Choppedliver - Veteran Reacts to Hi Ren

This is my very first reaction video! As a veteran and someone who has struggled with mental health issues, I found Ren's video inspiring. In fact it was a large part of why I decided to stop procrastinating and do something I have been wanting to do for years, which is start a KZbin channel.
Support me on Patreon:
/ choppedliver
My goal is to marry my girlfriend and travel the world. She is not in these videos, but you can follow our travel blog on Instagram here:
/ thewanderbaes
**The video I've reacted to **
• Ren - Hi Ren (Official...
Please support the original creator by visiting their channel
#RENegades #mentalhealth #renmakesmusic #veteran #depression
**Fair Use Disclaimer***
This is a reaction video, and as such is assumed to comply to the fair use doctrine, but if you are the owner of the reacted to video, and do not want us spreading the word about your channel and giving you free publicity, we'd be happy to take it down

[@soulless_swede]

Opening up and showing "weakness" is the very antithesis of weakness. As a fellow introvert with decades of mental health problems, I know how difficult it had to have been to turn on that camera and record this. Your self-doubt was unfounded, you did everything right, and I hope this new endeavor brings you closer to your goals. Well wishes from Sweden.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

This is a great point. Never really thought about it that way, and yes, it was extremely difficult. I have been ruminating about it for 2 months since I watched it the first time. My gf was about to give up on me, and I finally just did it. Thank you for your kind words and support.

[@margaretkichenama6022]

@@choppedliver_reactsHell …gonna fake it till I make it❤REN. Subbed

[@choppedliver_reacts]

@@margaretkichenama6022 damn right ❤️

[@zelenozubi]

💪♥️

[@Chrisinpommyland]

I’m 55, a suicide survivor and father, partner of an amazing woman and massive fan of Ren. He has helped me through deepest depression. I’m disabled and having surgery after surgery and Ren, chinchilla etc have been my constant companions. Keep this up brother, you will find people from all over the world. I’m from New Zealand.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

My deepest depression happened well before Ren. I wish I had Ren to help me through at that time. I can only imagine how powerful it would have been. So sorry to hear about the things you have been through. You live in an amazingly beautiful country. I want to travel the world with my soul mate and that's one reason I'm stepping out of my comfort zone, I hope this will help me achieve my goals, and New Zealand is one of my top destination goals

[@mikegonzales4199]

Let the healing begin, Brother. Big love to you & yours. P.S. change the name, you are not Copped liver.

[@elisabethforsberg9027]

I am a 68 year woman from sweden,i cried the first hundred times i saw Hi Ren,it helped me trough the hardest time of My depression ,i think you did a great job,i know how it feels,it is not a weeknes to cry,it is healthy in this world,and stop to beat your self up Love Elisabeth❤

[@elisabethstermo9396]

Hei Elisabeth fra Sverige. Godt å se andre her i Norden som vet om Ren. 👍 Jeg er 10 år yngre enn deg, og heter også Elisabeth 😊 hyggelig med en navnesøster. 👍 🇳🇴

[@bojnebojnebojne]

Agreed! Hugs from another Swede :) Eller, STOR Kram!! :)

[@kathyknight5236]

Welcome to KZbin. Ren has taught people, especially men, that it is ok to show emotion. It is ok to talk about your fears and be open. I’m 72 and my whole life, I would lie to people and say “I’m just fine” and give them a big Kathy smile. No one knew how I hated myself and had suicidal thoughts every day. I never thought I could do anything right. I resonate to so many REN songs and found out that I was not alone which has helped me. It is ok to cry and I appreciate your honesty.

[@melissagutierrez8137]

happy smile?

[@megraminiak1662]

You did fantastic. Your audio is solid, your video setup is great. Most importantly though, you let us, the viewer SEE YOU, really see your emotions and how the music impacts you. Congratulations on your first video, my friend! 48 year old Renegade and suburban mom here. Love your honesty and vulnerability. Ignore the haters. ❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

The renegades have double my follower count overnight. I am so deeply moved by all the comments. I haven't had a dry eye all morning. Thank you. 🙏

[@sheenadees2701]

You did a great job for your first video.And please don't take our suggestions as criticism.We're just trying to help you. But no , you did not suck on your first video❤

[@user-ey9bt1bn6n]

Ps. It’s so beautiful to watch people experience their first watch of hi ren, we have felt it as you have, I’ve watched reactions of ren up in the 1000’s now and I never tire of it. Great genuine reaction.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much. 🙏🙏🙏

[@MiltonWadams-w8k]

Dude, you got this! Great job!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Milton! LOL

[@sheenadees2701]

Honestly, I think that's what we need is more people showing their supposed weakness and sharing their burdens.I think the world would become a much better place with a lot less fighting if we did that.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I agree. Imagine if everyone showed strangers love like the people in these comments have shown me

[@PattiValentine86]

What a great first reaction! Thank you for being honest and raw. Looking forward to more ❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Patti, every comment I've received has been so full of love and positivity. I can't thank everyone enough. 🙏

[@adriansurtees272]

Be proud you broke the ice big fella, and the rawness is perfect, the polishing up will come in time. Seeing your emotions speaks volumes my friend. Keep at it, look forward to you next video.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Well, it was definitely raw I wish I could have said more about how I was feeling, but in the moment, it's hard to put how you feel into words. Thank you the encouragement!

[@adriansurtees272]

@@choppedliver_reacts Feelings can't always be verbalised. I still felt it Brother.

[@onefatasscheetah9606]

Honestly? I don't care about lighting or sound perfection. I find the IMperfection refreshing, actually. Everything is so overworked it loses its realness.

[@user-zu6ir6kj5g]

Well, here you are a day later and you've got yourself a few subscriber already - myself included. There are thousands of "Ren-egades" out there, and they'll be flocking towards you - so you're far from alone in your struggles buddy. He makes me weep too - he hits the nail so perfectly on the head. He exposes our "shameful" fragility to the light - and we find it's actually okay. I think my tears are a mixture of sadness that we carry this burden - and joy, in understanding that we don't have to carry it alone - we are NOT alone. One of the things Ren has given the World is to help us realise that it's okay to let others know that we're plagued with self-doubt, negativity, and psychological fragility - simply because we all are. Like Ren says in the epilogue, soften, relax, and that dance gets easier. You don't need too beat yourself up in solitude, it's the human condition - we're all in the same boat. I can't see you, or speak to you face to face, but be assured that there is love and compassion for you floating across the ether in your direction - it is there. Sincere best wishes to you, and for your new venture. You done great mate.

[@lysfleming3331]

I love Ren. He believes in raising people up. I'm here for you.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

🙏🙏 Thank you Lys. I'm at work right now hiding from coworkers because my eyes are red from all the tears, the comments have been so supportive and overwhelming in the greatest way possible

[@Lift_Eachother_Up]

Subbed for REN. I also have struggled with my ADHD, depression, anxiety, eating disorder. Ren is truly in my eyes a modern day prophet. And I don't care who thinks I'm crazy for that.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

You must be my twin. I don't want to list all my acronyms... ugh. He's amazing for sure. He will go down in history. I'm certain of it

[@two-sense]

We're all crazy, just in different ways. And yes, he is a modern day prophet. He is a leader without even trying.

[@Lift_Eachother_Up]

@@choppedliver_reacts You will find thousands more humans from around the entire world that are your twins also. lol my acronyms go on for days I always growing up have felt alone like I was just defected for some reason compared to my interpretation to the people around me. After I found Ren it seriously changed my life in a way nothing ever has and it was just so simple I don't feel alone. I don't feel defected. I feel like a human and I see the number of humans like me around the world and reality hits my whole life I thought there is something wrong with me but now I see there is something wrong with the world specifically the people who have the most money and power. The people who keep us divided.

[@steveames5797]

Thanks for the real reaction - you have a long and inspirational rabbit hole waiting for you - REN!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Can't wait! 🙏

[@jjgallag1]

You picked a great artist to review and you did great. If this video doesn’t make you cry, then you’re probably not human.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

100% agree

[@AuntieSocial123]

I think of Ren as the cousin we’re all rooting for. Welcome to KZbin!

[@char_lou]

I found Ren when Hi Ren hit my KZbin feed, and I fell deep. Such an intelligent, well-read master of lyrics and delivery, so musically talented, so raw and vulnerable. So moving. You're right, about why we relate to Hi Ren .. it's the insight Ren brings to human vulnerability, to mental health, to hope. So insightful, and profoundly moving. Ren has been making music, composing songs for many years. Since I found him, I've watched and listened to everything he has done. So much to discover and appreciate, so many moods and messages, and even (sometimes delightfully crass) playfulness. One of my favourite early Ren songs is so sweet and encouraging and optimistic .. It's Alright.. kzbin.info/www/bejne/nnTWgnePbaZppcksi=9dfHgjz2sFvUc26g 20:10

[@kendalldarveaux]

As a lot of people have been saying, every aspect of the video was done well. If you continue to be this honest and genuine in future videos, you'll find a following - or they'll find you.

[@tombrowning5279]

First off, thank you for your service. Second, great job on the reaction. You make people think/feel. That’s a gift; don’t hide behind any fears or doubts. Let is shine brother! Cheers!! Keep on!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Tom 🙏 Reading all these positive comments has been an amazing experience. Thank so much.

[@reactivereplays5666]

Welcome to the Renegades! This rabbit is is deep and VERY vast! No 2 songs sound the same. There is NOTHING he can not do. He can sing, act, rap, make beats, beatbox, and play many instruments to name just a few things.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I am going to have my hands full deep diving on Ren's collection. Thank you for commenting!

[@jeffdahlke2093]

Sound, lighting, etc. all good. As good as anyone's. I appreciate your honesty and your thoughts. Hi Ren hits me every time. I hope you'll react to more Ren videos. It doesn't mean that you have to like them all or say he is the greatest artist...just be yourself. You'll find that his fans are very supportive. Anyways, I'll subscribe (I don't follow more than a few reactors) and I encourage you to stick with it. All the best.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much... Might seem small to some, but having my first comment, my first subscriber, is a huge milestone for me. Thank you so much for your kind words and support. Much love. ❤

[@MiltonWadams-w8k]

I agree! Liked and subscribed. I admire anyone who can put themselves out there like this.

[@sorenm.lairdsorries7547]

Welcome to the Rennaissance @Choppedliver_reacts and 🙏 thank you ❤ for your empathetic and insightful Ren reaction! I liked 👍 it and subscribed 🔔. Ren has got an awesome back catalogue, and I am looking forward to you discovering it. So what do you want to see and hear next? A ballady thing w/guitar? 🎸🧑‍🎤🧑‍🎤💊⚪ Ren X Chinchilla - Chalk Outlines (live). Rap? 🐟&🍟🌈🚢🌊 Genesis. Illest of our Time. Rappetyrap? 🐷 The Hunger. Boom Bap? Halftime (Nas Retake). Fun stuff? 👯👯👯👯❤🎶 Love Music. Raggae? 🎸🎸🎸🥁 The Big Push - I Shot The Sheriff/Road To Zion/Hip Hop (red suspenders). Hard beats? 💉🐷💊 Sick Boi or 🦁🐷🦍 Animal Flow. Goofy madness? 🚲🐺🦍 Losing It! (FISHER Rap). More EDM & Rap? 🥁 Down On The Beat. Masterly storytelling horror stories? ❎❎🎸🎺🏥🔪 The Tale of Jenny and Screech (full 13 min version). Another great one-take storytelling short movie? 🚗🔫 Murderer or 🎸💰🐚 Money Game or What Went Wrong? Deep thoughts? ☁ Dear God, Meaning or Dominoes. Trippy electronica? 🎹💊 Diazepam. Souly-folksy Rap? "Do you Believe?". Bluesy? "Hold On!" or 🚗 Everybody Drops. More singing? 🧑‍🎤 Humble. Singing high notes? Back on 74 / Message in a Bottle Retake. Acapella singing? 💰🐚 Money Game Part 2 (Live) or Loco. Acapella freestyle battle-Rap? 👑 Dumb King Come. Harmonies? 🦢 The Big Push - Swan Song. Crazy Punk? 🐰 The Big Push - XBox Marijoana. A song in French language? 🥖 French Song. Radio-hits? 🔥 Fire or 🍟 Uninvited. Have great fun! Renegades do not like when reactors do Violet's Tale before Jenny and Screech. Best to use this (13 min-long) version that has them in order: kzbin.info/www/bejne/ioqkn6SHYpJ-jpI

[@two-sense]

Wow! That was so generous of you to list a bunch of (all?) Ren's songs. I started down the Ren Rabbit Hole a few months ago and am amazed at not only his genius, but his Renegades are always so eloquent and sincere in their comments. Such beauty in this world is so needed. Thank you Ren and thank you to all of his fans. I want him to blow up soon, but stay independent for life. Is that possible? We'll see.

[@sorenm.lairdsorries7547]

@@two-sense Ren has more than 260 music videos more or less officially out, the list is just a way of showing his diversity in different genres and delivery. It is not his "best of" either, because, nearly all of his stuff is first class, making it hard to say what is the very best. Money Game Part 3 would be among the best, but you can pick anything by him instead and won't be disappointed. As long as you don't watch Violet before Jenny and Screech. 🙂

[@user-ey9bt1bn6n]

Welcome to the world of ren, it’s not worth keeping the subtitles on they generally can’t keep up.

[@luisrivera3056]

Keep reacting, keep connecting, and take your eyes off the shadows. Many times we forget to look up, we forget to be grateful, and we forget that our healing is one praise away...

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I'm going to give it my best. Yes, gratitude is essential. Unfortunately I know a lot more about what I should be doing than I do about actually doing. Growing is hard

[@luisrivera3056]

@@choppedliver_reacts You got this! Complete the mission!

[@kizzykat]

Wonderful reaction. Everything was perfect. Rens music will touch parts of your soul you thought were lost, and brings emotions up for release. In the release you are free, being weak in your strength is courageous and brave . I can only speak for myself but I am sure the comment section will agree we are here for you . Love from the UK.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I so agree with this. I couldn't have put it better. Thank you kind human I have never met, for showing compassion for a complete stranger. The world needs more of that.

[@Cannabian]

As someone with a girlfriend who struggles with suicidal thought my heart goes out to you man. There isn't enough compassion for people struggling within the system we've constructed. It's an 18 month wait for government funded DBT where I live, that's after a hospital stay for her. Absolutely ridiculous, it's struggle after struggle for you guys and I commend the effort.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much for your support and comments. Hugs for you and your girlfriend.

[@ILTOMBA]

I love your sincerity and openness, well done! Embrace the vulnerability, the community will love you for it.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I will do my best. Thank you!

[@daveologhlen]

Respect, It ain't easy being real....keep the faith man. and remember what Lynrd Skynrd said, be a simple man....Keep it simple, and remember that the little thing's matter.....One day at a time....✌

[@amygone2pot]

44 subs after one day is a great start. Sound and lighting is as good as most and better than some. Be mentored by Ren - stay real and work hard at perfecting what you do - and your followers will come.

[@chrisparti]

That was wonderful, very authentic. I loved it... Give yourself a massive pat on the back dude you deserve it... Great job

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Ugh. It was so hard. But I'm so glad I did it. The support from all you guys has been amazing. The word gratitude seems such a weak description for what I'm feeling

[@caroline_scotland]

Great honest reaction💕 Much love to you from Scotland💙🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[@choppedliver_reacts]

OMG. my ancestors are from Scotland and Wales. Clan McNeil from Island of Barra I believe. It's on my PLACES TO GO WITH MY BAE BEFORE I DIE list.. Thank you for your beautiful comment my friend

[@caroline_scotland]

@@choppedliver_reacts Awhh really.. Barra is absolutely stunning☺️ It’s so peaceful, and has the most gorgeous beaches ever.. You’d think you were in the Caribbean, but without the sweltering heat to go with it🥵😂haha Yous will honestly love it there.. it’s truly magical, yous will never want to leave🙂 Best wishes to you and ur bae, from Edinburgh💙🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[@Wendy2218-rb1zi]

You did it! I look forward to more real authentic reactions from you. Remember to add a few lighter Ren songs into your journey too. Balance is everything.

[@char_lou]

It's Alright by Ren is a marvellous encouraging, optimistic song ❤

[@T_Witti]

Also It's Alright by The Big Push :D

[@chuckw4947]

Your first video...tech-wise... was certainly better than most. Thanks for joining the ranks of sincere content providers...my true heroes these days!!! Looking forward to your future uploads and wishing you the best in achieving your life's goals... I'll save my hundreds of suggestions for another time...just wanted to applaud the reaction and let you know that your effort also encourages me and likely many others as well.... you are worthy and much appreciated.....Love and Peace for Us All!!!!!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you thank you Chuck 🙏 I'm always open for suggestions! Ren is passing the encouragement forward. He helped me get off my ass. It's either do something now, accept my mediocre life and stop whining about it, get older, still did nothing, look back with a lifetime of regret.... or, get off my ass now and do something. Ren was my tipping point. I've been hating myself for the last two months for procrastinating doing this, and it was do or die time

[@two-sense]

@@choppedliver_reacts I'm 68. Every once in a while, I listen to Pink Floyds "Time" just to remind me to not put things off and to value what is our most important wealth.

[@CristyB66]

Yes please, we want more of your reaction videos! Thanks for sharing your feelings, and never apologize for sobbing, I listened to this song a hundred times and I sob everytime again.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Cristy! I am so deeply touched by the support I've received. 🙏🙏🙏 Trust me I was holding back a flood of tears, I've watched it many times sobbing as well

[@Never2old2boogie]

Thank you for being so vulnerable! Throughout my lifetime I've struggled with various forms of mental health issues many not to my own doing. I had an accident 2 years ago that has left me homebound and losing family members. I just discovered reactions and you touch me and I'm an instant subscriber.. thank you for being so open and honest I wish I could have reached out and given you a hug at the same time I didn't feel so alone in the world. I found that this is also an outlet for people who I'm referring to as haters. I noticed they troll reactions and copy and paste the same negative comments. Please ignore them and know you will have loyal family subscribers. ❤ Ty as a previous comment stated if we give you some advice on reactions it's not negative from the ones who truly care 🤗

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Ren touched me, I touched you, you touch others. It's a beautiful circle of paying it forward. Thank you for the warnings. I will try to disregard them. I've always been quick to disregard praise and take criticism to heart. But I'm trying.

[@two-sense]

@@choppedliver_reacts Let these words sink in: PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE. Notice, no criticism? Great job, brother.

[@somewhereinarizona793]

Congrats on your first reaction video! You picked a banger to start with! Thanks for being vulnerable. Best to you.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much

[@ralphroder3136]

You are doing just fine mate. I love your reaction. Keep it coming, you are doing just fine. Subscribed!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you kind sir for your support!

[@sheenadees2701]

For me the ending where he's talking about the pendulum and about how for as light as it gets is as dark as it gets It struck me as much better then battling good and evil.Because inside of us we don't have to be evil but we are going to sin.We're going to have dark times it's a balance that we have to learn to make the dance work correctly.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Makes you realize how profound the whole concept of in and yang really is. There's no joy without sadness, no hope without despair, no light without dark, no achievement without struggles

[@two-sense]

@@choppedliver_reacts You learn that sailing on the ocean. In big waves, I mean really big, you get to see for miles around when you are on top of one, and a few seconds later you are plunged into a deep trough that seems impossible to come out of. But you do rise out of the trough each time.

[@cosmiczoso]

excellent reaction.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you friend!

[@ryanclarke4482]

Let's go, keep it up. I'll be back subbed 💙 Keep stepping forwards.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you for the encouragement! I thought this was a train wreck of a first try, but it was a step forward. I'll keep stepping!

[@francesdoll4039]

You did gteat! Thank you for being brave. You show the way too. I think the most impactful lines for me were " I'll inspire the meek to be stong". He is brave and clear and strong and cries all tbe time!😂 He has inspired so many people to be brave and try these things out of our comfort zone. Love listening to him talk about creativity and how we shoukd just do and not judge ourselves. So i applaud you. I subbed for more Ren! ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Frances for your kind words. It means more than you know. The support I've received in less than 24 hours has me in tears :( Ren is amazing. We shouldn't judge ourselves, but we do, and I'm definitely my worst critic! I will do more Ren when I have the strength. Any recommendations?

[@francesdoll4039]

@@choppedliver_reacts Yes! Do Power please. This was done right after he left his management. He was so so fed up with the greed abd control, he and his friend and videographer taped 2 cell phones to the dashboard of the car and just did this abd released it without trying to control anything like hype or timing. Everybody loves this banger! And no crying at all, though it is still Ren being totally transparent .

[@choppedliver_reacts]

@@francesdoll4039 I will check it out!

[@martinm1231]

RELAX !!!!!!!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Ha! Easier said than done! :) It will come with practice!

[@two-sense]

@@choppedliver_reacts Have you heard of the 4-2-6 breathing exercise to induce a relaxed state?

[@petternss1025]

YOU WAS GREAT ))) GOOD LUCK FURTHER !! 👋👋👋❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much!

[@ShamWerks]

Sending you a virtual hug buddy. I was a mess too the first time I heard this piece ; I'm not gonna lie, I've listened to it a few hundred times at this point and still have a lump in my throat. Wishing you the best. 👍

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you! Sending one back. I've heard it many times as well, and the first few times, I absolutely could not have recorded a video, it would have been 20 minutes of pausing and sobbing lol.

[@WheretheDarkthingsare]

Don't be scared! Some assholes here but most of us are awesome!! Welcome and great react! #RENegade

[@jbstyliin]

Thank you for sharing a part of you that many will not. We all fight this internal battle on many varied levels. In my view, we're all cracked eggs and we have the free will to sit around and spoil or turn us into the best souflet we can. Thanks my brother! James

[@choppedliver_reacts]

So true James! That's one reason I have a hard time with social media. Everyone seems perfect on the surface. I'm like... what's wrong with me? If Ren can talk about his stuff, I can talk about mine.

[@bethosbornefischer3315]

Big hugs. The Renegades have you. You're one of ours, and you're never alone. The idea of "burden" is onenof many things society uses to divide us. To create "greater" and "lesser", and to create shame. You are not a burden, though. You prove it here, in this video, and I'm sure, in other ways in your life. You have shown more courage here than some of us gain our whole lives. You've got this.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I woke up this morning and my followers went from 23 or something to over 50. Your comments have touched my soul, and I have not been able to keep my eyes dry all morning. I'm at work right now typing this and trying to hide from everyone because my eyes are read. Thank you my friends. The renegades have my eternal gratitude for encouraging me and making me feel something hopeful for a change

[@melissaandjosh6210]

Great reaction !! Congrats on taking that first step to do something outside of your comfort zone. As someone who is similar in age to yourself the first time I heard Hi Ren it broke me ( in a good way ) and made me realize it’s ok to show “weakness” . Hope you react to more Ren and I’d suggest anything live by Chris Stapleton. He has a strong reaction following and like Ren is just next level talent. I’ll be following your journey.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much. Yeah, if this had been a first reaction, it would have been unwatchable lol. Completely broken. I will definitely keep your suggestion in mind. I've heard a little bit of Chris Stapleton, and I agree, Ren is next level. Thank you for following my journey. I'm very touched by the support I've already seen even with just 19 comments.

[@T_Witti]

One of the first reactions I saw to Hi Ren was that from Rosalie, you might want to watch it to see it's totally ok (and somewhat normal) to be crushed during/after a Ren song

[@JensRandolff]

Great reaction, brother. Much respect for having the courage to open up. I am a 58 y/o, totally and permanently disabled veteran who has been suffering from Chronic Multisymptom Illness (Gulf War Illness) for over 30 years. I have been dealing with mental health issues (Major Clinical Depression, Bipolar Disorder, and Unspecified Mood Disorder) in addition to various chronic physical issues. My mental health cost me a successful military career, a marriage, and friendships to the point that I have become a total recluse for the past 10 years. My condition was brought on by prolonged exposure to low-dose sarin nerve gas and experimental vaccines and meds during the Gulf War. A few years later, the now black-boxed use of the anti-malarial drug "Mefloquine" pushed me over the edge, and I experienced a psychotic episode. For over 15 years, I was in therapy and prescribed a cocktail of max doses of psychotropics until I decided to carefully wean myself off all medications in 2014. The side effects of the drugs were too many and too severe, left me an emotional zombie and the benefits were negligible. I still struggle with my mental health, as well as physical symptoms, daily, but I rather feel pain than nothing at all. Ren has been able to express through his songs what I have been unsuccessfully trying to communicate to others regarding my mental, emotional, and physical struggles. Each new day, I wholly rely on God for my strength and remind myself that I am doing better than I deserve; without Him, I would have "checked out" a long time ago.

[@MsCheesemonster13]

It was a really good reaction, and I’m surprised that it’s your first. Sound and picture quality were excellent, and this video obviously means a lot to you, which is going to please all of us Ren fans. You are thoughtful, intelligent and articulate, and you have a pleasant voice, so you start off with quite a few advantages over a lot of the KZbinrs that are already out there. Oh, a lot of reactors get emotional over Ren’s videos, which is not surprising as he touches on some really difficult and uncomfortable issues that affect all of us in some way or another.

[@hummingbirdstones]

Thank you for your service, sir! You did great on your very first reaction. This song hits most people in some way and is so raw, it brings out emotions in most people who see it. I've seen this video hundreds of times now, and it still gets me. Keep on being you and honestly reacting to the music. No need to be ashamed of having feelings or sharing them. Renegades are very good at supporting other folks. I subbed to watch your journey. 😇

[@abbymathews5088]

Excellent reaction my guy! You were open and honest most importantly. Your sound was excellent. Bad sound quality makes me peevish. I can’t wait for more Ren. I’m sure Renegades will show up in droves. I’ve subbed. I’m proud of you. 😉💙✌️

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Abby! Pretty emotionally wipe right now from the amazing support. I will get to more Ren, I promise. In the meantime I'll probably be posting some more light hearted stuff. I never thought I'd have people on the internet who I've never met be proud of me. It's amazing

[@abbymathews5088]

@@choppedliver_reacts I’m incredibly proud of you. It takes courage to open up the way you did. It takes courage to start a channel. Renegades will show up, and we will have your back. Ren believes in lifting others up and practices what he preaches. We do the same. Some fun Ren songs are “What You Want”, “Losing It”, “Loco”, and “Uninvited”. He has so much music between his solo stuff and band The Big Push. Take care. 😉💙💙🇺🇸💙💙✌️

[@frankensteinfpv]

Love you brother! Appreciate you brother! You're not alone, and thank you for taking that plunge into the unknown. You may not realise but this vid has helped many people like yourself. And the Renegade family are the best family to come into when you need good people. Bless you brother and may you find a little more happiness and love through this new platform you've dove into...

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you so much for your kind words. My cynical, angry view of people and humanity in general has gone through a paradigm shift since discovering Ren and the community of followers. There is hope for the world after all

[@T_Witti]

#theRenEffect

[@scottdominguez2738]

Well done. I've watched a lot of Hi Ren reactions, because I think it's interesting to hear different people's takes on what I think is a great and important song. I think reactions like yours are no less important than those that have something "profound" to say. Welcome home.

[@Dr.Brummel]

Great job man. 👍Subscribed! I can so understand that and how it hits you. Much love and big hugs.❤🫂 You are in good hands with the RENegades. We all know the situation where a song totally messes us up and/or we tear up. But that's okay. We're here for each other. That's why I want to be part of this community. When doing more reactions don't just do the heavy stuff, do some uplifting and funny stuff as well.😃 Sorry, but I think it was a bit funny when you started criticizing your own video at the end (19:00) before you've even published it. You sounded exactly like the bad side of Ren in the song. Stay on the light side: you did a great job. One hint: I would turn off the subtitles as they are often erroneous. Ren normally has the lyrics in the description or in a comment below the video. Most lyrics of other songs can be found on the internet somewhere.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

You are bang on. Didn't even realize it till you pointed it out... My inner bad Ren has been with me most of my life due to some rough circumstances. It's hard to dump that baggage, but I'm giving it a go. Thank you for the honest analysis and insight

[@Dr.Brummel]

@@choppedliver_reacts I know this inner critic only too well from my own experience. It is always easier to recognize these mechanisms in others than in ourselfs. But at least we have recognized it and we are working on becoming better and better dancers.

[@sheenadees2701]

I think part of the reason that Ren's music touches people so much. Which I do appreciate you're sharing your feelings with us. That's something a lot of people won't do. They will get up and walk out before they show you their tears. But I noticed that the more ished you've gone through. The more ren's music tends to touch you. And I want you to know you're not alone. There's a lot of us that are in the same boat. Or similar boats as you, not all of us have been through the service like you, which I thank you for, but life isn't always easy for everybody, and Ren has had a hugely difficult life. So his ability to connect with those of us who have had difficult lives causes a wave of emotions.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Absolutely. It's hard. And I agree about going through a lot of sh8t. I've been through my share of it. It's so easy to compare myself to everyone in life I feel like has it better than me and wonder "why me". But also, there's so many people who have it worse off, which I also must remember. Like ren said though, there's victims and students. I try to pick myself up, learn, and move forward. But we are all human. We are going to feel things, we are going to take steps forward and steps backward. I've felt like giving up many times, but I've always managed to pick myself up and go forward again. I'm definitely my worst critic, but if I had to give myself credit, it would that I eventually bottom out and move forward again. Eventually.

[@aroma101524]

i have had depression and anxiety for years and i take medication. my partner lost his mum at christmas and i could see he really wasn’t coping. he came home one day and cried about how bad he was feeling. i made him an appointment and he started medication which is something i never thought he would take but he is doing better now keep being you there’s no shame in mental health problems. so happy you found Ren. he is one amazing artist and person

[@robingayle68]

Renegade here for you and your trip down the Ren rabbit hole 🐇 🕳️❤ Liked and subscribed for more Ren ❤

[@lynnrogers9236]

Your honest and heartfelt reaction had me subscribe. The tears you shed were in commiseration and empathy for another. That is the epitome of strength. I checked out your reaction because I am a Renegade, and I remained to the end because of who you are. I am a survivor of childhood trauma who is well over 60 and still striving to deal with those voices. Thank you for taking this action on your own behalf for all of us. Old Musician From Seattle

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Well I have a lot more tears to give. I have them reading these comments. I'm quite emotionally exhausted these last few days. Most of my trauma comes from childhood trauma as well. Hugs to you, from a friend you've never met.

[@lynnrogers9236]

@@choppedliver_reacts Hugs right back my friend. Remain resplendent in your divergence 🤗

[@anglosifiedluso1511]

You are brave for doing this. Please do not think you are being "pathetic" as you said. It takes courage and from what I saw in your 20 minute video I can see that. Keep strong. Perhaps listen to more of Ren's music. If you want to talk then you are more than welcome to get in touch. Big virtual hug. Life as you are well aware is not easy. "We must not forget that we are Human Beings"

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I'm pretty emotionally wiped right now from all the outpouring of support and comments. But I'll definitely listen to more. Thank you for taking the time to comment and I truly appreciate every comment and show of support I've received. It's pretty overwhelming

[@anglosifiedluso1511]

@@choppedliver_reacts I can imagine you are overwhelmed. Remember, there are still lovely people on this mud ball. Peace.

[@yilomina2047]

So glad you chose the iconic Hi Ren for your inaugural video - welcome to KZbin, we're always happy to meet a fellow Renegade!

[@CTomSmithJr]

Good reaction. Good luck in the future.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Tom!

[@scottcostantini6501]

From one introvert to another, I applaud your strength in putting out this reaction video. I am 63 years old and have also struggled with severe depression and anxiety. My internal voice got to the point where I had to take some time off from work and reach out for help. I told my therapist yesterday that I felt guilty because so many people have much worse problems than I do. I also told him that I felt ashamed to be weak and not strong enough to continue struggling to get by each day at a time. He stopped me in my tracks and pointed out that I am stronger than most people because no matter how much I suffer, I bravely continue to make life better for me and those who are close to me. Please believe me when I say that posting this reaction video makes you a hero in my eyes and I proudly shared your tears rolling down my face. Thank you for showing your vulnerability and putting it out ther for the world to see.

[@christelsegbars1630]

Hi beautiful human, welcome to the reactionworld, honousty is appriciated. Thank you for your reaction, I gladly subscribe. Please accept the biggest hug your heart can handle from a stranger from the Netherlands ❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Hug received. I'm so grateful 🙏❤️

[@user-gp8jk5kw1x]

Hang in there brother-man, you're doing just fine. Great pick for a first reaction and more Ren reactions would be a good decision as well - he is just killin" it. Also, Tom MacDonald and Nova Rockafeller (his g.f.) reactions always do well because the entire H.O.G. (hang over gang - their loyal fan base) always show up with tons of support which will boost your numbers significantly. Trust me on this!

[@tommieev5589]

I am very proud of you. It takes a lot to make the first step. Your ability to let yourself be raw and real is a true strength. I hope that each successive step allows you to feel more and more comfortable in your skin. BTW, the lighting and sound were great. Thank you for starting. Thank you for admitting the difficulty of taking that first step. Who knows, the strength you showed by starting may be just the inspiration someone needs to take their own first step toward something they have been avoiding. Well met, indeed, sir.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

@@tommieev5589 that was an amazing comment, thank you so much Tommie

[@garysherwin3316]

Im 62 and this young man is quickly becoming the artist of my lifetime 🇬🇧😊

[@alsadekalkhayer7007]

Whenever tired, look how far you've come. Hang in there brother 🙏🌸💚🌸 Love the video, keep it up 😊... I'm subscribing

[@sheenadees2701]

Great artist to start with.Hopefully we can get the renegades over here.I will let you know.I do tend to comment as I go so if I say something that you say later in the video.That's why although usually I catch it and say you know.Look, sorry I didn't know you were gonna say that earlier.But I know the trick.The more comments you get the more you get pushed out into the algorithm.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Looks like they are showing up in force ! :)

[@Never2old2boogie]

In addition to my previous comment. I was very pleased to see all the positivity you've received in the comments. I never usually send any. You should be proud of yourself to see all these positive remarks and know you've touched people. Stay true to yourself and that was real attract us subscribers who like genuine heartfelt reactions. I'm so pleased to meet you. And yes sir sound audio quality is excellent many haters complain about having to pause. It's necessary for copyrights and us good folks understand LOL I was having a tough night tonight and so glad I stumbled upon your reaction. You touched my soul.I hope you go to sleep one day after reading this and feel good about yourself. 💯💙

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Ugh, everyone here has touched me, and knowing I've touched people just from sharing my experience is an amazing feeling. It's like this "pay it forward" chain started with Ren. My first day after doing and waking up and reading comments wiped me emotionally in a very good way. Thank you for taking the time to comment. It's amazing how much good a single comment can do

[@fredrikekholm3718]

Great reaction. I can see that this is uncomfortable this is for you, which makes it even more impressive; you're not letting your fear or uncomfortable feelings hinder you and that takes courage. As others have written; showing "weakness" is quite the opposite of weak, it's rather quite brave tbh. Keeping feelings squashed down so deep that you can't even feel them anymore isn't brave; bravery is feeling those feelings deeply and not hiding them away. I think you're really on the right track here. It's not easy to really feel things deeply, but it's the only way to work through them. Thanks for the video =D Oh btw; the lighting is ok, sound is fine and your commentary is good. Quite impressive for a first video!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Uncomfortable: Understatement of the year award lol. Thank you for your encouragement and kind words

[@doingitwrong3723]

Bleep better. You DID. Good stuff.

[@juliannemil6158]

Renegade here. Sharing love for Ren. And those who promote and push for his art.

[@MikeyPea72]

A great start to your reaction career, an honest and raw reaction, just what us RENegades are looking for. Liked & subscribed for more Ren

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Mikey. The renegades have touched me deeply and I am grateful

[@RobertMichaelStewart]

Prayers up ❤️🙏.... Glad to help give you support.... 👍And subscribed!

[@pamthealmighty]

Duuuuuude! Absolutely appreciate how you broke thru those nerves and shared this video. As a Renegade & fellow Introvert, I'm so proud of you! Rens music gives us hope. Great job!! 😁

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Pam!!!! It wasn't easy! Glad I did it though, the reaction to my reaction was quite unexpected and completely amazing

[@suesee4855]

Wow! Your 1st video is HI Ren?! Bold. Thank you for sharing. (FYI, although this a little different, people do prefer a 1st watch) Much love ❤️ Sue

[@alyssakesterson9797]

Thank you for your service! Also, you did an amazing job on your first video. Showing how you really feel is beautiful. I absolutely love REN. He is the best and has helped me alot. I have a lot of mental health issues. I cry everytime i watch a reaction video for this song. We all cry together! You have gained a supportive community now. Ignore the negative people. I cant wait to see your next video! ❤😊

[@jasonmoad9784]

Good job brother 👍🏻 Use the community for support and F the trolls 👍🏻🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

I'm proud of you, we all do go through similar battles. We are human beings. Ren has a band called The Big Push. I recommend War Pigs and I Shot the sheriff. I look forward to more reactions from you 😊

[@shirleycarter2231]

You have found Ren as I did……hit me like an emotional sledge hammer….expressed all the issues I knew of but could never have put into words…… especially in such a beautiful artistic form. You got a new sub and I wish you luck with your ambitions … ❤️❤️🖤🖤

[@kristietarbox5666]

Bravo on your first video... Thank you for your service... Sending love and healing light...✌️

[@davidarmes747]

One of the best reactions I've seen. Don't put yourself down man. You're going to be great at this. I can feel it!!! 💪

[@user-jl7dd2fz5c]

Your first song!And straidaway Hi Ren.Cool!Stay strong bro i am with you!Go for it!❤❤❤

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you. It was Ren who pushed me out of my comfort zone. It had to be Ren!

[@JulitaLena123]

No words needed, just breath❤ Appreciate you😊

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you Julita. I felt a flood of emotions, but I kinda suck at putting them into words. 🙏

[@JulitaLena123]

@@choppedliver_reacts You don't have to, I think most of us had the same reaction ❤️

[@T_Witti]

You sir are incredible brave! I could never do that, I could never get infront of a camera and present myself to the world. The lighting was good, the audio as well, the reaction was heartfelt even though you already watched it multiple times. You already seem to be a true Renegade if it still hits you so hard! There's no need to pause to say something profound. It's ok to only pause if you want to say something. You also can play the song in one go, if you have copyright issues, Rens team will sort it out for you, he supports reactors, he want's people to react to his stuff. Not only are you brave, you're also pretty smart (or lucky), you definitely picked the perfect artist for your first go - we got you! A rising tide lifts all ships and your ship is about to fly high! I don't know how deep you already dived into his catalogue and usually I'd request something else but for you it feels like Ren x Chinchilla - How To Be Me is perfect

[@choppedliver_reacts]

The first time was utter emotional destruction. Thank you for the support, the suggestion, and the tips! I read every single comment!

[@sanoraray]

Im less than 2 minutes in, and Sir, I want to hug you. Please dont call emotions, "weaknesses"and please dont apologize for having them. I dont know who decided for the rest of us that genuine people have to apologize, and fake people never feel the need. I can't wait to watch the whole thing, but I will tell you that right off the bat. This is great, I subbed for more and will be spreading the word. You are safe in this world. I promise. Will there be a few douch canoes along the way..maybe but that is not the RENagades, and they dont speak for us. Any suggestions are made to help. ❤❤

[@sanoraray]

Just finished and as I though it was great.

[@salishseamermaid]

Great first reaction! I often say that Ren reactions are a form of therapy. I hope you'll find that to be true as well. You are not alone. ❤ Ren's song Troubles would be another great reaction, if you want to dig into more of his personal story (it's another emotional one, but not at the level of Hi Ren).

[@snakecharm13]

The audio and lighting were just fine! Nice open and honest review. I'm 50 and ten is the first artist I've been really excited about in 25 years.

[@davidhabgood]

Very nice reaction friend. Like others I would like to acknowledge your courage and strength in putting this authentic reaction out there. I hope you can celebrate what you achieved and be proud that you had the bravery to overcome the barriers within yourself. Accepting that you have more courage than the internal and external critics helps to insulate from the negative voices, though it is in our nature to feel the impact of these disproportionately compared to the value we put upon supportive comments.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you kind sir for the very insightful and truthful comment!

[@robertproctor9747]

Do not put yourself down. This was a FANTASTIC reaction. You are a natural Renegade and, as the comments below already show, the Renegade community is going to love you.

[@laurabuxton7041]

My friend, if you want to start a KZbin channel, you definitely chose the right song as your first reaction. You have subscribers now, that’s for sure! Thoroughly enjoyed this video and I will definitely be telling my friends. The “Renegades” are amazing, the best audience you could ask for. Looking forward to seeing your reactions in future, thank you for being an authentic human being ❤️

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I'm quite stunned by the outcome. Doesn't seem real. I'm touched, overwhelmed, and amazed. Can't wait to do more! Thank you my friend

[@adam.4487]

I hope you will let all of us see your beautiful eyes! From one veteran to another [me Air Force] I am at the age that I want to hear more and SEE more. Life is short. I will be getting eye surgery next month if all goes well at next appointment and the pre op exam goes well. Two years I tried but failed the preop with high blood pressure, a half blocked artery and constant stress now just waiting to get my health a bit better for this momentous vision issue finally taken care of. The thoughts that go through my mind being a pessimist I usually always think the worst while trying to hope for the best. I now wish the best for you, and I will be back to see how you are doing and seeing and hearing more reactions.

[@choppedliver_reacts]

Thank you for the compliment ( eye :) I will definitely be doing more! Thank you for your support

[@TombHermance]

Tip: KZbin’s captions for REN are always wrong. It’s best to turn it off. Keep up the genuine reactions!

[@choppedliver_reacts]

I've noticed. Will do!

[@katherinewilliams2385]

REN is helping so many people! It doesn’t matter what anyone else may think of you or say about you, and what they may think of you is none of your business and has NOTHING to do with YOU! Who cares? Do you look up to these people? Do you hope to be like them one day? (I certainly hope not!)… so what they think won’t matter to you in the end. Laugh if you want, cry if you want, and BE who you want! You don’t have enough time to even consider these people. You are perfectly you! If any of them could have been a better YOU, then they would have been… but YOU were given to YOU. You are you and you are doing the job perfectly! Hit me up if you ever want to talk… I’m usually up late and bored, lol! I am a safe person and I think you know what I mean!

[@bojnebojnebojne]

No need for any apology. Your reaction is honest and pure. Just like Ren's video. Ren truly has a way with words like no other artist i've heard in many years. This particular piece and style is generally not something i like, but this video and the lyrics just hit me right in the very soul. As someone who has lived with severe depression for 40 years now, it struck a a real chord with me. Ren has an unparalleled ability to convey emotion with words. I can't call it song really, coz to me it's more than that, it goes way beyond just a song to me. I have said to other people who react to Hi Ren that i think it's one of the most accurately told and illustrated pieces of art that depict the eternal conflict of the human condition. The battle between the so called "Heaven" and "Hell" and the setting of the eternal conflicts battlefield is the human psyche. Just know that when it feels like you are in the darkest of places, no matter how dark it may seem and feel, know that your are not alone. I know that if you are in that dark place right now, this wont help at all, i know that very well because we don't think with a rational mind when we are at our lowest. All i can say as someone who still walks this earth despite many times being close to call it a day is this: Learn to see the signs of when you are about to fall down, learn about yourself, know yourself and try to come to terms with and accept that maybe, just maybe, this is as good as it ever gets. That way the struggle probably will turn a little bit easier. As Ren put it: It's not a battle for us to "win", it's an Eternal Dance. If we aim to get rid of it completely, we seek to become more than human. We all have our own struggles, to some it may seem less or worse. But all of us carry our very own personal hell and some of us have lost our touch with our heaven. And in order to find a resemblance of heaven again, we need to find ourselves first, Who We Are. I am not a religious person but there is no doubt that the religious ideas makes for a very good concept based way of describing things. There is after all a reason why one of the most captivating stories of all time are those of religious texts. Because who doesn't love a good story? :) And so with these words I hope your days become just a little bit brighter Sir! Godspeed and much love from Sweden!

[@MrLesseroftwoevils]

Okay Renegades let's do our thing and help this fan any way we can by subscribing, liking, and sharing

[@daniellusk9160]

Nice job. I'm excited to see your journey. I'm glad you took the leap and started your channel!