Children of God: Inside the Mind of a Faceless Cult Leader

[@misslove432]

In my experience children don’t stop loving their abusive parent they stop loving themselves.

[@arin6479]

That is incredibly profound. As someone who was not subject to abuse in childhood, this made me finally understand some aspects I found difficult to wrap my head around. Thank you.

[@amanwell3619]

That is a sad but unfortunate hard truth. 💯😔

[@serkelley]

So well articulated. That’s very true

[@viciouslittlecirce8135]

this is incredibly accurate and absolutely a generational problem, also it is so true it made me cry a bit (adult child of emotionally abusive parent)

[@harlee9595]

As someone with cptsd from 2 abusive parents this is 100% true. As much as we want to we can't stop loving them we just get to a point we can't be let down any more so we learn to accept we wont ever recieve what we deserve. Acceptance can be a great thing but not when it comes at the cost of your own mental health.

[@jr103385]

Thank you so much for your incredibly brave story. I’m a first generation COG member who knew David Berg and his family from the early days. I joined at age 18 in 1969 and left from Ecuador in 1986 with my 3 children, ages 16, 6 and newborn. Needless to say it has taken years of healing that continues but I was fortunate to eventually get a college degree and have a career. My heart goes out to you and all those born and raised in the cult who suffered even greater horrors. You evidence real recovery that has not been the case for many former members of all ages. I also live in Mexico and would love to connect with you at some point. Bravo to your courage - keep it up!

[@serkelley]

Thank you so much for watching! I wish you so much peace and happiness

[@CultstoConsciousness]

Thank you for sharing. Would love to hear more of your story if you ever wanted to come on ❤️ [e-mail]

[@katwitanruna]

Break the silence. Break the cycle.

[@beverleybarclay7990]

Serna, you are truly amazing. I was raised as a JW and till 3 years and started watching videos like this and found out that there was such a thing as religious trauma. And I have continued to heal by listening to stories of other people,so thank you.

[@AthenaOwl_]

Love this series with Serena, as equally horrific it has been. I’m so sad to hear the cult still exists, even if it has changed, with its historical foundation. As a young mom, and thinking of Shelise as a young mother as well, it’s truly unimaginable what some babies and toddlers even have to endure. Thank you both for taking the time to share all of this. Even through the backlash seen on other platforms…

[@haylebales]

It's SO kind of you to make your poetry free to those who watched this! I've already read some and am LOVING IT!! My traumatic experiences have left me struggling financially because it's been so mentally and physically taxing, so this is truly a gift:). Thank you

[@serkelley]

Thank you so much for getting it and I’m glad you’re enjoying it! ❤

[@Jessicad9304]

I TOTALLY laugh as a trauma response to discomfort. It’s actually gotten me into trouble a few times lol.

[@tianna1116]

Oh my gosh SAME. It’s like a reflex and I can’t stop myself and depending on the reaction I might laugh even harder. It’s definitely made many situations/ conversations harder

[@seppyq3672]

I don't laugh, but I do get a big smile as a trauma response.

[@Spmama444]

This episode just hit so hard in the depths of despair…depravity and unspeakable horrors… But like all your guests…they Trade Trauma for Wisdom! Serena You are this, you are the embodiment of wisdom! So beautiful, such a delight, and a voice that will never be silenced…

[@JB-kg5gz]

After abuse, when we are safe and finally processing and healing, laughter is sometimes so we don't cry. Sometimes it's because we see how ridiculous some of the things they said and did really was. During the first period of my healing, I remember joking about writing a book about what happened, and telling someone it should probably just be a comedy play instead, because no one would believe the ridiculous stuff was real.

[@amanwell3619]

I binged the 3 eps because I was so engrossed. Thank you for sharing your story, Serena. And thank you, Shelise, for creating this platform & safe space for survivors to be able share. What an incredible story. I'm proud of all of the work you've done towards healing and for finding your voice. ❤

[@CultstoConsciousness]

❤️🙏

[@Dawn-fy7be]

Wow, amazing that you seem so normal and healthy and strong after going through all of that. You deserve a courage and bravery medal. Thanks for sharing.

[@debbyfazfphotography]

Out of all of the powerful survivor stories I've ever heard, Serena's has impacted me the most. I haven't commented yet simply because I've struggled to find the words to express my feelings. Feelings for that terrified child, Serena, who was raised inside of this terrible cult, who was unprotected by her parents or any other of the adult members. It boggles my mind how sick, disgusting and twisted people can become when brainwashed by a cult. It astonishes me how anyone could survive - let alone, thrive, after they've experienced true trauma, as you, Serena. I'm very happy you were strong enough to escape the cult and find peace and healing in your adult life. Good for you, Serena! You've overcome! You've won!!!❤🎉

[@serkelley]

I did win indeed! What a beautiful comment and thank you for watching!

[@debbyfazfphotography]

@serkelley 🥰

[@CultstoConsciousness]

❤️❤️❤️

[@debbyfazfphotography]

@@CultstoConsciousness 🥰

[@joannelson6334]

The abuse I suffered just in my family was very cult like even though we weren't in a cult. I was kept in control with trauma, fear. Because I was in a constant state of confusion so I did not have time to think for myself, to process what was happening to me. And then the beatings to my head caused so much damage its taken my whole life to figure things out. I think my mom was like a cult leader wanting to be on a pedestal/cherished. Abusive, but in reality she was either miserable or a narcissist and sociopath.

[@batyaswiftyasgur9500]

I commented on your first two interviews and this one was also amazing. You are articulate, brave, and astute. Your honesty and willingness to be vulnerable are inspirations to all of us. Kudos and much love. (And I can't wait for your memoir to come out.)

[@serkelley]

Thank you! I’ll come on again when my memoir is finished!

[@elisabethm9655]

Serena, Thank you for embracing the courage to come forward to share your memories. There’s so much to unpack for me personally as well as trying to come to an understanding of my own history and the reality of what happened in my childhood and that of my own children. As a baby boomer, I’m a member of your parents’ generation. The confusion and bizarre collage of violence, beauty, intimate pain and pleasure that you describe also marks my own history and I’ve come to feel, the experience of the generations that came before. I remember from the periphery the Jesus Freaks and while I was never attracted to your group, I am in no way surprised hearing about your experiences. I remember seeing sexualized children amongst my peers and I did understand that a boundary of normalcy had been crossed. So much strangeness. How we go forward into the future now with increasing understanding of what we’ve all been through is the question today. I appreciate your openness and it is transparency and genuine revelation of truth that is the ‘Light on the Path’. Born into a shattered world, we ALL struggle with the boundaries of right and wrong, then and now. You’re correct that facing the facts of our lives with compassion and strength is all we can do. Right now I’m focusing on forgiveness and gratitude as the key. I pray to one day to celebrate and mourn all of it. Both from and towards everyone and everything. 🫶🏼 Thank you. For your wisdom about the individual nature of healing and the care we must all exercise.

[@serkelley]

Thank you so much for commenting and I’m glad my story resonated with you

[@ceeceebeebee889]

I've listened to several podcasts over the years from people who grew up in this cult as children. Every story is just so horrifying.

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

Serena, so good you are talking here. It is all beyond belief. Compassion to you all. It is so important to keep talking.

[@midget_princess2200]

Such a brave woman. I have so much respect for all who stand up and speak out. I'd love to know more about how this chomo was brought up.

[@katwitanruna]

Liked. Shared. Commented. Sent the algorithm out to open people’s eyes.

[@DianaEvans-t7f]

Doing some cleaning up for the new year, I just finished the last two episodes, come to find out I'm early. I am blown away my Serenas absoloute strength and resilience, sad to know the cult is still around. Thank you for sharing your story!

[@serkelley]

Thank you for watching!

[@jennaforney3919]

I binged all 3 episodes at work today...thank you for such a real honest look into the cult..I had no idea! The children made to live life in such abuse I'd disheartening! Serena sharing about her work dealing with her trauma and the different types she used especially the first attempt and the poor response that's what I'm dealing with I wish there were equine therapy, I would love to try that..I can't do anymore horrible therapist when she said get up and move..I agree! Thank you serena what an eye opener!

[@debidrake5748]

Your an inspiration to many. Thank you for sharing , very brave and Im sorry to hear you got back lash . Very happy you choose equine therapy dear to my heart. As horses have helped me heal for years! Im so happy you were able to heal grow & share all the trama youve been through

[@serkelley]

Horses are incredible healers! I wish more people knew about this incredible modality!

[@kimcollins8021]

I read a book about children of hod in my teens I can't believe that this is still going! I think you 2 ladies are incredibly brave and utterly inspiring 👏 the awareness you are both bringing is great keep doing what you are doing and be proud of yourself

[@CultstoConsciousness]

Thank you so much!

[@lynnbowenrealestate]

Good job. What an inspiration You are.

[@emilyarriaga3086]

Such a good three episodes. Thank you for sharing your healing journey.

[@robertdaniel1234]

Amazing insider information, thank you for sharing

[@victoriaswanson2896]

Superb series of videos! I thoroughly enjoyed each segment with Serena. What a brave, bright and beautiful women. She is proof that the Spirit remains strong and clear, even through years of trauma, neglect and abuse. Bravo for doing the work to reclaim what others attempted to rob from you....your innocence, your autonomy and your power. 💜

[@BarbaraStöckl-b8n]

Thank you for your insights it's so important to unpack that to understand the way cults work ❤

[@harlee9595]

"Justice" is a privelege. One that unfortunately not everyone has access to

[@annettemarado3668]

These three interviews were incredible.

[@MoniqueBabyyy0913]

Yall are amazing!! The strength having to be strong in everything that she should have never had to be strong though ! ( no one should have to live that way EVER ! ) And she was so young 💔 All the respect and love from Sweden !!! 🙏🏽❤️

[@LarryBrightboy]

Tremendous channel, like you and Serena, each guest is so incredibly brave!

[@laurenl720]

Happy new year! ❤ thanks for sharing your story Serena.

[@mikaelamoyher5156]

Thank you for sharing your story ❤️

[@joannelson6334]

I get that. Wanting to be loved by my mother. But she never gave or showed me love. She was 92 when she passed.

[@nesser1352]

Please bring her back, I feel like there is so many more questions.

[@ozdavemcgee2079]

I grew up with COD coming undone in Australia i remember seein some "flirty fishing" comic type thing in the news . Ive studied History and Religion at a Tertiary level. Id consider COD has a fair bit of some if the cult publications available here and there existing still. Working musings here, but perhaps it could be a sunject in Humanities, Religious Studies, Social Sciences. Its quite the cautionary tale.

[@Bubba.mitchell4603]

That guy (I’m assuming cult leader) in the picture he’s so evil. He doesn’t even feel like a human. He’s in hell even before he’s dead it’s very disturbing.

[@kelliannawebb5738]

I might have missed it in all the interviews but what happened to Sarenas mother? Did she end up in jail or did she just disappear in the cult? If she wrote the book can’t she be punished? I am so sorry Serena for what you have been through.

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

HAPPY NEW YEAR 🌱

[@aliciadroogsma2064]

When you spoke of him being depicted with a lion head i couldn't help but think of the gnostic yaldabaoth!

[@hyena280]

The Phoenixes were in Costa Rica. I met someone in the 90's who knew them, and loved them.

[@joannelson6334]

Laughter is like medicine to the soul.

[@ginafrancis4950]

I just looked up Karen Zerby. Pictured with her husband she has a website touting her biblical acumen and love of Jesus. Writes of her initial beginning with cog. Makes my skin crawl! WTF???

[@sarastepp2705]

Omg 1:06:39 your puppy Is so pretty. I love her color and her coat is so shiny and smooth. She looks like she is the sweetest little lady. Do you mind sharing her name? I have 3 Australian Shepherd and they are my self care and they help my mental health so much.

[@larsonanne]

It shows as a comment on the screen right after she is shown with him on the screen: Oscar

[@CultstoConsciousness]

Oscar is the sweetest boy! We love him so much. He’s my emotional support doggy during interviews

[@sceneanimatronicmouse]

If David called me an old bottle, I’d call myself a role model.

[@deedee2284]

Fun fact: in antiquity flirty fishing was call sacred prostitution. Almost every religion had it, but its against biblical law.

[@KatherinePalms]

What a sweet dog❣️

[@fugician421]

Why doesn’t someone prosecute the mom since the book exists?

[@lisabever2115]

Cults are bad enough, but straight-up felony child abuse of this nature is a whole other thing. These adults who participate in this type of behavior are just evil. They know better. There is no way any sane adult could possibly rationalize this shit as being ok. God bless you.

[@debracubitt6191]

Happy New Year Peace calm hope

[@staudingerk]

You look great in fuchsia!

[@GabbyXena100]

This absolutely heartbreaking. I do have one question though: It sounds like the other children who were raised in this environment didn't seem to see a problem with having to do things like dance and strip tease for Berg, but you at a very young age seemed to realize that it wasn't okay. I'm just wondering how? If this was all you knew, why didn't it seem normal to you? I'm not saying you're lying or anything (I know some people don't believe you), I'm just genuinely curious.

[@tianna1116]

Dude what. How would she know what was going on in the minds of other children. If you’re asking her to speculate that’s one thing but maybe phrase it clearly

[@serkelley]

You are born with inherent inner knowing and intuition. But it’s also shamed and brainwashed out of you through extreme punishment in the cult. Cognitive dissonance was rampant . Just because other kids did it doesn’t mean they were ok with it. I would encourage you to look up past interviews with Amy Bril and Celeste Jones to hear about their experiences. FYI children are never ok with sexual abuse.

[@tianna1116]

@@serkelley you said what was trying to say but way better, thanks! This is what I was thinking

[@jennanail]

Davidito made the only moral choice. He chose to save many at the expense of one.

[@frau_ic]

I would like to take this opportunity to express my wish for an interview with Dr. Anna Salter. I think her insights and expertise can also help in the area of abuse in cults and cult-like environments.

[@CultstoConsciousness]

Thank you! We will look into it

[@robinnoble5409]

☹️ You do not allow your assault to happen

[@sssuperstacy]

Excuse me what is plant medicine?

[@serkelley]

Using various forms of indigenous plants to help with trauma. Ayahuasca, rape, kambo, etc. absolutely not recommended for everyone. Just what helped me along the way.

[@alanhowse9213]

The COD booklet are some of the maddest things ever written l would like you to talk about them Flirty fishing. Holy holes.

[@chrislondo2683]

Have you seen the puppet show they made?

[@ursulaking4411]

How could these people just move around and live in all these different countries? I am an immigrant and they were definitely not as welcoming of me during all the bureaucracy...

[@SallyImpossible]

The Flirty Fishing, prostitution to rich and powerful men, got them special favors

[@ursulaking4411]

@@SallyImpossible yeah but I mean, in so many countries, for so many people, for so many years?

[@Tara.Daktyl]

If you really want to ruin your day, look for Life with Grandpa puppet show.... 🤢

[@candacelee6523]

Is this Daniella’s sister?

[@LittleMissLounge]

No, but she mentioned taking care of Daniella when they were kids in the first video.

[@joannelson6334]

❤❤❤❤❤

[@Ai-teach1]

🎉🎉🎉

[@lindyjones]

Sending lots of love🩵

[@b.thompson6141]

You are doing very important work. Keep exposing the abuse. Best wishes. 🩷