CHATTY VLOG: feeling overwhelmed, new home projects, current reads & more!

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[@ballroomred]

Just keep in mind, every new issue you unexpectedly find is something that won’t sneakily come back to bite you later! You’re gradually making your house more safe and sound, and that is priceless.

[@CarterSullivan]

Honestly, that is such a good way of looking at it!!

[@amberjean9370]

My fiancé and I bought an older home about 8 months ago and what helped us is only doing two to three projects every 3 months and also reminding each other that we will be here for awhile and that we have SO much time to make it ours. I hope this helps and wanted to say you guys are doing an amazing job 🙂💛

[@CarterSullivan]

Love this way of looking at it! Truthfully the AMOUNT of projects doesn't stress us out much ironically, I know that there is plenty of time to make it ours. I think growing up in a 100 year old home helped with that, it's what I'm used to! It's more just the constant new issues we keep finding! Like finding out our deck has rotted just when we felt like we were making progress lol. Having to constantly re-prioritize your projects can be overwhelming to me as a Type A person! I feel like we have a really good balance on doing home projects luckily but right now we have alot of high priority projects that need to be done before winter!

[@jilliciousc5779]

Having grown up in a 120yr old home and my first two home purchases were older homes, the thing that helped me the most is to picture household projects as part of a relationship and more of a practice than a project that is eventually done. As others mentioned, we would pick 2 or 3 things to work on every year. The discomfort of your impatience will probably be the biggest challenge for you because, even if you had limitless funds, it still takes time. The home is much a part of your family as the dogs and each other. Your care of it is a practice in mindfulness. You will also redo the same work over and over but the character, history, energy, charm and warmth are SOOO worth it.

[@CarterSullivan]

I definitely feel like growing up in 100 year. Old house has also been so helpful for me at realizing this is marathon, not a sprint. My parents are still doing projects now and have been in the house for 20 years. I probably should've specified that the source of my overwhelm is not the amount of projects we have to do because honestly that's just what you get into when you buy an older home. It's just the constant re-prioritizing and finding more and more things that previous owners covered up. But overall, I feel like we have great awareness that it's going to take years to fix everything up and we are by no means in a rush!

[@simplyellenxo95]

Loving these normal day vibes…so cozy and comfy…very pleasant to watch.😊

[@lashantacox2552]

Your wisdom with money and home purchasing is beyond your years and it’s refreshing.

[@CarterSullivan]

This is so kind. Thank you! I'm definitely not perfect by any means, but I try my best 🥹

[@katem2583]

I live in the city and pay a disgusting amount in rent, at this point I would do anything to own my own home. In the same breath I know that if I owned my own home and had to strip and stain the deck I would probably cry… at least once. I think two things can be true you can be grateful for your home and also frustrated and overwhelmed by it. We are all human and therefore complex and nuanced. Thank you for sharing your complexities 😊

[@CarterSullivan]

Thank you for sharing this! It's so true, two things can be true! 💕 Yea so many tears were shed after spending HOURS stripping and sanding the deck only to find out that the wood had rotted... it was so disheartening putting in all that work just to throw away the project🥲

[@SaraList-jw4ob]

its so hard to have so many ideas and projects that you want to get done to be able to relax and just love your house, but omg it takes sweat, tears, and yearsss.

[@CarterSullivan]

Honestly that part is easy to me, I love dreaming and planning out projects, but the hard part for me is just continuously finding things wrong that need to be fixed that were covered up by previous owners! Thats the frustrating part to me😅

[@TaylahLouiseBudgets]

Without the nightstands, you can put a shelf above the bed to keep this layout that way you can still add a tall dresser for storage!

[@celestebradshaw6030]

Even in our newer home (2004) it can feel like every time we turn around there's a $1000 problem to fix. Just in the last month we had termites, a roof leak, and subsequent dry wall damage that all had to be fixed. Of course those things can all feel overwhelming, but it sounds like you have a healthy grass on the realities of it, as well as a good relationship with your partner where you can support each other through it. No one (who matters) thinks you're ungrateful. You're doing a great job!

[@maremchale]

I hear what you’re saying about the frustration of your home and projects but not wanting to appear tone deaf as you mentioned. As a gentle reminder from a therapist, two things can be true at once. We can love our home, be grateful to own a home and recognize our fortunate position to own a home. AND we can be down, frustrated, overwhelmed etc with it. Both can be true at the same time. You’re allowed to be grateful and overwhelmed at the same time or you can love your home while also feeling like it’s all a lot all at once. You’re human ❤ I also commend you both for communicating with each other and recognizing your feelings together. ❤

[@CarterSullivan]

Yes, definitely aware of this after many years of therapy!! I am always reminding myself that 2 conflicting feelings can coexist!

[@RebeccaABeaudoin]

Feel you. Moved this week and our 1.5 year old home is feeling more of a fixer upper. Something new everyday.

[@Zuzu48101]

Hi Carter! I enjoyed your blog, thank you for your honesty about the challenges of having a fixer upper, but I think that is really cool and brave that you guys decided to take that on & I’m also learning from your situation! My husband and I are going through home issues as well, you guys are definitely not alone 😊 Impressed that you only had to spend $3 for the Amazon birks, nice find! 🎉 Wishing you the best on your home journey and everything & hope you have a great week! Much love from Chicago 🫶

[@raeraemillstone]

I really resonate with your fixer upper. It can be so stressful. I have no advice as i feel so overwhelmed and as soon as something is done its like on to the next .. what i feel i need to do is to celebrate the small wins and the things that get completed. Your doing that here by vlogging .. your doing amazing live watching you . Very comforting

[@CarterSullivan]

Yes, definitely take the time to celebrate the winds no matter how small they are! I've put off painting our closet for months and so I finally did it this week and had a big glass of wine to celebrate!! Positive reinforcement 🤣👏🏻

[@raeraemillstone]

@@CarterSullivan girl you inspire!! Keep it all coming !! I save up your videos to watch on the tough days!! ❤️

[@raydelismorales8138]

Hi Carter! You should do a video on your all time favorite books by genre! Like all your 4-5 star books

[@CarterSullivan]

I have in the past but my thoughts/opinions on books always change as I read new ones so old favs may not stand the test of time. Its easier to just post my book reviews on IG now! I have highlights by year that have all my book reviews😊

[@Bornraisedfloridian]

Do not worry about other people, this is about your and your journey with the house. I and probably many other people are very understanding. I love a raw journey you can always talk to us! Everyone has struggles and you are entitled to vent.

[@CarterSullivan]

❤️❤️❤️

[@sarahchartrand9398]

I'm currently house sitting at a place with a stoner/music garage. The guy has a band with friends and they play in here. It's fixed up with old furniture that they replaced with newer stuff, and it's such a cool vibe! Maybe you can use your night stands for something like that?

[@sloaneey123]

Definitely relate to the feeling of 1 step forward and 10 steps back with owning a home! And our house isn’t actually that old just the previous owners hadn’t done anything properly so we’re constantly finding new issues. Hang in there, you’re still making progress even when it feels like you aren’t!

[@TheMooresDaily]

Thank you for sharing about the spice level in books! There’s a lot of people that helps :)

[@CarterSullivan]

Good to know!! I like it extremely spicy but I know some prefer closed door romance books so I'll keep sharing it when I do book reviews!

[@AnahiKaren]

My house was built in 1978, I have been able to replace all windows, new roofing, and get stucco done but oh boy I got so much to do and I have been here since 2019. But it is my 1st home and on a very tight budget. I love when you share your experiences renovating❤

[@amcvans]

We bought a 200 year old house and it’s definitely overwhelming. Ours was cosmetically very nice but the more we live here the more we see needs to be done and it’s a daily discussion over what to do first. Everything it needs is at least 15k too which is a little sucky. My husband thinks the house is a fixer upper but I think it’s just “rustic” 😂 at the end of the day though I think about how lucky we are to live in a house so old and with so much character. I remind myself that most things don’t need to be done immediately (and those that do become the priority). It’s hard to chip away at it slowly but it makes it more rewarding. ❤ coming from a condo though it’s unreal how much more a house needs!!

[@hannahperkoengel]

Thanks for the book rec of Expiration Dates! I’ll check it out 😊

[@audraweigand614]

As someone who also bought an older home recently, 100% relate to your frustration of finding things wrong that the previous owners didn't address or covered up. We literally have a part of our siding gone that they just put a granite slab in front of instead of repairing it. Like why?!

[@CarterSullivan]

Honestly sad others go through this but really helps me feel less alone so I appreciate you sharing 🥹 LITERALLY US- like why is there flooring on our bathroom wall ffs

[@audraweigand614]

@@CarterSullivan Thank you for posting about it because it helps me feel better, like I am not the only one who has found problems like this!

[@MadsBee3]

Husband and I are in a fixer upper, biggest advice if it’s a place you want to be for a while is take breaks! Don’t feel rushed to do it all at once, which I’m sure you feel more pressure being on social media too!

[@CarterSullivan]

Honestly I could care less what my house looks like for social media honestly which is great as a creator! I should have clarified that the amount of projects doesn't overwhelm me, just always finding new things wrong. But we have a great plan in place for fixing it up slowly and make sure we take lots of breaks and vacations when we can afford to to get away from the house!

[@MadsBee3]

@@CarterSullivan that makes sense! I didn’t mean how it looks I meant more like you probably get more pressure to keep doing projects. But yes breaks are important, you’re setting up for your future too with such a beautiful home! ❤️

[@crawfordjennifer2015]

Have a fun and safe trip! 🌼🦋

[@CarterSullivan]

Thank you! ❤️🫶🏻

[@crawfordjennifer2015]

@@CarterSullivan you’re welcome! 🦋🌼

[@stephaniewilson1479]

We lived in a 1944 rental for 3 years … I was SOOO glad we didn’t own it bc it had so many issues but it was just such a fun place to live and I loved how much character it had. Now, we live in an ‘82 home and there’s definitelyyyy some issues (broken in-ground pool, hvac went out our first summer, etc) but we’re just working through slowly because we just love the house and know we’ll be here for a while. I appreciate all you share! It really motivates me to want to do stuff around our house!

[@stephaniewilson1479]

Also, I watch all of your videos and I’m sorry I never comment!!! But I love your personality and your content :)

[@ashleysmith1369]

It's hard to not compare yourself or what you have to others. I have a new home but I love the charm of an older home, I just dont have the money to do projects even if we bought a home much cheaper because its always a gamble on how much things will end up costing. So, I'm in my builder grade home which I LOVE but you get my point. I love your content.

[@jackeyreyes6534]

Absolutely love these chatty vlogs. I fee like I'm on the phone with a friend while I get stuff done. Also love that your videos are usually 30 min or more

[@CarterSullivan]

YAY love that 🥹❤️🫶🏻

[@hannahgracestudios]

YOU'RE SO CLOSE TO 100K!!! 😭

[@chandrareaux6700]

Well I thoroughly enjoyed the video! My parents bought a 1920s house and did a lot of repairs but my dad did most of the work and it turned out beautifully. My dad left that house to me after je passed away. Great video

[@LamiaElhoni]

I think the best way to approach renovation is by making a to do list for each zone in the house then creating a vision board to each one after that start tackling them by the easiest to the one that need most work because seeing what you're Suppose to do as a whole makes it easier on the mind and less mistakes or overspending on things that you don't need. ❤

[@CarterSullivan]

Yep I talked about this method many times before on my channel! This has always been how we have approached home projects, even when we were in the condo and updating it! I've talked about how we balance a high-priority project that has to be done with a more fun project just to make sure that we're keeping it fun for us as well. So, for example, we had to get our chimney removed but then we also did the bathroom which was a fun project. I probably should've specified that I was feeling overwhelmed, not by the amount of home projects, but just that we are constantly finding new things wrong and having to re-prioritize! 😊

[@bpal5644]

I would personally stick with the queen bed since it’s a smaller room and either put a tall boy or a floor standing mirror where the other nightstand is in the corner. I think a floor standing mirror would open the room up more, but the tall boy would probably be more practical if you’re short on wardrobe space?

[@CarterSullivan]

That's our current plan, to find a tall antique dresser for that corner :) We really need a bigger bed honestly, we barely fit on a queen so not upgrading is not really an option lol luckily a king isn't any longer, just wider :)

[@NxMaRiEOx]

I live in a home that’s 35ish years old that we are gradually renovating the whole thing. The previous owner applied a lot of lipstick so we have to completely redo a lot of things. I feel you with the frustration! Our time off is always a toss up of “do we do this project to get it done? Or do we go do something fun?” I literally just said yesterday I wonder what life is like to live in a house that needs no work 😂 but as my dad keeps reminding me, we have 30 years to get it done! Social media and keeping up with the joneses makes you feel like it has to be done so fast, but in reality it’s ok to take your time and go slow!

[@CarterSullivan]

Yes lipstick on a pig is our favourite way to describe our house😂

[@evenormandin8152]

Thank you for touching a bit on your home troubles! We don’t have a fixer upper per se, but we bought a 1960s duplex and it made me cry a bit recently haha! Mold behind furniture, carpenter ants, the roof that needs to be changed sooner than later (20k$)… it can be a lot!! Anyway, it’s reassuring to hear you! Good luck on your renos and thanks for keeping it real, as always :)

[@CarterSullivan]

I feel like sharing these thoughts does make all of us with home issues feel a little less alone which I do appreciate ❤️

[@Becky6066]

Hey Carter! I relate to what you were saying about owning an older home/fixer upper It’s so hard and isolating. We bought in 2022 and got slightly high interest rate and had to purchase our home 50 minutes from work I live in southwest Florida and homes are very overpriced right now. I’m torn between wanting to sell or keep it as long as possible because so many people our age can’t event afford a home in this economy. It’s tough. I have coworkers who bought in 2020 and coworkers who bought a decade ago, and it’s hard to not be jealous of all of them. I’m paying $$$ for a 2 bed 2 bath 50 minutes from the city and they all live 15 minutes from the top beach in the United States. So I’m with you. 😂

[@bhavikashah7065]

Looks like a book I need to read :) I've been reading a lot of intense books and I've been wanting something I can just get lost in stress free.

[@jennrob333]

Owning a home is always hard. Fixer upper or not. You always want to make it your own, there's always projects that seem out of reach, and things allllllwayyyys go wrong. You've got good bones and a place with character (which is next to impossible to make in a cookie cutter without a lot of $$) - you're both already ahead of the game :). We try to do our interior projects during the colder months and do some smaller outdoor ones in the summer. Summer is so short in Canada don't waste them stressing about things you can get to later

[@CarterSullivan]

Yes this is so important! Outdoor projects are the main priority right now with it being nice out 😊

[@SarahSchneider2]

That is so financially smart not fully counting for all your income in what size house you can afford. Because you never know something could happen and you won’t have as much as you thought per month

[@laceybeanreads]

Carter, I just finished All My Love by Morgan Elizabeth. I recommend it to you because it’s Noah Kahan inspired. I remember you going to his concert. There’s mentions of depression and alcoholism/sobriety, narcissistic parent and death of a parent (off page). These aren’t spoilers as the author mentions them in the intro. It has great mental health rep. Hope that you’re having a great day!

[@CarterSullivan]

Ou I'll have to look into it!

[@sarahoverstreet2895]

I don’t have an older home, but I will say there’s a Facebook group for literally everything! I know Facebook is like the outdated thing to be on nowadays, but there’s some awesome support groups of all different kinds on there so I’m sure you could find one for owners of old homes/fixer uppers! ❤

[@CarterSullivan]

Haha yes we are a part of many FB and Reddit groups for old homes! 😊

[@vintagechristmas8877]

When you get a book from a library , how long do you have to return the 📚book to the library ? 🤔 I think it's different in every country . Idk🤷🏻‍♀️ I was wondering there 😌 It came to mind when I saw it in the library. Which book series do you think I should start? I mean, which one do you think is better? throne of glass series or a court of thorns of roses by Sarah. I sometimes have a hard time with fantasy books because there are so many characters and places, so I don't read much, but I have this series and I haven't started it yet . Anyways , great video 🌼Thanks for sharing with us 😌

[@CarterSullivan]

3 weeks but I can renew it up to 3 additional times!

[@vintagechristmas8877]

@@CarterSullivan That's very short time . I asked a question about book series by the way 😊

[@CarterSullivan]

@@vintagechristmas8877 I can't really answer that question- I DNF'ed ACOTAR and haven't read Throne of Glass sorry

[@vintagechristmas8877]

@@CarterSullivan Oh I saw the throne of glass series in your library and I thought you read it , sorry 😌

[@torischerle]

Not sure what they are called but the narrow tables that go behind a couch, could be a good option instead of the bedside tables to throw a few things, like behind the headboard

[@CarterSullivan]

Omg thats genius! Matt could totally build one

[@mariahl.2052]

The century home Reddit and the old homes Reddit are wonderful communities you may be able to relate well to! :)

[@CarterSullivan]

I'm in both of them already and it's one of my favourite pages on Reddit!!

[@actgirl1234567]

❤❤❤

[@ryanrowe1975]

❤

[@kpatten100]

💖💖💖

[@christineg6123]

Can you add chapters to your videos? I dont read so I skip the book reviews but its annoying to skip around lol

[@CarterSullivan]

If I can figure out how I will!