and am now 32. I need to work for a better quality of life but, despite years of talk therapy, I have been dreading and avoiding working since. I've kinda been just living frugally and hoping it'd work out but it's not cool anymore... Thank you for this video. I feel seen! 👋🏼

[@darrenhaynes4845]

me too....

[@catrocastre8215]

😣😔

[@Nina-sp1js]

Hi Anna! 🙂 I am sending you hello from Europe! Among youtubers and healers you have definitely catch my attention! You are my guide and soother on my healing journey on this world. Thank you very much for sharing all of this with us. Because of you I realised I have CPTSD. Last week I had another realisation that I have another biggie, anxiety. It feels empowering to put together peaces of knowledge about myself.

[@tracyschneider9123]

Thank you so much for this video. I’ve been struggling with work since I left my job of almost 19 years in March 2019. I haven’t found a job that’s a good fit yet. I find myself unable to function in a job where I’m required to think and learn new things because I can’t focus or concentrate. Then my anxiety and shame over not knowing what I’m doing drives me to quit. I spend a month or so jobless then panic and grab the first job in my “comfort zone” I can get just to have a paycheck, I’ll do that for a while then try another job that requires me to think and fail and quit again...at home, depressed and poor....repeat..repeat...

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Sounds like dysregulation... I hope you stick around here! I teach a lot about healing that!

[@lauraisawesome808]

I was trying to heal from past adolescent trauma, and then Covid hit. I’m a nurse and got started in the hospital when Covid first hit. The brain fog and disassociation are incredibly bad right now amidst new trauma I am exposed to every day at work. Thank you for these videos!

[@kvonduyke]

Right on! Please do a course on careers and another on finances.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Noted :)

[@MakerTom2022]

I've hopped more jobs than Frogger over the last 20 years, and am not proud of it. This is so enlightening, and a I am so glad to not be alone with it. Thank you!

[@littlemissprickles]

Man, I’m being laid off and this video came at just the right time.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Wow -- sorry about the layoff... or maybe this is an opportunity?

[@kassandra7607]

Thank you so much, Anna! I needed these insights right at this moment! I’m so very grateful for the way you connect our “workplace failures” to our cptsd. I’m actually a gifted and ambitious person, and I never understood why I didn’t function according to my potential and why I’m actually having workplace issues all the time. I think I know where to look now. Thank you so much!

[@jtruth129]

Thank you so much! Right now I’m retiring from the military and have some major opportunities in front of me but I’m so afraid. My trauma went from childhood, teens and career!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Oooh, then it's extra important that you heal! I'm rooting for you!

[@jtruth129]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Thank you!

[@jordanmcnulty6768]

my supervisor was gas lighting about my skill sets , demeaning , gatekeeping etc - woke up something in me - honestly that how I started addressing CPTSD - environment is everything - thank god for this time to heal and address thank you

[@hanaanhaffeel4181]

I just got out of my bad job, filled with the bullies manipulators and the all the mean girls haha. Your videos gave me the courage I was looking for months and months to finally take that step and find myself a new one! Thank you Anna ❤️

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thanks for sharing! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@ForrestMystic]

I do wish you would talk about work, career, coworkers and bullying and conflicts in the workplace more than relationships. I know relationships are a big deal, but I am more focused on finishing school and balancing work and school, and the medical feild is especially stressful in that regard. I'm not going to worry about relationships until I'm an RN. I have stuff to to do!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Feel free to write in for advice on the show at [e-mail] -Cara@TeamFairy

[@timothyalsobrooks4616]

I liked this phrase as I was taking the smallest baby steps out of being in a bad spot: start where you are, use what you have, do what you can. :)

[@lastdays9163]

Careers also cause trauma or compound existing trauma. Careers are also like relationships and can have an abusive dynamic and set-up an environment of self betrayal.

[@justinm4497]

the worst thing about being this way... normal people don't even try to understand, its easier to stick people in the crazy box and just ignore them, makes it much harder to trust anyone. you know they'll never understand you, and our society is insanely short tempered and spoiled. so we're all the more impatient. I did say we there, I am no exception.

[@stoicepictetus833]

I so needed this video, thank you. I was nodding in agreement all the way through it! At last, I can finally understand why I've been like this all my life!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Glad it was helpful!

[@charmedprince]

I always thought that if I could have my own house, where I can live under my own rules, that I'd be free to venture into bigger things. I'm now 30 and still living with my parents, working from home as a "designer", in one of the spare rooms in the house. I have a promising career but I'm just too scared to go big because I have a lot of fears from childhood trauma. The local Department of Trade in my area wants to work with me (as they say they see my potential) but I refuse one too many times. Since years ago, people has been telling me why I don't get a shop at the town center and I cannot tell them the real reason because they won't understand or might laugh at me. Now, I am trying to be positive that I'd finish a small studio/tiny house I started years ago so i can move into it. And maybe pursue my dreams after the pandemic.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Fears can really block us, perhaps try the course I discuss about getting rid of fear crappychildhoodfairy.com/

[@charmedprince]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Thanks. I will see to it but I don't have much time for other things/courses 😄😄. I play KZbin videos while working and you have tons of helpful videos. I watch ads to help my favourite KZbinrs, 😊. It's the least i can do. Thanks again, Anna.

[@GLeon-ov9yu]

You described my career cycle of losing high paying career jobs not for lack of skill, knowledge or experience but because of my constant trauma based disregulation

[@corinnefisher166]

You are an answer to my prayers! Your infinite knowledge & the way you coach/deliver therapeutic solutions is so beautiful and I am so grateful for you following this path! You obviously chose to share 'your gifts' with the world! Thank you for giving us hope and putting into words what we couldn't explain!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

You are so welcome

[@whatdoyoulivefor735]

I've dealt with this my entire adult life. I grew up poor and neglected and have a fear of money for reasons that have been so mysterious to me. I wish I had it, but if I ever do have even just a little more than I need to scrape by, I feel very uneasy. It's as if I try to get rid of it as soon as possible! I constantly shy away from opportunities to get more of it and although I have the potential to do a lot , I only feel like I can get the worst jobs in our society. It's as if I think money=pain somehow...

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

This is the kind of deep wreckage I understand. My techniques are what helped me reach these hard places and transform them.

[@jeannedawson2868]

Thank you for your videos. I have struggled my whole life with these issues and didn't know why.

[@jessielcox]

This really hit the nail on the head. This video was so relatable and I felt like you were talking directly to me. Thank you for making these videos!!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Oh good! I'm glad you're here!

[@refusedone]

I have struggled my whole life to figure out my true calling, I’ve realized it’s because I don’t know myself bc I’ve lived my false self…i hope recovery will be mire clarity

[@wkt2506]

I think it's important to realise that trauma comes in many forms, and even with the severe form of PTSD, people have some difficulties and not others. Remedies should be bespoke & we should try and notice areas in which we are doing well or okay too.

[@sophiakh9590]

I NEEDED EXACTLY THIS!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Oh good!

[@darrenhaynes4845]

I think as well, where a lot of us go on to become volatile, we take up relationships with bossy controlling narcists who want us to be co-dependent on them. They then trigger our fears making us unhappy with our personal lives, social lives, sex lives, where our home becomes an unsafe place. This then takes down our working lives, which is the only release from the unhappy place. ( I speak here for those that go on to have domestically violent relationships)

[@jerrodlopes186]

Perfect timing for me. Thank you!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Perfect!

[@tihanaharrison6728]

What a fantastic video, Anna! I wish I had known all this 10+ years ago. Bullying in my last job cost me a lot in so many different ways. It takes a lot of effort and time to heal from that. Thank you for all you do in such a great way. 💖❣️🥰😘😘

[@hayleychase4619]

The TIMING. I'm working on a huge career project and I'm completely shutting down 😅

[@hayleychase4619]

@Goth Vaush - Jedi Master Engineer a what now?

[@darrenhaynes4845]

I want to draw peoples attention to one of my worst fears, without taking any credit from Anna Runkle. I know this fear as Chronophobia. Its known as the fear of time. I don't get it with my CPTSD as from watches, timepieces, but, from watching others typically developing and achieving. I get this from where my life isn't developing normally compared to anyone typically, and measuring myself against them. I feel it comes from being beaten up and years of domestic violence's and not being able to move /develop like others, that I will isolate myself from others to reduce the pain. It is a hideous pain, stops me talking about myself and keeps me hidden as a victim....like I don't want to identify! It then triggers another ailment 'Thanatophobia' where I feel my life not moving and I am dying all the time. I am chronic in my symptoms and have taken to rounds of domestic violence/narcissism over over thirty eight years. I put this here incase people felt the same and Anna might know some informative way of dealing with this. Best wishes.

[@jpadkins1988]

I have fear of time not passing and what to do with free time. Then sometimes I have fear about time going too fast (I have an 11 year old son). I keep trying to explain to people that I have a fear of time! I have never heard of chronophobia! I can even remember as a child feeling upset that cows have stand around all the time just waiting, and being afraid they were miserable! I have been through years of counseling, 12 step groups, you name it. I cannot understand what has caused my fear of time and how to get healed of it.

[@roro8471]

I used to feel something similar (and still, sometimes, do) when a friend or colleague would announce that they were taking a year out to travel the world, that they'd got engaged, started in a great new job, or that they were pregnant. It wasn't about being envious of them. With friends, especially, I was pleased for them. It was more that these types of announcements were a reminder of how different and "small," my own life felt, by contrast. To me, it felt like my peers could make events like this happen so easily (I now realise this isn't true at all!) whereas, for me, making those types of things happen, or daring to hope for such things felt impossible. The whole of my twenties and thirties was spent feeling this way. As I approach the end of my thirties now, I don't know, I've just come to accept that I am what I am and just tried to invest time and energy in the things I enjoy - hobbies and pastimes. And this has helped. I was raised to compare myself to others, in all ways material - looks/appearance, dress, social status, educational achievements, so it's no wonder my natural default is to compare. But there's no right or wrong to live a life, as long as you are not hurting yourself or others. The vast majority of people in most societies will fall in love, get married and have kids, but this doesn't happen to everybody...or it might happen, but it will be a bit more haphazard and not follow the more regular timeframe or path...and that's really OK. It doesn't mean that you are somehow less of a person. I've known people who have found true joy and contentment in owning a sanctuary for rescue dogs. Never married, no kids, but happy to be with the dogs, doing something they are passionate about. A guy at work, his wife couldn't have kids, but they ended up adopting a child aged 55 (long story) and found love and joy that way. I don't know if any of this helps, but in doing the things that you enjoy, whenever you can, as much as you can, whatever happens in your life, you'll have then had some joyful experiences 😊

[@AnnaBreit]

This is a topic that is not talked about enough in trauma circles. Please make more videos about this

[@nathanosterhaus]

I'm 44 and have been struggling with this for my whole life. I'm just now getting the real help for myself and on my path to healing and success.

[@queenwasabii]

Thank you. More of these types of videos really help me get perspective of what is happening and how to navigate through it. Thank you.

[@abigailknox-leet6949]

I’m 48 Bitterly unhappy at work Planning to start my own company But I feel stuck at moment in a very toxic working environment

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

You are not stuck! Trauma makes it feel that way.

[@abigailknox-leet6949]

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy how can I cope with toxic work stress While I’m working on my person project 🙏🏼

[@tiepolo100]

This is so insightful and familiar and describes multiple work situations that I have experienced in my life.

[@redbingsoo]

Anna I have been WAITING for this video. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

[@CW-rx2js]

You speak in such a kind and gentle way ❤

[@lukeskywalkerlucasfilm]

Wow! I really needed this episode. Thank you so much for discussing this topic! Thats my whole career described in 10 mins. I knew subconsciously what was happens but had no idea how to connect the dots. Glad and sad to know Im not the only one, makes so much sense.

[@punyashloka4946]

Its true complex trauma does make you afraid of money 💰

[@azayats5258]

This is spot on and very revealing for me. I would love it if you could do more content on CPTSD and finances because I’ve been on this journey for a while now and this is the first time I heard someone talk about it like this. And this is so incredibly important and very very real! Thank you.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Noted, thanks for suggestion!

[@brandycolmer7052]

Thank you so much for this. I am wading back into work that I never through today do again. I don’t love it, but I’m experienced at it, and it pays well, and by doing it right now…I’m facing my fears and rewiring my trauma. It’s getting better.

[@tennymusgravebrown8797]

I didn’t know it, but in September 2020 I jammed a stick in the wheel and it landed on getting my teachers license renewed. And that’s all I can focus on right now. When I’m done, then I will think about what comes next. And I know I’m procrastinating some, doing it all slowly, because the reality is that I don’t want to have to move on to whatever decisions I need to make when I’m done. But I think that’s ok because I’m making progress and have only 10 hours left to complete. As long as I keep moving forward, it doesn’t matter how long it takes me. What matters is that I finish. Thank you, Crappy Childhood Fairy 🧚‍♂️. You are helping me.

[@Sagnikmay1]

Thank you for existing... ❤

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy

[@SCnative64]

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS: Life meaning, connection, intimacy, pleasure, mutual support, companionship, understanding, trust, vulnerability, responsibility to show up, experiencing the best this life has to offer (Love) WORK: Practical necessity. (Nothing more nothing less, in my case). Although it does seem like there's overlap with some of the traits needed to show up for a HEALTHY relationship, and those needed to hold down a decent or somewhat decent job.

[@koreanarab]

Thank you for the free course and teaching the technique to release fears and resentment It is really good and valuable ❤️❤️❤️

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Oh, that makes me so happy! I'm so glad you're using it and finding it helpful!

[@codacreator6162]

My disregulation occurs daily and is a direct result of the job, itself. Not sure what I'll be able to salvage of it, if anything.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I encourage you to take my courses. You can find the real cause, and finally get the power to change this situation!

[@daniellecharming]

Thank you Anna 🙏💜 your channel has changed my life

[@michalshg]

I relate so much! Wish I saw this a week ago, I had awesome job opportunity and in the second interview I feel like I slipped into the scared traumatised child mode - couldn’t represent myself at all, just got scared, defensive and dissociated because of the pressure the questions put on me 😭😭😭

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

CCF is here for some more structured support around healing from CPTSD bit.ly/2rukHvh -Cara@TeamFairy

[@annijohnson6210]

Too late. 2008 and VERY toxic work environment - didn’t know it was toxic then - sent me into a MAJOR depression. A woman at work said, “I don’t want you here,” and I heard my mother saying, “You’re too sensitive; I can’t stand you; I wish I never had you.” I’ve spent the last thirteen years learning. Still learning. Career gone. Life gone. Self gone. This has been like recovering from a severe stroke.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

There is recovery, we're glad you're here. -Cara@TeamFairy

[@lanishortsunshine5773]

do. what's doable not what's difficult

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Small steps -Cara@TeamFairy

[@elliothughes716]

LOVE this video, thanks Anna

[@ashlee6240]

Interviews!!! I’ve cried twice and missed out in several opportunities!

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Aw, that's so poignant. I hope you've found employers who were happy enough to have a sensitive should on board.

[@octopusfly]

Thank you for sharing this information. You bring hope and the necessity for figuring out our personal labyrinth. ~an American in Korea 🇰🇷

[@harleyquinn5774]

My flashbacks have occurred at work and co-workers and higher ups have seen it. I don’t want them to, it’s embarrassing for me, but thankfully I told my supervisor so she knows that my becoming aware that someone has witnessed me is enough to snap me out of it and additional actions from others is not only unnecessary, but hindering on my ability to recover and focus on my work.

[@erzsidobrai7643]

Thank you for your valuable videos, I learned so much and became much more confident 🎉

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

I'm so glad! Thank you for your comment. We love to hear Anna's videos are helpful! Nika@TeamFairy

[@TheSekretaare]

So happy to have found your channel 🤗

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Me too!!

[@Witchywoman13]

Yes! It sucks! I feel stuck.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Totally understand! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@jaguitdori9662]

Watching you from Spain !! Thank you very much!! Could you please develop this issue to a series of videos we need it so much, it is a life changing issue. Thank you very very much ❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@rgw4393]

I ended up crying for almost 40 mintues at work today, was frustrating esp because it felt like it can from nowhere. Was confused, could not focus. Luckily my bosses were kind and had me go on my 30min and they kept saying I could go home if I needed. I had also brought my flute with me and my headphones and music so I was able to re-boot my brain enough during my 30mins to finish my shift

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Great method for dealing with that dysregulation :) -Cara@TeamFairy

[@melodybrooke1376]

Thank you Anna this is what I needed to hear today

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Great!

[@rjmilitante2787]

I really got a lot out of this video, thank you

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Glad it was helpful!

[@NM-vn6bw]

I thank God ,the Creator of the heavens and the earth for leading me here...Cptsd really made me very difficult to bear with in the work place...I did not know where this confusion comes from ....just knowing its cptsd make life easier.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

So glad to hear that! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@trejea1754]

I have 2 degrees but never really had a career. I’ve only had dead-end jobs, most of them not in my areas of study. I’ve been so limited in what I can do or think I can do. I make silly mistakes and have trouble with decisions. I’m low energy and struggle with Adrenal Fatigue, which plays a big part. The AF is of course related to CPTSD. Just tonight I decided to leave the job I’m currently in; it’s yet another low-paying field I don’t fit into. #1 reason for quitting: a supervisor who yells. I’m 59 and at this point will not put up with that. But I don’t see much on the horizon, work-wise.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

We recognize it's a struggle, beginning to work with some of the tools is best solution we have for you. Start here with this free course crappychildhoodfairy.com/lp/daily-practice -Cara@TeamFairy

[@Sy2023hk]

I would like to be a construction project manager, no matter my difficulties, mindfulness and self calming are key to helping ourselves. Just breath and don't hate yourself in any way. We have so many difficulties that it's impossible for things to get better if you show only self harm to yourself.

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

Rooting for you! -Cara@TeamFairy

[@NoName-el9ee]

OMG this is soooo me 🥺🥺

[@jromeo8247]

Thank God you are who you are and your message

[@shellebel1]

Not all emotional responses are unreasonable. Not trusting my feelings has created more trauma and self-doubt. I need to advocate for my own wellbeing. How can we tell the difference between 'acceptable' and unreasonable reactions?

[@CrappyChildhoodFairy]

That's why I recommend 1) Daily Practice and 2) Buddy. It's a way to gain discernment in an accelerated way.

[@kimberlydonaldson4904]

Thank you!