North - Nostalgia Critic

[@IamARobot7]

Fun fact: Kathy Bates hated the script and was even advised by her agent to turn it down. She only agreed to do the film as a "thank you" to Reiner for getting her an Oscar for "Misery".

[@alvexok5523]

Yeah, I remember reading that. I totally agree with Roger Ebert, I hated hated hated this movie too.

[@hrrproductions553]

I never realised that before, but I think that I agree with both Kathy Bates and Roger Ebert on this one. North was a horrible movie and I'm not lying when I say that

[@CTladiesman]

🆗 Cool

[@alvexok5523]

@@hrrproductions553 I can't believe that the same director who did classics like Misery did such a horrible bomb like this one. Reiner must've really really REALLY been going through a major slump during the time he did North. There were so many awful things in this movie. And the song from Dan Aykroyd and all of them was so freakin CRINGE. And at that moment I didn't think that the movie could get even worse, BUT IT DID!! Roger Ebert, RIP, I agree with your review SO MUCH

[@hrrproductions553]

@@alvexok5523 So do I, and I also agree with your opinion

[@andysmith5806]

My Japanese friend said to me "at least they didn't insult my culture." I told him that they probably think Asian is a singular culture.

[@linkspokemon4114]

Don't tell him about Hawaii

[@ruggiebuggie3195]

My wife is Chinese. She gets annoyed too when people act like Asia is a country. “I don’t wanna be Asian, I wanna be Chinese.”

[@Deleted268-k7j]

Okay?.

[@Deleted268-k7j]

​@ruggiebuggie3195 Blame the school learning, and media and more she shouldn't blaming on us like that.

[@Stevenirons]

That's because it is 😂

[@MrAwsomeness360]

*“I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it.” ~ Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times*

[@xanzibar5374]

MrAwesomeness360 You’re too nice!!!

[@devanhinskey9001]

"YOU'RE TOO FUCKING NICE!" -Nostalgia Critic

[@KeeperJoseph]

That sums up the Emoji Movie well.

[@JamesMC04]

MrAwesomeness360 So Roger Ebert was not keen on it ?

[@FizzleFX]

Director: "so... you say you didn't like it?" *clearly understanding his audience*

[@N3ur0m4nc3r]

You missed the first joke. The parents in Texas note that their (former) overweight son could eat more than anyone else in a month - and hated February. February is the shortest month in the year. Therefore, he hated February because he was unable to out-eat everyone else by as wide a margin during that month... presumably.

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

Too bad that joke was poorly delivered.

[@JosephDutra]

@@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq and just…a bad joke in general.

[@Robscurity]

​@@JosephDutraYeeeah it was definitely in poor taste...no pun intended.

[@Jebu911]

@@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq yeah but NC still didnt get the pretty obvious jokes. Not saying this is a good movie but it does have a lot of jokes in it.

[@hunterwilder9665]

The fact that this “movie” did not win a single Razzie is nothing short of a miracle

[@klimmr]

Was it at least nominated?

[@andrewbloom7637]

@@klimmr Yes, it received 6 nominations.

[@elder-woodsilverstein7716]

The Shining won a Razzie! THE SHINING!!!

[@hunterwilder9665]

@@elder-woodsilverstein7716 The Shining did not win any Razzies. It was nominated for two, but it didn’t win any

[@elder-woodsilverstein7716]

@@hunterwilder9665 I think I heard Shelly Duvall, the woman who played Wendy, won a Razzie.

[@happymammal7928]

TO THIS FILMS CREDIT... ...the fact that it is a dream explains why Willis would keep popping up out of random, why the story can get weird and unusual, and why the distant locations are seen as stereotypical. North hasn't BEEN to these places and can only imagine the people as stereotypes. It doesn't make this film GOOD but it does explain some of it

[@TriniKnight01]

He was only a genius etc in his dream though.

[@respectedsalmon9390]

@@TriniKnight01 North hasn't entered the dream portion yet. He's still awake. It's likely that he's exaggerating his achievements and following the films humor, but he isn't asleep yet.

[@FizzleFX]

*to the movies credit* may means something else then you think! To its credit = using the dumbest and oldest cliche!? How about "What works against this movie, is that nothing of this ever really happened!!" Its like a backwards Total Recall... - total decal ! ......... gosh Don't try to sugar a piece of horsepoo... all you got is dirty sugar.

[@troywright359]

It's like that's how he imagines his dads workplace to be, and how boring he imagines a court scene to be

[@autobotstarscream765]

So is the Bruce Willis character an angry Darkrai-like god inflicting this nightmare upon both the protagonist and the audience to hammer "how DARE you stop honoring thy mother and father for even a minute!" into everyone's heads with a bastardized version of the core concept of It's A Wonderful Life?

[@AngelicaSpyro]

Well at least Elijah Wood isn't remembered for this and everyone remembers him for Lord of the Rings, Over the Garden wall and Wilbur.

[@foxtoons1999]

AngelicaSpyro He's also Mumble from Happy Feet

[@feralchangeling97]

AngelicaSpyro And Dirk Gentry's Holistic Detective Agency.

[@mrcritical6751]

And Dirk Gentley got unceremoniously cancelled when BBC could instead cancel a bad show like Eastenders

[@98953812]

Don't forget Greenstreet Hooligans

[@rogerebertjr.]

Also ESOTSM (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind)

[@SeanR794]

February was his least favorite because it has the least amount of days in it, and they said he can eat as much in a day what most eat in a month. Even understanding this joke, however, does not make it funny in the slightest.

[@P07H34D]

+Sean Rushing There is nothing to understand. They spelled out everything word for word. You literally do not need a brain to get it.

[@SeanR794]

Pot Head Critic didn't appear to get it, he only seemed to understand the big loss "joke"

[@P07H34D]

Sean Rushing O he got the entire movie. He just wanted to make a bunch of bad jokes they could have used in the film.

[@KiraMustDie26]

+Sean Rushing Even understanding that joke, it still makes no sense. What difference does the number of days in a month make if you're still eating a month's worth of food every day?

[@SeanR794]

KiraMustDie26 Because the amount the amount he ate each day would technically vary based on the month, and since February has the least days, he ate the least in February.

[@OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN]

"There's only one barren area on this whole island..." WOW. Like, not even in the 80s.

[@Ananasbringer]

I thought that one was actually hilarious - but I guess most people aren't into black humor xD

[@davematthews1492]

@@Ananasbringer You meant dark humor right?

[@Ananasbringer]

@@davematthews1492 Isn't that the same?

[@Rivenstoneify]

@@Ananasbringer example of black humor would be the Tyler Perry movies. An example of dark humor would be the existence of the Tyler Perry movies

[@MegaWillPrime16]

Timestamp I can't remember where they said it

[@iBurnCDs]

it's astounding how many good actors are in this movie and yet the storyline sinks like titanic.

[@belacickekl7579]

Christina Kwon more like the submarine from the third animated Titanic movie!

[@aussieman3021]

Yeah, an absolute waste of talent.

[@suprakn1ght7y24]

@@aussieman3021 Wait, there’s talent?

[@aussieman3021]

@@suprakn1ght7y24 Yeah, there is, but it's all wasted here.

[@stephenfox8685]

They were clearly pimped into it the way Bruce Campbell was with Congo.

[@charlie7329]

I'm surprised it didn't do a British stereotype.

[@PetaHatingChris42]

+Charlie Drummond I can only imagine. Everyone drinks tea, wears bowler hats, and is extremely polite.

[@morehero1]

+Charlie Drummond Or Mormon. "Shivers"

[@shablambalam2795]

+Chris C. Don't forget everyone has bad teeth and references the queen in every sentence.

[@zenith8417]

+Chris C. Don't forget annoyingly pretentious, overuses big words to sound smart, and always smoking a pipe.

[@icecreamhero2375]

+TheUtubedude101 LOL

[@ValenWarden]

Ok, the Amish part legitimately made me laugh... Although it could of been the lack of comedy from the rest of the movie...

[@gageperuti5519]

Valen Warden Yeah, it's literally the only funny joke in the movie.

[@toysvilltvstudios7576]

That's the best part! XD

[@mrcritical6751]

It is funny how North just flies off

[@papershadow]

It's partly because the joke is at least somewhat on North really hating the idea of no technology rather than just "look how ridiculous we can make these stereotypes," which is also down to how short the joke is.

[@kingrichardiii6280]

Also it was the most merciful stereotype. what did they pick on? they speak Pennsylvania Dutch, no electricity, and very unoriginal with names.

[@Lizalieu]

I believe that the original ending had North waking up in a mental institution. His narcissistic dilutions had gotten out of control and his parents began to worry when he kept talking about how because he was so perfect the media was out to kill him at the orders of The Editor and only the Bunny Man could save him.

[@juanitabrown8931]

Why couldn't they keep this ending?! I would love this movie if that was the case!!

[@PurpleMoonFlute]

Really? That ending honestly would make a lot more sense

[@alvexok5523]

@@PurpleMoonFlute They probably didn't use that ending because it'd be too dark. I'm sure Rob Reiner thought that the ending with it all having been a dream with him waking up into a life that's still good would be more happy and upbeat to movie viewers. It doesn't change though how terrible alot of the movie was.

[@alvexok5523]

@@juanitabrown8931 See my above reply to @Owlbard

[@rb8566]

Oh my god. When I first saw the main kid I thought "huh, he looks a lot like Frodo." Then you said he was Elijah Wood and I was like "OOOOOH THAT'S WHY!" I'm an idiot.

[@pseydtonne]

Don't feel bad. Your brain was trying to protect you. We all wish we could unsee it.

[@jongon0848]

The premise isn't that bad, I can see it being pulled off as a remake if done correctly. Maybe it's a kid wanting to divorce his parents and as he travels from place to place, he learns a special value from their culture or heritage that helps him come to realize how much he wants his parents in his life again.

[@aussieman3021]

I think that's the point of the book this movie is based on, even if it is a parody of children's morality tales. Also, in the book, all of the events actually happened and it wasn't dreamt up.

[@mattdarrock666]

North: A movie that went south.

[@aaronm4858]

@@marcguerra1854 so South were in Mexico

[@n.j.oproductions5790]

@@alexjewett7455 landing deeper than the earth's crust

[@RJIS]

Matt Darrock so south that people believe the earth is flat

[@ClopinGirl64]

Haha! Nice one! (P.S. Love your profile pic. 😹)

[@solesurvivor327]

Well to your credit, that joke is 20x better than any in this movie.

[@lostfan10000]

What's funny is that this show has links to both Over the Garden Wall and Gravity Falls. Elijah Wood will not only grow up to be Frodo but also Wirt from Over the Garden Wall. John Ritter is Jason Ritter's father, Jason would grow up to play Dipper Pines. Small world.

[@TheLewdOtaku]

lostfan10000 I like these cartoons as much as the next guy but they're nowhere near worthy of being praised in the same sentence as Frodo man

[@mikeym2126]

TheLewdOtaku Over the Garden Wall is an actually amazing Mini-Series

[@TheLewdOtaku]

Michael Mullan Yeah it's good but not exactly that popular when you compare it to lotr

[@camrynbrewer2370]

John Ritter is also the voice of Clifford the Big Red Dog.

[@asiabrown99]

Camryn Brewer I didn't know that.

[@Ortlab]

Am I the only one who finds the Amish joke even the slightest bit funny? The build up wasn't too humorous, but the part where he said, "Floor it!" and the plane takes off at about 1000 miles an hour had me dying.

[@spencertheg23]

Baltro I'll admit, it made me chuckle a little bit

[@alacnaythegreat1054]

The sped up footage is what did it for me.

[@toysvilltvstudios7576]

You're not alone! ^^

[@cartoonnetworkdisneyxdsupe6864]

Ortlab No, I laughed at it too.

[@dracoxiii6188]

It's the sole bit of brass in this steaming turd.

[@b3rz3rk3r9]

To quote George Takei on this movie, in one of his most memeable quotes: *"You are made of Stupid"*

[@themarioman5673]

"North's room is ALWAYS clean" "North always looks both ways" "North never spoils his apatite" "North flosses" North delivered a baby, cured chicken pox and the flu, created a lovable TV show, created the internet, sold merch about him and has 500 girlfriends that never left him.

[@josephrowe849]

And he laid down his life to keep the box safe from the robot menace!

[@MissBarker93]

​​@@josephrowe849Lest we forget- *(RIPS THE PAPER)*

[@opalyasu7159]

He is truly the Gariest of Stus

[@somerandofromoregon]

North is secretly Mr. Beast

[@opalyasu7159]

@@somerandofromoregon he gave water and burgers to everyone in Africa

[@jacobkoster3808]

Another joke about the take off his pants Dad: loosen his pants Critic: (imitates dad) quick I want to get to him before the bunny suit guy gets him

[@NatedogO33]

This comment needs more thumbs ups.

[@2117ao2]

Dad: loosen his pants Now we get to see what a hobbits thing REALLY looks like.

[@homuraakemi103]

"Loosen his pants!" But that's not how panic attacks work! Wait, I was supposed to make a joke? Oh...

[@2117ao2]

jacob koste Loosen his pants: So that's what he did at the Grey Havens

[@muskatDR]

Dad: Loosen his pants We told him not to make a piercing out of the one ring of power

[@theganon111]

Even thought the pants scene is hilarious, there is a valid reasoning for loosening pants since it allows better blood circulation in times of Panic Attacks, Heart Attacks, etc

[@alextrebek8293]

and molestation

[@dylanaroberts97]

alex trebek Okay, that made me snicker.

[@reviewception4328]

theganon111 please tell me your making it up

[@FriendlyNeighborhoodDM]

Don't you ever try to bring logic into this movie again! This is North, bitch!

[@alexjewett7455]

isn't it supposed to be your shirt so the blood goes to your brain?

[@muthesquirrel]

If it was all his fantasy, do you think North's parents realise how terribly racist their son is?

[@CazRaX]

+Andy Semple He was barely a teenager and has never been anywhere, he isn't racist he is naive there is a difference. At that age TV and maybe stories you overhear make up what you know about the world and that ends up being 99% bias leading to things like this, still doesn't make it racist.

[@muthesquirrel]

CazRaX It was a joke, dude. Chill. Only the creator was racist.

[@CazRaX]

Andy Semple Or they were trying to think like a child when making it (it would explain the horribleness of it all).

[@azbrowne]

He watches too much TV and he didn't read enough books.

[@muthesquirrel]

CazRaX Any excuse you can give them is lost the moment they paint someone's face to be another race.

[@sarahnour5561]

Don't shoot me... but I'd actually like to see a remake of this film. The premise isn't bad, in my opinion - it's the execution that needs work. Imagine if North's search for new parents went like this: 1) The Texas couple wear normal clothes, are filthy rich due to their oil wells, and run a ranch, where they teach North how to ride horses. His riding lessons go array, resulting in him being dragged on the ground while dangling from the saddle. At some point, the father has a slip-up and says, "Way to go, Buck!" which prompts North to ask, "Who's Buck?" Then North finds out they're only teaching him to ride horses because that's what Buck loved to do, and they were feeding him Buck's favorite foods and giving him Buck's old clothes in the hopes that he'll fill become more like him. North decides he wants more psychologically stable parents, and while he sadly reflects on them missing their son, he wonders if his own parents miss him as well. 2) At first, Hawaii agrees with North. He enjoys the beach, the fresh air, the sunshine, the water sports, etc. Then he realizes Mr. and Mrs. Ho have been taking so many pictures of him because they're selling them to tabloids and making money off him. They only want to adopt him because it will help their image and further the Mr.'s political career. Then North goes swimming and gets stung by a jellyfish. Instead of getting him first aid, Mr. Ho rallies his photographers to take photos of his wound. As North leaves, he realizes that his real parents would have tended to his injury rather than taking photos. 3) Alaska seems fun at first. The parents are outdoorsy, so North looks forward to camping trips and kayaking. Then he finds out they're a family of fishermen and they want to take him out on their boat. The waves are treacherous, North gets seasick, and someone falls overboard. North decides this life isn't for him, decides not to press child endangerment charges, and reflects that his own parents never put him in harm's way.

[@pixel5708]

Not a bad idea make that a movie!

[@MissBarker93]

I love everything about this concept.

[@mach6247]

Someone should hire you.

[@spencertheg23]

Sarah Nour Hmm....that's a pretty good idea!

[@edwardv1255]

I believe this premise was made for the 90s, and the 90s alone. Your suggestions would make for a better movie, albeit more of a family drama than a comedy (as this one claims to be), and it's a plus that Elijah Wood could easily go back into the role, but still... I just can't imagine anyone would be able to make anything watchable out of this, and the geniuses who potentially could, should focus on better projects. Just my opinion though, and I've lost belief that Hollywood can ever produce anything non-toxic when it comes to family movies (which isn't animated*, actually tried to find a way to make an interesting animated version of this, but couldn't come up with any great ideas), so I went into it highly biased. :) From a practical standpoint, this movie bombed badly, earning less than 20% of money spent, so doubt anyone would fund a remake, no matter how good the idea is. Love, Mr. Attempted-Killjoy

[@epicrapfan73]

15:06 "Abe Vigoda, what are you doing? Is there really just no movie that you'll say no to? I mean, did you read the script? You know it couldn't have been a good movie. My guess is he was in some kind of contract or something. It probably went something like this:" "Abe, Rob Reiner says you have to do his new movie North." "Hell, he can't do that. It screws up all my arrangements." "Sorry, Abe, you're under contract." "Tom, can you get me off the hook? For old times' sake?" "Can't do it, Abe." "Come on. You get to dress like an Eskimo and everything."

[@KevlarNinja]

"People on the Mainland don't care about Hawaii."Oh yeah, because Americans just HATE the idea of a tropical vacation spot that they can go to without having to leave their country.

[@furioussherman7265]

Don't forget the fact that Hawaii is one of the fifty states that give the U.S. its name.

[@knightofetro13]

Yeah the same tropical vacation spot where the US overthrew Hawaiian royalty and colonized Hawaii for its resources!

[@fleetadmiralauto6506]

@@knightofetro13 America wins again!

[@climber6420]

Yeah totally"not" my favorite place to vacation spot

[@RJIS]

Matt Lipton who wants a vacation am I right

[@IFDFAdmiralY11]

Should I be ashamed that I chuckled at "Your Honor, the defense rests."?

[@teregrinpook3835]

I have a relatively decent sense of humor and I found it kind of funny, along with the plane hitting the window for no goddamn reason. But then, it _is_ 4am. I find everything funny when I'm tired. Fuck.

[@Tareltonlives]

+EqDF Yoshi I admit I smirked.

[@ProdigyPlaysYT]

+Teregrin Pook I tend to laugh at a joke when its terrible more often then when its a good joke, I don't know why, I just find bad jokes really funny

[@MsSphinx91]

+EqDF Yoshi I liked the bird in the bush and the Miami jokes....and the stewardess thinking he's dead. I know, I'll never be a comedy writer, it's fine.

[@theganon111]

I smiled when I saw that, not quite at the point of chuckling. I really don't think that's the worst joke ever made.

[@lakephall]

Elijah Wood with a guy in an animal costume? Insert Wilfred joke here.

[@Gorypaladin346]

God damn it beat me too it

[@nerveagent1905]

Beat me to it by two years!

[@jbvader721]

Apparently, North was a prequel to Wilfred.

[@n.j.oproductions5790]

15:43 his face sums this movie up perfectly!

[@viviansventures]

12:00 Did they just make a joke about infertility In a KIDS MOVIE?

[@tristanhartup4936]

A FAMILY PICTURE...

[@channingcheese2]

I'll give it credit. It was funny.

[@daffyphack]

Kids love a good infertility joke.

[@AH-be6bu]

That joke and execution would fit right into something harsher and aimed at adults, South Park for example. A would-be light hearted kids film, not so much.

[@troywright359]

someone has never seen the goonies or home alone before

[@kimaniwilsonhunte]

9:50 Big Lipped Alligator Moment, anyone?

[@Coratlan]

+Kimani Wilson-Hunte The entire movie is a Big Lipped Alligator Moment

[@walkingcorpse1224]

Haha ya that song came outta nowhere! We all know it's because they wanted to show off their country music skills, but anyways, I just wanted to say that the Big Lipped Aligator in All Dogs Go To Heaven had a purpose... He ate Carface at the end of the movie... Plus his song was badass when him and Charlie first met XD Idk why Nostalgia Chick chose this to represent when something random as all hell happens, but honestly I thought that the Aligator was one hell of a nice touch that I enjoy everytime I see this film lol.

[@rottengrapes8605]

This movie is like an April fools joke.

[@detricksadlerjr7964]

+The Inexorable Prince ikr

[@GermanLeftist]

+Popcorn Kitty A very bad April fools joke.

[@DigiRangerScott]

Elijah Wood's Movie Fights episode was released today. Also don't forget he'd become the voice of Wirt on Over the Garden Wall. Know what I'm Tolkien about?

[@ssdaaFaf2]

+Scott Sandler Lol I was thinking the same thing.

[@wombatjo3022]

+Scott Sandler I'll let you get away with one bad pun, just don't make a Hobbit of it.

[@DigiRangerScott]

And wait, I thought Lionel Hutz was the lawyer, not Artie Ziff!

[@timothywong7280]

+Scott Sandler just watched that Movie Fight Episode, one of the very best!

[@sophiegerlofs4611]

12:45 why?

[@TheSteelMagnum]

Shitty movie or not, Elijah's acting is very good.

[@conniecastro4323]

Ya think?!

[@stefansauvageonwhat-a-twis1369]

It felt legit when he was asking why he was going to be flashed for Hawaï

[@deuce5546]

@Joe Stewart-Paul My man Willis?

[@queencancerous5332]

He’s a genuinely good actor, explains why he kept getting roles as he got older

[@PurpleMoonFlute]

Even he couldn't save this movie though

[@Herodegon]

"Your balls stick to your legs like crazy glue!" A FAMILY Picture

[@PeanutBuny27]

Y’know for kids!

[@samuelbarber6177]

Why doesn’t he drop by Britain, where everyone drinks tea, wears bowler hats, references the Queen in every sentence, lives in London or the countryside, and the TVs show nothing but James Bond, the Royal family, Harry Potter, Monty Python or whatever.

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

Or how about Canadian stereotypes, in which everyone drinks Tim Hortons coffee, plays hockey, puts maple syrup on everything, is always polite and where winters are always brutal?

[@kalebsantos-felgenhauer1631]

Is this the ghost Bruce Willis from the sixth sense is that how he appears all around the world maybe he just goes around and helps kids

[@Scout-164]

Kaleb Santos-felgenhauer I guess that could make sense if this was a prequel to the Sixth Sense, but I guess he would be trying his hard to not swear.

[@hansruhlmann454]

Don't you mean that The Sixth Sense is a prequel to Noth?

[@alexjewett7455]

Still wouldn't make it any less creepy.

[@catiseith]

Oh, man. That movie is incredible. It's like taking the most ridicule cultural stereotypes form old cartoons and mashing them together in a single movie.

[@ElGandalfTheGrey]

I had a panic attack and puked out my breakfast when my parents were arguing once (although it was a way more intense fight than in the movie), it can be a harsh thing to witness when you're a kid..

[@ElGandalfTheGrey]

***** Yes they did ! :p

[@quintinbenkovitz6295]

+James Brincefield Yes it did!

[@cybertronguy98]

+Badbadger wow that's nuts

[@lemmys.kelton8183]

Here loosen his pants

[@fiadhearthpony6177]

my parents argue rarely so even now at 15 I get panic attacks when they do

[@ZorotheGallade]

17:34 That's what us Internet denizens call a "nope".

[@juishydomangoes8623]

The Amish joke is amazing. The timing of the plane leaving is great.

[@kino_verite]

I don't blame the actors in this movie. I just blame everything else in this movie. Anyone else agree?

[@redfeildre349]

+LegoDude2011 People like to blame actor for bad movies but actors have to work with what they are given.

[@kino_verite]

Redfeild RE true...

[@alt-centristintellectualfe3621]

+Redfeild RE BUt dont they accept the script before? I dont blae the actors for anything (except for bad acting). I blame teh script and direction. BUt dont those actors accept those scripts?

[@alt-centristintellectualfe3621]

***** Well, thats pure bullshit. (Not your comment, but their situation)

[@MsSphinx91]

+samlucky16 One rewrite to rule them all, and in the darkness...bind them....

[@InazumaDash]

That Texas family is what people in the 1910's thought of the US in Europe. "All them cowboys singing and diggin' out guld while we're starvin' Damn those yanks!"

[@thekinggotrickrolld]

I'm not gonna lie...I laughed at the Amish part... But everything else in that movie was just stupid...and I usually like politically incorrect humor.

[@ColonelCarnage]

Are they the actors from Witness?

[@Dane_Youssef]

@@ColonelCarnage That was the joke.

[@gageperuti5519]

Yeah, the Amish part was worth a chuckle. Too bad everything else was the anus of comedy.

[@rustym.shackelford5546]

Politically incorrect humor - when done right - makes people laugh despite the subject (I am often fond of some myself - but can't post here due to policy terms - y'know).

[@spencer10182]

North's main problem isnt its use of politically correct humor, it's the fact that there just isnt anything funny about the humor and this is from the same guy who directed awesome comedies like This is Spinal Tap and When Harry Met Sally.... Even The Princess Bride had some well done bits of subtle humor.

[@klimmr]

14:05 GET IT! ALASKA HAS ICE AND ICE IS SLIPPERY!!!

[@gradeacontent-o1751]

oh, now i get it

[@jenniferpoczik5995]

Ohhhhhhhh, that's not funny.

[@NFHDonLawl3]

*still not funny

[@JordanMacfarlane]

I didn't laugh at that part 😑 I just love the nostalgia critic reaction 😁

[@Lunaneko.14]

Now we know which movie gave Ebert the cancer he died of

[@LaraCazarts]

Daaaang. lol XD

[@98953812]

Ashley McGuire DAMN Hinata, I had no idea you could be a STRAIGHT-UP SAVAGE. Sorry Ashley, I couldn't resist XD

[@actionstudios9502]

Oh my God 😂😂😂

[@FillBar]

This is the reality where Butch had to hide from Marsellus Wallace disguised as a bunny.

[@Battury]

This movie is like a bad sitcom with no laughtrack. Everyone delivers their lines like they know they're supposed to be telling a joke, but the joke never comes, and neither does any laughter. I can't tell which is worse, this movie, or the pilot episode of Mulaney.

[@SteeZy644]

I'm so surprised that show ended up sucking from such a talented comedian like Mulaney. I guess standup to sitcom doesn't work for everyone.

[@MerryMaddMen]

oh you mean modern family?

[@SteeZy644]

ChangelingTale the commenter I kinda like modern family, which benefits from having no laugh track imo

[@Oliviagarry69420]

Adrian Adams Christ I remember that show my mom was not a fan because they were making fun of Christians and I wasn't a fan because they cancelled American Dad for Mulaney I completely forgot because it's so forgettable but now I'm salty again

[@SteeZy644]

Olivia Garry isn’t American dad still on? They just moved it to tbs

[@themichael8116]

The worst joke of all time? Turtle.

[@shershahad2152]

The Michael AM I NOT TURTLY ENOUGH FOR THE TURTLE CLUB

[@SirKirk2000]

The Michael he repeats the word turtle over and over again.

[@grubyichudy8035]

The Michael no you saved us with your butt from Breadwinners is the worst joke of all time

[@trillfa9774]

Turl. Tuuuurrrrrrrrrl!

[@laughingfurry]

No. Worst joke is from Problem Child 3. Bully's big cousin shows up during a dance, Junior says "Who let the T rex out of Jurassic Park?" I was at an age when I enjoyed the gross and obnoxious humor of Garbage Pale Kids. Yup. Even when I liked that movie, my reaction was "what?" when that joke came on. Then again, Problem Child 3 was shit all the way through.

[@darklordofsword]

ok, so I'll admit it, the "these boys art thy new brothers, who art named 'Ezekiel'." bit did get a snort out of me.

[@jeniferjoseph9200]

Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone!

[@kingrichardiii6280]

when I was a kid that scene confused the fuck out of me because i didn't know Amish/ Mennonites spoke German, Penn. Dutch and English. So when the guy says "I am deine father"" Diene mother" "Deine brothers" i thought he said "I am Daniel father, and this is Daniel mother, and these boys are Daniel brothers named Ezekiel"

[@edwarddore7617]

Been spending all my life living in an Amish paradise

[@cheneethompson5756]

@@kingrichardiii6280 omg, me too! I was like, "wtf?" And died laughing!

[@SallyB_23]

It’s actually pretty understandable that the kid would start panicking if his parents argue all the time, because when parents argue that much it literally tears kids’ worlds apart and they feel like they’ve done something wrong or like their lives are being uprooted. So yeah, it’s not unusual AT ALL.

[@spencerhensley5495]

I don’t really think his parents are arguing in the most literal definition. Just more venting to each other about their hard days at work. Granted I can’t imagine any good parents ignoring a kid for that long but they do give him some attention when he does have his panic attack which to me makes this movie not work. In Home Alone for instance that worked because the kid was rude to his parents and they were also just as disrespectful to him and took the side of his bully brother. So you understand why he doesn’t want his parents around and it feels somewhat legitimate and relatable. These are just two hard working parents who don’t pay attention to their kids for five minutes at the dinner table and they are portrayed as the worst parents in the world. Just doesn’t make sense.

[@lowpolyzoe]

So Hawaii appeals to people into gay hentai?

[@imveryangryitsnotbutter]

+Shade Ninja So, shotacon then.

[@jovialbard3001]

+puffle power Yeeesssss~

[@Donnyvoon]

+Shade Ninja Must have been a very young UberDanger

[@fighisver]

+Shade Ninja Well it was a reference to the sunscreen brand with the dog pulling the girls bathing suit down. But it's such a bad, out of place, nonsensical joke. You can't even call it a joke because it's objectively not funny.

[@janrupertalfeche8959]

+puffle power more like yaoi shotacon~

[@sfighter0085]

Gene Siskel really described this movie perfectly in the first few seconds of the review.

[@mindshuffler3332]

Wouldn't we all benefit from a Bruce Willis advisor?

[@Silver-plated8]

I feel like he would just tell me if you’re going to die die hard over and over again.

[@mrcritical6751]

He’d just keep telling me to put Die Hard off of my Christmas watch list

[@NewSuperAvenger]

"Loosen his pants." "I WAS FROZEN TODAY!"

[@hellishproductions4472]

I hate to admit it, but the Floor It part with the Amish had me dying

[@aussieman3021]

That's easily the only genuinely funny part of this otherwise loathsome movie.

[@rookiewarrior6419]

17:26 okay this movie was awful, but that scene was legitimately funny.

[@buddyisbored2355]

I just listened to Weird Al's Amish Paradise. it made the joke x100 better.

[@brookepartlow5608]

You know what? I can imagine North West (the spawn of Kim and Kanye) divorcing her parents in the future...

[@alacnaythegreat1054]

Oh god, it's a prophecy!

[@Kimmy0721]

I wouldn't be surprised! But she can't until she's 16...

[@docdave15]

Wait a minute... in this movie in the Hawaii scene, they say that people from the main land just don't care about Hawaii anymore.... WHAT?! People stopped caring about Hawaii? Probably THE most sought after vacation spot, next to Disney World and people stopped going there and they have a tourist problem!?

[@kylem1112]

It's extremely overrated and the locals hate tourists. especially if you are white. so... no thanks.

[@MonsterDawg79]

This movie...This is legitimately the first NC review that actually got me angry. Not because of the NC, mind you, but because this movie is just that infuriating. It's the only one that made me feel filthy going out of.

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

Same here. Now I feel like putting on Coco, Encanto, or some other culture exploring children's movie to cleanse my soul of this politically incorrect filth.

[@EaglesMan710]

I think the plane touching the window scene would have worked if people who saw the plane coming got scared and ran away, building up tension, only to reveal it was all for nothing.

[@killerbee2562]

Dan Aykroyd has sure been in his fair share of bad movies.

[@spencer10182]

Not to mentioned he even directed a bad one Nothing but Trouble although I admit I actually like that one because it is so bad. Sadly like North director Rob Reiner Aykroyd had a couple of good flicks in the 90's but this was the decade where both of their careers took a sad decline.

[@andrewbloom7637]

@@spencer10182 And it would only go from bad to worse for both of them in the following two decades. After "Ghostbusters: Afterlife", Dan should permanently ditch comedies entirely (he is pushing 70, and his brother Peter recently passed away). Mind you, comedy launched his career and got him established as a star (and he has done several non-comedies here and there), but all the same, there has to be a line drawn somewhere regarding his future work. Also, permanently ditching comedy entirely for non-comedic films and TV series should help reignite his career, balance his filmography out and improve his critical and commercial standing, as most of the films he has appeared in since the '80s have underperformed either critically or commercially, or sometimes both. Shaving his head bald (or keeping his hair closely cropped, if and when asked to let it grow back) wouldn't hurt either, as it ought to help reinvent his image by shedding his current look of resembling somebody's grandfather.

[@almightyk11]

And yet he had the gall to try to get everyone fired who worked on the Belushi movie

[@andrewbloom7637]

@@almightyk11 You're talking about the 1989 film "Wired", right? Most of the cast and crew members survived the film and have since had successful careers.

[@almightyk11]

@@andrewbloom7637 Yeah that one. He still tried though

[@kyleflanagan963]

I totally agree that this is amongst the worst movies out there, but I will say to it's credit that the "It was all a dream" angle actually slightly improved it (not that I would ever accept such lazy writing but...). See, all the horrible stereotypes actually make sense. The Eskimo thing, the amish thing, the texan thing, everything in the movie is all how a little child who has never seen any of these things except for the snippets that the world has told him, which his subconscious mind puts together into something that is a ridiculous stereotype. If they played up that element more, dropped the stupid "there's no place like home" crap that I've seen a million times, and gave the movie good direction and better writers...the idea could actually be very interesting.

[@mozigyar]

You know, look at this movie as a character study about a deeply racist boy. It becomes leagues better.

[@klimmr]

Is this what a movie would look like if Trump directed it?

[@almightyk11]

@@ARCtheCartoonMaster Wouldn't it be great if people stopped throwing around words so they don't lose their actual meaning? XD

[@JoakimOtamaa]

​@@klimmrHard to guess that you voted that bint this year.

[@klimmr]

@JoakimOtamaa Do you say that for any woman running for office?

[@JoakimOtamaa]

@@klimmr Hey, I'm from Finland we already had a woman president. No complaints about her, even tho she looks like Conan O'Brien. Kamala was just that, kamala. It's a Finnish word for terrible, makes sense to me.

[@cjhs2006]

I Love Bruce Willis in Disney’s The Kid,&,as Spike From Rugrats go Wild

[@jeremiahjackson2743]

So *THIS* is where the "Worst Joke Ever" clip came from!!!!

[@kimifw58]

People are using this clip?

[@KimonoFlareonGX]

18:04 19:34 21:34 This review has some of Doug’s best reactions.

[@vidhead85]

Oh my gosh! The Siskel & Ebert review is just...wow...that's how I feel about Michael Bay films!

[@AJARyan-yn2uv]

This movie goes to show just how important a script is to a film’s success.

[@Mrenderboyo]

2:16 nobody’s talking about how he perfectly replicates the Tobey Maguire scream before it even existed

[@somerandofromoregon]

Eh. It’s a bit different

[@AKatNamedKuckoo]

Fun fact: While many people know about many of the big names in this film, but there are a few names in this film you might know. - The actor that played the Amish father? That's Alexander Godunov, in his final film role before his death in 1995. You might remember him as Daniel Hochleitner in Witness and as Alan Rickman's second-in-command, Karl in Die Hard. - The actress that played his wife? None other than Charlotte Blackwood herself, Kelly McGillis! Funny enough, she also appeared in Witness, as the female lead, Rachel Lapp. - The unfortunate actress that played Ms. Ho? LAUREN TOM. Some might recognize her as Lena St. Clair in The Joy Luck Club, Julie from Friends and Dot from Grace Under Fire. However, she's most well-known for her voice acting roles. Dana Tan from Batman Beyond, Amy Wong from Futurama, Gizmo and Jinx from Teen Titans, Numbuh 3 from Codename: Kids Next Door, and as Minh and Connie Souphanousinphone in King of the Hill.

[@gageperuti5519]

THAT WAS NUMBUH 3?! Oh, that hurts.

[@MollyOKami]

The sad thing is that the whole "dream" revelation is the only thing that can excuse (well, not really) the many stereotypes & plot holes in this movie. Only a childish mind would see the world this way.

[@cyborgninja5489]

Ooh u got em

[@alvexok5523]

That Winchell kid with the glasses didn't even exist in North's real world, he was never seen in the awake scenes before North fell asleep in that chair at the mall. You could really see that it was a dream right after Bruce Willis' Easter bunny left because of the on screen effects, whatever you call them that are the wavy air accompanied by a harp sound.

[@MrDruism]

I love critics reaction on the reveal that it was all a dream! His freak out was hilarious!

[@ss4gogeta05]

“The defense rests” 😂😂😂That is one of my favorite pathetic movie jokes of all time.

[@grkpektis]

When I was a kid I thought movies were either boring or great nothing in between, then I saw North. It was the first time I realized oh movies can be horrible

[@IamARobot7]

8:25 this scene actually has another joke hidden. February is usually the month of lent and therefore fasting. Thats why "Buck hated february". ...Still doesnt change the fact it aint funny though.

[@Incred_Canemian]

Bruce Willis is a ghost cliche

[@Bfratman]

If anyone is familiar with Rob Reiner he would be known from his past work such as The Princess Bride, This is Spinal Tap, Stand by Me, When Harry Met Sally, Misery, and A Few Good Men. And then he made this movie. I don’t think his directing career recovered from that.

[@spencerhensley5495]

American President which was his very next film was actually pretty good. Not as good as his pre-North movies but still very good, great writing and performances, and then The Bucket List was ok. That was his last true hit, with audiences that is. It did well at the box office but not with critics. For me I remember thinking it wasn’t quite worthy of Nicholson Freeman and Reiner’s talents but it was very watchable and pretty enjoyable overall. But yeah everything else has bombed.

[@DrDolan2000]

12:15 literally the best part of the whole movie

[@haydenboggs3271]

But that disturbing billboard sure isn't

[@taqu]

"What gives you the right to show my crack on every highway?!" No. No. No. Noononooo. This movie is really obsessed with Wood's ass.

[@spencerhensley5495]

That joke to me along with the Alaskan sequence was what was most offensive about this movie. A lot of the other jokes just weren’t funny. They tried too hard and failed. But that one to me was just disgusting. I know it’s supposed to be a spoof of old sunscreen commercials but it’s at the expense of potential parents intentionally and selfishly humiliating their kid and it’s not funny. It’s downright sick.

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

Somebody call Chris Hansen.

[@ToruKun1]

Is it sad that I got to see this at a drive-in when I was five and the fake-out ending where it looks like North and his parents get shot made me cry so bad I had to be taken home?

[@jesusrox4u]

I’ll admit I feel sorry that happened to you, but I’ll admit your comment also made me laugh. I’m sorry. Is that bad for me to say?

[@eddieolshefski6467]

@@jesusrox4u A little bit. The poor soul was just a little kid.

[@jesusrox4u]

@@eddieolshefski6467 I know. I feel bad for finding the comment funny. Also, I meant a little funny and not a lot.

[@spencerhensley5495]

Considering you were a little kid, no and that particular scene is one of many problems with this movie. This movie was intended for children and having a subplot like that where they are trying to kill a child in a film for this audience is just completely unnecessary and way too dark for a children’s film. Plus considering the ending it doesn’t event make any sense.

[@Bauglir100]

2:17 He screams harder from a panic attack than from getting stabbed with a Morgul-blade.

[@nerdcave6797]

Incredible how some of the worst movies ever have some of the biggest stars ever

[@rkirk]

11:41 The "straight A's" joke made me smile, honestly.

[@cheneethompson5756]

So funny!

[@spencerhensley5495]

I laughed because of how stupid it was.

[@numbjuhnu]

''I'm an easter bunny'' ''And I'm a hobbit, blow me'' Idk why but that sudden sentence almost made me laugh myself to death.

[@BigAL68xyz]

7:00 Hey, they had to have a top-notch follow-up to a piece of comic GOLD like "they took it lying down!" And kudos for using footage from Weird Al's UHF, one of the more underrated comedies of the 80s.

[@zebefreod871]

But, in a way, it all makes sense: what if he was delusional, thinking everyone loved him, that he was the best at everything only to have his dream show us how ignorant and mediocre he was? Maybe his parents ignoring him was just to explain how he can't cope w/ not being at the centre of the universe :/

[@bchristian85]

A lot of kids have that kind of view of themselves, and I think that's what the movie was trying to portray. The movie wasn't trying to show realism or complexity at all.

[@peteradox4812]

0:21 critic before watching north 22:23 critic after watching north

[@JW-do2wc]

From Spinal Tap To Princess Bride to Misery, Reiner's directing reputation was never the same after North.

[@avanishdutta2658]

Stand by me, 1986.

[@avanishdutta2658]

A few good men, 1992.

[@moomooold]

"FLOOR IT" best joke in the movie. it made me chuckle

[@jalex.musica]

In case you guys didn't get the joke on the crack, it's a reference to an old ad of Jodie Foster as a child getting her swimsuit bottoms tugged by a puppy.

[@57yearoldjamesbond]

*uh*

[@liampatrick3110]

That was HER?

[@bulatao195]

You mean the Coppertone logo?

[@OliverTCrowe]

@@bulatao195 Yeah, my first thought was that it played on the old Coppertone logo with...what was it, a crab doing the same?

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

​@@OliverTCroweI think it was a dog, actually.

[@TheAtemAndrew]

14:38 The shere absurdity of them whistling the theme for the Andy Grittith show was honestly more amusing than it should be.

[@wolfgangervin2582]

As much as I appreciate the efforts of channels like LesiureSuitRantFiend and NostalgiacriticRUS, it's nice to see some of the classic reviews get an official upload.

[@samuelbarber4154]

That's why Buck hated February, they've put comedy on a level we cannot comprehend, Ha.

[@DarknessIsTheTruth]

The comedy IS incomprehensible, I'll give you that.

[@cheneethompson5756]

Because February's very short It's still not funny, tho

[@Wishbone4evr]

"That's nothing! You should see what Sarah Palin does with her kids." LMFAO!!!!! 🤣

[@HeyInternetErichere]

"Loosen his pants." Oh, if only North's dad was played by Kevin Spacey. And I really wish there was a scene where North was adopted by the Indian character from Short Circuit, still played by Fisher Stevens.

[@endergeek236]

You're telling me that Rob Reiner, the guy who made The Princess Bride and A Few Good Men , two of my all-time favorite films , made this?!!

[@hd_harold7587]

This is why Frodo was possessed by the ring. He came from a troubled home.

[@zeitgeistindustries1792]

"Judge can we have a recess?" "Of COURT you can." No that's the worst joke ever.

[@quasarpulse8403]

Well I wouldn't judge if you had recess...just don't break a branch climbing a tree...

[@zeitgeistindustries1792]

Quasar Pulse no like a court room res... OOOHHHH I GET IT!

[@TheGoldenNeil]

Apparently, the actress who played Mrs. Ho didn't hear and/or get the joke about her being barren, and that's why she turned around when Mr. Ho said it.

[@squeaktheswan2007]

For a film called North, this sure went South.

[@nathanielpatterson-rc9dq]

Good one. That joke was definitely better than those in this film.